senselesswanders - Tumblr blog

[senselesswanders]

And here, in the lowest depths of my soul, still I hear the voice of God, holding me, sustaining me.

[senselesswanders]

We have all been here before. These stories have already played out. And in every iteration, beloved, you are only the loser.

[senselesswanders]

I lie here paralysed, trying to fight battles that cannot be won. The stories have already been written

[senselesswanders]

It's like my brain is short circuiting. There is no more wise decision, no more goodness. I dream of comfort, I dream of blades, I dream of droplets of hot blood, I dream of oblivion

[senselesswanders]

At the foot of a mountain of ruins

[senselesswanders]

Who shall I be angry at?

[senselesswanders]

And when I try to forget, my dreams return to haunt me

[senselesswanders]

Who could understand what it means to be so haunted by the destruction of my own hands? So.. so what if I gave in? So what if I went under and forgot

[senselesswanders]

Where else should I land the broken pieces of my faith, if not in the hands of God Himself?

[senselesswanders]

I balance on the knife edge of my faith, I profess to belief even when the emptiness of it haunts me, the words die on my tongue, my shadow flits in, my shadow flits out, somewhere on the edge

[senselesswanders]

girl, haunted

[senselesswanders]

Here, a portrait only of loss

[senselesswanders]

In another life, I am finally loved in more than halves.

[senselesswanders]

the physical pains in my chest

[senselesswanders]

open wound

[senselesswanders]

Stranger, an Armenian folk poem (from “Anthology of Armenian poetry")

[senselesswanders]

Because what if instead of enduring the humiliations, I take a blade to my skin. What if? What then?