hey my names Phinn (he/him), I'm 19 y/o, trans and pansexual, a history major, and a writer
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this is from a loooong time ago but i forgot to post it here
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its hard to play the 'what fear would your self-insert be an avatar of :D' game with me because I'm unavoidably marked by the buried and its like the lamest fucking one what am i even supposed to do with this. guy covered in dirt???
#YOOOOO FELLOW BURIED AVATAR HOLY SHIT#HELL YEAH#the buried my beloved they could never make me forget ab you <3#tma#reblogs
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i hate you summer i hate you heat i hate you sweating i hate you burning sun i hate you warm weather i hate you climate change
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its occurring to me that i might not actually hate geography and just thought that bc every time i had to do geography as a kid it entailed perfectly colouring in and labelling a map of canada
#for non-canadian people seeing this#you ever see all those little islands off nunavut?#yeah try colouring each and every one of those in. with shitty grade school pencil crayons.#also trying to label any of the maritime provinces is actually hell#btw im thinking about this bc im looking into if i can declare 2 minors to go along w my major#and i think geography would overall be a good choice for anything having to do w history#but especially since im going into teaching#i also may or may not have had a mild existential crisis last night over the fact that if i find myself not wanting to get into teaching#theres basically nothing else for me to do with my degree#so now im like. what minor would support a different career that goes along with history?#i could do public policy since that would help with archiving and other government shit#but also. thats an offshoot of polisci. i dont wanna be associated with those guys.#ughhhhhhhhhh whatever ill figure it out#ramblings
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martin, for all his faults, at least knows when he's being self-destructive. he is acutely aware, even. jon, on the other hand, will look directly at daisy and say "it's all very rational, my back up plan for if I couldn't get you out of the coffin was that it would just kill me and if that didn't happen I was hoping that you'd just kill me."
#hey okay so uh. that last line? why would you do that to me#all of this is so true though#martin is incredibly aware when hes being self destructive#and hes also hyperaware of how it not only hurts himself but also others around him#he knows that what hes doing in s4 will most likely kill him#and he knows that in various ways his self isolation is damaging every other person around him too#(ex. him and melanie had a brief moment of bonding at the end of s3. if he had stuck around they may have become friends#which in turn could have led to many other more positive outcomes for them both)#(and it goes without saying that obviously jon needs him)#but on the other hand jon doesnt have that self awareness#this man has not shown compassion to himself a day in his life#even in mag81 he was justifying why each person in his life as a child was right to mistreat/ignore him#even by the end of s2 he clearly has reached a point where he doesnt think hes deserving if life because of things that are “his fault”#(ie. sasha dying and him not realizing it)#in s3 he repeatedly risks his life bc hes desperately trying to make up for the fact that someone else lost theirs#and by s4 he doesnt even think he needs a reason to be deserving of death. i think he thinks its evident#but at the end of the day hes not even making these connections himself#he just thinks hes behaving appropriately in his situation#instead of. yknow. acknowledging that hes suicidal.#owie#tma#tma spoilers#reblogs
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#additions aside#why is the original post one of the funnieat fucking memes ive seen all week#reblogs
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*banjo plays in backround*
*cowboy voice* this blog ain't big enough fo' the both of us *Tumblr weed tumbles by*
#this post has the energy of one with 50k notes from 2016#i mean this both as a compliment and also confusion at how this post was never made before now#reblogs
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there is something so crazy and powerful about having art of your oc that was made by anyone other than yourself. like oh my god you actually exist outside of my own brain that's WILD
#will forever be with toby fox#what an iconic individual#but also yeah my friends have made art of my characters before and it makes me feel like im gonna cry and scream and throw up#i get so excited#writing#reblogs
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daily affirmations: at least I'm no longer 14
#related to last post tbh#i think i was 15 by the time that game came out but i cant be sure#reblogs
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broooooooooooo steam had RE8 on sale for $12 so i got it and i just played up until the first checkpoint and its so good omfg im so glad i actually get to play it myself
#i immediately watched several playthroughs of the game on youtube the second it came out#and at the time i definitely would not and could not have played it#but now im so hyped bc im loving it so far#i have just vague enough recollections of watching ppl play that it helps guide me but doesnt ruin the experience#i still get to explore and shit and godddddddd its so good#RE8 was my comfort game for a solid year after it came out#like it fucking carried me through a LOT of shit#so actually getting to play it has me grinning like an idiot#ramblings#re8 village#re8
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I have a “Magnus park.” There is a park I walked to a lot while listening to TMA for research. To this day when I go I think: “oh this is bench I sat on when Mike Crew showed up. Here is the rock I stood by when Jon smashed up the table. Here is the tree I sat under while I listened to Elias Bouchard bludgeon Jurgen Leitner’s skull into a bloody pulp with a lead pipe.”
Ah, memories.
#me but with the entire map of legend of zelda breath of the wild#im not kidding thats what i played fhe whole time i listend to the show#i walk to the temple on the great plateau and im like hm#ah yes#the bone turners tale#!!#of course#tma#reblogs
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was going through some of my health records and some doctor put “dresses oddly” next to my psychotic symptoms. hey fuck you too man
#no bc one of my best friends once had a psychiatrist note the fact that they had dyed hair as a symptom of bpd#i also was once told by a psychiatrist that i had bpd (i do not) because i was trans#i had a psychiatrist appointment today and i actively decided not to wear a skirt (even though i kinda wanted to since its rly hot out rn)#bc i didn't want my psychiatrist to think it was like. a symptom of mental instability or something.#like no bestie im not exhibiting traits of a mental disorder i just Like Clothes#i cant even begin to imagine how youd get treated wearing ACTUALLY eccentric clothing (not just like. vaguely unique clothes like i do lol)#reblogs
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What are your opinions on anything at all
not a fan personally
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love it when a queer character's identity is the least interesting thing about them. like yes she's trans but that's less plot-relevant than the fact she's a wanted fugitive on 6 different planets
#hes trans and pan but he also died less than 24 hours ago and has not had a moment of peace since#so i think our focus should be on that#writing#reblogs
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"preferred name" "preferred pronouns" um NO? there's my real name and my real pronouns. apparently you are using some fake evil version?
usually im in favor of evil versions of things but yikes that's rank you skank
#“preferred pronouns” is such bullshit like#no im pretty sure those are the only ones#who told you there were more?#reblogs
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"just write a little every day" ok but what if i write nothing for 3 weeks and then suddenly type like i’m being hunted by god
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