rmtomboy17

[rmtomboy17]

Ultimatum

I think that I may have been given a thinly veiled ultimatum on Tuesday. “And I’m less interested in being 1 of 2 girlfriends. My stance on that has been unchanging.” I know that I told her in May that was what I was looking for, and it seemed really difficult. Until now. I know that my GF is most comfortable with my having a Friends with Benefits (FWB) or Sexual Friendship. However, that is…

[rmtomboy17]

Tesoro

I have a new love interest. We had been DM’ing on the app since mid-July, I think. I don’t know in reality because she deleted the app. I have this weird, shallow thing. I don’t look at women with brown eyes. I’ve been that way my whole life too. My very first GF (hs) had brown eyes. The little liar did too. Otherwise, my GFs have had green or blue eyes. I had her on possible matches and when…

[rmtomboy17]

TikTok

I woke up on Tuesday morning having slept really well to a TikTok by James Sexton regarding lesbian divorces characterized by knock down drag out fighting and prior Domestic Violence experiences. My initial reaction was “WTF?” Then I realized that my GF had sent it for a reason, so I obtained a white paper and found out that due to intersectionality–being female and having less financial power…

[rmtomboy17]

Limit

I’m Solo Poly. There have been many times that we have discussed in groups that I belong to a rule, a limit and a boundary. People confuse them. Rules are societal standards. You can’t yell “Fire” at the movies. Rules in relationships are things like, “I cooked,” so you’ll clean the kitchen and start the dishwasher. They don’t typically apply to things that can’t be easily understood. Rules are…

[rmtomboy17]

Magic

Dating apps are mostly torture. You have people that you see IRL and realize after three dates that they’re not likely friendship material. The last woman that I had three dates with doesn’t stop talking. Not for a second. You have to interrupt her with simple attending behaviors. I had a date with a woman who was love bombing to a giant degree and her car smelled of strong marijuana. Then, I…

[rmtomboy17]

PRP

My GF has these super long range baby monitors. Last Monday she connected with the accountant on the main floor of her building–she has the only apartment in the building–and gave him the baby monitor, so if there was an emergency, he could get her daughter out of their apartment. We went to the orthopedic surgeon in my car early Monday morning. I didn’t ask her to come with me. I was grateful…

[rmtomboy17]

Love Language

I’m not sure when these became all the rage… Maybe in the 2010s decade? My ex-wife and I agreed that gifts are mostly dumb. I’ve been thinking about this topic a lot lately as I’m rounding the corner on 11-months with my girlfriend too. Also, they’re on the middle portion of most women’s dating profiles. Hands down, I am a Physical Touch person. I think that it’s how I receive all input. As a…

[rmtomboy17]

Dating

I have been out on three dates since I have been on the app. I had plans for five, and two were not happening. One because the girl was a tease and maybe side hustling for money and the other because I wasn’t positive if I’d be back in town on time and also got a flat tire. She asked someone else. Dating kind of sucks. I am having my fourth date today. And it’s with a woman whom I’ve gone out…

[rmtomboy17]

Date

My current GF has a three-year-old. That means that this child is really her whole world. I hope that because she puts every ounce of herself into her child that will yield a securely attached person who can fit into the world. That’s also meant that I make plans for all of our dates. I’d like that to shift completely. We went to an interesting talk on July 9th and out to dinner. I had fun. My…

[rmtomboy17]

Psilocybin

I’ve been dosing psilocybin for 7-months. You can have the drug and use it in 7 states. It’s been being studied actively by the Food and Drug Administration since 2023. I think that ever since the documentary about mushrooms became wildly popular, folks have been given pause regarding using it to change their brains. I’ve been taking non-psychoactive mushrooms since 2012. I was recommended a TED…

[rmtomboy17]

Neighbors

I was walking home after a concert with the author last night and she asked me how my girlfriend and I are doing. I told her that we are doing well for the most part and that sometimes she gets emotional, which is unique for her, as she’s not particularly emotionally triggered by anything. She is a crier, and often has tears in her eyes, but is never angry and rarely irritated. We haven’t had a…

[rmtomboy17]

Car

I had a really scary Chevette in 1991. My Dad was generally an intense and angry person and he didn’t want to work per se, but did. When he bought a newer car (new to him, as it was used) he gave me his Chevette, which he used previously for commuting to work and errands. There were holes in the floorboards which would shoot geysers up when torrential rain would gather on the streets. He hated…

[rmtomboy17]

Women

I had a nice date with Mountain Girl and the turn off was marijuana. I totally get that it’s legal, but it grosses me out. It’s too adjacent to smoking cigarettes. She also lives really far away and I don’t want to hustle. I got in her Volvo two Saturdays ago and it smelled like pot smoke. We had fun, and she clearly likes me. I just don’t think that this is the situation that I’m pursuing. I…

[rmtomboy17]

HER

After getting banned from Tinder, I made a HER account and almost had difficulty managing it for awhile. Now, it’s simple. If you’re not verified, I don’t message you. If you’re between 25-39 I assume that you only want sex or a sugar mama. Pretty straightforward. Enter the mountain girl. But, first let me tell you what I had learned and utilized. I had a rhythm. If you were real, I either…

[rmtomboy17]

Fifth

My flight took off an hour and a half late, so I wasn’t settled into my hotel until almost 4 in the morning in downtown Chicago. I also forgot to hang the Do Not Disturb tag so I didn’t get to sleep until noon. I was granted a 1:00 pm check out although the Blues Festival was taking place; however, I had the scary banging knock from housekeeping at 9:30. 😦 After hitting Billy’s Bagels, I went to…

[rmtomboy17]

Drawing Board

I thought that we had a nice date. I hope that she’s not having buyer’s remorse. I’ve barely heard from her. If she cancels next Thursday, I guess that I can ask her before the music night that my best friend is hosting, or even when she confirms or cancels Thursday, if she wants to still hang out. She’s entangled with a guy who sounds like he has Avoidant Attachment. I tried very hard to get her…

[rmtomboy17]

Drawing Board

I had a good first date. She’s really funny, fiercely open and genuine. Has great big hazel eyes, a nice mouth, is quick with a smile and joke, and we talked so easily. She and I spent two-hours together at dinner. We also laughed a lot. I told her that I had butterflies getting ready and off and on all day and that they melted away after a few minutes of her getting there. She said that she gets…