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[nishinini]

everyone knows friends with benefits but what about enemies with benefits and it’s constant angst with a dash of one sided love

[nishinini]

♡ sand will always slip through your hands

— after the breakup, the five senses [ touch ] | nishimura riki vers.

if i were to describe ni-ki’s love as something that you could touch, something that you could feel, it’d be the feeling of hand going through your hand on a day at the beach. while you walk, it clings to you everywhere. it’s comforting in a sense, the sand soft yet rough in your hand as you watch it return to its home. it’s a familiar feeling, almost childlike in a way. 

yet at the same time, the sand seems to find its way somewhere on you even when you think you’ve finally managed to get it all off. it’s in your hair, in your shoes, in your pockets days after. it seems to ever end, always reminding you somehow of where you’ve been to the point where it can get a little... annoying. you tire of the sand and do not wish to go back.

the happiness only lasts for a short while.

eventually, we all grow up and realize that life isn’t always sunny days and messy hair. 

and somewhere down the line, reality hits. 

loving ni-ki happened for a short while. but when you least expected it yet the memories you shared attacked you when you least expected it. but now, now you’ve grown since then. after all, sand will always slip through your hands. 

♡ after the breakup au masterlist // main masterlist // navi

[nishinini]

♡ pages of a book

— after the breakup, the five senses [ touch ] | park jay vers.

if i were to describe jay’s love as something that you could touch, something that you could feel, it’d be the turning of pages in a book. for an artist, a sketchbook. for a writer, a journal. for a reader, a story. in his own way, jay holds a sort of uniqueness around him, his love a new world in itself. as you turn the page whether it’s to draw, write, or read, there’s a sort of excitement that fills you. you don’t know what comes next in the plot whether its a story already published or one you’ve decided to write just as how you let your imagination go wild when you draw. it’s something so simple, something anyone and everyone could get their hands on yet it holds so much depth and complexity. 

yet there are times when you as an artist feel frustrated and want to tear up the pages of something you’ve drawn. or as a writer you just want to scribble all over the words you’ve written because you feel as if they’re not good enough. and as a reader, you just want to scream at the characters because the plot isn’t how it “should be” going. suddenly your fingers are met with paper cuts, the sting hurting more than anything else you’ve ever known before. sketchbooks run out of blank pages, journals get their lines filled, and all stories ultimately come to an end. just as how loving jay did.  

♡ after the breakup au masterlist // main masterlist // navi

[nishinini]

♡ 8 letters | ot7

au // after the breakup | the way that you stay — 8 letters 

“ if all it is is eight letters, why is it so hard to say? ” ~ 8 letters by why don’t we

[ still you ] — heeseung 

it was still you who heeseung thought about when he ate a bowl of ramen at three am. it was still you who had your own little place in heeseung’s heart. it was still you who he’d think of when he looked up at the stars during the night. it was still you who lived rent-free in his mind, still you who consumed his thoughts 24 hours at a time. it was still you who heeseung wanted to impress whether it was through his selcas or the way he dressed. heeseung was the ace of everything but regardless of what he did or how hard he tried, it was still you that he just couldn’t get over, still you that he loved.

[ come back ] — jay

jay wanted your side of the bed to be occupied again. jay wanted to wake up to your singing in the kitchen, you dressed in his shirt, and getting him to dance with you at an hour you should have been asleep. he despised the way the scent of your shampoo still lingered on his pillowcase despite the months you’ve been gone. he despised the way he couldn’t just toss out or burn the letters you gave to him, a constant reminder of what you once were. he despised the way the touch of your fingertips still lingered on his skin and he couldn’t do anything about it. he poured himself into work, did everything he could to try and take his mind off of you. yet despite knowing that you wouldn’t, jay hoped you’d come back.

[ we(’)re home ] — jake

some nights, jake would come home and you and layla would be out on a walk.

he’d wait at home, either order takeout or (attempt) to cook dinner. while he was in the kitchen getting ready, he’d hear your keys jingle, the door open, and always,

“we’re home!” would ring throughout his ears as you and layla came inside.

but tonight, layla and jake were home yet you weren’t here and it no longer felt like home.

[ sunshine ] — sunghoon

it was cliché, sunghoon knew. but so what? he was the ice prince and you were his sunshine. you broke your way into the ice walls around his heart, rebuilt them with windows to let the sun in. you were the warmth he had been desperately longing for his entire life, the warmth he used to lie and say he didn’t need. but he did. he needed your touch, your comfort, and your safety. your rays of sunlight were like magic to him, everything you touched practically turning to gold.

but things were different now, the ice refrozen. when sunlight meet ice, it burns it melts it and turns into a form entirely different from its original state. your warmth gone, his comfort zone disappearing, feeling of safety now nonexistent. your rays of sunlight only reminded him that they were shining somewhere else. you were his sunshine, but sunshine doesn’t always stay in one place for too long.

