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{Gonna be on sometime this week. Hopefully.}

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👀 you're gonna break my heart with this anyway so yolo

what's he say when she's not there?

"i. . . i don't know what to do." tom admitted. he felt helpless, something he truly had grown to hate but what was he to do? it wasn't like he could ban her from his store because she made him feel things.

apollo was watching curiously, perhaps the only one in the little town that remembered what the werecritter was like before-- too young and too deep in love. he could swear he saw some of the person tom used to be, a glimmer of him anyway.

"she's cute but i barely know her." was tom really trying to talk himself out of this. "she's making me feel things. . ."

isabelle's words kept going through his head. do you want to date her? what's holding you back?

"things i haven't felt since the twins' mother. . ." god, tom could still recall that crush with vivid clarity. the smiles, the jokes, the way she made his heart pound and how happy she made him. it was so innocent. but he wasn't the same person he was back then, now was he? so why was he feeling this way? "she's too good to be involved in this life. i can't drag her down into this too."

"but you still want her." apollo murmured.

a pause. "i do. . . so, what do i do?"

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send me ‘👀’ for something my muse has said about yours to someone else / when they’re not around.

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look, i’m a nice person, but i’m not here to take your shit.

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matthew daddario for people magazine

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where’s my oscar for acting like i’m not falling apart 

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If you lost my muse in a crowd, what “offensive” thing could you yell that'd be GUARANTEED to track them down?

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is “no” an emotion because i feel it

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*   —  —   VERY SERIOUS RIP VINE SENTENCE STARTERS

