seeingivy

[seeingivy]

electric touch

satoru gojo x f!reader

**part of my satoru as taylor swift songs series

an: the new and improved (not really)... tumblr delete this post again and I will attack you.

--

it’s almost like getting primed for a reward. the tiny little breaks between when satoru got to see you – it functioned like a charging port. 

satoru would get the sweet, soft promise of your presence. and then be robbed of it consequently. and it would leave him a little bit hollow in the days that followed, until it came rushing back – when you had to pick up leo at the end of the week. 

he likened it to him being like a ghost town. and that you would fill him up with light. 

and the sweet promise comes flowing back, an almost instantaneous rush, when he gets a less than pleasant phone call about his son getting into a fight at school – and how both parents would need to be present for the meeting that followed. 

--

one of the greatest strengths in his relationship with you – if he could even call it that anymore – was that the two of you were always able to read each other. it’s how two halves of a whole functioned – adapted to be what the other one needed. 

satoru had never been able to find that in someone else. and sometimes, late at night, he’d wonder if it was because the two of you were soulmates, that you were so connected, that it was the reason you could feel what the other needed. 

or if you had forged yourselves into ones, by having a child together – a little perfect piece of you and him in the world that tied you together. that the secret to it was that when you made leo, there was some part of your souls that were shared forever now. 

the thought dies out on its own, when he’s faced with the harsh reality. 

soulmates would never be separated. on the heels of a divorce. 

so he swallows down the thought. and it comes rushing back to him at times like this – when he’s speeding through the streets and running into the office – only to find the pair of you pressing ice packs into your respective faces, matching steely glares being given to the pair of people across from you. 

leo spares him the glance first. you don’t break. 

“daddy’s here.” 

leo’s voice is uncharacteristically monotone, the usual cheery delight – that satoru claims to take credit for – is gone and it’s chilling. that and the fact that his eye is going to definitely purple up by tomorrow. satoru takes the seat next to you, passing you a halfhearted smile as you meet his eyes, and he gestures for leo with grabby hands to take the place in his lap. 

leo all but obliges and satoru takes the close proximity to inspect the little bruise near his eye. it’s raised and red – the white of his eye tinted a tiny pink. 

one of his favorite things about leo was that his eyes were just like yours. seeing someone desecrate them in the slightest was enough to make him sear with a white hot rage. 

satoru would have every intention to create a living hell for whoever’s kid – and their parents – caused this. but he had a strong inkling telling him that the ice pack pressed to your cheek meant that you had already tried and it was on him to be the mature one here. that he’d have to adapt, for you. 

“hi star boy, sunshine.” satoru murmurs. 

you turn your head to his, glaring at him. this was not the time for stupid nicknames. 

“horrifying. you should try to smile more.” satoru deadpans, giving you a smile so wide you can see his dimples. 

idiot. 

“and you should try to be more mature. someone punched your son in the face.” 

“and it looks like they didn’t stop there. what happened to you? let me look.” 

satoru reaches forward, fingers featherlike as they pull the ice pack away from your face, revealing three identical red lines indented into the softness of your cheek. he cups his fingers around your face – the sensation sending an electric touch down your spine – as you try to wrestle out of his hold. 

satoru frowns. the marks are raised and swelling, just like leo’s, and satoru really curses that he didn’t drive faster. then he wouldn’t have to save face with the people who had raised their hands on his son and his wife. 

soon to be ex-wife. 

“kid’s mom. she started bitching and…and i said stuff back and she slapped me. she was wearing three pairs of stackable silver rings.” you groan, shoving the biting cold ice back into the pulsating warm of your cheek, before turning back to stare at her. 

you’d slap that smug smile off her face if you could. 

“what did she say?” satoru asks. 

“just forget about it, okay? let’s focus on leo.” 

satoru can tell by your posture, your tense shoulders, that there’s no inkling of regret in your actions. that really, you don’t even feel the smallest bit of remorse – that you think you had ever reason to do what you did. 

leo leans his mouth close to satoru’s ear, before failing his attempt at whispering discreetly. 

“i’ll tell you later, daddy. it was about you.” 

“leo.” you scold. 

“mommy.” leo mimics, attempting to copy your scathing tone. 

you can’t stop yourself and your soft smile makes both of your boys break a glimmering, two dimpled smile back in return. you reach forward, running your fingers through leo’s overgrown white hair, as you lean forward and press a kiss to the top of his locks. 

one of your favorite things about leo is how similar he looks to satoru. snow white hair, same cheesy dimple smile, and the sweet sense of humor too. 

and that sickly sweet spot that you have for satoru, that you’d probably always have, simmered. he was always able to make leo smile, even through the pink of his eye. 

after a very unpleasant meeting – and a three day suspension for leo – satoru offers to take him off your hands for the weekend. he can see it, the gratefulness in your eyes and the desperate time you need to process it all, as you press a kiss to leo’s cheek and then his too. 

it almost bites, like an electric touch – your lips on satoru’s skin after months. his ghost town’s essentially a fifty-strobe light show at this point. 

in the close proximity, your sugary perfume and soft hands, satoru’s thankful for two things at the moment. 

the first? leo sitting snug in his arms. and the second? the necklace around your collarbone. 

or more appropriately, the fact that all three charms are still intact. the sun, the star, and the moon. 

you, leo, and him. he watches as you walk away, shooting the two of them a smile over your shoulder, before you climb into your car. 

“leo?” satoru asks. 

“hm.” 

“what did mommy say when she got mad?” satoru asks. 

leo gives him a smile, curling his fist around the collar of his shirt before answering. 

“that lady needed to leave her son and her husband alone or else.” 

satoru smiles, before pressing a kiss to the warmth of leo’s cheek. he can still smell the remnants of the strawberry shampoo you massaged into his hair this morning.

--

you had been priming yourself for sunday, when satoru would return with leo. there was a certain warmth that satoru possessed, that was almost an innate part of his nature, that you always felt yourself gravitating towards. 

every time he walked away from you, it felt like he left you alone in the rain. and all you could feel was the sheer, immense pining. 

the two of you had decided that satoru was just going to take care of leo – that you’d address the fight, and your shitty behavior together at the end of the week. and if need be, satoru would stay the night just to help you out afterwards. 

satoru offered. you hate that he can still read you like a book. that he’ll make your rain cloud dissipate, just to let it reform again every time he walked away. 

at 8:05, the headlights of satoru’s car shine through your kitchen window as you reach for your hair, brushing down the flyaways, before reaching for the little sweets that you had made. they were vanilla glazed doughnuts – the byproduct of the impending doom of the possibility that satoru might share the bed with you and leo tonight. 

and right on cue, you hear two giggly voices opening the door, only to be met by leo running up and wrapping his little arms around your legs. you oblige, crouching down as you eye the purple surrounding his eye, before cradling his head against your shoulder. 

the sight almost makes satoru emotional. he’ll blame it on the longing. 

but watching you nearly moved to tears, leo’s infinitesimal smallness against your frame despite how tall he seems to be getting – it reminds him of the day leo was born. when satoru really wasn’t able to contain his tears, at the sight of you beaming down at your shared piece of starlight. that truly, the stars did align – that there were some types of odds, that each little decision the two of you made had led to him. 

“i missed you, star boy.” you murmur. 

“i missed you too, sunshine.” leo responds. 

you curl your nose, pinching his cheek before you stand up. you eye satoru – the dark green hoodie hanging loose against his frame, hands tucked into his black sweatpants. he gives you a wink as a greeting, to which you respond by sticking your tongue out, before sliding the plate over to the two of them. 

“leo, you’ve been spending too much time with daddy. what happened to calling me, mommy?” 

“you’re making that sound like that’s a bad thing, sunshine.” satoru states, nimble fingers splitting one of the doughnuts in half before handing leo a piece. 

“yeah, sunshine.” leo emphasizes, earning a fit of laughter from the two of you. 

you roll your eyes. satoru lifts leo onto the counter, before pulling a stool to the side for the two of you. he gives you a curt nod – one which you return – before you and satoru turn to face him. 

“okay, star boy. we’ve had fun for a few days but it’s time to talk about what happened tuesday.” satoru states. 

leo’s face immediately droops, and you bite down into the hardness of your cheek. 

you were never good at the reprimanding type of thing. 

“it was nothing, daddy.” leo mumbles. 

satoru sighs. 

“c’mon, kid. we’re not going to be mad at you. just want to talk about what happened, talk about what to do next time.” satoru states. 

“i don’t want you to think that it’s okay to fight with people because of me. that lady in the office, she…she just…” 

satoru’s hand is quick, finding it’s way to your back. the touch is soft, a tiny shock, accompanied by small circles being rubbed into your back. 

“she caught me at a bad time. i called her later and apologized for my mean words.” 

no, you didn’t. you would rather choke. but leo didn’t need to know that. 

leo sighs, before covering his face. you can tell that there’s a red flush creeping up his neck and that it’s going to be followed by a heavy set of tears. 

“i’m sorry.” he chokes out. 

satoru frowns, immediately reaching to hold him snug against his legs in his lap, as you lean your head on satoru’s shoulder. he’s crying into both of your arms softly, the two of you sharing a strained look, before satoru reaches forward and starts wiping his tears. 

“hey buddy. just breathe for me, okay?” satoru murmurs, his voice so soft it makes your hair stand up on it’s ends. 

“just relax, sweetheart. it’s going to be okay. we…we’re here for you.” you add, giving satoru a look. 

satoru understands what it means. there’s no way he’s leaving him tonight. 

leo cries for nearly twenty minutes, your matching pair of soothing voices calming him down until his cheeks are flushed pink, eyes swollen from the tears. satoru instinctively leans his temple against yours, giving him a quiet nod before he starts talking. 

“i hate my teacher.” leo states. 

“what?” 

“she never asks people to raise their hands when she asks a question. she-she just picks a random person out of the crowd. and whenever she does that…i hate it. my throat feels so warm and…and i get scared that she’s going to pick on me and i won’t know the answer.”  

you reach forward, combing his hair back. 

“it’s okay if you get it wrong, honey. you’re still learning.” 

leo shakes his head, so aggressively that it catches you off guard. 

“no. no, i have to get it right. you don’t get it. ” 

you swallow hard. 

“she called on me and i didn’t know the answer. and…and she was staring at me but i couldn’t say anything. daddy, i…i swear i was trying to say something but i couldn’t do it. and…and then the kid next to me told me to just answer and i…i got so mad that i punched him. and then he did it back and i got in trouble.” leo mumbles. 

satoru hums in response, nodding before he leans down to press a kiss to the top of his head. 

“okay, kid. it’s okay to be nervous sometimes when you get called on, especially when you’re not expecting it. but just remember, it doesn’t say anything about you if you get the answer wrong. and it’s okay to feel so stressed out and frustrated by what people say, but let’s find another way to deal with that without punching them, okay?” satoru asks. 

“okay.” leo groans, before crossing over his heart twice, the way the two of you had taught him to promise. 

satoru lets him jump off his legs, instructing him to go get ready for the shower, as you can’t help but stand up, busying yourself with placing the dirty dishes in the sink. your hands are nearly shaking, the buttered plates slipping out of your hands and crashing into the metallic sink as the tears start flowing, breaths heavy as your vision blurs.

it’s all your fault.  

the second leo’s footsteps subside, you can feel satoru at your side, hugging you from behind as he rubs up and down your biceps, only making your crying worse. and this time when his soft, soothing voice is whispering in your ears and not leo’s, all you can do is crumble in his arms. 

“that was not your fault.” satoru states. 

you sigh. 

“isn’t it though? he-he gets that from me.” 

satoru places his hands on your shoulders, twisting you around until you’re facing him, his fingers pushing your cheeks up. your watery, pink eyes meet his as he reaches forward to swipe the wetness away and he can tell that one of your worst, most misplaced fears, has come to fruition. 

that your son would inherit your self-proclaimed horrible coping mechanisms from you. satoru always found it frustrating when you said that – because he was always of the belief that you were doing the best with what you were given – not that you would ever agree with him. 

that you weren’t a misplaced perfectionist, it’s just that your parents asked too much of you. that you weren’t a ball of anxiety crumbling at the threads, you were a master of adapting to what was called of you. 

“he does not get that from you. that’s not how it works.” satoru states. 

“satoru. that’s exactly how i sounded as a kid. i had to be the best or i was nothing. and when i got anxious, i-i could barely even stand talking to other people sometimes. going to class. and-and it’s even worse. changing his environment all the time doesn’t help. he misses you. and then he probably misses me when he’s with you. and it’s probably so confusing that he doesn’t even know what’s happening and it’s all my fault because i’m a bad mom-” 

satoru presses his fingers to your lips, hard. 

“you are not a bad mom. leo adores you. i adore you. i wouldn’t want anyone else to be with us other than you.” 

you ignore the implication. it’s underlying – that satoru thinks the reason for your separation, almost divorce – is stupid. and maybe there’s even a small part of him that would resent you for it, letting his family get in your head. 

that you weren’t the suitable wife for the clan. that you couldn’t be his wife because of it. 

you figured it would be better for leo. not having to live with the pressure to live up to their standards. he was already kind of predisposed to that type of thing – that some part of your horrible traits was somehow in his genetics now – and putting him somewhere it could fester into a mess would make it worse. 

and you hated it. watching satoru fight with them, tire himself out just to advocate for him, on your behalf. that most days he would be tired, that you were causing strife in their family, and that he had to put them all aside for you. 

and if it meant that you had to give up your relationship for both of them to be free of that, that was the price you had to will yourself to pay. 

“satoru.” 

he reaches forward, fingers resting against the silver chain. his blue eyes are razor focused on the charms. 

“i’ll stay with you till leo’s a little better. i agree, i don’t like the idea of him moving around so much when he’s clearly overwhelmed and going through something.” 

“yeah?” you whisper. 

“are you really shocked that i want to spend time with my son?” 

“no! but…you have to live here with me. and he’s mostly at school all the time, you know.” 

satoru rolls his eyes, before he leans forward, hands warm on your hips. 

“i used to live with you too, you know? i actually enjoyed it too if you can wrap your big head around the thought.” 

“shut up. you know that’s not what i meant.” 

--

it works well. you can tell that it helps leo – and you too – having satoru around all the time. you wake up later, get started on breakfast a little while satoru tasks himself with getting leo ready for school. you go to bed earlier, only because satoru threatens to destory your laptop if you stay up even a wink past the late hours of the night. 

you eat together in the morning, dinner whenever leo’s back from soccer practice. satoru puts some cheesy family movie marathon together on the weekends, and you make them breakfast for dinner on tuesday nights. 

it almost works too well. 

when leo leaves, satoru always makes sure to brew you a coffee before he runs out for work. you always make him lunch before you leave for your errands. sometimes he joins you at the store. you go to his work dinners with him. 

you’re getting too close to the fire. you’re going to get burned again. 

you had a history of stories ending sadly. the cautionary tale just never seemed to work when it came to you. 

and it comes to a head at the goodbye dinner satoru takes you to for his boss, masamichi. or more appropriately in the car afterwards, as the two of you wait outside nanami’s house for leo to come running out from his play date with yuuji and megumi. 

“masamichi was checking you out. one last time, for good measure.” satoru states. 

you roll your eyes. satoru had a stupid hunch that his boss, had a thing for you since the first time he started bringing you to his work dinners. you just think he’s paranoid. and obsessive – like a little kid with a toy. 

just because he for some reason liked you didn’t mean that everyone else did too. 

“satoru. your geriatric and married boss was not checking me out.” 

“what does him being married have to do with it? that doesn’t stop people.” satoru states. 

you click your tongue in your cheek. 

“did you look at other girls while we were married?” you ask, giving him a grin. 

“fuck off. no, i did not.” 

“and masamichi didn’t either. you’re just trying to find a reason to fight with him.” 

“well, he was leering his eyes at my wife. you try staying calm when he does that.” satoru defends. 

you scoff. 

“grow up, satoru. we’re not married.” you state. 

it was hard to establish the boundaries, especially with someone as pushy as satoru. that and the fact that the real semantics of the matter never seemed to work in your favor. 

“oh, yeah?” satoru teases. 

“yes, satoru.” you deadpan. 

satoru reaches for your hand, sending an electric jolt up your arm, before holding your left out in front of him. and before you can protest, he presses a warm kiss to your knuckles, dead center on your ring finger – right above your engagement ring and your wedding band. it’s enough to leave a burning pit in your stomach, cheeks searing from the touch. 

“satoru. it’s just because we were out at dinner together.” you murmur. 

satoru’s eyes are nearly lidded, the tantalizing look in his eyes nearly making you shuffle in your seat as he leans forward, fingers around the silver chain around your neck. he uses it to pull you forward, noses bumping and lips a few feet apart before he whispers. 

“then why are you still wearing this? i know you remember what i said when i gave it to you.” 

you do remember. 

satoru gifted the necklace to you the day leo was born, after the two of you decided to name him after the constellation. because leo was your star and you were his sun. that by simple rules of elimination, he was going to be the moon and the three of you were going to be together forever. 

it was cheesy at the time. even worse when satoru decided to make the entire nursery space themed. but now, it stings. the cosmic connection that the two of you seem to have, almost pulsating with electricity, it stings. burns. it’s agonizing. 

“i don’t know, satoru. i can’t separate the moon from the sun and the star.” you murmur. 

“so why are you trying so hard to do it right now?” satoru whispers. 

you shake your head, trying to pull back, but his grasp on the necklace has him yanking you forward again, your forehead resting against yours as you feel your chest nearly start heaving. 

“satoru.” 

“why are you trying so hard to get rid of me?” he murmurs. 

because it goes the same every time. and you can’t do it a fifth time. 

you’ve gotten used to him not calling your phone. gotten used to sleeping alone. and the thought of the sliver of goodness this one moment will give you compared to the weeks, months of hurt that will come to pass after…

it simply wasn’t worth it. and it wasn’t something you could bring yourself to stomach. 

and you’re not sure what it is. the cool air coming out of the air vents of the car, the dim green light casting on his soft features, or his alluring voice – why you always abandon the rational thought. 

but you lean forward. only to be interrupted by leo smacking his little fist against the window. 

“can you open the door? it’s cold out here.” he whines. 

the two of you pull apart fast, satoru swallowing hard as he reaches for the lock, and you awkwardly tuck your hair behind your ears. leo climbs into the car as you reach back for one of his hands, shaking one of his, and giving him your peachiest smile. 

good timing, leo. 

“hi star boy. did you say hi to uncle nanami for me?” you ask. 

satoru reverses out of the spot, his cheeks still pink, as he heads out onto the street. 

“yes, i did. he says hi back. what were you guys doing in the car?” 

“i was checking mommy’s teeth for cavities. she’s been laying it a little heavy on the sweets.” satoru states. 

you smack him across the chest. 

--

one month after the fact and you realize that it’s gone too far. that leo’s okay now, that he’s been okay for a while, and there’s no reason for you to be sharing a bed, morning breakfast, a life with satoru gojo anymore. 

and when leo runs out for the bus, blowing the two of you a big kiss to your spot on the porch, you brace yourself for the impact when satoru follows you back inside, lazily leaning his entire weight on you as he maneuvers you to the coffee machine. 

“what are you feeling this morning, sunshine?” 

“caramel. and…and that you could maybe go home now?” 

it’s enough to wake satoru up. he turns to his side, hands still focused on making your coffee, as he glares at you. 

“you have a shit sense of humor.” satoru states. 

“i’m serious. leo’s doing well, thankfully. i think he’ll be okay now to go back to how it was before.” 

satoru rolls his eyes. 

“you don’t know that. for all we know, that was brought on by the fact that he was splitting his time between both of us when we should all be together. changing environments won’t help him, things need to be consistent for his sake.” 

“satoru. we…we can’t go on like this.” 

satoru frowns, leaving your cup of coffee unattended as it brews, the earthy smell filling your nose as he closes the distance, hands on your cheeks. 

“yes, we can.” he whispers. 

“satoru.” 

“yes, we can.” it’s more adamant this time. 

“the problems from before still stand. this-this is almost like a honeymoon period where we don’t have to address that. it…it won’t be like this if we give in.” you state. 

“i am more than happy to cuss out my parents here and there for you. for leo. the only standards he has to live up to ours, that much was apparent from the way we’ve spent the last month. and you’re the woman i’ve always wanted. what’s going to be different if you give in?” 

“leo. they’re going to press-” 

“i’m going to deal with that. they're my beast to handle. do you really think i’d even let them say a word against leo?” 

you frown. 

“no.” you murmur. 

“he’s going to be okay. we’re going to teach him right from wrong, we’re going to help him through whatever it is without pressuring him the same way we did a few weeks ago.” 

you sigh, before giving him a nod. 

“you don’t have to live here to do that, satoru.” 

“i want to live here. with you. you’re my wife. leo’s my son. you’re my family and that’s where i want to be.” 

you look up at him, blue eyes beaming into yours. there’s a twinge of hope in his eyes. 

“what if it crashes and burns like last time?” you ask. 

“all i know is you could either break my heart or bring it back to life. i’m asking you to pick the second one, y/n.” 

you shake your head, before wrapping your arms around his neck, murmuring into the softness of his neck. and you look straight at him, at his pale skin, and really contemplate it. 

and you wonder if he really is right, that this could bring you back to life. 

that just because the previous story ended sadly, doesn’t meant that this one has to as well. that maybe this is what you needed. 

maybe the moment’s just right. 

“the second. i-i want you now. i’m going to need you forever.” you state. 

satoru pulls back, an ear to ear smile when he leans forward – a burning, thrilling, electric kiss being pressed to your lips. 

it’s enough to revive you.

--

the satoru as taylor swift songs series masterlist

taglist: @invisible-mori @porridgesblog  @k0z3me  @kayleegomez  @yihona-san06  @bsenpai  @sweetenertea  @skzismyhome  @mykyoon @violetmatcha @rebeccawinters @luna0713hunter @shotenvinsoot @itzmeme @gojoswifeyyys-world @cutiejg @chilichopsticks @torureadz @dreamxiing @mamamamamarga

[seeingivy]

method acting (completed) ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

actor!eren x actor f!reader

method acting is a very powerful skill. using your own personal, physical, emotional self and pouring it into the character on the screen makes for a powerful performance. except when it's you and eren - you're not sure where the acting starts and real life begins.

read on ao3

the method acting playlist!!

content: actor!au, childhood friends to lovers, enemies to lovers, it was always you trope, fluff, HEAVY ANGST (i'm serious. people were ready to hang me at the stake please be warned), miscommunication (even more sorry), CELEBRITY DRAMA, taylor swift songs and smau at some parts!

triple threat

the ensemble cast

the time of your life

award show etiquette

new year's day

historic wins

the softest kind of love

sick with sadness

the sound of the applause

the met gala

ribbons release

lacy, oh lacy

my love, mine all mine

the third act

it's time to go

funeral

all too well

the new romantics

lovesick

fine line

the beach

speak now

tolerate it

all american bitch

style

better than revenge

sofia

sweet nothing

see you soon

long story short

extra blurbs, after the end of the story!:

narc

extras (method acting fan casts, tracklists etc.):

debut tracklist

lover girl tracklist

ribbons tracklist

the lucky one tracklist

valedictorian tracklist

birds of a feather tracklist

pls comment on this post or any of the chapters if you want to be added to the taglist <3

[seeingivy]

shohei ohtani is pitching tomorrow for the first time as a dodger…in jjk terms gojo has been freed from the prison realm

[seeingivy]

birthmark 

satoru gojo x f!reader 

satoru’s suddenly more appreciative of scars 

content warning: MANGA SPOILERS, canon divergence bc im not gege and they all deserve to be happy, reader described as pregnant, giving birth/c-section, hospitals, pain (kinda), big brother megumi + tsumiki, lil corny family, 

an: happy fathers day to our fav dad :DDD reader is described as having dark hair in comparison to satoru but tbh every hair color is dark compared to white unless you have white hair them im sorry

Keep reading

[seeingivy]

“i wouldn’t do that” “i wouldn’t say that” “i wouldn’t wear that” “i wouldn’t kiss them” too bad you pedantic dorks, you’re not the one in control here.

[seeingivy]

[seeingivy]

ronnie its been FOREVER i hope you remember who i am :,,) i've been reading a looot of your works on my ao3!!! hopefully i can catch up with any fics i missed once my finals r over <3 mwahhhh hope youre doing WELL!!!

hi my sweetie pie!!! of course i remember who you are STOP!!!! im so glad that you've been reading my works (and hopefully) enjoying them. getting to catch up and lowkey rot after finals is the best feeling, i hope you have the best summer!

[seeingivy]

hii!! i haven’t been active on tumblr for months (stupid college) BUT i was wondering if you’re a fan of ashe and finneas bc they’re making a band called the favors and that’s SO eren and y/n from method acting

LISTEN. i'm not necessarily a fan per say (i've actually just never gotten around to listening to their music) which IS crazy because i actually went to billie eilish's last show in LA back in december and finneas was the opener....and he brought out ashe to sing that song that they have together

needless to say that was very method acting AND also they kept showing finneas's girlfriend on the big screen during the show because he kept pointing her out and that was very method acting as well

[seeingivy]

hellooooo!!!! I just saw that you graduated!! congratulations!!!!!! yippee yippee yippee!!!

I just came to say hello and see how you were enjoying the fact that ts has her music back as you are my resident swiftie on this app and then boom find out you graduated which is, imo, ten times cooler so yay!!!

hi hi hi!!!! thank you so so much!!!! ⭐️ it was a very amazing feeling getting to delete canvas off of my phone and not worry about assignments....just to then jump into my job + studying for the biggest exam of my career so far LOL.

all is well!!! the masters news was LITERALLY so crazy to me but also it made so much sense. like every time after the first reputation clowning, i just kind of had a feeling that it wasn't going to come out for a really long time - and was pre-emptively mourning the loss of one of my favorite albums (if she changed anything from new year's day i would have sobbed)

[seeingivy]

i just want u to know you're wonderful and thanks for writing your eren fics!! 🥺💖

thank you thank you thank you! this means the entire world to me <3

[seeingivy]

the alchemy

actor!eren x f!reader

**an extra for my method acting fic

--

“Do you think that Marco has a crush on Amal?” 

When you look over to your left, after finally being able to tear your overly introspective eyes away from where the kids are playing ten feet away in Lana and Sukuna’s drawing room, you find that Eren’s offering you a particularly skeptical glance.

You can tell that there’s a hint of irritation in his eyes – that the thought you’ve posed is so particularly preposterous to him that he can’t even believe that you’ve said it – as you deflate and give him a glare. 

But it’s a thought that’s occupied your mind since the time that you got here, almost six hours ago, when you noticed how they were behaving – how they’ve been behaving. The way that Marco would sit next to her, pay attention a little too attentively, and everything else in between. 

“Don’t look at me like I’m crazy, Eren.” you murmur. 

