prcscklg

[prcscklg]

i dont have plans on stopping my self harming. i know its bad and i should stop but i personally dont have the drive nor the reason to do so. i tried stopping and i went 4 days but i cant do it.

[prcscklg]

so i was watching some videos on tiktok right and i was feeling pretty happy and shit. i got pretty bored so i stood up and wanted to 'help' my sister with frying some samgyupsal bc that was what we were eating for dinner and the bitch had the audacity to fucking shout at me and told me to not eat so i got angry of course then i went back to sitting down getting agitated and wanting to kill myself bc my fucking mother took her fucking side so i was lying there all angry at everything and then i got angry about myself for getting pissed over such a small matter. then they called me for dinner and i was pissed so i didnt go and then the i started thinking about how fat i fucking am how i should starve myself bc i eat way too much and now im crying and thinking about self harming and killing myself again.

so anyways, my mental instability i guess isnt that obvious or my mother just doesnt care about me, so ive never been taken to the psychiatrist, which means ive never gotten a diagnosis so idk what my problem is. k thats all. imma go and self harm now bye