sadetta

[sadetta]

everyone on replies is terrified of this fact but i just think it's so sweet and heartwarming. she's holding our hand and leading us somewhere secret and we're both giggling like kids. i love her

[sadetta]

Are you normal or do you have hypervigilence problems because you always had to be aware of your family members moods growing up in order to deescalate situations before the arose

[sadetta]

Oh so you mean to tell me your city *doesnt* have the Horse Car? Oh ok

[sadetta]

I hate when I say things like "oh I want an ipod classic but with bluetooth so I can use wireless headphones" and some peanut comes in and replies with "so a smartphone with spotify?" No. I want a 160GB+ rectangular monstrosity where I can download every version of every song I want to it and it does nothing except play music and I don't need a data connection and don't have to pay a subscription to not have ads and don't have popups suggesting terrible AI playlists all over the menus.

Gimme the clicky wheel and song titles like "My Chemical Romance- The Black Parade- Blood (Bonus Track)- secret track- album rip- high quality"

[sadetta]

[sadetta]

Writing essays in french : Part 2

2 Detailing and illustrating

2.1 Adding and listing

Les options qui s’offrent au (or à, à la, aux) gouvernement sont peu nombreuses : ou bien augmenter les impôts, ou encore se défendre, ou enfin capituler devant l’armée ennemie. There are few options open to the government: either…

On sait déjà que …   Plus important encore … A noter également que … Il faut compter aussi avec … La possibilité enfin de X n'est pas à exclure  We already know that … More important still,… It should also be noted that…One should also mention… The possibility of X cannot be ruled out

Le plus grand avantage de X tient dans ……. A ce premier avantage s'ajoute le fait que … Si l'on ajoute à cela / le fait que … on voit bien l'intérêt que l'on peut avoir à faire The biggest advantage of X lies in its … To this first advantage can be added the fact that … If one adds to that the fact that…one can see the benefits of doing Parmi les désavantages de X compte … L'un des autres risques est que … Y est également très inquiétant Among the disadvantages of X is … One of the other risks is … Y is also very worrying

Start :  tout d'abord, en premier lieu - first of all pour commencer - to start off with premièrement - firstly Middle :  ensuite - next   de plus - in addition en outre - furthermore qui plus est - what is more de surcroît - moreover à ceci s'ajoute / il s'y ajoute - to this can be added encore - also en deuxième (etc) lieu - secondly par ailleurs - in addition End : en dernier lieu - lastly enfin - finally pour terminer / achever - to finish up with quant à - as for

2.2 Introducing sources / quotations

D’après / Selon le ministre, ses propos à ce sujet auraient été déformés According to the minister, his remarks on the subject have been misquoted Comme le font remarquer les auteurs du rapport, il y a un fort risque que l'économie entre en récession vers la fin de l'année As the authors of the report point out, there is a strong risk of the economy going into recession towards the end of the year Comme le laisse entendre la presse / A en croire les journaux le ministre était au courant du problème d’avance As the press are suggesting / If the papers are to be believed the minister knew about the problem in advance Dans un article apparu dans Le Monde du 2 mars 2002, X rapporte que … In an article which appeared in Le Monde on 2 March 2002, X reports that De nombreux observateurs ont émis la crainte que Many observers have expressed the fear that…

Un consensus semble se dégager selon lequel… A consensus seems to be emerging according to which… Dans une étude consacrée au problème de l'échec scolaire, les auteurs affirment que les inégalités liées aux origines sociales des élèves demeurent In a report looking into the problem of failure at school, the authors maintain that inequalities linked to the social origins of pupils remain Selon un rapport réalisé pour le Ministère de la Santé / Une étude menée par l'INSEE en 2001 montre que … A report carried out by Office of National Statistics shows that … Avoiding using dire affirmer que - to maintain that ajouter que - to add that assurer que - to maintain that constater que - to note that déclarer que - to state, declare that estimer que - to think that préciser que - to state that prétendre que - to claim that rapporter que - to report that remarquer que - to point out that souligner que - to stress that soutenir que - to maintain that

Note that French has many more verbs than English for presenting direct speech: « …» a affirmé / assuré / évoqué / soutenu le ministre “ … ” said the Minster

2.3 Introducing an example

Prenons à titre d’exemple l’affaire du sang contaminé/ Considérons l’exemple de l'affaire du sang contaminé Let us take by way of an example / Let us consider the example of the contaminated blood affair Il suffit de prendre pour exemple l'affaire Elf pour nous rappeler que les hommes politiques ne sont pas tous honnêtes We only need to take the example of the case of the Elf affair to remind us that not all polticians are honest L'éducation sexuelle ne rend pas forcément les jeunes plus responsables dans ce domaine. Le pourcentage de demande de pilules du lendemain dans les lycées en est une illustration frappante. Sex education does not necessarily make young people act more responsibly in this domain. The demand for morning-after pill from sixth-formers is a striking illustration of this. Un exemple significatif / frappant de ce problème est fourni par… A significant / striking example of this problem can be found in… Ces cas ne font qu'illustrer le problème du chômage dans cette région de la France These cases just serve to illustrate the problem of unemployment in this part of France