“Well, don’t say crazy things, then.” Eren states. 

“How is that crazy?” you defend. 

“Well, for starters, they’re five years old. The only thing they care about is what they’re eating for dinner in a few hours. And when we’re going to put Bluey on.” 

You frown. 

“I’m not saying that Marco’s about to propose marriage. Or that he’s like…sincerely in love with her. But…I can just tell, Eren. He likes her more than everyone else. Favors hers whenever he gets an opportunity to. Because he likes her.”  you emphasize. 

“Connie sends Amal her over with gummy worms and chocolate for every playdate. If I were him, I’d like her more than everyone else too.” Eren responds, aggressively yanking the towel on the rack to emphasize his point, before he takes to drying the dishes that you’ve just washed. 

You sigh, as you turn your back towards the group of them, and lean your cheek against Eren’s bicep. He absentmindedly turns to his side to press a swift kiss to the top of your head, before he continues wiping the dishes down. And he takes a beat, almost for a full minute, before he sighs. 

“You really think that he likes her?” 

You smile. You knew that he was going to give in. 

“Yes.” you state. 

Eren shakes his head, almost like he’s giving some quiet consideration to the thought – that Marco really could like her, that it was a sincere possibility – before he turns to you. 

“I mean, you’re obviously not coming up with this out of nowhere. At least I hope you’re not. And it’s very clearly bothering you that I’m not entertaining this conversation, so go ahead and tell me the whole spiel that you prepared.” 

“Really?” 

“I never said that I was going to agree with you. I’m just saying that I know you’re not going to drop it and I want this whole thing to be over when they all leave later.” Eren responds. 

You give him a nod, choosing to ignore almost the entirety of his sentiment, as you move to his side and push up onto the counter. 

“First of all, he can have a crush.” you state. 

“Okay, I’m not negating the fact that he can have a crush. I just don’t think it’s anything you should be working yourself up over. Or that it even means anything.” Eren deadpans. 

You lightly smack him across the shoulder. 

“You’re insane. Our son having a crush on Connie’s daughter isn’t a big deal?” you whisper. 

In reality, it was the biggest deal. The biggest deal because it was something that you sincerely hoped for – a sweet childhood love, for your own kids. The fact that almost all of your kids' peers were the kids of friends of your own – Jean and Mikasa, Connie and Maryam – it was almost the perfect recipe to what you wanted. 

Good families. Real love. 

“It’s not a big deal when they don’t even know how to spell their own names. Or how to spell anything. And he doesn’t even like her.” 

You roll your eyes. 

“First of all, when they all got here today, he waited until Amal got here to start playing the board game. When I asked him why, he said that they wouldn’t stop the board game just for one person and he knew that she would feel left out, so he waited so that it would be two people who weren’t playing and they would have to stop.” 

Eren gives you a fake smile. 

“So he’s an empath. And Maya and Olivia could learn to be a little more inclusive. You should be proud I raised a kid that’s so considerate.” 

“Oh, you raised him all on your own?” you deadpan.

“I mean…” he jokes. 

You smack him with the spare towel. 

“Shut up. Maya’s…inconsiderateness comes from you.” 

“That’s not a word. And I’m just saying, Marco’s just being nice. Like he always is.” 

“Well, he didn’t do that for anyone else. I’ve actually never seen him turn down a game of Candy Land for anything.” 

Eren rolls his eyes. 

“Be serious. Do you remember the meltdown he had when you accidentally cleaned the game he had set up last week?” you add. 

“Yes, but…” 

“And he always asks. He even asked when we walked over here if Amal was going to be coming, because he wanted to play with her.” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“That’s so inconsequential. You can’t be serious.” 

“Why are you so against the idea?” you state. 

Eren sets the plate down before turning to face you and lifting his freezing cold hands to cup your face. His eyes look particularly bright, even in the dim light, and it nearly makes you forget what he’s saying for a split second. 

“Look, it would be really cute. You know, Connie’s daughter, our son. But that’s just the thing. It’s too cute. The thought of the two of them together is too good – especially given how excited that it would make you and Connie – and I don’t want you getting your hopes up. Or Connie for that matter. Especially before they learn their numbers. And how to spell their own names. And what colors are.” 

You sigh. 

“I know. I just am excited. And I just thought it was really sweet, all the stuff that he was doing. You know the gummy worms that she brought? Like the two sided, colored ones? She said that she liked the blue and red ones so he took them all out of his pack and left them for her.” you murmur. 

“And?” 

“And almost all of the ones that he had were blue and red. It was sweet. You know, to give that up when it was his favorite candy and pretend like it wasn’t just so he could have it.” 

Eren smiles, maybe for the first time in the entire conversation. You can’t help but lean back and give him a confused look, one that he clocks almost too quickly – with widened eyes – before he immediately lets go and returns back to wiping the dishes around. 

“What was that?” you ask. 

“What was what?” 

“That. That thing you just did.” 

“I didn’t do anything, sweetheart. Drop it.” Eren responds. 

“You definitely did. You like…smiled. Like you know something. Did Marco say something to you?” 

Eren scoffs. 

“As if that mama’s boy would share something with me that he didn’t tell you.” Eren deadpans. 

The two of you drop the conversation as Teddy strolls into the room from his baseball practice with Grace at his side, the former hanging his baseball bag against the hook, as he gives you a slight wave. Grace is more expressive than Teddy, coming up to at least give you the smallest half hearted hug, before she runs off and joins Olivia, who has been patiently waiting for her arrival, in the main room. 

“How was practice?” you ask. 

“Good. Just sore.” Teddy responds, as he scoots to your side to wash his hands. 

“Did you talk to Sukuna and Lana?” Eren asks. 

Teddy shakes his head, earning him an annoyed look from Eren. 

“I told you to call. You know they do miss you when they go on trips like this?” Eren retorts. 

“Yes, yes, I know, I know.” 

“Leave him alone, Eren. He’ll call when he goes upstairs, right?” you ask. 

Teddy gives you a nod, before making his way over to the fridge. You turn and give Eren a glare, one that he dismisses entirely. He had a penchant for getting on Teddy’s back whenever Lana and Sukuna left for a trip, something that annoyed Teddy more than anything else. 

“What are you guys arguing about?” Teddy asks, as you note the faint streaks of the black paint from his practice melting down his face. 

You reach for one of the clean towels when he retreats back to your side with a sandwich in his hands, before reaching for his cheek and wiping the lines off. You can tell that he’s annoyed by his first attempt since he tries to move away, before giving up entirely and letting you wipe the marks off. 

“We aren’t arguing about anything.” Eren states. 

“We aren’t. He’s just being weird and not telling me something.” you respond. 

“What do you mean?” Teddy asks. 

“I don’t know. We were talking about something and he quite literally froze up, let go of me, and then went back to cleaning off the dishes.” 

Teddy gives you a weird look as you let go of his cheeks, before he pushes up on the counter, and dangles his legs off the end. 

“Hm. What were you guys talking about?” 

“Don’t tell him. You’re going to spread a rumor.” Eren responds. 

“Oh, shut up. He’s not a gossip.” you respond. 

“He isn’t. But his parents are.” 

“His parents are in Switzerland for the next week. I’m sure he’ll forget by tomorrow.” you defend. 

“Yeah, what’s your deal, Eren? Just tell me.” Teddy retorts. 

Eren rolls his eyes, before you turn to Teddy. 

“I think that Marco has a crush on Amal.”

Teddy narrows his eyes at you. 

“That’s it? I could have told you that last week. And my parents said that a month ago, Eren.” 

“What?” Eren asks. 

“They did?” you add. 

Teddy gives you a halfhearted nod, as he reaches for an apple from the basket, and takes a particularly loud bite. 

“Mhm. Do you remember that three legged race thing at Gracie’s sixth birthday? He suddenly didn’t want to play anymore when Amal wanted to partner with James.” 

“Oh my god, do you think she likes James?” you respond. 

“They’re five. And who would like Jean’s kid over Marco? He’s a menace.” Eren deadpans. 

“James is four, Eren. He’s just as cute as Jean, don’t let your guard down.” you retort. 

“Let my guard up for what? You’re acting like we’re playing a football game.....and since when did you think Jean was cute?” 

“Eren. Objectively, he is very good looking. You can’t be serious.” 

“Leaving that aside, they’re five years old.” Eren repeats. 

Teddy rolls his eyes. 

“Okay, you can’t really play an age card, Eren. You’ve been in love with your wife since you were a pre-teen.” 

“Pre-teen is different from toddler.” Eren defends. 

Teddy rolls his eyes. 

“No one is saying he’s going to propose marriage. It’s just a crush. They’re little kids.” Teddy adds. 

“Thank you! This is what I’ve been saying the entire time. Then he just had to start being weird when I brought up the candy thing. Have you noticed that he always gives her his favorite candy and just pretends like he doesn’t like it so he can’t have it?” 

Teddy snorts. 

“Oh, yeah. He may look like Y/N, but that’s your son, alright.” Teddy responds. 

You lean back. 

“What do you mean by that?” you ask. 

“Teddy.” Eren warns. 

“You know. The frosting and cake thing.” Teddy responds. 

“What frosting and cake thing?” you retort, pressing him on. 

It seems that Teddy seems to read the situation too quickly – mainly from the fact that you’re pressing him on and that Eren’s trying to make his best effort to prevent him from doing that – and gives in. 

“You know Eren doesn’t actually like the cake part of cakes? He likes the frosting. He even used to eat it like raw from the can, of those like synthetic ones that you can find at the store.” Teddy responds. 

You scoff. 

“No, he doesn’t. He likes the cake part. That’s why we always share and he eats the cake and I eat the frosting. So we don’t waste it.” 

Teddy smiles. 

“No, he really doesn’t. Ask my mom. He used to eat like an insane amount when he used to live with us, you know, back then.” 

You turn to Eren, whose cheeks are slightly dusted pink. Guilty – like you’ve caught him in the act. 

“And what? You just lie and pretend like you like the cake?” 

Eren shrugs. 

“What do you mean? You’ve been eating it this entire time and just pretending?” you repeat.

“Yeah.” 

“Who does that? I mean, what’s the point?” 

Teddy pushes off the counter, switching the hand the apple is in, to sling his arm around your shoulder. He looks right at you, an almost mischievous grin on his face, as he leans closer. 

“He does it to make you happy. Obviously.” 

You slump your shoulders down. 

“Eren, there’s enough cake to go around.” 

“I like sharing!” he defends. 

“We can share other things. You don’t have to eat cake when you don’t like it.” you defend. 

Teddy shakes his head at your side. 

“You know, being your partner in life is basically his entire shtick. And apparently, it also applies to your choice of dessert. You should be happy you’ve found someone so devoted to your joy, Y/N.” 

You narrow your eyes at Eren, who gives you an incredulous shrug. Teddy gives the two of you one last grin, and a swift kiss to your cheek, before he takes his backpack that he left at the door and treks up the stairs. 

“You know, he’s been giving a lot of attitude lately.” 

“He’s a teenager. That’s his whole shtick lately.” you defend. 

Eren rolls his eyes. 

“Are you really upset about this cake thing?” 

You deflate, before looping your arms around his neck, and looking up at him. You can tell that the motion makes him smile – brightly enough that you can see his dimples – and narrow your eyes at him. 

“You really don’t like cake?” 

“I hate it. Almost every single thing that you’ve ever said about cake is something that I agreed with.” 

“Then don’t eat it!” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Well, I’m used to it now. And we’re not going to back out of sharing cake – which is our shtick – because we’ve been doing it for so long.” 

“That is not our shtick.” 

“So giving up your preferences for someone else is only cute when Marco does it?” Eren asks. 

You roll your eyes. 

“Obviously it’s cute when you do it. You’ve been doing it since…since we were filming and I never even noticed.” 

“That’s kind of the point, sweetheart.” 

You shake your head. 

“Well, I have tons of secret romantic gestures that I do all the time too.” you defend. 

Eren laughs. 

“Are you trying to one up me?” 

“No! I actually do have secret romantic gestures that I do.” 

“No, you don’t.” 

“Yes, I do! How would you know?” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Trust me, I know.” 

“They’re secret. That’s the whole point – that you have no idea that they’re even happening.” 

Eren reaches up, attentively tucking the loose strands of hair behind your ear, before giving your ear a quick pinch. 

“Trust me. There isn’t anything that you can’t keep a secret from me, and I love that about you.” 

You cross your hands over your chest. 

“Yeah. You should be more like me. Keeping secrets is really bad taste. Keeping secrets from your life partner is really bad taste.” you retort, emphasizing every last word. 

Eren gives you a full bodied laugh. 

“Okay, life partner. I can make no promises, but I’ll try.” 

--

ten years later - homecoming night 

The second you unlock the door to the house, Marco all but rustles past Eren on the porch through the door, and bounds up the stairs as quickly as he can.

The resounding sound of his bedroom door slamming shut is heard before you can even turn all the lights to the house or hang the keys back onto their hook, and it sends an unnerving feeling down your spine. 

“I thought he was just being quiet.” you murmur. 

Eren frowns. 

“Me too, sweetheart. Thought he was just tired from all the dancing that he did.” he whispers back. 

The two of you seem to have the same thought, almost instantaneously, as you look over to your left where Maya’s standing, notably and uncharacteristically quiet as she hangs her coat up on the rack.

It seems that she’s picked up on the thought that the two of you have had – that interrogating her is the best way to go – so she opts for an awkward salute and darts away to the kitchen. 

You and Eren spare each other a look, mentally noting that something definitely happened to Marco at the dance and agreeing that she’s keeping whatever it is to herself, before following after her into the kitchen.

She’s fast with it – already yanking the loaf of bread out of the case and reaching for the jar of Nutella – as you take her side and Eren walks away to get her a plate. 

“Hi Miss Maya.” 

“Hi Mom.” she responds, dragging out the syllables. 

“How was the dance?” you ask. 

Maya shrugs. 

“Good. The DJ was kind of bad. Someone spiked the punch. The dance was in an aquarium if you can believe it, so we spent most of the time walking around and looking at everything.” 

Eren brings a plate from the cabinet and sets it down in front of Maya, before quickly wrestling the jar from her and tasking himself with making the sandwich, before gesturing for you to attempt to ask again behind her back.

Eren’s always particularly cautious when it comes to these things – approaching the kids about personal matters because he was always so unsure of what to say. 

“Is there any way we can like…do something to preserve it?” she asks. 

“The corsage?” you ask. 

“Yeah. I just wanted to see if I could keep it. Since it’s the first one I’ve ever gotten and everything.” 

You smile. 

“I can do that. Like a pressed flower thing with the petals if that’s okay? And we can put the ribbon on the wrist in a little glass case with the flowers.” you ask. 

Maya gives you a nod, one that you return, as you set the corsage aside on the table. 

“So. Who gave you that? Must be someone special if you want to keep it.” Eren asks. 

Maya glares at Eren.

“My friends and I all got matching ones. And I just wanted to keep it because it was like…my first dance ever, you know? And I know that it’s special to get to go to one.” Maya states. 

“I’m just teasing, sweet pea. No need to get all upset over it.” Eren states. 

You note that her cheeks glow pink at being caught exaggerating over a simple comment, as you shoot Eren a look to leave her alone, before taking the corsage from her and setting it to the side. 

Eren takes a beat. 

“But why’s it so special, Maya?” 

He clearly didn’t take the hint. She takes a bite of the sandwich before she gives the two of you a halfhearted shrug. 

“I don’t know. You guys never got to go to a school dance together. Or school for that matter.” 

“We went to school, Maya.” Eren deadpans. 

“She means real school. You know, with school dances and prom and homecoming games and stuff. You’re right. It is very special. That was one of the things that I felt like I missed out on the most when I moved back home and had a break from acting, that I didn’t get to do normal things like other people because I picked something else.” you respond. 

You sigh, before pushing the thought away all together.

And abandon all attempts to beat around the bush, only because the thought of Marco sitting alone in his room upset, seems to make your stomach more uncomfortable and unnerved as time goes on.

That and the fact that Eren and Maya could easily argue about the dance for another hour. 

“You seemed like you had fun though, which is good to hear. We can’t really say the same about someone else, can we?” 

Maya frowns. 

“Please don’t ask. I don’t want to talk about it when it’s his thing to tell and…” 

“So something did happen?” Eren asks. 

Maya groans. 

“Dad.” 

“We should know! Just so we can help him out.” Eren responds. 

Maya shakes her head. 

“That’s like sibling code. He said that he didn’t want to talk about it so I don’t want you guys to go up there and start giving him a lecture about how things will work out and love exceeds all boundaries and stuff and that everything is forgivable with time and all that.” 

You and Eren spare each other a wide eyed glance. Only because there’s so much in the statement to unpack that you can’t even pick what it is that you want to respond to first. 

“Just because it was true for us?” you repeat. 

“Forgiveable with time?” Eren defends. 

Maya gives the two of you an exasperated look – like the premise she’s provided the two of you is completely reasonable. 

“We don’t lecture, Maya.” Eren adds. 

“You do. And…and I’m sure Marco gets it and he knows that things can work out, but sometimes they don’t. Especially when the person you like doesn’t like you back and you say some things that aren’t so nice…so just…leave him alone. It’s not something that you guys can understand.” 

You frown. 

“He likes someone?” 

“It’s definitely something that we can understand, Maya.” Eren defends. 

Maya deflates. You elbow Eren in the side – trying to signal that this is not the time for him to be having this conversation or getting offended – before turning back to Maya. You spare her one glance, and just as you expected, she immediately folds and divulges what the two of you have asked of her. 

“It’s Amal. Don’t talk to Uncle Connie about this because we all kind of agreed that the last thing we want you all to do is start fighting with each other.” 

You feel an uncomfortable pit in your stomach. 

“Would anything warrant us fighting with each other?” you ask. 

Maya sighs. 

“Look. Amal said some things to Marco and he said some things back after the fact. She went to the dance with her boyfriend tonight, which…which is why Marco’s upset. He knew that she had one but he didn’t really think that it was that serious, but they seemed like they really liked each other and they were together all night so it obviously made him upset.” 

You can’t help but feel your heart drop in your chest, as you give Maya a quiet nod, and Eren’s particularly silent at your side.

You can barely even process what it was that she said – the fact that your sneaking suspicion that he liked her was correct, that your other suspicion that she liked him back was almost completely wrong – and the single thing that you wanted to protect Marco from was the one thing that happened to him. 

Eren glares. 

“And?” 

“And what?” Maya repeats. 

“What did they say that was so bad?” 

Maya sighs. 

“Don’t say anything. Please.” Maya states. 

“We won’t, Maya.” Eren responds. 

“Amal’s boyfriend basically told Amal beforehand that he’s not really comfortable with how close they are with each other, especially since she told him that she kind of used to like Marco when they were in middle school.” 

“I knew it!” you whisper. 

“That’s not exactly helpful. Keep going.” Eren responds. 

“He asked her to keep her distance. She told him and they just got into a disagreement. Marco was confused why it was such a problem and she…she got so frustrated that she mentioned it was because she used to like him.” Maya offers. 

Maya pauses. 

“He was upset. Reasonably so. Amal told him that if he was ever serious enough to make a move, it wouldn’t be a problem. That he can’t be upset when everything that was happening was because he was to chicken to ever be serious about anything. Then he responded and told her that it wasn’t fair that she expected that of him – that she never even really cared him in the first place if she was able to throw their entire friendship away for something so stupid. That she was just as afraid of him to let anything happen for real.” 

“Oh.” 

“How heated was it?” Eren asks. 

“Pretty bad. I’m pretty sure that they’re not going to talk for a while. And she’ll probably distance from me too. But don’t let it affect you and Uncle Connie. That’s why we weren’t even planning on mentioning it.” 

Eren frowns. 

“You don’t have to sit here managing our feelings. We’re adults. And sure, it might feel like you’ve put us in an awkward position, but you’re all your own people. Don’t ever feel like you can’t come to us for anything.” 

Maya sighs, a breath of relief. 

“You know, you don’t have to stop talking to Amal if you don’t want to. She’s your friend too.” you offer. 

Maya shakes her head. 

“It feels wrong. I just want to be there for Marco, not make anything too awkward for him.” she responds. 

Eren walks up to Maya’s side, before sticking his hands firm on her shoulders, and visibly squeezing hard. 

“It might be hard, but you know he’ll appreciate it later on. That you’re here for him.” 

“It’s not hard at all actually. We’ve been together since the start. Kind of hard to imagine it any other way.” she murmurs. 

Maya gives the two of you a quiet nod, before pressing a kiss to both of your cheeks, and retreating to her own room with the half finished sandwich in your hand. You and Eren turn towards each other, and you can’t help but bury your head into his neck, as you roll over the thoughts in your head. 

That Marco liked Amal. That maybe he never even stopped liking her in the first place – from your first inklings of his interest as a kid – and now she was with someone else. That in some shape or form – his heart was crushed right now. That he could possibly be sitting there biting the words that he said. 

“Is it bad that I want to cry right now? And it didn’t even happen to me?” you murmur. 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Is it bad that I want to assault Amal’s boyfriend?” 

“Yes. He’s fifteen.” 

“Hey. I defended your thing.” 

“Well, I didn’t say that I wanted to assault a child, Eren.” you murmur. 

The two of you quietly laugh, before the heaviness settles back into the air, that it feels particularly thick and you can’t even stomach it, before you pull back to look at him. 

“Don’t worry. This is my territory.” Eren offers. 

“What do you mean?”

“Saying something you don’t mean. When you want to say something else entirely? It has me written all over it.” 

The feeling is so foreign – so foreign that it feels like you can’t even access that part of you anymore – the one that had pain that was associated with Eren at one point. He was so cemented into your life, quite literally in the center of it at this point, that it felt impossible to access that part of your brain, the one that remembered exactly what this feeling felt like. 

“Maya thinks we lecture about love? What exactly did she say again?” he whispers. 

“She said we give lectures about how things always work out and love exceeds all boundaries and stuff just because it was true for us.” you repeat. 

Eren narrows his eyes. 

“That’s so ridiculous.” 

“Imagine saying that to us when we were separated. Or filming together and too uncomfortable to talk to each other. It is true, but it definitely didn’t always feel that way. And I remember, it was particularly annoying when everyone was trying to convince me of the fact when that felt like that was the last thing to be true.” 

You sigh. 

“Maybe we should just go sit there with him. So he knows that he’s not alone.” 

You smile. 

“Yeah. No lecture.” 

The two of you quietly tiptoe back upstairs, offering a quiet knock against his door, before you peek in. Marco has all of his lights shut off, except for the lamp that’s on his bedside table, and his coat is discarded against his bed. 

He clearly didn’t attempt to change into more comfortable clothes, still clad in his button up shirt, as Eren reaches for the coat and puts it in a hanger, and you move around to the side that Marco’s facing.

You note that there’s fresh tear streaks on his cheek, falling horizontally from the way he’s lying down, as you reach forward to wipe the wetness away from his face. 

“Hi Marco. You mind if we join you?” you whisper. 

“I’m not talking about it.” Marco clarifies. 

“That’s fine. We were just going to lie down next to you. That’s all.” 

Marco flits his eyes between the two of you, Eren now standing at your side with his hand on your shoulder, as he gives the two of you a begrudging nod. The two of you give each other a halfhearted smile as he scoots over – Eren taking the left and you taking the right. 

It’s uncomfortable for the three of you to squish together on his bed, especially with how tall Marco’s getting, but you scoot in and intertwine your hand with his. You note that Eren’s pushing the hair away from his face, that he’s attentively focused on fixing it the same way that he does to you, and you absentmindedly squeeze Marco’s hand three times as you eye all of his baseball trophies and medals on the wall. 

Marco eventually returns the gesture and squeezes your hand back – one that luckily he knows the exact meaning of – and it makes your heart clench.

And it takes Marco twenty minutes, twenty minutes before he even divulges anything, and it nearly jolts you when he speaks again.

“I think I love Amal.” 

You pinch your lips together. 

“I know.” you respond. 

“She doesn’t love me back. Or she…she did and doesn’t anymore? I don’t know. She just doesn’t like me anymore.” Marco adds. 

Eren sighs. 

“We know.” 

Marco’s quiet. The two of you are quiet too, only because you don’t know what to say – can’t muster up the right string of words that could even provide the simplest solace. 

“Do you guys know how I realized that I liked her?” Marco whispers. 

The two of you shake your heads. 

“Sometimes, I’d walk into the room. You know, at Uncle Connie’s house, or at Teddy’s engagement party and…and I just found myself looking for her. I’d always walk into the room and look around, like…like frantically trying to find where it was that she was. Wasn’t really comfortable until I knew where she was for sure. It was the only place that I wanted to be. She’d ask me to get a drink or have to get up and leave to say hi to someone and I would just feel it, like in my gut, always aware of where she was and waiting for her to come back. Sometimes it felt like she was the only one there or she…” 

“She was all of the love in the room.” Eren adds. 

You can feel your heart drop in your stomach. 

“Just like you’ve always said. I get it now.” Marco finishes.  

You lean your head against his shoulder. 

“I’m very sorry, Marco. There’s no…nothing we can say to make it better and trust me, that…that kills us that we can’t fix this for you. Especially when we know how bad it hurts.” you murmur. 

Marco gives you one teary eyed laugh. It’s enough to make Eren smile, from what you can see in the dim light, as he returns to raking his fingers through Marco’s hair. 

“You’re funny.”

“What’s funny about that?” you deadpan. 

Marco shakes her head. 

“You don’t have to try to fix this. If anything, I’m sorry if I make things awkward for you and Uncle Connie. But this was going to happen to me at some point.” Marco responds. 

“Don’t worry about Connie.” Eren responds. 

“Yeah, I know, I just mean…” 

“No, really. Don’t worry about him. We’re all going to be just fine.” Eren adds. 

“Plus. What do you mean you knew that would happen to you?” you ask.

Marco shrugs. 

“Heartbreak. It was always going to happen to me. I mean, you guys haven’t really dated people other than each other, not technically anyways, and you guys still had your fair share of it, so…don’t know why I’d be spared from it.” Marco adds. 

You don’t get it. 

“I guess.” 

“I mean what I’m trying to say is that it’s…it’s okay that she doesn’t love me back. It was a long shot anyways.” 

Eren frowns. 

“Who said it was a long shot?” 

Marco shrugs. 

“It just feels that way. I’ve never even liked anyone else or even dated someone or held their hand. The premise of someone even liking me back feels like a long shot…that you can like someone, that they actually like you back, that it would actually work out. I feel like there’s so many factors, so many things that have to go right, for it to even work out in the first place and start dating. Then when you start dating, there’s other things that can go wrong – like someone moves away for college, you start liking someone else, producers think that you two shouldn’t be together for your careers.” 

You and Eren narrow your eyes at him and note the smallest whisper of a smile on his face. 

