peach-lady - Tumblr blog

[peach-lady]

she's asleep. next to me. holy shit. my bff is also here asleep next to me and he makes me feel safe and secure which is nice. but WAOH HOLY SHIT she's asleep next to me the insane butterflies i feel is enough to make me delirious wowowowow.

HOLY SHIT WOAH

We (a few friends) were talking about keeping/dropping/hyphenating last names upon marriage and HOLY SHIT FJDBSNDJDJSNDNDJJSNSF I SAID MINE WOULD BE GOOD TO HYPHENATE (ITS ONE SYLLABLE) AND SHE IMMEDIATELY SAID ALOUD OUR LAST NAMES IM KILLING MYSELF /POS

okay waosjshdbdnsebim so im gayyyyyy holy shit my heartrate. is triple rn. i think im having a panic attack.

[peach-lady]

HOLY SHIT WOAH

We (a few friends) were talking about keeping/dropping/hyphenating last names upon marriage and HOLY SHIT FJDBSNDJDJSNDNDJJSNSF I SAID MINE WOULD BE GOOD TO HYPHENATE (ITS ONE SYLLABLE) AND SHE IMMEDIATELY SAID ALOUD OUR LAST NAMES IM KILLING MYSELF /POS

okay waosjshdbdnsebim so im gayyyyyy holy shit my heartrate. is triple rn. i think im having a panic attack.

[peach-lady]

it happened again ❤️💖💖❤️💓💓💞💖💞❤️💓💞❤️💓💞💖❤️💓💞💓💞💞

Life could be a dream

She just called me a faggot 💓💖❤️💖❤️🩷💖❤️💖💞❤️

[peach-lady]

Re: Serious Talk

We haven't had a serious talk but she complimented me and she's paying attention to me specifically when we're in groups so I don't really want to touch anything in case I break it. I love her she's in my dreams. I had a dream I was post-op and on hormones for over 4 years and I woke up to her alarm and leant over her in our bed to turn it off. That's ruined me. I can't think. My friend is doing through some tough shit but I can't help because I'm useless rn. Try to think of things that help and my mind wanders back to her and saying goodbye when she goes to work after eating breakfast together. Kissing her when she gets back. I work from home and she doesn't in this scenario I've invented. We have a cat. I'm 17 rn why am I dreaming of this day and night.

[peach-lady]

Life could be a dream

She just called me a faggot 💓💖❤️💖❤️🩷💖❤️💖💞❤️

[peach-lady]

She identifies as bisexual now. Which would be fine if it weren't for the timing. I'm not enough of a woman for her. I'm a guy to her and I might be forever. I'm sad and alone and crying. She's part of my friendship group I don't know who I can turn to about this. I have maybe one friend who I feel comfortable telling. I'll talk to him. God help me.

Serious Talk

I think I need to have a Serious Talk with this girl about how we feel about each other. I just-- we didn't talk about what labels we want on the date which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

Before the date we talked about it, and while I'm pretty sure how I feel, she's never felt like this before and is scared to get my hopes up if it turns out she's wrong. Which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

But it's been a bit since our date, and everyday I fall more in love. We flirt back and forth, I text her half delirious telling her how much I love her during the night. She finds it cute and endearing. She replies to my "I am in love with you" with a "You too, pookie" half in jest, which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

I just. I want to be with her. I want to call her my girlfriend. I want her to call me her girlfriend. I want to be her girlfriend. I want her.

There's an underlying insecurity. That I'm not enough of a woman for her, or that she views me as an experiment, a foray outside of being a lesbian. I love her so much it hurts. She can't possibly feel the same way when I don't pass very well, and when it's impossible to love the way I love her.

I'm tired. And sad. And anxious, and nervous, and terrified. I need to talk to her. I just.. can't.

[peach-lady]

I think she's avoiding me. She hasnt responded to my messages and in the group chat she doesn't interact with me until it would be really weird for her not to, and then she interacts with the other things I said. The whole thing is really stilted and weird. When I flirt exactly the same as I have been (lighthearted, jokey) she shuts it down in an equally lighthearted and jokey manner. Or it reads that way anyway. I don't know. I'm sad. I feel like I'm mourning something that never was. For a first time feeling this way about somebody I'm not having a great time.

All this and still when I see her my worries dissolve and I just want to be close to her. All this and still the second she responds to a message or sends one at all, my hearts in my throat and I can't think or breathe. I'm struggling. I feel like I'm naked in the arctic when we're apart, and like I'm standing in a house fire when she's there.

God help me I just want to be perfect for her. I'd change everything about myself for her. I'd stop transitioning if that's what she wanted. I'd change my name back to what it was, I'd walk around dressed in sandpaper to make her happy. Sometimes it feels like I'm already doing that.

Anyway. I don't think I have anything else to say. I'm just sad. And alone. Goodbye for now, friend, I'll give you space.

