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   LEA NEXEI   

     Blurry, unorganized, and awkward yet bright, happy and warm. These are words that come to my mind when I describe myself that makes me one of a kind. My dad named me after chemical elements so this makes me more unique than others because having chemicals as a name is unheard of in this word. But as I grow I realized I am a basic type of person, maybe more basic than other people. I prefer staying at home, reading and drinking milo than going out and exploring the city with my family and friends—in short, I live a boring and simple life.  A life that I will still choose to live even if I have been given another shot in life because despite its simplicity and lack of thrilling adventures, I am happy and contended with what I have and am now.

     First impressions from strangers are hard because they see me as someone who is intimidating and unapproachable but I don’t blame them in seeing me that way because as my father’s daughter, I have inherited his strong willingness and courage that sometimes rub the wrong way with the people around me. I struggle making new friends because of this and only some who are patient in knowing me, stays. Nonetheless, I love having these characteristics in me for this also became my shield to those people who are keen in making people feel small about themselves.  Another part of myself that I want to share is my love for stationery and art. Since I was a child, I love anything that is composed of pencil and paper.

     Writing and drawing were and still are my favorite hobbies that even my brother’s books and notebooks were filled with my childish doodles and as I grew, I collected various stationery items—stickers, notebooks, colored papers, markers, and etc. My mom got angry when she found out my large collection of stationery because all were bought using my allowance (my parents’ money) but this didn’t stop me in having more. I learned modern calligraphy when I was in ninth grade which made my mom consider my “addiction” and let me be. Now, I am exploring the art of bullet journaling, a planner designed and made by me for me. This hobby became my escape from stress and problems but this further fueled my desire to collect more stationery and telling (more like convincing) myself that this helps me in improving my skills when it comes to bullet journaling.

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stop running for nothing, my friend 

sunflower by rex orange county 

link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sifPKltTeq4

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THE DAY I FOUND YOU

When I look up in the sky with wonder  I can’t help but think, where are you? As waking hours and sleepless nights pass  Thinking hopelessly of our paradise. Forever in utopia where the sun smiles always  And a day filled with love and euphoria. 

It was that time when I felt love and euphoria  Eyes hold such sparkle as I stare with wonder  The whole of you makes my heart swell always  Days and nights are thoughts of you.  Can I now experience the so called paradise?  At the same time, I felt fear letting this pass.

I still dream of love as our days pass  With you, our moments bring euphoria  For we are caged in our own paradise  Both of us remain in love and in wonder  Let no season wither my love for you  In every heartbeat, I knew you’re my always.

I know it’s not unicorns and rainbows always  Teach our hearts to learn how to let it pass Each and every moment sated with euphoria  Any memory would be composed of you Our everyday is forever a thrill and wonder  The world will be our personal paradise. 

Destiny has its ways in creating paradise  It’s amazing magic, tie different bonds always Our souls are struck by awe and wonder  Do not let this attachment pass.  A chance to finally experience euphoria  The ride not everyone is willing to have with you. 

Now that I am in front of you  Take my hand to have our imperfect paradise  Yet, I promise you, it will be a sail of euphoria  Combined trust and loyalty will be our guide always  For our struggles and problems to pass  And our story will leave others in wonder. 

If I were to describe euphoria, it’s simply you.  This is how love makes wonder, creation of every unique paradise  True love may not be happy always, but it will last until you both pass.

picture source: https://naide-bessa.tumblr.com/image/112950194777

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SANA’Y MAGING ALIKABOK NA LANG SA HANGIN

Bawat sambit ng pangungulila sa iyong pagtingin Aking sinta, o ‘kay hirap mong kalimutan Sana’y maging alikabok na lang sa hangin

Kung pwede lang ipasa ang mga damdamin Iparamdam ang pagkabasag ng pusong nasasaktan Bawat sambit ng pangungulila sa iyong pagtingin

Marami na akong sinabing mga panalangin Ngunit ang pinakahinihiling ng kaluluwang nahihirapan Sana’y maging alikabok na lang sa hangin

Naisin ko mang humanap ng iba, ikaw pa rin Palayain mo aking pagmamahal sa ginawang kulungan Bawat sambit ng pangungulila sa iyong pagtingin

Katangi-tangi ang iyong pagmamahal sa akin  Ginapos sa alaalang mapanakit ang puso’t isipan Sana’y maging alikabok na lang sa hangin

Dumaan man ang mga araw, ako’y naniniwala pa rin Lahat ng pasanin ay mayroong hangganan Bawat sambit ng pangungulila sa iyong pagtingin Sana’y maging alikabok na lang sa hangin

picture source: https://www.pinterest.ph/pin/691443349021445653/?nic=1

                      : https://www.pinterest.ph/pin/825706912910146653/

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see you soon our white balloon :)

picture source: https://www.deviantart.com/yoliyoli/art/Serendipity-Jimin-BTS-749231333

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Sonnet 11:11

You are me and I am you in this world 

Filled with love yet aspiring to be loved 

A melting candle to the warmth of words 

But scars of despair feel too deeply carved 

In these fields of hearts, we find it hard 

When heart of others want only pleasure 

Fondness of flesh puts love in its graveyard 

Now, profound love seems to have a measure 

Yet these genuine and heartfelt feelings 

Still found its fated way to those who seek 

Destiny made the routes of these meetings 

Connections that lasts until they’re antique 

At the end of the night, we come to see 

Love within us is our happiness key  

picture source: https://www.pinterest.ph/pin/687924911805729042/

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Kasintahan

Kung sa puso titignan

Tila isang karayom

Sa malwag na damuhan

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the cycle of breaking the hearts (yet it builds the new ones)

picture source: https://www.pinterest.ph/pin/630222541583464635/

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I miss having a cat :(

picture source: https://weheartit.com/entry/324855945

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EAGER BEAVER

Anticipation crawling on my skin like a snake awaiting for its victim

To instill fear unto my mind that it seems almost impossible to believe

For this boat of aspirations seem amazingly normal for a simple girl like me

But the process of achieving makes me realize that its all wishful thinking

Maybe they belong with the stars together with the moon and sun

Shining so bright, they blind me but can never be owned by anyone who admires them

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NEXEI

Night is when I spill the secrets that only my walls could keep

Eavesdropping to the crack and whimper of my heart as I weep

Xenon used in lights is ironic for a name, for light is not how I describe me

Express happiness like it's doomsday today, just not to show how weak

Incredible soul thriving for peace that embodies the calmness of the sea

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Pangarap kong pag-ibig

Lunurin ang damdamin

O 'kay hirap abutin

Pagmamahal sa sarili

Kasing taas ng bituin

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Embrace

Your voice brings me warmth

Reminds thee of summer breeze

But then, it passes

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Heartbeats are feelings we won't utter

Like a buzzing bee drawn to a flower.

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Hello!

Paradise in You is a poem blog designed and created to express my individuality and journey in finding me. The blog’s title was inspired by two Korean songs entitled “Paradise” and “Magic Shop” from the album Love Yourself: Tear by BTS. You might want to check them out! :) 

CREDITS

All pictures, gifs, and any media used to contribute and provide visual appearance and aesthetic appeal to this blog are credited and copyrighted to their rightful owners. 

Check the bottom of each media used for their respective citation.