regarawr

[regarawr]

i was pulling for ifa and ororon……

#stillnoifa #killme

[regarawr]

Part 2

(for part 1 click here)

Erwin had failed to realise just how touch-starved he actually was until this week.

Erwin Smith was a disciplined man.

He did not get involved with women, love, or any kind of sexual pleasure after he became Commander. He had greater goals to focus on. Distractions, like love and relationships, were privileges he couldn’t afford. It was never an issue for him—until this week.

The first time it happened was on Monday.

You see, Erwin was a man of habit.

Every Monday, he would head to the training grounds at six in the morning to spar with Levi. It was a way for him to stay in shape, and also a nice change from the mountain of paperwork waiting for him back at his desk.

But today, Levi was nowhere to be found. And do you know who was? You. That’s right. You were there.

“Captain said he was tired after his mission and didn’t want to see you first thing in the morning. His words, not mine,” you said, raising your hands in mock surrender.

Erwin sighed. Why hadn’t Levi told him about this arrangement beforehand? Well, it was either sparring with you or drowning in paperwork. The first option sounded far more appealing when he thought about the looming stack of papers.

He decided he’d go easy on you.

————

Erwin Smith was a confident man.

He knew you were good at fighting Titans—probably better than him—but he could take you down in hand-to-hand combat. After all, he was a big guy. Tall, well-built. You were tall, yes, and fit, but in hand-to-hand combat? You were no match for him.

So, why exactly was he pinned to the ground with you sitting on his lap, using your weight to keep him in place?

Maybe he had underestimated you a little.

“Told you I’d win,” you said, your arms folded across your chest as you flashed a victorious grin. You made no effort to get off him.

“I wasn’t expecting you to be that fast,” Erwin muttered, though he made no effort to get you off him.

“Now you do.”

You pressed your entire body weight on him. Erwin wasn’t sure whether you were teasing him or just making sure you kept him pinned.

What he was sure about though was that your ass, yes your ass, was on his crotch, yes his crotch.

and then he realises that is not a good thing.

“Are you planning to keep me pinned to the ground? I think it’s pretty obvious I’ve lost.”

“Oh, yeah. Got distracted, my bad.” With that, you get off him and offer him a hand to stand up, which he graciously accepts.

“…It’s alright. Uh, well… forgive me, but I just remembered something. I should head to my office.” Erwin starts speed-walking toward his office. He doesn’t wait for a response from you. He can’t. He shuts the door firmly behind him as he enters and looks down at his crotch.

“Get a grip, Smith.”

Erwin made a conscious effort to avoid you for the rest of the day.

———

The second time it had happened was Tuesday.

Erwin had asked for your assistance on a particular report.

So there you were.

Standing behind Erwin’s chair with your left hand on his shoulder and your right hand pointing at something in the report that, frankly, he couldn’t care less about.

He was so hyper-aware of your presence that it wasn’t even funny.

‘You smell nice.’

That’s all Erwin could think about.

���Commander? Are you listening?” You peeked over to check on him.

“…Yes. Sorry, I was just thinking about something. Continue.”

So you did. You went on with the report, and Erwin cleared his throat, trying to focus on the task at hand.

‘Get a fucking grip, Smith.’

———

The third time it happened was Wednesday.

You were in his office, working on the report he had asked for your assistance with the day before. Your hair was tied up today, and your long neck was right in his line of sight. He couldn’t look away.

This was a problem.

He was supposed to be working, not ogling some girl like a pubescent boy. He tried to shift his attention back to the task at hand, but then you got up from your seat, and Erwin had no idea why.

“Is something bothering you?” he asked, his voice betraying a hint of concern.

“Mhm, no. I’m just feeling a bit hot,” you said, removing your uniform jacket.

Erwin really should look away.

But he didn’t.

“Do you want me to open a window or something?”

“No.” You shrugged and returned to your seat.

Erwin tried not to look at your neck, your collarbones, and your-

Damn it.

Erwin had realized he really needed to do something about this situation

before it got any worse.

[regarawr]

An AU Where...

Instead of going into acting, Kyoko buys up Sho's favourite pudding cup company and makes sure they never sell to him again. How she gets the money for this is up to the writer.

[regarawr]

Part 1

(for part 2 click here)

“Come in,” Erwin said with a tired sigh.

Erwin Smith was an observant man. He knew who it was. It was you. He could tell by the rustle of your pants as you walked toward his office door, the slight pause you took before knocking, and your fast, impatient knock.

He also knew why you were here.

It started a month ago. Erwin had called you into his office to congratulate you on your promotion to squad leader. It was meant to be a quick exchange—he’d offer his congratulations, send you off, and go back to working on whatever file needed attention.

But you had different plans.

“Commander, can I ask you something?” you asked, hesitantly but not nervous.

“Hm?” he raised his head slightly. You didn’t ask questions often, and Erwin couldn’t help but wonder what was troubling you. He cleared his throat. You were his responsibility—after all, he was the one who had influenced you into joining the Scouts.

“I don’t mind. Go ahead.”

“…if you’re free tonight, would you like to have dinner with me? Just us.”

“…”

Erwin didn’t know how to respond. Was this a request for a date? Really? Why?

Then it hit him: this was his fault. He had recruited you out of the underground, where you had little exposure to other men except for Levi—and perhaps not in a romantic sense. And now, you were asking him out. Erwin sighed, feeling the weight of his responsibility. He was the one you’d spent the most time around. Naturally, your feelings might have developed in that direction, but that didn’t change the fact that he didn’t have time for such things.

