sic-fayl

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 17

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

And now it's time for what you're here for!

#02. The Guy Next Door

“You’re really staring at that cafe, you know? You need a coffee or something?”

“No, I just...”

‘…He’s not at the counter?’

Yeo-woon glanced one more time past the cafe’s glass front, then turned away as he licked his lips.

They’d been checking out all kinds of viewable apartments in the neighborhood and the next one happened to be right by the cafe he’d just stared into. When Yeo-woon left Seon-yong’s car, he’d been surprised to see these familiar surroundings and he’d instantly had a good feeling about this apartment. The outside of the building looked nice too, not too old or anything, and so Yeo-woon wanted this to be the place that worked out for him.

They first had to visit the local real estate building, to collect the manager responsible for the place. When Yeo-woon told them he was here to see the apartment, they asked “Wasn’t that planned for the afternoon? How comes you’re here so early?” and Seon-yong poked Yeo-woon in the side for that, looking confused as well. Should we come back later, his eyes seemed to say, but Yeo-woon just subtly shook his head. They were here earlier than planned because now that he’d seen the surroundings of the apartment, he didn’t want to waste another second, too worried someone else might get ahead of him. And if they’d just leave again now, it might also look unprofessional, like Yeo-woon couldn’t remember what plans he’d made or something. He didn’t want to risk them viewing him in a bad light and not getting the apartment because of that.

“I’m really sorry, something important has come up and so I can’t make it this afternoon. Could we maybe go view it now instead?”

“Oh? Okay, then.”

Thankfully, the apartment had no tenant at the moment, so they could indeed take a look at the place right away. It was on the top floor and the moment the three of them entered, they could see the bright living room, with natural light from its wide windows casting half the room in a warm glow.

“You’re so lucky.”

That was whispered to Yeo-woon as soon as they entered, by his friend who’d spent the last five years living in all kinds of different apartments. The building was pretty new, and for the first time all day, the apartment actually fulfilled all requirements that Yeo-woon had written down beforehand, for what he’d ideally want in an apartment: At least two rooms, if not more, and no semi-basement either. Ideally close to a station and no restaurant in the ground floor. An elevator for sure and bright rooms, with as much natural light as possible.

Out of all the places they’d viewed, he definitely liked this one the most. There probably wouldn’t be another place this perfect for rent anywhere around these parts, that’s what Yeo-woon assumed. He’d gone through something like this before one time, when he’d found the ideal place, just a 5 minute walk away from his university, but then someone else had snatched up the apartment, just 10 minutes before Yeo-woon himself called to rent it. He never again wanted to go through a loss like that and so he now transferred what money he had to the real estate manager, making a preliminary deposit to guarantee he’d get the place.

‘Is this real? Things are working out so well for me…’

He actually felt a bit unsure about it all, because he’d stepped out to call a moving company right away and they just so happened to have an empty time-slot for him, as if through some divine intervention.

“Huh? Next week already?”

“Yeah, The moving company apparently had some plans fall through with a pair of newlyweds. Seems the bride suddenly reconnected with her first love on her wedding day and she eloped with him. And from the way it sounded, that was the groom’s older brother.”

“Wow, that’s… great for you.”

“So that’s when I’ll move now.”

“Really? Just like that and in just a week?”

“Yep, so keep that weekend free! We’ll need to do some clean up.”

“...You’re such a shameless bastard...”

Instead of answering, Yeo-woon was already moving towards the stairwell again, to make another call. Though… he’d admit that he had just blindly accepted the moving date and only checked it after the call, to see it would be next Saturday. He just couldn’t shake the feeling that something had been planned for that weekend already... So he felt a bit uneasy, wondering if he’d forgotten something, but he decided to ignore that for now, in favor of immediately telling his parents about his upcoming move. He got scolded by his mother for a bit, who complained “What crazy kid just puts down a deposit, before all the documents are in order?”, but in the end he still left that call feeling good.

“Seon-yong, time to go! Haha, Mom even told me she’ll lend me some money until I get my deposit back.”

He skipped back over to Seon-yong, now that his phone call was over. But at his friend's shocked expression, Yeo-woon stilled and cocked his head.

“What’s up?”

“The person next door just got home...”

“...?”

Seemed like his future neighbor had come up through the elevator, while Yeo-woon had been talking with his parents in the stairwell. And now Seon-yong gave him a play-by-play of what happened, while bursting into laughter throughout the explanation.

“So, he asked if I was gonna move in and when. And so I said ‘a friend of mine, but the next weekend’, right?”

“Mhm.”

“And I even smiled and tried to be all nice and stuff. But the dude just got all grumpy and said ‘On that weekend? Why?’ and then he left.”

“Okay?”

“And then he slammed his door so goddamn hard, I thought it was gonna fall off its hinges. People, man, you just innocently try to be nice to them and they repay you by trying to cause a shockwave with their front door, in an attempt to end you...”

“It is a bit strange.”

“Just be careful, Yeo-woon. You can’t trust that future neighbor of yours.”

“You sure you didn’t just scare him off with your smile? Remember, your nephew cries every time he sees it too.”

Seon-yong was already someone with a rather harsh face, but whenever he smiled, he’d look truly intimidating. That was just another reason for why he’d been unsuccessful so far, in his quest to earn his four-year-old nephew’s adoration.

“Little Haejin is just naturally a bit of a scaredy-cat, alright?”

“Strange, could’ve sworn he’s only ever been scared of your face...”

“Hey!”

Seon-yong responded by muttering out his own endless list of arguments, along with squeezing Yeo-woon’s collar and pretending to shake him in his annoyance. Yeo-woon only listened to the long-familiar words with half an ear, unquestioningly nodding along. He was more just thinking about what Seon-yong had said about his neighbor.

Yeo-woon had lived in a dorm with four other people before and semi-basements too. Sometimes, in all his moves, he’d also met neighbors that seemed concerningly shady, or even neighbors who could have easily been mistaken for the main villain in some tragic drama. Maybe that’s why, in the end, something as cute as a little door-slam left Yeo-woon as unconcerned as he’d been before.

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 16

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Now, here's the next part!

Title: Omg! Someone’s finally dealing with that hacker guild

Written by: AlwaysFilial [Night Spear]

Look up ‘strawberry jam’ and you’ll find the post by their guild master about the whole thing!

Doesn’t look like a ranked guild, but they sure got balls.

They’re straight up calling them hackers.

(15 comments)

-Strawberry Jam will even livestream the match! So hack guild will probs have a ton of members eat some sweet sweet bans lol ^^

⤷Gonna camp out there jic so I won’t miss the best moment of this year.

⤷lmaoooo Kinda want that to happen rn lol They should’ve been eating bans for ages already

-Motsuena and Earth Star are regular Top 50, so they’re obvious, but who are the others? Are they just there to add numbers?

⤷Kittycat MeowMeowMeow = Wolfist who hacks his damage higher, neutaaaa = No clue tbh…? Was hanging around Poseidon a lot, so I thought they’d join Poseidon, but here they’re suddenly with the others??? Wild

-That synergy is wild tho haha. One side has Gunner+Shadow Warrior, so close range and long range - they’re winning already. Especially with Dead Job+Night Spear on the other side... Like, NS busts enemy camps and does good close range damage, but against both close+long range, there’s no way. Like, they have no chance, you seeing this? And with both sides without healer, that gap becomes insurmountable. Gunners can even regenerate some health when they do damage, so it’s an invaluable job here.

⤷Don’t call Wolfist dead job ㅜㅜ That term’s already taken by the class’ final job: Valkyries (aka trash) lol.

⤷ But that Earth Star kid has awful stats outside of speed, so all it takes is one hit and he’ll be a pancake.

Title: [Popular Post] I went on a deep dive to understand why they’re actually fighting.

Written by: Anonymous

Click here for ‘[Popular Post] Come watch those hackers go down! - True Strawberry Jam vs. Hack Poseidon Match’ (direct link: www.illusions2.net/board_10311124)

This is about a bigger situation!! So read that other post first, to understand this!!

So, first things first, I really think hackers should just eat their rightful bans and screw off already. Hacks suck and ruin the balance of everything and it’s so lazy and leads to problems for everyone. It’s the worst! But I’m also still kinda a newb, so I tried to read explanations, but I still don’t get what hacks really are or do haha.

(Duel_Mail.jpg)

Anyways, the point is I thought this was one of those normal matches, where people just fight for the fun of it. But I mean, it’s not a guild match, so there’s less happening and that’s kinda boring, so I asked myself: if it’s just for fun, then why choose the 2v2 that’s objectively less fun lol. Or is that just me?

Now, the reason the community board is overrun with this match is just because Strawberry Jam said they’ll stream it all lol.

And I guess even the Game Masters are curious enough to turn into voyeurs now? So, GMs, if you’re reading this, please improve the Moon Fairy in your next patch, you heartless bastards!

But anyways:

Click here for ‘[Popular Post] Come watch those hackers go down! - True Strawberry Jam vs. Hack Poseidon Match’ (direct link: www.illusions2.net/board_10311124)

If you scroll to the comments, do you see how most are from Earth Star (the speed hacker) and Captain Poseidon (their guild master)? There’s like 3 pages of them.

(Comments_evidence_caught.jpg)

Lmaoooo

I’ve decided I’ll let Earth have his redemption arc, if they win. I mean, I hope they lose, because watching people get what’s coming for them is really nice... But they say here they want their ‘baby’ back, if they win.

Huh? What baby? I kept checking the comments to try and figure that out and the screenshots below hold the answer lmaoo.

In conclusion: neutaaaa = their baby

I’m- LMAOOOO So who exactly is neutaaaa? Possibly one of only two girls in the strawberry jam guild. Here’s a screenshot and they’re the one right below Motsuena lol.

(Screenshot_011.jpg)

I’ve heard they hung out with Poseidon for like a month and that guild helped them level up, so that’s probably why, when you go through all the screenshots Poseidon has added in the comments of the other post, there’s a lot with them just hanging out together in all kinds of different places. But we’re talking about the guild infamous for hating newbies, so what gives? Like, they even helped raise their level... Well, maybe it’s actually a member’s alt account, or an irl friend of someone? I’m not sure, so let’s skip ahead.

(Screenshot_005.jpg)

Here. That’s the thing that made me write this entire post.

A week before the screenshot you just saw, Earth Star actually sold out his ‘baby’ and got him murdered in the guild zone lmao. Like, look at this... Like, what even… What was even happening here-

(Screenshot_015.jpg)

ANYWAYS;;;; It gets even funnier ㅜㅜㅜㅜ TT TT Earth Star and neutaaaa~ sitting in a tree~? (As you can see, it’s a screenshot of Earth Star confessing to neutaaaa, which I personally got from the Poseidon guild member Halloween Eggplant! Thanks again, Halloween Eggplant, this is amazing^^)

Strawberry Jam’s reason to fight: Down with the hackers!

Poseidon’s reason to fight: Let’s rescue our child!

lmao

LMAO

ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

PFFFF-

No clue how they lost their ‘child’ but… It’s so funny to watch; No clue if they’re good to each other either, but it’s just hilarious to me that a couple can join opposing guilds and then it jumpstarts a fight like this.

Tbh I’d love to see Earth lose and implode, but the GMs are blind bastards who’ll only get rid of him when they see for themselves that he’s hacking. Lol. I just want it to be the weekend already, so I can watch that livestream~

(315 comments)

-lmaooooo I love this new pov, it’s so refreshing.

-Isn’t that the infamous Poseidon ‘Hacker Dogs’ Guild? How’d it get so large??

⤷Well, hacking’s become more widespread recently.

⤷⤷Then shouldn’t the devs take out that guild already?

⤷⤷⤷Lmaooo GMs doing their jobs, you’re funny.

-I was there when they were fighting in the guild zone. Kinda wondered what was going on, but never would’ve guessed this lmaoo. Earth Star started this fight too, right? Think it’s only because his lover got lured into another guild?

⤷But why hire ppl to kill your lover if you’re dating??

⤷⤷Isn’t that exactly why? Seems obvious

⤷⤷⤷The adrenaline rush of losing your hard earned exp points.

- Guys, where’d you find the hacks they’re using?? Can I be Top 50 too, if I use those hacks??ᄋ0ᄋ

⤷Hah, kids these days really know how to make me cringe about my hacking phase

⤷Just search the forums a bit.

⤷Checked profile - born in 2012… Just crawl back into the womb pls

⤷⤷Hey... I know now I should’ve looked around by myself first, but don’t you think you could learn from this too? You’re so harsh... Have you never been 12 yourself?

⤷⤷⤷Lmaooooo Yep, I’ve never been 12 a day in my life ㅠㅠ

⤷⤷⤷⤷Stop bullying them... Poor cutie patootie has no clue what they stumbled into

-At what time they gonna stream?

⤷Can’t tell either haha

⤷During the weekend, you moron

⤷⤷Thanks for nothing, fellow moron.

-Kinda off topic, but that’s the Holy Waterfalls map, right? ㅜㅜ But you can’t actually stand on its clouds, unless you’re a Moon Fairy... How did Earth Star do that?

⤷??? Oh, damn you’re right

⤷Isn’t there an invisible ledge?

⤷⤷Wait really? Brb gonna check

⤷⤷⤷Woah, I read these comments, so I gave it a go and there’s really an invisible spot in one cloud haha. Maybe it’s a bug.

⤷⤷⤷⤷The holy waterfalls are suddenly full of people looking for that one spot. Guys, let’s stop flooding the place ^^; I’ll leave now too

-That neu-dude looks like such a noob... He allergic to cosmetics? Or is there no hack for them? God, I wanna send him a ticket so he’ll at least go fix the eyes. They’re so plain, it hurts~ㅜ ㅜ

⤷You’ve legit made me curious if there’s any aestetic hacks out there.

⤷Doesn’t the earth guy dress all extra on purpose and then just drag around the plain guy to stand out more?

⤷⤷Confirmed attention whore frᄃᄃ

-I think the nnewb is actually a LilFor refugee lol. Kids running around in that cheap-ass cape always are lmao. Apparently it was some kinda status symbol in LilFor. So now they still use it here lol.

⤷lmfaooooooooo

⤷Used to play Little Forest too, but never heard of that lol.

⤷lmaoooo checks out.

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 15

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Now, have fun reading!

Ding!

His black phone screen lit up with a sound he couldn’t identify. There was a message from some app he couldn’t place either. For a moment, Yeo-woon just stared at the icon, feeling lost, until it finally clicked that this was the Whole Blue app he’d installed some time ago and so he tapped his way to the message.

[Earth: Newt?]

Below today’s date, there was that message and another one with a question about where Yeo-woon was. Maybe the app showed that he’d seen the messages, or maybe it just showed that he was writing a reply, but either way, the little ‘...’ icon, indicating Earth Star had been typing, had disappeared. Seemed like Earth Star was patiently waiting for his response.

[I’m outside?]

[Earth: I really think you best go home right now.]

‘Ah, why am I shaking now? Has something big happened?’

[Earth: You’re not busy, are you?]

‘So something did happen!’

Feeling nervous, Yeo-woon stopped in his tracks, not caring that this meant he was standing in the middle of the road, and one-handedly tapped away on his phone.

[Is something wrong?]

[Earth: Yes!! Your level is so low, it’s so concerning!!!]

[Oh noes…]

Well then. Nothing to worry about after all. Yeo-woon swiped away the app and kept on walking. Now that he’d finally taken out all the trash that had piled up in his place over the past week, he felt better.

So he walked back to his apartment with a skip in his step, hands blessedly free, but once his phone connected to his wi-fi, he received a slew of messages all at once. There was a seemingly endless vibration coming from his phone, along with a lot of dinging noises, all sounding in quick succession. A bit dumbfounded, Yeo-woon took out his phone to check out whatever Earth Star had spammed him with.

[Earth: Btw that Jam guild actually delivered.]

[Earth: (photo)]

[Earth: They sent the plans for the 2V2 just now, but somehow I doubt they consulted you on those ><]

[Earth: The plan is three games next weekend. You got time then?]

[Earth: ㅜㅜ Did you block me?]

Now that it’d reached him, Yeo-woon checked the photo Earth Star had sent. It was a partial screenshot of a message in Illusion, clearly sent from Strawberry to Earth Star.

[Received mail]

Sender: Strawberry

Title: Pvp info

Weve discussed the pvp in our guild so heres the deets.

Fyi we chose ur fighters based on whos got the most hacking allegations lol.

*WHEN*

Either sat or sun next weekend - u decide n tell us

*FIGHT DEETS*

2v2 - 8 minutes - best 2 out of 3 rounds

So u win twice, u win it all

And if we get a draw bc of time limit, we restart that round until we get a winner

*FIGHTERS*

Poseidon: Ji9Star / Kittycat MeowMeowMeow

Strawberry Jam: Motsuena / neutaaaa

N we decided Motsuenas gonna livestream it all to prove whats really going on.

If u dont wanna get exposed n banned just dont use hacks for once. Fight urself instead of letting some program do all the work for u.^^

Nearly everything looked good. The only problem was Yeo-woon’s name being listed as one of the fighters. He tried to rub his eyes for a bit, hoping it was just a weird hallucination, but the words refused to change.

[Wait, but why am I…?]

Yeo-woon had assumed he would just be a witness to the fight, nothing more, so now he squeezed his eyes shut, feeling too confused to look at the damning words any longer.

[Earth: Guess you were the only one around Cat’s level lol.]

[Earth: You’re both not on the final jobs of your classes yet and they probably assumed that me and a low-level cat vs two actual 200s would be too unbalanced or something. Lol.]

Even though it had seemed to Yeo-woon like Strawberry Jam had sent their guild-invite at random, same as how he’d accepted it on a whim too, he’d since realized that they had no members below level 200. In general, it was a strong guild with many things to offer its members, so the more he’d thought about it all, the more confused Yeo-woon became about why they’d asked him specifically to join, out of all possible players. In other news, he’d also learned that Kittycat Meowmeowmeow was still a student and so his gaming time was limited to the evening, which meant he couldn’t level up very quickly and so it could still be a long time, before he’d eventually reach level 200.

“That makes sense...”

‘If that’s why, then I kind of get it. But still, you could have told me all of that, so I wouldn’t have to hear it from Earth Star!’

The fact was, Yeo-woon had never fought in any official PvP matches before, in his time playing Illusion, so he felt like he desperately needed all the practice he could get, before the next weekend would roll around.

[Earth: And I’ve even got a deal where, when I win the PVP (because let's be real: I will), I’ll get something from Strawberry Jam.]

[Earth: And theoretically, all this started because of you, so it’s only fair I now get to do what I want, right?]

[? I guess, sure]

Earth Star seemed happy with that answer, even screenshotting it and showing off the screenshot to Yeo-woon. He said he’d put it in cloud-save, so there was no way to lose it or for the message to be altered. Yeo-woon had no clue why his simple answer had caused this kind of response in Earth Star, much less why he kept telling him about it.

[Earth: If you get the 3rd job change done today, we should be able to level you up a bit more easy peasy and then we can get to farming the Couple Dungeon this week already...]

From a stranger’s perspective, Earth Star looked like the type of person who lived his life without any plan whatsoever, just going from random impulse to random other impulse, but behind the scenes, he seemed to actually plan a lot of things about how best to play the game. Yeo-woon had taken to mindlessly going wherever Earth Star lead them and completing any quests he pointed him towards and just like that, he was leveling up faster than ever before.

[Earth: When you gonna be on today?]

“Oh, today...”

It’d be hard to find time today. Yeo-woon was out, looking at different potential apartments he could rent, in an effort to find a place closer to his new work. He’d planned to get home very late at night and just claim his daily rewards before going to bed, but confronted with Earth Star’s enthusiasm, he felt like maybe he should get back a little earlier than that.

[I’ve got some stuff to take care of, so I’ll be out until evening.]

[Earth: When exactly?]

Yeo-woon thought through his plans for the day. He condensed them as tight as he could and then added how long it’d take to get back home and finally, he typed the point in time all of that left him with, thinking it seemed vaguely doable.

[8? Probably?]

[Earth: Hmm...]

Earth Star only sent that non-answer and then disappeared. Probably back to gaming, Yeo-woon assumed, or whatever else Earth Star did in his free time. Anyway, no point in texting him further, if he was satisfied with Yeo-woon’s answer.

Seon-yong: Lee Yeo-woon, I got stuck in traffic and there’s no way I’ll get to you on time.

Seon-yong: Just keep waiting, go sit around for another half an hour or so

- Only if you go screw yourself first ^^

Seon-yong: ;; I’m coming to give him a free ride and he treats me like this, what a friend... So, you gonna wait? And write a real answer, not just a letter

- Ok~!

Seon-yong: And now with the gratefulness I deserve

- 👍~!♡

Seon-yong: A full-on maniac, I swear...

‘If anyone else could see this, they’d run to defend you, all because of some ride. But tell me, who’s the one paying for your lunch and dinner today, huh?’

Yeo-woon huffed a quiet laugh as he washed his hands. Then he sat on the cabinet in his hallway that he kept his shoes in and boredly looked through mail he’d already looked through. That’s when a new thought snuck up on him.

‘But wait, Cat is a student and that’s why he can’t be online in the morning. But Earth Star is still a student too, just in college, right? So why is he logged in at random times, like he’s got no lectures at all?’

Thankfully, that’s when his phone chimed, distracting him enough that he forgot about all that again, because Seonyong had arrived and it was time to go check out some apartments.

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 14

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

(Also small warning: This time I did way stronger "chat speak" (aka no apostrophes, shortened words, "u" instead of "you") for some new characters than I ever did in previous chapters! If that bothers you, send me a message about it and I'll reverse that!)

Now, onto the story!

As Yeo-woon scrolled through some walkthroughs for different levels of Dungeons, just casually waiting for the others to come back, a strange invite-notification appeared on his screen that he’d never seen before.

‘Strawberry (Lv.218) invited you to join their Guild [Strawberry Jam]! Do you want to accept?’

[Whispering] Strawberry: U afk?

“…who are you?”

A player named Strawberry had suddenly popped up beside him, with a fully customized character that showed off a lot of green skin. Some blue scales were scattered throughout, maybe in an effort to make the character look more snake-like. Outside of the Poseidon guild, Yeo-woon didn’t know any players and it seemed a bit weird to him that some random person above level 200 would just invite him into their guild, especially since it didn’t seem to be a new guild or one meant for beginning players. Yeo-woon accidentally brushed one of the arrow keys on his keyboard for a moment, making his character exit his idle state.

[Whispering] Strawberry: Oh so ur not afk.

[Whispering] Strawberry: U don’t have a guild above ur head n we got space.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Just like that...?

[Whispering] Strawberry: Our guild’s level 10 so wanna join?

“…?”

Having a guild... Wouldn’t that be a nice thing? Yeo-woon really thought about it. It’d definitely be better than going without a guild, as he currently was. He’d never been approached like this before either, so he wasn’t sure what to do next.

[Whispering] Strawberry: If u join I’ll share some useful facts 2.

“Facts?”

Useful facts. Immediately, he accepted the invite.

Black fog surrounded him for a moment, covering up his character and then a message appeared that stated he’d successfully joined the guild.

‘I finally have a guild as well.’

Just looking at the little guild icon next to his name, which was a nice star-shape, left Yeo-woon feeling both proud and happy.

[Guild] Strawberry: Found s/one.

[Guild] OneAndOnly: Heyo~

[Guild] Motsuena: Hi there~ ^^

[Guild] neutaaaa: Hello

Multiple guild members greeted him upon joining. Considering this guild wasn’t famous and had open spots, it still had a surprisingly good guild effect that Yeo-woon would happily take advantage of. With this effect he’d be able to darm experience even faster than with his old ghost guild he used to be in and he was amazed by the fact that they even had some crops planted, in the guild’s dedicated farm area.

[Guild] Motsuena: So what’s your age anyway?

[Guild] Motsuena: And are you a lady? Or a guy?

‘But hey, you better be careful though. I heard there’s loads of scammers on the internet nowadays, so you don’t just share your info with them all willy-nilly.’

That’s what Yeo-woon suddenly recalled a friend of his saying, who never played any games himself. Seemed like he’d been right about what he’d told Yeo-woon.

[Guild] neutaaaa: That’s a secret?

[Guild] Motsuena: If it’s a secret, then you must be a lady~ haha

[Guild] neutaaaa: No?

[Guild] Motsuena: You mean yes~ haha

[Guild] Motsuena: If you need anything, don’t be afraid to ask me ^^

[Guild] neutaaaa: I’m fine actually, there’s already some people helping me!

[Guild] Motsuena: Ohh~ haha

Crazy people existed in all kinds of places and this guild was no exception, thanks to that person.

