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[rubyeyeproductions]

10 Facts About My Demonic Possession You Wouldn’t Believe

1 - I didn’t anger an ancient deity or use a ouija board

In the movies people often get possessed because they awaken an angry spirit or summon an angry spirit with a ouija, really they just make a spirit mad and they end up possessed. I didn’t do any of that. I woke up one day and ended up getting possessed. You can just be walking around and a demon can think that one looks good and bam, you’re possessed.

Think of it like a sneeze, yeah there’s probably a reason if you boil it down, but sometimes you just sneeze.

2 - I knew right away I wasn’t alone

I was walking home from work when I felt a jolt, almost like something pushed me. Right after that I felt like someone was with me. I thought maybe I was being watched, but I looked around and no one was there. I was alone on the street, well, I guess not alone anymore.

Then he spoke. His voice was in my head. It wasn’t like hearing my thoughts, it had a different voice, a different cadence, different tone. It was just different. The first thing he said to me was, “Hey there, bud, how are you?” He was greeting me. Which brings me to my next point:

3 - Demons are pretty chill dudes

Okay, I can’t speak for all demons, but my demon was pretty cool.

His name was Hekshore, he’s several hundreds of years old (he never told me a real number, but he did clarify that he was young by most demon standards), and he didn’t, like, want to kill anybody or hurt me. Dude just wanted to hang out with me. Live my life with me.

After the initial reaction of, “HOLY FUCK THERE’S A DEMON INSIDE ME,” I kinda just rolled with it. Like, not many people get to have a demon party with them, you know. Dude was fun too.

The second day Hekshore was with me I was supposed to go to a party at my friend’s house. I was nervous about going, being possessed and all, but Hekshore reassured me he’d take care of me, so we went. I had a few drinks, did a few hits, and it still affected me, but Hekshore remained level headed the entire time. So I was partying and this guy was just making sure I wasn’t hurting myself, I got water before going to sleep, he got me home and in bed. It was like having a backup responsible adult inside me to make sure I was taken care of.

Hekshore was the man. He not only took care of me that night, but he also allowed me to see my friends in a whole new light.

4 - I could see people’s darkest sides

There’s kind of like a demon vision that comes with being possessed. Everything looks different, almost better, like a movie. The colors have more of a pop, everything looks cleaner and crisper, and, most importantly, people are more exposed.

Now I don’t mean that I got like x-ray vision and can see through people’s underwear or whatnot, but I mean I can see what a person has on the inside. I can see their fears, insecurities, secrets, just about any personal and private thing about them. To me everyone was an open book.

I was a little bit late for work one day and my boss was mad at me, she was screaming and shit, yada yada yada. However when I looked at her while she was screaming I could see that she was cheating on her husband with my coworker. Like the words weren’t written on her face or anything, but I could see it on her.

So while she was screaming I started smiling and when she asked me what’s so funny I said, “Do you think David would like to know about you and Chuck?”

Her eyes went wide and when she spoke it was soft, “What are you talking about?”

I didn’t answer her. “Sherile, didn’t you just turn 43? Chuck is 19. You could be his mother. You are a mother! Your daughter is only 5 years younger than Chuck. And, before you ask, no Chuck didn’t say anything to me about you too. But I can promise you that no one else will find out, as long as you let me get back to doing my fucking job and stop yelling at me everytime I fuck up. Okay?”

She nodded, we had an understanding.

There’s a joy that comes with knowing people’s darkness. It gives you power over them. It’s intoxicating. It gives confidence, and people see it.

5 - People notice that you’re different

After about a week of Hekshore being with me people started to say something. It starts with little things like, “You look different today,” “Your eyes look very bright and clear,” “You’re just glowing.” But these start to turn from small things to, “There’s something about you that isn’t the same,” “You seem like a different person,” “You aren’t like how you used to be.”

Yeah, no shit I was different, I was better! I was no longer shy or pitied myself. I felt fucking great! Like all the time! Hekshore was always there to watch out for me, take care of me, and best of all, he was always telling me how good I was.

I only visit my mom and dad when I have a bunch of wash to do or for family events. I was running out of clean clothes so I brought my laundry by and my mom was looking me up and down said, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, mom, I feel great. Why?” I could see worry in her, some fear too.

“You just seem different.”

I smiled, “Oh, really? How?”

“You don’t seem like the same little boy I raised anymore.”

