ship-discourse-confessions - Tumblr blog

[ship-discourse-confessions]

I don't know if most people who aren't pro shippers realize this but a lot of us won't post anything even vaguely controversial on our main blogs because we are terrified of the harassment we might face for just liking a piece of media so we sit down shut up and if we want to talk about it we only do it on a dedicated blog or with other proshippers. That's why you'll see blogs that only talk about proship stuff because they have essentially quarantined it from their main blog to avoid being called a pedophile for liking the latest piece of controversial media or shipping two teenagers together or a 17 year old and an 18 year old

exactly, it's to remain anonymous and not lose face to their audience of antis

[ship-discourse-confessions]

So, in the fandom I'm currently in, there's an artist who's tracing other's comics and fanart. She's rightfully getting flack for it, but she's also getting being called a pedophile...why? Because her oc is 33 (like her...yes, she got doxxed) and main characters are 16 - 18 year olds.

It's just...so disheartening. I mean, she's getting shit on more for the shipping than for the tracing. I wish people in the fandom would focus on the real issue...😮‍💨

eugh that really sucks anon. i hate tracers so much.

i do think both of those things can be bad and should be called out from that artist in my opinion, but i can see how it's frustrating for one to be given more focus than the other. especially for people who don't think ships of that nature are a problem.

[ship-discourse-confessions]

you know what i have a confession this time. fuck it

i sent myself some of my asks. if i run a confession blog i should get to confess some things too

feel free to guess which ones are me lmao

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I don't try to ship anything problematic but it happens frequently. I just find two characters two hot and like stuff of them together. God forbid they fuck little bit.

i have no idea when you sent this anon or how long it’s been rotting in my askbox but it’s finally being released. you’re free

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what’s up sluts i’m back

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You should just delete this blog. Your stance on harassment is holier than swiss cheese and you're clearly not mature enough to run a blog like this at all, you literally harbored a blog for hate under the guise of "seeing both sides" and then turned around and act like it was out of your control when you're literally in control of this blog in the first place.

Fixed it :)

awesome, thanks for fixing it :)

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You're literally the biggest hypocrite I've ever seen lmao

okay

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You should just delete this blog. Your stance on harassment is holier than swiss cheese and your clearly not mature enough to run a blog like this at all, you literally harbored a blog for hate under the guise of "seeing both sides" and then turned around and act like it was out of your control when you're literally in control of this blog in the first place.

you're*

[ship-discourse-confessions]

Blog Updates/Future Post I Guess

Yeah this blog is changing. I like being able to run something like this and see what everyone has to say without fear of being identified and seeing what people really think without my input, but I think it's causing me more stress than I need right now.

I'm not going to deactivate the blog, but it's gonna be different going forward. Not a confessions blog anymore, I clearly can't handle that. Askbox is still open if anyone wants to chat I guess, but I'm not a dedicated confessions blog anymore. Blog might die, blog might live, I'm not sure right now. I might change the URL if anyone has any suggestions.

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Hey OP, has this blog and all the asks and stuff you get influenced any of your perspectives on shipping discourse and general media stuff?

Oh, for sure.

I don’t think my opinions on “problematic” media or whatever itself have changed at all, but my opinions on these communities definitely have. Of course, I can’t talk about every single proshipper/anti and I’m generalizing here and this is entirely just from my experience. If it doesn’t fit you, it doesn't fit you.

I don’t really know how to articulate this very well so I’m sorry if this makes no fucking sense.

The communities everyone has built feel so backwards. Going into this, I assumed the community built around problematic media would be centered around said problematic media, but instead, it’s centered around defending it while also never engaging with it at all. It feels so bizarre to me that you’ve created a community around “live and let live, just enjoy the fiction you want to, it doesn’t matter at all actually” and yet 99% of all posts I see from proship blogs is about being proship and not them actually just enjoying their little fictional guys. In my experience, there seems to be more “fictional incest is okay because it’s fiction” posts than “here’s a drawing of some fictional incest, which is okay because it’s just fiction” posts, if that makes sense.

I don’t know, it just feels bad, man. Running this blog has made me significantly less happy, and I don’t really know why anyone would subject themselves to such a soul-crushing community long-term when they don’t even care all that much. I don’t know why someone would run a proship (or anti) blog where you only post about being morally better than the other “side” about your fiction, while also… Never posting or reblogging anything about the fiction you like. It just feels like nobody is happy or posting about the things that make them happy, ever.

I have the opposite problem with antis and proshippers. Antis have some fucked up opinions and I think they’re awful, but at least they don’t post about other shit. It’s possible to enjoy the things an anti has made without being an anti because they don’t exclusively post about being an anti. The #anti and #antiship tags are overrun with crossposts because nobody fuckin uses those hashtags. Antis don’t post under ship discourse tags or search through ship discourse tags or follow blogs exclusively about ship discourse like proshippers do.

I obviously can't speak for anyone else, but from my experience running this blog, it is exhausting constantly surrounding yourself with a community entirely built off of outrage. Of course harassment and bullying are bad and of course we should be anti-harassment. But I feel like that should be the baseline for the community and not everything the community thinks and does.

The term “ignorance is bliss” comes to mind. You don’t have to post about “wow antis sure do suck haha” all the time when you could post about your fictional blorbos instead. Post your blorbos dammit, even if they’re siblings or what the fuck ever, it’ll make you happier than posting about discourse.

Enjoy whatever fiction you want, but at least post about things you enjoy. You can quit posting about discourse if it makes you feel worse, I promise it doesn’t make you an anti I swear.