‘Way too forward…’

Yeo-woon decided he’d just focus on other things for now.

[Whispering] Strawberry: Ppl helping u?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: About earlier... What’s those facts you were offering?

[Whispering] Strawberry: U curious? Lol

[Whispering] neutaaaa: ? You said you’d give me the facts.

Strawberry hopped on top of Yeo-woon and then shot at each of the Poseidon members from there, who were still stuck in their idle animations, afk as before. Since they weren’t in the guild zone, none of them took any damage.

[Whispering] Strawberry: U close to them? Lol

In response to that simple question, Yeo-woon’s mind started to race.

‘I’d say we’re close by now.’

‘…But what if that’s only me? They’re all just helping me because Earth made them, and Earth is only keeping me around because there’s something in it for himself. So, even if I feel close to them and laugh with them, can we really be considered all that close yet?’

[Whispering] Strawberry: So do u? Lol

[Whispering] neutaaaa: No, I mean...

[Whispering] neutaaaa: They’re just helping me sometimes.

[Whispering] Strawberry: Looool knew it!

[Whispering] Strawberry: Thought u kno nothing n thats y ur w/ that guild.

Judging by that message, there seemed to be some kind of history between Strawberry and Poseidon. And there was no way to mistake it for a positive history either.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: ?? Wdym?

[Whispering] Strawberry: U rlly dunno? Theyre all hackers.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Oh. Really?

Every game had some hackers. But Yeo-woon still felt shaken because he would’ve never assumed Poseidon to be like that. To hack meant to use a hacking program in the game, so that its basic code could be changed and things could be made way easier for the player. When a skill had a very small radius, but suddenly did damage in a way bigger area and when it was hard to land a headshot because of a really far distance, but one player still landed headshot after headshot anyway... it was normal to ask ‘How is that even possible?’ and in most cases, it was thanks to hacks.

[Whispering] Strawberry: Just look up Poseidon on the community/bulletin board n ull find it lol.

The community board in question updated incredibly quickly and had a whole subsection for game bugs that was so frustrating to see, Yeo-woon had long ago decided to just stay away from it in general. He’d only ever accessed the walkthrough and guides community board, so now he was left to stare at his screen in silence. That’s when CroakRush started to move. The second Strawberry noticed that, they disappeared like they’d never been there at all.

[Party] CroakRush: Woah wait Newt when’d you join another guild?? Waa

“….”

‘Are these guys actually hackers? No way.’

[Party] CroakRush: Huh is no one back yet?

[Party] CroakRush: Ah I tried to be all quick and for what ㅜㅜ

[Whispering] Strawberry: Theres more than just the hacking. Look it up n ull see.

“….”

‘So it’s really true?’

Yeo-woon switched to his internet browser, immediately going to one of his bookmarked pages. It was the community board hosted on Illusion’s official webpage and from here, he wrote ‘Poseidon’ into the search bar.

Title: Hacking? (pictures inside)

Written by: (Anonymous)

There’s this level 170 Wolfist who just solo fought a monster in a level 200 area and still beat it pretty easy. I’ve been crunching the numbers and I’m not sure if that’s possible. For proof, I even took a pic of the hit lmao.

(Athene_server_hacking.jpg)

The equipment info was private, so idk, but I don’t think you can get that number even if you have all your equipment on max for that level. Tbf it’s not a constant thing, but they still hit numbers that high multiple times while I watched.

Isn’t it weird to get numbers like these that even a solo-target dps would struggle to get, when Wolfist is meant for multi-target damage? I asked some people who understand the numbers better and they all said it’s gotta be hacks, so I thought I’d ask here.

I even tried to look up everything and calculate it myself with the skill’s damage equation and I added all the boosts the ideal equipment for a Wolfist would grant them, based on what equipment options people recommend for Wolfists. My results were that a low-level Wolfist like this, when attacking this specific monster’s defense, can land critical hits that do around 500,000 damage as long as we ignore the monster’s resistences, the equipment’s optional sub-stats, them maybe taking some kind of huge boosting potion, or getting boosted by some other player’s skill, right?

But I mean, this wasn’t an attack against some low-level slime, it was a level 170 player hitting a level 200 monster and so I’m not sure if all that stuff even matters, because no one should be able to do a casual 4 million like this, right?

Or do slimes and level 200 monsters share the same defense these days lmao?

And that player is Poseidon, right? Feels like I keep having nightmares about those guys even while awake.

(4 comments)

-Poseidon being Poseidon lol.

-Is there a max damage in this game and will anyone ever reach it?

-What if it’s a weapon with a really high luck sub-stat though?

⤷If you keep raising that luck stat by crazy amounts, probably selling your soul to get the right equipment... Then yeah, could be realistic numbers, but then again, do you see how often those hits are high af? Even a solid luck stat only gives you occasional hits, so for this to be an actual thing, they’d need so much luck it hurts.

The character shown in the post was Kittycat MeowMeowMeow. It had been written yesterday, in the early morning, and it made it obvious that Kittycat MeowMeowMeow had been fighting his way through a level 200 area all by himself. There were many more posts like that one, at least one every week and each showcased another Poseidon member, saying they must be a hacker.

Title: Athene server Looking for a guild? [Poseidon] <<Avoid them

Written by: (Anonymous)

I wasted my time. I’m actually crying, fuck... And I’m not even the only one... If you gotta look for a new guild, don’t waste your time on this one, they’re not even worth the time you’ll waste on them haha...haa; If you wanna join a guild for the upcoming event, DO NOT go with Poseidon ^^

(Guildchat_censored_bastards_caught.jpg)

I just asked everyone politely if they used hacks and which ones and two people who’d joined at the same time as me and wanted to know too and kept asking, but then they got kicked from the guild... There’s this one hacker they have who talks really fast and intensely and so I couldn’t even defend myself, I just kept writing and deleting stuff until I got kicked and blocked as well;;; I got so angry about it all that I told my father he should’ve send me to a better school as a kid, to learn better speaking and now he keeps scolding me for being an unfilial child...

(In-game_report.jpg)

Bastards. And all of this just because I heard some rumors and had questions? People keep talking about it everywhere. If everyone tells you you’re in a hacker guild, isn’t it normal to ask about it? I just wanted to know, but he got so furious, I’m pretty sure now what’s going on with that guild... If they’d just been honest, I wouldn’t have even minded it;; But they treated me so bad, I hope they fall apart. No clue how many reports I got out before they blocked me, but now I’m banned from chat for a whole month ㅠㅠ

Aah, why did they also have to kick the others who were just curious, when I’m the one who actually brought it up in the first place? If you wanted someone to pay, just go for me directly... I’m so sorry, so fucking sorry ㅜㅜ

(104 comments)

-What’s with this guild and its constant drama? People should just check beforehand what weirdo guild they’re joining.

-? Where tldr lol

⤷Welp, have fun with your miserably short attention span and bye bye~

-lmfaooooo That screenshot is comedy gold “Y’all are so powerful, what hacks you using for that? Haha” Lmaoooo That wasn’t a joke either, was it?

⤷Lol well, actually, you were right, I was just making a joke...

-So if there’s whole guilds of hackers now, then why aren’t we cracking down more on the hacking issue? Isn’t this worse than any game-breaking bug the devs could cause? I mean, at least with bugs, they fix them asap lol. But these hacks legit ruin the balance of the entire game.

-They’re still harassing you? ㅠㅠ Seems like they were all hackers and you the only exception lol so they just didn’t want you to figure out what they were doing.

⤷No... Go back to the picture, I was a part of that group chat...ㅠㅠ But I was a really new member, so I stayed silent for the most part, to not get involved any further, but now I’m wondering if they would’ve admitted their hacking, if I had spoken up in their defense and I wanna cry all over again.

⤷⤷If they hadn’t kicked this guy, he’d now happily be using hacks right alongside them lmfao.

The screenshot showed the poster writing with Earth Star in the Guild chat. Earth Star had first replied with laughter and asked where the poster had heard bullshit like that from, to which the poster had responded ‘But you’re clearly using speed hacks though?’ and then had gotten verbally eviscerated by Earth Star, before the poster finally got kicked from the guild. As he looked at the screenshots, Yeo-woon couldn’t help comparing them to his own first encounter. On a hunch, he switched back to the game, taking a screenshot of his chat with Strawberry just in case.

[Whispering] Strawberry: I even know one of them a bit haha.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Oh, really?

[Whispering] Strawberry: Yep so don’t get close.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Thanks for telling me... ᄃᄃ

[Whispering] Strawberry: Huh? Ur our cute guildnewb now so ofc ofc dw.

He was grateful to have learned about it all, but even still, he didn’t want to make his decision based on the words of only one side of this conflict.

‘What if I... Well, what if I say something and Earth Star lays into me like he did into that poster?’

But Yeo-woon was worried that maybe he’d only grown to like these people because they were so kind and helpful towards him.

He kept hesitating on what he should do next, until even Captain Poseidon and Earth Star had made their own returns. All three Poseidon members were jumping around Yeo-woon, or running in sharp little circles, like they were trying to summon him with a ritualistic dance. As soon as Yeo-woon gently pushed one of his arrow keys, moving his character and thereby exiting his own idle state, CroakRush used his skill to increase all of their defenses, together.

“….”

‘Okay, let’s not avoid it any longer, let’s ask them! Confronting things head on is best, so just ask!’

[Party] neutaaaa: Do you guys use hacks?

[Party] Captain Poseidon: What?

[Party] CroakRush: ?

[Party] Ji9Star: ㅡㅡ???

Yeo-woon watched their reactions happen in real time and he really felt like he’d messed up.

[Party] neutaaaa: If not, I’m really sorry. It’s just that while you were gone, I met a player and they told me that...

[Party] neutaaaa: So I just thought I’d ask

[Party] neutaaaa: That’s all

[Party] CroakRush: No one in Poseidon is a hacker...

[Party] Ji9Star: Who told you that?

He wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to tell Earth Star, but then again, there was no real reason not to. It’s not like that person had told him to stay quiet and Poseidon’s members seemed to already know about the rumors anyway.

[Party] neutaaaa: The GM of the guild I joined...

[Party] CroakRush: Fucking loser can’t even believe there’s people with actual skills playing this game... Why pretend like you know everything about everyone when you’re just a clueless fucking moron

[Party] CroakRush: Ah wait jic: I’m talking about that gm not you New!

[Party] Ji9Star: I even told them it’s not hacks and made a whole video, but then they just argued “it’s not fullscreen - fake” so my money is on one of those douches.

[Party] Ji9Star: Guess they can’t feel good about themselves unless they call hacks on everyone who knows how to actually play a character great! ><

[Party] Ji9Star: But Strawberry Jam? << Who dis? Never heard of them.

Which side was telling the truth? Everyone else said it was hacks, but the players in question said it wasn’t. In all honesty, Yeo-woon wanted to believe them more than some random people. Because in the end, the only true ties were ones forged in school or by blood. Even though, technically speaking, neither option applied to these three people.

[Party] Captain Poseidon: I really should have sent the guild invite before I left.

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Earth even asked in our group chat, if I could just invite Newta to the guild already.

“…?”

[Party] neutaaaa: Me?

[Party] Ji9Star: ...

‘But why?’

He wasn’t a high enough level and they’d rejected his application once before, so Yeo-woon really hadn’t expected them to want to invite him into the guild. He’d expected all of this to end after the Couple’s event, with them going their separate ways.

[Server] Ji9Star: [Strawberry Jam] <<<<<<Come fight coward lol

[Server] Ji9Star: [Strawberry Jam] <<<<<<Come fight coward lol

[Server] Ji9Star: [Strawberry Jam] <<<<<<Come fight coward lol

That’s when three messages struck the chat, sent throughout the server with the help of three megaphones, one used for each message.

[Party] CroakRush: Oh my god look at that child lmaoooo

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: ? Why do you do all the fun things when I’m not around to watch it happen?

[Party] Captain Poseidon: He’s picking fights again. Someone please stop this guy... sob

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Ah, wait, I’m the GM here... ㅠㅠ

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Stop that, Earth!

[Party] CroakRush: Lmao it’s not like we can do much.

[Guild] Strawberry: Oh? Lol

That’s when his new Guild Master, the person who had made him aware of everything, popped up in chat, seemingly surprised by this turn of events. Yeo-woon, who’d inadvertently unleashed Earth Star’s madness upon this guild, felt his hands tremble where they lay.

[Server] Ji9Star: [Strawberry Jam] <<<<< Stop hiding you coward!! Get over here

[Guild] Strawberry: ?? He talking to me?

Yeo-woon felt so anxious about the direction things were heading in that he couldn’t help but switch from his Party chat over to the Guild chat, telling them what was going on.

[Guild] neutaaaa: So, I asked them if they used any hacks.

[Guild] Strawberry: Loooooooooool n they said?

[Guild] neutaaaa: That none of them do?

[Guild] Strawberry: Ofc they did loool

[Guild] Motsuena: Oh newbie, you really believed them haha. You’re so naive, that’s so cute haha.

“Cute…?”

‘What the fuck.’

Yeo-woon decided it was best to just repress that Motsuena had said anything. Most humans came pre-equipped with an instinctual crazy radar and Yeo-woon’s was off the charts, at this point. Motsuena just had that kind of air about him, like he was someone to stay far away from. But then his attention was redirected to the other ongoing train wreck, as Strawberry used a server megaphone of their own, to get back at Earth Star.

[Server] Strawberry: If u wanna talk there’s this cool thing called a whisper.

[Server] Ji9Star: Just another hacker maniac... You got a crush on me? Am I all you ever talk about? ㅜㅜ So sorry that I just have way better control over my character than you ever will. Can’t be helped, can it?

[Server] Ji9 Star: ★★★No hacks here★★★

[Server] Ji9star: I can take 15 of you by myself, easy! If people make videos tying up their own hands, claiming it’s me using telekinesis to win against them, will you still believe everything they say? ‘Cause then you better go sharpen up your own kinetic skills right now.

In response to Strawberry, Earth Star demonstrated his not-so-secret technique of saying ten words in the span of time that most others could only say one in. At this point, Yeo-woon wasn’t even surprised anymore.

[Server] Strawberry: U saying u wanna do guild wars? Sounds fun lol

[Server] Ji9Star: Oh I’ve heard about those before and not gonna lie haha ㅠᄉㅠ Each guild war brings shame upon your whole fucking family

[Server] Ji9Stars: Guild wars are the biggest waste of time and I’m done wasting anything on you, so let’s just go with 2V2 PVP ><

[Server] Strawberry: Kk Ill take one to go chief

[Server] Ji9Star: Since I don’t like you, you’ll even get an amazing deal of only 7mil per piece!!

[Server] HamsterFriend: Oh my god can you shut up already; Is this some weird mating dance or what? If you wanna fight, just go fight!!!!!!! Thanks to you I didn’t even see what loot I got.

[Server] Strawberry: Well get things rolling n then sent u the deets. We can choose the fighters tho right lol?

[Server] Ji9Star: Sure

Earth Star, who had escalated things into a full PvP battle, now prowled around in front of the Dungeon portal like a caged tiger, while switching between ever new weapons.

‘All I wanted was to level up more quickly.’

Meanwhile, his Guild chat was filling up with ever more curses and insults aimed at the people they called hackers and made by Strawberry and multiple other guild members. They also said it was good that things went the way they did because, judging by what they said, they wanted to broadcast the fight to the world, to show once and for all that Poseidon was a guild full of hackers.

‘Aren’t things getting a bit too intense?’

Yeo-woon couldn’t help but worry that he’d been the catalyst of this whole fight and the anxiety of it all lead him to try and write a message, but erase his words again and again before he was finally okay with what he sent.

[Party] neutaaaa: Is this really okay...?

[Party] CroakRush: Eh this is far from the first time -_-

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Dear Earth, you may discover your position has been returned to you ^^

[Party] Ji9Star: ᄋ0ᄋ!

[Party] Ji9Star: Yay!!!!!!!!!!!

In direct contrast to Strawberry Jam’s chat, Poseidon seemed to be buzzing with positive energy. Earth Star didn’t mention hacks again and no one even brought up Strawberry Jam from then on. It was like their enthusiasm was carrying them far away from anything that could’ve bothered or annoyed them.

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 13

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Time for the actual text (enjoy)!

That evening, Yeo-woon came home late, after eating with Jeong Se-hyung and doing some errands, so he logged into the game late as well.

[Whispering] Mountain Spirit: Has the mighty woodcutter appeared?

But still, as soon as he logged in, someone sent him a whisper. For a moment, Yeo-woon thought he had been transported into a traditional fairy tale.

[Whispering] Mountain Spirit: I heard of him by way of the sellsmanship notice last week. Would he perchance still be in possession of the most glorious of resurrection tokens?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Yes...

[Whispering] Mountain Spirit: Splendid indeed! Hahaha I shall take them all ^^ What may be the place’s name where we shall aquire that which the other holds at present?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Let’s do Channel 3 Isis

‘But I won’t be ready for the trade yet, right after switching the channel…’

So Yeo-woon rushed to get the requested items out of his storage, at the village’s Storage House, as soon as he entered the new channel. Somehow he still managed to get to the place they’d agreed on before Mountain Spirit, so he settled in to wait in front of the Isis Stone Tower, where they’d said they’d meet. Weirdly enough… there were a lot of people today who randomly sent him trade requests, perhaps by mistake.

But no, there were too many to blame it on simple coincidence... Unsure, Yeo-woon just kept waiting for Mountain Spirit, while he declined all the incoming requests.

[Whispering] Mountain Spirit: The start of a trade would delight this wandering soul.;;

As soon as he closed another trade request, he spotted a character that looked like a pure white mountain spirit, who was jumping in place to draw attention. It was Mountain Spirit. As the username suggested, they were dressed in a hanbok that made them look ethereal, and the white hair and beard that went all the way down to their waist made them look even more wise and holy.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Give me a sec, ppl keep sending requests. Why’s today so... Just one sec. I’m rejecting them all, so just hold on.

[Whispering] Mountain Spirit: Oh, but a glimpse of enlightenment has struck this soul: How much may you ask for, for each blessed item?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: 400/50pc, in total 200 million.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Btw why are you talking like that? Is being a mountain spirit you whole thing or something?

[Whispering] Mountain Spirit: That’s indeed the truth;

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Lmaoooo

When he put the requested Tokens of Resurrection into his side of the trading window, he saw Mountain Spirit was already displaying the necessary ‘200,000,000 Coins’ on their respective side of the trade as well. He counted the 0s to make sure the amount was really accurate and then he clicked on ‘Accept’, but somehow, in that small timeframe, another 0 had been added to the amount and he only noticed after he’d already clicked the button.

‘Trade successfully completed.’

“...huh?”

After he checked that he had, indeed, gotten way too much money for this trade, Yeo-woon immediately tried to send Mountain Spirit a new trade request. But the game told him he couldn’t, because Mountain Spirit had already left channel 3 for a different one, making a trade impossible.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Hey, you gave me too much money.

[Whispering] Mountain Spirit: ? How much more did this wayward mind bless you with?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: I was supposed to get just 200 million, but I got 2 billion.

[Whispering] Mountain Spirit: Haha, what an honorable woodcutter.^^ As reward, it is only right he shall get to keep the rest.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: ?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Hey wait

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Mountain Spirit

[Whispering] neutaaaa: You there??

‘Did that really just happen?’

First things first, Yeo-woon used a warp capsule, to escape all the people still sending him trade requests. He fled to a deserted village, so that his screen could finally stay free of the constant notifications, though he still had to contend with the insane amount of whispers in his chat. For the moment, he could relax.

[Server] Mountain Spirit: The fabled slot machine event was prosperous indeed. This participant had their doubts, but my amount was doubled haha. You may give 2 billion in a pretend-trade and receive 4 billion for it, in the end. May fortune smile upon you all. ^^

Just then, that Mountain Spirit, who Yeo-woon had been talking to, used a server megaphone to broadcast this strange message to everyone currently online in the game, regardless of what channel they were on. And as Yeo-woon slowly grew to understand the situation, a dumbfounded look took over his face.

[Whispering] GD Lemon: Hello? This is GM Lemon. It seems you won our game’s Sudden Surprise event, so please empty one spot in your inbox and we will send you the prize you won.^^

[Whispering] Chlorine: Hey, someone said if I give you money, they’ll double it. Is that true? Isn’t that reportable?

[Whispering] CM Centimeter: Hello, this is the new GM of the game. We are giving away 100 million coins to random players as a celebration reward. Would you like to participate?

[Whispering] Chlorine: I got 1 billion coins right now. If I give you 1 billion and receive 2 billion for it, I’ll split the profit with you after and send 500 million your way!! Want to make a deal?

As he watched more and more whispers coming in, frozen in place, he really felt like laughing. There was only one person who could be responsible for something like this.

[Couple] neutaaaa: .

[Couple] Ji9Star: I DIDN’T DO IT?!??! No way, no how!!

Even when he first came online today, Earth Star had been silent, not even trying to send a greeting. 

‘But as soon as I message, he’s yelling out incriminating stuff.’

It was so incredibly obvious, thanks to his reaction.

[Couple] neutaaaa: Haha, I haven’t even said anything yet.

[Couple] Ji9Star: Lmaoooooo

[Couple] Ji9Star: Oh... Guess I just got nervous haha

[Couple] Ji9Star: Also, why weren’t you on yesterday? >_<

[Couple] neutaaaa: Was busy drinking…

[Couple] Ji9Star: Lol…ㅠㅠ I’m no good at drinking myself

[Couple] Ji9Star: If you were on yesterday, you would of gotten the quest for the 3rd job change already by now.

As his character idly sat on the deserted Marchen Bridge, Earth Star soon appeared beside him, with the help of a warp capsule. He threw his black shadow spear weapon in all possible directions, weaving his way through the air. Then, as soon as he got close to Yeo-woon, he slammed the spear into the ground and spammed random emotes, more and more of them the more time passed.

[Couple] Ji9Star: I’ve no way to reach you.

[Couple] Ji9Star: And this event period is so short. It’ll be over before you know it and if you’re not logging in each day, we lose out on too much experience...

[Couple] neutaaaa: I can make up for it, so what does it matter?

[Couple] Ji9Star: But it was so frustratingㅜ

[Couple] Ji9Star: I waited all day yesterday...

[Couple] neutaaaa: ? Stoppppppppppp

Earth Star finally did stop his slew of emotes, then sent an apology in chat that seemed only half-serious.

[Couple] Ji9Star: Newt, you know Whole Blue?

[Couple] neutaaaa: I do.

[Couple] Ji9Star: Install it.

[Couple] neutaaaa: ?

Whole Blue was an app that was often used for games with a really bad in-game voice chat, so that people could talk in spite of that. He’d heard that many different groups used it to play games together, thanks to its amazing voice chat and the fact you could both talk and chat with multiple people at once in it.

‘I’ve used it so rarely though...’

[Couple] Ji9Star: And then I’ll tell you my friend code >_<

[Couple] neutaaaa: Why?

[Couple] Ji9Star: ‘Cause this is frustrating. I’m trying to make it easier coordinate things… Or do you want to always have to tell me when exactly you’ll be back, every time you log off for the day?

[Couple] neutaaaa: ?

[Couple] neutaaaa: But won’t I have to talk with you then?;; Sounds annoying...

[Couple] Ji9Star: Annoying for me, you mean ㅡㅡ;

[Couple] Ji9Star: So what’s your solution then?? Do you want me to have to wait all day long in here???

[Couple] Ji9Star: Did no one ever tell you that time’s even more precious than money??

Earth Star showed his irritation by moving all over the screen non-stop, as if his body would combust if he stood still for even a second. But below the surface, his frustration seemed sincere to Yeo-woon.

‘…if you just turn off the computer, it’s like the other person never existed anyway. So why should we establish some connection outside of the game?’

Yeo-woon really didn’t care for things like that.

‘Ji9Star invited you to join the party. Do you want to accept?’

Once he joined, Yeo-woon saw CroakRush and Captain Poseidon were already part of their team as well. It seemed like Captain Poseidon would replace KittycatMeowMeowMeowin their party for the day. It was a blessing and burden both, and as a result, Yeo-woon’s heart felt heavy for no concrete reason. CroakRush and Captain Poseidon saw where he and Earth Star had met up and so they joined them on the Marchen Bridge.

[Party] CroakRush: I heard our newbie is now a confirmed investment account!

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Sorry about himㅠㅠ I’m afraid all our guild members are secretly childrenㅜㅜ

[Party] neutaaaa: It’s fine

[Party] Ji9Star: You’re fine gm haha

Their four characters looked pretty cute, all sitting together on the railing on the bridge, so Yeo-woon took a quick screenshot without even thinking about it. The little Poseidon Guild mark above three of their heads looked nice, surrounded by the flowing river and the map’s starry background. Nearly romantic, even.