[ night sky ] — sunoo

sunoo shone brightly wherever he went. during the day, he was the sun, the only star that anyone could see. but you’ve always preferred the dark. you felt calmer when all the stars shone at night rather than just the one during the day. you preferred the night sky whereas sunoo was the human embodiment of day itself and maybe, just maybe, that was why things didn’t work out for you two. sunoo looks up at the night sky tonight and wondered if you were happy tonight.

[ my choice ] — jungwon

“this was my choice,” jungwon tells himself. you show up in front of him earlier than he expected, or maybe he was just never prepared for this to happen. regardless of which one it was, he couldn’t delay it any longer. he had two choices, this was the one decided on. he knew it was his fault for being careless. he knew he should’ve hidden it from the staff better. je knew he should’ve kept his mouth shut and denied it. but he didn’t, or was it that he couldn’t? didn’t or couldn’t, there was no difference anymore. jungwon’s heart feels heavy as he says the five final words,

“i’m breaking up with you.” he takes in the sight of you, your eyes nearing to tears, anger written all over your face, the hands that once held his now balled him into fists.

“is the company making you do this? to debut?” he hears you ask.

“it’s my choice,” jungwon whispers.

now jungwon looks into the audience of their performance, hundreds of thousands of people screaming their names, lightsticks glowing like stars. there it is again, the sinking feeling in his heart.

“this was my choice,” jungwon tells himself as he forces on a fake smile. he couldn’t help but wonder, was it the right now?

[ the times ] — ni-ki

the times you’d put a smile on Ni-ki’s face despite nearly annoying him to death. the times your embrace was home. the times you’d settle your head on his chest and make him feel complete as if you were his missing piece of the puzzle. the times you’d catch his eye in an audience of hundreds of people and give him the motivation to keep performing. the times you had his heart. the times you were ni-ki’s first kiss, first date, first love. the times that ni-ki hopelessly held onto were over now.

♡ main masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

♡ visions & memories | ot7

after the breakup | the five senses - sight

⤅ heeseung

if loving heeseung was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be steam coming off of rice rice. like heeseung, rice is versatile and goes with almost anything. fried, as is, in a clay pot, with meat, vegetables, even rice pudding as dessert. heeseung had the ability to go with and do anything that you wanted whether it was the dates that you stayed at home and lazed around or the dates that you dressed up and went out for dinner. but if you take rice as is, at its core and fresh out of the rice cooker in a bowl or on a plate steam comes off of it. the steam coming off of the rice feels almost comforting because you know that it’s hot and you’ll have a good meal as a result. but if you wait too long or leave it out, simply forgetting about your food or distracted by something else, the steam vanishes into the air and grows cold. much like steam coming off of rice, your love with heeseung eventually vanished into thin air and grew cold.

⤅ jay

if loving jay was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be fireworks in the night sky. it’s sudden and you often hear it before you see it, like jay’s constant “YAAAHH” that you heard daily. it’s full of sudden bursts of energy but it’s a sight you can’t help but appreciate. it captures you in awe and effort goes into making it look presentable. you get excited, can’t wait for it to start and continue. but at the same time, fireworks are over in a snap. they last for a few minutes, you take a couple of pictures and videos, then the show comes to an end. much like fireworks, despite the brief moments of happiness and excitement, loving jay was over so soon.

⤅ jake

if loving jake was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the sight of a dog’s tail wagging when they see you. whether you own one yourself or you simply come across one on the street, they tend to be friendly and just want some attention. like jake, you’re happy to seem them but they’re even happier to see you. friendly and outgoing, excited and ready to have some fun. how sad it is, that a dog’s entire life is their human but a dog only lasts for part of their human’s life.

⤅ sunghoon

if loving sunghoon was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the sight of snow in its entirety. snowflakes when fall from the sky, capturing you in a sort of bliss that can’t be replicated by anything or anyone else. the making snow angels where you’re freezing cold but the cold is worth it once you see the end product. snowball fights where the impact is sudden and icy and suddenly you’re looking for whoever threw it at you. but summer eventually came and melted it all away. much like snow, loving sunghoon melted faster than you wanted it to.

⤅ sunoo 

if loving sunoo was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the sight of flowers. they can be found anywhere and everywhere from the grass on the park to on display in windows. when given as gifts, there tends to be some thought behind them and contain a scent that regardless of who they’re given to, can draw out a smile in people. at the sight of flowers, your day gets just a little bit better. but flowers die eventually, wilting in a vase or stepped on in the grass, just like your and sunoo’s love did.  

⤅ jungwon

if loving jungwon was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the slight of a lit up candle. in a dark room, it provides a warmth you didn’t quite realize that you needed. instantly, it captures your attention, drawing you to it. there’s a sort of calmness the comes with the sight of a lit up candle, as its flame sways back and forth. jungwon was like that, the warmth that you needed. he captivated you and most of the time, you didn’t even realize it. but lit up candles, like love, die out and burn eventually. 

