randomplotgenerator

[randomplotgenerator]

Character A: GREEN FOODS AREN’T REAL!

Character B (confused): You had green beans for lunch...

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They didn't have a destination wedding; their wedding was a destination.

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[image description: A close-up photo of shattered automotive safety glass still holding together. A section on the bottom left of the frame has fallen out and wrinkled, clear plastic is visible in the open space.]

[randomplotgenerator]

Character A: So I'd like to know...

Character B (interrupting): I want a lawyer.

Character A (surprised, hesitant): I'm not a cop. You don't need a lawyer.

Character B: You have a lawyer; I want a lawyer.

Character A (exasperated): That's my [husband/wife/partner]. We're at the kitchen table. Your [father and I/mother and I/parents] just want to know where you'd like to go for your birthday dinner.

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Temperature: 21°F / -6.1°C

Wind chill: 7.5°F / -13.6°C

Visibility: .25 mile / .4 km

The shelter of the stadium is in sight. Can you make it?

Photo credit: @malevolentdadjokes

[image description: A hockey stadium stands in the background, its shape just visible through heavy fog. Deep snow is visible in the midground. A lone, young, bare tree is in the foreground, before a wide sidewalk and snow-covered grass.]

[randomplotgenerator]

Character A (about to defend themselves): Listen...

Character B (eyebrow raised, after a long pause): Yes?

Character A: Just wait, I'll think of something.

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Character A (cheerful): I like warm hugs!

Character B (blandly, to babysitter): He means he likes when we put his straight jacket in the dryer for a few minutes before putting it on him.