norequestimagines - Tumblr blog

[norequestimagines]

Safeguard [Pt. 3]

A/N; WHAT’S UP MOTHER FUCKERS, IT’S FINALLY HERE.I am genuinely so sorry this took as long as it did. I couldn't get the ending quite right. I suck at ending things. I just feel like it’s cheesy and not as tied up as I’d like but I hope y’all like it. Please let me know! CC is always welcome. 

trigger warning: arguing?

A soft yellow haze filled the room while the sun rose, shining through the window. I stretched and rolled over, my heart dropping when I realized Josh was gone, but my hope was quickly restored when I  saw the steaming mug full of coffee on the nightstand next to me. Soft metal- on-metal noises could be heard coming from the kitchen.

Josh stood at the stove, turning bacon with a fork and attempting to scramble eggs with a wooden spoon in his non-dominant hand. He’d jump when the bacon fat popped, splattering onto his bare abdomen.

“It doesn’t hurt if you’ve got a shirt on.” I giggled from the bottom of the staircase. 

He turned to smile at me before turning back to the bacon. “I didn’t hear you complaining about me being shirtless last night.”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong, I’m definitely not complaining. Though, I might complain about the egg puck and burned bacon you’re working on, there.”

“Yeah… I was going for a whole thing here but I don’t think I have a future as a chef.” He grumbled, placing his hands on his hips and scowling at his failed attempt at a breakfast. 

“Grab some more eggs, you can focus on the bacon. Just make sure you start with the pan cold, Gordon Ramsay.” I giggled, placing my coffee on the counter before starting to crack eggs and whisk them into a froth. 

It was easy. He asked questions about how I beat the eggs and how I got them so fluffy. I danced around him to place bread in the toaster and pour us both more coffee before returning to stir the eggs, ensuring that they didn’t burn. Laughing at his childlike wonder at my (rather basic) cooking skills, it was hard not to feel some sense of melancholy. It was always so easy with him. There was no stress and no overthinking because everything always just worked. And even now, as we made breakfast together while being broken up and having jus had sex the night prior, it felt right. 

We ate at the table outside, taking in the early morning sun. He didn’t ruin the second batch of bacon, nor did he make breakfast uncomfortable. We kept the conversation light, joking about his being completely hopeless in the kitchen. Neither of us came back to reality until he told me I had no idea how beautiful I was. 

“Josh, you can’t just-” My gaze fell to my plate; suddenly my fork pushing my eggs around was incredibly interesting. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean...” His voice trailed off and I refused to look back at him, instead turning my eyes towards the horizon. Our place overlooked a few acres of land and mornings here were always my favorite. 

Suddenly, this morning wasn’t so easy. 

“Thank you, Josh, for everything. But I uh, I should really get going.”

Standing before he could say anything, I stood and walked quickly into the house. I could hear him hot on my heels. 

“Kara, wait! Kar, please, just- Kara!” He grabbed my wrist as my foot hit the second stair, putting me a few inches above him. “Can we please just talk about last night?” 

I chewed my lip and mulled it over. Deciding I may as well get it over with, I met his eyes and took a deep breath. “Let’s sit down, yeah?” 

A flicker of a smile passed on Josh’s lips before he lead me to the living room, his fingers locking with mine. We sat on the couch, right next to each other, in the most uncomfortable silence I’d ever been a part of. 

“So last ni-”

“What happ-” 

We laughed and I insisted he go first. 

“Last night… What uh; I mean I wanted to be here for you in whatever way you needed, but I just… wasn’t expecting that to happen. Like, at all. And don’t get me wrong, it was great! I just don’t want you to feel like you owe me for what I did or like-” Josh rambled when he was out of his element. I’d always found it endearing. 

“Last night, I was vulnerable and scared and I just wanted to feel safe. I wanted to feel at home, you know? And I didn’t come to the guest room with the intent on that, but it just felt so…” “So normal.” He finished for me.

“SO normal! I’d had a horrible night and all I wanted was you.” 

Josh stayed silent, electing to grin shyly at me before picking at a stray thread on his sweats.  I took a few moments to take him in, the silence now comfortable. I missed staring into his ocean blue eyes over dinner. The feeling of his rough hands against my scalp after a hard day. I missed arguing over whether or not he should cut his hair and going out to breakfast when we both had a morning off. He was the only thing in Ohio that felt like home and I felt so lost without him. 

“What happened, Josh?” I whispered, not trusting my voice to be any stronger. “Why did we break up?” My eyes met his and he looked as if he’d just kicked a puppy. “ I mean I know why, but I don’t… Things didn’t happen the way you think they happened.”

“I know.” His voice was raspy, tears lining his waterline. 

“You know? You know?! So you did read the letter and you never even called?” I stared at him in awe. 

“No, that’s not… Kara, please, just let me explain my side.”

I stayed silent, nodding for him to continue.

“When I saw his instagram, I just freaked. The guys offered to buy me a few drinks, try to get my mind off of it. But the more I drank the more pissed I got. So I came home hot headed and drunk and I handled everything all wrong. I should’ve asked you what was going on. And I should’ve listened to you when you tried to tell me. I was just so wrapped up in my own head. In how hurt I was. How insecure I was. I thought it was best for both of us if I let you go.” 

“Insecure?” Josh was a professional athlete, in a town full of people who worshipped him. Girls threw themselves at him every time we went out whether it was just the two of us or with the whole team. What did he have to be insecure about?

“Yeah, I uh, I’ve always been intimidated by you. Remember when we met, and I didn’t actually ask you out for weeks? It’s because I couldn’t imagine a girl like you wanting to be with somebody like me. You graduated college at the top of your class. You don’t take shit from anybody. You can outdrink half the team and they all fucking adore you. I’m just some dumb jock who got lucky. And I know you’ve been wanting to take the next step. I can see your face when our friends get engaged and have kids and I can’t give you that right now. It wouldn't be fair to you or our kids for me to be away all the time, or to have to move around if I get traded. I want those things with you, Kar, but I can’t ask you to keep waiting around for me.” He scoffs, looking at the ceiling, willing himself not to cry. I grab him hand to stop him from ripping a hole in his sweats. His hands grasps mine tightly and he smiles at me sadly, a tear running down his face. “So then I see pictures of you with this guy, and you looked so happy, I just thought… I figured you found someone who could give you what I can’t yet, and I panicked. Once you left and I read that letter, I felt more stupid than I ever had in my entire life. I went back and looked at the pictures again and realized how different you looked. How sad your eyes were. I knew you were telling the truth. And then Boone told me about the court shit and I couldn’t face you. I let you go through all of that alone. You deserve so much better than that. You deserve the wedding you’ve always wanted, and the kids I’m sure you already have names picked out for. You deserve someone who can give you the world.”

I kept a hold of his hand as I turned to him, wiping tears from his cheeks with my free hand and tears of my own flowed down my face. “Josh, you are my world.” I choked out.  “I want to get married to you. I want your kids and I want our life. No other man could ever be enough for me.” 