⤅ ni-ki

if loving ni-ki was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the sight waves crashing on the beach. most little kids have memories of going to the beach, going up to the waves, then running away from it when it chases you back. loving ni-ki was like that, you were each other’s first loves with a constant push and pull, coming and going. whether it was due to inexperience or out of fear, you didn’t know and perhaps you never will. the waves crash and return but it eventually gets too strong and reaches a point where you have run away and leave, much like what happened in your and ni-ki’s relationship. 

♡ main masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

♡ visions & memories | ot7

after the breakup | the five senses - sight

⤅ heeseung

if loving heeseung was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be steam coming off of rice rice. like heeseung, rice is versatile and goes with almost anything. fried, as is, in a clay pot, with meat, vegetables, even rice pudding as dessert. heeseung had the ability to go with and do anything that you wanted whether it was the dates that you stayed at home and lazed around or the dates that you dressed up and went out for dinner. but if you take rice as is, at its core and fresh out of the rice cooker in a bowl or on a plate steam comes off of it. the steam coming off of the rice feels almost comforting because you know that it’s hot and you’ll have a good meal as a result. but if you wait too long or leave it out, simply forgetting about your food or distracted by something else, the steam vanishes into the air and grows cold. much like steam coming off of rice, your love with heeseung eventually vanished into thin air and grew cold.

⤅ jay

if loving jay was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be fireworks in the night sky. it’s sudden and you often hear it before you see it, like jay’s constant “YAAAHH” that you heard daily. it’s full of sudden bursts of energy but it’s a sight you can’t help but appreciate. it captures you in awe and effort goes into making it look presentable. you get excited, can’t wait for it to start and continue. but at the same time, fireworks are over in a snap. they last for a few minutes, you take a couple of pictures and videos, then the show comes to an end. much like fireworks, despite the brief moments of happiness and excitement, loving jay was over so soon.

⤅ jake

if loving jake was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the sight of a dog’s tail wagging when they see you. whether you own one yourself or you simply come across one on the street, they tend to be friendly and just want some attention. like jake, you’re happy to seem them but they’re even happier to see you. friendly and outgoing, excited and ready to have some fun. how sad it is, that a dog’s entire life is their human but a dog only lasts for part of their human’s life.

⤅ sunghoon

if loving sunghoon was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the sight of snow in its entirety. snowflakes when fall from the sky, capturing you in a sort of bliss that can’t be replicated by anything or anyone else. the making snow angels where you’re freezing cold but the cold is worth it once you see the end product. snowball fights where the impact is sudden and icy and suddenly you’re looking for whoever threw it at you. but summer eventually came and melted it all away. much like snow, loving sunghoon melted faster than you wanted it to.

⤅ sunoo 

if loving sunoo was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the sight of flowers. they can be found anywhere and everywhere from the grass on the park to on display in windows. when given as gifts, there tends to be some thought behind them and contain a scent that regardless of who they’re given to, can draw out a smile in people. at the sight of flowers, your day gets just a little bit better. but flowers die eventually, wilting in a vase or stepped on in the grass, just like your and sunoo’s love did.  

⤅ jungwon

if loving jungwon was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the slight of a lit up candle. in a dark room, it provides a warmth you didn’t quite realize that you needed. instantly, it captures your attention, drawing you to it. there’s a sort of calmness the comes with the sight of a lit up candle, as its flame sways back and forth. jungwon was like that, the warmth that you needed. he captivated you and most of the time, you didn’t even realize it. but lit up candles, like love, die out and burn eventually. 

⤅ ni-ki

if loving ni-ki was to be described as something that you could see, it’d be the sight waves crashing on the beach. most little kids have memories of going to the beach, going up to the waves, then running away from it when it chases you back. loving ni-ki was like that, you were each other’s first loves with a constant push and pull, coming and going. whether it was due to inexperience or out of fear, you didn’t know and perhaps you never will. the waves crash and return but it eventually gets too strong and reaches a point where you have run away and leave, much like what happened in your and ni-ki’s relationship. 

♡ main masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

I LOVEE THE AFTER BREAKUP SERIES ! I legit got hurt every single time I CANNOT- YOUR WRITING IS SO AMAZING ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

ahh, thank you so much love !! i'm glad you like the series 🥺

[nishinini]

♡ in a rush | p.jay

⤅ au: after the breakup | the first hello - caffeine buzzed (3/3) ⤅ pairing: park sunghoon x reader ⤅ genre: fluff | drabble | cafe!au | angst if you squint ⤅ warnings: none ⤅ total word count: 650 ⤅ a/n: this is reposted !! ⤅ caffeine buzzed, the others: sunghoon | jake

You were always in a rush when it came to things. Your walk was always a few steps ahead of everyone else and everything just felt so slow in life. You sought the thrill of change, reveled in advancements and promotions. Caffeine was something that jump-started your day, if anything, you probably couldn’t live without it. You knew all the staff at the cafe you frequented and they knew you, after all, you had to be nice to the people giving you your daily caffeine fix. While standing in line as the second person to order, though, the only thing you actually had to do was pay since all the cashiers already knew your order.