‘  when will you learn? when will you learn that your actionS HAVE CONSEQUENCES!  ’ ‘  can i get a waffle??? can i PLEASE get a waffle!!!  ’ ‘  go suck a dick, suck a dick suck a motherfucking dick  ’ ‘  you better stop! biTCH STOP  ’ ‘  do you ever like wake up and do something and you’re just like what the hec– fuck is goin on  ’ ‘  what’s good, brah you don’t know me! you don’t– WHAT IS GOOD! YOU DON’T KNOW! YOU DON’T KNOW ME! ’ ‘  it’s summer i got my hat on backwards and it’s time to fucking party  ’ ‘  anyone ever tell you you look like beyonce?  ’ ‘  I LOVE YOU, BITCH. I AIN’T EVER GONNA STOP LOVING YOU BITCH  ’ ‘  BITCH I HOPE THE FUCK YOU DO YOU’LL BE A DEAD SON OF A BITCH, I TELL YOU THAT  ’ ‘  and they were roommates!  ’ ‘  oh my god, they were roommates  ’ ‘  oh my god, i love chipotle chipotle is my liiiiife   ’ ‘  this bitch empty YEET!!!!  ’ ‘  WHERE ARE THOOOOOSE  ’ ‘  THEY ARE MY CROCS  ’ ‘  bitch disgusting  ’ ‘  yeaaah. yeAAAAAH.  ’ ‘  so no head?  ’ ‘  THIS IS WHY MOM DOESN’T FUCKING LOVE YOU!  ’ ‘  i’ll kill you. i’ll kill you. i’m not even worried about it.  ’ ‘  ahh, fuck. i can’t believe you’ve done this  ’ ‘  aHH STOP! i could’ve dropped my croissant!  ’ ‘  what’s up me and my boys are going to see uncle kracker  ’ ‘  give me my hat back, jordan!  ’ ‘  do you wanna go see uncle kracker or no!?  ’ ‘  i sneezed! oh, i’m not allowed to sneeze?!  ’ ‘  look at all those chickens  ’ ‘  i smell like beef  ’ ‘  i gotta go home cause i forgot to… vacuum my room  ’ ‘  actually, megan, i can’t sit anywhere. i have hemorrhoids.  ’ ‘  is there anything better than pussy? yes! a really good book  ’ ‘  mom, i’m peein on myself  ’ ‘  sorry, i’m on the toilet. i hope the ice cream don’t melt, bitch  ’ ‘  honestly i don’t remember, i was probably fucked up. yeah, i was crazy back then  ’ ‘  I WON’T HESITATE, BITCH!  ’ ‘  just shut up and die slowly, okay?  ’ ‘  two bros chillin in a hot tub five feet apart cause they’re not gay!  ’ ‘  mother trucker, dude! that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick!  ’ ‘  i said WHOEVER THREW THAT PAPER, YOUR MOMS A HO  ’ ‘  you remember one time i liked you? GOOD! cause it never happened  ’ ‘  if your name is junior and you’re really handsome, come on raise your hand  ’ ‘  i’M WASHIN ME AND MY CLOTHES, BITCH! I’M WASHING ME AND MY CLOTHES  ’ ‘  waddup i’m jared, i’m nineteen, and i never fucking learned how to read  ’ ‘  whAT THE FUCK IS UP, KYLE? NO WHAT’D YOU SAY? WHAT THE FUCK, DUDE! STEP THE FUCK UP KYLE  ’ ‘  oh my god why can’t you just take the fricken compliMENT  ’ ‘  is that a wEED? i’m callin the police!!!  ’ ‘  yo, drink this vodka down the hatch c’mon  ’ ‘  it is wednesday, my dudes. aaaaAAAAAAH  ’ ‘  there is only one thing worst than a rapist… a child!  ’ ‘  get to del taco, they got a new thing called fre shavocado  ’ ‘  *to the tune of ghostbusters* i’m an adult virgin  ’ ‘  hi my name is tre, i have a basketball game tomorrooooow  ’ ‘  babeyou’reafuckingbitchiwantyoutogetthefuckoutofmycarcauseiwannabreakupwithyou i fucking hate you   ’ ‘  todays forecast we can clearly see that somebody got me fucked up. FUCKED. UP.  ’ ‘  whAT’S UP FUCKERS  ’ ‘  FUCK YOU, THAT’S WHY  ’ ‘  he needs some milk!  ’ ‘  you are my dad. YOU’RE MY DAD! boogie woogie woogie  ’ ‘  yEAH NO SHIT, HONEY  ’ ‘  oooooh my boy going to prom. fuck it up! fuck it up! fuck it up!  ’ ‘  hey, how you doin? i’m doing just fine. i lied. i’m dying inside  ’ ‘  honey, you got a big storm comin  ’ ‘  i wanna fucking DIE  ’ ‘  road work ahead? uh yeah i sure hope it does  ’ ‘  the yo-yo master did not answer, he just kept on yo-ing  ’ ‘  welcome back to me screaming  ’ ‘  you know sometimes i think to myself what are you waiting for you dumb stupid fuuuuuuck!  ’ ‘  do you ever shut the fuck up?  ’

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new tag game: what is your college major and what do people say when you tell them what you’re studying

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"i'm not sad, i'm just cutting cucumbers."

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Manip of Nina Dobrev and Matthew Daddario. One has an extra psd on it because why not. @matthewdaaddario

Please like or reblog if you plan on using it! 

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mood: Christine Teigen getting angry at Animal Crossing

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she's just going to quietly murmur, "be careful with that one, love. he will do what it takes to survive."

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The Nightmare Before Christmas Liveblogging Sentence Starters

Feel free to change pronouns. Warning: Some may be NSFW/offensive

“Local Man goes through midlife crisis and almost ruins everyone’s lives.”

“He has a fucking weird kink. You know its bad if I think its weird. ”

“He called him Daddy…. does everyone have a daddy kink now?”

“This… this is just too many fucking songs.”

“Didn’t you just finish singing a song? Now you’re singing a solo???”

“Who the fuck has a crisis in a cemetery? Respect the dead fucktard.”

“Stalking someone you love is STILL STALKING.”

“HOW ARE YOU IN LOVE? Have you guys even talked before this?”

“Real question: why are his legs so long?”

“I’d sleep with him, but hear me out before you judge me.”

“Fuck that guy in Kentucky I guess?”

