polinar-13 - Tumblr blog

[polinar-13]

I am back bitches!!! I thought I wouldn’t but self destruction is a cozy place when the world outside is on fire

[polinar-13]

Me after any minor inconvenience:

[polinar-13]

You don’t wanna be skinnier, you wanna destroy yourself hopping it would end up killing you

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I must confess i liked and still liking being skinny

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[polinar-13]

ult masterpost

1. HYGIENE

do your skincare routine every single mornin' and night.

take shower everyday.

shave your armpits everyday.

shave your legs every week *less if its winter*.

brush teeth twice a day.

do your hair routine every day, including washing routine every two days.

always apply deodorant and perfume or perfume mist.

once a week do a whole spa routine. *nail care, mask sheets, peelings and more deep treatments.*

try to moistruize your skin everyday

2. APPEARANCE

always look presentable in public.

always when in public apply at least conceler, or bb cream and so on.

always dress nicely.

keep your hair done, even if just stretched or curled.

keep your nails filed and clean, better if painted.

always wear minimalistic jewellery.

keep yourself shaved.

3. ETIQUETTE

never speak too loudly.

never scream or argue with someone.

be delicate with everything.

be patient be polite and nice to everyone. always say hello to your neighbour teachers, friends when you pass on streets.

smile often.

never talk with full mouth.

keep your elbows off the table when you eat.

do small talk;

2. How to start? Here are some basic phrases: Have you done anything intresting this weekend? Im looking forwars for weekend. Do you too? Have you any intresting plans? You did so great today at class! Is something bothering you? You look worried/sad/tired You have so nice t-shirt/make-up/ hairstyle // I love your hair/make-up/ phone case etc. "just compliment someone it always works, you can ask them after where did they bought it, or where got inspiration if its hairstyle or make-up

Try to make people talk about what they want to talk, not what you want to talk. That will make them think, your intrested in their lives, and people just like to talk about themselves

4. Be warm, and try to make people comfortable while they with you, don't run out with you eyes try to lock your eyes with one your talking with

3. Be open and don't judge

5. Gesticulate. Don't stand with your hands not moving, and head stead. It makes you look stressed and unnatural.

6. See the beauty in every single person

7. Share your life with others, but try not to focus conversation just on you. Look at point

8. Build trust.

9. If you have things in common show them that, and talk about it. (my tip are TV series, I mean I watched probably every single show, so to find the one in common with somebody isn't that hard. Also kpop or oder music genre is thing you can converse about a lot. )

be a good friend:

reply to messeges.

2. Be a good listener, try to maintain eye contact, and don't interrupt.

Be a best friend to others at first.

1. think more about them than about yourself, be for them not for yourself*

3. Be honest

4. Keep what your friends say to you in secret.

5. Be loyal, and stand up for your friends.

6. Be supportive, try to give advice.

7. Keep messaging them, give them your attention.

8. Say nice things about your friends to other people.

9. Compromise. Never argue.

10. Be open.

pay attention to your family.

think before you speak.

be helpful.

dont complain too much.

dont overshare.

4. SCHOOL

at class always pay attention, try to write everything down, try to be active.

do your homework the day it was given.

do your notes after every lesson, be sistematic.

dont skip important lessons. be minimim 10 minutes earlier to every class.

always give your essays in first termin. do all extras.

go to dentist every 6 months.

study minimum for hour every day.

5. ORGANZATION

go to hairdresser every 3 months.

keep your room clean - vaccum every week and every two weeks change the sheets.

pack your bag day before classes.

every sunday plan your meals and outfits for the rest of week.

try to go out at least once a week.

try not to eat when alone.

dont eat anything until you dont count and write down the calories.

6. FOOD

drink at least one cup of green tea a day.

dont overeat.

eat between 500-1000 kcal

[polinar-13]

I wish I could sleep forever

[polinar-13]

i thought i was dead

i had a experience today where my body overheated i started to lose focus in my schoolwork my heart started beating so loud and fast and hurting like a mf and i thought “omg this is it this is how i die i am going to die in the middle of art class” then i decided to try to alert someone i tapped my friends thigh my breathing was shaky and loud and my face was red and tried to tell her “get the teacher somethings happening” all that came out was a scrambled mumbled sentence and i thought i was about to faint but she understand and the teacher got her to take me real quick and since she knew i was anorexic she got a proteing bar and made me eat that shit and the second i took a bite everything slowly started to calm down and i have honestly never been more terrified

dont take life for granted as someone with an ed it doesnt matter whether your bmi is high or low your heart can stop at any second

[polinar-13]

i thought i was dead

i had a experience today where my body overheated i started to lose focus in my schoolwork my heart started beating so loud and fast and hurting like a mf and i thought “omg this is it this is how i die i am going to die in the middle of art class” then i decided to try to alert someone i tapped my friends thigh my breathing was shaky and loud and my face was red and tried to tell her “get the teacher somethings happening” all that came out was a scrambled mumbled sentence and i thought i was about to faint but she understand and the teacher got her to take me real quick and since she knew i was anorexic she got a proteing bar and made me eat that shit and the second i took a bite everything slowly started to calm down and i have honestly never been more terrified

dont take life for granted as someone with an ed it doesnt matter whether your bmi is high or low your heart can stop at any second

[polinar-13]

Strangers notice my lack of eating and show more concern than people I see everyday. People close to me don’t realize I’m struggling but am too worried to ask for help.

Me: *doesn’t eat*

Friends: *lives their lives, eats and even tries to offer seconds*

Me: *hasn’t even taken a bite and offers it to someone else*

Friends: *takes the bait, questions nothing and returns to their conversations*

Depression: See, no one cares enough to take notice. But that’s okay, cause we notice. We see you.

Ana: yeah, now drink more water. Maybe you’ll feel better when you’ve dropped a few lbs.

Anxiety: let’s think of a worse case scenario to ease the hurt of reality.

[polinar-13]

Strangers notice my lack of eating and show more concern than people I see everyday. People close to me don’t realize I’m struggling but am too worried to ask for help.

Me: *doesn’t eat*

Friends: *lives their lives, eats and even tries to offer seconds*

Me: *hasn’t even taken a bite and offers it to someone else*

Friends: *takes the bait, questions nothing and returns to their conversations*

Depression: See, no one cares enough to take notice. But that’s okay, cause we notice. We see you.

Ana: yeah, now drink more water. Maybe you’ll feel better when you’ve dropped a few lbs.

Anxiety: let’s think of a worse case scenario to ease the hurt of reality.

[polinar-13]

[polinar-13]

I did it guys!! Made it through the night without eating :)) 12 hours through my fast

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To The Bone (2017)

(not sure who made these so message if they are yours and I’ll credit)

[polinar-13]

Depression in summer is weird. It’s not dark and brooding, for me - it’s white and hazy and confusing. You feel very absent from everyone and everything and all the light seems a little too bright for your tired eyes.

[polinar-13]

[polinar-13]