scolopendrisims

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i will not be having an ipad baby. i will be having a Pea baby

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i remember you from when we were bugs

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bouncing on his everything

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I modified my Reverend Daughter piece into a tapestry design 🖤 I’ll unveil these at Kami-Con next weekend, as well as in my shop later this month

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Harrowhark but she's Blood of Eden and her name is Spooky Scary Skeletons Send Shivers Down Your Spine. Is this anything.

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average day on the mithraeum

ianthe: haha harrow wants me so bad it makes her look stupid 😈

mercy: why didn’t i kill myself ten thousand years ago

john gaius: [playing 2048 on his ipad] my life is completely normal and great and my friends all love each other :)

gideon the first: i think i have encephalitis

augustine: when i’m in the club yeah im bumpin that 365 party girl bumpin that should we do a lil key should we have a lil line wanna go real wild when im bumpin that meet me in the bathroom if you’re bumpin that 365 party girl bumpin that french manicure wipe away the residue

pyrrha: i’m pretty sure gideon has encephalitis

harrow:

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dulcinea septimus......big fan....

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It turns out that in the Hungarian translation of Harrow, dios apate minor and major are translated as "deception of Zeus, dry" and deception of Zeus, wet" respectively, which I find hilarious and aptly gross.

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trying my best to haunt the narrative but no one really gives a shit

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chekhov’s iron fence that had once protected some herbaceous border, as though its bent, bowed spikes would be good for anything other than throwing herself down on as one last fuck-you salute

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i didn’t KILL naberius tern. i ATE naberius tern.

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Breaking bone

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and you're telling me the popular ship in the fandom is gideon/harrow and not gideon/dulcinea. that's what i'm given to understand. no one else is melting at gideon saying very genuinely "i don't want you to die". no one else is really really smitten with dulcinea and practically swoons when she talks

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picturing griddlehark college/otherwise normal aus is so fucking funny. like. you meet this lesbian couple, right. one of them is on a full sports scholarship, she's big, beefy, a little lacking in social skills but obviously happy to try. she swears every other sentence, has a poster of megan fox in transformers in her bedroom like a 13 year old boy. she's got an anime girl phone background. she wears a black choker all the time which does NOT match her otherwise purely sun's-out-guns-out-paired-with-cargo-shorts type wardrobe.

the other one is a full head shorter than her and shaped like a stick, wears exclusively big, shapeless cardigans and skirts that reach her ankles, will not speak to anyone but the beefcake in full sentences if she can avoid it, and visibly has not slept in a week. the one time you convince her to speak, she ends up insulting you in the most unnecessarily graphic and specific terms you have ever heard, gives you a look which singlehandedly curdles every ounce of self-esteem you've ever possessed, and immediately returns her attention to studying.

one day, you finally work up the courage to ask how the fuck they met and why they're dating. they tell you that they both grew up in a small-town christian cult which the stick figure's parents actually led, beat the shit out of each other daily for their entire childhoods, and finally resolved their differences in their late teens and immediately ran away together. the stick figure twitches up a sleeve of her oversize black cardigan to reveal a bracelet made of the beefcake's baby teeth that she personally knocked out of her skull. the beefcake smiles at her like this is the height of romance. the only issue they will acknowledge in their relationship is that when she was little, the stick figure fell madly in love with a painting of the virgin mary and has never quite recovered. they've been married for 3 years. they are 20 years old.

also the beefcake wears the choker because the stick figure said "no" to dog collars in public.

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the arm scene but it’s gideon’s heart

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i miss her like a mf...🚬

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