Josh released a sob before wrapping his arms around me, pulling me to straddle his lap and burying his face in my neck. It felt incredible to be surrounded by him again. “I’m so fucking sorry, baby.” We both cried for a moment, just taking one another in. “What can I do?” He mumbled again. I felt him lean away from me, placing his large hands on either side of my face, lifting it to meet his. Our eyes locked and I choked out another sob.  “Tell me how to fix this. Tell me what to do, sweetheart, please, I-”

I rested my forehead against his and closed my eyes, silently praying to anyone who might be listening for some clarity . “ I don’t know, Josh. I don’t know what to do, either. I needed you to listen to me and you wouldn’t. I needed you to be there and you weren’t. How am I supposed to trust you again?” 

His hands moved down, one to hold my waist and one to rub large, comforting circles on my back.. “I’ve seen my life without you and I never want to live that way again. I’ll do whatever it takes to make this up to you. You say the word and it’s done. Please just come back home.” Josh whimpered and I could feel my heart breaking for him.

The past few months flashed before me. The sleepless nights in an empty apartment. Boone bringing takeout to my place because he knew I was too down to cook for myself. Feeling completely lost without Josh to share my life with. I knew he and I weren’t ready for marriage and kids yet but I couldn’t imagine having any of that with anyone else. 

“Don’t you ever let me go again.” 

In an instant, Josh’s arms were squeezing my body against his.  Neither of us spoke a word. After spending months apart and then having such an emotional roller coaster of the past 12 hours, we chose instead to take each other in. I could see the freckles that spread across his shoulders like constellations in the night sky. I could feel him wrapped around me, strong and steady. It’d been months and now that I could hear his heartbeat and smell his body wash and be with him, I finally felt safe. We had a lot of work to do. Our relationship would have to be rebuilt, a little at a time. But for now, we were together, and that was enough. 

[norequestimagines]

Hello, all!

I’ve had a lot more love on Safeguard than I anticipated and wanted to say thank you all so much!

I was working on a part 3 when I had a death in the family and I completely stopped writing for a bit in order to mourn and grieve. I’m doing much better now and will begin working on part 3 again. Hopefully it’s up sooner than later!

Thank you again for all the support ♥️

[norequestimagines]

Safeguard [Pt. 2]

TW: domestic violence, smut

Thank you all for all the love on part one! Please go easy on me here, it’s my first time writing smut of any kind and it’s not very detailed. I tried lmao I hope y’all enjoy!

Josh helped my shaky body into the front seat of his truck before running around and getting in on the other side. The drive was quiet. I just didn’t know what to say. Being in his truck again felt like home and so uncomfortable simultaneously. There was so much left unsaid between us after the breakup, and now that such an emotional bomb had gone off, I just felt… overwhelmed. 

“Hey, me again. I’m not mad or anything, Josh, I just want to make sure you’re okay. You said you’d be home at 7; it’s 9 now and I haven’t heard a thing from you or any of the guys… Kinda starting to freak out, here. I love you, okay? I hope you’re home soon.” 

I’d texted him three times, called twice, and left one voicemail. Josh was forgetful, sure, but he wasn’t one to leave me waiting up with no explanation. He always shot me a quick “heading out with Seth and Boone, be home late!” text or at the very least had one of his buddies let me know, in the event his phone died or he left it at the arena. He’s never left me hanging like this before, and especially not on a night like tonight; our three year anniversary. 

We’d agreed to do something low key this year. The past two years had been big nights out but both of us had been so busy with work we just wanted to take some time for a night in. I’d ordered food from our favorite restaurant and made sure the house had a relaxing, romantic but low key ambiance to it. Way too much time was spent perfecting my hair into beach waves. My outfit was simple; distressed skinny jeans and a chunky white cardigan. He’d said more than once that even though I looked incredible in a gown for his charity events and award ceremonies, that his favorite thing to see me in was an outfit like this, because it’s what he wants to come home to for the rest of his life. I just wish he’d come home now. 

As I began to pack the food away, too sick with worry to eat any of it, my anxious mind began to wander. I started to put everything in the fridge and imagined all the terrible things that could’ve happened. What if he got into a car accident? Or he forgot to tell me he was going out with the guys and got into a bar fight and got arrested? What if he just completely forgot about tonight altogether? No, Josh would never forget our anniversary. But if he didn’t forget, he must be in jail or the hospital. 

Attempting (and failing) to keep myself too busy to worry, I was folding laundry when I heard a door open and shut. 

“Josh?!” I leapt out of my seat and ran to the living room where my boyfriend (who appeared safe and healthy and un-incarcerated) stood, hanging his jacket on the coat rack. 

“Hey.” he muttered, not even looking up to face me. 

I furrowed my brows, confused by the way he was acting. He was like this after a bad game sometimes but they didn’t have a game at all today. “Are you okay? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you; you had me worried, honey.”

“M’fine. Gonna go take a shower.” He trudged up the stairs and I figured it best to give him some space before prying. 

Once I heard the shower shut off, I made my way upstairs to try to unpack whatever was weighing him down. He was sitting on his side of the bed in a pair of sweats, facing our bedroom window with his head held in his hands.

“You want to talk about it?” I asked, my voice just above a whisper.

“No.” 

I wasn’t really sure where to go from here. Josh was never this cold with me. I slowly made my way to the bed, crawling to sit behind him before wrapping both my legs and arms around his middle. 

“Where were you, baby? I was so worried.”

“Can I just have ten god damn minutes?!” He stood and held his hands up, clearly frustrated. With what, I didn’t know. 

“I… Josh, I didn’t mean to…” I was at a loss. We’d gotten annoyed with each other, sure. What couple didn’t have arguments? But in the three years we’d been together, he’d never raised his voice at me. “It’s just, we made plans for tonight, and when you didn’t show up, I thought something had happened to you. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Yeah, Kara, I couldn’t really care less right now about our stupid plans, alright? I know I skipped out on our anniversary. But maybe I wouldn’t have if you hadn’t cheated on me.”

I could do nothing but stare at him doe-eyed. It had never crossed my mind since meeting Josh to even look at another man, let alone do anything with one. I loved him so much I wasn’t sure I could ever be with anyone else again. 

“Josh, what are you talking about?” I whimpered, tears already forming in my eyes. 

“Don’t play fucking stupid. You got caught, alright? Just own up to it.” He looked at me like I was gum on the bottom of his shoe.

“I didn’t get caught because I didn’t do anything!”

“Oh, yeah? The explain Riley.”

Riley. That name automatically sent me to a dark place.

Riley and I met in high school. He ran with the popular crowd, I guess, but it’s not like he was captain of the football team or anything. He was just well liked. Funny and smart and kind to everyone, regardless of their popularity. We started talking when we were paired up during a project for art class. He was sweet; would always carry my books and walk me to class, sometimes even surprising me with a coffee or flowers at my locker in the morning. But, all that glitters isn’t always gold. 