“Your card has been denied, is there any way you can pay with cash?” the cashier, Ni-ki said just a little louder than he probably should have. You looked away from your phone and in front of you.

“I don’t have any cash,” the guy responded. Wanting your coffee, you went up to them,

“Here use this, I’ll pay for his and mine,” you said as you handed Ni-ki the punchcard.

“It’s fine, you don’t,” the guy said as he looked at you. Meeting his eyes, and nodding your head to the counter for drink pickups,

“It’s already made, so just take it it’d be a shame to let it go to waste don’t you think?” There were already two drinks there, the one that the guy probably ordered and your usual which Sunoo had made.

“How much do I owe you?” As Ni-ki punched a hole in the punchcard and gave you a new one after you had paid,

“Nothing, it’s free since I have a punchcard,” you replied with a smile. You went on with the rest of your day as you did per usual. It wasn’t until about the next week or two later that you saw the guy again. You were sitting in the cafe, waiting for a guy a friend of yours set you up with on a blind date. A cup of coffee was set on your table along with a pastry.

“This is for last time,” he said.

“It was free though.”

“Just take it, it’d be a shame to let it go to waste don’t you think?” You couldn’t help the smile that appeared on your face, after all, why would you refuse free coffee and a pastry added on top of that?

“Thanks.” You waited for half an hour, no more, no less until you called your friend to let her know that you had been stood up.

“The guy you set me up with wasted my time and stood me up,” you said when she answered. She told you that she’d try and talk to him to find out what happened but you told her not to bother since it wasn’t anything worth spending any more time on. What happened next was something you never quite expected. The guy from earlier sat across from you,

“You got stood up?” he asked.

“I guess I did.” It wasn’t the getting stood up part that angered you but it would have been better if he was honest and told you that he couldn’t make it or simply that he didn’t want to. After all, you had better things to do than just sitting around and wait for someone.

“Wanna make this a date with me then? I’m Jay by the way.” You weren’t expecting the guy, well Jay’s boldness but seeing as you were already here,

“Yeah, why not?” It was Jay’s boldness that initially drew you to him but it was his honesty that made you fall in love. You enjoyed going out with him, reveled in his warmth and support. But you were always in a rush when it came to things and somewhere down the line, Jay just couldn’t keep up with your pace.

♡ main masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

♡ distractions | s.jake

⤅ au: after the breakup | the first hello - caffeine buzzed (2/3) ⤅ pairing: park sunghoon x reader ⤅ genre: fluff | drabble | cafe!au | angst if you squint ⤅ warnings: none ⤅ total word count: 590 ⤅ a/n: this is reposted !! ⤅ caffeine buzzed, the others: sunghoon | jay

You were quite the sight when Jake first saw you in that cafe sitting at a table in the corner. Amidst all the chaos and chatters, somehow you had managed to catch his eye. Your laptop was in front of you paired with what seemed like hundreds of books and thousands of papers spread out all over the table. Your hair was tied in a messy bun, you had three cups of coffee, two of which were empty while the third was half-finished. Your fingers were typing furiously on the keyboard while you were muttering to yourself. The entire cafe was filled with your booth the only one with an open spot so it wouldn’t hurt to ask if he could sit across from you, right? Making his way to you,

“Hey,” he said. You looked up from your laptop, continuing to type as you responded, to the distraction. You didn’t like distractions.

“Hi?” It came out as more of a question than anything.

“Can I sit across from you?” You looked around the cafe and upon realizing that it was filled,

“Yeah, just uhh, move whatever’s in your way.” As Jake sat across from you only needing to slightly nudge a few books and papers, he got out his own laptop. While he tried to stay focused on his own work and having to study for his own upcoming finals, he couldn’t stop himself from glancing at you from time to time. You were so caught up in your work doing something different practically every second.

“How the hell do I do this?” he heard you mutter. Your laptop had now been shut and you were working on a worksheet of,

“Physics?” he asked. You looked up at him, eyes wide as if you had forgotten he was even here.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to bother you.”

“Naur, you’re good. I’m good at physics, I can help if you want?” A smile made itself known on your face,

“I like your accent,” you said. Neither of you knew exactly how long the two of you stayed at the table while Jake helped you with your physics review but what you did know was that it was a little too long due to how you two ended up being the last people there. You learned that Jake was easy to talk to and that it was easy to make him laugh, by the first meet you had learned that he was practically the human embodiment of a golden retriever. Despite having different classes and attending different schools, you and Jake had agreed to meet up at the cafe after school to study with each other until finals were over. During the times when Jake got there before you did, he would buy you a (non-caffeinated) drink and would say that despite just meeting you, he knew that you had already consumed enough caffeine to last an entire lifetime. When you’d get there first, you’d buy pastries for the both of you. It didn’t take Jake long to learn that you were focused on whatever your goal was and you weren’t about to let anything get in the way of it. You were focused on trying to get into a good college and didn’t like or tolerate distractions. While you and Jake got into a relationship for some time, he ended up as a distraction with how he often asked you out on dates his constant wanting to go out. You didn’t like distractions and Jake ended up being one of them.