[Party] Ji9Star: Newt, did I have you all wrong from the start? I feel like I did

[Party] Ji9Star: I was wrong about you being one of those troublemakers, who insist on causing problems for the guild.

[Party] Ji9Star: I guess, now that I know you better, I can see you’re not like that...

‘All of a sudden? Just like this?’

[Party] Ji9Star: You’re actually just a normal guy, aren’t you?ᄃᄃ

[Couple] neutaaaa: ㅡㅡ?

[Party] Ji9Star: Ah, well, I just feel kinda sorry now, is all.

Yeo-woon, hopelessly confused, tilted his head to stare at his screen from a different angle, hoping that would somehow help with making sense of Earth Star’s weird shift in behavior.

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Your acting is really good ^^; But I know that’s all this is, so I won’t give you back your guild position yet.

[Party] neutaaaa: Lmao that explains it...

[Party] Ji9Star: Damn haha whatever

Seemed like the Guild Master was right and had caught Earth Star faking an apology in front of Captain Poseidon, in an attempt to get his position back. Even without being a part of their guild, Yeo-woon really liked their Guild Master because of how strict he was with Earth Star.

[Party] neutaaaa: Earth Star

[Couple] neutaaaa: What do you do for a living?

[Party] Ji9Star: Ah, what’s this sensation. Almost like I heard someone talking who won’t even install Whole Blue.

[Party] neutaaaa: Are you rich in-game because you’re rich irl too and bought coins with money?? Or how did you get those

[Party] Ji9Star: Lmaooooo

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Lmaoo...

The laughter made Yeo-woon feel a bit like he’d missed some joke, leaving him as the odd one out.

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Money... I guess he has a lot...? It feels strange to think about, because we never really talk about these things.

[Party] neutaaaa: Is that because you’re actually unemployed, Earth?

[Party] Ji9Star: ? Lol I’ve had the same job for the last 14 years.

Even if he’d started work straight out of high school... that would still leave him older than even Yeo-woon’s cousin. Yet, the way he talked didn’t make him sound that age at all.

[Party] CroakRush: He’s a 2nd year college student lol.

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Lmaoooo 14 years

[Party] Ji9Star: Ugh, giving away the game right from the start, really?

Earth Star’s character fell to the floor, seemingly crying. Then he just disappeared, so Yeo-woon checked his location on the map, since they were still in one party together, and he found him at the entrance to the ‘Wrath of the Lion King’ Dungeon, which was higher in level than the Ant Cave they’d farmed before.

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Oh, Earth Star legit ran. Are you feeling embarrassed? Shall we join you over there?

[Party] CroakRush: For sureee lmaooo

[Whispering] Ji9Star: You installed Whole Blue yet?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: I’ll get dinner soon…ㅜ Aren’t you curious when I’ll be back?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: You were curious what I do for a living tooㅜㅜ

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Aren’t you curious what I’m getting for lunch too?

“...”

Earth Star was a real pro at using every feature in the game to its fullest potential. Using the Party chat, whispers, and even occasionally the Couple chat, all to sent separate messages. But still, Yeo-woon had never been curious about what others might eat, or when.

‘I don’t even know what I ate myself yesterday...’

[Party] neutaaaa: Ah, those quiet whispers again. I really can’t understand them

[Party] Ji9Star: You’re so annoying

[Party] neutaaaa: Sure sure

[Party] CroakRush: Whispering in secret like a real couple… You sure you’re not together?

[Party] Ji9Star: Real couple what a joke

[Whispering] neutaaaa: You roach, are you really bullying me too, now?

[Party] CroakRush: ;; Sorry

With Earth Star this frustrated about not having a way to contact each other, Yeo-woon contemplated giving in. For now, he followed his team members into the Dungeon, but in the background, he searched up the app and left it to download and install. When they defeated the Dungeon’s boss, the lion king, the app was already done installing.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: 2445ealbkn

[Whispering] Ji9Star: ?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Oh

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Nice

Earth Star seemed to have recognized the whisper as Yeo-woon’s friend code near instantly and so he got a friend request on Whole Blue from him just as fast. As soon as Yeo-woon clicked ‘Accept’ on the friend request, a chat room appeared with the two of them in it. A button to start a voice chat was at the bottom right of the screen, while the chat room itself allowed them to write messages back an forth, same as they had been doing in the game they played together.

[Party] Ji9Star: Time for dinner ><

[Party] Captain Poseidon: In that case, I’ll take a coffee break too for a bit.

[Party] CroakRush: Got some chores from my dad brb…

And just like that, Yeo-woon was left alone, with only three idling charactere in front of a Dungeon, after they’d all agreed to meet back up in half an hour. A few moments later, Earth Star sent him a picture. Seemed like his dinner was pan-fried chicken, seasoned with a nice red sauce. He hesitated for just a second, unsure what to reply with, but eventually settled on a simple thumbs up emoji.

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 12

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Now, back to the story!

After drinking the night away, Yeo-woon had fallen asleep like he’d been knocked out. In the middle of his rest, he heard his own ringtone. When using a pillow to keep the noise from his ears didn’t work, Yeo-woon begrudingly got up and started his search. He followed the ever- louder ringtone, until he finally held his phone in his hand.

“Hello!”

Yeo-woon took the call with a displeased tone. 

‘Whoever’s calling better be prepared to die, if this isn’t the most important phone call ever.’

“…Ah yes.”

Yeo-woon had went from unable to even open his eyes to a professional air and tone in an instant. There was no more anger to be found in his posture.

“Yeo-woon, please, I’m trying to sleep...”

Soon enough, the call was over. Yeo-woon, had only just woken up a moment ago, so he put the phone on his bed and went to the floor, where he could grab Se-hyung and shake him into full wakefulness.

“Se-hyung, wake up.”

“Huh?”

“Just get up, you gotta look at me.”

“Why?”

Se-hyung eyes remained firmly shut, but Yeo-woon still made him get on his feet, holding him steady as he said the next part.

“Slap my face.”

“Okay.”

Clap!

Se-hyung slapped Yeo-woon across the face without any hesitation, and it hurt Yeo-woon so much, he instinctually retaliated with a headbutt, knocking Se-hyung back to the ground. While he whined about an aching head and the rude awakening, Yeo-woon stood frozen, because now he knew for sure.

‘This isn’t a dream…’

“I got the job.”

Sehyung blinked up at him as the words slowly registered and then he grimaced, launching into a new line of complaints.

“But how? What about yesterday then, huh? You were all ‘they already decided on someone!’ this and ‘can I sue for the wasted time?’ that.”

“Hehe...”

At Yeo-woon’s sheepish smile, Se-hyung’s face twisted into pure disgust. Through gritted teeth, he finally forced out his next words.

“You’re so stupid... Congratulations, bastard. So, you gonna move? They say it’s always best to live close-by.”

“I’ll start looking at some places. But it’s not like I have to move right away.”

“Just look at a lot of different places and don’t let them talk you into renting some shithole.”

Yes, that was what mattered most. Yeo-woon couldn’t hold back his happy laughter anymore, so he let it all out, filling up the room. Then he froze, as his blood went cold from an important realisation.

“…I didn’t do my daily check-in yesterday.”

“What check-in?”

“Aah, it’s all your fault!”

He stumbled over to his computer to turn it on, pushing away his friend with his foot along the way, since Se-hyung had gone back to being sprawled out all over the floor. But in response to the weak kick, he curled up and began muttering to himself.

“This is painful to witness... Just some game anyway. Who cares if you don’t log in for a day?”

“It’s more than just a missed day, it’s rewards too!”

Whatever. He didn’t expect the guy who only ever played Minesweeper and Tetris to understand this anyway. Yeo-woon focused on logging in, typing his password and ID into the login screen. He still wouldn’t receive yesterday’s attendance rewards, but he was anxious to get back into the game all the same.

First the loading window appeared, with its cute little characters. Then the screen changed to show the village he’d logged out in, the last time he’d played. A red notification instantly greeted him.

‘Your mailbox is full, so you cannot access the Auction House! Please empty your inbox, to gain back your access!’

He didn’t know what could have caused this, so he double-clicked the Postman that was still right in front of him and checked his mail. What he found was 20 pages of new mails. Eight mails could fit onto one page, so that made 160 new mails he’d received, even though he hadn’t even logged in yesterday. It looked like each mail had something attached to it as well, since he couldn’t press the button to just delete all the mail.

Ji9Star [.]

Ji9Star [.]

Halloween Eggplant [New Year’s Cash]

Ji9Star [.]

Impeatuous Peatection [Your allowance^^]

Ji9Star [.]

Ji9Star [.]

Ji9Star [.]

1 2 3 4 … 19 20 ▷

Most mail came from Earth Star, but sometimes other people’s names would pop up. After opening the very first mail on the list, Yeo-woon couldn’t help but laugh out loud from how dumbfounded he felt.

[Received mail]

Sender: Ji9Star

Title: .

(empty)

Attachment: 100,000,000 Coins

‘That bastard really couldn’t just accept me giving the 1.2 billion back and making a run for it, huh...'

“Lee Yeo-woon. I’m going back to bed. Just wake up for lunch when it's three.”

“…Uh, sleep well.”

Se-hyung finally left the floor behind, to instead monopolize Yeo-woon’s bed. But the bed's owner didn’t even check what Se-hyung was doing, too busy scrolling down his computer screen. He opened each mail one by one and then went to his chatbox, trying to open the Couple tab he had there with Earth Star. But maybe it was still too early in the day, because Earth Star was shown as offline.

So Yeo-woon headed off to the village’s nearby bank instead, to first put away all his own money. This way, with the money he was now carrying on his person being 0, he’d have an easier time counting exactly how much money Earth Star had sent him. For now, he excluded any mail from other Poseidon members and only collected the attached money in Earth Star’s mails, but he still ended up with an impossible sum of money that just kept on growning and growing from where he’d originally started with 0. After working his way through just three of the twenty pages, he alteady got a notification that he’d unlocked the [Get Rich Quick] achievement.

‘Achievement Unlocked: Get Rich Quick’

There were many achievments in the game and each could be unlocked by accomplishing specific things. But even then, there was no actual effect they caused, just some nice accomplishments you could feel proud about, so there was no real reason to actively collect them. Soon enough, Yeo-woon held 10 billion coins in his inventory. The amount sent with each mail kept randomly changing too and occasionally there were event items attached alongside the money.

‘He’s crazy. What’s he doing, sending more than 10 billion coins to a random person like me? What if I’d just run away with it all?’

Yeo-woon couldn’t say he understood Earth Star anymore at all. Once he’d went through each mail Earth Star had sent, he’d amassed a sum close to 50 billion.

After he noted down the exact amounts everyone had sent, Yeo-woon started returning the money to its rightful Poseidon members. In response, the ones who were online right now sent him messages in the Friends chat.

[Friend] CroakRush: Huh?

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: Just keep it...

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Really now! Newb is just as naughty as Earth said... ;;

[Friend] neutaaaa: T not B, it’d be Newta if anything

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: ? Damn...

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Thought I graduated school just fine, but now I can’t even read the alphabet anymore ig.

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: Lmaooooo

“Oh, you actually just wanted to call me a newbie.”

Yeo-woon, who’d just realized that had been the actual meaning, just sat there staring. And then he frowned. After inadvertently accusing Halloween Eggplant of not knowing the alphabet, he decided to go all in and also disprove what he’d actually meant by it.

[Friend] neutaaaa: And I’m not a newb, I played another game before, but it kept getting worse.

[Friend] neutaaaa: I even was a max level chef in it, okay?

[Friend] neutaaaa: I got to be the sous chef in the biggest tavern of the Paladin server.

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: LOL Little Forest 2?

“…!”

His heart raced as he saw Halloween Eggplant correctly name the game he used to play. He had a different username now than he’d had on Little Forest, but a part of him still wondered if Halloween Eggplant had recognized him. His surprise made him impulsive and so he just asked.

[Friend] neutaaaa: Hey, did you know me on there?

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: How would I lol

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: But there’s a bunch of LilFor refugees who’ve switched to Illusion you sweet summer child lmao

[Friend] neutaaaa: Ah…

The games did share a genre, so Yeo-woon had also heard about many people that went for Illusion once they abandoned Little Forest 2. It was sad, because Little Forest 2 used to be a masterpiece among games. But these days, most of its long-term players had given up and left. Over time, especially with a switch in the company developing the game, it had become more and more bug-ridden and unoptimised and to attract new players, a lot of the old mechanics had been radically changed or even removed entirely. Many people who used to enjoy the original game had been unable to adapt to the changes and so the game was heading towards its end.

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Why do they keep coming here anyway? They’re always saying this game is shit lmaoo.

[Friend] CroakRush: Newguy we usually just call you our newbie;;

[Friend] neutaaaa: But I’m nearly level 160 now, aren’t I?

[Friend] CroakRush: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahaha ahh!

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: ? PFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: Your level is still really low haha

[Friend] CroakRush: 160 lmaoooo

“You...”

Just looking around the village, Yeo-woon saw more than enough people that were a lower level than him. He really didn’t get why these guys insisted on laughing at his current level, when they’d been the ones to help him reach it in the first place.

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: So why does our newbie just reject our help like that?

[Friend] neutaaaa: I’ll just accept the help from now on ig. Thanks.

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Well, if that’s the case…

‘You have new mail! Please go to your inbox to check it.’

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: My help is more on the financial side of things.

‘You have new mail! Please go to your inbox to check it.’

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: Lol same for me...

‘You have new mail! Please go to your inbox to check it.’

[Friend] CroakRush: Since our newbie’s 3rd job improvement is coming up he’ll struggle with equipment anyway. It’s Illusion so you need a lot of money to enhance weapons. I heard in LilFor your weapon doesn’t get destroyed even if the enhancement fails?

[Friend] neutaaaa: Ah yeah...

[Friend] neutaaaa: That took some getting used to.

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: FR???? Wdym it doesn’t get destroyed??

In the last game he’d played, Little Forest 2, if you failed to enhance a weapon, the chance to succeed the next time went up by 0.5% and the main weapon you’d tried to enhance didn’t get destroyed either. As a result, Yeo-woon had never expected a weapon to break in that way, until he’d switched to Illusion and experienced this painful situation firsthand.

CroakRush walked up to his character and sat down right in front of him.

[Friend] CroakRush: I spent a whole month trying to get my cane to survive until +3 and then getting a good spirit stone for it.

[Friend] CroakRush: Wanna see? I made the stats public just now

[Friend] neutaaaa: Huh

The weapon CroakRush had equipped changed its color, from its edges towards its middle. Sometimes Yeo-woon had spotted other players with weapons like that and he always tried to check their equipment details, but people could hide those, if they wanted, and many players did just that.

[Friend] CroakRush: Love that cane haha.

[Friend] CroakRush: Its total stat boosts are 250+!

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: I broke so many weapons to get my enchanted golden hammer too.

That staff had an impressive Lv. 10 boost for attack power, Lv. 9 boost for all stats, and Lv. 8 boost for attack speed. It even had two more boosts, though they were less impressive, but still provided a small boost to defense and damage reduction. With all of that combined, anyone would scramble to buy that staff, if it ever appeared in the Auction House.

[Friend] CroakRush: But I still haven’t enhanced my armor haha… After the 3rd job upgrade you’ll really notice the stat changes depending on what you equip but enhancing it is hard.

[Friend] CroakRush: Even with all the LilFor refugees we keep getting they don’t stay too long haha. Weren’t there also some you switched over with and who’ve quit since then because of how expensive things get?

[Friend] neutaaaa: No clue, I always played solo...

[Friend] CroakRush: Anyways, this is so you’ll keep playing. It’s normal to give newbies nice things like this to keep them! Lmao all of this is reminding me of when we raised our cat too.

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: ?? Cat raised himself.

[Friend] CroakRush: Sometimes I buffed him tho so it’s p much the same ^^

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Why help someone who’s trying to become a Valkyrie?

Since they were discussing a player called Cat, they probably meant KittycatMeowMeowMeow. Yeo-woon remembered he was a Wolfist, which was part of the Explorer class and their 4th and final job was the Valkyrie. Valkyries were ranked the number one job to avoid playing at all costs, in a ‘Top 5 Jobs to Avoid’ guide Yeo-woon had found when he first started playing Illusion. They apparently had difficult controls, weren’t good solo-units and their overall performance was pretty low. Even though the job had been added to the game not that long ago, it was already infamous for getting zero love from the developers.

[Friend] neutaaaa: I heard Valkyries don’t really do much...

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Wellㅡㅡ; Maybe he’s just young and still full of hopes and dreams!

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: Btw I heard that no one could send you mail yesterday bc your inbox was full... Would Earth Star happen to be the culprit behind that?

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Oh, true true haha. How much did Earth send anyway?

“….”

Everyone else had sent some amount between 50 million and 100 million coins. It’d be normal to assume everyone had stayed in that ballpark, Earth Star included. So Yeo-woon hesitated a little, but then he typed in the numbers and send them off with the Enter key.

[Friend] neutaaaa: 50...

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: 50 million? LOL What a cheapskate

[Friend] neutaaaa: Wrong...

[Friend] CroakRush: What so did he only send 50 coins?

[Friend] neutaaaa: 50 billion

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: 50 billion??

[Friend] CroakRush: Did you type a 0 too many????

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: ??

Like he’d expected, everyone was dumbstruck by an amount so high that they felt it had to be a typo. His chatbox became really active, with everyone calling Earth Star crazy for what he’d done. They were right. 50 billion was enough to buy a full set of equipments that already had good stats and enhancements, no extra work necessary.

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Ah, Earth Star’s still asleep ig.

[Friend] CroakRush: Woah but the guy did always change the topic when I asked how much he’s got.

[Friend] CroakRush: Never would’ve thought he’s that filthy rich;;

Because the person in question was still offline, they couldn’t ask him why he’d done something this outrageous. Which just made it worse.

Yeo-woon took the chance to send a mail back to Earth Star with the 50 billion coins attached to it and then he immediately logged into his alt account that he normally just used for additional storage space. But this time he used it to send a flood of mails to his actual character, neutaaaa, until his inbox was filled to bursting again. Now, even once he’d log in, Earth Star wouldn’t be able to send him anything per mail and so he’d be forced to keep his 50 billion himself.

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 11

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Now, let's get to the text!

Jeong Se-hyung: Soo… how’s the interview gone?

- I have so much to tell you

Jeong Se-hyung: Haha sounds like it’s time to get roaring drunk

- Sure, come by this evening...

Jeong Se-hyung: Ok

He’d flunked the interview. It felt like everything he tried to say got stuck in his throat, words leaving his mouth in an endless stutter and to add insult to injury, after it was all over another interviewee went right up to the HR head, calling him “uncle” and joining him for lunch. Of course, he’d also applied to other jobs and he hadn’t expected this to be an easy job to get, but he still felt cheated. If they already had someone picked out for the position, why waste everyone’s time by doing these interviews?

Before the memory could grow distant and this awful anger burn out again, Yeo-woon wanted to at least write down a raw, heartfelt review of his experience, on a job searching website. But all the closest cafes were overfilled, every seat taken. He couldn’t help but think that there were just too many people around this area. So, like last time, Yeo-woon went across the street and found the now-familiar road to another cafe.

When he opened the door, a little chime sounded and the aromatic smell of coffee filled his lungs. Here, every seat was also taken, but he saw one customer who had just finished up, leaving with their tray. It was perfect timing and Yeo-woon headed straight for the empty seat, placing his bag on the chair. Some people nearby, who’d eyed the chair like hungry wolves and made a move to get up, all settled back down with a sigh.

Yeo-woon wasn’t sure why so many people would want to switch to this particular chair. There wasn’t even a convenient plug to keep one’s laptop charged and the cramped spot could barely fit a single person.

‘It’s some popular spot that everyone except me understands the reason for, is that what it is?’

“…?”

When Yeo-woon took his wallet and made a move towards the counter, to order a coffee, he noticed a familiar face. The man behind the counter, who stared off into space with an expression like he’d prefer death over being here, because the world was a horrible place and having to stand behind this counter was somehow even worse. So Yeo-woon sat back down for a moment. That’s how he learned that his seat actually had a pretty clear view of the counter, even from a sitting position.

“Would you like to order?”

He’d finally approached the counter and as he looked over the menu, that’s what the man behind the counter asked him. Yeo-woon took a glance at his name-tag. ‘Yoon Jigu’* were the yellow letters engraved on a simple black background.

(* = translator’s note that Jigu is written and said like Earth in korean - so this name is like being called Hope or Hunter - no idea how to localize that lmfao)

“I’d like an Americano and cheesecake.”

“Are you eating here?”

Yeo-woon just nodded, otherwise staying silent.

‘I was scared when I met him last, because of the hat and jogging clothes he wore, but now he’s still intimidating, just a little less than before.’

Even dressed in a professional uniform like that, Yeo-woon’s heart sped up whenever their eyes met, maybe because he still had those glinting piercings in his ears. But even if he’d lean over and ask Yeo-woon how much money he had on his person, he wouldn’t be too worried. So he took a deep breath, trying his best to calm down.

“That other time.”

As soon as Yeo-woon said this, the man looked up from where he’d been inputting the order into the register. With the sharp glare sent his way, Yeo-woon was left to wonder if he’d said something bad.

“You were there to feed the cat in the alley, right?”

“…You live around these parts?”

“No. I’m that one person who asked you for directions.”

“So what, you know me?”

“I not really sure?”

“Then why act as if we know each other?”

“…So you don’t remember me.  I asked you for directions and accidentally surprised you. I hope that helps you remember...”

After Yeo-woon said that, the man’s gaze seemed focused in on his face for a strangely long time, but eventually he pursed his lips, shaking his head. Somehow, Yeo-woon felt disappointed that the other didn’t remember him. But the man himself seemed strangely displeased too.

He tapped on the register a few more times, made sure Yeo-woon’s card was in the card reader and then finished the transaction. With a slight crackle, a receipt with Yeo-woon’s order appeared. The man tore it off and held it out to Yeo-woon, together with his card.

“The things you ordered-”

“Hyung, the cheesecake out front has run out, so I’ll cut some more real quick.”

“…are on this receipt.”

“…?”

“...”

At first the man didn’t seem to realize what he’d said. The part-timers behind him instantly looked away and tried to stifle their own laughter, while the man’s face now slowly got redder and redder. Yeo-woon only remembered to take the card and receipt from him, once the man had turned completely red, from his nape all the way to his previously white ears.

He didn’t want to laugh at someone who was so clearly embarrassed, so Yeo-woon instead clutched his card tightly as he went back to his seat, keeping his head down for a while, until the impulse to laugh out loud had finally passed. Some minutes later, he collected his drink and cake from the front and brought them back to his seat, where he finally got to turn on his laptop and access the job-search site, where he wrote his feedback with more passion than he’d put into his own job application. Reading it back, he really liked the way it was devoid of any swears, but still showed his anger about the situation in a very polite way.

Jeong Se-hyung: I’ll get there a bit late, maybe at 9.

- K

Jeong Se-hyung: Remember to clean up before I get there~

- ㅗ

There wasn’t even a point to cleaning, when it was just his friend coming by. And even if he put in the effort, they’d just undo it all with their plans to drink, so it’d be like he never did anything by the time tomorrow morning would arrive. So Yeo-woon just calmly closed the job search page’s tab, thinking to himself that he may as well stay at the cafe for another hour or so. He opened up some other things to invest his time. First a news page about current events, then a newly updated webtoon he’d recently become invested in and finally, he remembered something else he’d wanted to do and so he looked up the very cafe he was sitting in.

Review by anon

★★★★★

It’s a new cafe, so their bathrooms are really clean! The coffee is kinda mid, but not the worst coffee I’ve bought. The real highlight is that one part-timer who’s really good-looking. Pretty sure that’s single-handedly raising the value of the entire neighbourhood.

(180 people found this helpful)

Review by coffee_is_life

★★★★★

Their Americano is nice and cheap~ Their cake is a great fit with the coffee and the new hire looks delicious too.

(162 people found this helpful)

Review by anon

★★★★☆

The coffee is meh, but there’s a cat that sometimes comes by! And they have a really handsome employee haha.

(130 people found this helpful)

Review by coolerthanyou

★★☆☆☆

What’s up with these reviews? Is this some viral marketing stunt? Hmm… maybe I’m just more handsome, so I don’t get it. The coffee is cheap and nice tho.