“You know. That stuff. But I just have to figure out what I’m going to do next, I guess. Especially since, I said some shit things to her.” 

Eren hums in response. 

“I’ve said worse.” 

Marco turns over to you. 

“Think she’ll ever forgive me?” 

You smile. 

“I don’t know. But I don’t think it’s impossible. There was a time when forgiving Eren seemed impossible too.” 

Marco sighs. 

“Even when I told her that I never even loved her in the first place? That it was unfathomable that I ever even felt that way?” 

You pinch your lips into a line. 

“Oh, yeah. We kept going at it for a little bit when Maya walked away.” Marco adds. 

“Time will help. Growing up a little and getting…getting new perspective on it will help both of you too.” Eren asks. 

“Kind of have to talk to her at some point, right? We’re basically family.” 

“You won’t have to see her all the time. We’ll do whatever you’re comfortable with..” Eren responds. 

“There’s other fish in the sea too, you know? You can meet people at other places. You know, when you go play college ball…and then get signed to the major league…and then become a hall of famer.” you joke. 

Marco shakes his head, smiling at how preposterous your comments are – at least to him. 

“You haven’t done anything yet, kid. So much to see and so many more people to meet. There’s still a lot to do.” Eren adds. 

“It’s pretty rare for most people to get it right on their first try.” you offer. 

Marco smiles. 

“You guys just get to be the lucky exception to that.” 

“As long as this doesn’t deter you from ever trying again. To be with someone, to love someone. Just promise us that you won’t ever shut it out if it’s with someone else.” Eren states. 

Marco smiles. 

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.” Marco repeats. 

The two of you smile. 

“It always seems to come back to him, when it comes to me. The other Marco, the one that told the two of you that.” 

You and Eren pause.

“What do you mean?” 

“I don’t know. I just feel like he always comes up, that I know so much about him, that I feel like I knew him. I obviously didn’t, but it just…he’s always brought up. By you guys, or Uncle Jean, and Connie that it’s just…I don’t know.” 

“Well, you never realize how important or impactful someone is until they leave. You don’t even realize how important certain moments are until they pass by and they’re gone.” you respond. 

Eren instinctively reaches for your free hand, across the way. You shoot him a halfhearted smile, and he squeezes your hand hard. 

“That’s not true.” 

“What do you mean?” you ask. 

“I mean, I know it’s true for you. Because you didn’t think that he was going to leave the way that he did. But I can realize the value of certain moments, as they happen you know. I know that in this moment in time that things can really only go up from here, now that this door is closed forever. And I’ll always remember that you guys were here with me, that I wasn’t alone.” Marco responds. 

You and Eren exchange a smile, before offering a breathless laugh. You reach over and flick him on the cheek – that earns you a laugh from Marco – before glaring at him. 

“What’s so funny, asshole? That was so sweet.” you state. 

Eren shrugs. 

“I just can’t believe this is our kid. If it were us, we’d be catastrophizing to the next level.” Eren states. 

“Writing depressing songs. Performing them in front of each other.” you add. 

Marco laughs. 

“That’s true. But you guys still do that, even when things aren’t even that serious. I mean the fact that you’re crawling into my bed with me right now is like…next level dramatic. That’s just how you guys are naturally.” 

Marco takes a beat. 

“And maybe it’s just proof that it won’t be like this forever. I think when it really came down to it, you both held out hope when it really mattered. Even if you didn’t say it out loud.” 

--

ten years later - midseason 

Marco’s able to make his way to the hospital on the sixth day. It’s when Connie’s mellowed out for the most part – certainly less weak from how the infection he had the week prior, the slightest bit more lively – and when the rest of you are able to breathe the smallest sigh of relief. 

He’s able to stomach cracking a few jokes, watch a few baseball games. And the rest of you rinse and repeat the same routine. Make trips back home. Get some sleep in between driving here and back. Before starting it all over again. 

And avoiding, desperately avoiding, thinking about the bombshell that the doctor dropped a few days ago. At least not until he was out of here for good. 

“How was your sleep?” Amal asks. 

Connie shrugs. 

“Worst I’ve ever had. But it’s okay.” 

Amal smiles, reaching forward to intertwine her hands in with his, and lean her head against the railing of the bed. 

“Did the Phillies win?” Connie asks. 

Amal shakes her head. 

“Did Marco start?” 

She shakes her head again. 

Connie turns over to where you and Eren are settled, a thin blanket spread over your legs and the seats so small that you’re both uncomfortably pressed against the wall. Eren’s slumped against you, making a horrible attempt to keep up with the book that you’re reading, as you elbow him in the side. 

“What’s going on? Why aren’t they playing him?” Connie asks. 

You shake your head. 

“He has to take breaks. With pitching and all.” you murmur. 

“He hasn’t pitched in a week. His arm is just fine.” Connie retorts. 

In his first year out of college, nearly three years ago, Marco signed with the Philadelphia Phillies as a free agent. He’s been with the team ever since, renewing his contract each season – and consequently, spending almost the entire year, from February to September, halfway across the country. 

And as a Los Angeles native, it took everything out of Connie to root for another team but he put it all aside as Marco’s biggest fan. Something he took serious pride in, as the first person in earnest to tell him to consider playing baseball for the major leagues in high school. 

Advice he gave him to deal with his fallout with Amal. Devoting himself entirely, to something that was just his.

Baseball.

“I think he’s just taking a break right now, Connie.” 

Connie nearly goes slack jawed. 

“Who takes breaks in the major leagues? Is he injured? Is he going to need another Tommy John surgery?” 

You shut the book, making the gesture abrupt so as to note your exasperation. With the way Connie acted, you’d be convinced he was the coach. 

“He’s okay, Connie. I promise.” Eren offers. 

“Plus, if it was something serious, he’d tell you. Right guys?” Amal offers. 

You and Eren give her an affirmative nod. She shoots the two of you an appreciative smile – since she was always particularly too stressed that Connie worked himself up too much and made himself more tired – before turning back to him. 

You eye your watch. 

“Eren and I are going to go down for some coffee. Want to come with, Amal?” 

“Sure. You’re fine here, Dad?” 

“Maryam’s here. Go ahead.” 

The three of you give Connie a halfhearted wave goodbye, before making your way down the hallway, nearly shuddering from the drafty, cold air outside the room. You’re all particularly silent as you make your way over the the elevator, Eren absentmindedly reaching for your hand to stay standing, and the three of you file into the elevator in a line. 

“Are you excited to surprise your dad?” you ask. 

Amal nearly jumps up at the question, eyes wide, before looking over at you. 

“Yes. Yeah, I…I can’t believe Marco would do something like that. My dad’s going to be so happy.” 

Over the course of the past year, Amal and Marco, albeit very slowly, reconnected. 

Connie, now reaching the end stages of his second successful transplant, was slowly deteriorating. Routine colds became serious infections and it was starting to feel like it did back then. 

Connie was in the hospital more often than he wasn’t. Walking too slow, too tired to talk. Exhausted everytime you saw him. 

And Marco – Marco who adored Connie as a mentor more than anything – couldn’t help but be distracted the more time he spent away. 

The only thing he could do was ask. Again and again – how Connie was doing, if he was able to stay up to watch his game, how he was feeling today, what changed in his treatment plan. And the only person who could coherently answer, who knew the answer as soon as it was relayed to everyone else, was Amal. 

He wasn’t satisfied with the answers you and Eren gave him. He felt better knowing that it was coming from someone who was by his side at all times. 

You had a sneaking suspicion that it had something to do with Amal. Maybe not originally, but it definitely did now. Not that his love for Connie was displaced, but from the conversations you were able to overhear in passing, it sounded more like twelve year old Amal and Marco giggling, than Marco just being plain old concerned. 

And midseason, Marco decided to pivot entirely. Granted, you figured it was a mainly rash decision that came from the news that you received last week – that Connie wouldn’t be able to handle  another transplant – and was moving back home. 

Since he decided that he was going to sign on with another team to be able to spend more time here. It was a rash decision, one that Amal constantly talked about not understanding, and you weren’t exactly sure why it was bothering her so much. Why she was so pressed to know what his thought process was when he did it.  

“It’s been a while since you’ve seen him in person, right?” Eren asks. 

Amal nods. 

“I think Teddy’s anniversary party. Two years ago? He’s always really busy these days.” 

“I mean, the Phillies aren’t even in the same league as any of the teams out here. Has to be something special for him to come out here outside of his routine.” you offer. 

“I know he’s going to be really happy that he’s coming home. He misses you guys. Talks about you all the time.” 

Eren looks over at you, an almost devious look in your eyes. You shoot him a warning glare. 

“How would you know that?” Eren asks. 

Amal’s eyes go wide. 

“What?” 

Eren shrugs. 

“That he misses us?” 

You roll your eyes. Eren was reserved when you brought up the idea when they were five years old – that they could like each other. At twenty-five, it seems that you and Eren had seemed to switch positions entirely. And become an instigator apparently.

But you were just being conservative, that making anything awkward between the two of them would just make things worse at this point. You would also make it a point to argue that Eren was just being overly hopeful. 

“And here I thought he was just calling to check in about Connie.” Eren states. 

You elbow Eren in the side. Amal’s cheeks flush pink. 

“He does! No really, I swear, we spend most of our time talking about him. Other stuff just comes up sometimes. We’re just…catching up after a long time.” Amal offers. 

“Must feel like nothing’s changed, right?” Eren asks. 

Amal smiles. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess it makes me kind of sad we fizzled out afte everything that happened, when it was inconsequential, but I guess there’s no point being upset about it now.” 

“Eren. Leave her alone, please.” you respond. 

Amal shoots you a smile. 

“Okay, fine. But just saying – don’t think it’s as inconsequential as you’re making it out to be.” Eren responds. 

The elevator whirs to a stop, the doors opening up, as the three of you make your way down the hall to the cafeteria, where Marco and Maya were waiting. You shoot Eren a glare at your side, one that he ignores, as you turn around the corner, and spot the two of them sitting by the window. 

You note that Amal tucks her hair behind her ears before walking up, as Eren reaches over and pokes Maya’s cheek to get her attention. She immediately swats him off, annoyed by the gesture, as you turn to give him a big grin. 

“Are you excited to be home, Marco?” you ask. 

Marco responds with a hug, one that’s painful at this point with the amount of time he spends working out, as you attempt to tap out of the hug on his shoulder. He immediately pulls back, shooting you an apologetic look, as you shake your head at him. 

Maya rolls her eyes, before turning over to Amal and giving her a quick hug. It’s at that moment that Marco seems to have realized that Amal’s come down with you and Eren, and gives her an almost ear splitting smile. 

“Is that you, Amo?” 

Amal very excited smile drops into a glare at him. 

“Don’t call me that.” she mumbles. 

“Call you what?” Marco asks, his tone almost sing-song. 

“Amo. We’re not two years old anymore. You’re old enough to pronounce my name.” 

Marco reaches forward, pinching the side of her cheek that she quickly swats off, before giving her a proper laugh. 

“But it’s just so much more fun that way.” Marco retorts. 

You and Eren shoot each other a look – mainly to confirm that the two of you are seeing the same thing – as you step back, looping your arms in with Maya’s. Amal takes the lead, Marco basically clininging to her side, as the three of you step in line behind back to the elevator. 

“So.” you start. 

“What’s the deal with that?” Eren murmurs, quiet enough that only the three of you are able to hear it.

Maya shakes her head and you swear there’s the smallest making of a smile on her face. 

“Don’t ask.” 

“So there is a deal with that? That we shouldn’t be asking about?” you whisper. 

Maya gives you an exasperated sigh. 

“I think they’re just catching up on lost time.” 

You shoot her one last look, before the five of you file down into the elevator this time around, as Marco teeters back and forth on the balls of his feet. A nervous habit – one he’s had since you were a kid. 

“You don’t have any reason to be nervous, Marco.” you state. 

“I’m not. I know I made the right choice.” Marco responds. 

“Why are you rocking back and forth then?” 

Marco shakes his head. 

“Just feels weird to be back. For good, you know?” 

“What do you mean for good?” Amal asks. 

“I signed a six year contract. I’m back home for good. At least for the time being.” Marco states. 

“Oh.” Amal murmurs. 

The elevator dings as it slowly stops and the five of you beeline down the hallway. You absentmindedly reach for Eren’s hand as you turn down the corner and enter the room again, noting that Jean and Mikasa arrived in the time that you spent downstairs. You shoot them a smile in recognition, before leaning against the wall. 

“I’m going to start needing a bigger room if you’re all planning on coming here so often.” Connie jokes. 

“You should start looking into options.” Marco states. 

Connie turns his head to the side, to note exactly who it was that says that, and immediately widens his eyes in shock. Mouth slightly parted and a frown on his face, before he looks around, almost like he’s checking if everyone else can see him too – to confirm, that yes, he really is here. 

Connie’s entirely distracted by the sight of Marco, mainly murmuring under his breath about how much he’s grown – something you entirely can’t believe on your own with the amount of training that he does – as he takes to feeling him up. 

“How’s your arm? You haven’t played in a while.” 

Marco pinches his lips into a smile. 

“Yeah, I’ve just been resting up.” Marco responds. 

“Resting for what?” Connie asks. 

Marco grins, so boyish that you see the four year old still in him. 

“My start as a Los Angeles Dodger.” 

Connie’s face drops into a frown. Connie looks around the room, mainly at the fact that the group of you can’t seem to contain your laughter at how shocked he is – for a second time – as he turns to you and Eren for confirmation. 

“Seriously.”  Eren confirms. 

You reach in your bag for the crumpled up jersey and throw it straight at him. 

“It’ll be official later today.” 

“I haven’t been playing for a few weeks since we were negotiating deals and all that.” Marco adds. 

“You’re switching to Los Angeles? Mid-season?” Connie asks. 

“Figured it was better to be close to home. I can see you more often and Maya when she’s around.” 

Marco takes a beat. 

“And someone has to deal with the crashout that Amo has almost ever week.” 

“Hey!” Amal responds, reaching forward to smack him. 

Connie looks down, before running hand hand over the letters on the jersey. 

“You did this for me?” he murmurs. 

Marco shrugs. 

“It’s no big deal.” 

Connie drops the jersey into his lap. 

“No big deal? You were doing amazing where you were, kid.” 

Marco shrugs. 

“And I’m sure I’ll do great here. Even better, since this is really where I want to be. No distractions, my family to support me. And best of all, I can be here for you. Almost as often as I can afford.” 

Connie frowns. 

“You did this for me?” 

“Sure did. Wouldn’t be anywhere without you guys.” 

Marco pauses and turns to Amal. 

“Every single one of you.” 

Needless to say, you and Eren spend at least two hours trying to deduce what that meant on the drive home. 

--

six months later 

You and Eren make your best attempt to ignore Marco and Amal shouting outside the door. It’s a task that proved to be particularly difficult – not only because they’re super loud, but also because it’s the first time they’ve argued in the six months since Marco’s return.

Of course it happens on the precipice of Connie having another surgery at the end of the week and, of course, right outside of Connie’s hospital room. 

From what you can see through the blinds, they’re both particularly angry, waving their hands around, pinching the bridges of their noses. Marco’s almost red in the face, Amal can barely barely keep eye contact with him, so much so, that it sneds a nervous wave through your stomach. 

“Should we intervene?” you murmur. 

Eren shakes his head. 

“They’re adults. They can handle this on their own.”

“Can they? It’s been twenty minutes of this.” 

“We can’t intervene.” Eren states, through clenched teeth.  

“Maybe they can handle this when he’s not in earshot? And about to wake up?” 

“I can hear them just fine.” Connie murmurs, eyes pinched shut as he stirs in his bed, his body visibly stiff as he moves in his bed. 

“Sorry, Con. Not sure what’s gotten into them.” you offer. 

“What are they arguing about?” Connie asks. 

Maryam shrugs. 

“None of us know. I could sense they’ve been off since the beginning of the week, since you got in here.” Maryam offers. 

“Does it seem serious?” Connie asks. 

You lean back. 

“Not sure. I mean, they haven’t argued since….since they stopped talking, all the way back then. At least to my knowledge.” you respond. 

It’s the first time the four of you address that – that Amal and Marco hadn’t talked for years, because they liked each other. It was an easy topic for the four of you to avoid, mainly in name of keeping the peace, but it always seemed to linger in the air.

Since they spent what felt like the entirety the last ten years refusing to be present, when the other was in attendance. 

Connie deflates, as he gestures for you to get them. You walk over and knock on the window loudly – enough to stop the two of them from arguing and look over – as you gesture for them to walk in.

They shoot each other one last warning glare, before joining you inside, the two of then notably quiet as they lean against the counter pushed against the wall. 

You walk over to the side of the bed and place a hand on Connie’s shoulder, noting that his skin is ice cold when you touch him. 

“How are you feeling though, Connie?” you ask. 

He shoots you a weak smile. 

“I would feel better if I got some more sleep.” Connie murmurs, shooting a warning glance to where Marco and Amal are standing. 

You watch as they both look down at the ground – Marco focusing on his untied laces and Amal nervously fidgeting with their hands – as they refuse to acknowledge what he’s said. 

“Amal. Come here.” Connie murmurs. 

You move out of the way, pushing the empty seat closer to the bed so that she can sit comfortably, as you take the spot that Amal was just occupying, and loop your arm in with Marco’s. 

“What’s your deal, kid?” you murmur. 

Marco shakes his head. 

“It’s nothing.” 

“Doesn’t seem like nothing, Marco.” 

You watch as Amal reaches over, intertwining her own fingers with Connie’s, as she reaches forward and squeezes his shoulder. 

“What are you guys fighting about?” Connie asks. 

“Nothing, Dad.” 

Connie shoots her a glare. 

“I just…I don’t appreciate you guys arguing like that.” 

“Trust me. We don’t have much fun doing it either.” Amal repsponds, sarcastically. 

Marco nearly breaks out into a smile. You note that he makes his best effort not to. 

Connie shakes his head. 

“I just…” 

Connie looks down, as he fidgets with the bracelet that’s hanging from her wrist. 

“I would appreciate it if you didn’t alienate or fight with the people around you. I understand that all of this can be stressful, but you’re going to need these people. Especially him, when he’s been here the entire time.” 

“I know. I know, I just…” 

Connie shakes his head. 

“It makes this easier for me. Knowing that the two of you are fine, that he’s going to be here for you, because it means you won’t be alone when I’m gone.” 

Amal’s face immediately drops. And at your side, Marco seems to tense up. 

“Dad. What are you…”

“We all know I really only have a few weeks left. Realistically. And while I know won’t get to see you finish graduate school or get married or anything…I feel better knowing that you’re surrounded by good people who will take care of you. People who took care of me when I was younger. If I had listened to them, I probably could have had more time with you.” 

You watch as Eren drops his gaze, focused on fidgeting with the bracelet clad around your wrist. 

“Don’t talk like that.” 

“You know it kills me that I won’t ever get to meet the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. At least let me have the solace that I know you’ll be in good company. That people will take care of you.”  

“You can’t be serious. Don’t talk like that.” she repeats.

Connie sighs. 

“It’s time for us to be serious.” 

Amal deflates before she looks back, teary eyed at Marco, who exasperatedly lifts his hands in the air. She closes her eyes, almost in silent recognition, before turning back towards Connie. 

“Dad.” 

Amal sighs. Marco straightens up at your side and pushes off the wall. He places his hand on Amal’s shoulder and squeezes. 

“We’re having a very heated conversation. But that’s just because we’re both very passionate, especially when we’re talking about you. We…are just fine. I’m not going anywhere.”  

Connie shakes his head. 

“It’s not you I’m worried about. It’s her. She has a tendency to alienate people when she shouldn’t. Let people walk away when they shoudn’t have.” Connie states. 

The comment is pointed. Pointed at enough at the one thing no one in the room ever seems to acknowledge. 

“Well, she can try as hard as she wants. I won’t be going anywhere, I swear.” Marco states. 

From where you’re standing, you watch as Marco looks down at Amal, eyes widened, as she vehemently shakes her head. You get a feeling that whatever he just said – whatever the two have been saying for the past few minutes – weren’t responses to Connie, and instead, a continuation of whatever they were doing outside. Just as heated as it was out there, as Connie turns to you and shoots you a confused glare. 

“Do you guys want to share your conversation with the rest of us?” Eren asks. 

“I think that would be very appreciated, wouldn’t it?” Maryam adds. 

Amal shoots Marco one last warning glare, before he takes a deep breath in. 

“Amal and I have been together since the end of last year. Almost eleven months. And she hasn’t wanted to tell any of you…because she’s scared that it’s going to make it real.” 

“What?” you ask. 

“I’m not scared it’s going to make it real. I just don’t want to divert attention away from my dad.” 

“You wouldn’t divert attention away from your dad. If you were listening, you would understand that it would probably make him really happy. And it would probably do you some good to not be living in a lie.” 

Amal shakes her head, almost exasperated. 

“I know it would make him happy. It would make all of them happy! But that’s just the point, we don’t even know where this is going, we can’t just back out of it when we don’t know! It’s not a lie – it’s an obstruction of truth to protect him. ” 

“What do you not know? How can you possibly not know?” Marco asks. 

“What do you mean?” 

“How can you not know where this is going with me? Are you seriously still trying to sort your feelings out?” 

Amal pinches the bridge of her nose. 

“I don’t know where you’re going to be a year from now. That you won’t remember what happened years before and suddenly decide, you’re not about this. If this gets to hard for you.” 

“I’m about this! I’ve always been about this.” Marco defends. 

“Oh yeah? You could easily be spending what’s probably the highest point of your career outside this hospital celebrating. But you’re not. Because of me. You think that won’t catch up to you? You think you won’t resent me for it later? You’re not about this, because you don’t even understand where it’s going to go.” 

Marco shoots her one last glare, before reaching for his bag that’s lying across the counter, and reaches for a small velvet box that’s in the front pocket. He tosses the box over at her, his arms crossed over his chest, as he watches her open it up. You and Eren stand on your tiptoes to get a peek – a peek at a glittering diamond ring set in the box – as he raises his hands in the air. 

“I’ve always been about this. For months. You’re the one chickening out. You’re the one who doesn’t understand me.” Marco responds, before he pushes off the counter, and turns on his heel to exit from the door. 

You watch as Amal catches the box, entirely unphased by the fact that he’s stormed out o fht eroom, because she’s too busy staring down at the box, in what you’re assuming is disbelief. You and Eren shoot each other a look - your heads nearly spinning - before turning back to the group of them. 

“We’ll go after him. I think everyone here should just take a breather.” 

You and Eren – with Maya dragging behind on her heels – basically jog down the hall to catch up to Marco, who exits straight onto the patio of the hospital ward, and leans against the railing. The view below isn’t exactly pretty, a jammed street with loud honks, and the sun so bright that you’re all squinting your eyes. 

The three of you follow his lead, resting your limbs against the railing and resting your chins on top of your hands as you look down, at the people bustling by on the sidewalk. It’s quiet for some time – as you assume the rest of them are wrestling with the same thoughts that you are – except for Marco of course, who breaks the silence. 

“I wanted to tell you.” Marco offers. 

Eren sighs. 

“We can figure that much out, kid.” Eren responds. 

“She just didn’t want to mention it. It never seemed like a good time because we hadn’t seen each other in person for so long and then Uncle Connie was in surgery or it was an away week for me and I just…a lot of time kept passing by and before I knew it, it had been so long.” 

You smile. 

“We’re not upset with you.”  you add.  

“I know. That somehow makes it worse.” 

You turn over to Maya at your side, reaching to fix the flyaway hairs decorating her face behind her ears. 

“Did you know Maya?” you ask. 

She smiles. 

“I figured it out after the first month. Not much he can keep from me.” she murmurs softly. 

Marco presses his lips to the back of his hand. When he talks again, his voice comes out muffled. 

“What do you think I should do, Mom?” 

“You’re asking me?” 

Marco shrugs. 

“Seems like you were always the one who had to take a leap of faith. What do you think I should do?”

You smile. 

“Sleep on it.” 

He narrows his eyes at you. 

“Really? No, you should go for it, if that’s what you really want.” Marco murmurs. 

You all laugh, before you and Eren seem to have the same thought, and lean your heads against his shoulders. 

“If you wanted that advice, you should have asked, Eren.” 

“What do mean?” 

“He was the go-getter. Evne quietly, still doing something that took serious guts. But if you’re sincerely asking me, as someone who has doubts almost all the wya to the end, until it’s spelled out to me in simple letters, you should sleep on it. You don’t know how you’ll feel tomorrow in the morning. 

Eren smiles. 

“She’s right. Thinking about it too fast is never the best decision. I’ve just lucked out and somehow made the right ones, but you should sleep on it. We can all say bye and head home for today.” 

“If you think that’s what best.” 

You look down at the street, where the painter on the corner is painting what you can only assume is an ocean – a vast sea of blue all over the canvas. 

“The only thing I'm shocked about is that you...you were able to buy a ring without even consulting us?" Eren asks.

Marco shrugs.

"I mean, it's kind of like Auntie Lana said. When you know, you know?"

You can tell that Eren's fighting the urge to smile - that the thing, that warmth that's simmering in your chest from the sentiment - must be present in his heart too.

"You're really good at that, you know?" Eren states.

"Good at what."

"Sweet talking your way out of an awkward conversation."

--

The following morning, you can’t help but note how much Marco is fidgeting in the elevator – messing with his cap, cracking his knuckles, teetering back and forth – as you make your way down the hospital ward, back towards Connie’s room. 

None of you had talked since last night. Mostly because Connie barely slept through the night, riddled with stomach pain, and Marco and Amal didn’t get a spare second. Or didn’t spare a second to discuss what had happened. 

“Nervous?” you ask. 

Marco shakes hs head. 

“No. Just hope he’s okay, it didn’t sound great.” 

As you turn around the corner and walk into the room, the four of you abruptly stop in the doorway, taken aback by how particularly crowded it is in the room. Faces you haven’t seen in a while – Levi, Sasha, Lana and Sukuna and Mikasa – and little streamers hanging from the ceiling. The four of you give each other a confused look as you turn over to where Connie’s sitting in the bed, brightly smiling at the four of you. 

“Good morning.” Connie states. 

You set your bag down on the floor, as the four of you sideshuffle into what seems to be the only open spot in the room, and lean against the wall. 

“Morning, Con.” Eren murmurs, cleary barely even registering what’s happening – what he’s said – as he drops his hand and reaches for yours. 

“Did some decorating last night, did you?” you ask. 

“Big occasion today.” Connie states. 

“Is that right?” Maya asks. 

Connie gives her an affirmative nod. 

“So we’re obviously missing something then? If everyone’s down here, and seemingly more in the loop with these godawful streamers, than we are.” Eren asks. 

“Where’s Amal?” Maya asks. 

“Right. She would be down the hall, in the bathroom. You should go join her – Olivia and Gracie are there – and Maryam, who is probably no help with how emotional she can get.” 