“Well, duh, mom. I grew up.”

“No, it’s not that. I mean, yes, you grew up, but I could still always see my little baby when I looked at your face. I still saw the little boy I held in my arms every night. But now I look at your face and... You seem different, moonpie. I’m worried about you.”

I grit my teeth and shake my head, “I hate it when you call me moonpie.”

My mom hung her head and walked away from me, leaving me to do my wash in peace.

When I was leaving my dad pulled me aside and asked if I’ve been doing anything that he should know about. The implication there is drugs and when I replied with no, he said “You need to be taking care of yourself. We worry about you. Your mom especially.”

I could hear Hekshore laughing in my head. I was better off now than I ever was before and he and I both knew it.

My roommates were also getting worried about me (just like everybody else was for whatever reason) so they started spying on me. They got footage of me talking to myself and using the name Hekshore, me laughing at things Hekshore would say, but of course on film it seems like I’m laughing at nothing. You don’t quite get the full experience on film. The only way to do that is to live it. So they compiled this video of me “being weird” and showed it to me to try and “get me to understand how strange I’ve been acting,” or whatever.

I watched the whole thing to appease them and then said their video was cute. As I tried to walk away one of them said they were trying to help. At this point Hekshore was getting annoyed with everyone bad mouthing him. He had to sit and watch the same video that I did, but to him it’s like everyone is saying he’s a bad guy, and he’s not, but I’m not going to start telling people the voice in my head is a cool guy if you get to know him, because that’d only make me sound crazy. He was tired and angry of all the accusations so he did something that I honestly didn’t know he could do, he took over for a moment.

I don’t know what he said or did, but when I got control back my roommates were leaning away from me with the most terrified looks on their faces. I felt a slight ping of guilt, but it went away quickly.

That’s when my roommates decided to get me an exorcism.

6 - Exorcisms hurt

Okay, this one you probably can believe. But for real, exorcisms hurt like a mother fucker!

I woke up one day and heard commotion outside my room, when I walked out, there was about 10 people in the room. My roommates, my parents, my little sister, a few friends, and a guy dressed like a priest from some b-rate horror movie.

They performed an exorcism on me. They threw holy water at me, held up a crucifix to me, and chanted things in latin. I don’t remember all of it, but I remember how it felt.

I was being torn apart. They were tearing Hekshore away from me. By this point he’s been with me for almost 4 months, and they were the best 4 months of my whole life. He became a part of me I always wanted and relied on and they were tearing him away from me. It was like losing a limb.

My skin boiled, I felt my brain crack, my bones felt like they were twisting inside of me. By body was being contorted and misshapen by the pain being brought onto me. Hekshore held me, but the tighter he held the worse the pain got. The closer he was the deeper the pain became.

It took several hours, but by the time it was done I had soars, burns, welts, and bruises covering most of my body. I couldn’t move for a few days. It felt like I had to relearn how to us my body. It was new and foreign and not at all what I wanted.

7 - When the demon leaves I don’t feel whole anymore

Hekshore became a part of me and when they took him away they took that part of me. It was a lobotomy of my soul.

You ever feel that empty feeling when you lose a loved one or a relationship ends? Like you’re not sure things will be the same because something isn’t there? That’s it.

When Hekshore left he left with parts of me that were there before he showed up. Things didn’t bring me joy. I just wanted to crawl into a hole and never leave. I was in mourning I guess, but I wasn’t just mourning Hekshore, but I was mourning the me that he helped me be. Now I am just a husk of the man I used to be.

8 - Normal doesn’t feel normal anymore

So I mentioned that when I was possessed everything looked different, looked better. Well, now that Hekshore is gone everything looks bleak and gray. Colors don’t feel colorful. The sounds of the day are muted or lose their vibrance. Music isn’t alive anymore, but just empty sounds overlaying themselves.

I used to be fun. I used to be the person who could keep the party going when everyone was getting tired. I had bundles of energy and happiness to bring to people, but now that was all taken away and I don’t feel anything.

Now everything feels soft and empty. Like cotton balls. I’m living in a world of cotton balls.

A couple friends took me to see a movie and everything on the screen looked like how it used to be. The colors were bright, the sounds glorious. I was living in a movie before and it was amazing. When the credits came I looked around and saw the blandness of the world around me again and hated it all.