(150 out of 152 people found this unhelpful)

Review by shygal01

★★★★★

I just happened to be in the neighbourhood and at first I just thought this was some company’s interview location. Was a bit skeptical, but everyone’s honest, helpful reviews convinced me to give it a try and I’m really glad I did... so thank you :)

(120 out of 121 people found this helpful)

Last time, he hadn’t even bothered with reading the reviews, just looked at the overall rating and accepted those, but now he saw firsthand how many reviews were just complimenting some person’s looks. Yeo-woon looked up and over at the counter, where the man was still busy moving back and forth. Was that why such a remote cafe was always full of customers? Was it really all because of one employee?

“...”

“...”

By chance, the man looked over and since Yeo-woon was still looking at him, they happened to make eye contact. Strangely enough, the man frowned and then quickly looked away again.

Review by notmyname

★★★★★

I’m here the second time now and their cake is really delicious!! I’ll probably visit again, if I’m ever in the area.

After leaving that review for his visit, same as some might do in a guestbook, Yeo-woon closed his laptop and finished his coffee. Then he looked back down at what he’d doodled on a random napkin throughout his stay here. He’d done it just to keep his hands busy while the soft music played on in the background. Now he finished it, by putting a little dot below one of the eyes.

‘It’s not like I did it on purpose. I just draw whatever I see. That’s all there is to it.’

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 10

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Now, here's part 10!

[Party] Ji9Star: Did the ant queen go get milk and so her kids had to raise themselves?  Is that why they’re so fussy now and just spit on everyone instead of talking like grown-ups?

Earth Star really was incredibly weak in the Ant Cave map. On normal days, he’d fly all over the place, demolishing everything, but the Ant Cave map had low ceilings, so Earth Star would hit his head if he did that. There was just no easy way to jump and run and go wild as he usually would.

[Party] neutaaaa: Earth Star’s nearly dead again.

‘This is insanity. How’d that thing hit you hard enough to knock you all the way back... Are we really sure you’re max level?’

[Party] Ji9Star: Cockroach! Pls Roach! Save me!

[Party] CroakRush: It’s CroakRush ㅡㅡ

[Party] Ji9Star: But everyone else got to call you a cockroach too.

[Party] Ji9Star: Wait pls, my friend, my savior, I'm begging here

[Party] Ji9Star: And I’m sorry! >_<

So CroakRush used an HP recovery skill, to restore the fleeing Earth Star’s low health.

[Party] CroakRush: Stop running in front of me and just stay back here.

[Party] Ji9Star: But I’m close range dps lol. Tf will I do back here?

[Party] CroakRush: If you keep rushing in then there’s no point in me healing you so I just won’t.

[Party] neutaaaa: Lmaoooo

[Party] Ji9Star: Worst customer service

In direct contrast to Earth Star, who kept nearly dying, by rushing in and then running for his life, Kittycat MeowMeowMeow was dealing very high, consistent damage, even though he was a way lower level. Out of the three actual damage dealers they had, with CroakRush as their healer, Earth Star was clearly performing the worst.

[Party] Ji9Star: These ants just refuse to die... It’s so tiring and frustrating

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: ? Can’t shake the feeling the ants think the same, but about us.

[Party] CroakRush: Well to the ants we’re some random four home invaders ㅜㅜ

Even their twentieth time farming this map, Earth Star wasn’t doing any better. It was a bit ridiculous to witness a level 250 guy get knocked all the way back to the edge of the arena, just because he suffered one small hit from the level 200 boss enemy of the Ant Cave: the queen ant. Not even their healer CroakRush was affected by the queen ant’s hits. Sometimes, its attacks even missed entirely.

[Party] neutaaaa: Does Night Spear just have really low defense stats?

Night Spear was the highest job in the Knight class. Knights in general had the second highest base physical attack, right after Warriors, and Yeo-woon had always thought Knights were the class with the highest base defense, so he didn’t get why they’d fail this hard against some ants. Instead of keeping up his assault against the ant, Kittycat Meowmeowmeow froze in place, like he did whenever he typed in chat, and sure enough, a detailed answer to Yeo-woon’s question appeared.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: No! NS are mid-tanks, with high def!! They’re not like this... Might be hard to believe rn tho lmao

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Like in group PvPs, you need to kill the squishy players first, so you go for stuff like healers and gunners, while the NS is the v last kill!

“...”

‘What’s all this supposed to tell me?’

[Party] neutaaaa: Oh, I see...

‘There was no reason for all these details.’

But having thought that, Yeo-woon still bowed his head to the monitor like he would to a teacher. In any case, he knew now that Night Spears were actually meant to have way more defense than this.

[Party] CroakRush: Earth Star’s just an exception lmao. He abandoned defense for max speed... Still a Night Spear, but more of a mutant? Think of him like that.

[Party] Ji9Star: Mutant?

[Party] Ji9Star: I’ll get you twice for that one

[Party] Ji9Star: Anyway, I’m max level, so how could I ever die to some ant on 200? Lmao.

As soon as Earth Star sent that message, he got hit by a charged attack from the queen ant, catapulting him all the way to the other end of the arena.

[Party] Ji9Star: These ants are way too strong

[Party] neutaaaa: Thought you said you won’t die?

[Party] Ji9Star: Whatever

[Party] neutaaaa: Don’t quit now!

[Party] Ji9Star: I didn’t say nothing;

[Party] Ji9Star: No, seriously, I’ve got nothing left ㅡㅡ

[Party] CroakRush: Lmfaooooooo

CroakRush laughed at him, but still restored his health. It was so stupid. If he really was a class with incredible defense and a whole 50 level above this thing, then why was he getting eviscerated? Eventually, they managed to reduce the queen ant’s health to zero and it died with a little squeak. Then an animation played, where the ant’s black shell broke away and revealed the red layer below. After her first death, the queen ant was resurrected as the more aggressive red queen ant. This was a common mechanic for the game’s bosses, with many of them having three progressively stronger phases like the ant queen.

Earth Star rushed in with his spear, so fast he was a shadowy blur as he struck the ant queen again and again and then got hit right in the face by its poison. At that point, he fled and hid away behind Yeo-woon, hoping to get some health back.

[Party] neutaaaa: Hey

[Party] Ji9Star: ?

‘Should I really say this?’

He hesitating a moment, but Yeo-woon quickly realized this was Earth Star, so there was no reason to be considerate and so he resumed typing.

[Party] neutaaaa: You’re in the way.

[Party] Ji9Star: ...?

Earth Star froze in the middle of the arena and used a gasping emote to show his surprise. But as he did so, he got hit again by the ant queen, launching him across the place. It felt like Earth Star had just rolled over to let all monsters take a swing at his underbelly, with how he’d been hit and poisoned more often at this point than he’d landed his attacks.

[Party] neutaaaa: Thanks to you, Kit couldn’t even use all his skills.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Cat pls.

[Party] Ji9Star: No way; Wouldn’t Cat just say himself, if I’m being such a bother?

Kittycat MeowMeowMeow froze again. Thanks to that, he nearly looked lost in though, but then a blue speech bubble popped up above his head, showing the same words that appeared in the chatbox.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Lol tbh didn’t think I had to say it.

[Party] Ji9Star: Wha...?!

[Party] CroakRush: Lmfaooooo

[Party] neutaaaa: See, you’re no help. So how about you just stay back?

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Yeah!!

[Party] Ji9Star: I can’t believe a low level player is saying this to me ㅜㅜ

[Party] Ji9Star: I’m bringing shame to my family...

Earth Star used a crying emote, but from then on, he no longer rushed in and instead only added the occasional long-distance hit, whenever his skill for that attack came off its cooldown.

[Party] Ji9Star: I’m really powerful in PvP tho...

[Party] Ji9Star: No one wants me as their opponent >_<

[Party] neutaaaa: Who asked?

[Party] CroakRush: Lmaoooooo

[Party] Ji9Star: I was talking to myself actually;

[Party] neutaaaa: Ah, but I still heard you...

[Party] neutaaaa: Talk to yourself more quietly pls.

[Party] Ji9Star: Did you say something?;; I’m so far away, I can’t hear you over there and it’s not like I’m saying nothing anyway.

[Party] neutaaaa: Oh, so now you’re going off on your own?

[Party] Ji9Star: Beats dealing with the antsㅡㅡ If you keep this up, you’ll be fine anyway.

[Party] CroakRush: Lol thanks to who?

[Party] Ji9Star: Gamers;

[Party] neutaaaa: So you’re leaving me to do it by myself again lmao. Won’t kill you to admit it, you know?

[Party] Ji9Star: That’s stupid why am I here then huh even tho it’s annoying

[Party] CroakRush: Lol ever heard of commas?

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Have fun

[Party] Ji9Star: Shush, cat

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: What, why reply to me out of everyone

Earth Star sure was incredibly weak to the Ant Cave. In other maps didn't pile up his specific disadvantages like this. But since you couldn’t move up or down much here and the narrow sides offered no space for evading attacks either, this Night Spear was facing some serious issues.

After the ant queen died a second time and turned into her final, third form, Earth Star went as far back as he could and even hid away behind CroakRush. Yeo-woon had never before seen a close range dps use a healer as their shield. Meanwhile, the ant had turned blue and oozed two debuffs into its surroundings. One debuff slowed the player down, the other made them more vulnerable to its poison.

Kittycat MeowMeowMeow moved behind the ant and shackled it with a skill, keeping it stuck in place. The ant queen stomped its feet and roared, while Yeo-woon used this chance to get healed up by CroakRush and then rush in, to use all his skills in quick succession as soon as they came off cooldown.

That’s when something changed. Suddenly, motivational words like ‘Keep it up!’ and ‘We’ll win this!’ came from the computer’s speakers, in ever new voices. The cause of it all was Earth Star, who was spamming emotes with sounds attached to them.

Earth Star’s character raised his arms above his head, jumping up and down and waving a shiny cheer-item around. Since it was more than just one or two different sentences, there had to be a wide variety of cheering emotes he was spamming for this.

[Party] Ji9Star: Beat them, ants!

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: ?

[Party] Ji9Star: Let’s go, ants, let’s go!

[Party] neutaaaa: ;;

[Party] CroakRush: Looks like he’s officially lost it..

Earth Star was using many emotes with sounds, to cheer on a scene of a queen ant getting beat up by two low-level damage dealers and their level 240+ healer. Finally, the final version of the ant queen fell, in spite of its struggles, and after it made a noise signifying its defeat, multiple item bags appeared right next to its corpse. Since all three Poseidon guild members had farmed this Cave so much, they needed no more items from it, they just watched Yeo-woon walk around and pick up everything.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Newguy, you level up so fast… Did you use an elixir?

[Party] neutaaaa: Yep, the 500% elixir and I took another elixir to get 3x the quest rewards.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Ah, I was wondering how you went up so quick haha.

The elixir was increasing his gained experience by 500%, so his experience had risen very quickly with each run of the Dungeon they’d done today.

‘Can I crack 160 today? With how fast we’re going, working as a party seems like the ideal way to level up.’

As Yeo-woon blindly picked up whatever items had dropped, he contemplated how much experience he would still need for the remaining level ups. He didn’t even check what it was, just pressed the space bar to pick it up and that’s when a notification window popped up, with a sparkly, joyful sound effect.

‘You got the item Rainbow Tulip Cradle (30 days)! Do you want to display your character name to the server?’

Yeo-woon just clicked ‘Yes’ without thinking and that’s how him aquiring this item got shown off server-wide in the global chat. When he went to check out the item in his inventory, he found it under the ‘Event’ tab, where the Tulip Cradle was listed as a mount. To him, it seemed pretty pointless. A pet could at least carry items for its player, but a flower?

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Wow

[Party] CroakRush: Woah I didn’t know that can be farmed.

[Party] Ji9Star: Huh

Everyone’s reactions made Yeo-woon doubt his first impression. They acted like it was a really good item. And then he got flooded with whispers from strangers, his chatbox quickly filling up with ever more messages.

[Whispering] Coolest Cat: Got urself a cool deal for 100 million

[Whispering] jklqwer22: Wowieee~~~

[Whispering] jklqwer22: Where’d you find that??

[Whispering] jklqwer22: I’ve been farming my way thru the Star Cradle for like 5 hours, but only got a Beaded Slipper...

[Whispering] Coolest Cat: 150 million ok

[Whispering] Your Father: How much to buy it off you? If you wanna sell it, just tell me the price of your highest bidder and I’ll beat them@@@@@@

[Whispering] Cn dealer: 700 million aaaaa

[Whispering] Coolest Cat: Cooler deal for 160 mil

[Whispering] Coolest Cat: Hey

[Whispering] Coolest Cat: Hey hey @!#$@!#$@!#$@!#$

[Whispering] Coolest Cat: Coolest deal for 190 mil

[Whispering] Coolest Cat: Had a change of heart and will do 200 mil if rn ok

Yeo-woon could only stare as new messages kept coming in faster than he could read the old ones. It was just some random mount, so it made no sense to him why everyone was so desperate for this thing. It wasn’t like there weren’t a lot of other mounts to choose from after all.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Is that Tulip player-bound on pickup? Never seen one at the auction house...

[Party] CroakRush: Nope

[Party] CroakRush: But they’re not sold much lmao. Even a 30 day one’s like 700 to 800 mil? Or If you put it in for instant-buy with 1 billion there’ll probs be a rich kid buying that within 12h.

‘Oh wow.’

There was an obvious reason to explain the different prices. Even though it could be traded, it was rarely in the auction house, so that must mean it also dropped pretty rarely.

[Party] neutaaaa: Is it actually that good?

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: It’s not about it being good, it’s that the Tulip looks pretty!

[Party] neutaaaa: Ah…

‘Makes sense then, for a pretty mount.’

Yeo-woon himself had seen the event items from last year and they had made him wish he’d started playing this game earlier. He still felt some regret about missing out. These were the same reasons that the clothes in the Fashion Shop always sold really well, even though they provided no advantage in battle. But they looked pretty and that was enough.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Hey…

Then Yeo-woon suddenly saw his chat change color, because Earth Star sent him a whisper.

“What?”

‘Why are you whispering?’

As Yeo-woon still wondered about that, confused to no end, Earth Star paused for only a moment before he sent another message.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: If you’ll sell it anyway… would you give it to me for 1 billion?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: I threw away my pride to ask this…

Since he privately whispered this question, he probably didn’t want anyone else to know he was asking. Of course, Yeo-woon had no intentions of letting him get away with this, so he just chuckled to himself, before he wrote a message to their party.

[Party] neutaaaa: Sorry, you whispered that so quietly I didn’t catch it.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: What?

[Party] CroakRush: ??

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Ugh...

[Party] neutaaaa: Yeah, sorry, didn’t hear you, try whispering more loudly.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: ...

[Party] CroakRush: Did Earth actually sent you a whisper? Lmfaoooooo

[Party] CroakRush: Why didn’t I expect this hahahahahaha

[Party] CroakRush: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Party] CroakRush: God I can’t that’s funny; I gotta tell the guild chat rn

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: You wanted the Tulip that bad?? Lmaooooo

[Party] Ji9Star: Stop ragging, you cat

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Croak sent four messages and I only one.

[Party] Ji9Star: And someday I’ll get revenge on that cockroach, mark my words

[Party] CroakRush: Oh noes I’m so scared.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Oh gosh, I’m so scared.

[Party] Ji9Star: Are we sure this cat isn’t just a bad dog in disguise

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Even when I say the same as Croak I’m still the only one getting shit from this guy.

After Yeo-woon picked up the last few items, they left the Ant Cave Dungeon and so they returned to the Dark Tunnel it was located at.

‘Instant Dungeon Ant Cave has refreshed.’

[Party] Ji9Star: I think I’m developing ant phobia

[Party] CroakRush: Look at this guy changing the topic because he’s embarrassed.

Earth Star just quietly adjusted the party settings and then made a move towards the Dungeon’s portal again.

‘Oh, no no, not so fast.’

Before he could disappear, Yeo-woon quickly right-clicked on his avatar and sent a trade request to Earth Star.

[Party] Ji9Star: ? What?

Even though Earth Star seemed confused about what was going on, he immediately accepted the trade request. When the trade’s dedicated screen popped up, Yeo-woon dragged the Tulip onto his side of the trade.

[Party] Ji9Star: Oh woah, I don’t have the money on me… But I’ll get it rn. Brb!

[Party] neutaaaa: You don’t have to.

But Earth Star had already canceled the deal and ran off to get the money. With him gone, Kittycat MeowMeowMeow and CroakRush were quick to tell Yeo-woon he should ask for a higher price.

They told him to double the price. To say that a 0 was missing. To just tell him he wasn’t selling anymore, as soon as Earth got back. The two went on and on, essentially planning out how Yeo-woon could rob Earth Star of his last shirt, until the very moment Earth Star actually got back with the money.

[Party] Ji9Star: Newta, I’m back >_<

And just like that, the way he talked to Yeo-woon and what he called him had completely changed. For the first time, he was called a normal name by this guy, who’d so far only called him by ‘Hey’ and ‘You’.

‘Ji9Star sent a trade request.’

And so a new trade screen popped up for the two. When Yeo-woon dragged the Tulip onto his side of the trade once more, Earth Star typed in his corresponding amount of money. As soon as this number reached ‘1,200,000,000’, Yeo-woon quickly right-clicked the flower to remove it again and then pressed the button to confirm the trade from his side.

‘Trade successfully completed.’

[Party] neutaaaa: Tyy~^^

When he opened his inventory, he felt like he’d turned rich overnight. Earth Star said he’d give him 1 billion, but he could see the guy had added 200 million more to that amount.

[Party] Ji9Star: Huh?

[Party] Ji9Star: ??????

[Party] CroakRush: No way lmao

Earth Star seemed pretty confused, once he realized he’d been robbed. Since he just stood there and said nothing, Yeo-woon assumed he was searching his inventory for the Tulip.

‘[Illusion tip!] When you do a trade, first check that everything is in order, before you click ‘Accept’!’

When the global Illusion tip refreshed, as it did every 30 minutes, Yeo-woon couldn’t believe its perfect timing. He felt very satisfied about it all.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Heh

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Since we like each other so much, please give me your address.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Can I keep and resell whatever you send, if I don’t enjoy it?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Or I can give you my number and then you call me haha.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: I really just want to see your face once

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Lmao I don’t do that stuff...

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Hey, where do you live again?

A smile spread over his lips. Nothing was funnier than Earth Star trying to be threatening!

[Party] neutaaaa: Finally, to have reached days this sweet...

[Party] Ji9Star: ?

[Party] neutaaaa: I guess the heavens have finally blessed me for working hard every day.

[Party] Ji9Star: Do I look like the heavens?

[Party] neutaaaa: Time to thank my beloved parents for their efforts

[Party] Ji9Star: Do I look like your parent?

[Party] CroakRush: Lmaoooo

[Party] Ji9Star: How can you just play with someone’s heart like this?

‘Ji9Star wants to play a 1v1 match (PvP). Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the match.’

[Party] Ji9Star: Wild. Now this so-called friend won’t even grant me a fight after I said all those kind things.

[Party] neutaaaa: What kind things ㅜㅜ

[Party] Ji9Star: PVP time♡

‘Ji9Star wants to play a 1v1 match (PvP). Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the match.’

[Party] Ji9Star: Accept the PVP you coward♡♡♡

[Party] neutaaaa: I’m busy sitting around and telling others how many rich people I’ve robbed so far

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: He’s a legit idiot lmaooo

Seemed like a certain someone had shared the news in Poseidon’s guild chat. There was a sudden string of messages, all sent out with server-wide megaphones.

[Server] CroakRush: Dude actually got robbed by a noob for 1 bil man if that was me I’d just quit lmao.

[Server] Halloween Eggplant: My sincerest congratulations on getting scammed for the first time in your life! ^-^~

[Server] al0ha: Lmfaoooo

[Server] al0ha: gg gg

[Server] Captain Poseidon: Neu is starting his own buisness ^^

[Server] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Call Ji9★ Bank for interest-free loans ♨ Up to 1 billion for free/no payback

[Party] Ji9Star: Can’t believe the cat is being a bad dog again;

Poseidon’s guild members rushed in to celebrate the fact Earth Star had been scammed. They sounded genuinely delighted about this turn of events.

Even the Guild Master sent a whisper saying ‘Congratulations! Maybe that’s the consolation prize for your trouble! Haha’, taking Yeo-woon’s side. But Yeo-woon, the very person who’d just so easily gained 1.2 billion, felt his spite wash away, just watching Earth Star pepper his character with his spear, doing nothing to hurt him at all.

This had been fun. With a lighter heart, Yeo-woon sent another trade request to Earth Star, who was busy just running all over the place like a maniac.

[Party] Ji9Star: Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, shame on you ㅗ

[Party] neutaaaa: Just take it, I gotta go shower and sleep.

[Party] Ji9Star: You can’t fool me

[Party] Ji9Star: You cannot fool me.

[Party] Ji9Star: But uh... do you mean it?

[Party] CroakRush: Lmao watch him get robbed again. Earth boutta get famous for getting scammed out of 2 bil.

[Party] Ji9Star: ㅡㅡ

Yeo-woon had never really intended to take his money. It’s just the way things unfolded in the moment.

“Someone who falls for tricks like that deserves to be made fun of for a little while...”

But now, Yeo-woon dragged the flower he’d meant to give to Earth Star into the offerings side of his trade, along with the 1.2 billion he’d scammed him out of.

[Party] Ji9Star: Why’re you giving back the money?

Even though Yeo-woon pressed ‘Accept’ on the trade, Earth Star just exited the window without accepting and so the trade disappeared again.

‘The trade has been cancelled.’

‘Ji9Star sent a trade request.’

[Party] Ji9Star: I’ve got a conscience you know, so I can’t just scam items off a beggar like you lol...

[Party] neutaaaa: ? Just take what you’re given

[Party] Ji9Star: Nah;

Their next trade ended up cancelled for the exact same reason.

[Party] Ji9Star: What even is this? You didn’t even reach the 3rd job change yet. Stop throwing money at me!!

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Lol first he was angry he got robbed, but now he feels bad getting it for free lmao.

[Party] CroakRush: Just keep it, he’s loaded anyway.

[Party] Ji9Star: Ugh

[Party] neutaaaa: I thought it’d be obvious, but

[Party] neutaaaa: I wanted to thank you for doing 20 runs of that Domain.

[Party] neutaaaa: It was a lot of work haha.

Yeo-woon was aware that doing the Domain not once, but a whole 20 times couldn’t have been easy, especially with Earth Star’s disadvantages. Even if he only helped Yeo-woon improve for his own selfish reasons, it was still a lot of help and he felt grateful for it. This thing wasn’t even a cute pet, only some mount that he didn’t care for and so he was sure it would be better for this item, if it ended up with someone who really wanted to have it anyway.

[Party] neutaaaa: Even though you didn’t do much, I was always planning to just give this to you.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: But he didn’t do much, so why are you giving his money back too? Lmao you a philanthropist?

[Party] CroakRush: If you actually take that deal Earth then you’re trash. He’s got nothing to begin with so if you do that I’ll tell everyone you exort money and items from innocent newbies.

[Party] Ji9Star: No way I’d ever accept it;;;

[Party] neutaaaa: ㅜㅜ I’ve got an interview tomorrow, so I really gotta go... I’ll give you this stuff and then I’ll be off.

He really did have to leave. His second interview was scheduled for tomorrow, so he couldn’t keep arguing like this. It’d be awful, if he’d oversleep for such a stupid reason.

[Party] neutaaaa: Bye bye!

[Party] Ji9Star: Wait what

Yeo-woon left the party right away, so that Earth Star couldn’t say any more. He had a plan to put in action. He didn’t log out immediately, because he first had to go back into a village and speak with the postman.

‘Your mail has been sent.’

[Couple] Ji9Star: Bastard

[Couple] Ji9Star: Did you really just sent it as mail?

That chat message appeared the moment he sent off a mail with everything attached to it. Earth Star demanded to be answered and kept raging in the chat.

‘It’s so dumb, why does he always make a big deal out of everything, even me returning his money to him?’

Yeo-woon ignored his messages and just shut down his computer.

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation part 8+9

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

(Part 8 is very short, so pls just take both haha.) Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun. Now, let's get to it!

Title: Details for the ‘Spring is everywhere with you! [Springfield]’ Couple event

Author: GM Lemon

Hello, adventurers! GM Lemon here.

This season’s Couple event Spring is everywhere with you! [Springfield] has been added, so I am here to tell you the details:

- For the event’s duration, whenever a couple hunts together in the field, there will be various Buffs:

150% Experience

110% Movement speed

110% Attack speed

120% Attack range

- If you marry a player during this event, the normal Wedding Hall Raid Buff will be increased by 200%!