2.4 Introducing one’s own point of view

À mon avis / Selon moi – In my opinion Pour ma part / En ce qui me concerne – As far as I’m concerned A mon sens – As I see it Il me semble que – It seems to me that J’estime que – I consider that Je soutiens que – I maintain that Je suis d’avis que - I’m of the opinion that Je suis persuadé que – I am convinced that À mon avis / Selon moi la mondialisation présente des opportunités aussi bien que des inconvénients In my opinion globalisation offers opportunities as well as disadvantages Pour ma part / En ce qui me concerne je crois qu'il devrait y avoir un referendum pour régler cette question For my part / As far as I’m concerned I think there should be a referendum to settle this matter Je suis d’avis que la décentralisation ne peut être que bénéfique pour l’économie I’m of the opinion that decentralization can only be beneficial to the economy

[sadetta]

[sadetta]

Can you give some blowjob tips? I need to improve lol

Aight get ready to get ur hoe on, this is everything I know. And this is what works for me, so try it out and play around w it see what works for u and whats enjoyable for ur partner and suck his soul outta is body. Remember you can’t half-ass this shit it wont be enjoyable for you or him, you gotta dive right in like the sex god(dess) you are:

Tease him, don’t just jump right in. Make out & stroke him over his clothes, rub and squeeze a bit. Kiss his damn neck, don’t forget his nipples, they sensitive 2 (play w it, lick it - pro tip: a light touch is A+)

kiss your way down, be sensual & shit, guys love that shit; look up @ him when u do, that’s sexy as hell; get comfortable cause I know when I don’t take time to position myself my knees and hips hurt like a bitch, I like sitting/kneeling between his legs if he’s laying down or sitting. If he’s standing its not as bad 

I like to stroke and pump him lightly a few times a few times while I try to gather saliva in my mouth. how you want to start is up 2 u. Licking his length or putting the tip in your mouth (i like this one). I like to switch it up tho, so go crazy. Establishing eye contact when u do this is hella erotic too. Kiss his belly (like below his belly button and above his pubic area - if u wanna kiss there thats fine too I don’t cause pubes), kiss his thighs (guys love this too)

People say roll your lips over your teeth (like an old person) so you don’t scrape his weewee but like????? that dont work with me & makes it more difficult, I don’t have much trouble with my teeth. Just keep your lips flat over your teeth (don’t pull your lips up like with a toothy smile) and you’ll be fine.

The 1st 10-15 seconds, I’m just trying to get him as wet as possible with spit (and you can use this to see how much of him you can fit in your mouth) so bounce your head a few times and suck, test how far in you can fit him, get messy and get it wet (as much as you can) guys LOVE sloppy cause it feels much better. If you have difficulty with this, try hitting the back of your throat. If you gag a little it’ll produce more saliva but back up immediately. In my experience, if I’m enjoying myself and getting into it then I produce a lot more spit. If it’s still difficult invest in some lube.

Go fuckin wild. The main thing is to suck on it obv. Bounce your head up and down, use your hand(s) to stroke what you can’t fit in your mouth. Swirl your tongue around while you suck on him. Alternate your speeds, go fast for a few seconds then slow down. And vary your sucking strength too. Sometimes you gotta suck him like its the end of the world and switch it up and do it lightly to tease him. A trick is “hollowing out your cheeks”, you’re basically pulling your cheeks in like when you make a “goldfish face” or when your contour LMAO this makes it super tight - I can’t do this for very long gotta watch out for teeth when u do this tho. It’s okay to take breaks from sucking and take him out of your mouth, just keep stroking him with your hand. And lick his length (eye contact!!)

I know some guys like to face fuck a girl, mine doesn’t really. But if he does and you’re comfortable with it then just relax your mouth and let him do the work. I tend to flex the back of my throat when ths happens or else it’ll hit my gag reflex. Remember to talk about it before hand (usually a guy will ask if he can) make sure you have a signal or something to back off because it can get overwhelming especially if he’s larger and/or doing very hard.

During strokes, squeeze a little tighter when you’re pulling towards the tip (you) than when you’re going towards him. it’s okay to use a tight grip (don’t hulk it) but I found that light teasing touches are gr8 too. Focus on the head, do small strokes on the tip, run your thumb over it. Lightly lick the tip and flick your tongue around and play w it. Take the tip into your mouth and suck on it

Don’t forget about his balls! They’re super super sensitive. When you need a break from sucking, keep stroking his shaft, and lick his balls. Try and take them in your mouth suck on em and swirl them around with your tongue (try taking both if u can u champ; if not one @ a time is good too). But you definitely have to be more careful with them because you can easily hurt him. When you’re sucking on his penis, massage his balls lightly (hella sensations)

okay my finishing move; if he hasn’t come yet that day (my partner and I go several rounds so) this will finish him right off. When you’re sucking him, try to take him as far in as you can that you’re still comfortable with and tense and flex the muscles there. A swallowing motion around his penis, while you’re sucking. This might take some practice to flex it while still sucking so it’s okay to actually swallow, it’ll just prevent you from sucking. If you moan or hum during this the vibrations will make it even better. If you can deep throat him then hell yeah hell yeah, go u (i can’t lmao)

Pay attention to his reactions. If his breathing gets erratic, his grip gets tighter, moan, or buckle his hips when you’re doing a certain move then keep doing it. Observe him and what he likes. It’s really helpful if he communicates, I know certain guys don’t though. So ask him, say “oh you like that?” “this feel good?” I like to keep it playful and joke if I know he’s enjoying it “oh you like that? want me to keep going?” etc. it’ll classify as dirty talk and help guide you to do more of what he likes.