One of my roommates was talking to me about how her boyfriend and her were having trouble, but I just didn’t care. She started to get mad at me since it was clear I wasn’t listening and said, “What’s wrong with you? Lately you’ve been so fucking emo and depressed. This isn’t you, dude. You weren’t like this before.”

“You took something away from me and you ask me what’s wrong?”

“We were trying to help you.”

“You broke me into pieces and tooks parts of me away.”

“Dude, you were possessed! We took away a demon. It was not your friend. It’s a fucking demon.”

“His name’s Hekshore.”

“Who fucking cares what his name was. He was a demon for christ’s sake!” She couldn’t understand it. “Look, I’m sorry we took your ‘buddy’ or whatever, but we were trying to help you.”

“You and your boyfriend are having problems, right?”

“Yeah, it’s not looking good for us.”

“When he leaves you you’ll know how I feel.”

She didn’t talk to me after that.

9 - It’s impossible to take away the empty feeling

I’m sleeping more. All it feels like I’m doing is working and sleeping. 6 weeks have passed since Hekshore was torn away from me and the hole inside me only feels to be getting bigger. I tried to fill it with booze or weed, but they never fill me up. They pass right through me, going through the hole without stopping.

About a year ago, before Hekshore ever came into my life, I broke my foot jumping down some stairs and was given pain killers. I still had about half a bottle left that I never took. I started taking those to see if they’d fill the hole, but they were just making it bigger.

The numbness I was feeling only gets amplified. The hollow cavern inside of me stretches. I kind of prefered that instead of it staying the same. If I took enough then maybe the hole can just swallow me all together and end all of it. So that’s what I did.

I took a bunch one night and ended up passing out and waking up in an ER. My friends found me and thought I was trying to overdose and kill myself. Honestly, looking back, that’s probably what I was trying to do, but I never thought about it in those terms.

10 - I want Hekshore back

I’ve been looking up Hekshore. I can’t find much online, but there was a book at my library that my roommates checked out when they heard me seemingly saying Hekshore’s name to myself.

Hekshore was, at least according this book, the demon of ego. It says;

“Hekshore bloats the ego of his vessel, using their inflated right of self importance to make them feel more righteous and proud. The longer Hekshore inhabits the vessel the more the vessel’s positive feelings will be associate with their importance of self. It is best to remove Hekshore from the vessel early or the vessel will experience extreme episodes of mania and possibly take more risks that could result in great pain or loss.”

So Hekshore made me happy. And the people that “care about me” wanted to take that all away from me. They didn’t care about my happiness. They wanted me to feel bad. They wanted me to feel like shit like I do now. Hekshore cared about me and wanted me to feel good.

I’ve been doing more and more research into Hekshore. In what I’ve found he tries to find people who are already high spirited and positive and he just helps them maintain that feeling. So to lure him back I have to be positive. And I am.

I am positive I will get Hekshore back. I am positive that I can find him and bring him back to me. I will be happy because I will do all I can to find Hekshore and bring him back home. He is meant for me, I fucking know it.

I am making this post to see if anyone knows anything about how to conjure up Hekshore or where to find him. I’ve been doing lots of research, but nothing I find tells me where I can find him They all keep saying how it’s not a good idea or whatever, but I know they only say that because they were not his “vessel”. They didn’t feel the connection I did. They didn’t feel the utter euphoric bliss he brings to my life.

So please, if you have any information on how to find him, how to help, let me know. And if you know anyone that might than send them this post and help me bring Hekshore home.

[rubyeyeproductions]

Family Dinner

I put the plates on the table and said, “Eat up.” I tried to sound happy, but I knew what would happen, cause it happens every night. Nobody moved.

“Dinner’s ready. Dig in.” Nothing. They didn’t even move their arms from the arm rests.

“So we’re doing this again?” Nothing. “Goddammit, won’t somebody eat with me?” The three of them sat there. They didn’t look at me. My wife’s focus was in her lap, ignoring the food I put so much time and effort into.

“Please?” I begged and they still wouldn’t budge.

“That’s it. I’ve had it with you all! I work so hard to make a great meal for all of you and none of you eat it. Most nights I have to toss it all away, wasting so much. I’m not only wasting the food, but I am wasting my time and energy. I work hard for all of you. I try to make something that I know all of you will enjoy. I take all your needs into account and you three don’t even look at it.”

Still no reaction.

