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viceinvestigator.

nods to show approval when pronunciation is almost spot on   —–   would normally nitpick needlessly just to convince the room he knows something others don’t, and it isn’t easy to grasp, but it’s chris, and he doesn’t play games with chris.   this cherubic, tear-stained face calls for sincerity at a minimum.   for a second the other’s vocal demonstration doesn’t click, the invisible colleague doesn’t register, but when phrase is repeated a fresh smile blooms.   he’s actually proud, it’s the kind of fast growing feeling starting in his heart, filling gut like rain water into a puddle, inspiring the urge to stand and escape   —–   outrun it.   but he doesn’t. 

“ exactly.   you’d look good in a three-piece, chambers.   you’d look just right. ”   still smiling, dill takes glasses from his forehead;   has to be careful now, unraveling a loose curl from the center before daring to fully extract the frame.   levels and slides them over chris’ nose so his view of dillon blurs suddenly.   dill is far sighted, so the farthest corners of the room are undisturbed.      “ the other lawyers at your firm won’t know what hit them. ”

redirects chris’ hair behind his ears along with supporting arms of the glasses.   just little unnecessary brushes of his fingertips along temple and around the ear, as he takes in the other’s new appearance.      “ do you think you’ll keep a bottle of something stronger in your desk drawer, like they do in the movies   —–   for celebrations ?   or for when i visit ? ”  

briefly cups chris’ chin with affection before dropping his hand to the floor again.   dill does like tea, but he also likes the idea of a bonafide attorney doing shots midday between paperwork.      “ is that actually allowed ? ”

        ‘ yeah? oh -- careful, be careful ... might ... y'don't wanna tug! it -- the little --- the curl doesn't wanna let go, huh, dill? ’ chris blinks hard once, mouth forming a small 'o' as dill takes his glasses out of his hair. he wasn't sure why he cared so much, but he did ... so much so, that he couldn't concentrate on anything else during the transfer ... he had to watch .. make sure that the curls didn't snag. it wouldn’t feel very pleasant but chris was anticipating it and would be there to soothe if anything ‘went wrong’. ‘ close one --- huh? ’ he laughs and blinks hard once again, ‘ where'd y'go? ' the dried tears made his face feel tight when he smiled - it itched but he was happy to be smiling so it would be easy to ignore. ‘ y’look like a big ‘ol blob, dill! like, uh -- like you’re just dust! but i know you’re there, man. i know it. ’

       chris lets out a content ‘hm’ when dill brushes his hair back. touch - no matter how light or fleeting - was soothing. you could get him to do virtually anything if you patted him on the back, touched his cheek, etc. chris’ head lulls backwards, his face scrunching while his eyes got used to the glasses. he couldn’t see anything but it was fun to guess what things were. ‘ you see this blurry all the time, dill? ’ he lifts his hands up so he can look at them, tilting his head forward every so often to look over the frames. 

       ‘ oh ‘course i will. ’ he pushes the glasses up with the back of his hand before taking hold of dillon’s knee, ‘ you gotta help me pick somethin’ though ‘cos i don’t know much ‘bout that kinda stuff. ’ chris didn’t drink - no ... not since he was in his early teens. ‘ but the bubblier the better - yeah, ‘cos you know how in those movies they shake the bottle, ’ he squeeze’s dill’s knee and shifts forward, wearing his biggest smile, ‘ and then everyone pretends they don’t know what’s ‘bout to happen? and the bottle EXPLODES! ’ a proper giggle escapes him when dill cups his chin, ‘ you askin’ me if you’re allowed to drink on the job as a lawyer? ’ when dillon lets go of his chin, he tilts his head back again - trying to wiggle the glasses up the bridge of his nose without actually touching them. chris would never survive glasses ... he’d be too distracted! ‘ you’re not ‘llowed but chris chambers isn’t one for following r u l e s. oh man, i want that to happen all the time. every time you visit, okay? which, hey -- ’ he drops his hand from dillon’s knee and his head, ‘ you’re still gonna visit lots, right? ’ 

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❛ not sure if i should show you. ❜

      ‘ no, dill -- ’ chris shakes his head and lifts a hand, brows furrowed, ‘ you can show me anythin’. good ‘er bad ... well ... ‘specially bad ‘cos i know how hard it is to show people bad things especially if y’think they’re gonna react a certain way but, ’ he offers a small smile ... hoping to comfort if this was bad. ‘ i’m not a big reactor and ... and i’m here for ya always no matter what ... and i’m gonna be a lawyer soon so if you need someone to represent you, i’ve gotchya covered. no questions asked, ‘kay? ’ he goes to cross his arms but decides against it - negative body language ... he didn’t want dill to think he was closing him off. instead he reaches forward and pats dill’s arm before clasping his hands together, ‘ so what’s up? good or bad? blood and guts? i’ve seen plenty’ah dead bodies. don’t worry. ’