♡ main masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

♡ hot chocolate & a table by the window

⤅ au: after the breakup | the first hello - caffeine buzzed (1/3) ⤅ pairing: park sunghoon x reader ⤅ genre: fluff | drabble | cafe!au | angst if you squint ⤅ warnings: none ⤅ total word count: 634 ⤅ a/n: this is reposted !! ⤅ caffeine buzzed, the others: jake | jay

Sunghoon remembers the first time he met you at Witch’s Brew three years ago. He remembered the sound of his feet walking on the snow fading from his ears, quickly replaced by the jingle of the door and his own mumbles. Cold temperatures weren’t new to Sunghoon with him having spent most of his childhood on the ice and all, but he would’ve preferred it if his hands were a little warmer and his stomach a little fuller. He had been complaining of the cold a lot lately.  He ordered a hot chocolate, passed by your table while making his way to the corner to wait for Jake and Jay. Seated by the corner, he had a view of most of the cafe and had noticed you sitting in the middle with your friends. Despite how it was freezing cold, he saw that you were drinking something iced.

“What kind of person drinks an iced drink when it’s snowing? “he thought to himself.

It was kind of weird to him, even he didn’t have that much of a tolerance to cold. While waiting for Jake and Jay to show up, he scrolled through his phone, occasionally taking sips of his hot chocolate. It was your laughter that drew his attention towards you. He watched the way your eyes lit up, heard it ringing throughout the cafe, and felt the sound sending flutters to his stomach despite having heard it for the first time in his life. When Jake and Jay came, he found himself glancing towards you occasionally. In doing this, he noticed some things. Like how you moved their drinks so that they wouldn’t get accidentally knocked over. The way you’d fiddle with the paper that your straw came in. Or how one of your friends would roll their eyes but ultimately smile at something that you said. When you and your friends were leaving, it just so happened that the 02z trio was too.

“Aren’t you guys cold?” Sunghoon asked, looking at both of his friends who shook their heads.

“You keep complaining about the cold, get a warmer jacket!” Jay said with a slight sigh.

“Here, take this,” Sunghoon heard from behind him. He turned around to be met with you… handing him a scarf? “You don’t have to return it, it’s ok,” you said.

“I’d feel bad, just taking it.”

“Really, I don’t mind.” He had never met you before but despite this, he felt as if he knew why you were drinking an iced drink despite the cold. The warmth of the world was radiating from you. You were friendly, even to someone like him.

“Your drink had ice in it, won’t you be cold?” he asked. Your head tilted to the side as you looked up at him.

“You know what kind of drink I had?” His eyes widened at the realization of what he had just admitted, noticing you. He cleared his throat, hand running through his hair as he did so.

“No...” You began to wrap the scarf around him and once finished,

“If you really wanna give me back my scarf, stop by here next Friday, around 7 maybe? You order your hot chocolate while I’ll order my iced drink, and maybe we can chat,” you said leaving and winking at him.

Witch’s Brew became your date place during the winters. Sunghoon preferred to sit at the corner but you preferred the center so the both of you comprised for a table by the window where you could enjoy each other’s presence as well as the view of snow. Today, snow has fallen and Sunghoon sits at the window seat drinking his hot chocolate. Despite how the heaters of the cafe were own, without you seated across from him, he feels colder than he ever has before.

♡ main masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

I really love the after the breakup series 🥰 your way of writing is amazing!

i'm glad you like it !! thank you 🥺

[nishinini]

♡ after the breakup au masterlist | scents that linger - food related his perspective

⤅ heeseung - coconuts

there was always so much pressure on heeseung to be the best at everything. the title of “ace” became one that gave more expectations than he initially expected. but despite all the stress, criticism, and constant questioning of whether or not he made the right choice, you were always there for him. your presence became the source of comfort the ace could let go in and he could just be lee heeseung. your hugs, those were his favorite. whenever he hugged you, he was instantly met with the scent of your coconut shampoo. whenever he kissed the top of your head, there was your coconut shampoo. before he went to sleep, he’d nuzzle his head in the crook of your neck, always met with your coconut shampoo. he never knew how much coconuts could mean to him. it was there when he woke up and there when he went to sleep. but today, he goes to sleep in a weight in his heart and thousands of thoughts running through his head. your coconut shampoo lingers on the fibers of his pillowcase but you weren’t here and he had no one to hug. 