After we went to junior prom together, Riley and I began to get more serious. Over the summer, he’d convinced me to write off all of my friends because he just loved spending time with me so much, he wanted to spend it all with me. I quit the dance team because the form fitting costumes we wore made Riley uncomfortable. For a long time, found it endearing he cared so much. Until we left for college.

We both went to Ohio State and during sophomore year, we rented our first house together. That’s when things with Riley started turning really sour. I was expected to text Riley all day, every day, whether I was in a lecture, trying to take notes, or at work, trying to wait tables. My friends all had to be female, and if we ever went out, Riley had to come with, and had to approve my outfits before I was allowed to leave the house. One night, a guy from my chemistry class asked if he could come over to copy my notes from a day of class he missed. That was the first time Riley hit me. 

It only got worse from there. He’d come to my work, ordering drinks all night from across the restaurant while watching me. When I talked too kindly with a customer, I’d get punished. If I sat next to a male in class or stood too close to a male at a football game, I’d get punished. He stayed clear of my face and arms, but my ribs and legs were constantly littered with bruises from where he’d hit and kicked me.

I deserved it. Riley convinced me of that. I didn’t love him enough and this was my punishment. 

I didn’t seek help, myself. One night, Riley got sloppy and hit me across the face, resulting in a black eye. I covered as best I could with makeup the next morning before class but the guy from chemistry noticed. He’d text me during class for weeks, asking if I was okay, and if I needed help. Two weeks after the black eye, when Riley broke two of my ribs with his steel toed boots. The next morning, after Riley had left for work, I texted the guy from chem. “I need help.”

His mom had been a survivor of domestic abuse. She worked for the state now and gave me all the help I needed to get away from Riley. He was sent to jail for a while, and I went to therapy for years, trying to understand that this wasn’t my fault and I didn’t deserve it. I now had a restraining order against him and he hadn’t bothered me in years. 

“Riley?! How do you even know that name?! Josh, I don’t know what the fuck is going on but I swear on my life I have never cheated on you!”

He scoffed, pulling up instagram on his phone. “Swear on this.” He threw his phone next to me on the bed.

I picked up the phone with shaking hands. 

I saw Riley’s instagram account. There were pictures of him at work or with his family, but I also saw pictures of the two of us taken in college being posted as if they were taken now. Me sitting across from him in coffee shops and us holding hands in the streets of downtown Columbus. Captions reading, “if only you knew how much i loved you” and “can’t wait to see her again”. Tears began pouring freely down my face. 

“Josh, no. No, no, no, you don’t understand. This isn’t… He’s-”

“Just fuckin’ let it go, Kara. I found you out.” He snatched his phone out of my hands. “Some fan DM’d me his page and he and I had a nice, lengthy chat about the two of you. I can work through a lot of shit, Kar, but this?! I can’t move past this. I’m done. I’ll find somewhere else to stay for the night. Try not to be here when I get back.”

Before I could even process what had just happened, he was out of the room, slamming the door behind him hard enough to shake the walls. I heard his truck start up and drive away. 

I curled up in a ball and cried until I ran out of tears. I knew better than to try and call or text Josh. He needed to cool off and I needed to respect his space. I wrote him a letter before anything else, explaining my side of things. How Riley and I met and what he did to me. How I had a restraining order against him. How much I hated him and didn’t understand why he was doing this. I was so emotional while writing it, I can hardly remember what it said. I remember crying while writing it, my tears smudging the ink. After I’d gotten everything written down, I folded it up and slid it into an envelope, lying it on top of his pillow. He could read it whenever he was ready and that was the best I could do. Then, I packed a bag, called Boone, and hadn’t seen or heard from Josh since. Just like that. 

Riley had sent me a DM after the incident, asking if he could meet me for coffee so we could talk things over. He had orchestrated this entire thing in an effort to get Josh away from me. It was a breach of the restraining order, but I didn’t want to stir things up. I just wanted the entire mess to go away. I ignored the message and a week later, he showed up at my work. I went into a full panic attack and called the police. He was in custody and I was pressing charges. I just wished I wasn’t going through it alone. I wanted Josh to be there, to stand behind me and quiet my mind when it got too loud. But he was nowhere to be found.

He never called. He never texted. I had no idea if he’d even read the letter or not. Boone said Josh refused to talk about anything having to do with me whatsoever. I wasn’t sure if that was good or bad But it’d been two months of me moping around and being afraid of my own shadow, so when Boone begged me to go out, I agreed. I needed to feel something. 

Lost in my memories, I hadn’t noticed the route we had taken. We were across town from my new apartment. We were at our place. Well, Josh’s place. 

“What are we-”

“I just… figured you wouldn’t want to be alone tonight. That’s all.” He twiddled his thumbs against the steering wheel and bit his lip. 

“Thank you.” 

His eyes flashed to me quickly and widened. I assume he was expecting me to ask him to take me home, but as much as I hated to admit it, he was right. I had no interest in being alone right now.

Everything in the house was exactly the same. It’d been two months and he hadn’t even moved my scarf from the coat rack. Pictures of us still sat upon shelves. Even the Christmas decorations we’d put up together remained on the walls. 

“You should take a shower, uh, clear your head. I’ll take the guest room.”

“You don’t have to do that, Josh. I can shower down here and take the guest room. You’ve already done more for me tonight than I could ever ask for.”

“Kara, please, just… just take our room, alright? I mean, my room. Or, uh... “ His hand moved to run through his hair and scratch the back of his neck, a nervous habit he’s had since we met. 

An uncomfortable silence came upon us and I wanted to leave the area as quickly as I could.

“I’ll uh, I’ll take your bed.” Carefully, I walked upstairs as if the ground was made of glass. 

I stood under scalding hot water for an hour after scrubbing every inch of my body, making sure to get every microbe from that creep off of me. Josh hadn’t even moved my soap, but craving familiarity and comfort, I opted to use his instead. The scent of cedar filled my nostrils, momentarily making me forget that ash tray scented prick from earlier. 

Stepping out of the shower, I wrapped a towel around myself before noticing a few folded pieces of clothing on the counter that weren’t there when I got in. Sitting on top of them was a scratch piece of paper.

Closest I have to anything of yours. -J.

He left a pair of black sweats and a massive Columbus Blue Jays shirt. My favorite one that I’d stolen on more occasions that I could count. I smiled to myself before slipping his shirt on and leaving the sweats on the counter. 

Being back in the bed felt odd. I was relatively used to sleeping in it alone from Josh going on road trips, but this was different. We’d never slept separately while in the same house before. Not even after a fight. We’d always curl up back to back and halfway through the night, he’d wrap around me, apologizing before kissing my neck and falling asleep. Couldn’t do that from downstairs, now could he? And of course, my mind ran a mile a minute, thinking of everything that could’ve happened tonight if Josh hadn’t been there. If he’d still been sick or knew I was going and wanted to avoid me. My restless body found itself tip-toeing down the stairs. 