“Emotional about what?” you ask. 

“Our daughter’s getting married, of course.” Connie states. 

That’s what gets Marco to break his vow of silence. 

“To who?” Marco asks. 

Jean’s the first one to cross the way, as he puts one arm all the way around his shoulder. 

“You, silly.” 

“What?” Marco asks. 

“Heard there was a ring. And that it was huge. We all want to see it.” Jean states. 

Marco looks like he's running a blank.

"Right. I...I don't exactly have it."

"Because you threw it at her? You threw something at your future wife?" Sukuna asks.

Marco gives him an awkward sheepish smile.

“I mean, we heard it wasn’t exactly a proposal, screaming at each other and all that. But given who your parents are, we would be shocked if there wasn’t an element of dramatics involved in all of this.” Levi offers. 

Eren rolls his eyes. And every sentence that everyone seems to say goes entirely over your head - because you can't possibly fathom what's going on. 

“I brought you a button up shirt. Best I could do on such short notice, when they told me to drive down here and procure a tux.” Levi mutters. 

Marco gives everyone a confused look. 

“Can…can I talk to Amal or something? What the hell is going on? I can’t exactly stomach this when…” 

“Take the shirt. Men’s bathroom is right next to where she is.” Levi states. 

You watch as Marco begrudgingly takes the shirt, before basically sprinting past the window towards where the bathroom is. Jean and Mikasa give you a quick swift hug, the latter wrapping her arm around you as she murmurs under her breath. 

“Trust me, we found out just minutes before you did.” Mikasa states. 

“I’m confused, is what I am.” 

Mikasa shrugs as Levi joins you at your side.  

“From what I understand, Marco and Amal had some argument yesterday? And he threw a ring at her? And then she was shocked, and she felt so horrible, that she arranged some wedding that Connie would be able to see by the end of the week.” Levi states. 

You sigh. 

“I see. I just think that…” 

There’s a warm hand that wraps around your waist. Eren’s sweet smell envelopes your nose as you feel him by your side

“Give me a second, Mikasa, Levi?” Eren asks. 

She gives you a squeeze on the shoulder, as Eren looks down at you, warm hands enveloping your cheeks. You narrow your eyes at him, particularly noting that he’s less shocked – not the slightest bit reserved. 

“You don’t seem very phased.” you murmur. 

“I’m not really sure what’s going on. Nothing to be phased about when I'm confused, sweetheart.” Eren responds back. 

“What’s going on is that my daughter is a coward. And probably too concerned that we're a burden to her, even more so to anyone else. And buying a ring months ago is a big gesture – a huge one that gives her heart consolation that your son really does loves her – and now realizes that she’s probably hurt him in ways she can’t imagine. For a second time.” Maryam states. 

“So…” Eren asks, gesturing for her to continue. 

Connie sighs. 

“If your son is bold enough to buy a ring after a few months of dating, my daughter is bold enough to marry him on the spot. That’s what happening. If he agrees to it, of course.” 

“Oh.” 

“And she wanted to do it right now, today. So that Connie could see it…if…if he doesn't make it to the end of the week.” 

"I see."

“I figure he'll come around. Big gestures seem to do that.” Eren offers. 

You shoot him a glare. 

“Hilarious. You’re just going to let Marco do this? He…” 

He wants to get married. Married right here, in a few minutes, in a disgustingly oversized shirt that Levi’s offered him. 

“He will make the right decision. You and I should just sit here and let him figure it out.” 

"Eren."

Eren shakes his head.

"On my life." he whispers.

"What?"

"Don't protest. Just let it happen."

“You’re sure about this?” you ask. 

“Trust me. Has he ever gone astray?” 

You deflate. 

“No, but…” 

“So let him stick with it. We've stuck with so many things, probably done so many things that look wrong to other people on the outside. Maybe this is what's right for him.” 

Eren shrugs. It’s a good enough answer for you, as you and Eren take your spot in the corner of the wall, as everyone makes small conversation. It feels like an eon passes – an insurmountable amount of time – as you all linger in the room, before the group of them return. 

Marco’s shirt doesn’t exactly fit him right. Definitely too big on him, loose around the arms. Levi definitely overestimated. Amal’s wearing sneakers underneath her dress, you’re assuming because she forgot about the shoes, and the bouquet that was wilting yesterday is in her hands. 

“Hi.” Marco breathes. 

“Hi Marco.” 

Of course Jean is the only one who responds. 

“So I’m getting married. Did…did anyone else figure everything else out?” he states.

There’s an excited giggle that goes around the room, a wolf whistle from Jean, that sends the both of them into a blushing red mess. Gracie and Olivia step up. 

“Clothes were the best that we could do on a short notice. Levi’s technically officiated to marry people, so he’s got that – I mean, you guys can sign real legal documents later this is obviously ceremonial – and you have a ring.” Olivia states. 

“Did anyone bring a ring for me? One that she can put on me?” Marco asks. 

You can’t help but lean back against Eren, as he rests his chin on top of your head, and feel your heart clench. There’s a quiet look around the room, as everyone eyes each other. 

“You can have mine.” Connie offers. 

You all watch as Connie slides the sliver ring off of his finger, before extending it out to Marco in his palm. 

“Great. I’ll give it right back after.” 

Connie shakes his head, his hand intertwined with Maryam’s, as he insists. 

“You can keep it. As your own wedding ring.” 

“You can’t be serious.” Marco states. 

“Dead serious.” he responds. 

You elbow Eren in the side. 

“What?” 

“Offer yours instead. He’s our kid.” you mumble. 

Eren nods quickly, as he sidesteps and gestures for Connie to put his hand down. 

“No, Connie. He can have mine. He’s my son.” 

Connie shakes his head. He reaches for Eren’s arm, his fingers clasped around his forearm, as he narrows his eyes. You swear his eyes are glassed over. 

“You…are hopefully going to need your wedding ring for a long time. A long, long time because you and Y/N are going to live the closest thing to forever. From what I assume is the universe's consolation for spending so much time apart. Mine won’t have much use towards the end of the week and I figured…they would make better use of it. I wouldn’t want you guys to do anything else with my wedding ring when I’m gone.” 

When you look up, there’s wet tears running down Connie’s sallowed cheeks. You’re unable to swallow the lump in your throat, as Eren slides his ring back on his finger, too quiet to respond, as Marco – who is unable to keep it in now too – takes the ring in his palm and twists it around in his fingers. You know for a fact that the date of Connie and Maryam’s wedding are engraved in the lining, along with their initials. 

“You’re missing one.” Sasha states, through her tears.  

“Missing what?” Niccolo asks. 

“Something old is the shirt. It’s Levi’s. Amal’s ring is something new, Marco’s ring is something borrowed. You guys just need something blue.” 

The group of you rummage through your bags and turn out your pockets. Until Maryam yanks something out of the bottom of her bag – the original jersey that Marco gifted Connie when he returned six months ago – that has blue stitching on the letters. 

“You want him to get married in a baseball jersey.” you deadpan. 

You all watch as Marco and Amal turn to each other and grin. 

“I’ll wear it.” Marco murmurs, as Maryam hands the shirt over to him, and you all watch him button it up. 

“That’s…that’s actually kind of perfect.” Amal murmurs. 

“That was the first thing that he did. Came back to LA for Amal.” Maya murmurs. 

And that’s how the rest of it goes – something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue – all wrapped up to represent all of the love, the most that you could fathom you'll ever feel, in the room.

--

an: two days ago was my one year anniversary of finishing method acting! as consolation for how much love you have given this fic, here's an extra! <3

taglist: not quite sure if anyone would want to stay on the taglist for extras. so I did not use it.

[seeingivy]

hi ronnie!!! first of all— how are you?!? i heard abut grad week CONGRATULATIONS OMG!! i’m living life vicariously through you now. I hope your mom and sister are doing ok as well!

overall i just wanted to check in on you— love and miss you dearly!! mwah 💋

HI MY SHAYLA!

thank you so so much! it was way more fun that i anticipated it being - mainly because i very vividly remember my high school graduation sucking - so it was a nice surprise. it is also VERY nice to know i don't have like assignments or classes to wake up for, at least for a little whiie.

my mom's eye chilled out by the time graduation came around and my sister was able to make it! just not walk around too much. i love you and miss you dearly my sweetest!

[seeingivy]

Hi Miss Ronnie 🫶🏻

Checking in. How’s post-grad life treating you so far?

Also- you releasing an extra from Method Acting has left me no choice to re-read the entire series. Goodness I ADORE your writing!

Sending love,

-G x T Anon 🖤🤍

hello my beloved!!!!! 💌

not too bad - i start my research job next week (which is exciting, but also not because mind you this is work i've been doing since i was a freshman in college, but now i get paid for it) and have started studying (albeit slowly) for my godawful mcat.

i'm mostly going to spend my summer working + studying - but have allocated off days on june 1st for the dodgers versus yankees world series rematch (because i've adopted mister sometimes diesignated hitter aaron judge as my shayla bc everyone makes a lot of fun of him) and a dodgers versus padres game on june 11th for my birthday!

ah!!!! you are so so sweet - i spent almost three days writing that (some of that during finals week LOL as stress relief) and it makes me so happy that my little handful of people who always give me love on that story enjoyed it!

i hope you're doing well <3

[seeingivy]

the alchemy

actor!eren x f!reader

**an extra for my method acting fic

--

“Do you think that Marco has a crush on Amal?” 

When you look over to your left, after finally being able to tear your overly introspective eyes away from where the kids are playing ten feet away in Lana and Sukuna’s drawing room, you find that Eren’s offering you a particularly skeptical glance.

You can tell that there’s a hint of irritation in his eyes – that the thought you’ve posed is so particularly preposterous to him that he can’t even believe that you’ve said it – as you deflate and give him a glare. 

But it’s a thought that’s occupied your mind since the time that you got here, almost six hours ago, when you noticed how they were behaving – how they’ve been behaving. The way that Marco would sit next to her, pay attention a little too attentively, and everything else in between. 

“Don’t look at me like I’m crazy, Eren.” you murmur. 

“Well, don’t say crazy things, then.” Eren states. 

“How is that crazy?” you defend. 

“Well, for starters, they’re five years old. The only thing they care about is what they’re eating for dinner in a few hours. And when we’re going to put Bluey on.” 

You frown. 

“I’m not saying that Marco’s about to propose marriage. Or that he’s like…sincerely in love with her. But…I can just tell, Eren. He likes her more than everyone else. Favors hers whenever he gets an opportunity to. Because he likes her.”  you emphasize. 

“Connie sends Amal her over with gummy worms and chocolate for every playdate. If I were him, I’d like her more than everyone else too.” Eren responds, aggressively yanking the towel on the rack to emphasize his point, before he takes to drying the dishes that you’ve just washed. 

You sigh, as you turn your back towards the group of them, and lean your cheek against Eren’s bicep. He absentmindedly turns to his side to press a swift kiss to the top of your head, before he continues wiping the dishes down. And he takes a beat, almost for a full minute, before he sighs. 

“You really think that he likes her?” 

You smile. You knew that he was going to give in. 

“Yes.” you state. 

Eren shakes his head, almost like he’s giving some quiet consideration to the thought – that Marco really could like her, that it was a sincere possibility – before he turns to you. 

“I mean, you’re obviously not coming up with this out of nowhere. At least I hope you’re not. And it’s very clearly bothering you that I’m not entertaining this conversation, so go ahead and tell me the whole spiel that you prepared.” 

“Really?” 

“I never said that I was going to agree with you. I’m just saying that I know you’re not going to drop it and I want this whole thing to be over when they all leave later.” Eren responds. 

You give him a nod, choosing to ignore almost the entirety of his sentiment, as you move to his side and push up onto the counter. 

“First of all, he can have a crush.” you state. 

“Okay, I’m not negating the fact that he can have a crush. I just don’t think it’s anything you should be working yourself up over. Or that it even means anything.” Eren deadpans. 

You lightly smack him across the shoulder. 

“You’re insane. Our son having a crush on Connie’s daughter isn’t a big deal?” you whisper. 

In reality, it was the biggest deal. The biggest deal because it was something that you sincerely hoped for – a sweet childhood love, for your own kids. The fact that almost all of your kids' peers were the kids of friends of your own – Jean and Mikasa, Connie and Maryam – it was almost the perfect recipe to what you wanted. 

Good families. Real love. 

“It’s not a big deal when they don’t even know how to spell their own names. Or how to spell anything. And he doesn’t even like her.” 

You roll your eyes. 

“First of all, when they all got here today, he waited until Amal got here to start playing the board game. When I asked him why, he said that they wouldn’t stop the board game just for one person and he knew that she would feel left out, so he waited so that it would be two people who weren’t playing and they would have to stop.” 

Eren gives you a fake smile. 

“So he’s an empath. And Maya and Olivia could learn to be a little more inclusive. You should be proud I raised a kid that’s so considerate.” 

“Oh, you raised him all on your own?” you deadpan.

“I mean…” he jokes. 

You smack him with the spare towel. 

“Shut up. Maya’s…inconsiderateness comes from you.” 

“That’s not a word. And I’m just saying, Marco’s just being nice. Like he always is.” 

“Well, he didn’t do that for anyone else. I’ve actually never seen him turn down a game of Candy Land for anything.” 

Eren rolls his eyes. 

“Be serious. Do you remember the meltdown he had when you accidentally cleaned the game he had set up last week?” you add. 

“Yes, but…” 

“And he always asks. He even asked when we walked over here if Amal was going to be coming, because he wanted to play with her.” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“That’s so inconsequential. You can’t be serious.” 

“Why are you so against the idea?” you state. 

Eren sets the plate down before turning to face you and lifting his freezing cold hands to cup your face. His eyes look particularly bright, even in the dim light, and it nearly makes you forget what he’s saying for a split second. 

“Look, it would be really cute. You know, Connie’s daughter, our son. But that’s just the thing. It’s too cute. The thought of the two of them together is too good – especially given how excited that it would make you and Connie – and I don’t want you getting your hopes up. Or Connie for that matter. Especially before they learn their numbers. And how to spell their own names. And what colors are.” 

You sigh. 

“I know. I just am excited. And I just thought it was really sweet, all the stuff that he was doing. You know the gummy worms that she brought? Like the two sided, colored ones? She said that she liked the blue and red ones so he took them all out of his pack and left them for her.” you murmur. 

“And?” 

“And almost all of the ones that he had were blue and red. It was sweet. You know, to give that up when it was his favorite candy and pretend like it wasn’t just so he could have it.” 

Eren smiles, maybe for the first time in the entire conversation. You can’t help but lean back and give him a confused look, one that he clocks almost too quickly – with widened eyes – before he immediately lets go and returns back to wiping the dishes around. 

“What was that?” you ask. 

“What was what?” 

“That. That thing you just did.” 

“I didn’t do anything, sweetheart. Drop it.” Eren responds. 

“You definitely did. You like…smiled. Like you know something. Did Marco say something to you?” 

Eren scoffs. 

“As if that mama’s boy would share something with me that he didn’t tell you.” Eren deadpans. 

The two of you drop the conversation as Teddy strolls into the room from his baseball practice with Grace at his side, the former hanging his baseball bag against the hook, as he gives you a slight wave. Grace is more expressive than Teddy, coming up to at least give you the smallest half hearted hug, before she runs off and joins Olivia, who has been patiently waiting for her arrival, in the main room. 

“How was practice?” you ask. 

“Good. Just sore.” Teddy responds, as he scoots to your side to wash his hands. 

“Did you talk to Sukuna and Lana?” Eren asks. 

Teddy shakes his head, earning him an annoyed look from Eren. 

“I told you to call. You know they do miss you when they go on trips like this?” Eren retorts. 

“Yes, yes, I know, I know.” 

“Leave him alone, Eren. He’ll call when he goes upstairs, right?” you ask. 

Teddy gives you a nod, before making his way over to the fridge. You turn and give Eren a glare, one that he dismisses entirely. He had a penchant for getting on Teddy’s back whenever Lana and Sukuna left for a trip, something that annoyed Teddy more than anything else. 

“What are you guys arguing about?” Teddy asks, as you note the faint streaks of the black paint from his practice melting down his face. 

You reach for one of the clean towels when he retreats back to your side with a sandwich in his hands, before reaching for his cheek and wiping the lines off. You can tell that he’s annoyed by his first attempt since he tries to move away, before giving up entirely and letting you wipe the marks off. 

“We aren’t arguing about anything.” Eren states. 

“We aren’t. He’s just being weird and not telling me something.” you respond. 

“What do you mean?” Teddy asks. 

“I don’t know. We were talking about something and he quite literally froze up, let go of me, and then went back to cleaning off the dishes.” 

Teddy gives you a weird look as you let go of his cheeks, before he pushes up on the counter, and dangles his legs off the end. 

“Hm. What were you guys talking about?” 

“Don’t tell him. You’re going to spread a rumor.” Eren responds. 

“Oh, shut up. He’s not a gossip.” you respond. 

“He isn’t. But his parents are.” 

“His parents are in Switzerland for the next week. I’m sure he’ll forget by tomorrow.” you defend. 

“Yeah, what’s your deal, Eren? Just tell me.” Teddy retorts. 

Eren rolls his eyes, before you turn to Teddy. 

“I think that Marco has a crush on Amal.”

Teddy narrows his eyes at you. 

“That’s it? I could have told you that last week. And my parents said that a month ago, Eren.” 

“What?” Eren asks. 

“They did?” you add. 

Teddy gives you a halfhearted nod, as he reaches for an apple from the basket, and takes a particularly loud bite. 

“Mhm. Do you remember that three legged race thing at Gracie’s sixth birthday? He suddenly didn’t want to play anymore when Amal wanted to partner with James.” 

“Oh my god, do you think she likes James?” you respond. 

“They’re five. And who would like Jean’s kid over Marco? He’s a menace.” Eren deadpans. 

“James is four, Eren. He’s just as cute as Jean, don’t let your guard down.” you retort. 

“Let my guard up for what? You’re acting like we’re playing a football game.....and since when did you think Jean was cute?” 

“Eren. Objectively, he is very good looking. You can’t be serious.” 

“Leaving that aside, they’re five years old.” Eren repeats. 

Teddy rolls his eyes. 

“Okay, you can’t really play an age card, Eren. You’ve been in love with your wife since you were a pre-teen.” 

“Pre-teen is different from toddler.” Eren defends. 

Teddy rolls his eyes. 

“No one is saying he’s going to propose marriage. It’s just a crush. They’re little kids.” Teddy adds. 

“Thank you! This is what I’ve been saying the entire time. Then he just had to start being weird when I brought up the candy thing. Have you noticed that he always gives her his favorite candy and just pretends like he doesn’t like it so he can’t have it?” 

Teddy snorts. 

“Oh, yeah. He may look like Y/N, but that’s your son, alright.” Teddy responds. 

You lean back. 

“What do you mean by that?” you ask. 

“Teddy.” Eren warns. 

“You know. The frosting and cake thing.” Teddy responds. 

“What frosting and cake thing?” you retort, pressing him on. 

It seems that Teddy seems to read the situation too quickly – mainly from the fact that you’re pressing him on and that Eren’s trying to make his best effort to prevent him from doing that – and gives in. 

“You know Eren doesn’t actually like the cake part of cakes? He likes the frosting. He even used to eat it like raw from the can, of those like synthetic ones that you can find at the store.” Teddy responds. 

You scoff. 

“No, he doesn’t. He likes the cake part. That’s why we always share and he eats the cake and I eat the frosting. So we don’t waste it.” 

Teddy smiles. 

“No, he really doesn’t. Ask my mom. He used to eat like an insane amount when he used to live with us, you know, back then.” 

You turn to Eren, whose cheeks are slightly dusted pink. Guilty – like you’ve caught him in the act. 

“And what? You just lie and pretend like you like the cake?” 

Eren shrugs. 

“What do you mean? You’ve been eating it this entire time and just pretending?” you repeat.

“Yeah.” 

“Who does that? I mean, what’s the point?” 

Teddy pushes off the counter, switching the hand the apple is in, to sling his arm around your shoulder. He looks right at you, an almost mischievous grin on his face, as he leans closer. 

“He does it to make you happy. Obviously.” 

You slump your shoulders down. 

“Eren, there’s enough cake to go around.” 

“I like sharing!” he defends. 

“We can share other things. You don’t have to eat cake when you don’t like it.” you defend. 

Teddy shakes his head at your side. 

“You know, being your partner in life is basically his entire shtick. And apparently, it also applies to your choice of dessert. You should be happy you’ve found someone so devoted to your joy, Y/N.” 

You narrow your eyes at Eren, who gives you an incredulous shrug. Teddy gives the two of you one last grin, and a swift kiss to your cheek, before he takes his backpack that he left at the door and treks up the stairs. 

“You know, he’s been giving a lot of attitude lately.” 

“He’s a teenager. That’s his whole shtick lately.” you defend. 

Eren rolls his eyes. 

“Are you really upset about this cake thing?” 

You deflate, before looping your arms around his neck, and looking up at him. You can tell that the motion makes him smile – brightly enough that you can see his dimples – and narrow your eyes at him. 

“You really don’t like cake?” 

“I hate it. Almost every single thing that you’ve ever said about cake is something that I agreed with.” 

“Then don’t eat it!” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Well, I’m used to it now. And we’re not going to back out of sharing cake – which is our shtick – because we’ve been doing it for so long.” 

“That is not our shtick.” 

“So giving up your preferences for someone else is only cute when Marco does it?” Eren asks. 

You roll your eyes. 

“Obviously it’s cute when you do it. You’ve been doing it since…since we were filming and I never even noticed.” 

“That’s kind of the point, sweetheart.” 

You shake your head. 

“Well, I have tons of secret romantic gestures that I do all the time too.” you defend. 

Eren laughs. 

“Are you trying to one up me?” 

“No! I actually do have secret romantic gestures that I do.” 

“No, you don’t.” 

“Yes, I do! How would you know?” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Trust me, I know.” 

“They’re secret. That’s the whole point – that you have no idea that they’re even happening.” 

Eren reaches up, attentively tucking the loose strands of hair behind your ear, before giving your ear a quick pinch. 

“Trust me. There isn’t anything that you can’t keep a secret from me, and I love that about you.” 

You cross your hands over your chest. 

“Yeah. You should be more like me. Keeping secrets is really bad taste. Keeping secrets from your life partner is really bad taste.” you retort, emphasizing every last word. 

Eren gives you a full bodied laugh. 

“Okay, life partner. I can make no promises, but I’ll try.” 

--

ten years later - homecoming night 

The second you unlock the door to the house, Marco all but rustles past Eren on the porch through the door, and bounds up the stairs as quickly as he can.

The resounding sound of his bedroom door slamming shut is heard before you can even turn all the lights to the house or hang the keys back onto their hook, and it sends an unnerving feeling down your spine. 

“I thought he was just being quiet.” you murmur. 

Eren frowns. 

“Me too, sweetheart. Thought he was just tired from all the dancing that he did.” he whispers back. 

The two of you seem to have the same thought, almost instantaneously, as you look over to your left where Maya’s standing, notably and uncharacteristically quiet as she hangs her coat up on the rack.

It seems that she’s picked up on the thought that the two of you have had – that interrogating her is the best way to go – so she opts for an awkward salute and darts away to the kitchen. 

You and Eren spare each other a look, mentally noting that something definitely happened to Marco at the dance and agreeing that she’s keeping whatever it is to herself, before following after her into the kitchen.

She’s fast with it – already yanking the loaf of bread out of the case and reaching for the jar of Nutella – as you take her side and Eren walks away to get her a plate. 

“Hi Miss Maya.” 

“Hi Mom.” she responds, dragging out the syllables. 

“How was the dance?” you ask. 

Maya shrugs. 

“Good. The DJ was kind of bad. Someone spiked the punch. The dance was in an aquarium if you can believe it, so we spent most of the time walking around and looking at everything.” 

Eren brings a plate from the cabinet and sets it down in front of Maya, before quickly wrestling the jar from her and tasking himself with making the sandwich, before gesturing for you to attempt to ask again behind her back.

Eren’s always particularly cautious when it comes to these things – approaching the kids about personal matters because he was always so unsure of what to say. 

“Is there any way we can like…do something to preserve it?” she asks. 

“The corsage?” you ask. 

“Yeah. I just wanted to see if I could keep it. Since it’s the first one I’ve ever gotten and everything.” 

You smile. 

“I can do that. Like a pressed flower thing with the petals if that’s okay? And we can put the ribbon on the wrist in a little glass case with the flowers.” you ask. 

Maya gives you a nod, one that you return, as you set the corsage aside on the table. 

“So. Who gave you that? Must be someone special if you want to keep it.” Eren asks. 

Maya glares at Eren.

“My friends and I all got matching ones. And I just wanted to keep it because it was like…my first dance ever, you know? And I know that it’s special to get to go to one.” Maya states. 

“I’m just teasing, sweet pea. No need to get all upset over it.” Eren states. 

You note that her cheeks glow pink at being caught exaggerating over a simple comment, as you shoot Eren a look to leave her alone, before taking the corsage from her and setting it to the side. 

Eren takes a beat. 

“But why’s it so special, Maya?” 

He clearly didn’t take the hint. She takes a bite of the sandwich before she gives the two of you a halfhearted shrug. 

“I don’t know. You guys never got to go to a school dance together. Or school for that matter.” 

“We went to school, Maya.” Eren deadpans. 

“She means real school. You know, with school dances and prom and homecoming games and stuff. You’re right. It is very special. That was one of the things that I felt like I missed out on the most when I moved back home and had a break from acting, that I didn’t get to do normal things like other people because I picked something else.” you respond. 

You sigh, before pushing the thought away all together.

And abandon all attempts to beat around the bush, only because the thought of Marco sitting alone in his room upset, seems to make your stomach more uncomfortable and unnerved as time goes on.

That and the fact that Eren and Maya could easily argue about the dance for another hour. 

“You seemed like you had fun though, which is good to hear. We can’t really say the same about someone else, can we?” 

Maya frowns. 

“Please don’t ask. I don’t want to talk about it when it’s his thing to tell and…” 

“So something did happen?” Eren asks. 

Maya groans. 

“Dad.” 

“We should know! Just so we can help him out.” Eren responds. 

Maya shakes her head. 

“That’s like sibling code. He said that he didn’t want to talk about it so I don’t want you guys to go up there and start giving him a lecture about how things will work out and love exceeds all boundaries and stuff and that everything is forgivable with time and all that.” 

You and Eren spare each other a wide eyed glance. Only because there’s so much in the statement to unpack that you can’t even pick what it is that you want to respond to first. 

“Just because it was true for us?” you repeat. 

“Forgiveable with time?” Eren defends. 

Maya gives the two of you an exasperated look – like the premise she’s provided the two of you is completely reasonable. 