- For the event’s duration, the new theme costumes [May Bride/Groom] in the Fashion Shop will provide a Buff that increases your Movement speed!

- The [Spring Flower Draw Package] sold at the Fashion Shop has a chance to contain the two Couple Emoticons [Lovely Heart Shot] and [Romantic Kiss]!

- For the event’s duration, the Star Tree of [Log Raid - Star Tree] in the Guild Room is a cherry blossom tree!

- A temporary Dungeon is available for the event’s duration, in the hallways of Isis Palace, with special item drop rates that change in accordance to the level of the Dungeon. Available levels are:

Lv50

Lv100

Lv120

Lv150

Lv200

Lv220

- A new Couple Scenario has been added and can be started, by talking to the Elk at Isis Palace and accepting its quest!

(Comments have been disabled for this post)

.***.

‘neutaaaa has entered the game.’

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Hiiiii

[Friend] CroakRush: Hi hi

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: Hello!

[Friend] neutaaaa: Hello!!^o^

Yeo-woon wasn’t sure yet, if he could call these people his gaming buddies, but they always greeted him when he logged into the game.

‘This is so strange… but it makes the game even more fun.’

[Couple] Ji9Star: Sure, why not say hi to everyone but me again…

[Couple] Ji9Star: Hey

[Couple] Ji9Star: ??

[Couple] Ji9Star: You mother…

[Couple] Ji9Star: Haver ♡ Yay, you’ve won the Award for Worst Partner of the Year ♡

Yeo-woon just ignored that chat and opened his character’s status window. Back when he was level 124 he had finally completed the 2nd job improvement quest that appeared for any players on level 120 and more recently, he had reached level 150. Thinking back on it, he was sure that even without Earth Star’s help, it wouldn’t have taken him all that long to reach this height.

Even though he was max level, Earth Star hadn’t been much help to Yeo-woon. He was a bit curious how someone like him could be called one of the server’s top 50 PvP players, but he didn’t care enough to ask him about it. In all honesty, Yeo-woon didn’t care much about Earth Star in general.

‘Ji9Star invited you to join the party. Do you want to accept?’

He’d recently looked up a guide for what equipment would be best for his current level and class and now he was trying to make some improvements. That’s when the party-invite popped up on his screen. Seemed like Earth Star got bored of his messages being ignored and decided to pick a fight by different means.

“Why now? Didn’t you tell me to only come back when I get the quest for my third job upgrade?”

Yeo-woon sighed. He remembered a few days ago, back when he had still been in the process of completing his second job improvement and Earth Star had gotten tired of helping him, because it was taking too long. So, Earth Star told him to come back only once he’d reached the third job change quest and then he’d left to do whatever he did when he wasn’t bothering Yeo-woon…

Now, as Yeo-woon clicked the ‘Accept’ button on the invitation, multiple party members appeared in the Party List at the top left of his screen.

[Party] CroakRush: You there?

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Newguy hihi

[Party] neutaaaa: Yep hello

Weirdly enough, today, Earth Star wasn’t the only party member. Even though they weren’t exactly friends, there were members from the Poseidon Guild in this party that Yeo-woon had added to his Friends List. There were four party members in total. Earth Star, a level 250 Night Spear, CroakRush, a level 235 Healer, Kittycat MeowMeowMeow, a level 180 Wolfist, and Yeo-woon himself.

The only max level member in their party was Earth Star, and Kittycat MeowMeowMeow was a Wolfist, the 3rd job in the Explorer class. No matter how long Yeo-woon stared at this party, he couldn’t find any synergy between their characters at all.

[Party] Ji9Star: Baby, what’s up?

[Party] Ji9Star: Ew;; Even though I’m the one who said it, I really wanna throw up now lol

[Party] neutaaaa: ㅗ

[Party] Ji9Star: Lmao got you to reply to me.

Normally, only extreme hate would made Yeo-woon instantly lash out like this, so he was just as surprised by what he’d sent. But this was the first time ever that someone had been creep enough to call him a name like that, so maybe it was justified that he reacted on impulse.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Earthguy, why use character emotes when we’re chatting? The others can’t even see them, it’s just me here ㅠㅠ

[Party] Ji9Star: I’m just being myself!

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Also don’t throw kisses at NPCs. That’s gross…

[Party] Ji9Star: Shush!

Silently, Yeo-won agreed with the gross-comment. Even when Earth Star had helped him with the hunting tasks for his second job advancement, he’d constantly used character emotes and tried to act cute in between his skill uses. And while Yeo-woon had taken things seriously and done his best, Earth Star had treated the hunt like a leisurely stroll, sending messages in chat every few seconds.

“So it’s not just me.”

‘Thank god.’

However, he couldn’t help but wonder how there could be a person this immersed in an RPG game. At this point, it wouldn’t surprise him if Earth Star confessed ‘I’ve been an NPC all along.’ But… he had to be a living human being, right?

 ‘But then again… what would a person like this do for a living?’

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Newguy please come to Channel 3’s Isis Palace!

[Party] neutaaaa: Just a sec, gotta check what I still have in the Auction House.

[Party] Ji9Star: You done?

[Party] Ji9Star: You done?

[Party] Ji9Star: I’m ready

[Party] neutaaaa: Just wait… Be patient pls.

[Party] Ji9Star: ㅜㅜ

[Party] Ji9Star: When you gonna be done?

But why the sudden change? Last Yeo-woon checked, Earth Star didn’t want him to be around the other Poseidon members, so he couldn’t help but question why he was in the same party as them now… As Kittycat MeowMeowMeow had requested, he moved from Channel 1 to Channel 3 and used a warp capsule to get to Isis, where CroakRush was already waiting for him in front of the stone pagoda.

As soon as CroakRush, the healer, saw him approach, he jumped in place and activated a buffing skill. His character shut his eyes and lifted his arms over his head and said the skill’s name. This way, a Buff that increased a player’s defense was applied to everyone within the skill’s range.

[Party] CroakRush: There’s a lot of players in Channel 1 right? So there’d be lag

[Party] neutaaaa: Ah right… ‘Cause that’s where people go to trade… ㅜㅜ

[Party] CroakRush: Lmaoo

[Party] CroakRush: Follow me

“I know how to get to the Palace…”

So there was no need for CroakRush to have waited around for him. Still, Yeo-woon followed him, running after the white smoke effect that followed CroakRush’s character wherever he went. Once they stepped through the portal that lead into the Palace, Yeo-woon saw Kittycat MeowMeowMeow casually sitting on the king’s throne, as Earth Star kept himself busy with beating up the king NPC itself. When Kittycat MeowMeowMeow saw them arrive, he leaped out of his seat.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Time to go?

[Party] Ji9Star: Buff me!

[Party] CroakRush: Didn’t you forget something?

[Party] Ji9Star: I’ll pay you >_<

[Party] CroakRush: Ah… dear valued customer ^^ Buffs will be given out at the beginning of the Dungeon so that they won’t lose their effect along the way

‘You get one little party invite out of nowhere and that’s all it takes for you to have no clue what's going on anymore… Where are we even going? With these mismatched levels, no Dungeon would be a good fit for us.’

[Party] neutaaaa: Where are we off to…?

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Earth Star didn’t tell you?

[Party] Ji9Star: ㅠ^ㅠ

[Party] Ji9Star: That person ignores all I say, there’s no way I can tell him anything ㅠ

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Ah…

[Party] Ji9Star: Starting to think he’s ♡paralised by love♡ So he can’t reply to me lmao

[Party] neutaaaa: I’m not gonna respond to that lol

It was always a bad idea to feed people like this, by engaging with them.

[Party] CroakRush: Even without context I can guess: He said nothing useful and just kept calling out for attention lmao

[Party] Ji9Star: No!

[Party] CroakRush: Yes yes

[Party] Ji9Star: No no!

[Party] CroakRush: Don’t pick fights you can’t win

Yeo-woon felt sympathy for CroakRush right away. Earth Star seemed to act the same no matter who was around, so they must be feeling the same resignation Yeo-woon had been saddled with. Though CroakRush seemed surprisingly at ease, in spite of these circumstances.

[Party] CroakRush: I heard you’re tackling the Ant Cave now?

[Party] neutaaaa: Ah yes

[Party] CroakRush: Earth Star hates that map the most because it’s super cramped in there lol

[Party] Ji9Star: True. There’s no height, so you can’t even jump right, and there’s no support aspect either ᄋᄉᄋ; No way a map like that is meant to exist!

[Party] CroakRush: So we’re here to help lol Earth Star said Newta has to be raised quickly

[Party] neutaaaa: Me?

[Party] neutaaaa: Why raise me?

[Party] CroakRush: Mmm maybe fattening you up with exp and then he’ll eat you

[Party] neutaaaa: ;;

‘…Raising me? Isn’t this the opposite of what you said before, Earth? Is this really the same guy who told me to stay away from other Poseidon members, who’s now putting me with guild members just to make things easier?’

[Party] Ji9Star: Oh, fyi

[Party] Ji9Star: This is an exception. Because I’m doing this for myself, not you.

[Party] Ji9Star: So don’t get it twisted haha.

[Party] neutaaaa: ??

[Party] Ji9Star: I mean

[Party] Ji9Star: You saw that post about the Springfield event Dungeon?

[Party] neutaaaa: ???

[Party] Ji9Star: The new couple event went live this morning! I’ll send a link

[Party] Ji9Star: Oh wait, can’t send links in game…

[Party] Ji9Star: Welp… What now?

“Ah… Couple event.”

Thinking back on it, Yeo-woon remembered seeing it in the update notice. He couldn’t recall the full name, just something wIth Springfield… But it was only some random Couple event, so how could it be fun? Wasn’t it obvious that it’d just be filler content?

[Party] Ji9Star: They made an event Dungeon that only couples can access.

[Party] neutaaaa: Ah… I saw that on the way here.

He’d seen a portal that hadn’t appeared in the palace before this day. But with CroakRush running ahead, he’d been unable to check it out. It seemed like that was the event Dungeon.

[Party] Ji9Star: It’s a Dungeon for couples, but the item drops change depending on the level of the Dungeon

[Party] Ji9Star: And they said you can get a Legendary Reinforcement Puzzle in the lv 220 one.

[Party] Ji9Star: That thing increases the chance of successfully enhancing lvl 9 equipment by a whole 30%…!

‘Is that good?’

[Party] Ji9Star: Ahh I want it

[Party] neutaaaa: Then get it?

[Party] Ji9Star: You can’t get it just because you want it.

[Party] neutaaaa: ?

[Party] Ji9Star: Even if you buy all the ones sold by players, there’s so few ㅡㅡ

[Party] neutaaaa: So let’s go?

[Party] Ji9Star: ㅡㅡ Says the dude too low-lvl to enter.

[Party] neutaaaa: Then go alone ig.

[Party] Ji9Star: You can’t go in alone ㅠ

“You can’t go alone?”

Yeo-woon finally understood the issue. That item could only drop in an event map that could only be accessed by players at level 220 or above, and in order to enter it, your partner also had to be on level 220 or higher.

[Party] neutaaaa: If we break up, you can go form a couple with someone that’s above 220, right?

[Party] neutaaaa: Like that frog here who’s over 220 too…

[Party] CroakRush: I don’t like him like that; And I’m not some frog I’m a cute bug;;

[Party] neutaaaa: Sigh…

[Party] CroakRush: Earth is too annoying for that

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Agreed

[Party] CroakRush: You know it firsthand Newta

[Party] neutaaaa: Oh, I’m glad you agree ^^

[Party] CroakRush: Well there’s no arguments for the other side lol

[Party] Ji9Star: All of you just live to make me hurt istg

No matter how he thought about it, the most efficient way seemed to be for Earth Star to find someone else on the same level as him, maybe even within the guild, so that he could form a couple with them instead. But Earth Star didn’t seem all that popular with his guild members because of what an annoyance he was to be around.

[Party] neutaaaa: But why is everyone here? Wouldn’t Earth Star be enough?

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: I gotta be here for a quest anyway ㅡㅡ

[Party] Ji9Star: Lol you wanna be alone with me instead?

[Party] Ji9Star: Just pick the time and date, baby

[Party] neutaaaa: ? date = time

[Party] CroakRush: Lmfaoooo it’s time and place

[Party] Ji9Star: Anyway; Just pick;

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Lmaoooooo

Earth Star got so embarrassed that he left the palace map right away by himself. And before 10 seconds had passed, he was back again and running back and forth from one NPC to the next.

[Party] neutaaaa: If you guys have stuff to do, you don’t gotta stay.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: My quest is in the Ant Cave.

[Party] CroakRush: I get paid by the minute so don’t mind me

[Party] Ji9Star: Still a cheaper rate than chugging MP potions all day!

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Lmaooooo

[Party] CroakRush: What a bastard

Still, Yeo-woon felt relieved that everyone was gaining something. He’d feel guilty to rope so many people into helping him, if they didn’t get something out of it too. Right before using a Warp Capsule to get directly to the Ant Cave, a thought struck him.

[Party] neutaaaa: But even once we match that Dungeon’s level requirements

[Party] Ji9Star: ᄋᄋ?

[Party] neutaaaa: Aren’t you just gonna force me into endless runs, until you’ve farmed enough of that item?

[Party] neutaaaa: But that sounds really annoying, so why would I do that with you?

[Party] Ji9Star: That’s why I hate quick-witted ppl like you ㅡㅡ

So he was right. If this really was a rare item drop and not one that many people sold either, then it only made sense they’d have to farm that Dungeon for hours, just for a single one of these items. The mere thought of it all felt incredibly boring and like a waste of time already.

[Party] neutaaaa: Then what are you offering in return?

[Party] Ji9Star: Lol ig raising you up isn’t enough for you?

[Party] Ji9Star: Want my phone number then?

[Party] Ji9Star: But sadly for you~ That’s not up for grabs~! >_<

[Party] neutaaaa: ? Even if it was, I wouldn’t want it.

[Party] Ji9Star: So what then? Money??

‘How about getting away from you? I’d even give all my earthly possessions, if that’s what it’d take.’

Of course Yeo-woon could just break up their couple himself and try to stay away from this player, but judging by Earth Star’s actions so far, he wouldn’t let him get away that easily. Because as far as Yeo-woon could tell, Earth Star didn’t hide or ignore it whenever he felt malicious towards someone, but just indulged it in plain view of everyone.

So, there was only one way out that Yeo-woon could think of.

‘Halloween Eggplant joined the party.’

‘Impeatuous Peatection joined the party.’

[Party] neutaaaa: Please break up with me when the event ends.

Once he’d typed and sent his message, Yeo-woon noticed their party had increased by two members. Both were part of the Poseidon guild and people he had on his Friends List. Their timing was impressive.

[Party] Halloween Eggplant: hahahahahahahahahahahaha

[Party] Halloween Eggplant: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Party] Impeatuous Peatection: Stumbling right into a trainwreck

[Party] Impeatuous Peatection: Sounds like arranged marriage lol

[Party] Impeatuous Peatection: What’s the title of this historical drama?

[Party] Halloween Eggplant: Damn, that was funny.

[Party] Ji9Star: So much noise; Why’d you come anyway?

[Party] CroakRush: Got bored so I invited them to watch with us.

[Party] CroakRush: I think you guys forgot we’re here too haha;

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Frfr... I felt like a third wheel ㅜ ㅜ

‘Halloween Eggplant has left the party.’

‘Impeatuous Peatection has left the party.’

‘The party size has been changed from 8 to 4.’

After Earth Star kicked their newest party members, he also changed the party’s settings in general.

[Party] Ji9Star: Bastard

[Party] Ji9Star: So you want me to be the loser in the end?

[Party] Ji9Star: I raise your level and give you a job upgrade and now I suddenly have to break up with you?? You’re so cheap ㅡㅡ

[Party] neutaaaa: So you like me? Lol

[Party] Ji9Star: Nm let’s break up;

[Party] neutaaaa: Nice

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Lmaoooooo

[Party] CroakRush: Lmaoooo

[Party] Ji9Star: You better be a silent cat, bc if you tell anyone on guild chat, I’ll get my ears scolded off;;;;

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: If I gotta...

[Party] CroakRush: Don’t let him intimidate you! Here I’ll do it for you.

[Party] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Woo!

And just a little later, Yeo-woon got a whisper from Captain Poseidon, who said he was really, really sorry. But this time, Yeo-woon actually didn’t mind it. Earth Star had kind of agreed to breaking up, right? So it was only a matter of time.

‘If it’s to get this awful guy away from me, I’ll show a kind of motivation no one’s ever seen before.’

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 6+7

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

(They're both short, so you get them at once lmao.) Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun. So I hope you have fun reading!

“Ugh….”

Yeo-woon woke up to the sound of an incoming text, so he blearily reached for his phone. Once he saw what it said, he shot up, eyes wide open and any thought of sleep wiped from his brain.

[Mobile notification client]

Hello, Yeo-woon Lee,

This is the ATB Recruiting Service.

Congratulations on passing the document stage.

The interview schedule has been e-mailed to you.

“...‘In it, you will find the time and date of your interview, so please check it to make sure everything is in order.’”

He had submitted his documents to this job posting just a week ago, but the message assured him they had been accepted.

“What!”

Suddenly, he felt more awake than ever. He would’ve never thought this job could work out. He’d sent that application just in case, but now they wanted to interview him and somehow, he felt more scared than excited about it…

There’s countless ways for a person to fail an interview, so did it even matter that he passed the document stage? But getting better at interviews required practice, so it would be good to go, no matter the outcome. He’d only had one interview so far in his life and that had been for a part-time job at some PC cafe.

His heart felt like it was trying to beat out of his chest.

‘What should I wear to the interview? A formal suit would be best, but do I even have one at my place?’

Yeo-woon scrambled for the closet doors, to see whether he would have to make the long trip to his parents’ house.

“…Ah, thank goodness.”

Fortunately, the clothes in question were clear to see the moment he opened the closet, tidily hung up after their last trip to the dry cleaners, even encased in a protective plastic bag that was keeping them in perfect condition.

.***.

The interview’s location wasn’t that far away, but it still took three commutes via subway. All in all, 45 minutes. Even though he had to switch trains at a very popular station, he still got lucky, since it was the late afternoon and so there were few people on the subway.

‘Ahh, what if this actually works out?’

His head hurt just thinking about the daily subway commute in the morning…

‘What if I get accepted in another location altogether? I do need to re-sign my apartment’s lease soon, since it’s about to end. Should I just move somewhere else, instead of extending the lease?’

Yeo-woon stared down at his phone screen, while he daydreamed like this in his head. He responded with some emojis to a chat message from a friend, looked at some news articles and finally went on Illusion’s official website. There was a new announcement, posted just 30 minutes ago and detailing the next update, both with patch notes and information about the upcoming events.

Title: April 9th Update Notice

Author: GM Lemon

Hello, adventurers! GM Lemon here.

This is the advance information on the update we have scheduled for April 9th. There will be new events for our adventurers and even some new episodes for specific character jobs to look forward to!

[Events]

*An Experience Boost Buff will be active for 1 hour, once you log into the game after the update.

*The ‘Spring is everywhere with you! [Springfield]’ Couple Event will be added for a limited time.

*‘March’s White Day Royal Draw (Cash)’ will be removed from the Fashion Shop. (Buffs and items received from the draw will not be affected by this.)

*The story and job advancement quests for the 4th job (Valkyrie) of the Explorer class will be added.

*Outfits for the theme ‘May Bride/Groom’ will be added to the Fashion Shop.

[Bug fixes]

*Fixed the visual error of the Hero job’s ‘Shadow Dot’ bouncing around.

*Adjusted the range on the Valkyrie job’s ‘Pull’ skill.

*Fixed an issue where in Aquarium maps 1-4 the environment’s Movement Debuff applied to a character could be removed by riding the new mount ‘Black Tiger’.

*Fixed an issue where the Auction House’s Sales tab would stutter under specific circumstances.

All servers will go into maintenance, to apply updates and for the purpose of server-stabilisation, from 10 AM to 12 PM on April 9th. Please remember to log out before maintenance starts, to avoid any potential loss to your invaluable account information and progress!

Good luck and travel far, adventurers!

(Comments have been disabled for this post)

Yeo-woon skimmed over the notes, realizing there were some new events about to be added and bugs they were about to correct.

‘No clue what those bugs are, but they should’ve been fixed ages ago! The event is brand new, so it’s gotta be great. It’ll be really fun! I can’t wait to play it.’

Those were Yeo-woon’s vague thoughts, before he closed back out of that webpage. There had been an event preview attached to the post, but he wanted to wait until he could play it all himself. It would feel more immersive that way.

“Did I get here too early?”

He had overestimated his chances of getting lost along the way, so now he was at the location way too early. He still had to wait one and a half hours until his interview would start, but he had no clue where to go until then.

So he tried to find a nice cafe to relax in for a while, but the first one he entered had no tables left for him. Following the map app on his phone to the next closest cafe, Yeo-woon crossed a street and ended up in a more residential area.

‘Is there really a cafe around here?’

The buildings all looked expensive and fancy, so he wouldn’t have expected a normal cafe to be around here. He checked and re-checked his map, just to make sure he wasn’t in the wrong place, because the atmosphere here was very different to the crowded industrial district on the other side of the street.

‘Is this restaurant hidden within a building? There’s so few pictures and they only show the inside… So maybe it really is hidden.’

“…”

‘I think I’m lost. My map isn’t updating anymore either… It has to be close by, but there’s no place around here that looks like a cafe…’

“Ah, my internet…”

Yeo-woon repeatedly tapped on the compass function on his map, hoping to update where exactly he was, but it seemed the map app had given up on him entirely now. He tried turning his mobile data off and back on again, but there was no change and a quick check told him there was no local Wi-Fi he could connect to either… That’s when he noticed a man squatting on the asphalt, some paces ahead of him.

‘Okay, let’s just ask for directions.’

He was probably someone that lived around these parts and would know where to find the cafe. Yeo-woon carefully approached the man, ready to crouch down so they could talk eye-to-eye, when he suddenly heard a camera’s shutter.

“...?”

Click, click, click, click, click, click!

Yeo-woon’s steps slowed as he heard the noise again and again, like the man was taking a neverending string of photos. Once he got even closer, Yeo-woon saw the man was holding a cell phone the size of his own palm, and the subject he was photographing so zealously was a kitten, small enough that it was the same height as the phone dangling in front of it. The tiny black thing was enthusiastically eating something, its whole head nearly disappearing in a bowl that was probably more used to housing side dishes than cat food. When the cat heard the shutter go off, it raised its head and looked right at the man, who covered his mouth and muttered something under his breath.

‘Looks like he’s busy feeding that cat. Is it okay for me to interrupt? Or should I try to find a different person to ask?’

As he thought through his options, Yeo-woon looked up and down the street, but there was no other living creatures around, other than himself, that man and his kitten.

‘I can’t keep going like this…’

He still had a little more than an hour left and his legs were starting to hurt from searching for a cafe and he still needed to walk back to his interview afterwards. So, Yeo-woon quietly approached the man, who had his back turned to him, and tapped him on the shoulder.

“Ahhh! What is-?! Why?!”

“….”

The man got way more spooked than Yeo-woon had expected him to, flinching hard and even falling on his butt. A part of Yeo-woon wanted to apologize right away, but after hearing a scream that loud, he was rendered speechless. With a reaction like this, people would think he’d tried to burn the man alive, not tapped his shoulder to ask him a question.

“Who are you?!”

The man fiercely glared at him, his expression radiating more distrust than Yeo-woon would have thought possible to convey, with just a person’s face.

Outside of that and his obvious shock, the man carried an air of tiredness and defensiveness, wearing black piercings in both of his ears. Even with a quick glance, Yeo-woon could tell there must be more than three on each side. And his forehead, clearly visible thanks to the hat that was holding back his hair, wrinkled more and more heavily, the more time passed.

‘Ah, that’s… scary.’

Yeo-woon gulped heavily, his own flawed prejudice telling him this had been a very bad mistake.

‘I think I might be screwed. Ahh I really picked the worst person…’

“It’s nothing.”

Yeo-woon gave an awkward smile and took a step away from this person on pure instinct.

‘I haven’t felt this way since college, when that group of high schoolers on motorcycles were trying to rob me…’

As a highschooler, he’d been really scared of elementary school kids, and in college, he became really scared of middle schoolers, but by now it had progressed and he was just scared of every young person that might not have a future.

Of course, this man wasn’t really the same as those high school robbers, but the way he glared at Yeo-woon still made him want to run for the hills.

“No, maybe there is something… That was a really loud scream, are you okay?”

“…”

“Uh, sorry for the surprise, sir.”

