oranges-and-pot-noodles

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

Happy Halloween🎃🐈三 三 三

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

i'm jared, i'm 19 and i never learned how to starve

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

I hate feeling this way

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

Fat shame me please NHS

Honestly need to remind myself how far I've let myself go.

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

How many calories do we actually gain from chewing and spitting?

Say I ate half a large dominoes pizza tonight (it's Eurovision grand finale and I went for a long run before and calculated the calories of what I would binge on beforehand to prevent myself from eating too much)

The other half I managed to save for after I was alone again, and chewed and spat out. How many calories would I gain from doing chewing and spitting out the second half?

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

Ever since I've started counting calories, I realised just how much I was eating before goddammit

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

I just want to cut all the fat off of my body

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

My personal thoughts on the matter

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

My scales have been lying to me

And I haven't felt this motivated for a long time. I've become complacent and thought that 'Well if I'm never going to reach that weight what's the point of trying'. So I ballooned, and gradually lost perception of myself. I cannot stand to be in photographs more than ever.

But today I found out that my scales have been lying to me for three years.

I thought I put on 7 kg, but actually, I am at the weight I was when I was 14 when this whole thing became serious. My scale has been adding on 7kg for three. Bloody. Years.

I only found out after I got weighed at an eating disorder clinic. I cannot believe I thought I was 7kg heavier than I was for so long...!

Add in the fact that I've been naturally losing weight for the past month for no apparent reason, I feel more motivated than ever! Maybe now it's a possibility. Maybe now I can prove to myself I can control myself.

I am pumped!

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

🌙 collarbones 🌙

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

Me: *casually looking at thinspo at 2am*

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

So diet pills

Any recommendations?

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

[oranges-and-pot-noodles]

look at the time! it’s half past i hate my body more and more every day and i’ve lost all sense of self control and this is kinda starting spiral out of hand help me please