outtathisbinary

[outtathisbinary]

I want to start this off with some validation for my nonbinary audience. You are so valid, no matter how much you transition socially or medically. I know personally the discrimination you can face even without medical transitioning. I understand, and I'm here for you.

Leftists or left-leaning people are not going to make it through these next four years if we cannot stop the in-fighting and recognize nuance.

This whole debate I've seen about trans people who medically transition being the ones who face discrimination & not medically transitioning being a privilege seems (from the multiple posts I've seen on it) to really lack nuance and perspective.

There's no doubt that people who medically transition frequently face discrimination and can face more severe discrimination than others.

At the same time, I need people to know that even socially transitioning can put people at risk. It put me at risk, and I experienced physical violence for socially transitioning.

There are trans people (including nonbinary) who live in seriously backward places. I am one of them. I have not done any medical procedures, taken any hormones, or anything medical at all to transition. I use to present more "queer", playing with gender presentation, sometimes to the point of appearing "masculine". After multiple times of being harassed, I was threatened with a gun & knew I had to stop. All while never medically changing anything about myself. Of course, I'm not ignorant. I cannot imagine what it would be like for a black, visibly trans woman in my area. At the same time, that's why there aren't trans people here. The few trans people I've made connections with have left this area. When I tried to inquire about medically transitioning, no one knew what I was talking about. Even just asking about hormones, I was constantly transferred to womens' clinics with no notice because it was assumed I was a woman in need of more estrogen. When I tried to get a trans inclusive doctor, I was immediately medically marked as "female-to-male transgender". This doctor refused to hear me out about being nonbinary, tried to force me to take hormones, and when I rejected those hormones, he sent my prescription for birth control to a women's clinic (after he said he'd handle that scrip for me). After this, he even deflected my appointments to urgent care. Until recently, I had that female-to-male diagnosis on my patient chart. It was also stated I used he/him pronouns (not accurate, but still some trans visibility in my medical docs). Not a single medical professional in 7 years ever acknowledged that. The gynecologist didn't, nurses didn't, front desk attendants didn't, ER workers didn't, etc. I didn't even think that sort of thing was on my chart since no one ever acted like it was there.

This area is so bad, and it's only gotten worse under trump, that I've gotten to the point that I told my new doctor I was lying about being trans. That I was confused. Now, my female-to-male diagnosis is "resolved".

All I've been able to do is change my name. I can't mess with my presentation. People here (even so called leftists) have misgendered me because of my lack of medical transitioning or "looking like a woman".

While I'm not at all debating that trans people who are visibly trans face more discrimination, I also want these kinds of struggles and trans people to be seen. I wake up every day and have to be okay with both the fact that medically I can't transition even if I wanted to, and I can't even play with my gender presentation because it's so unsafe.

I wake up every day and am seen as someone I'm not, gendered as someone I'm not, with conversations and expectations happening around those ideas.

This can and does keep me safer than I was when I looked "queer". It also makes me feel so invisible and unseen. It's miserable being "stealth". There's privilege in that stealth, but it's also extremely damaging for the trans person who's hiding. I thought "I Saw the TV Glow" made it clear how much it hurts to not be your genuine self. That can and does apply to nonbinary people too. I hope the trans community as a whole isn't forgetting these things, or even overlooking them, while discussing trans-based discrimination.

Please remember to be kind. We've got a lot of pain ahead of all of us in these 4 years (and probably beyond, sadly).

[outtathisbinary]

[outtathisbinary]

[outtathisbinary]

Pride is not pride without including disabled queer people. 🌈

[outtathisbinary]

And a ginormous trans flag, too.

[outtathisbinary]

sorry gang im on drawfee crossposting duty until im caught up on work lol

excited to be doing trans rigs again! and ofc pride shirt and sticker are available here :3

[outtathisbinary]

Happy Pride Month

[outtathisbinary]

The 2024 Gender Census is now open!

[ Link to survey ]

The 11th annual international gender census, collecting information about the language we use to refer to ourselves and each other, is now open until 13th June 2024.

It’s short and easy, about 5 minutes probably.

After the survey is closed I’ll process the results and publish a spreadsheet of the data and a report summarising the main findings. Then anyone can use them for academic or business purposes, self-advocacy, tracking the popularity of language over time, and just feeling like we’re part of a huge and diverse community.

If you think you might have friends and followers who’d be interested, please do reblog this blog post, and share the survey URL by email or at AFK social groups or on other social networks. Every share is extremely helpful - it’s what helped us get 40,000 responses last year.

Survey URL: https://survey.gendercensus.com

The survey is open to anyone anywhere who speaks English and feels that the gender binary doesn’t fully describe their experience of themselves and their gender(s) or lack thereof.

For the curious, you can also spy on some graphs and demographic data for the incoming responses here.

Thank you so much!

[ Link to survey ]

Image credit: Malachite and rhodochrosite.

[outtathisbinary]

[outtathisbinary]

Small Life Update

Hey everyone! I just wanted to let you all know that I'm doing well. Still queer and trans and all of that jazz! My name has legally gotten changed everywhere I can change it. The Gender, whatever it may be, is going strong. I'm still here, and I hope you're all doing well. Sending you all love!!!

[outtathisbinary]

[outtathisbinary]

Happy Trans Day of Visibility 🏳️‍⚧️

[outtathisbinary]

(AUTO POST)

[outtathisbinary]

[ID: an image of a smiling man wearing sunglasses. In front of him is text that says, in all caps, "Hey comrade. Check the batch no. on your box of testosterone. If you see HAC3427A with an expiration date of 08/2023, please contact sun pharmaceuticals at 1-800 818-4555. There's a recall." End ID]

Thanks @naturalkillercyborg for the caption 🙃

[outtathisbinary]

Source: Instagram user queerdeer.design

(Clockwise: Nonbinary, asexual, abrosexual, bisexual, aromantic, intersex, queer/questioning, agender, omnisexual, polysexual, pansexual, gay/LGBT+ umbrella, lesbian, trans)

[outtathisbinary]

STAY SAFE!! [ID: the Gilbert Baker pride flag with the words “Happy pride to all those who are unable to celebrate openly and safely. You are loved and seen!” in all-caps black text over it. /end ID]

[outtathisbinary]

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

If you accidentally misgender yourself, you’re still valid. 

If you accidentally use your old name, you’re still valid. 

If you accidentally use your old pronouns, you’re still valid.

If you turn around when someone calls out your old name, you’re still valid. 

If you don’t correct someone who misgenders you, you’re still valid. 

It doesn’t mean you are fake or your gender identity is not important. 

It just means you’ve lived with your old name/pronouns for a while and so your brain got used to them, even though they didn’t represent your gender. The same way, people sometimes turn around when someone calls out a nickname they had as a toddler - which in no way means they are a toddler. Nobody would argue “You have to be a toddler, you just reacted to a childish nickname.” and that’s just how ridiculous “You have to be girl, you just reacted to a female name.” or similar is. 

You are valid. 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad