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dont piss me off. next time you go on a trip im filling your house with galapagos finches. by the time you return, they've evolved to fill your niche. they're a better spouse to your partner. they're a better parent for your child. and? they're a better friend to me than you ever were.

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night in tokyo

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behind the scenes photos of season 5 episode 3 (Margaret’s Engagement), Alan Alda golfing with an orange. 1976

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goodbye to the friends i've had.

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everything hawk says in this episode is like designed to make me clutch my chest in anguish and say oh noooooooo. its funny that he says this a lot not just this episode but the whole 'theyre just babies' thing is a recurring line he uses. something about hawk and babies. of course.

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i love that one chappell roan song

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"I think I hauve covid" is sort of the modern man's anime nosebleed

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couldnt find any good reaction images online

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i havent the faggiest idea what youre talking about

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gnawing at the steel bars of my enclosure which i built myself

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you used to be able to play games on cartoonnetwork.com . . . now every company's website wants to give you spyware and spread corporate propaganda but I REMEMBER when you could play a BEN 10 adventure game in-browser without so much as giving away your e-mail. people's heads should be on pikes for this

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hawkeye doods

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How to get ready in the morning

Step 1: Stay in bed as long as you possibly can. 

Step 2: Speed run. 

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welcome to my epic fantasy world. we have many developed fantasy kingdoms with 2000 years of rich lore and history. and to the south you can see the evil sand people and to the east theres japanchina.

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what? oh sweetheart no, you're not weirding me out at all. you're weirding me in. keep talking, freak

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scanning the food in my pantry and fridge until the little umpire in my head goes “SSSAFE!”