“We don’t lecture, Maya.” Eren adds. 

“You do. And…and I’m sure Marco gets it and he knows that things can work out, but sometimes they don’t. Especially when the person you like doesn’t like you back and you say some things that aren’t so nice…so just…leave him alone. It’s not something that you guys can understand.” 

You frown. 

“He likes someone?” 

“It’s definitely something that we can understand, Maya.” Eren defends. 

Maya deflates. You elbow Eren in the side – trying to signal that this is not the time for him to be having this conversation or getting offended – before turning back to Maya. You spare her one glance, and just as you expected, she immediately folds and divulges what the two of you have asked of her. 

“It’s Amal. Don’t talk to Uncle Connie about this because we all kind of agreed that the last thing we want you all to do is start fighting with each other.” 

You feel an uncomfortable pit in your stomach. 

“Would anything warrant us fighting with each other?” you ask. 

Maya sighs. 

“Look. Amal said some things to Marco and he said some things back after the fact. She went to the dance with her boyfriend tonight, which…which is why Marco’s upset. He knew that she had one but he didn’t really think that it was that serious, but they seemed like they really liked each other and they were together all night so it obviously made him upset.” 

You can’t help but feel your heart drop in your chest, as you give Maya a quiet nod, and Eren’s particularly silent at your side.

You can barely even process what it was that she said – the fact that your sneaking suspicion that he liked her was correct, that your other suspicion that she liked him back was almost completely wrong – and the single thing that you wanted to protect Marco from was the one thing that happened to him. 

Eren glares. 

“And?” 

“And what?” Maya repeats. 

“What did they say that was so bad?” 

Maya sighs. 

“Don’t say anything. Please.” Maya states. 

“We won’t, Maya.” Eren responds. 

“Amal’s boyfriend basically told Amal beforehand that he’s not really comfortable with how close they are with each other, especially since she told him that she kind of used to like Marco when they were in middle school.” 

“I knew it!” you whisper. 

“That’s not exactly helpful. Keep going.” Eren responds. 

“He asked her to keep her distance. She told him and they just got into a disagreement. Marco was confused why it was such a problem and she…she got so frustrated that she mentioned it was because she used to like him.” Maya offers. 

Maya pauses. 

“He was upset. Reasonably so. Amal told him that if he was ever serious enough to make a move, it wouldn’t be a problem. That he can’t be upset when everything that was happening was because he was to chicken to ever be serious about anything. Then he responded and told her that it wasn’t fair that she expected that of him – that she never even really cared him in the first place if she was able to throw their entire friendship away for something so stupid. That she was just as afraid of him to let anything happen for real.” 

“Oh.” 

“How heated was it?” Eren asks. 

“Pretty bad. I’m pretty sure that they’re not going to talk for a while. And she’ll probably distance from me too. But don’t let it affect you and Uncle Connie. That’s why we weren’t even planning on mentioning it.” 

Eren frowns. 

“You don’t have to sit here managing our feelings. We’re adults. And sure, it might feel like you’ve put us in an awkward position, but you’re all your own people. Don’t ever feel like you can’t come to us for anything.” 

Maya sighs, a breath of relief. 

“You know, you don’t have to stop talking to Amal if you don’t want to. She’s your friend too.” you offer. 

Maya shakes her head. 

“It feels wrong. I just want to be there for Marco, not make anything too awkward for him.” she responds. 

Eren walks up to Maya’s side, before sticking his hands firm on her shoulders, and visibly squeezing hard. 

“It might be hard, but you know he’ll appreciate it later on. That you’re here for him.” 

“It’s not hard at all actually. We’ve been together since the start. Kind of hard to imagine it any other way.” she murmurs. 

Maya gives the two of you a quiet nod, before pressing a kiss to both of your cheeks, and retreating to her own room with the half finished sandwich in your hand. You and Eren turn towards each other, and you can’t help but bury your head into his neck, as you roll over the thoughts in your head. 

That Marco liked Amal. That maybe he never even stopped liking her in the first place – from your first inklings of his interest as a kid – and now she was with someone else. That in some shape or form – his heart was crushed right now. That he could possibly be sitting there biting the words that he said. 

“Is it bad that I want to cry right now? And it didn’t even happen to me?” you murmur. 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Is it bad that I want to assault Amal’s boyfriend?” 

“Yes. He’s fifteen.” 

“Hey. I defended your thing.” 

“Well, I didn’t say that I wanted to assault a child, Eren.” you murmur. 

The two of you quietly laugh, before the heaviness settles back into the air, that it feels particularly thick and you can’t even stomach it, before you pull back to look at him. 

“Don’t worry. This is my territory.” Eren offers. 

“What do you mean?”

“Saying something you don’t mean. When you want to say something else entirely? It has me written all over it.” 

The feeling is so foreign – so foreign that it feels like you can’t even access that part of you anymore – the one that had pain that was associated with Eren at one point. He was so cemented into your life, quite literally in the center of it at this point, that it felt impossible to access that part of your brain, the one that remembered exactly what this feeling felt like. 

“Maya thinks we lecture about love? What exactly did she say again?” he whispers. 

“She said we give lectures about how things always work out and love exceeds all boundaries and stuff just because it was true for us.” you repeat. 

Eren narrows his eyes. 

“That’s so ridiculous.” 

“Imagine saying that to us when we were separated. Or filming together and too uncomfortable to talk to each other. It is true, but it definitely didn’t always feel that way. And I remember, it was particularly annoying when everyone was trying to convince me of the fact when that felt like that was the last thing to be true.” 

You sigh. 

“Maybe we should just go sit there with him. So he knows that he’s not alone.” 

You smile. 

“Yeah. No lecture.” 

The two of you quietly tiptoe back upstairs, offering a quiet knock against his door, before you peek in. Marco has all of his lights shut off, except for the lamp that’s on his bedside table, and his coat is discarded against his bed. 

He clearly didn’t attempt to change into more comfortable clothes, still clad in his button up shirt, as Eren reaches for the coat and puts it in a hanger, and you move around to the side that Marco’s facing.

You note that there’s fresh tear streaks on his cheek, falling horizontally from the way he’s lying down, as you reach forward to wipe the wetness away from his face. 

“Hi Marco. You mind if we join you?” you whisper. 

“I’m not talking about it.” Marco clarifies. 

“That’s fine. We were just going to lie down next to you. That’s all.” 

Marco flits his eyes between the two of you, Eren now standing at your side with his hand on your shoulder, as he gives the two of you a begrudging nod. The two of you give each other a halfhearted smile as he scoots over – Eren taking the left and you taking the right. 

It’s uncomfortable for the three of you to squish together on his bed, especially with how tall Marco’s getting, but you scoot in and intertwine your hand with his. You note that Eren’s pushing the hair away from his face, that he’s attentively focused on fixing it the same way that he does to you, and you absentmindedly squeeze Marco’s hand three times as you eye all of his baseball trophies and medals on the wall. 

Marco eventually returns the gesture and squeezes your hand back – one that luckily he knows the exact meaning of – and it makes your heart clench.

And it takes Marco twenty minutes, twenty minutes before he even divulges anything, and it nearly jolts you when he speaks again.

“I think I love Amal.” 

You pinch your lips together. 

“I know.” you respond. 

“She doesn’t love me back. Or she…she did and doesn’t anymore? I don’t know. She just doesn’t like me anymore.” Marco adds. 

Eren sighs. 

“We know.” 

Marco’s quiet. The two of you are quiet too, only because you don’t know what to say – can’t muster up the right string of words that could even provide the simplest solace. 

“Do you guys know how I realized that I liked her?” Marco whispers. 

The two of you shake your heads. 

“Sometimes, I’d walk into the room. You know, at Uncle Connie’s house, or at Teddy’s engagement party and…and I just found myself looking for her. I’d always walk into the room and look around, like…like frantically trying to find where it was that she was. Wasn’t really comfortable until I knew where she was for sure. It was the only place that I wanted to be. She’d ask me to get a drink or have to get up and leave to say hi to someone and I would just feel it, like in my gut, always aware of where she was and waiting for her to come back. Sometimes it felt like she was the only one there or she…” 

“She was all of the love in the room.” Eren adds. 

You can feel your heart drop in your stomach. 

“Just like you’ve always said. I get it now.” Marco finishes.  

You lean your head against his shoulder. 

“I’m very sorry, Marco. There’s no…nothing we can say to make it better and trust me, that…that kills us that we can’t fix this for you. Especially when we know how bad it hurts.” you murmur. 

Marco gives you one teary eyed laugh. It’s enough to make Eren smile, from what you can see in the dim light, as he returns to raking his fingers through Marco’s hair. 

“You’re funny.”

“What’s funny about that?” you deadpan. 

Marco shakes her head. 

“You don’t have to try to fix this. If anything, I’m sorry if I make things awkward for you and Uncle Connie. But this was going to happen to me at some point.” Marco responds. 

“Don’t worry about Connie.” Eren responds. 

“Yeah, I know, I just mean…” 

“No, really. Don’t worry about him. We’re all going to be just fine.” Eren adds. 

“Plus. What do you mean you knew that would happen to you?” you ask.

Marco shrugs. 

“Heartbreak. It was always going to happen to me. I mean, you guys haven’t really dated people other than each other, not technically anyways, and you guys still had your fair share of it, so…don’t know why I’d be spared from it.” Marco adds. 

You don’t get it. 

“I guess.” 

“I mean what I’m trying to say is that it’s…it’s okay that she doesn’t love me back. It was a long shot anyways.” 

Eren frowns. 

“Who said it was a long shot?” 

Marco shrugs. 

“It just feels that way. I’ve never even liked anyone else or even dated someone or held their hand. The premise of someone even liking me back feels like a long shot…that you can like someone, that they actually like you back, that it would actually work out. I feel like there’s so many factors, so many things that have to go right, for it to even work out in the first place and start dating. Then when you start dating, there’s other things that can go wrong – like someone moves away for college, you start liking someone else, producers think that you two shouldn’t be together for your careers.” 

You and Eren narrow your eyes at him and note the smallest whisper of a smile on his face. 

“You know. That stuff. But I just have to figure out what I’m going to do next, I guess. Especially since, I said some shit things to her.” 

Eren hums in response. 

“I’ve said worse.” 

Marco turns over to you. 

“Think she’ll ever forgive me?” 

You smile. 

“I don’t know. But I don’t think it’s impossible. There was a time when forgiving Eren seemed impossible too.” 

Marco sighs. 

“Even when I told her that I never even loved her in the first place? That it was unfathomable that I ever even felt that way?” 

You pinch your lips into a line. 

“Oh, yeah. We kept going at it for a little bit when Maya walked away.” Marco adds. 

“Time will help. Growing up a little and getting…getting new perspective on it will help both of you too.” Eren asks. 

“Kind of have to talk to her at some point, right? We’re basically family.” 

“You won’t have to see her all the time. We’ll do whatever you’re comfortable with..” Eren responds. 

“There’s other fish in the sea too, you know? You can meet people at other places. You know, when you go play college ball…and then get signed to the major league…and then become a hall of famer.” you joke. 

Marco shakes his head, smiling at how preposterous your comments are – at least to him. 

“You haven’t done anything yet, kid. So much to see and so many more people to meet. There’s still a lot to do.” Eren adds. 

“It’s pretty rare for most people to get it right on their first try.” you offer. 

Marco smiles. 

“You guys just get to be the lucky exception to that.” 

“As long as this doesn’t deter you from ever trying again. To be with someone, to love someone. Just promise us that you won’t ever shut it out if it’s with someone else.” Eren states. 

Marco smiles. 

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.” Marco repeats. 

The two of you smile. 

“It always seems to come back to him, when it comes to me. The other Marco, the one that told the two of you that.” 

You and Eren pause.

“What do you mean?” 

“I don’t know. I just feel like he always comes up, that I know so much about him, that I feel like I knew him. I obviously didn’t, but it just…he’s always brought up. By you guys, or Uncle Jean, and Connie that it’s just…I don’t know.” 

“Well, you never realize how important or impactful someone is until they leave. You don’t even realize how important certain moments are until they pass by and they’re gone.” you respond. 

Eren instinctively reaches for your free hand, across the way. You shoot him a halfhearted smile, and he squeezes your hand hard. 

“That’s not true.” 

“What do you mean?” you ask. 

“I mean, I know it’s true for you. Because you didn’t think that he was going to leave the way that he did. But I can realize the value of certain moments, as they happen you know. I know that in this moment in time that things can really only go up from here, now that this door is closed forever. And I’ll always remember that you guys were here with me, that I wasn’t alone.” Marco responds. 

You and Eren exchange a smile, before offering a breathless laugh. You reach over and flick him on the cheek – that earns you a laugh from Marco – before glaring at him. 

“What’s so funny, asshole? That was so sweet.” you state. 

Eren shrugs. 

“I just can’t believe this is our kid. If it were us, we’d be catastrophizing to the next level.” Eren states. 

“Writing depressing songs. Performing them in front of each other.” you add. 

Marco laughs. 

“That’s true. But you guys still do that, even when things aren’t even that serious. I mean the fact that you’re crawling into my bed with me right now is like…next level dramatic. That’s just how you guys are naturally.” 

Marco takes a beat. 

“And maybe it’s just proof that it won’t be like this forever. I think when it really came down to it, you both held out hope when it really mattered. Even if you didn’t say it out loud.” 

--

ten years later - midseason 

Marco’s able to make his way to the hospital on the sixth day. It’s when Connie’s mellowed out for the most part – certainly less weak from how the infection he had the week prior, the slightest bit more lively – and when the rest of you are able to breathe the smallest sigh of relief. 

He’s able to stomach cracking a few jokes, watch a few baseball games. And the rest of you rinse and repeat the same routine. Make trips back home. Get some sleep in between driving here and back. Before starting it all over again. 

And avoiding, desperately avoiding, thinking about the bombshell that the doctor dropped a few days ago. At least not until he was out of here for good. 

“How was your sleep?” Amal asks. 

Connie shrugs. 

“Worst I’ve ever had. But it’s okay.” 

Amal smiles, reaching forward to intertwine her hands in with his, and lean her head against the railing of the bed. 

“Did the Phillies win?” Connie asks. 

Amal shakes her head. 

“Did Marco start?” 

She shakes her head again. 

Connie turns over to where you and Eren are settled, a thin blanket spread over your legs and the seats so small that you’re both uncomfortably pressed against the wall. Eren’s slumped against you, making a horrible attempt to keep up with the book that you’re reading, as you elbow him in the side. 

“What’s going on? Why aren’t they playing him?” Connie asks. 

You shake your head. 

“He has to take breaks. With pitching and all.” you murmur. 

“He hasn’t pitched in a week. His arm is just fine.” Connie retorts. 

In his first year out of college, nearly three years ago, Marco signed with the Philadelphia Phillies as a free agent. He’s been with the team ever since, renewing his contract each season – and consequently, spending almost the entire year, from February to September, halfway across the country. 

And as a Los Angeles native, it took everything out of Connie to root for another team but he put it all aside as Marco’s biggest fan. Something he took serious pride in, as the first person in earnest to tell him to consider playing baseball for the major leagues in high school. 

Advice he gave him to deal with his fallout with Amal. Devoting himself entirely, to something that was just his.

Baseball.

“I think he’s just taking a break right now, Connie.” 

Connie nearly goes slack jawed. 

“Who takes breaks in the major leagues? Is he injured? Is he going to need another Tommy John surgery?” 

You shut the book, making the gesture abrupt so as to note your exasperation. With the way Connie acted, you’d be convinced he was the coach. 

“He’s okay, Connie. I promise.” Eren offers. 

“Plus, if it was something serious, he’d tell you. Right guys?” Amal offers. 

You and Eren give her an affirmative nod. She shoots the two of you an appreciative smile – since she was always particularly too stressed that Connie worked himself up too much and made himself more tired – before turning back to him. 

You eye your watch. 

“Eren and I are going to go down for some coffee. Want to come with, Amal?” 

“Sure. You’re fine here, Dad?” 

“Maryam’s here. Go ahead.” 

The three of you give Connie a halfhearted wave goodbye, before making your way down the hallway, nearly shuddering from the drafty, cold air outside the room. You’re all particularly silent as you make your way over the the elevator, Eren absentmindedly reaching for your hand to stay standing, and the three of you file into the elevator in a line. 

“Are you excited to surprise your dad?” you ask. 

Amal nearly jumps up at the question, eyes wide, before looking over at you. 

“Yes. Yeah, I…I can’t believe Marco would do something like that. My dad’s going to be so happy.” 

Over the course of the past year, Amal and Marco, albeit very slowly, reconnected. 

Connie, now reaching the end stages of his second successful transplant, was slowly deteriorating. Routine colds became serious infections and it was starting to feel like it did back then. 

Connie was in the hospital more often than he wasn’t. Walking too slow, too tired to talk. Exhausted everytime you saw him. 

And Marco – Marco who adored Connie as a mentor more than anything – couldn’t help but be distracted the more time he spent away. 

The only thing he could do was ask. Again and again – how Connie was doing, if he was able to stay up to watch his game, how he was feeling today, what changed in his treatment plan. And the only person who could coherently answer, who knew the answer as soon as it was relayed to everyone else, was Amal. 

He wasn’t satisfied with the answers you and Eren gave him. He felt better knowing that it was coming from someone who was by his side at all times. 

You had a sneaking suspicion that it had something to do with Amal. Maybe not originally, but it definitely did now. Not that his love for Connie was displaced, but from the conversations you were able to overhear in passing, it sounded more like twelve year old Amal and Marco giggling, than Marco just being plain old concerned. 

And midseason, Marco decided to pivot entirely. Granted, you figured it was a mainly rash decision that came from the news that you received last week – that Connie wouldn’t be able to handle  another transplant – and was moving back home. 

Since he decided that he was going to sign on with another team to be able to spend more time here. It was a rash decision, one that Amal constantly talked about not understanding, and you weren’t exactly sure why it was bothering her so much. Why she was so pressed to know what his thought process was when he did it.  

“It’s been a while since you’ve seen him in person, right?” Eren asks. 

Amal nods. 

“I think Teddy’s anniversary party. Two years ago? He’s always really busy these days.” 

“I mean, the Phillies aren’t even in the same league as any of the teams out here. Has to be something special for him to come out here outside of his routine.” you offer. 

“I know he’s going to be really happy that he’s coming home. He misses you guys. Talks about you all the time.” 

Eren looks over at you, an almost devious look in your eyes. You shoot him a warning glare. 

“How would you know that?” Eren asks. 

Amal’s eyes go wide. 

“What?” 

Eren shrugs. 

“That he misses us?” 

You roll your eyes. Eren was reserved when you brought up the idea when they were five years old – that they could like each other. At twenty-five, it seems that you and Eren had seemed to switch positions entirely. And become an instigator apparently.

But you were just being conservative, that making anything awkward between the two of them would just make things worse at this point. You would also make it a point to argue that Eren was just being overly hopeful. 

“And here I thought he was just calling to check in about Connie.” Eren states. 

You elbow Eren in the side. Amal’s cheeks flush pink. 

“He does! No really, I swear, we spend most of our time talking about him. Other stuff just comes up sometimes. We’re just…catching up after a long time.” Amal offers. 

“Must feel like nothing’s changed, right?” Eren asks. 

Amal smiles. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess it makes me kind of sad we fizzled out afte everything that happened, when it was inconsequential, but I guess there’s no point being upset about it now.” 

“Eren. Leave her alone, please.” you respond. 

Amal shoots you a smile. 

“Okay, fine. But just saying – don’t think it’s as inconsequential as you’re making it out to be.” Eren responds. 

The elevator whirs to a stop, the doors opening up, as the three of you make your way down the hall to the cafeteria, where Marco and Maya were waiting. You shoot Eren a glare at your side, one that he ignores, as you turn around the corner, and spot the two of them sitting by the window. 

You note that Amal tucks her hair behind her ears before walking up, as Eren reaches over and pokes Maya’s cheek to get her attention. She immediately swats him off, annoyed by the gesture, as you turn to give him a big grin. 

“Are you excited to be home, Marco?” you ask. 

Marco responds with a hug, one that’s painful at this point with the amount of time he spends working out, as you attempt to tap out of the hug on his shoulder. He immediately pulls back, shooting you an apologetic look, as you shake your head at him. 

Maya rolls her eyes, before turning over to Amal and giving her a quick hug. It’s at that moment that Marco seems to have realized that Amal’s come down with you and Eren, and gives her an almost ear splitting smile. 

“Is that you, Amo?” 

Amal very excited smile drops into a glare at him. 

“Don’t call me that.” she mumbles. 

“Call you what?” Marco asks, his tone almost sing-song. 

“Amo. We’re not two years old anymore. You’re old enough to pronounce my name.” 

Marco reaches forward, pinching the side of her cheek that she quickly swats off, before giving her a proper laugh. 

“But it’s just so much more fun that way.” Marco retorts. 

You and Eren shoot each other a look – mainly to confirm that the two of you are seeing the same thing – as you step back, looping your arms in with Maya’s. Amal takes the lead, Marco basically clininging to her side, as the three of you step in line behind back to the elevator. 

“So.” you start. 

“What’s the deal with that?” Eren murmurs, quiet enough that only the three of you are able to hear it.

Maya shakes her head and you swear there’s the smallest making of a smile on her face. 

“Don’t ask.” 

“So there is a deal with that? That we shouldn’t be asking about?” you whisper. 

Maya gives you an exasperated sigh. 

“I think they’re just catching up on lost time.” 

You shoot her one last look, before the five of you file down into the elevator this time around, as Marco teeters back and forth on the balls of his feet. A nervous habit – one he’s had since you were a kid. 

“You don’t have any reason to be nervous, Marco.” you state. 

“I’m not. I know I made the right choice.” Marco responds. 

“Why are you rocking back and forth then?” 

Marco shakes his head. 

“Just feels weird to be back. For good, you know?” 

“What do you mean for good?” Amal asks. 

“I signed a six year contract. I’m back home for good. At least for the time being.” Marco states. 

“Oh.” Amal murmurs. 

The elevator dings as it slowly stops and the five of you beeline down the hallway. You absentmindedly reach for Eren’s hand as you turn down the corner and enter the room again, noting that Jean and Mikasa arrived in the time that you spent downstairs. You shoot them a smile in recognition, before leaning against the wall. 

“I’m going to start needing a bigger room if you’re all planning on coming here so often.” Connie jokes. 

“You should start looking into options.” Marco states. 

Connie turns his head to the side, to note exactly who it was that says that, and immediately widens his eyes in shock. Mouth slightly parted and a frown on his face, before he looks around, almost like he’s checking if everyone else can see him too – to confirm, that yes, he really is here. 

Connie’s entirely distracted by the sight of Marco, mainly murmuring under his breath about how much he’s grown – something you entirely can’t believe on your own with the amount of training that he does – as he takes to feeling him up. 

“How’s your arm? You haven’t played in a while.” 

Marco pinches his lips into a smile. 

“Yeah, I’ve just been resting up.” Marco responds. 

“Resting for what?” Connie asks. 

Marco grins, so boyish that you see the four year old still in him. 

“My start as a Los Angeles Dodger.” 

Connie’s face drops into a frown. Connie looks around the room, mainly at the fact that the group of you can’t seem to contain your laughter at how shocked he is – for a second time – as he turns to you and Eren for confirmation. 

“Seriously.”  Eren confirms. 

You reach in your bag for the crumpled up jersey and throw it straight at him. 

“It’ll be official later today.” 

“I haven’t been playing for a few weeks since we were negotiating deals and all that.” Marco adds. 

“You’re switching to Los Angeles? Mid-season?” Connie asks. 

“Figured it was better to be close to home. I can see you more often and Maya when she’s around.” 

Marco takes a beat. 

“And someone has to deal with the crashout that Amo has almost ever week.” 

“Hey!” Amal responds, reaching forward to smack him. 

Connie looks down, before running hand hand over the letters on the jersey. 

“You did this for me?” he murmurs. 

Marco shrugs. 

“It’s no big deal.” 

Connie drops the jersey into his lap. 

“No big deal? You were doing amazing where you were, kid.” 

Marco shrugs. 

“And I’m sure I’ll do great here. Even better, since this is really where I want to be. No distractions, my family to support me. And best of all, I can be here for you. Almost as often as I can afford.” 

Connie frowns. 

“You did this for me?” 

“Sure did. Wouldn’t be anywhere without you guys.” 

Marco pauses and turns to Amal. 

“Every single one of you.” 

Needless to say, you and Eren spend at least two hours trying to deduce what that meant on the drive home. 

--

six months later 

You and Eren make your best attempt to ignore Marco and Amal shouting outside the door. It’s a task that proved to be particularly difficult – not only because they’re super loud, but also because it’s the first time they’ve argued in the six months since Marco’s return.

Of course it happens on the precipice of Connie having another surgery at the end of the week and, of course, right outside of Connie’s hospital room. 

From what you can see through the blinds, they’re both particularly angry, waving their hands around, pinching the bridges of their noses. Marco’s almost red in the face, Amal can barely barely keep eye contact with him, so much so, that it sneds a nervous wave through your stomach. 

“Should we intervene?” you murmur. 

Eren shakes his head. 

“They’re adults. They can handle this on their own.”

“Can they? It’s been twenty minutes of this.” 

“We can’t intervene.” Eren states, through clenched teeth.  

“Maybe they can handle this when he’s not in earshot? And about to wake up?” 

“I can hear them just fine.” Connie murmurs, eyes pinched shut as he stirs in his bed, his body visibly stiff as he moves in his bed. 

“Sorry, Con. Not sure what’s gotten into them.” you offer. 

“What are they arguing about?” Connie asks. 

Maryam shrugs. 

“None of us know. I could sense they’ve been off since the beginning of the week, since you got in here.” Maryam offers. 

“Does it seem serious?” Connie asks. 

You lean back. 

“Not sure. I mean, they haven’t argued since….since they stopped talking, all the way back then. At least to my knowledge.” you respond. 

It’s the first time the four of you address that – that Amal and Marco hadn’t talked for years, because they liked each other. It was an easy topic for the four of you to avoid, mainly in name of keeping the peace, but it always seemed to linger in the air.

Since they spent what felt like the entirety the last ten years refusing to be present, when the other was in attendance. 

Connie deflates, as he gestures for you to get them. You walk over and knock on the window loudly – enough to stop the two of them from arguing and look over – as you gesture for them to walk in.

They shoot each other one last warning glare, before joining you inside, the two of then notably quiet as they lean against the counter pushed against the wall. 

You walk over to the side of the bed and place a hand on Connie’s shoulder, noting that his skin is ice cold when you touch him. 

“How are you feeling though, Connie?” you ask. 

He shoots you a weak smile. 

“I would feel better if I got some more sleep.” Connie murmurs, shooting a warning glance to where Marco and Amal are standing. 

