right-path-to-follow

[right-path-to-follow]

How To Be A Better Person Pt. 2 Being Honest With Yourself

This is the most important step in becoming the best version of yourself; a good person. You might ask, "If this is the most important step, why isn't it first?" That's because you needed to test yourself. You needed to see that you are willing to self-reflect and be honest with yourself with an outsider's guidance before you'd be willing to hear from an outsider that you're not being honest with yourself.

You might ask, "If I'm completely honest, it's going to be with myself, right?" Wrong. You will be the first person to convince yourself that you are doing the right thing, that you're "actually being nice", or that you're "just being brutally honest". You don't want to believe that you're not a good person, or that your actions could be portrayed as bad. You will be the first person to be dishonest with yourself.

It's no secret that feeling bad isn't a good feeling. Everyone makes justifications for certain actions and behaviors. It's perfectly normal that you do as well, as long as you try to be more aware of what you say and do to others and actively try to do things in a more pleasing manor.

For example, there is never a reason to be "brutally honest". A good person has no need for brutality. If you intention is ever to be "brutally honest", then you don't have good intentions.

Say a family memeber's own actions have contributed to them being in a long-term depression. It would be horribly unkind of you to tell that family member, "You're a lazy slob who aspires for more than you're willing to put the effort into achieving." Instead, try saying in a positive, uplifting tone: "Hey, Uncle Josh, did you know the local tattoo shop has a booth open? I talked to the owner, he doesn't know you, so you're good to talk to him. I'm sure you'd feel really good having some of your own money, instead of having my mom always telling you 'no' when you ask her for $15 dollars and having her accuse you of only asking because you want liquor." Phrase it in a way that makes people WANT to hear what you have to say, and you're on the right way to being a better version of yourself; a good person.

If you ever find yourself telling someone to "lower their standards", you're not actually doing them a favor, therefore you're not "actually being nice", and you need to be honest with yourself about that.

Lastly, you're lying to yourself with you go out of your way to make justifications for objectively bad actions. For example, if you're in a stated monogamous romantic relationship with one person, and you choose to invest in a different, unofficiated romantic relationship, you might tell yourself that the right thing to do is to leave your current partner so you won't continue to hurt them in one way or another. This is actually very, very selfish. Should you make the decision to leave your partner for someone else, the pretense of doing it so that you won't "continue to lead them on" or so that way "they can find someone who will truly love them", that pretense is lost when your (ex) partner has to completely change their lifestyle, schedule, finances, all while doing so alone and grieving. In this circumstance, you've done nothing but lie to yourself so you could be more comfortable making your selfish decision. The right thing to do is simply not build any sort of relationship that could lead to romance while already in a romantic relationship. If you honest with yourself, and you feel as though it's not something control, please know you don't need friendships with people who fall into any of your romantic preferences.

If you try being honest with yourself about your intentions and feelings every time you enter a new situation or are presented with a new situation, then you will be on your way to being a better version of yourself; a good person.

[right-path-to-follow]

How To Be A Better Person Pt. 1 Being Self-Centered

First, you need to accept that you're NOT a good person. You're NOT a good person. No matter how much self-reflection you've done, how hard you've worked on yourself, how many steps you've put in place to actively be better, you're not there. Not yet, at least.

If you constantly tell yourself that you're already a good person, or that what you're working on is the only aspect of yourself that you need to work on, then you're not allowing yourself to truly grow as a person. Telling yourself that you've already met the goal keeps you from seeing where it's really at. You're actively stunting yourself when you claim to be a good person.

Instead of telling yourself that you are a good person, try telling yourself something along the lines of, "I am working every day to be a better person." There is power in the words you tell yourself, so don't use words of finality when thinking about self-growth.

Now that you're on your way to accepting that you're not a good person YET, but merely on your way to being one, you'll be more willing to look at some unappealing traits that you, and everyone else might hold.

The first trait that hinders becoming a better person is self-centeredness. Please, don't mistake this for selfishness, which is a much harsher word often associated with horrible acts of betrayal or harmful greed. Being self-centered is merely being preoccupied with oneself. An example of self-centeredness would be of a woman standing in line at Starbucks for twenty minutes, playing on her phone while she waits. Once she finally gets to the counter, she puts away her phone, and proceeds to take 8 minutes to decide what she wants before making an order. While this isn't inherently bad behavior, and most people wouldn't give the interaction a second thought - this is actually very inconsiderate behavior that might be keeping someone from being the best version of themselves.