“I’m honored, but I’m afraid I have to decline,” he said, placing his pen down and looking at you. “I’m a busy man, and I can’t indulge in such activities. Surely, you’ll find someone else… someone more your age.”

“You’re, what, twenty-two? Don’t act so old.”

“I am not twenty-two, and that’s not the point…”

“I’m not asking you to marry me. I just asked for dinner.”

“I have work…” Erwin’s voice softened, though he still kept his composure.

“Alright. I’ll go then.” You shrugged and left his office.

Erwin didn’t know what to make of the situation. He expected you to be disappointed, sad, angry—something. But you had simply shrugged and left, as though nothing happened.

Erwin sighed and went back to his work.

The next day, you were back in his office with another report. You handed it to him, and he reviewed it quietly. You sat on the other side, watching him with an unreadable expression.

“Good work. Your notes are very thorough. Keep it up.”

“Thank you, sir. Can I ask you something?”

“Sure. Is it about the report?”

“No. I wanted to ask if you’re free today… for dinner.”

“…”

“No, I’m afraid I’m busy.”

“Alright. I’ll take my leave then. Thank you, sir.” You left, just like before.

The routine continued. Every Friday, you’d ask him out for dinner, and every Friday, he would reject you. It became a pattern.

But then, one Friday, you didn’t ask him.

He wasn’t sure what to make of it. He assumed you’d simply given up. He told himself it was for the best.

———

The following weeks passed, and Erwin couldn’t help but notice the change in your behavior. You stopped asking him out for dinner altogether. Every Friday, you’d come into his office, submit your report, and leave without saying another word. The sudden silence confused him.

He had expected you to be disappointed or upset—maybe even angry—but you weren’t. You were calm as usual, as though nothing had changed. And Erwin was left to wonder what had happened, unsure of how to approach the situation.

But he didn’t have time to dwell on it. There was work to be done, and priorities to focus on. He convinced himself that this was for the best—after all, his job came first. You had been focusing on your work, too, and perhaps you had simply moved on. Maybe you’d realized that there was no future in pursuing him.

That was for the best, wasn’t it?

———

Then one day, things changed.

Erwin opened his eyes to find you close to his face, your worried expression framed by the dim light of the room. He blinked, disoriented. Where was he? What had happened?

“Are you alright?” you asked, your voice laced with concern. “I patched up your head. Does it hurt?”

Erwin slowly touched the back of his head and winced. His fingers came away wet. Blood. He sighed. He had a headache, but more pressing matters filled his mind.

“I’m fine,” he muttered. “Can you tell me where we are? How did we end up here?”

“We were on an expedition,” you explained, your voice calm but tense. “You almost got eaten by a Titan, but I grabbed you before that happened. We got separated from the group in the process... and my gas is low, so I carried you to this hut for shelter.”

Erwin’s eyes widened. “You should’ve used my gas,” he replied, his voice weak from the injury. “To escape. Regroup.”

“And leave you to die?” you asked, incredulous. “No. I’m not going to let that happen.”

Erwin looked at you, still dazed. “You’re my priority,” you said simply, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

“What do you mean?” he asked, still trying to process everything.

“You didn’t ask me out for dinner the past few weeks,” Erwin said, suddenly aware of the absurdity of his own words.

“Are you mad I didn’t?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No.”

“Disappointed?”

“No... just surprised.”

“Why is that surprising?”

“Well… you asked me out every Friday without fail for the last year or so. And then you just stopped. It’s… unexpected.”

“A year? Time flies by,” you said with a small chuckle, trying to brush off the tension.

“That’s not the answer to my question.”

“You didn’t ask me a question,” you replied, your tone slightly teasing.

Erwin sighed, frustration bubbling up. “You stopped asking me out for dinner,” he repeated.

“That’s a statement, not a question,” you said flatly.

He raised an eyebrow. “Oh, for God’s sake. I have a terrible headache from this injury. Can you just answer me?”

You paused, taking a deep breath. “I was trying to respect your decision,” you said softly. “You said you wanted to focus on your job. You didn’t have time for... matters like that. I was trying to respect that.”

Erwin blinked, stunned by your thoughtfulness. “I see... well, that’s… thoughtful of you. I appreciate—”

“I haven’t given up yet,” you interrupted.

Erwin’s eyes narrowed in confusion. “Given up on what exactly?”

“On you,” you said simply.

“...You should,” he replied with a sigh. “I assure you, nothing fruitful can come of it. It’s better if you focus on someone else. Someone who will actually... reciprocate your feelings.”

You didn’t respond to his words. Instead, you checked the back of his head again, making sure the bleeding had stopped.

“Are you feeling better?” you asked, a quiet concern in your voice. “Not dizzy, right?”

“I’m better,” Erwin said, though the slight dizziness still lingered. “Slightly dizzy, but not enough to faint.”

“Good. I’m calling my horse. We should try to find the others.”

You helped him onto your horse, and Erwin’s arms instinctively wrapped around your waist as you rode towards the gates. The dizziness in his head wasn’t the only thing he couldn’t quite understand.

Erwin didn’t say anything in response. He couldn’t quite put into words the strange, fuzzy feeling in his stomach—not from the injury, but from the proximity between you two. He tried to shake it off.

He held onto you, unsure of what was going on inside him, but knowing that he couldn’t get rid of this strange feeling.