‘It’s not like I… hit him or anything. …Did I? I… just tapped his shoulder, right?’

By this point, the cat had fled the alley, knocking over the bowl in its mad dash to get away. The man stared after it and sighed, then he got up from his squat dusting off his legs. Yeo-woon hadn’t noticed before, because they were both squatted down, but the man was taller than him, which made him seem even more intimidating.

‘I didn’t mean to cause this. And I just lightly tapped him with my finger, didn’t I? That’s not like hitting someone, is it…?’

“I just wanted to ask where I need to go.”

“Map?”

Yeo-woon nodded and held out his phone that was still showing the map app and the cafe he had tried to reach. The man stared down at the screen with sharp eyes and then his eyebrows subtly rose.

“You’re going there?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“What? To get a coffee…”

‘Why does someone normally go to a cafe? Do you go to cafes to enjoy a nice bath?’

It was the sort of question a person could only ask, if they didn’t think about what they were saying. The man’s lips twitched a little, but he pushed them right back into their previous frown and then just turned his whole head away.

“…It’s not in this alley. This way.”

He took the bowl with the cat food, which still held a good amount of food in spite of how it got knocked over, and placed it closer to the corner of the alley. Then he lead the way out of it, without even a backwards glance. Yeo-woon felt like the awkwardness of this whole situation might kill him. Were all the people in this neighbourhood this rude, or did he find the one person who refused to be social?

‘Please just say something.’

Yeo-woon grumbled in his mind. But the man didn’t even look his way, too busy staring at his own phone, before he muttered a low:

“This game…”

They walked straight ahead, then turned left two blocks further down. The brightly labeled ‘Cafe Earth’ came into view, right at the entrance of the street. When Yeo-woon turned back to thank the man for his help, he could only watch him speed off towards a different building, further away. He had nearly reached its door already, so he must’ve left Yeo-woon behind as soon as the cafe became visible.

‘Ah. Dude, you really have zero social skill.’

With that complaint out of the way, Yeo-woon finally got to enter the cafe. In the end, the coffee’s taste was fairly average and the same went for the atmosphere. There was a decent variety, but the most surprising part was that all the seats were full.

‘Wonder how they do this. Is it thanks to some secret sales technique?’

Over the next 30 minutes, Yeo-woon mindlessly doodled on some paper as he mentally reviewed the potential interview questions and what answers he should give. When he came back to reality, he stared in surprise at the paper. Without noticing it, he’d drawn a glaring, defensive-looking man onto it.

“…”

‘What… Why did I draw this?’

After looking the drawing over for a bit, Yeo-woon used his pen to poke the small dot under the drawing’s left eye. Then, he flipped the paper over.

(Next Part(s))

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 5

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Now onto the story:

Title: It’s that guild again

Written by: QualityCakeTime [Hero]

(Screenshot_0003820.jpg)

Remember Poseidon? They’re looking for new members.

I hope no one stumbles into them without knowing what happened haha. This is my warning for all of you, at least.

(65 comments)

-I saw one of their guys in town and he was crazy fast… Shouldn’t that be a bug?

⤷Hey @Illusion Gameplay Are there any more speed bugs right now, other than that one with the new mount?

⤷If it was a legit bug, like what that one Staff did, it would’ve been discovered by others and removed by now. The devs patch up every cool exploit we find… Even the Staff got nerfed in the end.

⤷Maybe off topic, but… I heard you can even fly when you chain specific skills in some way?

⤷⤷Don’t most skills have movement attached anyway?

⤷Is there maybe a mount to be that fast all the time? Because a normal skill would have the usual 40sec cooldown, right?

-Why? Poseidon is a ranked guild, what did they do? You have to say what happened, if you want people to listen to you.

⤷Did you break both your hands? Go search the forums, don’t expect others to spoon-feed you everything. It’s literally right there.

⤷⤷Can you give a link pls? I found tons of posts, but they’re all just full of rumors…

-What a cool promo-post, imma try to get in~ Their conditions aren’t that high anyway, so why not lol, isn’t it easy af as long as you’re the right level? Time to join!

⤷When you inevitably come crying back, just remember we told you so.

⤷Their interviews feel more stressful than the ones at actual large companies.

⤷If there are job seekers or high school senions here, it’s a good guild to apply to for interview practice! The questions are so stupid that it really helps you practice thinking on your feet! I applied three times and got rejected all three - but did I ace the actual interview for my current job thanks to this;;

⤷⤷Madlad lmao you’re too much

⤷⤷No way. What are you even saying? lmaooooooo

⤷⤷⤷I mean lmao, it’s true tho lmaooo That was the first time I met a guild with a personality test in their interview haha

⤷⤷Ah, whatever, sure. What’s the harm anyway? Getting some free practice in? lmaoooo

-Poseidon is evil lol. They recruit you for the ranked season and then throw you out once it’s over, to keep only the buffs you earned them. They take all your effort for themselves… ㅠ Don’t be fooled into joining just because they got some top rankers. Those are og members and new ones are just temporary workhorses for them. If you really go in, they’ll probs just take advantage of you and throw you away like trash after, got it?

⤷Also there’s some kids who got talked into spamming paid boosts for extra guild points as soon as they joined. The regulars save on money by having only newbies boost.

⤷⤷Ugh that’s the worst people. They’re really like that… Thought it was just rumors

⤷⤷LOL But I heard those kids were also pretty sus.

⤷⤷⤷Hi Poseidon

⤷⤷⤷⤷F lmao

⤷⤷⤷Anonymous comment. Because Poseidon totally knows how to be subtle lmao.

-I’m too curious. What do they actually ask you in those interviews? Not that I want to join, I just really wanna know! I’m thinking about switching jobs so…

⤷Lmaoooo Tried and failed last month lol. Was asked about strengths and weaknesses. So, I told them I’m weak against heroes, but make up for it with strong+shiny equipment, so I’m really good against single-target DPS in PvP! But turns out they wanted strengths and weaknesses of my personality…; But when people ask you your strengths and weaknesses while in a game, isn’t it normal to assume what I did? ㅠㅠ And there’s no time to search up answers, because one of them is like a human stopwatch… Only those who can type 400 wpm or higher should try this.

⤷⤷Weirdos lmaooo

⤷⤷Wdym stopwatch?

⤷⤷⤷You only have a limited time to answer and they count you down the whole way;

⤷⤷⤷⤷That’s insane lmaoooo

⤷⤷They asked me about my thoughts on the 4th Industrial Revolution, but I had no clue what it was, so I didn’t know what to say;

⤷⤷⤷Weirdos lmaooooo

⤷⤷⤷Are we applying for a doctor’s thesis here? Lol why are they asking so much stuff?

⤷⤷⤷⤷Fuck, then I can’t even join once I get my degree, because it’s only a bachelor’s;

⤷⤷This. There’s one bastard who types stupid fast lol. And some kid who looked like Isis kept going 5 4 3 2 1 so I got kinda nervous and just left.

⤷They asked me if I prefer dogs or cats lol. I told them I don’t like either because they’re too much work and eat too much, so I prefer small and cute hamsters! They told me I should learn to love all animals equally and then kicked me from the party… Like, were they actually looking for new people or do they just want to mess with everyone?

(Next Part(s))

[sic-fayl]

So... this is just how I imagine the first meeting/introductions between Satoru and Suguru could've maybe gone (well... assuming there's no canon answer for that, because if there is, then damn am I uninformed lmao).

But anyway: Short story! First meeting between these guys! Hope you enjoy! :3

There wasn't any warning for the biggest change in Satoru's life. In fact, the day had started out as monotonous as any before. And there had been many:

First in his life, he spent his days alone, training with specially-hired sorcerers - boring, all of it. It was a bit pathetic to see, actually... They apparently exorcised dangerous Curses as a job, but couldn’t even keep up with a kid’s untamed skills? So boring.

Then he was shoved off to Jujutsu Tech (“for hands-on practice”) where he was one of only two students in the first year. Shoko Ieiri was the other one and she was apparently really good at Reverse Technique and that was the reason she got recruited by the school. So of course she had no real fighting skills whatsoever... So, from here on out, Satoru's only opponents would be some stupid Curses - and no way that’d be any less boring than the trained, smart socerers he'd fought before.

In summary: everything was very, very boring in his life - not disappointing though, because Satoru had been told all along what to expect: He was born to be the strongest - winner of the genetic lottery with high perception, strong skills and impeccable training thanks to his rich family.

He'd realized early on that this also meant no one and nothing could truly keep up with him - but it was still an annoying little fact.

And then... Geto Suguru showed up.

A suprise student, recruited mere days ago, still getting his paperwork in order. His luggage (only one bag, how strange) right by his side because he'd arrived on campus just an hour ago - but still, there was a little half-smile on his face as their teacher introduced him as the newest first year, Geto Suguru. But the guy’s eyes stayed cold even with the smile on his lips - a face like that one Relations teacher Satoru used to have, who'd just waited for him to make the slightest mistake, so he could chew out the oh-so-prestigious Gojo heir.

So, Satoru frowned and thought really? Some strict, backwater random? And decided this would suck - and so, as the admittedly-pampered, famous son of a huge clan, he... was maybe a bit brattier about the situation than he’d needed to be, in retrospect.

That's how everything started. Because Satoru dramatically slumped over, once introductions were finished, and opened his dumbass mouth to bemoan: "Sensei, will we really have to babysit this Suguru guy right until he eventually messes up and can finally be sent back home? Can't he just leave now and save us all the trouble?"

Their teacher's brows twitched, an angry frown building on his face - and Satoru had expected that. Had done this just to see the frown and get yelled at, even, because that was the most fun thing at Jujutsu Tech so far.

Because the man clearly cared about politeness, but it was that very politeness (and the Gojo name) that kept him from actually pulling out the big guns against Satoru. Even though that would have to be glorious to see!

So just three days into the school year, Satoru was already commited to push him to his limit. He just had to see him snap! But so far, all his poking and prodding hadn’t made their teacher explode yet... but he could see the cracks forming everywhere over time - and that's what made it so fun to keep up!

So, if Satoru could get more of this fun by taking digs at the new asshole, all the better!

"Gojo-" The man started, his low tone spawning a smile on Satoru's face - full of fangs and only-slightly-suppressed manic glee.

But then he got interrupted. Almost instantly. By a voice soaked in fake nonchalance:

"What did you say your name was?"

The new guy. He wasn't really smiling anymore - it looked more like an aloof grimace. One of Satoru's aunts had the same expression, whenever she had to deal with a particularly stupid servant. So, of course, Satoru just frowned and scoffed, not bothering to answer.

People like this just loved their dramatics, so Satoru guessed the question was rhethorical - no way he didn't know who Satoru was, even if this dude was just some unimportant nobody from the middle of nowhere. Everyone knew about Satoru.

Shoko thought so too, if her bored explanation was anything to go by:

"He's Gojo. You know, that way too famous one? Gojo Satoru."

But the new kid just calmly nodded, no hint of recogniting on his face. What a fucking weirdo, Satoru thought - but that was before he heard the next words:

"Right. Satoru, I have just as much of a right to be here as everyone else. And if you want me gone that bad...", he paused, the polite sneer on his face transforming into a challenging grin instead. "...then I assume it's because you're really weak yourself and want as few witnesses as possible, for when you eventually fail and have to leave."

In the first split second, Satoru froze. There were... a lot a thoughts and yet, none at all at the same time, racing through his mind: This wasn't part of the script - assholes like this guy always stuck to the script, what the fuck was wrong with this one? And he had called him Satoru, no one called him Satoru, what the fuck, how dare he? And had he really just called Satoru a failure? Satoru, a failure?! How dare he?

So, in all honesty (and even though Satoru would later deny it, because no, no, he'd never do something that thoughtless! He carefully considered it first because it was a reasonable choice actually, see?) he impulsively lashed out, already throwing a punch at the guy before he'd fully processed that he wanted to.

For the shortest moment, all of Satoru's mind was taken up by the offended "Gojo!" coming from his teacher - because that tone told him this would definitely lead to detention, if not worse.

But worst of all: A black eye on a classmate, a report back to his family - an impulsive mistake he'd somehow have to explain away as not impulsive, because otherwise those fucking lessons in control would make a grand (horrible) return.

He was trying to think up the first of many arguments he’d need -his fist so close to colliding with that stupid face- when the guy just... dodged his punch. Looking perfectly at ease, as he did it.

Like he'd had all the time in the world to move. Like this was normal.

And then he raised his own hands and Satoru naturally fell into a pattern of defending with his Technique, while looking for openings to land some punches after all - amidst this mess, the even more offended "Geto!" their teacher squacked out went ignored by them both.

All of this was so unexpected, Satoru honestly wanted to laugh. (Screw their teacher, this was the most fun he'd had at school yet!)

But the thing was... the new guy was actually good at hand-to-hand: Strong, precise hits at every weak spot Satoru left open -Limitless raising the air’s density at each new strike-point to keep it from connecting with him, but only barely in time and only for the duration of the punch, because it took conscious focus to maintain them- and so there was no time Satoru could spend on laughing, unless he wanted to fully disengage and just hide behind a full barrier of densely-packed air, instead of the tiny punch-sized pockets he was creating so far.

But then he'd have to give this up and he didn't want to.

It was too much fun. So unexpected, so fucking good. He wanted more. He wanted all of it. He wanted this guy as his exclusive sparring partner for the rest of the year.

But Satoru was getting exhausted - he never had to use his body this much, since most fights could easily be won from a distance, with his Cursed Technique. Most enemies could be held back with Limitless, especially since he could see them coming from anywhere, thanks to his Six Eyes -though Satoru was working on another, more refined solution for shielding himself- and so he wasn’t used to moving and dodging and punching back with his hands.

Because he had all kinds of other advantages, so why not use them instead, right? But this was... so much fun. He never knew it could be fun - much less shared fun, going by the focused smile on his opponent's face.

But his physical endurance just wasn’t having it and he couldn’t lose this match. He had to end the fight quickly - especially since the guy had caught on to Satoru's exhaustion and was now pushing harder, faster, like he knew he could win, if they just kept on going like this...

So Satoru changed the fight up: He took first one, then two steps back, using Limitless to hugely densify the air close to the ground, between him and the other. Predictably, the new guy crashed right into it, in his pursuit - and Satoru used the moment of surprise to push him fully to the ground, Limitless keeping the guy's wrists and legs bound in place with thin bands of air, too dense to escape.

"Who's a failure now?" Satoru jeered, kneeling right above him, so he could better glare at the guy.

And sure, maybe he'd used kind of a dirty tactic to win - but all of it were natural parts of his skillset, so wasn't it only fair he got to use them too? The new guy seemed to disagree, if his snarled words were anything to go by:

"Cheater. You only won because you used your Cursed Technique." And that made Satoru scoff, because so what?

"You're just a sore loser. We never agreed not to use Cursed Techniques." Not that Satoru even could agree to terms like that, with his sight the way it was and all... "You could've used yours too!"

"I can't!" He snarled back, his glare even more fierce now and... honestly, just... what was up with this guy?

"How... Why are you here, if you can't even use your own goddamn Cursed Technique?"

That got an angry growl out of the guy, so Satoru just growled right back - two could play at this game and he wouldn’t let some angry guy get the last growl! Especially not one who couldn’t even use his own Technique!

It was only when he heard a faint, decidedly less-bored-than-usual "What the fuck..." from their other classmate that he remembered… that it wasn't all that normal for two people to just growl at each other, huh?

That made two impulsive slip-ups in just one morning... Satoru would've worried about it - but thankfully, the guy chose that moment to switch back to actual words:

"That's not what I meant - I can't use it here without triggering all the alarms."

The statement took him a few embarrassingly long seconds to process. Because the school's alarms were not made to go off for Cursed Energy itself - if they were, they'd be blaring all day long. No, they were meant to detect Curses themselves, so how could the alarm possibly-

Then it clicked. And the realisation left him breathless.

"No way." He got out anyway because it had to be said.

Satoru was already that one special sorcerer of this millenia to carry both Limitless and the Six Eyes. So what were the chances that the once-every-other-generation sorcerer with Curse Manipulation would not only be born around the same time as him, but also in the same country, so they could now attend the same school?

There was no fucking way, right?

But even after Satoru had released the guy's airy shackles and lend him a hand, so they could both get back on their feet, the dude still didn't correct himself. Instead, he sneered and said, near flippantly: "I'd prove it, but then we'd all get evacuted."

And...

Well, in truth, it had been a long time coming at this point, even if it still weirded out everyone else in the room - but after everything? And then a statement like that? One that reminded Satoru of himself, in how casually it implied absolute power over a whole system?

Satoru burst out laughing. Hard. Like a maniac.

He didn't even mind that it made the guy pull his hand out of his grasp - the one they'd somehow forgotten about, after he pulled him to his feet.

He didn't even mind that it made all three other people in the room stare at him like he'd gone insane.

But only one of them spoke. The one right in front of him, even if the words were only a halfhearted murmur:

"You're so fucking weird."

And that just made Satoru laugh even harder.

School would be so much fucking fun!

(Now, if only he could remember what the dude's name was again...)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 4

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Back to the story:

Yeo-woon had been busy collecting things from the Auction House in its dialogue window. A few hours ago, one of his auctions finished up and now Yeo-woon had finally found the time to log into the game and collect his earnings.

However, after he had collected them and closed the dialogue window, he was surprised to see a whole group of people next to his own character, with one in particular standing right in front of him. It almost felt like they’d appeared out of nowhere.

And then there was the fact that these person couldn’t have known that Yeo-woon had just finished up his business with the Auction House a moment ago. Or in other words, that he had just now noticed the group’s presence. Instead, these people must have arrived here just a second ago, by concidence at perfectly the right time for Yeo-woon to spot them right away. That was the only possible explanation for the speech bubble that immediately appeared above the person closest to him.

[All] Ji9Star: Hey!!

‘Ah, there we go. I’m sure the Guild Master chewed you out for what you did, right? So you’re here to finally apologize for real?’

Yeo-woon couldn’t help but cackle a little - or maybe more than just ‘a little’, considering that, by the end, the corners of his lips had stretched as close to his ears as they could get…

[All] Ji9Star: Hahaha really now

[All] Ji9Star: Why are you doing this to me? ㅠ_ㅠ

[All] Ji9Star: So you don’t know me?

It was obvious Earth Star had to be fuming behind his screen.

‘Good, you bastard…’

[All] Ji9Star: You really don’t know me?

[All] neutaaaa: Lmao no?

[All] Ji9Star: Well then

[All] Ji9Star: Let’s change that!

‘Ji9Star wants to start a relationship with you! Do you accept?’

Just then, a notification popped up on the screen with a cute noise.

‘A… Friend Request sent by Earth Star… is not what this is. He wants a relationship?’

“...what?”

[All] Halloween Eggplant: ?? Did you go insane for real?? lmaoooo

Below the notification window, Earth Star’s character had bent down on one knee and was holding a ring in his outstretched hands, as if presenting it to Yeo-woon’s own character.

And the whole Poseidon guild was assembled behind Earth Star, the little Poseidon guild icon visible above each of their usernames and making it easy to tell them apart from the rest of the users milling about the village.

[All] CroakRush: ??? Lmaooooooo

[All] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: I was eating ramen, but someone said Earth was gonna apologize. Never seen an apology like this…

[All] CroakRush: What kind did you get?

[All] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Spicy beef soup!

[All] CroakRush: Ah that’s delicious… Especially when you get the undercooking part of the recipe just right!

[All] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Undercooking?

[All] CroakRush: Ah such a clueless cat…

Each of the different characters had their own shining outfit with unique special effects and they seemed a bit overwhelming because of it. Yeo-woon felt unnecessarily intimidated, with all these fancy characters surrounding his own plain one.

[All] Impeatuous Peatection: Lmaoo Earth’s actually gone off the deep end. Yesterday was bad, but today is somehow worse.

[All] Impeatuous Peatection: A legit shotgun proposal waa

[All] Captain Poseidon: …

[All] CroakRush: What even is this? He finally broke our guild master ㅠ lmaooooo

[All] Halloween Eggplant: My screenshot button doesn’t work… Pls someone else immortalize this mess for me?

[All] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: On it

[All] Halloween Eggplant: Tyty

‘Is this the cyberbullying that schools and parents warn you about? Isn’t it unfair, to bring all your friends when you go make fun of someone…?’

There were a lot of Poseidon guild members around him and he was sure they had to be on Earth Star’s side. And in contrast, Yeo-woon himself didn’t have a single gaming buddy. Normally, he didn’t care either, but in this situation, even he felt like it’d be nice to have someone to call in as reinforcement…

[All] Ji9Star: Will you accept my proposal?

[All] neutaaaa: No.

[All] Ji9Star: I bought 50 rings for this. Think I’ll need more? >_<

‘Fifty…?’

Yeo-woon blinked and stared at the information on his screen, the Relationship notification still big and bright in the middle of it all.

‘Why is he suddenly…? What the hell is that guy planning?’

These steadily increasing worries made his skin crawl.

‘You rejected the relationship. The Confession Rejection buff will be active for the next 10 minutes!’

‘Minimum Attack Damage increased by 25%’

[All] Halloween Eggplant: He got kicked to the curb lmaooo

[All] CroakRush: Lmaoooo

[All] Impeatuous Peatection: Lmaoooo

[All] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Valid. Who’d wanna be stuck with Earth?

[All] Ji9Star: 4,9k won wasted ㅠoㅠ

[All] Impeatuous Peatection: So? You still got 49 anyway.

[All] Ji9Star: 5k won is like 20 pulls in the Royal Draw tho ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

The Royal Draw was a lottery ticket. The item could be bought at stores in the game, but only for 200won of real money. When Yeo-woon read Earth Star’s words, he realized this 4,900won ring must be another item like that and only available to people willing to use real money for it.

“That’s crazy. One of these costs actual 4,900won? 4,900won for some rejectable one-time-use dating item?”

When someone really seriously thought about it, 4,900won wasn’t that much money, but when it was spent on something in a game it suddenly felt like a way higher amount to Yeo-woon.

‘Ji9Star wants to start a relationship with you! Do you accept?’

Earth Star was using an item here that was worth 4,900won… But then again, no matter how a part of Yeo-woon wanted to fold under the item’s price, it also felt more than a little unfair. Earth Star was the one who had started their whole conflict in the first place, and then hadn’t seriously apologized for his actions either…

‘So why do I feel like I'm the one being punished now?’

[All] neutaaaa: Why are you doing this to me?

[All] Ji9Star: Lmaooooo

[All] Ji9Star: Because our guild master said I have to show my sincerity in front of everyone

[All] Captain Poseidon: ?

[All] Ji9Star: So here I am, showing you my sincerity ♡

Somehow, the heart at the end of the sentence didn’t look natural at all… and resembled a skull split in half way more than a heart… so it just looked like an omen of even worse things to come, nothing positive about it at all…

‘Are you secretly planning to have me assassinated?’

[All] Captain Poseidon: When did I say that…? I just told you to sincerely apologize.

[All] Ji9Star: “If Earth Star proves his sincerity and that user accepts it, I will give his position back to him.”

[All] Ji9Star: Didn’t you say that? You never told me to apologize! I even have witnesses!

[All] Captain Poseidon: So where are these witnesses?

As soon as the Captain asked, some guild members, who had so far been quietly watching the scene unfold, stepped forward and claimed to be the witnesses in question.

[All] Halloween Eggplant: Witness 1 here

[All] CroakRush: Witness 2 reporting in!

[All] al0ha: Haha, sure ig. Idr the words tho lmao. But I can be Witness 3

[All] Captain Poseidon: Ah…

[All] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Lmaoo Witness 4 here

[All] CroakRush: And Witness 5!!

Everyone was joking around and laughing it off, but Yeo-woon couldn’t even get the slightest smile onto his lips.

‘I saw you say that ring is worth 4,900won… and you’re wasting it on a prank?’

It seemed like the only people here who didn’t think the situation was funny were Captain Poseidon and Yeo-woon.

While he sat there, unsure what to do and unable to pick between the big Accept or Reject buttons in front of him, there was also a number, steadily counting down with each passing second. The closer it got to zero, the brighter and bigger it seemed. For the last seconds, Yeo-woon stared at it as it reached its end:  3, 2, 1, and…

It was depressing, to see money evaporate into thin air like that. Of course, this wasn’t Yeo-woon’s own money and so he could have just decided this wasn’t his business either… but it was still such a waste… Especially when yet another Relationship request popped up, right after he’d let this second one run out.