If you take five minutes to wait in line at a coffee shop, that's more than enough time to have narrowed down the options of what you might want off the menu. If you're on your phone in line, not only are you wasting your own valuable time by not mentally preparing your order before arriving at the register, you're hindering those who are trying to meet required times at their job. You're hindering those in line who are trying to hurry and have consideration for the people behind them. You're also doing an injustice to those before you, who were prepped so you could make it to the register in a timely manner.

Once you're at the counter, if you're still unsure of what you want, you should politely let those behind you know that you're sorry, and it might take a moment. Most people will be grateful for the heads up.

If you take those tiny steps, or have a similar mindset when approaching any similar action this way, you're on your way to being a much better, less self-centered person.

Another thing to avoid when trying to be a less self-centered person is being late to your self-appointed schedules. Self-appointed schedules are when you tell a relative or friend, "I'll be there at 6 P.M.". Not adhering to your self-appointed schedule would be showing up at 7:13 P.M. because you had to stop and get gas, cash a check at the bank, go through the Starbucks drive- thru, 'quickly' exchange a pair of pants at Target, and stop by an old man's house to get money, even though you claim he isn't your sugar daddy. If you know you have to run these errands before you make it to your destination, you need to be realistic with how long it will take you to arrive, and communicate that honestly.

While not being completely accurate with your time framing might not seem like improper behavior, (either because you have nothing to do after arriving to your destination, or the destination isn't a big deal to you), YOU are not the only person reliant on you being in a timely manner. Your family or friends may have plans after meeting with you, they might have chores or work that needed to be done, and could have been done if you had arrived on time.

When making plans with someone, please practice not being self-centered by reminding yourself that other people have their own schedules that they might need to adhere to. Not adhering to those schedules could cause them immense distress, and you wouldn't want their distress on your conscious, over something you see as 'not a big deal'.

The last example may be controversial to some, but is true none the less. Helping others who have not asked for help is, more often than not, a self-centered action. It's no secret that helping others can make you feel good. It's not so commonly known that the dopamine's released from helping others, filling you with a sense of pride, accomplishment, and 'better'ness, can become addicting. Without ever stopping to question how helping others might be a self-serving action (because, how could helping others be self serving?), you end up inserting yourself into situations that didn't call for your 'help'. Giving un-asked for help could leave the recipient feeling ashamed and embarrassed, for they knew they could handle the situation on their own. It might also leave the recipient hesitant to ask for help when they truly need it. In the end, the right path to being a better person in this situation would be to wait until someone directly asks for help, and then take action.

If you apply these teachings to every aspect of your life, then you will be on the right path to being a better person. It may seem hard to view these and similar actions as inherently negative, but they are. It's best to be mindful of your actions at all times, and assess from an unbiased standpoint if what you're actively doing is satisfactory to just you, or if everyone around you can benefit from choices you make. And THAT'S how you start to be a better person.

[right-path-to-follow]

About the Founder

My name is Savvy. I am the founder of "The Right Path to Follow". It's a very small organization that's focus is on teaching other's the correct steps to take to become the best version of themselves; A good person.

Being a good person isn't about reaching a goal, it's a learning journey for those who are eager to do and be better.

As the founder, it is my responsibility to make sure these teachings are heard by those willing to learn. It is my responsibility to take the enlightened information that I have and share it with YOU, if you are willing to learn. Please don't be put off by me using the term "enlightened information". I don't claim to be a truly enlightened person, only a person who has received the adequate knowledge necessary to help as all grow.

Just as I am the sole person teaching these valuable life lessons, I am the sole runner of this account. I will be posting lessons on "How To Be A Better Person" regularly. I will share personal stories where I learned these life lessons on Wednesdays. I will share my nuanced, personal views (as well as teach others to have more nuanced views, therefore making them a better person), on Sundays. Feel free to ask me any questions, and I will elaborate to the best of my abilities.

[right-path-to-follow]

Hello unofficial members of the Right Path To Follow. I am Savvy, the founder of this 'organization'.

For years, I have been working on becoming a Good Person™. While I have yet to achieve truly being a Good Person™, I believe I'm truly on the right path to becoming a Good Person™, and can share what I've learned with others, in the hopes of making the world a place full of Good Person™s.

Join me, who is close to finishing my personal journey, while you start at the beginning of your personal journey, in becoming better versions of ourselves. While you don't HAVE to follow my lead, there is nothing holding you to the expectation of following my lead, and there is no punishment for not following my lead, you should follow my lead and see for yourself how The Right Path To Follow is truly the right path to follow.