Raising my hand to knock on the guest room door, it opened before my knuckles could come into contact with it. His blue eyes widened at the sight of me. “I was just heading up to check on you.”

“I can’t um… C-can I sleep with you? I mean, just, I’m so jumpy and every little noise is- you know what? This is stupid, I’m sorry.” I scoffed and turned to head back upstairs. 

“It’s not stupid Kar, you went through some crazy shit. C’mere.”

We laid next to each other in silence. As weird as it was to be in our old bed without him, this was even more uncomfortable. 

“Are you okay? I mean, I know what he did was fucked up but he didn’t physically hurt you, did he?”

“No, no, you uh, you came in time. I’m okay.”

“Good.”

Another minute or two passed and my mind began to wander again.

“Josh, if you hadn’t been there…”

“Hey, come on, you can’t think like that. I was there, and you’re okay. That’s all that matters.”

I looked over at him in the moonlight and took a sharp intake of breath. I just couldn’t stop replaying it in my head. 

“Oh, Kara, honey.” I was pulled into his chest and began taking deep breaths, willing myself to keep it together. “I told you I’d always be here for you and I meant it, alright? Nothing is ever going to happen to you.”

I lifted my head, my sight flickering between his eyes and his lips. Inching forward, I swallowed nervously, afraid of rejection. Instead, Josh gently brushed a strand of damp hair behind my ear and slowly pulled me up to meet him.

The instant our lips touched, I felt fireworks in my stomach and moaned at the contact. I missed him so much. The kiss grew quickly, two months of not even speaking to each other catching up with us quickly. It turned from slow and hesitant to heated and passionate quickly. I began to run my hand down his clothed chest, pushing hands underneath his shirt and lifting it slightly. 

“Kara, wait-” 

“Please.” I whimpered. “I don’t want him to be the last man who’s touched me.”  I kissed him gently, bumping his nose with mine. “Please make me feel safe, Josh.”

He hesitated for a moment but claiming my lips again with his. Slowly, he used one hand to lift the shirt from my body, tossing it into the darkness while moving to lie me on my back and hover above me, one forearm resting next to my head, the other hand cradling my neck. He looked my body up and down and kissed just below my ear. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful, Kara.” Josh muttered, continuing my assault on my neck and decolletage before making his way back up to sweep his tongue into my mouth. He was always gentle with me but never as gentle as this. Tonight, he handled me as if I were made of glass. Like if he made one wrong move, I’d shatter. And maybe I would. 

He sat up on his knees for a moment to remove his own shirt before settling back down on top of me. His massive body sat on mine as if some kind of weighted blanket, shielding me from the world. As he kissed me, he moved his body along with mine. I could feel his erection growing against my hip and I moaned at the thought of it. My hands made their way down his body and onto his waistband, pushing on his sweats. 

One of his hands halted mine. “Kar, are you sure? I just want to be here for you. We don’t have to do this.”

“I want this, Josh. I want you.” 

His sweats met the floor and his length stood at full attention. I moved a hand to stroke it but he caught my wrist, guiding it to his mouth and kissing my knuckles, “Baby,” my bicep, “this is about you.” my shoulder, “Let me take care of you.”

We locked eyes as slowly pulled my lacy boyshorts down my legs. He kissed, licked, and sucked his way back up my legs, only letting his tongue dip into my heat twice before continuing to kiss up my body. Once he was back up at eye level, I felt his thick fingers carefully moving about around my entrance.

“Josh, please, just… please make love to me.”

His eyes widened but he said nothing, instead using the same hand to pull one of my legs around his hip. He looked down momentarily, lining himself up before thrusting his shaft into me. We moaned together at the feeling. I’d almost forgotten how good we felt together. 

Josh moved slowly, taking his time and being sure to stay close to me. My leg stayed planted atop his hip as he sank to rest his weight on me ever so carefully. When my eyes weren’t shut tight in pleasure, they wandered over him. The furrow of his brow, his button nose that sat above his plump lips. I watched his biceps and abs contract with every movement he made. It didn’t take long for the pressure to build in my center and I began whimpering and moaning his name. 

“Mm, I can’t… Josh, I’m-”

“I know, sweetheart, I’m right there with you.” He buried his head in my neck, gently nipping my earlobe. “Let go, baby. Let me feel you.” He moved his hands down again and circled my clit with them, sending me over the edge. 

“Oh, my god. Oh, my… Ah!” My hands gripped tightly to his biceps as they flexed next to me. I came breathlessly. I saw stars and all I could hear was Josh panting above me as he continued to thrust into me. I felt him bite my shoulder and finally cum inside me with a strangled, “Fuck, I love you.”

He moved to the side slightly, just enough to grab the blanket and pull it over us. I turned on my side. It was only a moment before I felt Josh’s arm wrap around my waist and hold my body tight to his.

“Josh?” I whispered, afraid to ruin this moment.

“I promise we can talk about this is the morning, sweetheart. Please just let me hold you tonight.” He sounded tired. I complied with his request, wrapping my hand around the forearm resting against my stomach, and it wasn’t long before my eyes grew too heavy to keep open any longer.

[norequestimagines]

Safeguard [Pt. 1]

TW: attempted rape, violence

“Please come! I promise you he won’t show up tonight! Seth said he’s been sick for a week!”

Lie. 

I appreciated Boone trying to get me out of the house. I hadn’t been doing much since the breakup other than studying and making up excuses to not go anywhere. As reluctant as I was, the idea of dressing up and being around friends was starting to sound nice. And, with the promise that my ex wouldn’t be there? I couldn’t find it in me to argue any further. 

But of course, there he sat, across the apartment, on Seth’s couch. I was talking with Boone when I saw him. I knew he wouldn't lie to me on purpose. He genuinely thought he wouldn’t be here. I knew that. But I was tipsy and tired, and I instantly felt like this was all his fault. How dare he accidentally invite me somewhere Josh would be? And how dare he be here?! How dare he be around our friends (who were all his friends first) smiling and laughing and having a good time? Alright, I may have also still been bitter. 

He looked good, but tired. His hair was shorter, still pushed back but not as “teen wolf” as it was two months ago. Tired eyes crinkled while he laughed halfheartedly at something Seth said. His masculine hands were wrapped loosely around a plastic red cup, resting between his knees. I hated that he looked good. I hated his soft hair and his big veiny hands and his stupid laugh. 

“Hello?? Anyone home?!” Boone waved his hand in front of my face, snapping me out of my trance. 

“Shit, sorry, B. Got a little distracted. I thought he was sick.” I muttered just loud enough for him to hear, nodding in Josh’s direction while turning my eyes away. 

He turned to look before facing me again. “Aw, man, yeah, he was. I guess he’s feeling better. I can take you home if you want?”

“No, no! Don’t even worry about it. It’s been two months. We can coexist.” 

I was determined not to let Josh’s being here ruin my night. Boone, being my best friend in Ohio, knew that Josh’s being here already did ruin my night, but knew that if he called me out on it, I’d burst into tears. Instead, he just gave me an uncomfortable smile, which was almost worse.

