pixelyoshi314

[pixelyoshi314]

when people my age make films about how depressing and lame it is to be doing nothing in your mid 20s im like well you just directed a movie so you cant possibly understand

[pixelyoshi314]

« Don’t worry, I’m sure they haven’t forgot about inviting you guys. Just wait a little ok? »

[pixelyoshi314]

I know that some British people take umbrage at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.

American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.

Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.

[pixelyoshi314]

Monsters are often a metaphor for toxic/dangerous/abusive people in your life, but don't be fooled! Monsterfuckers are NOT trying to fuck those people. Monsterfuckers are trying to fuck the metaphor. They're trying to metaphuck and monsterfuck at the same time, and we must keep letting them get away with it!

Meanwhile Gregor is attempting the opposite. Gregor is a monster fucker (note the space!) attempting to fuck the actual toxic/dangerous/abusive people in your life to keep them occupied so they don't bother you and so nobody else fucks them by mistake. Whether we should let Gregor keep getting away with this heroic act of depravity is nuanced.

[pixelyoshi314]

Fryes turn…

[pixelyoshi314]

of course you have blue curtains and subtext

[pixelyoshi314]

dumbstupid unpolished comic pride month go. love to all

epilogue:

[pixelyoshi314]

Officially licensed 2000 Donkey Kong Country cartoon series plush with a unique expression, from Japan.

Main Blog | Patreon | Twitter | Bluesky | Small Findings | Source

[pixelyoshi314]

Commission for @sunbunfleur !!

[pixelyoshi314]

do you think bananza is nintendo's attempt to retcon donkey kong the third into being the original donkey kong. i know we have to wait until the full game comes out to know for sure but it kinda looks like that's what's going on

possibilities for why Pauline looks like a child in Donkey Kong Bananza, in no particular order

this is an explicit retcon of the RareWare lore. Cranky Kong is no longer the original Donkey Kong

Nintendo has been operating under the assumption that Cranky Kong's grandson always has been the original Donkey Kong this entire time and has literally never considered the lore RareWare established in the 90s to be canon

this is an explicit retcon of Nintendo's own lore. Pauline is no longer considered the same person as the Lady from Donkey Kong. (this, on its own, would not actually count as a confirmation that Super Mario is not Little Mario the Jumpman, but the most annoying fan theorists would take it as confirmation anyway)

it's not even the same Pauline as the one from Mario vs Donkey Kong and Super Mario Odyssey, she just has the same name and looks similar and is also a singer

this game isn't a prequel. Pauline has just been turned into a child the same way she was turned into a rock

time travel is a thing that exists in the Mario universe

continuity is not a thing that exists in the Mario universe

Donkey Kong is an unreliable narrator and all humans look like children to him

the game ends the same way as Super Mario USA. like, literally the same way, complete with credits listing the name of every enemy from Doki Doki Panic except a couple of them are accidentally swapped

[pixelyoshi314]

[pixelyoshi314]

I assure you: somebody, somewhere, is on the exact same wavelength as you are.

[pixelyoshi314]

I know people aren't here for the news, but trans folks, I'm thinking of you tonight and how you deserve better.

[pixelyoshi314]

i want to talk about my ocs but im literally this image. i got nothing

[pixelyoshi314]

is there any chance of a full version of "Spider D.A.N.C.E." or does it already exist somewhere

here's a longer version, but i'm not calling it Spider D.A.N.C.E. because my pal Jenny already took that one

This was recorded entirely in FUSER, thanks to mods authored by IFoundTheE and MalwHare

[pixelyoshi314]

[pixelyoshi314]

He would've named himself Void Kong, but that name was already taken

the dk rap but it doesn’t stop at the end it just keeps going naming new kongs thay are increasingly obscure and scary until you get an absolute abomination kong