I held the big bowl of mashed potatoes right in front of my son’s face. “I made the mashed potatoes the way you like. Bacon and extra cheese. See?” but he doesn’t move. He kept his head back and stared at the ceiling. “Son, please? One bite?” He never looked at them.

That’s when Vivian, my daughter, tried to say something, but I couldn’t quite hear her, so I reached over and took the gag out of her mouth so I could understand her, “What’s that, angel?”

“Daddy, please stop! Please let me go!” She was screaming.

“Shhh. Angel, there’s no need to scream. Now what is it you want?”

“Let me go. Please. Just... just let me go.” She had tears coming out of her eyes. Since her arms were tied to the chair, I wiped the tears away for her. She flinched away from me as she did. I’ve never been so hurt.

“Honey, you don’t have to be scared of me.” She tried to pull away from me, so I held her tighter. I need her to know how much I love her. “Vivian, my beautiful angel, I’m sorry I scare you, but I’m here to help you, not harm you. Why do you think I take so long making dinner? It’s because I care. I want it to be perfect!”

Vivian stared at me, then at the food, then back at me. “It’s all rotten.”

“Huh?” I looked at the food. Green bean casserole, garlic bread, loaded mashed potatoes, and the centerpiece; honey smoked ham. It all looked so fresh and smelled delicious. Maybe Vivian was in the mood for something else? “What is it you want, my angel? What can I make for you that you’ll eat? Hmm?”

She didn’t say anything. She took deep breaths. Panicked breaths.

I let her go. “Fine. Okay, fine. If you’re gonna be like your mother and brother and not eat, than fine! But I want to thank you for at least talking to me, angel.” I put my hand on hers. She tried to pull away, but the ropes only tightened on her wrists. I tried not to be offended and I went back to making my point. “Thank you, Vivian, for talking to me. I mean, I’d prefer it if you ate the food I was making, but I’ll take the conversation. Does anybody else want to join our talk? Hmm? Anyone?”

I looked back and forth from my wife to my son. My wife looked down, at least I think so. I can never tell where she’s looking now that her eye sockets are empty holes. Her skull gathered dust. She doesn’t care about her appearance anymore.

I looked towards my son. His head is flailed back from his broken neck, the color in his skin starting to fade. Flies constantly buzz around him, but they never land. They just buzz.

Both of their clothes have holes from where the moths ate, my wife’s more so. I laugh a little through my nose, at least someone’s eating, right? Well, the rats too. I felt them crawl over my feet as I stood at the table. I used to try and keep them out, but now, I’m just happy someone’s enjoying my food.

When I looked at the food my stomach growled. I pull my chair up to the table, grab my fork, and get ready to dig into the ham. I couldn’t remember adding rice to the ham, but I must’ve, cause it was there. In the light it almost looked like it was moving. I need to fix that light. It flickers a lot.

I used the edge of my fork to cut into the ham. I was ready to put some push into it, but the ham was soft, almost too soft. They say meat should fall off the bone, not disintegrate. Maybe I didn’t cook it right. Didn’t matter. I took a bite out of the ham-- oh the ham! It was absolutely to die for!

There was a gagging noise to my right and I looked up just in time to see Vivian throw up. “Vivian, are you okay? Everything alright?” When she didn’t respond I assumed she was fine so I took another bite out of the ham. She gagged again.

“Vivian, what’s wrong with you? You feeling okay?”

Maybe you should make her eat.

I looked across the table at my wife. It was the first thing she said all night, but it made sense. Vivian needed some food in her system to fix her up. And what could be any better than the ham?

“Vivian, my beautiful angel, do you want some?” I held the fork out in front of her face. I could see the dancing rice on the edge of it.

“Da--daddy, no! Pl--please, no! Sto--p!” She tried to speak through her gags. She was saying no, but I knew what was best for her.

My, my. This is worse than I thought, dear.

Yes, father. Much worse.

Why don’t you try feeding her, my love?

Yes, father. Feed her. Feed my sister.

“Oh, son, you’re right! I’m sorry, my angel, I forgot your hands were tied down. Let me feed you.”

“Please, no. Daddy, no! No, no no! NO!” Vivian, my angel, started to squirm in her chair. She started to turn slightly pale.

I tried to stop her fighting. I just want to feed my angel. I want to feed my family. “Angel, angel, it’s okay,” I tried to sound soothing but it’s hard over her screams. “You’ll feel better with a little food in you.”

There was a choir of agreement from the rest of the table.