“Let me just start whining about no one understanding me meanwhile I told everyone to fuck off. GREAT STRATEGY.”

“LITERALLY EVERYONE LOVES AND WANTS TO HELP YOU ASSHOLE!”

“Can we talk about how she could have murdered him?”

“I hate these inpatient assholes.”

“ITS LITERALLY THE DAY AFTER. GIVE HIM A DAY OFF???”

“Well at least he knows he’s useless.”

“Someone adoring and caring about you so much that they worry for you? Sounds fake…”

“I don’t know how long you lived there, but I’m pretty sure you should have noticed that FUCKING WEIRD DOOR.”

“OH NO. ANOTHER SOLO? HOW MANY DO YOU KNOW?”

“This can’t be improv. It had to be practiced and that’s sad.”

“Is no one is concerned that SATAN lives in your town?”

“OH GOD. A CLOWN? Oh fuck this town.”

“Do you not have anything to do besides being stalking him? What are you a 12 year old?”

“Who invited you, Satan?”

“My present is ugly??? Have you seen your face? Fucking rude. Who even asked for your opinion?”

“HOW HAS NO ONE CALLED HIM OUT ON THIS BULLSHIT ALREADY?”

“He got lost in the woods for like days and comes back saying some crazy shit. In my day, we’d burn someone at the stake for that.”

“Lying to get what you want is the DEFINITION of manipulation you dramatic fuck.”

“You can’t be dark and mysterious while going through a midlife crisis!”

“Poisoned? You look like you have a hangover.”

“Reading one book doesn’t make you a professional.”

“This stuff is all stolen. You didn’t make that. Don’t lie to me.”

“You’d understand that reaction if you were A SCIENTIST! Not some random asshole doing experiments in their basement! That’s how Breaking Bad started!”

“Credit where it’s due: she’s dedicated to getting some dick.”

“I can’t believe you gave him a present and just ran away. This isn’t a manga!”

“HOW DID THE CHRISTMAS TREE CATCH ON FIRE? LITERALLY. HOW?”

“DON’T SLEEP OUTSIDE HIS HOUSE! YOU’LL LOOK LIKE STALKER!”

“You’re worried about him, but have you tried actually asking if he’s okay?”

“All you did was say ‘I don’t understand, fuck it though I do what I want.’ And that’s not science.”

“Why are you giving the most important job to children?”

“They practically worship Satan and you tell them not to involve him. It’s really your fault for trusting them.”

“See… usually… smart people don’t shout out their plans for kidnapping in public.”

“All these plans for ‘kidnapping’ will literally end up in death. Just needed to call you out on this.”

“This whole problem could have been avoided with an ol’ fashion blowjob.”

“He should be working, but instead he’s looking for a girlfriend. Amazing.”

“Sabotaging the love of your life so he doesn’t make a fool of himself… true love.”

“Oh god. That cat could have fleas. Don’t pet it!”

“Why did you touch it! IT WAS IN THE GARBAGE!”

“Your whole problem is you couldn’t tell him you wanted to sleep with him.”

“This song was literally me in high school. Lonely, but still fucking thirsty.”

“I know he’s gross and evil, but I love him.”

“Side note: look at his ass! THICCCC.”  

“This whole plan revolved around him having a fetish that you’re not entirely sure he has.”

“I don’t care how goth you are, don’t ever give me a skull for Christmas OR Halloween.”

“He even falls unconscious dramatically. Why is he like this?”

“How can you love someone so dramatic and whiny, [Insert Name]?”

“Nobody understands… okay, but you lied, manipulated, and almost got everyone killed.”

“You have Satan and the Boogie Man in your town… how is anyone surprised that bad things happen. You knew what you were getting yourself into moving there.”

“You went on an entire quest just because you were bored.”

“He just replaced her and no one gave a fuck!”

“Dearest friend? When have you EVER hung out before this shit show started?”

“Stop kissing in the snow! You guys are going to get hypothermia or some shit.”