⤅ jay - your favorite tea

the scent of your tea was one jay was all too familiar with. you needed it right when you woke up, a lesson he had learned early on during the beginning stages of the two of you living together. sometimes, you made a cup at 2 am needing it to function as you continued your work before falling asleep. the scent sometimes woke him up, causing him to ask you to come back to bed only for you to tell him that you were almost done. other times, despite the caffeine content, you’d make a cup before going to bed. one day, you had run out of the honey you typically used for your tea and asked jay if you could use him to which he responded, 

“you don’t need to ask, love. what’s mine is yours.” since then, you’d use his honey instead of the one you used to buy since it made the tea just a little sweeter. this led to constantly needing to make trips to the grocery store to refill that specific brand but neither of you quite minded. after moving out, you had left some of your tea bags behind. as much as he didn’t want to admit it, jay made a cup from time to time when he missed you. tonight, he uses the remaining drops of his honey on the last tea bag you left behind while closing his eyes as the scent hits his nose in hopes of feeling your presence with him.

⤅ jake - cookies in the oven 

you liked to bake, something that jake always supported. but you did it at the most weirdest and most random times. sometimes you’d bake right when you woke up and the two of you would have a savory pastry for breakfast. other times, you’d bake in the middle of the night instead of sleeping because you “felt like it.” jake loved the scent of cookies in the oven not caring if it woke him up because it was that good. but one night, he fell even more in love with you and he looked into the oven and saw something baking in the shape of bones.

“what are those?” he asked. 

“treats for layla. if she likes them, i'll bake more babe so we don't have to always buy them.” that night, the scent of cookies left an imprint on his heart upon the realization that you cared for layla just as much as he did, to the extent that you’d give her homemade dog treats. as layla eats the last treat you made just before leaving, jake can’t stop his tears slipping, can’t stop his mind clouding with thoughts of you, and can’t stop missing you. 

⤅ sunghoon - garlic 

garlic in the frying pan, a familiar scent for most people. it’s the first scent that hits you when you enter the kitchen, sometimes as early as your first step into the house. sunghoon has always loved the scent of garlic, reminding him of childhood meals and special dinners. when dating you, the scent of garlic took on a meaning different from his mother’s dishes and old home. the scent of garlic became accompanied with back hugs and constant teasing. it’d appear as a result of fried rice or sautéed vegetables, amongst other things in an effort to try and eat healthy for once. it became associated with endless laughter and failed attempts of trying new recipes since neither of you were actually chefs. he grew to love it more, found the scent reaching depths of his soul he was unaware even existed. the scent of garlic in the frying pan is lovely, but if neglected it can burn easily. 

⤅ sunoo - slightly burnt french toast 

french toast has always something sunoo’s enjoyed. one night, ingredients in the fridge were running low and ordering in wasn’t something that you didn’t want to do, so you decided to make french toast for you and sunoo’s dinner. while cooking, sunoo came into the kitchen. he distracted you through a multitude of ways which lead to burnt french toast filling the air. but while food was something sunoo held in high regards, he didn’t quite the slightly burnt french toast now in his stomach. french toast became a staple when you were around (typically for dinner) and he looked forward to it every time. tonight, he made french toast. he didn’t pay attention to it, too caught up in wondering what it’d be be like if you were here. the burnt smell filled the air, reminding him of how your love burned down and turned to ashes. 

⤅ jungwon - vanilla

for whatever reason, you loved vanilla. loved it in cakes. always chose it when going out for ice cream. tended to put just a little too much than you should’ve when baking cookies. the taste lingered on your lips when he’d kiss you, ice cream in the freezer and flavoring in the cupboard. he liked it, despite how vanilla was seen as boring, vanilla was uniquely you. jungwon learned that you were everything but vanilla. you were fun and spontaneous with a certain type of creativity he’d never seen in anyone else before. you were colorful and smiling, the better part of his day that he always looked forward to. but somewhere down the line, you started to see jungwon’s love as vanilla and there was nothing he could do to change it. 

⤅ ni-ki - strawberries

the scent of strawberries was on your lips since it was the flavor of the chapstick you always wore, one that he bought for you. but strawberries held a special place in his heart aside from that. you found it weird that ni-ki liked to microwave strawberries (as well as other things) and you didn’t hesitate to call him out or tease him about it. but despite your constant teasing, you’d always warm up a bowl of strawberries for him. when he heard the familiar sound of the microwave running and the scent of strawberries filling the air, his heart would beat a little faster and in the bottom of his stomach he could feel the same warmth a person felt while rested by a campfire. the scent of strawberries meant your presence was nearby. but today, as the scent of strawberries fills in the air mixed in with the sound of the microwave running, his heart sinks to the bottom of the pacific ocean while the bottom of his stomach feels as if it were in antarctica. the scent of strawberries now meant you were gone.