Yes. Feed her, my love. Let her taste how wonderful your dinner truly is!

Yes, father, feed her. It smells so good, it probably tastes better!

Even the rats joined in. Their squeals rang out in a chorus of Feed her! Feed her! over and over again as my wife and son kept on with their chants.

Vivian was shaking her head violently. I was scared I would stab her if I tried to feed her.

Hold her down!

I listened to my wife and wrapped one arm around her head. I pried her mouth open with my hand. It was difficult, but I managed to get the food in her mouth. She tried to spit it out, but I held her mouth shut until she ate it.

“Well? How was it?”

“Daddy, please! Please don’t make me eat that!” She gagged as she spoke. I could see the rice squirming in her mouth.

Oh, nonsense, darling, she thinks it’s amazing! Give her more!

Yes, father, give her more. She loves it!

More! More! More! the rats squealed, More! More! More!

“They’re right! You do love it!”

“No! It’s gone bad! Please!”

I fed her the rest of the dinner. It was difficult, she kept fighting me, but she ate it. I made her eat it. Someone finally ate the food I made. I was so over the moon!

Until tonight.

I made dinner again, picking the best stuff out of the cans, but when I put it on the table and, once again, no one acknowledged my work. My son stared at the ceiling and wife at her lap. Even Vivian didn’t look at it. She just sat there, vomit and blood stained on her shirt from yesterday. Her jaw bone resting on the floor next to her. No one ate anything that night. Including me. It really was starting to smell actually. I don’t think I’m as good a cook as I used to be.

[rubyeyeproductions]

Come Back

Charlie and I would’ve been together for two years at the end of April. He moved in with me after three months when his lease was up. Every time he’d leave, I’d say, “Come back to me,” and he’d say, “Always.” And he did always come back to me.

Charlie was the best thing to happen to me. My family and I don’t really talk anymore cause they didn’t agree with my “life choices,” and since then I always felt like I needed to tone myself down, I guess.

Then when Charlie came into my life, I felt like I could be myself. I didn’t need to hide who I was or act differently in public anymore. I could be me, and Charlie helped me come to terms with that. His family and friends accepted me into their lives, his sister even introduced me as her brother in law to her boyfriend. Without Charlie, I had no place. I wasted days laying in bed and allowing myself to feel sad, but Charlie helped me more than I ever could help myself.

One night Charlie went to pick up our dinner from our favorite little family restaurant. As he left, I told him “Come back to me,” and he smiled at me and said, “Always,” before kissing me.

Twenty minutes later I sent him a text saying, I miss you. Hurry back. Also, I’m hungry, where’s my food? I was just trying to be silly. But twenty minutes after that I started to actually wonder where he was, I sent another message, You get lost or something. What am I supposed to eat now? Still didn’t get an answer.

I sent a few more texts before calling him. It went straight to voicemail. I was going to call him again, but I was getting a call from a number I didn’t recognize. I answered it immediately thinking it was Charlie.

It was the hospital.

Charlies was on his way home with the food when he went through a red light, the police think he was looking at his phone. A car smashed into him and he rolled. When an ambulance came, he was barely conscious and losing a lot of blood. I was told he was talking a lot about me, saying things like, “I have to get home. I have dinner. He’s waiting for dinner.” His last words were, “Oh, he’s going to be mad at me.”

Charlie, I’m not mad at you, I’m mad at me.

If I hadn’t sent a text he’d be here. We’ve had fights before about him texting and driving, but I knew it was a thing he does, so I shouldn’t have texted him. This is all my fault.

His funeral was closed casket, the glass shards cut his face up pretty bad. His sister told me at the funeral that Charlie was thinking about proposing to me. I know she was trying to help, but that only made it hurt so much more.

His parents offered me a place to stay with them. I didn’t want to sleep alone in our bed, so I took them up on the offer. I slept there for a week before I felt like I was imposing. I stayed another five days before I actually left. Then I stayed at a friend’s place for another week or so. Each time, no matter what I was sleeping on, an air mattress or a couch, I still felt like there was so much room and there was something missing.

Last night was the first night back at our place. It felt so empty and quiet. Everything just reminded me of him. I broke down and started crying in the middle of the living room. When I tried to go to bed, I missed his arms around me. I missed feeling his warmth. The bed was so big. I was in an empty ocean. Every second that passed just made it worse and worse.