You watch as they both look down at the ground – Marco focusing on his untied laces and Amal nervously fidgeting with their hands – as they refuse to acknowledge what he’s said. 

“Amal. Come here.” Connie murmurs. 

You move out of the way, pushing the empty seat closer to the bed so that she can sit comfortably, as you take the spot that Amal was just occupying, and loop your arm in with Marco’s. 

“What’s your deal, kid?” you murmur. 

Marco shakes his head. 

“It’s nothing.” 

“Doesn’t seem like nothing, Marco.” 

You watch as Amal reaches over, intertwining her own fingers with Connie’s, as she reaches forward and squeezes his shoulder. 

“What are you guys fighting about?” Connie asks. 

“Nothing, Dad.” 

Connie shoots her a glare. 

“I just…I don’t appreciate you guys arguing like that.” 

“Trust me. We don’t have much fun doing it either.” Amal repsponds, sarcastically. 

Marco nearly breaks out into a smile. You note that he makes his best effort not to. 

Connie shakes his head. 

“I just…” 

Connie looks down, as he fidgets with the bracelet that’s hanging from her wrist. 

“I would appreciate it if you didn’t alienate or fight with the people around you. I understand that all of this can be stressful, but you’re going to need these people. Especially him, when he’s been here the entire time.” 

“I know. I know, I just…” 

Connie shakes his head. 

“It makes this easier for me. Knowing that the two of you are fine, that he’s going to be here for you, because it means you won’t be alone when I’m gone.” 

Amal’s face immediately drops. And at your side, Marco seems to tense up. 

“Dad. What are you…”

“We all know I really only have a few weeks left. Realistically. And while I know won’t get to see you finish graduate school or get married or anything…I feel better knowing that you’re surrounded by good people who will take care of you. People who took care of me when I was younger. If I had listened to them, I probably could have had more time with you.” 

You watch as Eren drops his gaze, focused on fidgeting with the bracelet clad around your wrist. 

“Don’t talk like that.” 

“You know it kills me that I won’t ever get to meet the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. At least let me have the solace that I know you’ll be in good company. That people will take care of you.”  

“You can’t be serious. Don’t talk like that.” she repeats.

Connie sighs. 

“It’s time for us to be serious.” 

Amal deflates before she looks back, teary eyed at Marco, who exasperatedly lifts his hands in the air. She closes her eyes, almost in silent recognition, before turning back towards Connie. 

“Dad.” 

Amal sighs. Marco straightens up at your side and pushes off the wall. He places his hand on Amal’s shoulder and squeezes. 

“We’re having a very heated conversation. But that’s just because we’re both very passionate, especially when we’re talking about you. We…are just fine. I’m not going anywhere.”  

Connie shakes his head. 

“It’s not you I’m worried about. It’s her. She has a tendency to alienate people when she shouldn’t. Let people walk away when they shoudn’t have.” Connie states. 

The comment is pointed. Pointed at enough at the one thing no one in the room ever seems to acknowledge. 

“Well, she can try as hard as she wants. I won’t be going anywhere, I swear.” Marco states. 

From where you’re standing, you watch as Marco looks down at Amal, eyes widened, as she vehemently shakes her head. You get a feeling that whatever he just said – whatever the two have been saying for the past few minutes – weren’t responses to Connie, and instead, a continuation of whatever they were doing outside. Just as heated as it was out there, as Connie turns to you and shoots you a confused glare. 

“Do you guys want to share your conversation with the rest of us?” Eren asks. 

“I think that would be very appreciated, wouldn’t it?” Maryam adds. 

Amal shoots Marco one last warning glare, before he takes a deep breath in. 

“Amal and I have been together since the end of last year. Almost eleven months. And she hasn’t wanted to tell any of you…because she’s scared that it’s going to make it real.” 

“What?” you ask. 

“I’m not scared it’s going to make it real. I just don’t want to divert attention away from my dad.” 

“You wouldn’t divert attention away from your dad. If you were listening, you would understand that it would probably make him really happy. And it would probably do you some good to not be living in a lie.” 

Amal shakes her head, almost exasperated. 

“I know it would make him happy. It would make all of them happy! But that’s just the point, we don’t even know where this is going, we can’t just back out of it when we don’t know! It’s not a lie – it’s an obstruction of truth to protect him. ” 

“What do you not know? How can you possibly not know?” Marco asks. 

“What do you mean?” 

“How can you not know where this is going with me? Are you seriously still trying to sort your feelings out?” 

Amal pinches the bridge of her nose. 

“I don’t know where you’re going to be a year from now. That you won’t remember what happened years before and suddenly decide, you’re not about this. If this gets to hard for you.” 

“I’m about this! I’ve always been about this.” Marco defends. 

“Oh yeah? You could easily be spending what’s probably the highest point of your career outside this hospital celebrating. But you’re not. Because of me. You think that won’t catch up to you? You think you won’t resent me for it later? You’re not about this, because you don’t even understand where it’s going to go.” 

Marco shoots her one last glare, before reaching for his bag that’s lying across the counter, and reaches for a small velvet box that’s in the front pocket. He tosses the box over at her, his arms crossed over his chest, as he watches her open it up. You and Eren stand on your tiptoes to get a peek – a peek at a glittering diamond ring set in the box – as he raises his hands in the air. 

“I’ve always been about this. For months. You’re the one chickening out. You’re the one who doesn’t understand me.” Marco responds, before he pushes off the counter, and turns on his heel to exit from the door. 

You watch as Amal catches the box, entirely unphased by the fact that he’s stormed out o fht eroom, because she’s too busy staring down at the box, in what you’re assuming is disbelief. You and Eren shoot each other a look - your heads nearly spinning - before turning back to the group of them. 

“We’ll go after him. I think everyone here should just take a breather.” 

You and Eren – with Maya dragging behind on her heels – basically jog down the hall to catch up to Marco, who exits straight onto the patio of the hospital ward, and leans against the railing. The view below isn’t exactly pretty, a jammed street with loud honks, and the sun so bright that you’re all squinting your eyes. 

The three of you follow his lead, resting your limbs against the railing and resting your chins on top of your hands as you look down, at the people bustling by on the sidewalk. It’s quiet for some time – as you assume the rest of them are wrestling with the same thoughts that you are – except for Marco of course, who breaks the silence. 

“I wanted to tell you.” Marco offers. 

Eren sighs. 

“We can figure that much out, kid.” Eren responds. 

“She just didn’t want to mention it. It never seemed like a good time because we hadn’t seen each other in person for so long and then Uncle Connie was in surgery or it was an away week for me and I just…a lot of time kept passing by and before I knew it, it had been so long.” 

You smile. 

“We’re not upset with you.”  you add.  

“I know. That somehow makes it worse.” 

You turn over to Maya at your side, reaching to fix the flyaway hairs decorating her face behind her ears. 

“Did you know Maya?” you ask. 

She smiles. 

“I figured it out after the first month. Not much he can keep from me.” she murmurs softly. 

Marco presses his lips to the back of his hand. When he talks again, his voice comes out muffled. 

“What do you think I should do, Mom?” 

“You’re asking me?” 

Marco shrugs. 

“Seems like you were always the one who had to take a leap of faith. What do you think I should do?”

You smile. 

“Sleep on it.” 

He narrows his eyes at you. 

“Really? No, you should go for it, if that’s what you really want.” Marco murmurs. 

You all laugh, before you and Eren seem to have the same thought, and lean your heads against his shoulders. 

“If you wanted that advice, you should have asked, Eren.” 

“What do mean?” 

“He was the go-getter. Evne quietly, still doing something that took serious guts. But if you’re sincerely asking me, as someone who has doubts almost all the wya to the end, until it’s spelled out to me in simple letters, you should sleep on it. You don’t know how you’ll feel tomorrow in the morning. 

Eren smiles. 

“She’s right. Thinking about it too fast is never the best decision. I’ve just lucked out and somehow made the right ones, but you should sleep on it. We can all say bye and head home for today.” 

“If you think that’s what best.” 

You look down at the street, where the painter on the corner is painting what you can only assume is an ocean – a vast sea of blue all over the canvas. 

“The only thing I'm shocked about is that you...you were able to buy a ring without even consulting us?" Eren asks.

Marco shrugs.

"I mean, it's kind of like Auntie Lana said. When you know, you know?"

You can tell that Eren's fighting the urge to smile - that the thing, that warmth that's simmering in your chest from the sentiment - must be present in his heart too.

"You're really good at that, you know?" Eren states.

"Good at what."

"Sweet talking your way out of an awkward conversation."

--

The following morning, you can’t help but note how much Marco is fidgeting in the elevator – messing with his cap, cracking his knuckles, teetering back and forth – as you make your way down the hospital ward, back towards Connie’s room. 

None of you had talked since last night. Mostly because Connie barely slept through the night, riddled with stomach pain, and Marco and Amal didn’t get a spare second. Or didn’t spare a second to discuss what had happened. 

“Nervous?” you ask. 

Marco shakes hs head. 

“No. Just hope he’s okay, it didn’t sound great.” 

As you turn around the corner and walk into the room, the four of you abruptly stop in the doorway, taken aback by how particularly crowded it is in the room. Faces you haven’t seen in a while – Levi, Sasha, Lana and Sukuna and Mikasa – and little streamers hanging from the ceiling. The four of you give each other a confused look as you turn over to where Connie’s sitting in the bed, brightly smiling at the four of you. 

“Good morning.” Connie states. 

You set your bag down on the floor, as the four of you sideshuffle into what seems to be the only open spot in the room, and lean against the wall. 

“Morning, Con.” Eren murmurs, cleary barely even registering what’s happening – what he’s said – as he drops his hand and reaches for yours. 

“Did some decorating last night, did you?” you ask. 

“Big occasion today.” Connie states. 

“Is that right?” Maya asks. 

Connie gives her an affirmative nod. 

“So we’re obviously missing something then? If everyone’s down here, and seemingly more in the loop with these godawful streamers, than we are.” Eren asks. 

“Where’s Amal?” Maya asks. 

“Right. She would be down the hall, in the bathroom. You should go join her – Olivia and Gracie are there – and Maryam, who is probably no help with how emotional she can get.” 

“Emotional about what?” you ask. 

“Our daughter’s getting married, of course.” Connie states. 

That’s what gets Marco to break his vow of silence. 

“To who?” Marco asks. 

Jean’s the first one to cross the way, as he puts one arm all the way around his shoulder. 

“You, silly.” 

“What?” Marco asks. 

“Heard there was a ring. And that it was huge. We all want to see it.” Jean states. 

Marco looks like he's running a blank.

"Right. I...I don't exactly have it."

"Because you threw it at her? You threw something at your future wife?" Sukuna asks.

Marco gives him an awkward sheepish smile.

“I mean, we heard it wasn’t exactly a proposal, screaming at each other and all that. But given who your parents are, we would be shocked if there wasn’t an element of dramatics involved in all of this.” Levi offers. 

Eren rolls his eyes. And every sentence that everyone seems to say goes entirely over your head - because you can't possibly fathom what's going on. 

“I brought you a button up shirt. Best I could do on such short notice, when they told me to drive down here and procure a tux.” Levi mutters. 

Marco gives everyone a confused look. 

“Can…can I talk to Amal or something? What the hell is going on? I can’t exactly stomach this when…” 

“Take the shirt. Men’s bathroom is right next to where she is.” Levi states. 

You watch as Marco begrudgingly takes the shirt, before basically sprinting past the window towards where the bathroom is. Jean and Mikasa give you a quick swift hug, the latter wrapping her arm around you as she murmurs under her breath. 

“Trust me, we found out just minutes before you did.” Mikasa states. 

“I’m confused, is what I am.” 

Mikasa shrugs as Levi joins you at your side.  

“From what I understand, Marco and Amal had some argument yesterday? And he threw a ring at her? And then she was shocked, and she felt so horrible, that she arranged some wedding that Connie would be able to see by the end of the week.” Levi states. 

You sigh. 

“I see. I just think that…” 

There’s a warm hand that wraps around your waist. Eren’s sweet smell envelopes your nose as you feel him by your side

“Give me a second, Mikasa, Levi?” Eren asks. 

She gives you a squeeze on the shoulder, as Eren looks down at you, warm hands enveloping your cheeks. You narrow your eyes at him, particularly noting that he’s less shocked – not the slightest bit reserved. 

“You don’t seem very phased.” you murmur. 

“I’m not really sure what’s going on. Nothing to be phased about when I'm confused, sweetheart.” Eren responds back. 

“What’s going on is that my daughter is a coward. And probably too concerned that we're a burden to her, even more so to anyone else. And buying a ring months ago is a big gesture – a huge one that gives her heart consolation that your son really does loves her – and now realizes that she’s probably hurt him in ways she can’t imagine. For a second time.” Maryam states. 

“So…” Eren asks, gesturing for her to continue. 

Connie sighs. 

“If your son is bold enough to buy a ring after a few months of dating, my daughter is bold enough to marry him on the spot. That’s what happening. If he agrees to it, of course.” 

“Oh.” 

“And she wanted to do it right now, today. So that Connie could see it…if…if he doesn't make it to the end of the week.” 

"I see."

“I figure he'll come around. Big gestures seem to do that.” Eren offers. 

You shoot him a glare. 

“Hilarious. You’re just going to let Marco do this? He…” 

He wants to get married. Married right here, in a few minutes, in a disgustingly oversized shirt that Levi’s offered him. 

“He will make the right decision. You and I should just sit here and let him figure it out.” 

"Eren."

Eren shakes his head.

"On my life." he whispers.

"What?"

"Don't protest. Just let it happen."

“You’re sure about this?” you ask. 

“Trust me. Has he ever gone astray?” 

You deflate. 

“No, but…” 

“So let him stick with it. We've stuck with so many things, probably done so many things that look wrong to other people on the outside. Maybe this is what's right for him.” 

Eren shrugs. It’s a good enough answer for you, as you and Eren take your spot in the corner of the wall, as everyone makes small conversation. It feels like an eon passes – an insurmountable amount of time – as you all linger in the room, before the group of them return. 

Marco’s shirt doesn’t exactly fit him right. Definitely too big on him, loose around the arms. Levi definitely overestimated. Amal’s wearing sneakers underneath her dress, you’re assuming because she forgot about the shoes, and the bouquet that was wilting yesterday is in her hands. 

“Hi.” Marco breathes. 

“Hi Marco.” 

Of course Jean is the only one who responds. 

“So I’m getting married. Did…did anyone else figure everything else out?” he states.

There’s an excited giggle that goes around the room, a wolf whistle from Jean, that sends the both of them into a blushing red mess. Gracie and Olivia step up. 

“Clothes were the best that we could do on a short notice. Levi’s technically officiated to marry people, so he’s got that – I mean, you guys can sign real legal documents later this is obviously ceremonial – and you have a ring.” Olivia states. 

“Did anyone bring a ring for me? One that she can put on me?” Marco asks. 

You can’t help but lean back against Eren, as he rests his chin on top of your head, and feel your heart clench. There’s a quiet look around the room, as everyone eyes each other. 

“You can have mine.” Connie offers. 

You all watch as Connie slides the sliver ring off of his finger, before extending it out to Marco in his palm. 

“Great. I’ll give it right back after.” 

Connie shakes his head, his hand intertwined with Maryam’s, as he insists. 

“You can keep it. As your own wedding ring.” 

“You can’t be serious.” Marco states. 

“Dead serious.” he responds. 

You elbow Eren in the side. 

“What?” 

“Offer yours instead. He’s our kid.” you mumble. 

Eren nods quickly, as he sidesteps and gestures for Connie to put his hand down. 

“No, Connie. He can have mine. He’s my son.” 

Connie shakes his head. He reaches for Eren’s arm, his fingers clasped around his forearm, as he narrows his eyes. You swear his eyes are glassed over. 

“You…are hopefully going to need your wedding ring for a long time. A long, long time because you and Y/N are going to live the closest thing to forever. From what I assume is the universe's consolation for spending so much time apart. Mine won’t have much use towards the end of the week and I figured…they would make better use of it. I wouldn’t want you guys to do anything else with my wedding ring when I’m gone.” 

When you look up, there’s wet tears running down Connie’s sallowed cheeks. You’re unable to swallow the lump in your throat, as Eren slides his ring back on his finger, too quiet to respond, as Marco – who is unable to keep it in now too – takes the ring in his palm and twists it around in his fingers. You know for a fact that the date of Connie and Maryam’s wedding are engraved in the lining, along with their initials. 

“You’re missing one.” Sasha states, through her tears.  

“Missing what?” Niccolo asks. 

“Something old is the shirt. It’s Levi’s. Amal’s ring is something new, Marco’s ring is something borrowed. You guys just need something blue.” 

The group of you rummage through your bags and turn out your pockets. Until Maryam yanks something out of the bottom of her bag – the original jersey that Marco gifted Connie when he returned six months ago – that has blue stitching on the letters. 

“You want him to get married in a baseball jersey.” you deadpan. 

You all watch as Marco and Amal turn to each other and grin. 

“I’ll wear it.” Marco murmurs, as Maryam hands the shirt over to him, and you all watch him button it up. 

“That’s…that’s actually kind of perfect.” Amal murmurs. 

“That was the first thing that he did. Came back to LA for Amal.” Maya murmurs. 

And that’s how the rest of it goes – something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue – all wrapped up to represent all of the love, the most that you could fathom you'll ever feel, in the room.

--

an: two days ago was my one year anniversary of finishing method acting! as consolation for how much love you have given this fic, here's an extra! <3

taglist: not quite sure if anyone would want to stay on the taglist for extras. so I did not use it.

[seeingivy]

the alchemy

actor!eren x f!reader

**an extra for my method acting fic

--

“Do you think that Marco has a crush on Amal?” 

When you look over to your left, after finally being able to tear your overly introspective eyes away from where the kids are playing ten feet away in Lana and Sukuna’s drawing room, you find that Eren’s offering you a particularly skeptical glance.

You can tell that there’s a hint of irritation in his eyes – that the thought you’ve posed is so particularly preposterous to him that he can’t even believe that you’ve said it – as you deflate and give him a glare. 

But it’s a thought that’s occupied your mind since the time that you got here, almost six hours ago, when you noticed how they were behaving – how they’ve been behaving. The way that Marco would sit next to her, pay attention a little too attentively, and everything else in between. 

“Don’t look at me like I’m crazy, Eren.” you murmur. 

“Well, don’t say crazy things, then.” Eren states. 

“How is that crazy?” you defend. 

“Well, for starters, they’re five years old. The only thing they care about is what they’re eating for dinner in a few hours. And when we’re going to put Bluey on.” 

You frown. 

“I’m not saying that Marco’s about to propose marriage. Or that he’s like…sincerely in love with her. But…I can just tell, Eren. He likes her more than everyone else. Favors hers whenever he gets an opportunity to. Because he likes her.”  you emphasize. 

“Connie sends Amal her over with gummy worms and chocolate for every playdate. If I were him, I’d like her more than everyone else too.” Eren responds, aggressively yanking the towel on the rack to emphasize his point, before he takes to drying the dishes that you’ve just washed. 

You sigh, as you turn your back towards the group of them, and lean your cheek against Eren’s bicep. He absentmindedly turns to his side to press a swift kiss to the top of your head, before he continues wiping the dishes down. And he takes a beat, almost for a full minute, before he sighs. 

“You really think that he likes her?” 

You smile. You knew that he was going to give in. 

“Yes.” you state. 

Eren shakes his head, almost like he’s giving some quiet consideration to the thought – that Marco really could like her, that it was a sincere possibility – before he turns to you. 

“I mean, you’re obviously not coming up with this out of nowhere. At least I hope you’re not. And it’s very clearly bothering you that I’m not entertaining this conversation, so go ahead and tell me the whole spiel that you prepared.” 

“Really?” 

“I never said that I was going to agree with you. I’m just saying that I know you’re not going to drop it and I want this whole thing to be over when they all leave later.” Eren responds. 

You give him a nod, choosing to ignore almost the entirety of his sentiment, as you move to his side and push up onto the counter. 

“First of all, he can have a crush.” you state. 

“Okay, I’m not negating the fact that he can have a crush. I just don’t think it’s anything you should be working yourself up over. Or that it even means anything.” Eren deadpans. 

You lightly smack him across the shoulder. 

“You’re insane. Our son having a crush on Connie’s daughter isn’t a big deal?” you whisper. 

In reality, it was the biggest deal. The biggest deal because it was something that you sincerely hoped for – a sweet childhood love, for your own kids. The fact that almost all of your kids' peers were the kids of friends of your own – Jean and Mikasa, Connie and Maryam – it was almost the perfect recipe to what you wanted. 

Good families. Real love. 

“It’s not a big deal when they don’t even know how to spell their own names. Or how to spell anything. And he doesn’t even like her.” 

You roll your eyes. 

“First of all, when they all got here today, he waited until Amal got here to start playing the board game. When I asked him why, he said that they wouldn’t stop the board game just for one person and he knew that she would feel left out, so he waited so that it would be two people who weren’t playing and they would have to stop.” 

Eren gives you a fake smile. 

“So he’s an empath. And Maya and Olivia could learn to be a little more inclusive. You should be proud I raised a kid that’s so considerate.” 

“Oh, you raised him all on your own?” you deadpan.

“I mean…” he jokes. 

You smack him with the spare towel. 

“Shut up. Maya’s…inconsiderateness comes from you.” 

“That’s not a word. And I’m just saying, Marco’s just being nice. Like he always is.” 

“Well, he didn’t do that for anyone else. I’ve actually never seen him turn down a game of Candy Land for anything.” 

Eren rolls his eyes. 

“Be serious. Do you remember the meltdown he had when you accidentally cleaned the game he had set up last week?” you add. 

“Yes, but…” 

“And he always asks. He even asked when we walked over here if Amal was going to be coming, because he wanted to play with her.” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“That’s so inconsequential. You can’t be serious.” 

“Why are you so against the idea?” you state. 

Eren sets the plate down before turning to face you and lifting his freezing cold hands to cup your face. His eyes look particularly bright, even in the dim light, and it nearly makes you forget what he’s saying for a split second. 

“Look, it would be really cute. You know, Connie’s daughter, our son. But that’s just the thing. It’s too cute. The thought of the two of them together is too good – especially given how excited that it would make you and Connie – and I don’t want you getting your hopes up. Or Connie for that matter. Especially before they learn their numbers. And how to spell their own names. And what colors are.” 

You sigh. 

“I know. I just am excited. And I just thought it was really sweet, all the stuff that he was doing. You know the gummy worms that she brought? Like the two sided, colored ones? She said that she liked the blue and red ones so he took them all out of his pack and left them for her.” you murmur. 

“And?” 

“And almost all of the ones that he had were blue and red. It was sweet. You know, to give that up when it was his favorite candy and pretend like it wasn’t just so he could have it.” 

Eren smiles, maybe for the first time in the entire conversation. You can’t help but lean back and give him a confused look, one that he clocks almost too quickly – with widened eyes – before he immediately lets go and returns back to wiping the dishes around. 

“What was that?” you ask. 

“What was what?” 

“That. That thing you just did.” 

“I didn’t do anything, sweetheart. Drop it.” Eren responds. 

“You definitely did. You like…smiled. Like you know something. Did Marco say something to you?” 

Eren scoffs. 

“As if that mama’s boy would share something with me that he didn’t tell you.” Eren deadpans. 

The two of you drop the conversation as Teddy strolls into the room from his baseball practice with Grace at his side, the former hanging his baseball bag against the hook, as he gives you a slight wave. Grace is more expressive than Teddy, coming up to at least give you the smallest half hearted hug, before she runs off and joins Olivia, who has been patiently waiting for her arrival, in the main room. 

“How was practice?” you ask. 

“Good. Just sore.” Teddy responds, as he scoots to your side to wash his hands. 

“Did you talk to Sukuna and Lana?” Eren asks. 

Teddy shakes his head, earning him an annoyed look from Eren. 

“I told you to call. You know they do miss you when they go on trips like this?” Eren retorts. 

“Yes, yes, I know, I know.” 

“Leave him alone, Eren. He’ll call when he goes upstairs, right?” you ask. 

Teddy gives you a nod, before making his way over to the fridge. You turn and give Eren a glare, one that he dismisses entirely. He had a penchant for getting on Teddy’s back whenever Lana and Sukuna left for a trip, something that annoyed Teddy more than anything else. 

“What are you guys arguing about?” Teddy asks, as you note the faint streaks of the black paint from his practice melting down his face. 

You reach for one of the clean towels when he retreats back to your side with a sandwich in his hands, before reaching for his cheek and wiping the lines off. You can tell that he’s annoyed by his first attempt since he tries to move away, before giving up entirely and letting you wipe the marks off. 

“We aren’t arguing about anything.” Eren states. 

“We aren’t. He’s just being weird and not telling me something.” you respond. 

“What do you mean?” Teddy asks. 

“I don’t know. We were talking about something and he quite literally froze up, let go of me, and then went back to cleaning off the dishes.” 

Teddy gives you a weird look as you let go of his cheeks, before he pushes up on the counter, and dangles his legs off the end. 

“Hm. What were you guys talking about?” 

“Don’t tell him. You’re going to spread a rumor.” Eren responds. 

“Oh, shut up. He’s not a gossip.” you respond. 

“He isn’t. But his parents are.” 

“His parents are in Switzerland for the next week. I’m sure he’ll forget by tomorrow.” you defend. 

“Yeah, what’s your deal, Eren? Just tell me.” Teddy retorts. 

Eren rolls his eyes, before you turn to Teddy. 

“I think that Marco has a crush on Amal.”

Teddy narrows his eyes at you. 

“That’s it? I could have told you that last week. And my parents said that a month ago, Eren.” 

“What?” Eren asks. 

“They did?” you add. 

Teddy gives you a halfhearted nod, as he reaches for an apple from the basket, and takes a particularly loud bite. 

“Mhm. Do you remember that three legged race thing at Gracie’s sixth birthday? He suddenly didn’t want to play anymore when Amal wanted to partner with James.” 

“Oh my god, do you think she likes James?” you respond. 

“They’re five. And who would like Jean’s kid over Marco? He’s a menace.” Eren deadpans. 

“James is four, Eren. He’s just as cute as Jean, don’t let your guard down.” you retort. 

“Let my guard up for what? You’re acting like we’re playing a football game.....and since when did you think Jean was cute?” 

“Eren. Objectively, he is very good looking. You can’t be serious.” 

“Leaving that aside, they’re five years old.” Eren repeats. 

Teddy rolls his eyes. 

“Okay, you can’t really play an age card, Eren. You’ve been in love with your wife since you were a pre-teen.” 

“Pre-teen is different from toddler.” Eren defends. 

Teddy rolls his eyes. 

“No one is saying he’s going to propose marriage. It’s just a crush. They’re little kids.” Teddy adds. 