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I feel like the only way this blog can ethically exist is if there's a basic requirement of civility. If you allow and post "confessions" like "proshippers should be neutered" this blog just becomes a way for ppl to anonymously bully folks.

I'm just gonna post these both together and respond to it all at once. I had to chew on it for a while and I had a meeting, so I'm sorry I didn't respond to your first ask right away.

Under a cut since this got a little long.

I honestly thought that person was being sarcastic. To me, it read very similarly to a lot of the things people were saying about the whole paraphilia thing from a few days ago, the whole "Right, because we should seriously kill people for kids they MIGHT hurt in the FUTURE" sentiment I saw a few people toss around.

But whether they meant it or not, whether they're seriously someone who holds this belief or someone mocking said belief, it's clearly ambiguous enough to hurt people regardless.

Posting that in the profic/proship tags (especially with no trigger warnings) was irresponsible of me and I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry to anyone I hurt, especially since I didn't give you any way to effectively prevent seeing stuff like that.

Honestly, I've been kind of skimming my asks for a few days, ever since the paraphilia shit I mentioned. All of that made me kind of want to vomit and I hated reading anything about it. Everything involved in that was kind of disgusting and there were several asks I genuinely couldn't finish. But...

I really don't like censoring or deleting the things people have to say in my ask box. When I created this blog, it was to post anything and everything I received, with no filter and no censorship (except for personally identifiable/directly targeted asks). Screaming into the void about silly fandom discourse and shipping two characters together. It isn't about which side has good or valid points or makes any sense at all, it's supposed to be cathartic.

I wanted to see what people would say when they knew there was no pressure or expectations to say one thing or the other, that no matter what they said, I'd still post it. Even if the content made me feel sick. Even if it were something I find genuinely immoral.

I completely understand why people wouldn't want these asks up, and especially why they wouldn't want it in the profic tags, which is why I've purged them all from the profic/proship tags. I'm also in the process of adding trigger tags to each post that might be triggering (formatted as "tw: *trigger*" if you want to block them). However, I've been posting things I don't personally agree with and things I genuinely cannot read all the way through, because I specifically don't want to delete anything anyone has sent.

I can delete the more aggressive asks completely and never answer anything like that again, but If I do that, I'll be deleting asks about my personal triggers as well. This means that asks involving discussion of incest, pedophilia, or necrophilia in any depth, real or in media, goes too. If I'm filtering out what people can send me, I'm not going to intentionally trigger myself anymore for this blog.

Or I can keep those posts "up," but with heavy trigger warnings. If I go with this, I'll put them under a cut as well so people have to read the trigger warnings and then click a button to see it.

Again, I'm very sorry for posting that ask in the profic/proship tag where anyone could see it completely unprompted. I need to be more responsible with this going forward, that much is certain. I'm going to leave the route this blog goes up to you all. Please give me your thoughts.

[ship-discourse-confessions]

OKAY

that's every post retagged. the only asks in either anti/proship tags are those where the asker identifies themself as anti/proship.

i'll continue to use this tagging system from now on, so if you want your asks to appear in either tag, please specify in explicit words, otherwise it will go in neither.

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I wish more proshippers could take their own advice of blocking and moving on. I've written vents on my personal blog about how specific tropes/etc are triggering to me and I've gotten people screenshotting them and making fun of me to their followers over me trying to vocalize my triggers. That one event pushed back me healing from that trauma for YEARS. I'm still tryna get over it and ik I'd be in a much better place rn if they'd just fucking blocked and ignored me. I've seen teenagers talking amongst their peers on their personal blogs about being antiship and not liking when ppl write porn abt characters who are minors, and then watched a proshipper barge into their post to call them bookburning nazis. Follow your own goddamn advice and just ignore it.

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I don't know how the idea that you can enjoy things in fiction that you don't condone in reality is something anyone can disagree with.

One of my favourite fictional characters is a murderer. Obviously I don't condone murder irl. How is that different to enjoying problematic ships?

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[ship-discourse-confessions]

I hate how antis, when making a call out for a predator who's a proshipper, they tend to put if they ship minor/adult ships or are into lolisho before the crimes they've commited. Let's be honest if someone has actually groomed a minor, it should been the first thing to see in the callout, the rest is comes after. Obviously not every single anti does this, but I've seen it multiple times...

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Can we, both proshippers and antis, agree that cross tagging is annoying as fuck and shouldn't be done unless it's a very serious matter?

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https://www.tumblr.com/ship-discourse-confessions/740505880687263744/httpswwwtumblrcomship-discourse-confessions7

Anon, you misunderstood (some of) my words. I didn't meant it in "I don't believe antis cuz they don't have proofs" kind of way, I worded it wrong.

Let me try to explain better what I meant:

Some here and then (on Twitter atleast), certain antis share screenshots of things proshippers have send them (like death or SA threaths), but will censor/cut the @ of the account that send those things. I thought it felt it weird due how they're fine with telling people they're being harassed without telling who. I don’t get why, it just feels more that those screenshots are sent by a friend and that the whole thing is just trying to make proshippers look worse.

Again, not all antis do this! My intention wasn’t to go "I don't believe you if you don't have proofs" to antis, it was more of a weird suspicion I had. Because I don't understand why would you censor the @ of your harasser when your in a community that has no problem of sharing the @s of proshippers to avoid them.

For my second point, I have to admit it was very fucking stupid of me and I'm sorry for that. I didn't actually thought of how it could have been triggering, so I admit being in the wrong here.

My intention wasn’t to act as if what antis say is not worth believing by defaults, I was just trying to bring more light to something I've notice. That's why I said "some, but not all" antis.

I hope this clears more what I said.

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