Halfway through the night while I was sleeping, I felt a sink in the bed. In my half asleep, dream like state, I asked, “Charlie?”

The response I got was, “I’m here. I’m back.”

“I didn’t think you’d come back to me.”

“I always do, don’t I?”

“I’m so happy you’re back.”

“I was just waiting for you to come home.”

I smiled. I had Charlie’s arms around me. I could feel his body against mine. It felt so cold.

“Honey, are you cold?”

“Freezing.”

“Move closer. I’ll warm you up.”

He pressed his body tighter around me. His arms felt stiff and cold. I didn’t think much of it. I was happy to have my Charlie back. As I drifted off to sleep, I heard him whisper, “I love you,” in my ear.

The next morning, I woke up and something smelled really bad. I tried to move, but something was holding me in place. I looked down and saw arms wrapped around me. The skin was decaying and rotten. I started to scream and fought my way out of it. The arms broke off. Charlie’s arms.

When I jumped out of bed, I saw him lying next to me. I could tell it was Charlie, but his skin was falling off its bones. His bones. My Charlie’s. The sheet was moving and when I threw it aside, I saw maggots crawling all over his body. There was still a small smile on his face.

Charlie didn’t move when I said his name. His body was stiff and cold to the touch. There was a foul odor that came off of him. Seeing the maggots all over the body of the man I used to love made me feel sick. But there’s still a part of me that is happy. Happy because, like he always said he would, my Charlie came back to me.

[rubyeyeproductions]

[rubyeyeproductions]

Acrylic on canvas

[rubyeyeproductions]

[rubyeyeproductions]

[rubyeyeproductions]

Made with iced coffee, colored pencils, and a pen.

[rubyeyeproductions]

See Ya Around

Every Friday I go to the Starbucks near my office for lunch. I used to think the boy behind the counter was nice. He looks maybe 18, 20 at the most. Last time after getting my stuff, I said to him, “See ya around.” I thought it was a normal thing to say since I come in once a week, but he just stared at me, the ends of his lips slightly turned up into a smile, and said, “Okay.” I thought that was a strange response but who cares. I went back to work, and the rest of the day was fine.

But then I actually started to see him around. I didn’t think anything of it at first. I’d see him at the grocery store walking past the isle I was in or walking out of the bank as I’m walking in. Just silly stuff, like how you run into your neighbors or old friends. Who knows, I might’ve crossed paths with him many times before and just never noticed till now.

I only started to realize things were weird when I saw him while picking my girlfriend, Emily, up from work. She’s an elementary school teacher, so I was parked outside the school as all the kids were leaving and I saw him sitting on a bench maybe waiting to pick up a little brother or sister or something. He was looking my way, so I waved to him. He didn’t react. He just kept staring. And smiling?

It wasn’t quite a smile. The ends of his mouth were raised just slightly, almost like the beginning of smile that froze. I kept waiting for his smile to widen, but it only ever stayed halfcocked.

That’s when I noticed that he was still in his uniform. Same black hat with the logo, black shirt, and a green apron in the front. And he just stared. And smiled. At first it was funny. He felt very out of place in his uniform and he just sat so still, it looked silly. But then his friendly face started to look sinister. He didn’t change his smile or expression, it was just, the more I looked, the creepier his face became.

My girlfriend got in the car and asked me what I was looking at, so I pointed to the guy on the bench and asked her if she knew why he was there. She kept saying she couldn’t see anybody, but I thought that might’ve been because of all the kids walking out, but she finally said, “Honey, there is nobody sitting on the bench.” I turned to look at her and when I turned back, he was gone. She asked if I was okay and I just made up an excuse about a long day at work.

As the week went on it got really bad. I’d be driving down the street and see him on the side of the road. Not even 10 minutes later and he’d be on the side of the road again, a few miles down, waiting for me. He’d be on the bus next to my car, looking at me through the window. In store fronts where the mannequins are as I walk down the street. Everywhere.

At work, I sit right next to the vending machines and people often stop and talk next to them when getting something. I looked up and saw two of my coworkers talking as one of them got a snack and standing in between them was the Starbucks employee. He was still staring at me. My coworkers took no notice of him, but he was standing right in the middle of them. Not even six feet from me.