Serious Talk

I think I need to have a Serious Talk with this girl about how we feel about each other. I just-- we didn't talk about what labels we want on the date which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

Before the date we talked about it, and while I'm pretty sure how I feel, she's never felt like this before and is scared to get my hopes up if it turns out she's wrong. Which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

But it's been a bit since our date, and everyday I fall more in love. We flirt back and forth, I text her half delirious telling her how much I love her during the night. She finds it cute and endearing. She replies to my "I am in love with you" with a "You too, pookie" half in jest, which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

I just. I want to be with her. I want to call her my girlfriend. I want her to call me her girlfriend. I want to be her girlfriend. I want her.

There's an underlying insecurity. That I'm not enough of a woman for her, or that she views me as an experiment, a foray outside of being a lesbian. I love her so much it hurts. She can't possibly feel the same way when I don't pass very well, and when it's impossible to love the way I love her.

I'm tired. And sad. And anxious, and nervous, and terrified. I need to talk to her. I just.. can't.

[peach-lady]

FRUSTRATING?? She is so unobtrusive and polite I still don't know for sure what's going on!! She said "we don't have to rush things ig" what does that mean?? At first I was just thinking okay lets not rush whatever she's comfortable with. And then I saw the "ig" and. What does that mean ???? Hello ?? Do you want to be official? Why do you only guess we shouldn't rush what do you want ???? I want to call you my girlfriend so bad..................

Serious Talk

I think I need to have a Serious Talk with this girl about how we feel about each other. I just-- we didn't talk about what labels we want on the date which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

Before the date we talked about it, and while I'm pretty sure how I feel, she's never felt like this before and is scared to get my hopes up if it turns out she's wrong. Which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

But it's been a bit since our date, and everyday I fall more in love. We flirt back and forth, I text her half delirious telling her how much I love her during the night. She finds it cute and endearing. She replies to my "I am in love with you" with a "You too, pookie" half in jest, which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

I just. I want to be with her. I want to call her my girlfriend. I want her to call me her girlfriend. I want to be her girlfriend. I want her.

There's an underlying insecurity. That I'm not enough of a woman for her, or that she views me as an experiment, a foray outside of being a lesbian. I love her so much it hurts. She can't possibly feel the same way when I don't pass very well, and when it's impossible to love the way I love her.

I'm tired. And sad. And anxious, and nervous, and terrified. I need to talk to her. I just.. can't.

[peach-lady]

Serious Talk

I think I need to have a Serious Talk with this girl about how we feel about each other. I just-- we didn't talk about what labels we want on the date which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

Before the date we talked about it, and while I'm pretty sure how I feel, she's never felt like this before and is scared to get my hopes up if it turns out she's wrong. Which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

But it's been a bit since our date, and everyday I fall more in love. We flirt back and forth, I text her half delirious telling her how much I love her during the night. She finds it cute and endearing. She replies to my "I am in love with you" with a "You too, pookie" half in jest, which is fine, I don't want to rush things.

I just. I want to be with her. I want to call her my girlfriend. I want her to call me her girlfriend. I want to be her girlfriend. I want her.

There's an underlying insecurity. That I'm not enough of a woman for her, or that she views me as an experiment, a foray outside of being a lesbian. I love her so much it hurts. She can't possibly feel the same way when I don't pass very well, and when it's impossible to love the way I love her.

I'm tired. And sad. And anxious, and nervous, and terrified. I need to talk to her. I just.. can't.

[peach-lady]

We didn't play DnD but we played like 4 boardgames ???? and it was really fun ???????????? i usually hate boardgames

Holy Shit

I'm going on a date!!! What the heck!! Diversity win lesbians kissing and playing DnD hello????

[peach-lady]

DATE WENT SO GOOD WE AGREED TO ANOTHER DATE 💘💘💖🩷💘💖💖💞

Holy Shit 2.0

So so very gay. I am so gay. Wowie! Gay. Hhhhhhbbbbhh women..

[peach-lady]

I HAVE A DATE WITH A WOMAN !!!!!! 💖💘💖💘💖💞💞

Holy Shit 2.0

So so very gay. I am so gay. Wowie! Gay. Hhhhhhbbbbhh women..

[peach-lady]

Holy Shit 2.0

So so very gay. I am so gay. Wowie! Gay. Hhhhhhbbbbhh women..

[peach-lady]

Holy Shit

I'm going on a date!!! What the heck!! Diversity win lesbians kissing and playing DnD hello????

[peach-lady]

When you touch me, my heart flutters so much that it may as well be the same butterflies I get when I talk to you.

Might be a clueless lesbian

Just realised I may, in fact, have a girlfriend? We joke about being married and sometimes I say to her "If you keep that up I'll be forced to ask you for a date" and she does, in fact, keep that up. That being stroking my hair, hugging me by the waist (from behind) and holding my face. I also do these things to her but I was under the impression it was part of the bit, y'know, of being married. But maybe it's not???

[peach-lady]

Might be a clueless lesbian

Just realised I may, in fact, have a girlfriend? We joke about being married and sometimes I say to her "If you keep that up I'll be forced to ask you for a date" and she does, in fact, keep that up. That being stroking my hair, hugging me by the waist (from behind) and holding my face. I also do these things to her but I was under the impression it was part of the bit, y'know, of being married. But maybe it's not???

[peach-lady]

You won't believe what happens next!

Actually she just started talking about how cool gengar is, I love her :)