“Thank you! This is what I’ve been saying the entire time. Then he just had to start being weird when I brought up the candy thing. Have you noticed that he always gives her his favorite candy and just pretends like he doesn’t like it so he can’t have it?” 

Teddy snorts. 

“Oh, yeah. He may look like Y/N, but that’s your son, alright.” Teddy responds. 

You lean back. 

“What do you mean by that?” you ask. 

“Teddy.” Eren warns. 

“You know. The frosting and cake thing.” Teddy responds. 

“What frosting and cake thing?” you retort, pressing him on. 

It seems that Teddy seems to read the situation too quickly – mainly from the fact that you’re pressing him on and that Eren’s trying to make his best effort to prevent him from doing that – and gives in. 

“You know Eren doesn’t actually like the cake part of cakes? He likes the frosting. He even used to eat it like raw from the can, of those like synthetic ones that you can find at the store.” Teddy responds. 

You scoff. 

“No, he doesn’t. He likes the cake part. That’s why we always share and he eats the cake and I eat the frosting. So we don’t waste it.” 

Teddy smiles. 

“No, he really doesn’t. Ask my mom. He used to eat like an insane amount when he used to live with us, you know, back then.” 

You turn to Eren, whose cheeks are slightly dusted pink. Guilty – like you’ve caught him in the act. 

“And what? You just lie and pretend like you like the cake?” 

Eren shrugs. 

“What do you mean? You’ve been eating it this entire time and just pretending?” you repeat.

“Yeah.” 

“Who does that? I mean, what’s the point?” 

Teddy pushes off the counter, switching the hand the apple is in, to sling his arm around your shoulder. He looks right at you, an almost mischievous grin on his face, as he leans closer. 

“He does it to make you happy. Obviously.” 

You slump your shoulders down. 

“Eren, there’s enough cake to go around.” 

“I like sharing!” he defends. 

“We can share other things. You don’t have to eat cake when you don’t like it.” you defend. 

Teddy shakes his head at your side. 

“You know, being your partner in life is basically his entire shtick. And apparently, it also applies to your choice of dessert. You should be happy you’ve found someone so devoted to your joy, Y/N.” 

You narrow your eyes at Eren, who gives you an incredulous shrug. Teddy gives the two of you one last grin, and a swift kiss to your cheek, before he takes his backpack that he left at the door and treks up the stairs. 

“You know, he’s been giving a lot of attitude lately.” 

“He’s a teenager. That’s his whole shtick lately.” you defend. 

Eren rolls his eyes. 

“Are you really upset about this cake thing?” 

You deflate, before looping your arms around his neck, and looking up at him. You can tell that the motion makes him smile – brightly enough that you can see his dimples – and narrow your eyes at him. 

“You really don’t like cake?” 

“I hate it. Almost every single thing that you’ve ever said about cake is something that I agreed with.” 

“Then don’t eat it!” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Well, I’m used to it now. And we’re not going to back out of sharing cake – which is our shtick – because we’ve been doing it for so long.” 

“That is not our shtick.” 

“So giving up your preferences for someone else is only cute when Marco does it?” Eren asks. 

You roll your eyes. 

“Obviously it’s cute when you do it. You’ve been doing it since…since we were filming and I never even noticed.” 

“That’s kind of the point, sweetheart.” 

You shake your head. 

“Well, I have tons of secret romantic gestures that I do all the time too.” you defend. 

Eren laughs. 

“Are you trying to one up me?” 

“No! I actually do have secret romantic gestures that I do.” 

“No, you don’t.” 

“Yes, I do! How would you know?” 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Trust me, I know.” 

“They’re secret. That’s the whole point – that you have no idea that they’re even happening.” 

Eren reaches up, attentively tucking the loose strands of hair behind your ear, before giving your ear a quick pinch. 

“Trust me. There isn’t anything that you can’t keep a secret from me, and I love that about you.” 

You cross your hands over your chest. 

“Yeah. You should be more like me. Keeping secrets is really bad taste. Keeping secrets from your life partner is really bad taste.” you retort, emphasizing every last word. 

Eren gives you a full bodied laugh. 

“Okay, life partner. I can make no promises, but I’ll try.” 

--

ten years later - homecoming night 

The second you unlock the door to the house, Marco all but rustles past Eren on the porch through the door, and bounds up the stairs as quickly as he can.

The resounding sound of his bedroom door slamming shut is heard before you can even turn all the lights to the house or hang the keys back onto their hook, and it sends an unnerving feeling down your spine. 

“I thought he was just being quiet.” you murmur. 

Eren frowns. 

“Me too, sweetheart. Thought he was just tired from all the dancing that he did.” he whispers back. 

The two of you seem to have the same thought, almost instantaneously, as you look over to your left where Maya’s standing, notably and uncharacteristically quiet as she hangs her coat up on the rack.

It seems that she’s picked up on the thought that the two of you have had – that interrogating her is the best way to go – so she opts for an awkward salute and darts away to the kitchen. 

You and Eren spare each other a look, mentally noting that something definitely happened to Marco at the dance and agreeing that she’s keeping whatever it is to herself, before following after her into the kitchen.

She’s fast with it – already yanking the loaf of bread out of the case and reaching for the jar of Nutella – as you take her side and Eren walks away to get her a plate. 

“Hi Miss Maya.” 

“Hi Mom.” she responds, dragging out the syllables. 

“How was the dance?” you ask. 

Maya shrugs. 

“Good. The DJ was kind of bad. Someone spiked the punch. The dance was in an aquarium if you can believe it, so we spent most of the time walking around and looking at everything.” 

Eren brings a plate from the cabinet and sets it down in front of Maya, before quickly wrestling the jar from her and tasking himself with making the sandwich, before gesturing for you to attempt to ask again behind her back.

Eren’s always particularly cautious when it comes to these things – approaching the kids about personal matters because he was always so unsure of what to say. 

“Is there any way we can like…do something to preserve it?” she asks. 

“The corsage?” you ask. 

“Yeah. I just wanted to see if I could keep it. Since it’s the first one I’ve ever gotten and everything.” 

You smile. 

“I can do that. Like a pressed flower thing with the petals if that’s okay? And we can put the ribbon on the wrist in a little glass case with the flowers.” you ask. 

Maya gives you a nod, one that you return, as you set the corsage aside on the table. 

“So. Who gave you that? Must be someone special if you want to keep it.” Eren asks. 

Maya glares at Eren.

“My friends and I all got matching ones. And I just wanted to keep it because it was like…my first dance ever, you know? And I know that it’s special to get to go to one.” Maya states. 

“I’m just teasing, sweet pea. No need to get all upset over it.” Eren states. 

You note that her cheeks glow pink at being caught exaggerating over a simple comment, as you shoot Eren a look to leave her alone, before taking the corsage from her and setting it to the side. 

Eren takes a beat. 

“But why’s it so special, Maya?” 

He clearly didn’t take the hint. She takes a bite of the sandwich before she gives the two of you a halfhearted shrug. 

“I don’t know. You guys never got to go to a school dance together. Or school for that matter.” 

“We went to school, Maya.” Eren deadpans. 

“She means real school. You know, with school dances and prom and homecoming games and stuff. You’re right. It is very special. That was one of the things that I felt like I missed out on the most when I moved back home and had a break from acting, that I didn’t get to do normal things like other people because I picked something else.” you respond. 

You sigh, before pushing the thought away all together.

And abandon all attempts to beat around the bush, only because the thought of Marco sitting alone in his room upset, seems to make your stomach more uncomfortable and unnerved as time goes on.

That and the fact that Eren and Maya could easily argue about the dance for another hour. 

“You seemed like you had fun though, which is good to hear. We can’t really say the same about someone else, can we?” 

Maya frowns. 

“Please don’t ask. I don’t want to talk about it when it’s his thing to tell and…” 

“So something did happen?” Eren asks. 

Maya groans. 

“Dad.” 

“We should know! Just so we can help him out.” Eren responds. 

Maya shakes her head. 

“That’s like sibling code. He said that he didn’t want to talk about it so I don’t want you guys to go up there and start giving him a lecture about how things will work out and love exceeds all boundaries and stuff and that everything is forgivable with time and all that.” 

You and Eren spare each other a wide eyed glance. Only because there’s so much in the statement to unpack that you can’t even pick what it is that you want to respond to first. 

“Just because it was true for us?” you repeat. 

“Forgiveable with time?” Eren defends. 

Maya gives the two of you an exasperated look – like the premise she’s provided the two of you is completely reasonable. 

“We don’t lecture, Maya.” Eren adds. 

“You do. And…and I’m sure Marco gets it and he knows that things can work out, but sometimes they don’t. Especially when the person you like doesn’t like you back and you say some things that aren’t so nice…so just…leave him alone. It’s not something that you guys can understand.” 

You frown. 

“He likes someone?” 

“It’s definitely something that we can understand, Maya.” Eren defends. 

Maya deflates. You elbow Eren in the side – trying to signal that this is not the time for him to be having this conversation or getting offended – before turning back to Maya. You spare her one glance, and just as you expected, she immediately folds and divulges what the two of you have asked of her. 

“It’s Amal. Don’t talk to Uncle Connie about this because we all kind of agreed that the last thing we want you all to do is start fighting with each other.” 

You feel an uncomfortable pit in your stomach. 

“Would anything warrant us fighting with each other?” you ask. 

Maya sighs. 

“Look. Amal said some things to Marco and he said some things back after the fact. She went to the dance with her boyfriend tonight, which…which is why Marco’s upset. He knew that she had one but he didn’t really think that it was that serious, but they seemed like they really liked each other and they were together all night so it obviously made him upset.” 

You can’t help but feel your heart drop in your chest, as you give Maya a quiet nod, and Eren’s particularly silent at your side.

You can barely even process what it was that she said – the fact that your sneaking suspicion that he liked her was correct, that your other suspicion that she liked him back was almost completely wrong – and the single thing that you wanted to protect Marco from was the one thing that happened to him. 

Eren glares. 

“And?” 

“And what?” Maya repeats. 

“What did they say that was so bad?” 

Maya sighs. 

“Don’t say anything. Please.” Maya states. 

“We won’t, Maya.” Eren responds. 

“Amal’s boyfriend basically told Amal beforehand that he’s not really comfortable with how close they are with each other, especially since she told him that she kind of used to like Marco when they were in middle school.” 

“I knew it!” you whisper. 

“That’s not exactly helpful. Keep going.” Eren responds. 

“He asked her to keep her distance. She told him and they just got into a disagreement. Marco was confused why it was such a problem and she…she got so frustrated that she mentioned it was because she used to like him.” Maya offers. 

Maya pauses. 

“He was upset. Reasonably so. Amal told him that if he was ever serious enough to make a move, it wouldn’t be a problem. That he can’t be upset when everything that was happening was because he was to chicken to ever be serious about anything. Then he responded and told her that it wasn’t fair that she expected that of him – that she never even really cared him in the first place if she was able to throw their entire friendship away for something so stupid. That she was just as afraid of him to let anything happen for real.” 

“Oh.” 

“How heated was it?” Eren asks. 

“Pretty bad. I’m pretty sure that they’re not going to talk for a while. And she’ll probably distance from me too. But don’t let it affect you and Uncle Connie. That’s why we weren’t even planning on mentioning it.” 

Eren frowns. 

“You don’t have to sit here managing our feelings. We’re adults. And sure, it might feel like you’ve put us in an awkward position, but you’re all your own people. Don’t ever feel like you can’t come to us for anything.” 

Maya sighs, a breath of relief. 

“You know, you don’t have to stop talking to Amal if you don’t want to. She’s your friend too.” you offer. 

Maya shakes her head. 

“It feels wrong. I just want to be there for Marco, not make anything too awkward for him.” she responds. 

Eren walks up to Maya’s side, before sticking his hands firm on her shoulders, and visibly squeezing hard. 

“It might be hard, but you know he’ll appreciate it later on. That you’re here for him.” 

“It’s not hard at all actually. We’ve been together since the start. Kind of hard to imagine it any other way.” she murmurs. 

Maya gives the two of you a quiet nod, before pressing a kiss to both of your cheeks, and retreating to her own room with the half finished sandwich in your hand. You and Eren turn towards each other, and you can’t help but bury your head into his neck, as you roll over the thoughts in your head. 

That Marco liked Amal. That maybe he never even stopped liking her in the first place – from your first inklings of his interest as a kid – and now she was with someone else. That in some shape or form – his heart was crushed right now. That he could possibly be sitting there biting the words that he said. 

“Is it bad that I want to cry right now? And it didn’t even happen to me?” you murmur. 

Eren shakes his head. 

“Is it bad that I want to assault Amal’s boyfriend?” 

“Yes. He’s fifteen.” 

“Hey. I defended your thing.” 

“Well, I didn’t say that I wanted to assault a child, Eren.” you murmur. 

The two of you quietly laugh, before the heaviness settles back into the air, that it feels particularly thick and you can’t even stomach it, before you pull back to look at him. 

“Don’t worry. This is my territory.” Eren offers. 

“What do you mean?”

“Saying something you don’t mean. When you want to say something else entirely? It has me written all over it.” 

The feeling is so foreign – so foreign that it feels like you can’t even access that part of you anymore – the one that had pain that was associated with Eren at one point. He was so cemented into your life, quite literally in the center of it at this point, that it felt impossible to access that part of your brain, the one that remembered exactly what this feeling felt like. 

“Maya thinks we lecture about love? What exactly did she say again?” he whispers. 

“She said we give lectures about how things always work out and love exceeds all boundaries and stuff just because it was true for us.” you repeat. 

Eren narrows his eyes. 

“That’s so ridiculous.” 

“Imagine saying that to us when we were separated. Or filming together and too uncomfortable to talk to each other. It is true, but it definitely didn’t always feel that way. And I remember, it was particularly annoying when everyone was trying to convince me of the fact when that felt like that was the last thing to be true.” 

You sigh. 

“Maybe we should just go sit there with him. So he knows that he’s not alone.” 

You smile. 

“Yeah. No lecture.” 

The two of you quietly tiptoe back upstairs, offering a quiet knock against his door, before you peek in. Marco has all of his lights shut off, except for the lamp that’s on his bedside table, and his coat is discarded against his bed. 

He clearly didn’t attempt to change into more comfortable clothes, still clad in his button up shirt, as Eren reaches for the coat and puts it in a hanger, and you move around to the side that Marco’s facing.

You note that there’s fresh tear streaks on his cheek, falling horizontally from the way he’s lying down, as you reach forward to wipe the wetness away from his face. 

“Hi Marco. You mind if we join you?” you whisper. 

“I’m not talking about it.” Marco clarifies. 

“That’s fine. We were just going to lie down next to you. That’s all.” 

Marco flits his eyes between the two of you, Eren now standing at your side with his hand on your shoulder, as he gives the two of you a begrudging nod. The two of you give each other a halfhearted smile as he scoots over – Eren taking the left and you taking the right. 

It’s uncomfortable for the three of you to squish together on his bed, especially with how tall Marco’s getting, but you scoot in and intertwine your hand with his. You note that Eren’s pushing the hair away from his face, that he’s attentively focused on fixing it the same way that he does to you, and you absentmindedly squeeze Marco’s hand three times as you eye all of his baseball trophies and medals on the wall. 

Marco eventually returns the gesture and squeezes your hand back – one that luckily he knows the exact meaning of – and it makes your heart clench.

And it takes Marco twenty minutes, twenty minutes before he even divulges anything, and it nearly jolts you when he speaks again.

“I think I love Amal.” 

You pinch your lips together. 

“I know.” you respond. 

“She doesn’t love me back. Or she…she did and doesn’t anymore? I don’t know. She just doesn’t like me anymore.” Marco adds. 

Eren sighs. 

“We know.” 

Marco’s quiet. The two of you are quiet too, only because you don’t know what to say – can’t muster up the right string of words that could even provide the simplest solace. 

“Do you guys know how I realized that I liked her?” Marco whispers. 

The two of you shake your heads. 

“Sometimes, I’d walk into the room. You know, at Uncle Connie’s house, or at Teddy’s engagement party and…and I just found myself looking for her. I’d always walk into the room and look around, like…like frantically trying to find where it was that she was. Wasn’t really comfortable until I knew where she was for sure. It was the only place that I wanted to be. She’d ask me to get a drink or have to get up and leave to say hi to someone and I would just feel it, like in my gut, always aware of where she was and waiting for her to come back. Sometimes it felt like she was the only one there or she…” 

“She was all of the love in the room.” Eren adds. 

You can feel your heart drop in your stomach. 

“Just like you’ve always said. I get it now.” Marco finishes.  

You lean your head against his shoulder. 

“I’m very sorry, Marco. There’s no…nothing we can say to make it better and trust me, that…that kills us that we can’t fix this for you. Especially when we know how bad it hurts.” you murmur. 

Marco gives you one teary eyed laugh. It’s enough to make Eren smile, from what you can see in the dim light, as he returns to raking his fingers through Marco’s hair. 

“You’re funny.”

“What’s funny about that?” you deadpan. 

Marco shakes her head. 

“You don’t have to try to fix this. If anything, I’m sorry if I make things awkward for you and Uncle Connie. But this was going to happen to me at some point.” Marco responds. 

“Don’t worry about Connie.” Eren responds. 

“Yeah, I know, I just mean…” 

“No, really. Don’t worry about him. We’re all going to be just fine.” Eren adds. 

“Plus. What do you mean you knew that would happen to you?” you ask.

Marco shrugs. 

“Heartbreak. It was always going to happen to me. I mean, you guys haven’t really dated people other than each other, not technically anyways, and you guys still had your fair share of it, so…don’t know why I’d be spared from it.” Marco adds. 

You don’t get it. 

“I guess.” 

“I mean what I’m trying to say is that it’s…it’s okay that she doesn’t love me back. It was a long shot anyways.” 

Eren frowns. 

“Who said it was a long shot?” 

Marco shrugs. 

“It just feels that way. I’ve never even liked anyone else or even dated someone or held their hand. The premise of someone even liking me back feels like a long shot…that you can like someone, that they actually like you back, that it would actually work out. I feel like there’s so many factors, so many things that have to go right, for it to even work out in the first place and start dating. Then when you start dating, there’s other things that can go wrong – like someone moves away for college, you start liking someone else, producers think that you two shouldn’t be together for your careers.” 

You and Eren narrow your eyes at him and note the smallest whisper of a smile on his face. 

“You know. That stuff. But I just have to figure out what I’m going to do next, I guess. Especially since, I said some shit things to her.” 

Eren hums in response. 

“I’ve said worse.” 

Marco turns over to you. 

“Think she’ll ever forgive me?” 

You smile. 

“I don’t know. But I don’t think it’s impossible. There was a time when forgiving Eren seemed impossible too.” 

Marco sighs. 

“Even when I told her that I never even loved her in the first place? That it was unfathomable that I ever even felt that way?” 

You pinch your lips into a line. 

“Oh, yeah. We kept going at it for a little bit when Maya walked away.” Marco adds. 

“Time will help. Growing up a little and getting…getting new perspective on it will help both of you too.” Eren asks. 

“Kind of have to talk to her at some point, right? We’re basically family.” 

“You won’t have to see her all the time. We’ll do whatever you’re comfortable with..” Eren responds. 

“There’s other fish in the sea too, you know? You can meet people at other places. You know, when you go play college ball…and then get signed to the major league…and then become a hall of famer.” you joke. 

Marco shakes his head, smiling at how preposterous your comments are – at least to him. 

“You haven’t done anything yet, kid. So much to see and so many more people to meet. There’s still a lot to do.” Eren adds. 

“It’s pretty rare for most people to get it right on their first try.” you offer. 

Marco smiles. 

“You guys just get to be the lucky exception to that.” 

“As long as this doesn’t deter you from ever trying again. To be with someone, to love someone. Just promise us that you won’t ever shut it out if it’s with someone else.” Eren states. 

Marco smiles. 

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.” Marco repeats. 

The two of you smile. 

“It always seems to come back to him, when it comes to me. The other Marco, the one that told the two of you that.” 

You and Eren pause.

“What do you mean?” 

“I don’t know. I just feel like he always comes up, that I know so much about him, that I feel like I knew him. I obviously didn’t, but it just…he’s always brought up. By you guys, or Uncle Jean, and Connie that it’s just…I don’t know.” 

“Well, you never realize how important or impactful someone is until they leave. You don’t even realize how important certain moments are until they pass by and they’re gone.” you respond. 

Eren instinctively reaches for your free hand, across the way. You shoot him a halfhearted smile, and he squeezes your hand hard. 

“That’s not true.” 

“What do you mean?” you ask. 

“I mean, I know it’s true for you. Because you didn’t think that he was going to leave the way that he did. But I can realize the value of certain moments, as they happen you know. I know that in this moment in time that things can really only go up from here, now that this door is closed forever. And I’ll always remember that you guys were here with me, that I wasn’t alone.” Marco responds. 

You and Eren exchange a smile, before offering a breathless laugh. You reach over and flick him on the cheek – that earns you a laugh from Marco – before glaring at him. 

“What’s so funny, asshole? That was so sweet.” you state. 

Eren shrugs. 

“I just can’t believe this is our kid. If it were us, we’d be catastrophizing to the next level.” Eren states. 

“Writing depressing songs. Performing them in front of each other.” you add. 

Marco laughs. 

“That’s true. But you guys still do that, even when things aren’t even that serious. I mean the fact that you’re crawling into my bed with me right now is like…next level dramatic. That’s just how you guys are naturally.” 

Marco takes a beat. 

“And maybe it’s just proof that it won’t be like this forever. I think when it really came down to it, you both held out hope when it really mattered. Even if you didn’t say it out loud.” 

--

ten years later - midseason 

Marco’s able to make his way to the hospital on the sixth day. It’s when Connie’s mellowed out for the most part – certainly less weak from how the infection he had the week prior, the slightest bit more lively – and when the rest of you are able to breathe the smallest sigh of relief. 

He’s able to stomach cracking a few jokes, watch a few baseball games. And the rest of you rinse and repeat the same routine. Make trips back home. Get some sleep in between driving here and back. Before starting it all over again. 

And avoiding, desperately avoiding, thinking about the bombshell that the doctor dropped a few days ago. At least not until he was out of here for good. 

“How was your sleep?” Amal asks. 

Connie shrugs. 

“Worst I’ve ever had. But it’s okay.” 

Amal smiles, reaching forward to intertwine her hands in with his, and lean her head against the railing of the bed. 

“Did the Phillies win?” Connie asks. 

Amal shakes her head. 

“Did Marco start?” 

She shakes her head again. 

Connie turns over to where you and Eren are settled, a thin blanket spread over your legs and the seats so small that you’re both uncomfortably pressed against the wall. Eren’s slumped against you, making a horrible attempt to keep up with the book that you’re reading, as you elbow him in the side. 

“What’s going on? Why aren’t they playing him?” Connie asks. 

You shake your head. 

“He has to take breaks. With pitching and all.” you murmur. 

“He hasn’t pitched in a week. His arm is just fine.” Connie retorts. 

In his first year out of college, nearly three years ago, Marco signed with the Philadelphia Phillies as a free agent. He’s been with the team ever since, renewing his contract each season – and consequently, spending almost the entire year, from February to September, halfway across the country. 

And as a Los Angeles native, it took everything out of Connie to root for another team but he put it all aside as Marco’s biggest fan. Something he took serious pride in, as the first person in earnest to tell him to consider playing baseball for the major leagues in high school. 

Advice he gave him to deal with his fallout with Amal. Devoting himself entirely, to something that was just his.

Baseball.

“I think he’s just taking a break right now, Connie.” 

Connie nearly goes slack jawed. 

“Who takes breaks in the major leagues? Is he injured? Is he going to need another Tommy John surgery?” 

You shut the book, making the gesture abrupt so as to note your exasperation. With the way Connie acted, you’d be convinced he was the coach. 

“He’s okay, Connie. I promise.” Eren offers. 

“Plus, if it was something serious, he’d tell you. Right guys?” Amal offers. 

You and Eren give her an affirmative nod. She shoots the two of you an appreciative smile – since she was always particularly too stressed that Connie worked himself up too much and made himself more tired – before turning back to him. 

You eye your watch. 

“Eren and I are going to go down for some coffee. Want to come with, Amal?” 

“Sure. You’re fine here, Dad?” 

“Maryam’s here. Go ahead.” 

The three of you give Connie a halfhearted wave goodbye, before making your way down the hallway, nearly shuddering from the drafty, cold air outside the room. You’re all particularly silent as you make your way over the the elevator, Eren absentmindedly reaching for your hand to stay standing, and the three of you file into the elevator in a line. 

“Are you excited to surprise your dad?” you ask. 

Amal nearly jumps up at the question, eyes wide, before looking over at you. 

“Yes. Yeah, I…I can’t believe Marco would do something like that. My dad’s going to be so happy.” 

Over the course of the past year, Amal and Marco, albeit very slowly, reconnected. 

Connie, now reaching the end stages of his second successful transplant, was slowly deteriorating. Routine colds became serious infections and it was starting to feel like it did back then. 

Connie was in the hospital more often than he wasn’t. Walking too slow, too tired to talk. Exhausted everytime you saw him. 

And Marco – Marco who adored Connie as a mentor more than anything – couldn’t help but be distracted the more time he spent away. 

The only thing he could do was ask. Again and again – how Connie was doing, if he was able to stay up to watch his game, how he was feeling today, what changed in his treatment plan. And the only person who could coherently answer, who knew the answer as soon as it was relayed to everyone else, was Amal. 

He wasn’t satisfied with the answers you and Eren gave him. He felt better knowing that it was coming from someone who was by his side at all times. 

You had a sneaking suspicion that it had something to do with Amal. Maybe not originally, but it definitely did now. Not that his love for Connie was displaced, but from the conversations you were able to overhear in passing, it sounded more like twelve year old Amal and Marco giggling, than Marco just being plain old concerned. 

And midseason, Marco decided to pivot entirely. Granted, you figured it was a mainly rash decision that came from the news that you received last week – that Connie wouldn’t be able to handle  another transplant – and was moving back home. 

Since he decided that he was going to sign on with another team to be able to spend more time here. It was a rash decision, one that Amal constantly talked about not understanding, and you weren’t exactly sure why it was bothering her so much. Why she was so pressed to know what his thought process was when he did it.  

“It’s been a while since you’ve seen him in person, right?” Eren asks. 

Amal nods. 

“I think Teddy’s anniversary party. Two years ago? He’s always really busy these days.” 

“I mean, the Phillies aren’t even in the same league as any of the teams out here. Has to be something special for him to come out here outside of his routine.” you offer. 

“I know he’s going to be really happy that he’s coming home. He misses you guys. Talks about you all the time.” 

Eren looks over at you, an almost devious look in your eyes. You shoot him a warning glare. 

“How would you know that?” Eren asks. 

Amal’s eyes go wide. 