When he’s close, focus on the tip. Usually guys will let you know (if he doesn’t, tell him beforehand to give you a warning) I always swallow, if you can: do it. It’s sexy for him, and less of a mess. Try to swallow while he’s cumming, cause in my experience if I wait and let it pool in my mouth, it’ll be unpleasant it gets messy & leaks when you remove your mouth. While he’s cumming, do light sucking motions on his head, don’t take him all the way in (I angle his penis up towards the roof of my mouth instead of the back of my throat cause if you have a gag reflex then whoa buddy ur in for a surprise. I don’t even have a sensitive one and it made me gag and tear up because ejaculation comes out at a v fast pace.)

If you can’t swallow then try to keep it in your mouth and go to the bathroom to spit it out. Try and take it like a trooper, because if you make faces of disgust it’ll make him feel bad. If you really don’t want him to, then talk about it with him beforehand and come to an agreement, maybe let him cum on you, in your hand, or something. I don’t like doing this because it is really messy, especially if he has a big load (which mine does). My guy and I have an agreement that he can cum on me if we’re in the shower cause it washes right off.

And last thing: not mandatory obviously but it’ll make your life easier. If you have long hair I recommend tying it up in a ponytail. It makes it neater, it’s gives him a good view of what you’re doing. And it’s something for him to grab onto (and pull - if you’re into that).

Have fun, do your best, remember that this takes time and it’s not something you get great at overnight (but if u do then good for u), it takes time. So go out there and make them moan and cuss under their breath with your blowjob skills.

[sadetta]

narcissism/NPD recovery resources, because there’s like nothing good out there

Books and things to read:

Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations by Dr. Elinor Greenburg - Aimed at providers but apparently super great for self-help too

How Do You Develop Whole Object Relations as an Adult? by Dr. Elinor Greenburg - Tips on how to stop seeing yourself and other people as only either all-good or all-bad

10 Stages in the Treatment of Narcissistic Disorders by Dr. Elinor Greenburg - Goes through the stages of treating NPD

Rethinking Narcissism by Dr. Craig Malkin - A book about promoting healthy narcissism instead of unhealthy narcissism

Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic and Histrionic Workbook: Treatment Strategies for Cluster B Personality Disorders by Dr. Daniel Fox - what it says on the tin. May be best done guided by a therapist

Shame in patients with narcissistic personality disorder PDF - What it says on the tin.

Narcissus and the Daffodils - an essay about NPD by someone with NPD. Probably the best description I’ve ever seen

Things to watch and listen to:

Recovery FOR the Narcissist by Dr. Eric Perry - A compassionate podcast to provide insight, support, and encouragement to anyone who exhibits narcissistic tendencies. Very in-depth

Early Morning Barking - A YouTube channel by someone with BPD and NPD about coping with and educating people on BPD and NPD. He also has a Recovery from NPD by Dr. Todd Grande - A video about this provider’s experience with helping people recover from NPD

Misc:

Narcissism Self Help Therapy website - A daily program for people with NPD (may have some triggering aspects in Part 2 of the program)

NPD Safe carrd resources - More resources for NPD (I have not gone through all of these so I don’t know how good they are)

NPD Recovery Comics by The Ego System - A bunch of fantastic comics about recovering from NPD.

[sadetta]

[sadetta]

Norma with the sunlight across her face (2023)

[sadetta]

[sadetta]

Napping fox

[sadetta]

-Ask Polly

[sadetta]

oh how being loved is to be flawed in a world full of repulsive reflections of perfection

so lonesome and mysterious that the simple act of your company is rebellion

I'll see to it, some other day

I'll sleep another night

live another day

a little closer to serenity

lend some time this way

there is no second act

so I'll promise stay

though I know I'll wake up feeling the same

and I never catch the train in that dream

Something is collapsing, giving in

something at the tip of your tongue

it's getting late, isn't it?

the brittle prayer of my heart asking: will you be the one to stay?

[sadetta]

Just finished Turtles All The Way Down by John Green. Truthfully, I am a wreck. I have never felt more seen in my entire life than when I was reading that book.

For those who don’t know, Turtles All The Way Down follows a 16yo girl named Aza who lives with OCD. Aza and her friends are trying to solve a mystery with lots of her mental illness dispersed in it. It’s an amazing, AMAZING book especially since the author, John Green is writing from his own experience with OCD.

This book is one for sure that I will keep close to my heart!

[sadetta]

One this day, 12 years ago in 2011, Amy Winehouse was found dead in her home at the age of 27.