♡ main masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

♡ after the breakup au masterlist | butterflies

⤅ heeseung:

butterflies. a word heeseung never really knew he could feel. but as you crept his way into his heart, your love breaking down his walls and building windows along the way, he realized something. butterflies couldn’t do it justice. butterflies couldn’t describe your irreplaceable warmth that despite living in a world full of billions if people, no one else would be able to replicate. butterflies weren’t enough to explain the fleeting feeling that coursed throughout his body as he held your hand, the both of your fingers intertwined for what he hoped to be forever. butterflies couldn’t do it justice but he settled for that word. 

the butterflies you once gave him used to do somersaults in his stomach. now, they’ve traveled up his throat and choked him.

♡ blog masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

 ♡ after the breakup au masterlist | it’s over

⤅ jake

jake was doing some cleaning today, as if the cleaning would somehow erase your presence in the house but that didn’t work. he thought about you while cleaning the kitchen, the scent of cookies lingering on. he thought about you while cleaning the dining room, wondering if he’d one day be able to pull back your chair for you again. he thought about you when his eyes met the coat stand at the entrance of the house, an empty hook waiting for your jacket to occupy it. while cleaning up the closet of what once was the room you two shared together, he found an old shirt of yours, it used to be your favorite one. he called you about it wondering if you wanted to drop by and pick it up or if you preferred he dropped it off. but instead,

“just toss it out or donate it, jae.” jae you called him, he had missed hearing that from you. he couldn’t bring himself to toss it out. couldn’t bear the thought of someone else buying it or wearing it. when jake wasn’t looking, layla managed to get a hold of the shirt and brought it to her bed. jake looked at layla nuzzled up in your shirt trying to inhale the remainder of your scent. patting her head, his hand feeling heavy,

“it’s over,” he whispered.

♡ blog masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

♡ after the breakup au masterlist  | why isn’t the sun bright anymore? (sunoo focused)

⤅ sunoo

ever since you’ve been gone, a question lingers in the back of sunoo’s mind. he wakes up feeling as if the sun has dimmed and is now blocked with the curtains of regret. sometimes the question appears right when he wakes up other times it pops up throughout the day when he leasts expects it. he missed you, how could he not when you were the reason for his smile? he was the sunshine for thousands if not millions of people but you were the sunshine for him. he remembers the softness of your hair meeting the tips of his fingers when you’d let him style it to your liking. he remembers the way your eyes would widen each time he’d introduce you to a new restaurant. he remembers how you’d cheer for him and send him texts whenever he had a busy schedule. 

he wakes up today, telling himself that it’ll be ok. he walks out today, seeing that the sun has risen. he checks his phone, seeing the glare of its light on the screen. yet he asks himself, 

“why isn’t the sun bright anymore?”

♡ blog masterlist || navi

[nishinini]

♡ after the breakup | sounds in the house (his perspective) ot7

⤅ heeseung:

there is a sound, that if heeseung closes his eyes, he can hear it distinctly. at 2 am, the two of you are awake messing around in the kitchen while water boils in a pot. when it’s ready and you’ve put the ramen in the pot, you place the lid over it. that sound. it’s quick, almost hollow as it makes itself known to his ears. the sound of the lid over the pot of boiling ramen. he never thought much of it at first, figured that it wasn’t a big deal. but as he places the lid over the pot now, he can’t help but wonder what it’d be like if you were here.

⤅ jay

jay was sometimes annoyed by the squeaky sound of the oven door opening while he prepared dinner for you both. you always found yourself sneaking into the kitchen to bake while he cooked and while he enjoyed your presence, he hated the oven door squeaking in his ears. your routine was fairly simple, he cooked dinner, you baked dessert, and clean up was done together. after all, relationships were give and take. the oven door never got fixed while the two of you were together. yet as he watches the workers take out the old oven of his apartment and replace it with a newer and more modernized version, his heart can’t help but sink a little.

⤅ jake

at dinner, jake would pull back your chair for you like the gentleman he’s always been. most nights, it’d earn him a light blush and a roll of your eyes as you’d tell him that you could pull back your own chair. the chair’s legs would move against the hardwood floors, a sound that’d be awkward in a restaurant but one that neither of you quite minded as it was only you both at home. now, as jake sits alone at the table looking across from him to be met with an empty chair he can’t help but wonder if someone was pulling your chair back for you tonight.

⤅ sunghoon

no matter how quiet you tried to be while the two of you watched a movie, the sound of the microwave while the popcorn is popping seems to echo louder than thunder regardless of how far the kitchen is from the living room. when you and sunghoon had movie nights, you found yourself wanting another batch of popcorn and had to make it halfway through the movie. now, as sunghoon puts on what once was the movie the two of you always watched together, his hand meets an empty popcorn bowl but he can’t bring himself to get up and make another batch.