Without thinking about what he was doing, Yeo-woon moved his cursor to the Accept button…

As soon as the mouse click registered, both in his mind and the game, a vibrant heart effect filled the whole monitor and light pink flower petals fluttered everywhere. The only other thing visible on screen were the countless speech bubbles, all containing variations of: ‘hahahahahaha’

‘Your relationship has been confirmed! Please check your received skills in the Couple screen! ♡’

‘The [Couple] tab has been added to the chat box. You can now hold secret conversations with your lover!’

[All] Ji9Star: Huh? He really accepted it lmao. I guess he does like me…

[All] neutaaaa: Ew…

[All] Ji9Star: Agreed ><

[All] Halloween Eggplant: This really is the best theatre in town

[All] CroakRush: Ah but this play’s got a sad end, right? They’ll divorce before their honeymoon even starts…

[All] Halloween Eggplant: No spoilers please

And that’s how Yeo-woon found himself with an in-game lover. One he didn’t get along with and had only met the day before.

[All] Ji9Star: Lmaooo Now we can grow closer >_<

[All] neutaaaa: No

[All] Ji9Star: Then why even accept…

‘What a stroke of bad luck…’

Yeo-woon felt really annoyed. He moved his character to hit Earth Star’s with his fists, spamming normal attacks that did nothing.

[All] Ji9Star: This place gives awesome massages~

[All] neutaaaa: ㅡㅡ;

All the users with a Poseidon icon were laughing in chat.

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: I’m sorry, I’m really sorry ㅠㅠ I just wanted you to get a real apology. He will be punished for this, I swear.

Even though Yeo-woon had started resenting Earth Star, he also felt sorry for Poseidon’s Guild Master, who seemed to truly mean what he said.

‘I can’t believe these people have a Guild Master this kind. He’s amazing.’

[Whispering] neutaaaa: It’s okay, I can handle it myself… Thank you for caring enough to offer though

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Nooo ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ Ahh ㅠㅠㅠ I’m sorry ㅜ

[Whispering] neutaaaa: I’m the one who accepted haha.

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: I’m still sorry ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

[Whispering] neutaaaa: No, I should be sorry

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: I’m really sorry though ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

‘No clue who you are, but please don’t waste your tears on that bastard’s actions.’

Yeo-woon felt incredibly sorry for this Guild Master, his heart ached for a person whose face he didn’t even know.

[Couple] Ji9Star: Level 124? Then I’m sure you got the quest to improve your job.

“…!”

‘How did he know?’

Yeo-woon felt goosebumps rise on his skin. He had just received that quest. From Earth Star’s words, it sounded like he could identify a players current quests, just based on a quick glance at their level.

[Couple] Ji9Star: Do you want my help with that?

[Couple] neutaaaa: No

[Couple] Ji9Star: Translation - Yay I’ll get carried

[Couple] neutaaaa: Do we speak the same language? I said I don’t need you

[Couple] Ji9Star: Lmaooooo

[Couple] Ji9Star: Why act like you don’t want it? Wasn’t this your goal all along?

[Couple] neutaaaa: Never

[Couple] Ji9Star: Translation - Oops you caught me

Earth Star made zero sense to Yeo-woon. He didn’t seem apologetic at all. And wouldn’t a person have to be insane, to propose to someone again right away, after they just got rejected by them? After arguing with them in a way that even elementary school kids would be embarrassed by? After going as far as hiring strangers to murder this person in game?

[Couple] neutaaaa: Are you doing this to get revenge?

[Couple] Ji9Star: No? I’m just bored.

[Couple] neutaaaa: Lmao

[Couple] Ji9Star: I can easily level you up, just go afk and eat something or whatever! >_<

[Couple] neutaaaa: I don’t need help.

[Couple] Ji9Star: Until you suddenly change your mind again? I’ll help you get the job change done, just stop tattling on me to our Guild Master.

[Couple] Ji9Star: Sounds like the ideal future, right? All your dreams come true, right? Lol

[Couple] neutaaaa: What?

[Couple] Ji9Star: So we’ll do this on my terms. You don’t talk to other members, stop chewing off the gm’s ears with all your whispers, don’t bother with hellos or byes, and stop acting so friendly. It’s really annoying ㅡㅡ

So all in all, the thing Earth Star wanted was for Yeo-woon to pretend like the entire Poseidon guild and all its members didn’t exist.

“….”

But Yeo-woon saw no reason to let Earth Star have what he wanted. So he pulled up the chat window, scrolled back up to when everyone in Poseidon had been laughing and joking about the proposal and clicked his way through sending friend requests to all of Poseidon’s guild members. With each request, his Friends List grew one username longer….

‘You became friends with Captain Poseidon!’

‘You became friends with al0ha!’

‘You became friends with Kittycat MeowMeowMeow!’

[Friend] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Thank you, Neu-name… You’ve shown me what kinda person I never want to become.

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: Kitty ㅠㅠ Even if it’s just joke, please don’t say such things…

[Friend] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: So I can say them as long as I mean them????

[Friend] Captain Poseidon: No.

[Friend] Kittycat MeowMeowMeow: Oh…

‘You became friends with CroakRush!’

‘You became friends with Impeatuous Peatection!’

‘You became friends with Halloween Eggplant!’

[Friend] Halloween Eggplant: Wow you added even me

Somehow, not a single person had rejected his friend request, even if Yeo-woon struggled to understand why.

‘Is this the true spirit of MMO gamers?’

He didn’t get why people were so happy to accept his friend requests, when he wasn’t even a member of their guild, but it made him curious to learn more about them.

[Couple] Ji9Star: What did you do?

It turned out the other guild members hadn’t tried to keep Yeo-woon’s flood of friend requests a secret from Earth Star. And so of course, if took no time at all until a notification window popped up on his screen…

‘Ji9star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘Am I insane? Go and be friends with yourself.’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

[Couple] Ji9Star: Wow, this is ridiculous ㅡㅡ

[Couple] Ji9Star: Why not accept it?

[Couple] neutaaaa: I don’t want to.

‘Ji9star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

[Couple] Ji9Star: Wow…

[Couple] Ji9Star: Wow… Okay, well I don’t wanna be friends anyway.

‘Ji9star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

[Couple] Ji9Star: …

For the rest of the day, Earth Star stayed in a bad mood, because Yeo-woon refused to be in-game friends, no matter how often Earth Star sent the request. Of course, that just meant he kept trying again, occasionally, throughout the day.

‘Ji9star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

[Couple] Ji9Star: This is so stupid… You accept my dating request, but you don’t wanna be friends.

[Couple] neutaaaa: If that’s illegal, go file a report.

[Couple] Ji9Star: Do you think you’re super special or something?

[Couple] neutaaaa: Go report me^^

[Couple] neutaaaa: Oh, that’s the boss

[Couple] Ji9Star: Idiot, now it’s caught you;;

[Couple] neutaaaa: So… about that help you offered?

‘Ji9star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

[Couple] Ji9Star: You stupid dog. Why won’t you accept me as a friend, even tho I gave you buffs and treats?

[Couple] neutaaaa: Why indeed…

‘So, would you yourself accept a friend that treats you how you treated me, Earth Star?’

There were also plenty signs that Earth Star still hated him. That player was a really strange person…

And so, in just one day, fifteen new people found their way onto Yeo-woon’s Friends List, yet Earth Star was too much to ever fit on there as well.

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - Part 3

Click here for the previous part - or click here for Part 1!

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Now let's get into it:

The next day, when he logged back into the game, Yeo-woon immediately got a notification:

‘You have new mail! Please go to your inbox to check it.’

So he went to the village postman to check it out. He expected it to be a message from the developers, about a current or upcoming event, but instead there were two messages sent by other players. One was from Captain Poseidon and the other was from Earth Star.

‘How strange… Why would Poseidon's Guild Master send me anything?’

So Yeo-woon opened the message from Captain Poseidon first:

[Received mail]

Sender: Captain Poseidon

Title: .

Hello, neutaaaa. I am Poseidon’s Guild Master.

I’m writing this because one of our guild members acted terribly rude yesterday, while I was absent to take care of something. I should been there to stop him, but something had come up and so I had no choice but to leave for a bit. I’m sorry you had suffer through those harsh words, just because I wasn’t there to intervene.

In truth, we’ve had a problem for a while where bad people would join our guild. They did things like openly say they only want to freeload off of us and they kept posting defamatory comments about the whole guild and even its individual members in chats and the community board. There was even a situation where they tracked down the personal social media accounts of a guild member and then spread awful rumors in real life and even made wrongful reports to authorities, just to harass them.

This doesn’t excuse what happened to you, I know, but it’s been stressing out the whole guild and I think this is why Earth Star took your situation so personally.

For now, I have suspended his normal position in the guild. I swore that I’ll give it back once he honestly apologizes to you. I hope being told this makes you feel a bit better again. If he does sincerely apologize for what he did, I would really appreciate you sending me a message or a whisper, just as a confirmation.

‘Wow, the message is long enough to have its own scroll bar.’

After skimming over what the Captain said, Yeo-woon contemplated the situation described in the message.

“…Do people really have nothing better to do than to bother others?

...But how can a game just reveal someone’s personal information to strangers in the first place?”

He had never entered the Illusion community board, unless he needed some info about his own skill tree, so he’d been unaware there was a conflict like that going on. After reading the Guild Master’s message, he felt like the unexpected seriousness of this situation had turned all his opinions on their head. It was a completely different perspective than the dumb, thoughtless words of that guy from yesterday had left him with.

“…A thing like that happened to them.”

‘It’s good that the Guild Master cleared things up. There was a really understandable reason behind those actions.’

He felt like his spiteful little heart had suddenly grown three sizes and lost all its spite in the process. The things Earth Star had done… they were things anyone might do, if someone else happened to strike a nerve like that.

‘If he had told me any of this from the start, I would have apologized right away and left.’

So Yeo-woon clicked on the other mail, this time from Ji9Star, with a gentle smile on his face. But with every line he read, that smile froze more and more, until he was right back to the cold fury he felt before the Captain’s message.

[Received mail]

Sender: Ji9Star

Title: Read this!

I am Earth Star and I want to say sorry. Because I

am not sure I did! But I have thought about it… and I am

not the same I was before. I will bow (--)(__) and say

sorry! I will be a better Earth now! >_o

Attachment: Shiny Apple ×99 Orange Juice ×99

“… What is this, is he an elementary school kid after all?”

‘No, even for an elementary school kid, that text is atrocious.’

Somehow, Yeo-woon just couldn’t shake the feeling that the message was purposefully written in this strange of a way.

‘Why are even the line breaks all over the place? And I could swear he talked like a normal person just yesterday…’

He kept staring at the message for an unhealthy amount of time, trying to decypher it in all kinds of unique ways. Eventually, Yeo-woon thought to only read the first word of every paragraph. That way, he could see what Earth Star really meant with this strange text:

‘I am not sorry.’

“Hah?”

‘And it’s only natural you feel awed by my genius now. I mean, look at what I did!’ Yeo-woon could vividly imagine Earth Star’s little avatar-face saying those words, as it winked at him without any remorse whatsoever.

“What a waste of…”

For the next while, Yeo-woon just sat there, staring blankly ahead. Then, a laugh burst out of him.

‘It’s all so absurd.’

Looking at the facts, there was no reason that guy should pass up a chance to apologize. 

‘He followed me everywhere yesterday and he kept giving me so much shit for ignoring him, so clearly it’s a big deal to get demoted in a guild. So… you’d think he’d sent me an actual apology, exactly as he was told, right?’

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Hello!

Yeo-woon had clicked on Captain Poseidon’s username, to sent him a private whisper, and that’s what he wrote. Conveniently, the Captain was also online right now.

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Ah, hello!

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: You’re the person from yesterday, right?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: I saw your message.

‘I feel like I’m a student, tattling to the teacher, but I have no other choice.’

Talking with the other guy just made Yeo-woon desperate to match all his taunting, careless jabs with ones of his own, but yesterday’s experiences had proven that an approach like that would lead him nowhere.

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Did you get another message besides mine?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Ah, yes…

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Oh, that’s great!

‘Is it, though?’

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Could you please give him a message from me?

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Gladly!

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Please tell him that I received his shiny 99 apple-OJs.

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: What?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: I took them to the closest store and sold them for a whole 1 Bell each. Thanks to this, I now have a tiny bit of extra money for my household’s expenses^^

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: …

‘Yep, you read that right, Captain. But still, I can’t blame you for this.’

After all, looking at the facts, this person, too, was just a victim. He got stuck in the middle of a conflict he didn’t cause and now was tasked with soothing ruffled feathers, while that Earth Star guy just went on doing whatever he felt like.

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Are you saying Earth Star just sent you items…?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: It also took me some time to find his secret message. The one he hid in those randomly placed paragraphs. But now I understand they spell a new sentence, if you only read the first word of each.

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Wow

[Whispering] neutaaaa: ㅠㅠ I guess he must have felt really sorry, because he even sent a whole 99 apologies, disguised as apple-ojs, right?

Captain Poseidon stayed silent for a while after that last sarcastic remark. But then…

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Sorry, but could you please forward that message to me, exactly as it is?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Ofc haha

‘Ah, there’s that beautiful question I was waiting for.’

[Whispering] neutaaaa: I sent you the mail^-^

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Thank you!

[Whispering] neutaaaa: No, no, thank YOU^^

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Sorry for bothering you with this and forcing you to be the middleman.

[Whispering] Captain Poseidon: Oh, no, please, don’t even mention it ㅜㅜ

‘I will entrust this headache to you then, Captain.’

[sic-fayl]

Guild Member Next Door (kinda) translation - part 2

(You can find part 1 here https://www.tumblr.com/sic-fayl/762533305708052480/disclaimer-this-is-part-1-of-a-freestyled if you'd like!)

Disclaimer, as always: This is based on an MTL translation, I do not know Korean myself, I am trying more to stick with the impressions/vibes of a sentence instead of a strict word-for-word meaning - and most importantly, this is only for fun.

Now let's get into it:

It was almost a year ago that his relationship with this ‘Business Partner’ began. It didn’t start out particularly friendly, and even along the way, it sometimes became a bit rocky again. And all of that was putting it nicely.

Yeo-woon had always liked games, ever since elementary school. It started with him secretly taking coins out of the piggy bank in the living room that his family put their change in and going to the local arcade to play. In middle school, he played mobile games that were popular with his friends, and by chance, he started playing online games in high school. After a variety of games, he came across Illusion while he was job hunting. And from that point on, he stayed with that game, all the way until now.

Illusion wasn’t a game with a steady player base for nothing. The guild system was exceptionally good and there were often events. In addition, since it was a game specialized in character customization, there were many people who played the game just for all the different accessories. It was a fun game for users of all ages and even had an active community, with a market and trade system in place.

‘Should I join a guild too?’

One day, that thought suddenly popped into Yeo-woon’s head. In other games, he mainly played by himself, and because of that, he’d rarely joined a proper guild.

Illusion was a game where it was difficult to progress through the story without working your way up one of several different character classes, to reach new and better versions of it that were called character jobs. When he worked hard to level up and was about to do his first job change, he heard that, without a guild, the higher his level, the more difficult it would be to advance further. So to get a hunting buff, he joined a guild that was always recruiting new guild members. But since the guild master did not log in consistently, the guild members left one after another and in the end, it became a ghost guild.

‘If I’m going to do this, should I just create a one-person guild and do it alone?’

He thought about it for a moment, but quickly dismissed the idea. Mainly because the strength of the hunting buff depended on guild level and had a huge range. If you were going to create a one-person guild, the buff would be so small that it would have been better to just play solo and not join a guild at all.

In order to find himself a new guild, Yeo-woon went onto the party matching screen and took a quick look around, to see if there was anyone currently looking for guild members.

Party Matching

[★Full-time part-time job★Star Cradle 5th edition 2.0]

[[For Sale] Please refer to the detailed description of each item!]

[Party for Moon Breaker]

[Unlimited sale of Hammer @@@@ presented by Buybuy Warehouse Cat <<]

1 2 3 4 …9 10 ▷

In the party matching window, there were numerous temporary parties for all kinds of trades and dungeons. While scrolling through Party Matching by pressing the arrows in reverse order starting from page 15, a guild recruitment post caught his eye.

★[[3ch] Looking for new Poseidon guild members]

“Should I try it right now?”

Without thinking, Yeo-woon clicked the ‘Join Party’ button. When the party leader accepted Yeo-woon’s join request, the mini map at the upper left of the screen also gained the party status, showing where each party member was.

This would be the incident that started everything.

There were a total of two party members. They were ‘Captain Poseidon’ and ‘Ji9Star’, a max level Night Spear. Joining the party was easy. Anyone could join by simply clicking on an existing party and then pressing the ‘Join Party’ button.

‘neutaaaa has joined the party.’

[Party] Ji9Star: Hi hi

Ji9Star was the party leader who let him join the party. So Yeo-woon assumed this person was also the guild master and as a result, Yeo-woon tried to turn his social skills up to the max and greeted him.

[Party] neutaaaa: Hello!

[Party] neutaaaa: I’m hoping to join the guild.

Until then, he’d had no interest in guilds or in-game names, so he had no idea what the Poseidon Guild was. This meant that he was completely unaware of the numerous rumors about Poseidon.

Earth Star looked at the party window, figured out where Yeo-woon was, and started moving straight towards him. The other party member, Captain Poseidon, was silent, so he was probably afk.

Through the world’s mini map, Yeo-woon saw a blue dot indicating a party member was fast approaching. He made his own character, who was sitting on the floor, get up and jump in place, prepared to welcome this Earth Star.

However, when Earth Star appeared in front of Yeo-woon, he stood in place and just looked at him for a long time.

‘I said hello earlier, should I say it again?’

But the moment Yeo-woon moved to break the silence, a speech bubble appeared above Earth Star’s head.

[Party] Ji9Star: Why are you so weak…waa

[Party] neutaaaa: ?

[Party] Ji9Star: ᄋᄉᄋ?

[Party] Ji9Star: Did you join without reading the party introduction?

Party introduction? Something like that existed in this game? Yeo-woon went back to the party matching window, found the guild recruitment post, and clicked on it. When he clicked on the title, a join button and an introduction appeared, set up by the user when they had created the post and it seemed to be talking about the guild’s requirements.

The introduction was short and clear:

‘200LV+/Access rate+/With interview/Do daily quests/Must attend ranking match’

‘Actually, I didn’t even know there could be conditions, so I didn’t notice them. Last time, I was just automatically in the guild as soon as I asked to join. Even if everyone has left now and it’s nothing but a ghost guild anymore…’

Among the conditions set forth by the guild, he was able to confirm that he definitely did not meet the required level, though he wasn’t sure what anything else meant… Because Yeo-woon had only just turned level 120.

[Party] neutaaaa: Aaah, I just saw it ㅠㅠ

[Party] Ji9Star: Lol

[Party] neutaaaa: Too bad…ㅜㅜ

[Party] Ji9Star: Yes lol

[Party] neutaaaa: But

[Party] neutaaaa: I think I’ll hit level 200 soon.

[Party] Ji9Star: Lmao?

[Party] neutaaaa: I reached level 50 in just one day, isn’t that cool?

[Party] Ji9Star: ??

[Party] neutaaaa: I stayed up all night for it

[Party] Ji9Star: ?

[Party] neutaaaa: No exceptions to the rules I guess? lmao

[Party] Ji9Star: ????????

It was just a joke. However, Earth Star did not seem to be easy-going enough to handle such a joke. That person didn’t react well at all, so it ended up being a painfully awkward situation. The moment Yeo-woon decided to just see himself out and moved his cursor to the Leave Party button, a speech bubble appeared above Earth Star’s head.

[Party] Ji9Star: Do you have a crush on me?

“…?”

[Party] Ji9Star: LOL

[Party] Ji9Star: Hey

[Party] Ji9Star: Why do you keep following me?

“…Eh?”

‘Who follows who? …I? Him?’

Yeo-woon had nothing to say and just stared at his monitor for a while. Since there was no answer, Earth Star again laughed a LOL.

[Server] Ji9Star: 3ch >neutaaaa< Whoever gets the first kill wins 100 million

“Uh…?”

‘What situation is this?’

The message was different in color from the previous one. Upon closer inspection, it appeared that Earth Star had used a server megaphone. Looking at the server text in front of Earth Star’s message, he realized that the server megaphone had made it so the message was sent to every channel, visible to everyone currently online in the game.

[Whispering] Full Meal AllChicken: ?

[Whispering] BeryStrawberry: Where are you?

[Whispering] Full Meal AllChicken: ?

[Whispering] Atil: What did you do?

[Whispering] Full Meal AllChicken: ?

[Whispering] Full Meal AllChicken: ?

[Whispering] Full Meal AllChicken: ?

People he didn’t know kept sending him whispers. The guild zone he was in was the only place where users could freely hit and kill each other, without having to request a PvP match. Additionally, if someone died in the guild zone, they received a death penalty, unless they owned an item called Token of Resurrection.

Not long after the whispers began, fancy users with sparkles all around their bodies appeared and suddenly beat him up. When Yeo-woon first heard a loud hitting sound, he hurriedly took a potion and tried to run out of the guild zone. He pressed the right keys, but got frozen in place by a user’s skill and so the beating continued.

‘You died. Would you like to resurrect in the closest village?’

Yeo-woon stared at the screen in fascination once he realized that his character’s eyes had turned into Xs and some of his experience points had been removed as a penalty for dying here.

[All] BeryStrawberry: Oops, I killed them^^’

[All] DonnerDono: ?

[All] 101112: Oh, it’s already over

“What, I’m really dead?”

Yeo-woon muttered absently to himself. It all happened so fast, he couldn’t quite process what had even happened to him.

[All] DonnerDono: Berry you dog lmao

[All] DonnerDono: I shaved off all that person’s hp

[All] DonnerDono: You only got the last hit lol

[All] Ji9Star: ᄋᄉᄋ lol

[All] DonnerDono: Yeah, no matter how I look at things, this just ain’t it

[All] DonnerDono: If you have a conscience, reject this money

[All] BeryStrawberry: I’m the one who got the last hit lol doesn’t matter who was here first

[All] DonnerDono: So it’s all good just because you managed to steal my kill?

[All] BeryStrawberry: Yep gg ig you should have worked harder and tried to hit last?

[All] DonnerDono: Hey so

[All] DonnerDono: Let’s just split it 7:3. Me 7 you 3

[All] DonnerDono: Deal?

DonnerDono and BeryStrawberry were making deals about Yeo-woon’s death. Yeo-woon, as the person this was about, chose to stay quiet.

[All] BeryStrawberry: Sounds like a scam lol

[All] BeryStrawberry: If someone reports for bullying only my name is in the log

[All] BeryStrawberry: So I’m the only one eating a ban haha

[All] BeryStrawberry: While you get only positives?

[All] DonnerDono: LOL Are you a fucking clown?

[All] DonnerDono: You don’t get banned for stuff like this, you idiot;

[All] BeryStrawberry: Yeah no listen killing beginners is a warning + sale restriction^^ So there’s punishment and I won’t pay you haha

[All] DonnerDono: Yeah no listen~^^

[All] BeryStrawberry: It’s obvious stuff^^ Or is your brain just noodle soup in disguise?

[All] DonnerDono: Sure, like your face~

[All] BeryStrawberry: Sure.

[All] DonnerDono: Earth Star, who will receive it then? You can decide;;

[All] Ji9Star: Lol you two should figure it out on your own >_<

[All] BeryStrawberry: LOL nice LOL

[All] DonnerDono: Let’s do this, then!

As soon as Earth Star jumped away, getting out of their range, DonnerDono and BeryStrawberry began attacking each other. Brilliant skills and backhanded compliments steadily poured onto the map, and in the middle of it all, Yeo-woon’s character was still lying on the ground as a useless corpse. Surrounded by the flashy fighters, his character looked pitiful, especially with his title of [Just Past The Beginning!] right beside his username.

[All] Green Tea Latte: Oh what; Don’t fight in the center!!!! Now I almost died on the road.

[All] Dadfather: The guild zone really is a fight zone every day. I think there’s more fights here than in the arena lol.

[All] Dark Flame Dragon: A day like any other

“….”

‘I’m the one who died, so why are they angry at each other?’

Yeo-woon could only laugh and watch the two fight.

[All] BeryStrawberry: Lol weak things always talk big

The fight went on for a long time, but in the end BeryStrawberry emerged victorious.

[All] Ji9Star: Please send the kill verification image to earth1010@ssmail.com

[All] BeryStrawberry: Will do~~~

“Really, haa? The guy who killed me is actually getting paid?”

It was so absurd that he just laughed. Yeo-woon had seen people kill each other and die in the guild zone a few times before, but he never would have thought he’d join their ranks one day.

[Party] neutaaaa: Hey…

[Party] neutaaaa: I think there’s some misunderstanding.