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rosewater1997:

i know its unhealthy to live in your own dream world but like…its safe bitch

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“ people drag you down. ”

      ‘ don’t let them. tell ‘um to fuck off or somethin’. they have no business tellin’ you how you should live your life, carl. ’ his head felt heavy, but valium would do that to you. ‘ i mean it … don’t put up with that shit. all you gotta do is show ‘um you mean it once … y’know … rough ‘em up. a nice punch to the gut ‘er somethin’. if they have half a brain they’ll leave you alone ‘fer good. and if they don’t … well … get ‘rid of ‘um. y’know, however, ’ he gestures and lets his head roll to the side, ‘ you see fit. scare them away or something. threaten them until they leave. people who are toxic will be toxic ‘fer’ever and you don’t have time for that shit. ’ 

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DO I WANNA KNOW    ?

❛    are there some aces up your sleeve    ?    ❜ ❛    have you no idea that you’re in deep    ?    ❜ ❛    i dreamt about you nearly every night this week.    ❜ ❛    how many secrets can you keep    ?    ❜ ❛    there’s this tune i found that makes me think of you.    ❜ ❛    was sort of hoping that you’d stay.    ❜ ❛    so have you got the guts    ?    ❜ ❛    i’m sorry to interrupt.    ❜ ❛    we could be together if you wanted to.    ❜ ❛    maybe I’m too busy being yours to fall for somebody new.    ❜

R U MINE    ?

❛    i’m a puppet on a string.    ❜ ❛    here isn’t where i wanna be.    ❜ ❛    i can’t help myself.    ❜ ❛    are you mine    ?    ❜ ❛    are you mine tomorrow    ?    ❜ ❛    i just wanna hear you say you got me baby.    ❜

ONE FOR THE ROAD.

❛    i saw this coming from the start.    ❜ ❛    i knew this would be on the cards.    ❜ ❛    don’t get that sinking feeling.    ❜ ❛    don’t fall apart.    ❜ ❛    soundtrack to disaster.    ❜ ❛    will you pour me one for the road    ?    ❜

ARABELLA.

❛    you can’t be sure.    ❜ ❛    it’s an exploration.    ❜ ❛    just a slip underneath it i hope.    ❜

I WANT IT ALL.

❛    i want it all.    ❜ ❛    can you feel it    ?    ❜ ❛    stone cold miracle.    ❜ ❛    it hit me.    ❜

NO. 1 PARTY ANTHEM.

❛    you’re on the prowl.    ❜ ❛    never knowing when to stop.    ❜ ❛    call off the search for your soul.    ❜ ❛    put it on hold.    ❜ ❛    all the signals are sent.    ❜ ❛    it’s not like i’m falling in love.    ❜ ❛    i just want you to do me no good.    ❜ ❛    and you look like you could.    ❜

MAD SOUNDS.

❛    make you feel alright.    ❜ ❛    bring you back to life.    ❜ ❛    run but you cannot hide.    ❜ ❛    you’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do.    ❜

FIRESIDE.

❛    i can’t explain.    ❜ ❛    i want to try.    ❜ ❛    there’s this image of you and i.    ❜ ❛    there’s all these secrets that i can’t keep.    ❜ ❛    not sure if i should show you.    ❜ ❛    has it gone for good    ?    ❜ ❛    is it coming back around    ?    ❜ ❛    make up your mind.    ❜ ❛    you’re losing.    ❜ ❛    all those places we used to go.    ❜ ❛    i suspect you already know.    ❜ ❛    something about it’s changed.    ❜ ❛    i thought i was yours forever.    ❜

WHY’D YOU ONLY CALL ME WHEN YOU’RE HIGH    ?

❛    it’s home time.    ❜ ❛    i’m not finished.    ❜ ❛    you’re not by my side.    ❜ ❛    i was just dreaming.    ❜ ❛    i’m trying to change your mind.    ❜ ❛    are you out tonight    ?    ❜ ❛    i’m running out of time.    ❜ ❛    you’re starting to bore me.    ❜

SNAP OUT OF IT.