⤅ sunoo

sunoo has always loved food. but the process of laying it out on the table and getting ready to eat is something sunoo has grown to love with you in the mix. when the both of you set the table, the plates making a slight “clunk” on the table. the sound often went unnoticed by sunoo as he was just excited to eat with you. but now, as he sets the table to eat alone and the bottom of the plates meet the surface of the table, he can’t help but wish you were here.

⤅ jungwon

cuddles with you while a tv show plays have always felt so right. the way you’d settle in next to jungwon, rest your head on his shoulder, and settle your arm around his waist made him feel like the two of you were two pieces of a thousand piece puzzle that somehow found each other. when you’d sit on the couch next to him, it always made a squeaking sound that alerted him of your presence. the two of you always said that you’d get a new couch at ikea one day, one that wouldn’t squeak or make any sounds. now, jungwon looks at all the couches on display but he just can’t bring himself to test one of them out.

⤅ ni-ki (read this drabble before reading this part for slightly more angst but you don’t have to ofc !!)

whenever you’d wake ni-ki up for the day, you’d shake him gently which resulted in him aware that he needed to get up but made no effort to do so. what truly got him awake was when you’d get out of bed and turn on the lights to which you’d be met with a very annoyed ni-ki that just wanted a few more minutes or sleep. the click of the switch was one that he grew to despise, it resulted in returning to reality and caused you to leave his embrace. yet at the same time it granted him another day with you. it’s his alarm he could never bring himself to turn off. he hears that familiar click, his heart slightly sklpping a beat. yet he realizes by returning to reality you’ve left his embrace, only today, he didn’t have another day with you.

[nishinini]

♡ after the breakup | his warmth (your perspective)

⤅ heeseung:

washing dishes. your hands start off cold and your body is tired. but as the water continues to heat up, you can feel the tension in your muscles loosen slightly. you’re aware of how tired you are as you stand by the sink but it’s almost calming. when it’s over, you pat your hands dry with a towel. yet the warmth from the water lingers on the tips of your fingers and the palm of your hands. you relish in it in the brief moments that it lasts. heeseung’s warmth is similar to the warmth one feels while washing dishes. but you’ve always thought of dishes as your least favorite chore. 

⤅ jay

settled by a campfire. it comes face-paced, removing the cold all the way from your toes to your face within a matter of seconds. sometimes, you dare get a little closer than usual but you pull away instantly because it’ll burn. from a distance, you’re satisfied. it lasts for as long as you need it to, the fire fueled with the wood of care as you can see the embers of love spread throughout the air. jay’s warmth is similar to the warmth one feels when settled by a campfire. but campfires always die out by the morning. 

⤅ jake

a jacket. it drapes over your shoulders, encases your back and entraps your arms as it spreads all over your body. you can’t help but appreciate the way it feels and how comforting it is when it’s there. it’s constant, a part of routine, and always there. on a cold winter day, it has the capability to warm the depths of your heart. on a hot summer day, it stays loosely wrapped around your waist. jake’s warmth is similar to the warmth one feels with a jacket over them. but you’ve always been too stubborn to bring a jacket with you when you go out. 

⤅ sunghoon

hot chocolate. it first coats the roof of your mouth, settles in your tongue, then goes down your throat. you can feel it going down your body and settling in your stomach next to the slight burst of happiness you feel. you can’t help but want another sip after the first one, slowly it becomes addicting. it becomes something that you crave as a source of comfort. sunghoon’s warmth is similar to hot chocolate settling in the pit of your stomach. but the cup of hot chocolate stays half-finished on the table and has now grown cold. 

⤅ sunoo

the sun. it hits your face when you leave the house. comes in rays on the beach. you can feel it settle on your face down to your shoulders. everyone craves it, some wear a hat in an effort to control it. you can’t help but appreciate it while you sit outside a cafe enjoying a drink while reading a book. it seems to entrance you but you can never look directly at it for too long or you’ll lose your sight so you settle for its feel. sunoo’s warmth is similar to the sun during the day. but you’ve always preferred to go out during the night.

⤅ jungwon

a warm cup. whether it’s from a cup of coffee or a cup of tea, when the tips of your fingers wrap around it, the warmth stays and feels almost safe. when you bring cup to your face, the steam hits and it’s almost comforting, a mini sauna of sorts. you feel relaxed, you can loose yourself in it amidst all the chaos in your life. jungwon’s warmth is similar to a warm cup. but you’ve always preferred your drinks iced. 

⤅ ni-ki

freshly made chocolate chip cookies. as you grab it fresh off the tray, the warmth slightly burns the tip of your fingers and you make attempts to cool it instantly by blowing on it. after taking a bite, you can feel it deep in your soul. the taste almost reassures you due to how familiar it is. it’s almost childish, but a constant go-to that you’re luck to have. ni-ki’s warmth is similar to freshly made chocolate chip cookies. but you’ve always had more of a savory tooth than a sweet one. 

⤅ a/n: i honestly have no idea if any of these made sense ngl

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