“I need more booze.” I said abruptly before hurrying into the kitchen. I managed to blink away the few tears that had gathered in my eyes and sniffled once before taking a shot of tequila. 

“Tequila’s no fun alone. Bad night?” An unfamiliar voice sounded behind me. 

I turned to meet a leather jacket, being worn by a pair of dark eyes and a killer smile. I was drunk and truthfully couldn’t make out much more than that. “Just got a lot better. Do you want to dance?” 

Leather Jacket and I made it to the dance floor and started off holding hands and moving relatively innocently to the beat of the music, but it didn’t take long before we’d grown closer, my backside against his front, his lips brushing my ear and the side of my neck. I turned slowly, swaying my hips and running my hands up his torso. His hands slip to my hips and around my body, dipping low beneath my back. When our lips touched, I could taste cigarette smoke but I was so drunk I didn’t even flinch.

I was also so drunk I didn’t flinch when he led me away from the living room and up the stairs. 

So drunk I didn’t realize he’d taken me into a bedroom and locked the door. 

So drunk I let him keep kissing me and lay me down on the bed. 

Someone was knocking but we ignored it. At first, at least. They kept knocking and saying something about no fucking in their house. 

Their house? Seth!

“Wait, wait,” I gasped out between kisses. “That’s Seth, he’s my friend!” I tried pushing Leather Jacket off of me but he didn’t budge. “Come on!” I giggled. “Let me go say hi to Seth!”

“Would you just let me kiss you, baby?” He grunted, suddenly grasping me tighter and shoving his tongue back in my mouth. 

Seth kept knocking and I kept trying to push the man on top of me away. I was starting to panic. He wouldn’t stop and soon grabbed both of my hands in one of his, holding them above my head and running his other hand along my body. 

He detached his lips from mine and I screamed the first thing that came to mind.

“JOSH!”

The man on top of me slapped me across the face. “Shut up and stay still, Jesus Christ.”

But I knew better than that. I wasn’t about to just let him have his way with me without putting up a fight. 

He released my hands and pulled on one of the straps on my shirt, snapping it in half. “JOSH, HELP!” He slapped me again and covered my mouth. Tears began to run down my face and I began to hyperventilate.

The pounding on the door grew louder and faster. I could hear Seth yelling for Josh and Boone yelling my name.

“KARA!” Bang. Bang. 

I was able to wiggle a leg free and used it to knee the man, but he saw it coming and moved before I could make decent enough contact. In doing that, his grip on my mouth loosened enough for me to bite his hand. I tasted blood as he yelped and pulled it away.

“Oh, you little-”

The door flew open, pieces of it splintering off. The man on top of me whipped his head to the left, looking at who just busted through the door. Josh. He came. 

Josh took everything in in about a half second, making long strides over to the bed before ripping the nameless man off of me and throwing him into a wall. 

“Josh!” 

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, huh” Josh landed his first punch and blood began to pour from the other man’s nose. “Think you can just-” punch “fuck drunk girls?!” The man shoved Josh, wiping his nose of the back of his hand before punching back. They tackled each other and began fighting violently. 

I was so wrapped up in watching and worrying about Josh I hadn’t even noticed Boone wrapping a throw blanket around my shoulders until he lifted me to stand. I tried to get out of his grasp, to get to Josh and stop him before he killed the guy, but Boone wouldn't let me go. I gripped onto him and begged for Josh to stop, but he as so full of rage, I don’t think he even heard me. Seth raced forward and grabbed Josh’s shoulders but Josh just shook him off like it was nothing. Two more guys from the team ran in as Boone guided me away. I could still hear everything from down the hallway. 

“Josh, stop!”

“You’re going to kill him!”

“You’re scaring Kar!”

The commotion stopped at that. 

“Where is she?” 

I broke loose from Boone’s grip and ran into the hall bathroom, locking the door behind me. I didn’t want to face him. Not now. Not like this. I opened the window for some fresh air and sank to the floor, beginning to hyperventilate again.

There was a gentle knock and soft words followed. “Kar, it’s uh… it’s me. Look I… I know you’re terrified right now and I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you, baby. I just wanted to protect you and I snapped. Can I come in? I just want to make sure you’re okay. Can you unlock this door for me, sweetheart?”

“I-I c-c-can’t.” I sobbed.

“Yes, you can, baby. Just turn the lock for me, yeah? I just want to help you, okay? Let me fix this, Kara, please. Please just let me in so I can-”

I managed to reach up and unlock to door, desperate to feel the security of him around me. It took seconds for him to enter and lock the door behind himself. 

“Oh, baby.” He whispered, more to himself than to me. He walked over to where I’d crawled back to; a crumpled mess on the floor under the window. Sitting next to me, he pulled me into his lap and began rubbing large circles on my back with one hand and cradling my head with the other. “Shh, I’m here now. It’s okay. You’re safe. I’ve got you, sweetheart.”

He continued to murmur affirmations in my ear as I rode out my panic attack. I don’t know if I was there for ten minutes or two hours. All I knew was that I was half-shirtless and wrapped in Josh’s arms and I didn’t ever want to leave. 

My sobs and gasps turned into sniffles and hiccups, and I looked at him for the first time since the fight. He was a wreck. One black eye, a split lip, a split eyebrow, and a bloody nose. I could only imagine what his knuckles looked like. I ran my right hand down his face, careful to avoid his wounds. “I’m so sorry, Josh.”

“Don’t be. I’m glad I was here.” He took my hand in his, kissing my knuckles. “Let’s get you home, yeah?” 

He stood first, then held out a hand for me to grab. I felt so ridiculous. He was the one who just all but went to war for me and I was the one weak on my feet. The throw blanket Boone had wrapped around me got lost when I ran to the bathroom, so Josh took off his flannel and helped my shaking hands button it up. Pulling me into his side, he led me out of Seth’s nearly empty and very quiet apartment and to his truck. 

“Wait, what about-” 

“Seth and Boone are taking care of everything else. Let’s just worry about taking care of you.”

[norequestimagines]

Soft Place to Land Announcement

So Soft Place to Land did sooo much better than I thought it would, thank y’all so much!!! But I think I’m going to change it to being a one shot instead of a two-part like i’d originally planned. I just can’t seem to write the second piece. It’s just not coming out, it’s not flowing, and I don’t want to put anything out that I’m not proud of. Hope you guys understand!