❛    what’s been happening in your world    ?    ❜ ❛    what have you been up to    ?    ❜ ❛    i gotta tell you the truth.    ❜ ❛    snap out of it.    ❜ ❛    i left it too late.    ❜ ❛    i’ll be here waiting.    ❜ ❛    it don’t sound much like you.    ❜ ❛    how could you be so blind    ?    ❜

KNEE SOCKS.

❛    i thought you might be mine.    ❜ ❛    you cured my january blues.    ❜ ❛    you made it alright.    ❜ ❛    i was acting like i knew.    ❜ ❛    i had nothing to lose.    ❜ ❛    dreams just aren’t coming true.    ❜ ❛    you and me could have been a team.    ❜ ❛    you could be my baby.    ❜

I WANNA BE YOURS.

❛    you call the shots.    ❜ ❛    i just wanna be yours.    ❜ ❛    secrets i have held.    ❜ ❛    harder to hide than i thought.    ❜

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puppetwithapistol:

I say no worries a lot for someone who worries 101% of the time

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captainmollymelancholy:

inst: sxft.deep 

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abby’s faves of the week [2/5]

 ↳ knuckle down (man man)

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viceinvestigator

listens without interruption,   only moving to caress younger’s rocking elbow, and to push glasses higher on his own forehead so they won’t be in the way.   lopsided smile not disappearing this time once he spots chris’.      “ you get used to the dark.   that’s what you do.   you know moles live in underground holes their entire lives and they seem like they’re doing alright   —–   you just take a page out of their book. ”      fingertips trace a line across the other’s brow, smoothing stray hairs back into tawny mass.   gentle and repetitive.      “ affaire classée.   je gagne   —–   case closed, i win. ”      scraggly teeth bare in uncontrollable smile, only unable to hold back the expression once he’s translated.   lets it sit for a second before saying it again in french slower, in case chris wants to try.   fixing the way sleeves drape on the other’s forearms now that he’s resumed wearing them, just a little tug here and pull there.

“ and an office with your name on the door,   written in gold lettering.   you’ll have your own desk too, and one of those nice swivel chairs, with the big back like in movies.   you can carry gagnant evidence in that briefcase   —–   winning evidence.   even better than a loaded gun, eh ? ”      drops one knee to the ground so he can better focus on chris, and not on making sure he doesn’t sway too far and fall over.      “ i’ve never seen you in a suit before. ”      it’s a quieter, more thoughtful addition.

         ' a mole? dun’trust their hands. ’ chris could hardly focus on dill’s voice - distracted by the soothing fingers on his forehead and dill’s glasses ... especially his glasses. chris felt worried that they’d get tangled in his hair. he decides against mentioning it - if they did get tangled he’d fix it.           ‘ ah -- ah, ’ chris smiles as he tries to mimic the words, ‘ ah-fair ... class ... juh -- juh? ... gah’ ... ’ he’s quiet when the words are repeated - thankful that this time it’s slower. he watches dillon, trying hard to mimic the way his mouth moves. he sits up and lifts his elbows from his knees so that dill’s able to adjust his sweater, ‘ ah - uh? ah or uh? uh’fair class juh gah'n ...yay? gah -- gaaah’nuh’ye ... ’ he nods once he thinks he’s gotten it, looking off to the side for a moment at a pretend colleague, ‘ hey -- hey! yeah, you ... ’ he points at the person he’s made up, ‘ ah’fair class juh - ’ he stops for a moment to look at dill, mostly for reassurance and then turns his attention back to the wall, ‘ gah’n’yay! ’           he moves to face dill again, smiling a big smile - a smile that reached his eyes - at the thought of his own office ... his own briefcase ... his own - ‘ water cooler! in the corner of my office, right by my big potted plant ... with the fancy paper cups ... and, and hot water, too ... just incase any of my clients want tea. ’ he rests a hand on dillon’s shoulder just incase he wobbled on his way - chris didn’t want him to hurt his legs. he squeezes his shoulder once, just ‘cause, before dropping his arm and letting it hang at his side, ‘ no? ’ chris frowns, finally reaching up to adjust dill’s glasses ... just to make sure they weren’t stuck, ‘ i think i’d look pretty official, huh? in a suit? a real one with -- with uh, y’know, all of the layers? a ... ’ he pokes dillon’s chest, ‘ pocket square. ’ 

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team-phoenix-blog:

❝ It’s a great feeling to think that I can be a friend to so many people through my movies. ❞ ― River Phoenix

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pajamasecrets:

I just feel homesick, you know? I’m not the only one, I know that… I just wanna go back. I’m ready to go back. I’m ready to leave whenever you are.

A deleted scene from My Own Private Idaho (1991).