I understand this sounds funny, seeing an out of place Starbucks employee everywhere you go, but the humor starts to get lost pretty quick. I never felt alone. I always felt like I was being watched. Actually, it felt more like I was being observed, almost like some sort of experiment. One time I tried walking up to him, but when I got within arms-reach of him I blinked and he was gone. Whereever I go he’s just there. He’s never walking towards me, never says anything, I don’t even think he blinks. He is always just there!

Luckily Wednesdays are date night, so I was excited to go out with Emily and not think about it. But when we got to the restaurant and sat down, a few rows back and off to the side, was the same guy, just sitting alone, at a table. Staring. Emily must’ve noticed I was freaked out because she turned around and tried to see what I was looking at but didn’t notice anything. I tried to point him out but she saw nothing. She sked me if I was okay, but I just told her I was fine. She must’ve understood I didn’t want to talk about it and we moved on.

Yet he was always in the corner of my vision as I looked at her. I could feel his eyes on me.

When we left, I rushed us out of there as fast as I could. When Emily asked why I was rushing, I just said I wanted to take her to see a movie and I didn’t want to be late, she said it was sweet, but I could tell she didn’t entirely believe me. She seemed concerned.

At the theater we got our tickets and some food and the entire time I saw him in the lobby. No matter where I walked his body would just turn in my direction. He wouldn’t move, but his body would, almost like he was standing on a turntable or something. I could see Emily wanted to ask me if I was okay, but she never did.

Once in our seats and with the lights off I started to relax. There was no way to see him now and the movie should distract me. And it did. Until about halfway through I saw him in the background. Still in uniform. Still staring at me.

When the angle changed, he was still in the same position on the screen, just closer. And when it cut again, he was closer. Cut, closer. Cut, closer. Eventually he was in the center of the screen, taking up the whole frame. All he was did was stare. And I don’t mean, like, staring at the camera, but me. He was looking down at me, like he was 40 feet tall on the screen.

I couldn’t even hear the movie anymore. I just heard silence as I stared back up, too scared to move. Everyone in the theater laughed at a joke I couldn’t hear. But all I wanted to do was scream. Emily leaned over and asked what was wrong and I told her I felt sick and ran to the bathroom.

I went to the bathroom to try and clear my head. I could see his eyes staring at me through the crack in the stall. I charged out of it ready to swing, but he was gone, just fucking vanished. When I walked out of the bathroom Emily was waiting for me. She said she could tell I wasn’t okay we should probably leave. I said okay probably more enthusiastically then I should’ve but I couldn’t help it, he was in the poster on the wall behind her.

When I dropped her off at her place she said she was concerned. She said, “I don’t know what’s going on and I understand you don’t want to talk about it, but I’ll be here when you’re ready. Until then take care of yourself. Do whatever it is you gotta do to fix this and give me a call.” As she opened the door to her apartment, I saw him sitting on her couch.

That night I was on my phone before bed going through Instagram and I saw him in the back of the pictures people were posting. And just like at the theater, he was getting closer. I tried to swipe past them as fast as I can, but it really just turned the pictures into a flip-book-like animation of him approaching the screen. I kept scrolling, which kept the animation going. That’s when he waved.

I turned my phone off and tried to go to sleep, but I felt like I was just seeing him with my eyes closed as if he was painted on the inside of my eyelids. I didn’t get any sleep.

The next morning, I started to notice him in the photos in my apartment. Pictures of me and my girlfriend on our first date, my sister’s wedding, my family on vacation in Italy, he was always there with us. My sister even has her arm around him and his around her.

I saw him on the way to work. I saw him at work. I saw him on the way home from work. At one point I slammed on my brakes because I saw him in the rearview mirror in the back seat. When I looked up to drive, he was in front of my car. I just stared at him, but then I decided to take action. I floored the pedal and drove straight for him. My car went through him like he was mist. I sped all the way home.

I am terrified and don’t feel safe. He’s everywhere, all the time! Home, work, streets, mall, computer, phone, pictures. I feel like I’m losing my goddamn mind. I want to call a priest and get an exorcism. I want to get a witch to lift this fucking curse off me. I just want this to fucking end! This sounds funny, I know, but trust me, this is horrifying. This feels like I’m living out a joke that lost all its humor. I don’t want to live like this anymore and I just want to be left alone. I’d stay home, but he’s in the photos at my apartment, I’d take them down, but he’d be in my phone. I’d gouge out my eyes, but then he would probably be all I ever see for the rest of my life. He’s always there and I’m no longer ever alone.

I hate Starbucks.