“What?” 

Eren shrugs. 

“That he misses us?” 

You roll your eyes. Eren was reserved when you brought up the idea when they were five years old – that they could like each other. At twenty-five, it seems that you and Eren had seemed to switch positions entirely. And become an instigator apparently.

But you were just being conservative, that making anything awkward between the two of them would just make things worse at this point. You would also make it a point to argue that Eren was just being overly hopeful. 

“And here I thought he was just calling to check in about Connie.” Eren states. 

You elbow Eren in the side. Amal’s cheeks flush pink. 

“He does! No really, I swear, we spend most of our time talking about him. Other stuff just comes up sometimes. We’re just…catching up after a long time.” Amal offers. 

“Must feel like nothing’s changed, right?” Eren asks. 

Amal smiles. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess it makes me kind of sad we fizzled out afte everything that happened, when it was inconsequential, but I guess there’s no point being upset about it now.” 

“Eren. Leave her alone, please.” you respond. 

Amal shoots you a smile. 

“Okay, fine. But just saying – don’t think it’s as inconsequential as you’re making it out to be.” Eren responds. 

The elevator whirs to a stop, the doors opening up, as the three of you make your way down the hall to the cafeteria, where Marco and Maya were waiting. You shoot Eren a glare at your side, one that he ignores, as you turn around the corner, and spot the two of them sitting by the window. 

You note that Amal tucks her hair behind her ears before walking up, as Eren reaches over and pokes Maya’s cheek to get her attention. She immediately swats him off, annoyed by the gesture, as you turn to give him a big grin. 

“Are you excited to be home, Marco?” you ask. 

Marco responds with a hug, one that’s painful at this point with the amount of time he spends working out, as you attempt to tap out of the hug on his shoulder. He immediately pulls back, shooting you an apologetic look, as you shake your head at him. 

Maya rolls her eyes, before turning over to Amal and giving her a quick hug. It’s at that moment that Marco seems to have realized that Amal’s come down with you and Eren, and gives her an almost ear splitting smile. 

“Is that you, Amo?” 

Amal very excited smile drops into a glare at him. 

“Don’t call me that.” she mumbles. 

“Call you what?” Marco asks, his tone almost sing-song. 

“Amo. We’re not two years old anymore. You’re old enough to pronounce my name.” 

Marco reaches forward, pinching the side of her cheek that she quickly swats off, before giving her a proper laugh. 

“But it’s just so much more fun that way.” Marco retorts. 

You and Eren shoot each other a look – mainly to confirm that the two of you are seeing the same thing – as you step back, looping your arms in with Maya’s. Amal takes the lead, Marco basically clininging to her side, as the three of you step in line behind back to the elevator. 

“So.” you start. 

“What’s the deal with that?” Eren murmurs, quiet enough that only the three of you are able to hear it.

Maya shakes her head and you swear there’s the smallest making of a smile on her face. 

“Don’t ask.” 

“So there is a deal with that? That we shouldn’t be asking about?” you whisper. 

Maya gives you an exasperated sigh. 

“I think they’re just catching up on lost time.” 

You shoot her one last look, before the five of you file down into the elevator this time around, as Marco teeters back and forth on the balls of his feet. A nervous habit – one he’s had since you were a kid. 

“You don’t have any reason to be nervous, Marco.” you state. 

“I’m not. I know I made the right choice.” Marco responds. 

“Why are you rocking back and forth then?” 

Marco shakes his head. 

“Just feels weird to be back. For good, you know?” 

“What do you mean for good?” Amal asks. 

“I signed a six year contract. I’m back home for good. At least for the time being.” Marco states. 

“Oh.” Amal murmurs. 

The elevator dings as it slowly stops and the five of you beeline down the hallway. You absentmindedly reach for Eren’s hand as you turn down the corner and enter the room again, noting that Jean and Mikasa arrived in the time that you spent downstairs. You shoot them a smile in recognition, before leaning against the wall. 

“I’m going to start needing a bigger room if you’re all planning on coming here so often.” Connie jokes. 

“You should start looking into options.” Marco states. 

Connie turns his head to the side, to note exactly who it was that says that, and immediately widens his eyes in shock. Mouth slightly parted and a frown on his face, before he looks around, almost like he’s checking if everyone else can see him too – to confirm, that yes, he really is here. 

Connie’s entirely distracted by the sight of Marco, mainly murmuring under his breath about how much he’s grown – something you entirely can’t believe on your own with the amount of training that he does – as he takes to feeling him up. 

“How’s your arm? You haven’t played in a while.” 

Marco pinches his lips into a smile. 

“Yeah, I’ve just been resting up.” Marco responds. 

“Resting for what?” Connie asks. 

Marco grins, so boyish that you see the four year old still in him. 

“My start as a Los Angeles Dodger.” 

Connie’s face drops into a frown. Connie looks around the room, mainly at the fact that the group of you can’t seem to contain your laughter at how shocked he is – for a second time – as he turns to you and Eren for confirmation. 

“Seriously.”  Eren confirms. 

You reach in your bag for the crumpled up jersey and throw it straight at him. 

“It’ll be official later today.” 

“I haven’t been playing for a few weeks since we were negotiating deals and all that.” Marco adds. 

“You’re switching to Los Angeles? Mid-season?” Connie asks. 

“Figured it was better to be close to home. I can see you more often and Maya when she’s around.” 

Marco takes a beat. 

“And someone has to deal with the crashout that Amo has almost ever week.” 

“Hey!” Amal responds, reaching forward to smack him. 

Connie looks down, before running hand hand over the letters on the jersey. 

“You did this for me?” he murmurs. 

Marco shrugs. 

“It’s no big deal.” 

Connie drops the jersey into his lap. 

“No big deal? You were doing amazing where you were, kid.” 

Marco shrugs. 

“And I’m sure I’ll do great here. Even better, since this is really where I want to be. No distractions, my family to support me. And best of all, I can be here for you. Almost as often as I can afford.” 

Connie frowns. 

“You did this for me?” 

“Sure did. Wouldn’t be anywhere without you guys.” 

Marco pauses and turns to Amal. 

“Every single one of you.” 

Needless to say, you and Eren spend at least two hours trying to deduce what that meant on the drive home. 

--

six months later 

You and Eren make your best attempt to ignore Marco and Amal shouting outside the door. It’s a task that proved to be particularly difficult – not only because they’re super loud, but also because it’s the first time they’ve argued in the six months since Marco’s return.

Of course it happens on the precipice of Connie having another surgery at the end of the week and, of course, right outside of Connie’s hospital room. 

From what you can see through the blinds, they’re both particularly angry, waving their hands around, pinching the bridges of their noses. Marco’s almost red in the face, Amal can barely barely keep eye contact with him, so much so, that it sneds a nervous wave through your stomach. 

“Should we intervene?” you murmur. 

Eren shakes his head. 

“They’re adults. They can handle this on their own.”

“Can they? It’s been twenty minutes of this.” 

“We can’t intervene.” Eren states, through clenched teeth.  

“Maybe they can handle this when he’s not in earshot? And about to wake up?” 

“I can hear them just fine.” Connie murmurs, eyes pinched shut as he stirs in his bed, his body visibly stiff as he moves in his bed. 

“Sorry, Con. Not sure what’s gotten into them.” you offer. 

“What are they arguing about?” Connie asks. 

Maryam shrugs. 

“None of us know. I could sense they’ve been off since the beginning of the week, since you got in here.” Maryam offers. 

“Does it seem serious?” Connie asks. 

You lean back. 

“Not sure. I mean, they haven’t argued since….since they stopped talking, all the way back then. At least to my knowledge.” you respond. 

It’s the first time the four of you address that – that Amal and Marco hadn’t talked for years, because they liked each other. It was an easy topic for the four of you to avoid, mainly in name of keeping the peace, but it always seemed to linger in the air.

Since they spent what felt like the entirety the last ten years refusing to be present, when the other was in attendance. 

Connie deflates, as he gestures for you to get them. You walk over and knock on the window loudly – enough to stop the two of them from arguing and look over – as you gesture for them to walk in.

They shoot each other one last warning glare, before joining you inside, the two of then notably quiet as they lean against the counter pushed against the wall. 

You walk over to the side of the bed and place a hand on Connie’s shoulder, noting that his skin is ice cold when you touch him. 

“How are you feeling though, Connie?” you ask. 

He shoots you a weak smile. 

“I would feel better if I got some more sleep.” Connie murmurs, shooting a warning glance to where Marco and Amal are standing. 

You watch as they both look down at the ground – Marco focusing on his untied laces and Amal nervously fidgeting with their hands – as they refuse to acknowledge what he’s said. 

“Amal. Come here.” Connie murmurs. 

You move out of the way, pushing the empty seat closer to the bed so that she can sit comfortably, as you take the spot that Amal was just occupying, and loop your arm in with Marco’s. 

“What’s your deal, kid?” you murmur. 

Marco shakes his head. 

“It’s nothing.” 

“Doesn’t seem like nothing, Marco.” 

You watch as Amal reaches over, intertwining her own fingers with Connie’s, as she reaches forward and squeezes his shoulder. 

“What are you guys fighting about?” Connie asks. 

“Nothing, Dad.” 

Connie shoots her a glare. 

“I just…I don’t appreciate you guys arguing like that.” 

“Trust me. We don’t have much fun doing it either.” Amal repsponds, sarcastically. 

Marco nearly breaks out into a smile. You note that he makes his best effort not to. 

Connie shakes his head. 

“I just…” 

Connie looks down, as he fidgets with the bracelet that’s hanging from her wrist. 

“I would appreciate it if you didn’t alienate or fight with the people around you. I understand that all of this can be stressful, but you’re going to need these people. Especially him, when he’s been here the entire time.” 

“I know. I know, I just…” 

Connie shakes his head. 

“It makes this easier for me. Knowing that the two of you are fine, that he’s going to be here for you, because it means you won’t be alone when I’m gone.” 

Amal’s face immediately drops. And at your side, Marco seems to tense up. 

“Dad. What are you…”

“We all know I really only have a few weeks left. Realistically. And while I know won’t get to see you finish graduate school or get married or anything…I feel better knowing that you’re surrounded by good people who will take care of you. People who took care of me when I was younger. If I had listened to them, I probably could have had more time with you.” 

You watch as Eren drops his gaze, focused on fidgeting with the bracelet clad around your wrist. 

“Don’t talk like that.” 

“You know it kills me that I won’t ever get to meet the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. At least let me have the solace that I know you’ll be in good company. That people will take care of you.”  

“You can’t be serious. Don’t talk like that.” she repeats.

Connie sighs. 

“It’s time for us to be serious.” 

Amal deflates before she looks back, teary eyed at Marco, who exasperatedly lifts his hands in the air. She closes her eyes, almost in silent recognition, before turning back towards Connie. 

“Dad.” 

Amal sighs. Marco straightens up at your side and pushes off the wall. He places his hand on Amal’s shoulder and squeezes. 

“We’re having a very heated conversation. But that’s just because we’re both very passionate, especially when we’re talking about you. We…are just fine. I’m not going anywhere.”  

Connie shakes his head. 

“It’s not you I’m worried about. It’s her. She has a tendency to alienate people when she shouldn’t. Let people walk away when they shoudn’t have.” Connie states. 

The comment is pointed. Pointed at enough at the one thing no one in the room ever seems to acknowledge. 

“Well, she can try as hard as she wants. I won’t be going anywhere, I swear.” Marco states. 

From where you’re standing, you watch as Marco looks down at Amal, eyes widened, as she vehemently shakes her head. You get a feeling that whatever he just said – whatever the two have been saying for the past few minutes – weren’t responses to Connie, and instead, a continuation of whatever they were doing outside. Just as heated as it was out there, as Connie turns to you and shoots you a confused glare. 

“Do you guys want to share your conversation with the rest of us?” Eren asks. 

“I think that would be very appreciated, wouldn’t it?” Maryam adds. 

Amal shoots Marco one last warning glare, before he takes a deep breath in. 

“Amal and I have been together since the end of last year. Almost eleven months. And she hasn’t wanted to tell any of you…because she’s scared that it’s going to make it real.” 

“What?” you ask. 

“I’m not scared it’s going to make it real. I just don’t want to divert attention away from my dad.” 

“You wouldn’t divert attention away from your dad. If you were listening, you would understand that it would probably make him really happy. And it would probably do you some good to not be living in a lie.” 

Amal shakes her head, almost exasperated. 

“I know it would make him happy. It would make all of them happy! But that’s just the point, we don’t even know where this is going, we can’t just back out of it when we don’t know! It’s not a lie – it’s an obstruction of truth to protect him. ” 

“What do you not know? How can you possibly not know?” Marco asks. 

“What do you mean?” 

“How can you not know where this is going with me? Are you seriously still trying to sort your feelings out?” 

Amal pinches the bridge of her nose. 

“I don’t know where you’re going to be a year from now. That you won’t remember what happened years before and suddenly decide, you’re not about this. If this gets to hard for you.” 

“I’m about this! I’ve always been about this.” Marco defends. 

“Oh yeah? You could easily be spending what’s probably the highest point of your career outside this hospital celebrating. But you’re not. Because of me. You think that won’t catch up to you? You think you won’t resent me for it later? You’re not about this, because you don’t even understand where it’s going to go.” 

Marco shoots her one last glare, before reaching for his bag that’s lying across the counter, and reaches for a small velvet box that’s in the front pocket. He tosses the box over at her, his arms crossed over his chest, as he watches her open it up. You and Eren stand on your tiptoes to get a peek – a peek at a glittering diamond ring set in the box – as he raises his hands in the air. 

“I’ve always been about this. For months. You’re the one chickening out. You’re the one who doesn’t understand me.” Marco responds, before he pushes off the counter, and turns on his heel to exit from the door. 

You watch as Amal catches the box, entirely unphased by the fact that he’s stormed out o fht eroom, because she’s too busy staring down at the box, in what you’re assuming is disbelief. You and Eren shoot each other a look - your heads nearly spinning - before turning back to the group of them. 

“We’ll go after him. I think everyone here should just take a breather.” 

You and Eren – with Maya dragging behind on her heels – basically jog down the hall to catch up to Marco, who exits straight onto the patio of the hospital ward, and leans against the railing. The view below isn’t exactly pretty, a jammed street with loud honks, and the sun so bright that you’re all squinting your eyes. 

The three of you follow his lead, resting your limbs against the railing and resting your chins on top of your hands as you look down, at the people bustling by on the sidewalk. It’s quiet for some time – as you assume the rest of them are wrestling with the same thoughts that you are – except for Marco of course, who breaks the silence. 

“I wanted to tell you.” Marco offers. 

Eren sighs. 

“We can figure that much out, kid.” Eren responds. 

“She just didn’t want to mention it. It never seemed like a good time because we hadn’t seen each other in person for so long and then Uncle Connie was in surgery or it was an away week for me and I just…a lot of time kept passing by and before I knew it, it had been so long.” 

You smile. 

“We’re not upset with you.”  you add.  

“I know. That somehow makes it worse.” 

You turn over to Maya at your side, reaching to fix the flyaway hairs decorating her face behind her ears. 

“Did you know Maya?” you ask. 

She smiles. 

“I figured it out after the first month. Not much he can keep from me.” she murmurs softly. 

Marco presses his lips to the back of his hand. When he talks again, his voice comes out muffled. 

“What do you think I should do, Mom?” 

“You’re asking me?” 

Marco shrugs. 

“Seems like you were always the one who had to take a leap of faith. What do you think I should do?”

You smile. 

“Sleep on it.” 

He narrows his eyes at you. 

“Really? No, you should go for it, if that’s what you really want.” Marco murmurs. 

You all laugh, before you and Eren seem to have the same thought, and lean your heads against his shoulders. 

“If you wanted that advice, you should have asked, Eren.” 

“What do mean?” 

“He was the go-getter. Evne quietly, still doing something that took serious guts. But if you’re sincerely asking me, as someone who has doubts almost all the wya to the end, until it’s spelled out to me in simple letters, you should sleep on it. You don’t know how you’ll feel tomorrow in the morning. 

Eren smiles. 

“She’s right. Thinking about it too fast is never the best decision. I’ve just lucked out and somehow made the right ones, but you should sleep on it. We can all say bye and head home for today.” 

“If you think that’s what best.”��

You look down at the street, where the painter on the corner is painting what you can only assume is an ocean – a vast sea of blue all over the canvas. 

“The only thing I'm shocked about is that you...you were able to buy a ring without even consulting us?" Eren asks.

Marco shrugs.

"I mean, it's kind of like Auntie Lana said. When you know, you know?"

You can tell that Eren's fighting the urge to smile - that the thing, that warmth that's simmering in your chest from the sentiment - must be present in his heart too.

"You're really good at that, you know?" Eren states.

"Good at what."

"Sweet talking your way out of an awkward conversation."

--

The following morning, you can’t help but note how much Marco is fidgeting in the elevator – messing with his cap, cracking his knuckles, teetering back and forth – as you make your way down the hospital ward, back towards Connie’s room. 

None of you had talked since last night. Mostly because Connie barely slept through the night, riddled with stomach pain, and Marco and Amal didn’t get a spare second. Or didn’t spare a second to discuss what had happened. 

“Nervous?” you ask. 

Marco shakes hs head. 

“No. Just hope he’s okay, it didn’t sound great.” 

As you turn around the corner and walk into the room, the four of you abruptly stop in the doorway, taken aback by how particularly crowded it is in the room. Faces you haven’t seen in a while – Levi, Sasha, Lana and Sukuna and Mikasa – and little streamers hanging from the ceiling. The four of you give each other a confused look as you turn over to where Connie’s sitting in the bed, brightly smiling at the four of you. 

“Good morning.” Connie states. 

You set your bag down on the floor, as the four of you sideshuffle into what seems to be the only open spot in the room, and lean against the wall. 

“Morning, Con.” Eren murmurs, cleary barely even registering what’s happening – what he’s said – as he drops his hand and reaches for yours. 

“Did some decorating last night, did you?” you ask. 

“Big occasion today.” Connie states. 

“Is that right?” Maya asks. 

Connie gives her an affirmative nod. 

“So we’re obviously missing something then? If everyone’s down here, and seemingly more in the loop with these godawful streamers, than we are.” Eren asks. 

“Where’s Amal?” Maya asks. 

“Right. She would be down the hall, in the bathroom. You should go join her – Olivia and Gracie are there – and Maryam, who is probably no help with how emotional she can get.” 

“Emotional about what?” you ask. 

“Our daughter’s getting married, of course.” Connie states. 

That’s what gets Marco to break his vow of silence. 

“To who?” Marco asks. 

Jean’s the first one to cross the way, as he puts one arm all the way around his shoulder. 

“You, silly.” 

“What?” Marco asks. 

“Heard there was a ring. And that it was huge. We all want to see it.” Jean states. 

Marco looks like he's running a blank.

"Right. I...I don't exactly have it."

"Because you threw it at her? You threw something at your future wife?" Sukuna asks.

Marco gives him an awkward sheepish smile.

“I mean, we heard it wasn’t exactly a proposal, screaming at each other and all that. But given who your parents are, we would be shocked if there wasn’t an element of dramatics involved in all of this.” Levi offers. 

Eren rolls his eyes. And every sentence that everyone seems to say goes entirely over your head - because you can't possibly fathom what's going on. 

“I brought you a button up shirt. Best I could do on such short notice, when they told me to drive down here and procure a tux.” Levi mutters. 

Marco gives everyone a confused look. 

“Can…can I talk to Amal or something? What the hell is going on? I can’t exactly stomach this when…” 

“Take the shirt. Men’s bathroom is right next to where she is.” Levi states. 

You watch as Marco begrudgingly takes the shirt, before basically sprinting past the window towards where the bathroom is. Jean and Mikasa give you a quick swift hug, the latter wrapping her arm around you as she murmurs under her breath. 

“Trust me, we found out just minutes before you did.” Mikasa states. 

“I’m confused, is what I am.” 

Mikasa shrugs as Levi joins you at your side.  

“From what I understand, Marco and Amal had some argument yesterday? And he threw a ring at her? And then she was shocked, and she felt so horrible, that she arranged some wedding that Connie would be able to see by the end of the week.” Levi states. 

You sigh. 

“I see. I just think that…” 

There’s a warm hand that wraps around your waist. Eren’s sweet smell envelopes your nose as you feel him by your side

“Give me a second, Mikasa, Levi?” Eren asks. 

She gives you a squeeze on the shoulder, as Eren looks down at you, warm hands enveloping your cheeks. You narrow your eyes at him, particularly noting that he’s less shocked – not the slightest bit reserved. 

“You don’t seem very phased.” you murmur. 

“I’m not really sure what’s going on. Nothing to be phased about when I'm confused, sweetheart.” Eren responds back. 

“What’s going on is that my daughter is a coward. And probably too concerned that we're a burden to her, even more so to anyone else. And buying a ring months ago is a big gesture – a huge one that gives her heart consolation that your son really does loves her – and now realizes that she’s probably hurt him in ways she can’t imagine. For a second time.” Maryam states. 

“So…” Eren asks, gesturing for her to continue. 

Connie sighs. 

“If your son is bold enough to buy a ring after a few months of dating, my daughter is bold enough to marry him on the spot. That’s what happening. If he agrees to it, of course.” 

“Oh.” 

“And she wanted to do it right now, today. So that Connie could see it…if…if he doesn't make it to the end of the week.” 

"I see."

“I figure he'll come around. Big gestures seem to do that.” Eren offers. 

You shoot him a glare. 

“Hilarious. You’re just going to let Marco do this? He…” 

He wants to get married. Married right here, in a few minutes, in a disgustingly oversized shirt that Levi’s offered him. 

“He will make the right decision. You and I should just sit here and let him figure it out.” 

"Eren."

Eren shakes his head.

"On my life." he whispers.

"What?"

"Don't protest. Just let it happen."

“You’re sure about this?” you ask. 

“Trust me. Has he ever gone astray?” 

You deflate. 

“No, but…” 

“So let him stick with it. We've stuck with so many things, probably done so many things that look wrong to other people on the outside. Maybe this is what's right for him.” 

Eren shrugs. It’s a good enough answer for you, as you and Eren take your spot in the corner of the wall, as everyone makes small conversation. It feels like an eon passes – an insurmountable amount of time – as you all linger in the room, before the group of them return. 

Marco’s shirt doesn’t exactly fit him right. Definitely too big on him, loose around the arms. Levi definitely overestimated. Amal’s wearing sneakers underneath her dress, you’re assuming because she forgot about the shoes, and the bouquet that was wilting yesterday is in her hands. 

“Hi.” Marco breathes. 

“Hi Marco.” 

Of course Jean is the only one who responds. 

“So I’m getting married. Did…did anyone else figure everything else out?” he states.

There’s an excited giggle that goes around the room, a wolf whistle from Jean, that sends the both of them into a blushing red mess. Gracie and Olivia step up. 

“Clothes were the best that we could do on a short notice. Levi’s technically officiated to marry people, so he’s got that – I mean, you guys can sign real legal documents later this is obviously ceremonial – and you have a ring.” Olivia states. 

“Did anyone bring a ring for me? One that she can put on me?” Marco asks. 

You can’t help but lean back against Eren, as he rests his chin on top of your head, and feel your heart clench. There’s a quiet look around the room, as everyone eyes each other. 

“You can have mine.” Connie offers. 

You all watch as Connie slides the sliver ring off of his finger, before extending it out to Marco in his palm. 

“Great. I’ll give it right back after.” 

Connie shakes his head, his hand intertwined with Maryam’s, as he insists. 

“You can keep it. As your own wedding ring.” 

“You can’t be serious.” Marco states. 

“Dead serious.” he responds. 

You elbow Eren in the side. 

“What?” 

“Offer yours instead. He’s our kid.” you mumble. 

Eren nods quickly, as he sidesteps and gestures for Connie to put his hand down. 

“No, Connie. He can have mine. He’s my son.” 

Connie shakes his head. He reaches for Eren’s arm, his fingers clasped around his forearm, as he narrows his eyes. You swear his eyes are glassed over. 

“You…are hopefully going to need your wedding ring for a long time. A long, long time because you and Y/N are going to live the closest thing to forever. From what I assume is the universe's consolation for spending so much time apart. Mine won’t have much use towards the end of the week and I figured…they would make better use of it. I wouldn’t want you guys to do anything else with my wedding ring when I’m gone.” 

When you look up, there’s wet tears running down Connie’s sallowed cheeks. You’re unable to swallow the lump in your throat, as Eren slides his ring back on his finger, too quiet to respond, as Marco – who is unable to keep it in now too – takes the ring in his palm and twists it around in his fingers. You know for a fact that the date of Connie and Maryam’s wedding are engraved in the lining, along with their initials. 

“You’re missing one.” Sasha states, through her tears.  

“Missing what?” Niccolo asks. 

“Something old is the shirt. It’s Levi’s. Amal’s ring is something new, Marco’s ring is something borrowed. You guys just need something blue.” 

The group of you rummage through your bags and turn out your pockets. Until Maryam yanks something out of the bottom of her bag – the original jersey that Marco gifted Connie when he returned six months ago – that has blue stitching on the letters. 

“You want him to get married in a baseball jersey.” you deadpan. 

You all watch as Marco and Amal turn to each other and grin. 

“I’ll wear it.” Marco murmurs, as Maryam hands the shirt over to him, and you all watch him button it up. 

“That’s…that’s actually kind of perfect.” Amal murmurs. 

“That was the first thing that he did. Came back to LA for Amal.” Maya murmurs. 

And that’s how the rest of it goes – something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue – all wrapped up to represent all of the love, the most that you could fathom you'll ever feel, in the room.

--

an: two days ago was my one year anniversary of finishing method acting! as consolation for how much love you have given this fic, here's an extra! <3

taglist: not quite sure if anyone would want to stay on the taglist for extras. so I did not use it.

[seeingivy]

hello ronnie dear i hope you're keeping well !!!! xx

in other news @deusfoundry and i r back on the agenda

hello my beloved i hope you're doing well too!!!!

THIS LIKE NEVER STOPS BEING FUNNY TO ME. can't believe other people have louis and olivia ruined for them in their mind the same way that I do

[seeingivy]

Ronnnieeeeee!!

Checking in on you. How are you doing? I think you should be wrapping up school or have GRADUATED, right? 🥳🎓

Sending my love, as per usual!

-TxG Anon 🤍🖤

hi sweetie pie!

i'm doing okay! i have two more weeks of classes, before finals and graduations...which is like super late for my university. we usually end around the second week of may but every third year there's an extra week...and of course that's when i'm graduating LOL.

just been super busy with senior stuff! I defended my honors thesis last saturday and I have a bunch of senior awards ceremonies this week. one of my childhood best friends is also getting married so i've just been all over the place.

I am very excited to have some free time coming up! (and to hopefully write stuff)