punkwife - Tumblr blog

[punkwife]

Gonna start the raskolnikov diet, will not elaborate

[punkwife]

“ Shixiong's mom has got it going on" is absolute gold

I picture Ming Fan as the perfect teacher's pet, not in an ass kisser way, but in a was-born-for-this kind of way. If the authority figure is a cruel sneering villain, he is a cruel little minion hunched over rubbing his hands on the corner. If the authority figure is an old man with mommydaddy vibes, he's the neighborhood's untainable MILF's son who clearly wants the cool Martial Arts champion to be his new dad and not you, I'm going to tell mom you hit me you little shit.

Unfortunately in the last scenario his aspiring stepdad is his little shit of pseudo (martial) brother, who wrote a poem titled something that Ming Fan interpreted as "Shixiong's mom has got it going on" which thankfully flew right above Shizun's head. Ming Fan just KNOWS that if Luo Binghe asked Shizun if they could marry pretty please Shizun would sigh and accept but only because Binghe has been such a diligent and filial disciple and he deserves a reward. And Ming Fan is not unaware of how incestuous he makes it sound, but you don't live here you don't know what he's going through.

He tried to keep Luo Binghe's grubby paws away from his shimei, but he focused so much on guarding the cabbage patch he didn't see Luo Binghe sneak past and towards the farmer's house!

Thank Heavens the farmer is so far removed from mortal issues he doesn't notice the beast he collared wants to be his house wife.

So Ming Fan, instead of a little henchman, becomes an anxiety riddled teenager, seeing gold diggers hiding in every corner. Ning Ying Ying tuts and tells him he's being ridiculous, to which Luo Binghe shakes his head and says:

"No, no. I see them too."

[punkwife]

actually my favorite ship dynamic is "i could kill you" and "i would let you"

[punkwife]

Cannon

I think, on some level, that Shen Yuan is like enrichment for Airplane Bro's enclosure. I think Airplane Bro kind of fucking LOVES having this guy around. Like, I do think their relationship is nuanced, weird and full of contradictions and not always good for them, but I also think that some chaotic part of Shang Qinghua honestly likes having his #1 hater weirdo running around completely fucking up his world.

Shen Qingqiu, grabbing Shang Qinghua by the shoulders: "Why didn't anyone TELL ME that Binghe is GAY NOW?! I'm going to die because of MONSTER DICK?!?!?!"

Shang Qinghua: (internally, probably only half-consciously) "Incredible. Amazing. How did I live without you? You torture me with your bullshit. You complete me in every possible way. I think we might be soulmates and we should make out about it. I hate you. I love you. You mean nothing to me and everything to me. This isn't your story and you stole it from me. I wrote this for you without even knowing you existed. You are a fascinating mystery that I will never solve. I will throw you under the bus at the first opportunity and yet I can't stop risking my life to help you. Your stupid game of gay murder chicken with my emotionally and mentally unstable protagonist is going to destroy the world and kill us all and I've never felt more alive. You have changed me as a person. Let's do this forever."

Shang Qinghua: (out loud) "Lol, sucks to be you, bro. At least you can get laid."

[punkwife]

Omg…..😍😍😍😍

Shen Qingqiu, sword and fan dance

Brand new art.

[punkwife]

Wangxian

connection

[punkwife]

HES SO HAPPY AHEJEJQKAJEHWJWH

you don’t know how much i begged for this picture and it’s finally here. yoongi balancing plushies on his head is very personal to me.

[punkwife]

Im a psychic but nobody can tell because of my massive boobie limiters

shout out to the theory that the reason kuriko doewnt have limiters is because since thats Saikis “original” form he has more comtrol of his body (as seen by him saying that when hes shapeshifted he generally has less control over his own body) thats just canon to me now

[punkwife]

HOLY SHIT YOU DREW THE UNTAMED VERSION SO PERFECTLY IT LOOKS JUST LIKE XIAO ZHAN

MDZS!Wangxian meeting their CQL selves!

I believe CQL!Wangxian would be kinda surprised to find out they are actual husbands in the MDZS universe.. but of course, they are soulmates!!

Meanwhile MDZS!Wangxian just don't care, they love each other and are happy as long as they are with their beloved ❤️💙

[punkwife]

Wei wuxian loudly tells everyone embarrassing baby stories

Lan Sizhui is too good and polite a child to say "OMG DADS STAHP YOU EMBARRASS MEEEE". But it's also cause he loves them too much 🥺❤️🥺

(This was p4tre0n reward from July 2021)

[punkwife]

Rough summer break, went to war

POV: you meet the guy you used to trade contraband with during the cloud recesses student exchange program again after the sun shot campaign

[punkwife]

THE BINGHE PUPPY AND THE CUCUMBER STICKER OMG

Two pictures taken before disaster

[punkwife]

If ur dick is smaller than my platforms then DONT talk to me

[punkwife]

Theres a hot milf at the park everyday and i want her so bad istg

[punkwife]

Im gayer

I'm back with another crack meme, let's see how well this one does

If it does as well as my New Yorker Post then I'll make a navigation list for the memes :D

Bonus:

[punkwife]

The zhuzhi-fication of sqq

Sort of a SVSSS snerson (snake person) au

[punkwife]

I LOVE ZHUZHILANG

When it's ur turn to watch the baby but u also want to read your weird novels

#zzlweek23 Day 7: protection/timing