[norequestimagines]

Billy Hargrove is the Theo Raeken of Stranger Things

[norequestimagines]

Soft Place to Land [1/1]

{Billy loves Rachel. Rachel loves Billy. Rachel’s dad loves her. He does not love Billy.}

"You are forbidden from seeing that Hargrove boy, do you understand me?!" Her father was cut off by the sound a door slamming upstairs. Rachel had been caught. Again. She knew her dad didn't like her seeing Billy. Everyone in Hawkins knew her dad didn't like her seeing Billy. He was bad news. Fast car, leather jacket, and serious anger issues. A boy like Billy had no business with a girl like Rachel. According to her father, at least. She was frustrated. No other word encapsulated how she felt. Just completely and totally frustrated. She and Billy were so careful! They never spent time at her house or his. They didn't even hang out in Hawkins, for heaven's sake. At school, they pretended the other didn't exist, which all but drove both of them crazy. But her mom, Carolyn, was an administrator at the school, and they just couldn't risk it. They arranged meeting places and times through locker notes, left when no one was looking. Fate, as it would seem, just wasn't on their side. Rachel and Billy had decided to meet for lunch and a movie, three towns over. They were halfway through their shared milkshake when the door bursted open, drawing everyone in the diner's attention, including the two teens. "YOU!" Her father's finger was pointed right at Billy. "What the hell do you think you're doing with my daughter?!" This was not the first run in Billy had with Brad. He'd repeatedly been told to stay away from her, and it was becoming clean that Brad's fuse was getting shorter and shorter. "Listen, Sir, I didn't-" Billy held his hands up in a surrender. "You shut the hell up! You are not the kind of boy I want Rachel around and you know that! You think you can lure her away from home, to what? Take advantage? Huh? Is that you're plan?!" Brad's arms were flailing wildly, fueled by his anger. He was red in the face and not calming down. Billy recoiled, the sight reminding him of his own father. "Sir, I would never dream of-" the boy started at the same moment Rachel spoke up, "Dad, no! That's not what-" Brad saw who he could only assume was the diner manager on his way to diffuse the situation and knew he needed to reign himself in. "Both of you, just stop. Rachel, I'm parked across the street. Go." The young girl looked across the table and her boyfriend, tears in her eyes, her lip quivering. "It's okay, Rach, go." Billy mumbled, tears in his own. I love you, he mouthed. She mouthed her affections back to him before standing and walking out in front of her dad.

