reallifefitchick-blog

[reallifefitchick-blog]

So so so much food! Luckily I was very active too! But vacation mode didn't exactly go as planned. I felt sick, sore, bloated, disappointed and ashamed that I would do that to myself. But I also ate way less than I used to. And drank WAY less. And I moved more. So small victories are still victories and I just had to keep reminding myself of that. I am wrapping up a 2 day vegan cleanse and the bloat is gone and I feel so much better. I am getting back to my routine and giving myself a fucking break for letting loose!

[reallifefitchick-blog]

I did my first 10k today and I crushed it!!! I smashed my goal and finished 15 minutes before my intended time! And of course I celebrated with nachos! I'm exhausted and sore but it was so exhilarating and empowering! I ever imagined I'd be able to tackle hills, cows and trails the way I did today. I have blisters and my feet and hips are screaming, but my drive screams louder! On to the next goal!

[reallifefitchick-blog]

For the ❤️ of Nachos

My starting weight back in 2000 something or other was 242lbs. I was unhealthy, unhappy, insecure and ready to change my life. And so I did. I took it to the extreme and 2 years and 104lbs later I was 138 and crushing every goal. I even made it to the Tampa Tribune for extreme weight loss without surgery. I was finally in that size 8 (no double digit sizing for me!) and even though I'd never need those size 22's again, I held on to them. I sometimes put them on to remind me they didn't fit because despite the huge success and obvious loss- I didn't always see it. I still hid under baggy clothes and coverups on the beach. After all, in my head I was still a big girl. I was chubby and unable to wear certain things. I wasn't strong and firm... I was still flabby. Pale. Large. I stopped getting my period. My hair started falling out. I worked out like my life depended on it and counted every single calorie taken in and burned. It was exhausting. It was WORK-every minute of every day and despite all my efforts... my head never caught quite caught up to where by body was. I was never really happy. And if I heard one more comment about it being my height and body type... all 5'8 of me was ready to implode. Fast forward a few years and I had learned how to relax. I learned really well... really fast. I focused on being happy and free of damaging negativity. What made me happy? NACHOS! Watching movies instead of going to the gym! Cooking! Meeting the most dope guy on the planet and him opening my eyes to what food could be and introducing me to the best restaurants in Tampa and beyond! Travel! Craft beer and not so cheap wine paired with cheese plates and decadent slices of carrot cake. Sleeping in snuggled up to my true love and not hitting the gym. Well hello 50lbs you came back hella fast! Fat and happy isn't just a catch-phrase. That shit is real and that shit comes on like a freight train! Fast forward a couple more years and a move to Colorado. Being homesick and surrounded by everything about the great outdoors consumes me and all the sudden that 50lbs is as far away as home itself. Trails right in my backyard allowed me to eat healthy but splurge on the weekends and staying active and dedicated to my routine was working wonders. I even got to below my lowest weight and hit 133 on my wedding day to that dope ass guy. The months leading up to that most awesome day showed me that the extreme side came back quite easily as once again I took it to a scary place where I stopped getting my monthly, my hair started falling out again and I was flat out annoying to be around because of my obsession with food and working it off. I was incapable of enjoying any bit of life or festivities because I was so damn worried about what the scale said and the time slipping away leading to the big day. Oh hey fat and happy- you're back! Asshole. Wedded bliss, buying our first home and once again trying to relax and not be a bitch to be around comes back with 50lbs behind it. What is with this 50 pounds?!?!? This time it crept up slower. The week before Christmas last year we went to Costa Rica and had this epic tropical paradise of a time. I didn't worry about the food or my size, I just let go. And it was wonderful... when I wasn't in pain. My knees and joints had always given me hell for the last decade but coming back from this trip it was a bit more debilitating. So I hopped on the scale... my nemesis. 183. There it was. All 50 pounds right back on me. I decided that I'd had enough of this and it was time to do things a little differently this time. For the first time it wasn't totally about vanity- it was about my pain levels too. Pain no doctor or specialist or physical therapist could explain. I was going to fix myself damn it! Welcome to Weighting for Nachos! Nachos are my guilty pleasure. My absolute favorite. And this time- they would be a part of my plan. Once a week I'd have my damn nachos and beer and I'd be ok with it and it would be ok with me. I'd not be so damn serious/scary or obsessed or self-deprecating or annoying and for the love of nachos I'd give myself a fucking break! I'm down 22lbs since January 1st. I've struggled with not getting totally out of my mind again. It's a different kind of work. I've quit being so dependent on the scale or sizing... or at least I am trying. I'm trying balance. I'm trying to be more kind to myself. And I'm having nachos and beer once a week! Up until this week I was on a plateau for 3 whole months. I upped workouts, ate better on non nacho days and I just stayed the same. I could feel the backslide to crazy-town... the taxi taking me from healthy choices to being sick. So I decided to set short goals, document it all on Instagram and start this blog! I know I'm not the only one who feels this way. Who feels like no one could ever understand this and like they are all alone. The support from the Instagram community has been overwhelming and it's the kind of support I never knew I always needed. So join me. It's real, it's sometimes funny and sometimes not... and once a week it's smothered in queso, guac and pico.