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thanks @bmoharrisbankofficial but unfortunately i can’t focus on the very important message here because i’m too busy being confused by the fact that apparently if you send an ask with only one letter tumblr will bold that letter in the “asked you” notification text?? why the fuck would that be the case

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i learned about a stupid looking bird today and i cant stop laughing

its called a crested satinbird (cnemophilus macgregorii)

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I wish Mythbusters was still around so we could see them fuck up a Cybertruck

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rolling rolling rolling

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not only are the players doing sidequests so are the audience members

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cruel and unusual that in order to do something you have to begin

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I have the copyright over being funny. Y'all get ready for your cease and desist.

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do you guys wanna get up early and get pastries and eat them in the park and lay in the grass for a while and then go for a long walk to an antique centre and wander round and hold things up and say "this is you 🫵" and then watch classic who and parallel play by working on our individual writing/art projects for the rest of the day with intermittent drink/snack breaks and none of us ever have to look at microsoft outlook or receive an email ever again

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ime you need to worry more about them when the one who can cook hasn't fronted in a while and the others have to get creative

What you don't need to worry about if you have a system friend:

Evil murder alter

What you do need to worry about:

The one who stays up too late

The one dealing with that the next morning

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normal person: im scared of bugs

hollow knight fan: im scared of the mind untethered in the state of dreaming

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Squish parasite-infected bugs

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A short thing about “weird triggers” inspired by this that I’ll end up deleting later honestly-

You can reblog this but like... don’t fuck around??? I won’t hesitate with the block button on this I swear to fuck I won’t.

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being a het-romantic ace be like

Society: You are boy

Me: Yes, am boy

Society: You like girl

Me: Yes, I like girl

Society: So you’re heterosexual

Me: Yes, want to hold girl

Society: Exactly

Me: Maybe even kiss girl

Society: Right, and then what comes after kissing?

Me: …make pasta for girl?

Society: Are… are you sure there’s not something else? Something more physical?

Me: …

Me: Be held by girl!

Society: No

Me: Yes

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pleEEEEAASSSEEE someone give Agatha GLaDOS. In under an hour she'd have GLaDOS's consciousness in a cute little six-inch robot with an extra strong laser pointer (which no one really wants her to have but Agatha refuses to take away because it keeps people on their toes), and she'd make frenemies with the Castle AND the Train.

Agatha already has a collection of evil-to-chaotic-neutral pipsqueak robots following her around. She would adore GLaDOS. If anything GLaDOS has more of a sense of diplomacy than the Castle or Train, who think subtlety is something you drink at elevensies. Her dry sense of humor would be a welcome addition.

The Castle would warm up quickly too, because GLaDOS is an expert at using hostile architecture to mess with people, and the Castle is sentient hostile architecture that can rearrange itself on a whim and messing with people is its favorite pastime.

Also Agatha would basically do that "showing my cat things he's never seen before" but it'd be, like, GLaDOS's tiny robot and a copy of the fantasy OSHA guidelines. And when GLaDOS set them on fire with her laser pointer, Agatha would cheer, because she understands evil robot enrichment.

PROPAGANDA

Agatha Heterodyne:

The main character mad scientist in a comic full of them

She's the titular Girl Genius, which is a good start. In the comic, mad science is genetic and called the Spark; she's the latest in a long line of of powerful, mostly evil Sparks who terrorized Europa for centuries, until her father and uncle became heroes instead. She's a bit in between the two extremes. Some of her greatest hits include: building a small army of self-replicating robots, briefly killing one of her romantic interests in order to cure him of a terminal illness (he thought it was a brilliant idea), repeating the procedure on herself, nearly blowing up after glimpsing the fabric of the universe, repairing the sentient castle at the heart of her town, frequently having to shuffle around brains that end up in the wrong body (they are usually happier afterwards), building a giant robot in order to ask the Godqueen of England to dance, and making coffee. At this time in the comic, she recently rescued her town from being frozen in time and is working to kill a horror from another dimension.

GLaDOS:

I LOVE GLaDOS. Such a well written and funny and interesting character. And Portal 2 is one of the best games of all time. If you haven't played it, go do that.

Never has a womans consciousness inside a robot had so much beef with a mute test subject before.

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My mother has been trying to get me to do positive affirmations and this has backfired in a very huge, but oh so very predictable way