-

After listening to him rant the entire drive home, she leapt out of the car the moment he pulled into the driveway. She completely ignored her mom when she walked past her on her way to the staircase, stomping her way up. Brad was hot on her tail the whole time, only stopping at the bottom of the stairs but continuing to yell. Once her heard her door slam, he went silent. Sure, they've argued before. They've argued over Billy before. But he'd never seen her so angry with him, and it hurt. Maybe that was part of the reason he got so mad at her- because she'd rather her own father be angry with her if it meant she could be around that hooligan. He didn't understand her. Brad grew up in Hawkins and worked alongside Hopper at the station. He knew all about Billy's background. Kicked out of two schools for fighting, speeding ticket after speeding ticket, grades in the dumpster. He would never be good enough for his Rachel. Rachel was always a good kid, always! Kept her head down and stayed out of trouble. Always worked her butt off to get straight A's. She was so smart, so why was she being so stupid, hanging around that Hargrove kid? He was in the same town they were, doing extremely last minute Christmas shopping. It was Christmas Eve and he couldn't find a ham anywhere. When he saw Rachel and Billy through the window of that diner, he completely lost it. Sure, looking back, he knew he way overreacted, but he couldn't admit that to anyone but himself. Just like he couldn't admit the reason he didn't like Billy. Billy Hargrove reminded Brad Anderson way too much of himself when he was 17. He was always getting into fights at school. Always arguing with teachers, getting kicked out of class. Always totaling cars, drinking underage, not listening to any kind of authority. He knows he wasn't any good when he was a kid, and his little girl deserved better than that. Upstairs, Rachel was a wreck. She threw herself across her bed, bawling into her arms. She wasn't an idiot, she knew Billy was bad. But she knew so much more than that. She knew what his dad did to him. She knew he didn't want to be the way he was. She knew he had a side that was so gentle and soft and loving. Billy had a hard time showing that side of himself but he was learning. He had so much good in him, he just needed someone else to see that. And Rachel did. She had hopes of exchanging gifts in the diner, after they had finished lunch, since she knew they wouldn't get to see each other tomorrow, Christmas Day. Now she feared she would never be able to speak to Billy again. - It was later, now. Much later. Rachel had cried herself to sleep. After getting up, washing her face and getting something to eat, she was about the head back upstairs to bed when she heard a knock on the door. She paused, the knock having been so soft she thought she was imagining it. She raised her foot to ascend once more when the knock sounded again. She walks to the door quickly, and the sight she sees through the peephole astounds her. It was Billy. That alone was reason enough for her to be shocked. Billy Hargrove, on her porch, after everything that happened today? But seeing what happened to Billy's face tore her to shreds. His eyebrow was split, causing blood to trickle down the side of his face. His nose had been bent, a butterfly bruise beginning to form in the center of his face. His cheek was raw, his lip was swollen. He looked to be having trouble standing up straight, doubled over in pain. She honestly wouldn't have recognized him if he hadn't been wearing the same outfit as earlier. The second she had the door open, she was drilling him. "What happened?! What did he say? What did you say?? Did Susan do anything? God, she never does anyth-" Rachel was rambling, her hands running all over Billy, looking for more injuries. She noted that he winced when she touched his ribs. "Baby, baby, it's okay. I'm okay. I just had to see you. I... I'm sorry. For everything. For ever getting involved with you in the first place. I'm no good. I'm no good for anyone, but I'm especially no good for you. You're dad's right, you should be with someone better." Billy had tears in his eyes as he looked down at her. "Billy! Don't you dare! Don't you say any of that ever again! I love you, Billy. Whatever he said, whatever my dad said, none of it is true!" Rachel would've kept assuring him if she weren't interrupted by her parents coming downstairs. In her panic over her boyfriend's condition, she didn't even notice them until she heard her dad's voice. "Rachel, get upstairs. Now. Billy, this is it. You come around again and I'll-" Brad went silent upon seeing Billy. His eyes raked over the boy, and for the first time, he felt bad for him. Still, unconciously, he stepped between his daughter her boyfriend. "What happened? Who did this to you?" Billy met Brad's eyes before looking at Rachel, quesioningly. "It's okay, honey, you can tell him. Go ahead." He met her dad's gaze once more, only for a moment, before casting his eyes to the floor. "My old man, he... he's always beat up on me. But tonight he got drunk. Asked where I'd been. I told him I was out with Rach and he uh... he asked why I was with 'that whore' again and I just... I lost it." He looked directly at Brad, his gaze not breaking this time. "Rach is my girl, and no one is going to talk about her like that, no matter what. So I swung on him. I swung on him hard. I thought I'd finally won. I finally beat him. But when I was walking away, he broke a bottle over my head. I don't really rememeber what happened after that... I just know it hurts. I hurt all over. It's never been this bad before. I'm scared and I didn't know where to go. I just needed to see Rachel." When he looked back at her, she was nearly sobbing. She pushed passed her dad, jumping into Billy's arms, crying into his neck. He grabbed onto her as if she'd vanish if he didn't. "I'm so sorry, Billy, I'm so sorry!" "Shh, shh, it's okay, I'm here, ain't I? I'm alright, sweetheart, I'm always alright." Brad had heard about Neil Hargrove before. The neighbors had called into the station, saying they heard fighting going on at the house. Teachers were concerned about Billy's home life because of his attitude at school. Any time an officer would go to the Hargrove house to check up on things, everything checked out. All of the officers got a weird vibe from Neil and Susan, but there was nothing concrete to go off of so there was nothing they could do. Brad looked back at his wife for a moment, his attention being taken by the sound of a truck rumbling up their street. "Kids, why don't we take this conversation into the house?" He said, still keeping eye contact with the truck as it parked in front of the house. Neil Hargrove's truck. The teens quickly walked into the house, Rachel supporting a large amount of Billy's weight. Carolyn, Rachel's mom, followed suit. "Brad? Honey, are you coming?" "I'll be in soon, darling. Go take care of them." She turned, only to be stopped by the feeling of her husbands hand on her wrist. "And call the station. Hop is on patrol tonight." - "Let's get you kids some cocoa, huh? You must be freezing, Billy! Did you drive?" "No, ma'am, I walked from my place. Was hoping my dad wouldn't notice I'd left if he didn't hear the car." "Oh, you poor thing! Rachel, get him a blanket from the hall closet, would you? Oh! And one of your brother's sweatshirts! There's still a few in his room from when he left for school!" Rachel kissed Billy's head before leaving the room. "Billy, honey," Carolyn started once her daughter was out of earshot, "I know Brad has has issues with you, but try not to blame yourself for that. He sees a lot of himself in you. Seems like only yesterday, my dad was telling me, 'Carolyn, don't you ever talk to that Brad boy again!', but he came around. Brad will, too." She repeated her daughters actions, kissing him on the head before exiting. Billy sat in shock. Here he was, in Rachel's house. And her parents welcomed him in. Her mom is making him cocoa. What kind of alternate universe is he in? - It took Neil much, much longer than it should've to get out of his truck. Even longer to walk up to the house. He tripped and almost fell at least three times. "Mr. Hargrove, how can I help you?" Brad looked down his nose at Neil, who was still standing on the walkway, down a small set of stairs. "I know he's here, pig, I saw him when I pulled up. Just give me my boy, alright?" Neil slurred, still clearly drunk. "Neil, did you drive while intoxicated, to confront an officer, about taking home the kid you just beat? Man, you're a cocky son of a bitch, I'll give you that." Brad chuckled in disbeleif. "Listen," hiccup, "Just give me the boy and we'll both be out of your hair. I'm his dad, now hand him over." The drunk man stumbled, bracing himself on the mailbox. "You know what, Neil? I'll do you one better. How about I arrest you, take you in for driving under the influence, and we'll have a nice little chat tomorrow morning about your court date, hm?" Neil didn't like that answer. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was just that he's generally an idiot, but he decided it was in his best interest to walk up the front steps to square up with Brad. After slowly making his way up, he very unsteadily raised his arm, forming a fist. He threw his arm forward, but in his druken stupor, lost his balance and fell. He just started to push himself up when Brad pushed him back down with his foot. The sober man knelt down, placing a knee on Neil's back to hold him steady, and held his hands together behind his back. As perfect timing would have it, a second truck came speeding toward the house. Only this one had red and blue lights flashing from the roof. Hopper parked haphazardly with two wheels over the sidewalk. Jumping out of the Blazer, he was pulling his cuffs from his belt while walking up to the house. - When Brad walked back into the house, the sight before him made his heart melt more than he'd like to admit. Rachel was curled up into Billy, her torso resting on his slouched figure. His fingers were gently running along strands of her hair as he kissed her forhead now and again. She was facing him and they were talking in hushed tones. The older man decided to not ruin their moment, instead walking to the kitchen to check on his wife. - "Are you sure you're okay? You said you're ribs were hurting, what if you have a cracked rib or something?! We can go to the hospital, Billy, really, it's no prob-" "Sweetheart, I'm fine, really." Billy chuckled. "All I need is a few more kisses from you and some of that cocoa your mom is making because it smells killer." He smiled down at her. Rachel began to smile before rolling her eyes at herself. "This is so ridiculous. You show up unannounced, beaten and bloody, and you're the one comforting me." The boy laughed loudly this time, throwing his head back. Rachel loved seeing him laugh that way. He looked so careless and at ease. He deserved to feel that way more often. Their heads turned when they heard the kitchen door swing open. "Okay! I've got hot cocoa for everyone, extra marshmallows because it's officially Christmas!" Carolyn said joyously. She always loved Christmas, and got almost more excited than Rachel ever did. Considering how much Rachel loved it, that was really saying something. Everyone took a mug from the tray, the elders sitting down in the large armchairs across from the couch. "So, Billy, listen. You-" "I know I need to get going, sir. I'm sorry I showed up like this. And I'm sorry about my dad. I'll get out of-" "Whoa, whoa, slow down there, tiger. I'm not pushing you out the door just yet. Carolyn and I have talked and you're welcome to stay here as long as you'd like." At his words, the kids were totally and completely shocked. "I... But... My dad, he-" "Your dad is in jail for the night, but they'll probably have to release him tomorrow, once he's sobered up. Now, with your go ahead, I'd like to fight him on this. But you're almost 18 so there's not a big chance the system will give you up. It's just a lot of paperwork and processes that would probably take so long your birthday would pass before it's final anyway. But, that doesn't mean that I don't have connections. The cheif is one of my best friends, the town judge is Carolyn's father. We'll still look into things, make sure that kid sister of yours is okay. We have your back, Billy. If you want us to, that is." Billy had no words. For once in his life, he had no idea what to say. He was more and more overwhelmed with everyword that came out of his girlfriend's dad's mouth. Instead of replying, he felt his eyes well up with tears. His hands flew to his face, attempting (and failing) to cover up his emotions. Rachel wrapped an arm around the boys shoulders, the other around his front. "It's okay, baby. You're okay. You're safe here." She continued to console him until his cries turned to quiet sniffles. He raised his head, wiping under his eyes and clearing his throat. "Thank you, sir. I uh... Thank you." "You're more than welcome, dear." Carolyn spoke up, looking at him warmly. He hadn't been looked at like that since his mom died. "Now, we'll have Rachel show you to the shower, and you can stay in her brother's old room. We can sort out your belongings and car situation after you get some rest, does that sound okay?" "That sounds amazing, Mrs. Anderson, thank you. Thank you both." The teens stood, stopping halfway up the stairs when Brad's voice sounded once more. "Billy, you can stay in Rachel's room tonight. It's not going to be a regular thing, but I know you're pretty shaken up right now. No funny business!" "Dad!" Rachel yelled back, but this time with a smile on her face. She grabbed Billy's hand, leading him the rest of the way.

[norequestimagines]

The Storm // Derek Hale Imagine

It has been five hours since we'd last spoken. Four and a half hours since we've last seen each other. A half hour since I stopped crying. I don't even remember how the fight started. I don't remember what we were both so angry about. We both said things we didn't mean. Well, I said things I didn't mean. He said things I can only hope he didn't mean. I've never tried to sleep in this bed without Derek before, and I never want to again. It's big. Cold and lonely. Ironically enough, all words I would've used to describe him when we first met. But like the bed has always been before now, he became warm and soft. He was the first sip of hot coffee on a cold morning. The smell of pine trees and pumpkin pie. Derek was my home. Like a house, our relationship is starting to show signs of wear. I thought our foundation was strong, our walls well insulated. But the newness has worn off and regardless of how much patching we tried to do, it would always get torn apart shortly after. Things would get better for a few days, maybe a couple weeks if we were lucky, but then something else would break and we'd be back at each others throats all over again. As I'm tossing and turning, uanble to quiet the thoughts in my mind, I can hear Derek doing the same down the hall; ruffling the sheets and blankets on the bed in the guest room. The one room in the house we never finished painting. Would we remain like the half blue, half cream colored walls? Unfinished and forgotten? It's been raining for weeks. Derek and I had to put sandbags along the far end of the back yard because the creek behind the house is beginning to flood. Tonight was supposed to be the worst of it. I can hear the storm coming. The wind is picking up, the rain is getting heavier, and there's thunder far off in the distance. I should've taken my wind chimes down days ago, before the storm rolled in. They're going to get ruined. Why don't I hear them? Derek must have taken them down for me. I've always loved this kind of weather. I take any excuse I can to wear leggings and sweaters and cuddle as close as I can into Derek's side. But tonight, the storm is just a reminder of the fact that I can't cuddle with him at all. He's two doors down and I feel like he's across the country. The lights are flickering. Please don't let the power go out. Let me keep the light on. Just the lamp. Please don't let the power go out. It's dark. Oh holy hell is it dark. Derek and I were lucky enough to be able to stake claim on the land his family once owned. The house was rebuilt to the best of his memory of what it once was. I love living out here. I love the sound of the creek and the birds chirping in the morning. The crickets and frogs at night. It's so quiet and peaceful here, like I'm far away from the entire world, when really it's only a ten minute drive back into town. But when it gets dark here, it gets dark. There are no street lights illuminating the roads, no headlights passing through the window panes. Just the little moonlight that's able to sneak through the trees. And of course, the dark is my biggest fear. But I won't call for Derek. I am stubborn and prideful and I will not call for Derek. "Derek?" my voice cracks, almost inaudibly. I hear no reply. Not even a rustle of his bedsheets. "Derek?" I try again. Fear is making my voice quiet. Whether it's the fear of the dark or the fear of facing my fiance right now, I can't be sure. i can do this. I can get up and find my way to him. Two doors down. My feet hit the hardwood and I stumble along with my arms outsretched ahead of me, looking for a wall. My eyes are beginning to adjust and I can just make out the doorway. I round the corner and ram face first into something that wasn't supposed to be there. Naturally, I screamed at the top of my lungs. "It's me! Baby it's me, it's Derek!" He says frantically, grabbing my shoulders and pulling me into him. I'm not sure the exact reason I started crying, but I'm crying hard, clinging to him and struggling to breathe. "Baby you're okay, everything is okay. Come downstairs with me to grab candles, okay?" I nod my head, still not trusting my voice, but Derek knows I agreed and he leads me slowly down the stairs. We reach the bottom floor and Derek keeps an arm around my shoulders as he opens the closet on the left of the stairs and reaches up to grab the bag of tea lights. He hands them to me and grabs a few blankets from the top shelf before we walk to the couch together. I unfold the blankets as Derek lights what seems to be every candle we have and sets them on various shelves and side tables all around the living room. "Do you want to stay here for a bit? I was just going to make us both some cocoa." I nod at him and open my mouth to reply but he cuts me off. "You want whipped cream on yours, I know the drill. I'll be right back." Derek kisses my head as he walks into the next room. I hear him opening cabinets and drawers, starting the gas range. I can't help but think about the night we first moved in. Derek insisted on cooking for me. I don't know how a person managers to burn pasta noodles but Derek did and we decided maybe ordering pizza wasn't such a bad idea. The sound of soft noises coming from the kitchen are just starting to lull me to sleep when I hear him again. "Cocoa with whip." he almost whispers, handing me my favorite mug. He moves to sit on the other end of the couch. Now, all we hear is the rain. All we feel is the awkward. We sit in an incredibly uncomfortable silence before Derek glances at me and chuckles. "You've got whip on your nose." I swipe at it but miss. "Here, come here." We lean towards each other and he stoked his thumb across the tip of my nose, licking the whipped cream off his first finger. I smile softly to myself and lean back. "Sorry I ran into you earlier." I mumble. If he werent supernatural, I doubt he would've heard me. "That's okay. I'm sorry I scared you. I heard you call for me, I should've answered you." "I didn't think you'd come." Derek doesn't reply for a moment. He looks hurt. "Why would I not come?"

"We fought earlier. I felt like maybe you were still too mad to want to deal with me." He stands, moving quickly to sit right in front of me. "No! No baby, not at all. I was never mad at you. I get mad at myself. I get furstrated. I feel like I don't know how to communicate so I get frustrated with myself and it comes out as me being mad at you. I'm sorry for that. And I promised you, years ago, that I would always protect you. So even if that means holding you during a power outage, and theres nothing to even actually protect you from, I'm going to be here. I'm always going to be here." By this point I have tears streaming down my face. Derek takes my mug and sets both his and mine on the coffee table before pulling me into his chest again. "I love you" I stutter out between sobs. "I love you so much, Derek, and I don't know what's happening to us. I don't want to lose you. I can't. I can't lose you, Der, I can't-" He cuts me off with a kiss, his hands holding either side of my face, gently stroking the tears away while he kisses me gently but firmly. I kiss back softly while my breathing regulates and the thoughts running rampant in my head finally go silent. He pulls away and rests his forhead against mine. "You will never lose me. Never, no matter what happens between us. You're my world. You're my sun and my moon. I know things have been hard for us lately. I don't know what's happening either. But I know that I love you. I know that we'll figure this out, okay? Whatever it takes. We can talk with your parents, we can try couples counseling, we can try whatever you want. I'm here. You're here. This is it, baby, you are it for me. Don't give up on me yet." he finishes his speach with his eyes closed, as if he's scared I'm going to turn around and walk away from him. "If I haven't given up on you by now, Hale, I think you're going to be stuck with me." We both smile at each other for the first time in what feels like forever. "I think I can live with that." Derek stands once more and sits behind me, his legs on either side of me. "You should close your eyes for a while, try to get some rest. I know you weren't sleeping earlier. I could hear you crying." "Don't you dare beat yourself up for that. I'm okay. We're going to be okay. That's all that matters. But you should sleep a little bit, too." "I will but not before you do. But I'll be here when you wake up, and we'll start working on things when you're ready." I don't reply; I instead take hold of Derek's hand and kiss the back of it, before readjusting and cuddling against Derek's chest. The storm won't last forever.