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haha thats so funny [face gets gravely serious] but were you not a staunch and trusted ally i would have you executed for such a joke

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drives me fucking crazy how i keep getting recommended weight loss content… like sorry i looked up one video on correct gym form ONCE

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sometimes the tragedy of distance is very simple. i want to get groceries with you

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"all you need is love" wrong. scallions as well

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me: i fucking hate medical school so fucking much i hate it here i'm going to start chewing on granite that's how much i hate it

me, on the same day: you know what, i actually love medicine, i've never felt as fulfilled as i do here and i love it so much and life is good

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diamond dust

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scanned page from my journal

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HummingbirdPerching.png

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comfy bed. take me home. to the place. where i belong. pillow blanky. sleeping soundly. take me home. comfy bed

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at least sisyphus only had one never-ending task. i have like 50 and all of them cost money

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top three activities

- crying over spilt milk

- rubbing salt in the wound

- making a mountain out of a molehill

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hey seo! i saw someone sent you an ask like this and i just wanted to reiterate how much i loved your old content when it was up; your creativity and personality and fellow stationery nerdiness was so wonderful to be a part of, even if only from a distance. that being said, i have SO much respect for you for re-evaluating what’s best for you even if it’s difficult/a departure from what people expect of you. thank you for the community you created and i hope things start looking up for you 💙

i'm gonna cry 😭😭 this is so so so kind and i really, truly appreciate it so much

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hi seo, you could start thinking about your videos as your school memories that were fun and joyful and think about how many people you have helped instead of feeling bad about them that you have to carry around to yourself your just gonna give yourself stress and sadness, but dont delete them whatsoever and just keep them private to yourself bc its like for the nostalgic purposes for you like maybe you become really old and you can look at younger vids of yourself, hope your feeling better! :)

this was actually quite kind 🥺🥺 thank you so much

i hope that in the future, i can create more of a positive impact with my words and actions than i have in the past :")

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big mood on the showing empathy being graded during med school... i forget that most of my peers are basically loaded or nepo babies of some form until i'm violently reminded via the cars they drive or how they talk about their holiday plans. i had someone ask, "why doesn't the patient simply stop working? don't they care about their health?" who is paying for the patient's food, rent, and medications!!!! not the government!!!!

literally!!!! like sorry girl not everyone can live in their parents' vacation house instead of renting an apartment or having roommates or being (gasp) unhoused!!!!!

i get it, the empathy modules suck and feel absolutely soulless. however, i see some people in action and i go "oh i get why we need these now"

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seo did you delete your videos???

i privated most of them and only deleted 2 because i realized i had my driver's license fully visible in some of the clips lol... i've kept the ones that i felt like were still helpful up like the no buy content and the book recommendations, but otherwise, the rest are in my personal archives.

don't get me wrong; i loved making content and i genuinely miss the little community we had built together. however, i did not feel like i was making a positive impact anymore. i had middle school students asking me how to study for 8 hours straight, young girls telling me that they tore up their bullet journals because they couldn't make theirs as straight and neat as mine, and high school + college students telling me that they spent the last of their paycheck on mildliners. i felt so awful over the level of overconsumption and unhealthy study culture i had contributed to, whether it was inadvertent or not. i also felt guilty over the sponsorships and ad revenue i had accepted in the past, and so the few videos that are up have ad revenue turned off and i am no longer a youtube partner.

i might return to making a few posts here and there on instagram or maybe even tiktok because i know a lot of people had a lot of questions about my experiences in medical school. however, i think i am closing the chapter on my youtube era.

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[on the verge of defeat and delirious with lust] i could be a wound in your heart that will never heal

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you're not turning your fandom hobby into a job are you? giving yourself deadlines and quotas that you have to meet? focusing on the numbers instead of your enjoyment of the act of creation?