[Party] Ji9Star: What misunderstanding?

[Party] neutaaaa: I didn’t follow you…ㅜㅜ

The mob-attack was so unfair. Earth Star was even the first user he’d met today. Did he really think it was right, to suddenly kill someone like this without giving them a chance to clear up potential misunderstandings? But Earth Star just laughed, until an endless string of hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha filled up the entire chatbox.

[Party] Ji9Star: Your character looks like it was made just yesterday

[Party] neutaaaa: I’m level 120?

[Party] Ji9Star: Seems like you did stay up all night lol

[Party] Ji9Star: Hey

[Party] Ji9Star: Aren’t you tired of doing this every time, making all these alts?

[Party] neutaaaa: Alts…? No, I told you…

[Party] Ji9Star: Yeah, but who’s main would look like this lol

“It’s the truth, you stupid bastard.”

Without even realizing it, he started cursing out loud.

‘Whose main… The main I raised with great care and gave cash items to and added good stats to his armor!’

Hearing Earth Star belittle him, calling him a liar, Yeo-woon felt his more murderous side rear its head.

‘I don’t get how you can just say he’s an alt.’

[Party] Ji9Star: LOL

[Party] Ji9Star: Just say you have a crush

[Party] Ji9Star: I will graciously understand and gently let you downㅠㅠ

[Party] neutaaaa: I hate you;

‘Is he crazy? I wouldn’t do that, even if it’d kill me.’

[Party] Ji9Star: Lmaoooooo

[Party] Ji9Star: No other kind of person would be this persistent…

[Party] Ji9Star: Who lives like this?

[Party] Ji9Star: You’re like an obsessed puppy

[Party] Ji9Star: But it’s all good even if you get caught breaking rules because surely you get to join anyway

[Party] Ji9Star: But it's so mean and unfair if you instead get rightfully rejected for it

[Party] Ji9Star: Isn’t that how you feel?

“Oh.”

Yeo-woon felt a little stung by those words. It was true that he’d brought up the suggestion to ignore his low level, just in case. But he could already guess that that wasn’t the true reason behind Earth Star’s actions, so he decided to keep listening for a bit longer.

[Party] Ji9Star: Didn’t even put in the effort to level up…

[Party] Ji9Star: Do you think everything will be fine if you just keep trying with a new alt for long enough?

[Party] Ji9Star: You can’t live like that

[Party] Ji9Star: Your life is so pathetic lol

[Party] Ji9Star: Do you enjoy going on like this, always trying to freeload and getting insulted by someone you don’t really know?

[Party] Ji9Star: If it were me, I would have quit a long time ago lol

“Damn, this assault…”

‘Why are you typing so fast? There’s no chance to jump in.’

As he kept staring at the monitor in surprise for a while, Earth Star wrote another message, saying LOL.

[Party] Ji9Star: Lmaooo why aren’t you saying anything?ㅠㅠ Did you die?

It’s not that he was dead, it was that he couldn’t keep up with the speed of these messages. When he processed the words, he realized that Earth Star seemed to have mistaken him for someone else. Only once he came to this conclusion did Yeo-woon relax again and ask what he was actually most curious about.

[Party] neutaaaa: How fast can you type?

[Party] Ji9Star: Faster than you

[Party] neutaaaa: Ah yes; I’m jealous…

[Party] Ji9Star: thx thx Whenever kids like you pick a fight, words gotta come quick!><

‘I’m not even angry anymore. The guy clearly misunderstood something.’

If someone only listened to parts of it, they wouldn’t notice that, but it seemed like he was only stating what he’d wanted to say for a long time. Yeo-woon calmly took a deep breath and typed.

[Party] neutaaaa: Listen to me

[Party] Ji9Star: I can’t hear you, how can I listen? LOL

[Party] neutaaaa: Look then;

[Party] Ji9Star: Kk~ Go on

[Party] neutaaaa: Today is your first time meeting me.

[Party] Ji9Star: Really lmaoo

[Party] neutaaaa: I was level 120 and I wanted to join a guild, but now I lost experience because of you, who is already max level.

[Party] Ji9Star: Lol it’s like the title of a light novel

[Party] Ji9Star: I guess you read a lot!

[Party] neutaaaa: So, let me say…

[Party] neutaaaa: I don’t know what happened to Earth Star so far, but

[Party] neutaaaa: Aren’t you saying too many rude things to an innocent user and without any evidence for your assumptions? :)

In fact, he wanted to say two very contradictory things, but when coming out of the same mouth, they couldn’t both work. He couldn’t be two people at once, so he chose to respond as calmly as he could. He even put a friendly smiling face at the end, so the other person could relax again too.

[Party] Ji9Star: I give you a pick-me score of A ^^

[Party] Ji9Star: But an acting score of F

[Party] Ji9Star: So total score is F

Fuck being calm. His typing speed increased. As it were, the most recent village he’d get resurrected in was still within the guild zone, so trying to escape was pointless. That village was right next to them.

‘If I had known this would happen, I would have bought some warp capsules.’

[Party] Ji9Star: I see you’re lost for words again lol

[Party] Ji9Star: Did you really think I wouldn’t confront you like this? I guess you did

[Party] Ji9Star: I guess it’s okay for a bastard like you to say something to me, but

[Party] Ji9Star: If a ranker says one wrong word to a small player, he or she becomes the villainㅜㅜ

[Party] Ji9Star: Hmm, but I’m not the GM, so I’m allowed to be rude sometimes ㅠᄉㅠ So why are you saying this to me…

[Party] neutaaaa: But you’re the one saying things right now, not me?

[Party] Ji9Star: Didn’t ask

[Party] neutaaaa: Ugh

[Party] Ji9Star: Now, what next?

He didn’t understand him at all. Was this what it felt like to argue with an opinionated pre-schooler?

[Party] neutaaaa: I’ll just leave…

[Party] Ji9Star: Let me know what time you will upload your new work today~

‘What new work is he talking about??’

Yeo-woon didn’t have the faintest clue what he meant.

“What the hell did I say that was so bad?”

He grumbled in anger.

‘Bad life, obsessions, freeloading, I don’t know anything about that. My only crime is trying to join a guild. That’s the truth…’

[Party] neutaaaa: fvhfv wndrjVmsGbesa

[Party] neutaaaa: rngt

Why was his keyboard suddenly writing in completely different letters? Yeo-woon pressed the Language Switch key and the Enter key with his little finger, to return his keyboard to normal. He was planning to retype what he just said, but Earth Star struck first.

[Party] Ji9Star: Translation plz :(

[Party] neutaaaa: I really didn’t see the party introduction.

[Party] Ji9Star: Thx :)

[Party] neutaaaa: Hah…

‘If you’d swear some more, I could at least report you as a user with bad manners.’

There was no way to report him for being sarcastic and faking obliviousness.

[Party] neutaaaa: I’m a newbie so I don’t know much about the guild system.

[Party] neutaaaa: Really.

[Party] Ji9Star: I don’t know because I’m a newbie ㅠㅠ <<Translation - Everything is explained on one convenient game screen, so I knew all along

[Party] neutaaaa: No?

[Party] Ji9Star: Translation - Oops got caught in the act

“….”

[Party] Ji9Star: Lmao hit the mark, right?

[Party] Ji9Star: I saw right through it, didn’t I?

[Party] Ji9Star: Not funny anymore, is it?

‘I should’ve just played solo. Or joined another beginners’ guild! This was such a waste of time and all I got was my experience points reduced and then I had to listen to pointless insults just because I stumbled on some crazy person.’

[Party] neutaaaa: I’m really leaving… I was hoping to clear up the misunderstanding, but you clearly don’t care.

[Party] neutaaaa: Bye…

[Party] Ji9Star: Lol let’s run away because we got caught, right?

[Party] neutaaaa: No

[Party] Ji9Star: Translation - Yes

Yeo-woon decided to muster up a thousand years of patience and forgive the guy just this once. Just to not have to deal with this any longer.

‘Hope you bite your tongue while eating. Miss the bus and have to run and drop your phone. When going out, get pigeon shit dropped right on your head. Ah, I guess I should just act like I stepped on shit myself and leave the party…’

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Ah, Earth Star!

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Did you hit your head?? What happened while I was gone…;;;

[Party] Captain Poseidon: Neu-nam,e wiat a min!!

The person who had been afk all this time had finally returned. Yeo-woon knew that the Captain still had more to say, but he didn’t want to be in this party for another second. So he gave his screen the middle finger and left them by themselves.

‘neutaaaa has left the party.’

And as soon as he revived in the nearby village, he ran blindly in a random direction. But soon after, Earth Star found him. He caught up with Yeo-woon’s character, who had run to the other side of the entire village.

‘Why’s he so fast?’

His speed was so unbelievable that his jaw dropped. It only took that one moment of distraction for Earth Star to cross the remaining distance, as if he had some longer, better version of the dash skill.

‘Zero wave!’

Earth Star beat Yeo-woon’s character to death with a one-shot skill. There was a sound like something breaking and then his character’s back was bent clean in half. A sign appeared above him, showing it had been a critical hit, and then he died again and his experience points fell once more.

‘You died. Would you like to resurrect in the closest village?’

[All] neutaaaa: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Oh no, what a mistake

‘A mistake? Using a skill to beat someone to death? No way.’

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Guess you should have stopped when I called you lmaoo

[Whispering] neutaaaa: You didn’t call for me?;;

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Didn’t I?>_<

‘You didn’t, you fucking bastard.’

Yeo-woon pressed the revive button, respawning in the village again. And then he took off in a new direction, but something that looked like a fly from afar dashed up from behind him, fast as a rocket and landed in front of him. Yeo-woon was shocked.

‘You were at the other end of the whole village, but you still caught up with my character so quickly?’

This should have been impossible, unless he had some insane speed buff. Something strange was going on with this character.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Let me clear up the misunderstanding rq!

[Whispering] neutaaaa: ??

Yeo-woon stopped for a moment and wrote a question mark in the chat window.

‘What misunderstanding? There’s no way there’s another misunderstanding between him and I.’

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Because of you, the GM lowered my position in the guild ㅠ Feel sorry for me

Then Earth Star used an emote to make his character hit the ground and cry. To Yeo-woon’s surprise, a faint smile slowly spread across his own lips.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Good good ^^

[Whispering] Ji9Star: ?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Nice ^^

‘No clue what it means, but that’s really good.’

Seeing as that change made him so annoyed that he even followed Yeo-woon all the way here.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: It’s awful

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Great ^^

‘I’ve never before in my life argued with someone like pre-schoolers.’

But since the person he was dealing with was just like a pre-schooler, he’d started talking this way without even realizing at first. And wasn’t there some fitting sayings for this situation anyway, like ‘an eye for an eye’?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Stop using those happy emotes - I feel weird. TIA

[Whispering] Ji9Star: GM keeps calling me trash. What will you do about this?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Trash << Agree :)

It seemed the person who was afk earlier was the actual guild master. But then why did this guy, who wasn’t even the GM, get so irritated so quick by Yeo-woon having missed their rules?

‘…Anyways, that’s none of my business.’

Feeling relieved, he started running towards the right edge of the guild zone map again.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Hey

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Trash Punch><

However, Earth Star seemed to not want to let things go, as he kept following his character and even circling him with his speed, as well as pummeling his character with normal attack skills. But even more frustratingly, maybe thanks to Earth Star being max level, Yeo-woon couldn’t even handle five of his hits before his health droped into the red. So he had to constantly use precious health potions like they were his last water in a desert.

When he finally managed to get out of the guild zone, he also left his gnawing fear of suffering a second player-kill behind.

‘I don’t plan on setting foot near the guild zone again any time soon. Maybe I should just go to a whole different channel…’

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Where are you going?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Hey

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Where are you going?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Hey, where are you going instead of just talking?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: You

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Hey

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Just admit that you like me so much that you even made this alt

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Hey you

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Can you not see my messages…

“How is he typing so fast…”

The speed of those messages was like speaking in person. It was almost at lightspeed and it was impossible to understand how it could be done, unless everything was written in advance and then copy-pasted.

‘Ji9Star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

Then, a large Friend Request window appeared on the screen. A max-level nightspear jumped around in the background, causing an afterimage effect. It felt like the character was urging him to accept the friend request already. Of course Yeo-woon refused.

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

‘Ji9Star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

‘Ji9Star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

He couldn’t go anywhere, thanks to the constant friend requests that kept popping up. The persistent chat messages and friend requests kept covering up his screen. Sometimes, 1v1 PvP Request windows and Party Invitation windows would also pop up. After rejecting all incoming messages for twenty times in a row, Earth Star stopped zipping all over the place and came to a halt in front of Yeo-woon’s character.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: I’m right here;

‘Why are you so invested in this?’

He couldn’t figure out his intentions. He’d only wanted to leave the party and the whole situation behind himself gracefully. Why would Earth Star expect anything more from him?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Are you a child?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: I already have lots of friends, so I won’t be friends with you.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: This is so dumb. Are you really bragging about the number of friends you have right now?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: If we’re looking at things from that kinda view, I have way more friends than you.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Ah sure…

[Whispering] Ji9Star: I just needed to put something big on your screen to stop you from running, since you’re ignoring me and keep running off ㅠ

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Ah… I see.

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Sorry, I have nothing more to say.ㅜㅜ

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Stop following me.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: I won’t follow you anymore, if you just please whisper to the GM and tell him that I have made up with you!

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Just say I apologized!><

“What…”

‘If you don’t apologize, where’s the point in me saying that you did?’

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Are you an actual child?ㅠ

[Whispering] Ji9Star: No… But for a while now, I’ve secretly tried to myself this was all just a weird nightmare…

[Whispering] neutaaaa: But you can’t do it secretly and also expect it to be openly known.ㅠㅠ

[Whispering] Ji9Star: …?

The best way to respond to a sarcastic person was to make them swallow their own medicine. Well, the actual best way was to not interact with them at all, but even when Yeo-woon switched to a different channel on the server, Earth Star could just tell somehow and kept hunting him down, until he found him again.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: But I really don’t understand

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Why on earth are you doing this to me?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Do you know me?

[Whispering] neutaaaa: That’s what I was going to ask

[Whispering] Ji9Star: I’m the one always meeting weird people like this, and yet this pick-me here is really…

[Whispering] neutaaaa: Haa? Maybe you don’t know what pick-me means…

[Whispering] Ji9Star: I know;

[Whispering] neutaaaa: So what’s it mean?

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Roleplaying a total victim. Like you’re doing now;;

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Ah really, what should I do about my position ㅠ Give it back already!!ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

[Whispering] neutaaaa: That’s not my responsibility.

‘Ji9Star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

It became difficult for Yeo-woon to play the game smoothly, thanks to all the annoying windows popping up all the time. And then Earth Star even followed him into the field and kept him from hunting any monsters.

[Whispering] Ji9Star: Trash Punch!

Since his high-level skills immediately wiped out the monsters on the map, there were none left for Yeo-woon’s own quest to kill monsters. He just wanted to hit this Earth Star, who was still zipping all over the screen. He wanted to stop him and beat him up, but this wasn’t the guild zone, so they couldn’t hit each other at all. And he wasn’t a max level player like him, so even if they could have, Yeo-woon would have only died again.

‘Can’t I block him or something?’

Even while he searched through the settings window and all its options, the friend requests continued taking up his screen.

‘Ji9Star sent a friend request. Do you want to accept?’

‘You have rejected the friend request.’

‘Ah, this is so annoying. I really don’t want to play anymore for today, with all this bs he's pulling...’

Yeo-woon took off his headphones and then just pressed the power button, completely shutting off his computer for the day.

(Next Part)

[sic-fayl]

Alex without Ryan (aka, Sometimes you will not survive on your own)

Description: So… this might feel a bit random by itself. That’s because it’s one of two stories that are kinda inspired by a specific song lyric: Am schönsten ist die Chance, die du verpasst (translated: the most beautiful chance is the one you miss out on).

Originally, the song that line is from (which you can find here https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=me5M_NbovCo and its lyrics here https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nl6Ga8XxDHeIW91F29CXEpCF97vOv2Cc29m-Pm_Km9Q/edit?usp=drivesdk btw) spawned a longer story, where both of the guys survive, thanks to intervening in each other’s suicide.

But in real life, sometimes there is no intervention and sometimes we don't get to finish what we started. Sometimes there's no time left and eventually, death comes for everyone. So I hope you'll enjoy this story anyway.

(Obviously tw for suicide/character death, since this is the version where they don’t save each other.)

Now, onto the story:

The sun is slowly disappearing behind the horizon, only the dark clouds of a brewing storm left in its wake. Down below, people are making their way home, everyone tired and exhausted and done with everything.

Maybe there's something beautiful in all of that, but Alex has long given up on those kinds of ideas.

After all, they're as pointless as he is.

And it's today, so why entertain pointless things anymore?

They're about to be over. Same as him.

See, today is Alex' birthday. No one called or texted him about it - and that was partially his own fault, for telling no one about it. But, well... he knew this was going to happen, so excuse him for trying to be courteous and not involving new people in this mess he calls his life.

It's not why he's up here anyway. That's simpler, even though it's a longer explanation:

When he was a kid, with classmates who laughed at him and pulled pranks on him - and parents who argued -both around and with him- and delighted in seeing him suffer... Well, when he was a kid like that, he had so much indignation burning him up from the inside out.

"I'll show 'em," he'd thought. "Someday I'll be so incredibly successful - and they'll be nothing and regret they ever did this. No, not 'someday' - I'll have all of that by the time I'm 25!"

Today, he's officially 25.

He's got nothing.

Not even a finished apprenticeship... He's been endlessly moving between different things - giving up completely in the last year or so, because nothing feels like it actually fits him. He can't remember the last day he actually felt excited about something, instead of just endlessly exhausted. He also can't remember the last day he actually believed those words he spouted as a kid.

He left his family behind - though in all fairness, they were a bunch of dickbags anyway. It's no less than they deserved and probably better for his own peace of mind anyway. The thing is just that he's got no friends either. Grew apart from most, fell out with the rest, once they started acting way different from how they used to be. "That's just life," many online articles have told him - but it doesn't make him feel any less like the lonely, friendsless loser that he is.

And of course his last temporary job didn't work out either. He's glad it's over, actually. Though, in the long term that's just another whole category of jobs to cross off his list, because apparently this one, too, was the kind that brought him to his breaking point.

Then again, maybe it's a problem with him, not with the jobs. Maybe he's just... broken somehow. Maybe there's no job that fits him at all. In truth, he's stopped hoping by now.

Maybe that's good timing anyway. And maybe that's exactly why he went for a job that'd end right before his birthday: Because he knew it wouldn't work out.

Some small part of him wonders when he stopped expecting things to work out in the end. When he might've turned into such a pessimist. It must've snuck up on him, because he can't figure it out.

By now, it's harder to believe he ever had those high expectations to begin with...

But either way, this is it: His deadline is reaching its end. Nothing more to be done in the few hours the day has left.

It's over.

And there's a freedom in that, isn't there? When his life's been a painful rat race all along and now... Well, now it won't be able to anymore. It's his own choice and at least that part feels nice. That this is something he knows he can do right for once. After all, nothing much to fuck up, about falling from a high-rise's rooftop.

So, that's cool. Makes him want to laugh -or maybe cry- that the one thing he feels proud of is the certainty that he'll get his own death right. But... at least he has that much, right?

So, then... as long as he does this... he's at least not a total loser.

It's simple as that: A childhood vow and a last comfort towards himself. That's all this is. That's all he can be, as it turns out.

And so here he is, gripping a rusted metal railing and feeling his own body shake apart with every breath he takes, as he tries to convince himself to let go.

He's not sure why he hasn't yet - well, okay, that's a lie: It's pure survival instinct that's to blame. But it's not like it's forcing him to stand here like an idiot, when he could just let go.

He's ready, is the thing. Not completely, sure, but as ready as he'll ever be. So it's nearly funny, how hard his hands keep gripping that stupid rail in spite of himself. It's to a point where he can't feel his fingers anymore, that's how tight his hold is.

And it should be easy, really. Just... unclenching his hands - spreading his fingers. And then gravity will take over and do the rest. Simple, right?

His hands think otherwise. They're like claws... He heard somewhere that eagles can't unclench their claws from prey, even if it drags them into death. That sometimes, fishermen in the mountains will catch big fish with an eagle's feet still hooked into them - no trace of the rest of the eagle left, only its claws to show how it must've drowned in the river's currents.

He feels like one of those eagles - equally shackled to something he desperately wants to let go of.

Maybe he'll even look the same as them, once his body hits the pavement. Weirdly enough, that's the thought that makes him smile, helps him relax, and so he decides to focus on that: On his future, on his body, on how nothing will be left behind of him.

Alex will be gone.

He'll be free.

It's getting easier, he can feel it. And then he feels something else: A drop of water hits his hand. Then his face - his arm, one of his fingers and even his nose.

The storm is here. Thankfully, no wind so far, only rain - no doubt he'd go right back to clinging onto the rail, if there was wind trying to throw him back and forth. So it's really good that it's only rain for now. Feels like the universe trying to make this easy on him. He's not sure he appreciates it, but he'll take it anyway.

For now, he's content to watch some drops fly by. To see them race away towards the ground. He gets lost in the pattern, focusing in on individual ones until they each disappear from his sight and he finds a new one to follow. Feeling barely present in himself, he wonders where they end up, how their journey keeps on going in that last stretch down below before they splash.

He knows he's leaning forward a bit, as if that'll already let him follow them the whole way down - and it's in that moment that his relaxed hold slips.

It's stupid, really. He was so focused on the drops that he completely forgot where he was - so, when one of his hands slipped free, his other hand just... let go too, as he twisted his body towards the place that first hand had been holding.

The instinctual plan had been to push it back against the rail with his body and his other hand.

So, he'd instinctually taken a half-step back, to try and put more force behind his push.

He'd stepped back into nothingness.

And somehow, his grasping, frantic hands missed the rail entirely - more just flailing vaguely forwards at another, new nothingness.

Now he's in freefall. Backwards. Downwards.

Maybe he's crying. Out of fear, or frustration, or grief, or joy.

He doesn't know.

He knows he's grinning - grimacing, really, because it's just so typical:

He'd just wanted to see where the drops go. Watch them all the way 'til the end.

So, of course he fell in the one way that won't even let him see them a-

[sic-fayl]

Disclaimer:

THIS IS PART 1 OF A FREESTYLED TRANSLATION BASED ON AN MTL OF THE NOVEL - I DO NOT KNOW KOREAN (tho I did read the available translations of both the manhwa and novel) AND I'M NOT TRYING TO BE ACCURATE TO THE EXACT ORIGINAL SENTENCES/MEANINGS, BUT MORE JUST THE OVERALL ATMOSPHERE OF EVERYTHING (so maybe it's more accurate to call this a very much inofficial localisation??)

MOST IMPORTANTLY, I'M DOING THIS BECAUSE IT'S FUN - now, onto the text:

#01. Ji9Star

'Please someone come save us - if we have to keep going like this, we’ll die.'

Even the fan whined as it kept on spinning, blowing ever more hot air his way. A closed office like this, without air conditioning in the middle of summer... This had to be employee abuse. Yeo-woon sighed and opened the messenger program at the bottom right of his screen.

‘Fake friends (Ad) On a hot day like today, this can cool my heart….’

Everything really had perfectly aligned to make people feel as miserable as possible. Why was it that the only ones who reliably contacted him first were sponsored ads? Maybe it was time to get some better friends… But instead, he opened their group chat and sent a message to express his boredom.

- Did you guys get lunch?

Seon-yong: no. I want pizza

Jeong Se-hyung: Fuck everything. I swallowed so much hate today, I won’t need anything for the rest of the week.

Jeong Se-hyung: Manager, how can you expect all this shit to get done in just one day?? Could YOU actually do that???

Jeong Se-hyung: Guess when you next drag us out drinking, I’ll just pretend like I don’t know my actions have consequences either and punch you in the face to make you pay for it all.

Seon-yong: lol

Seon-yong: you’re still better than lee yeo-woon. I saw that guy put away money in a savings account

Seon-yong: for a hitman

Jeong Se-hyung: ? Lmao got barely enough cash for an emergency fund, but still pretends he can pay for luxuries like that.

- And now I’m going to make another one just for you ^^

Jeong Se-hyung: Waa

Seon-yong: do it

And so he realized once more that it was work time. Those who would drop off the face of the earth after six in the evening read and answered messages faster than anyone else at this hour.

Jeong Se-hyung: So where should I download my resignation letter from?

Seon-yong: wait but you just bought a car haha

Seon-yong: you got a lot of money lying around?

Jeong Se-hyung: Oh, thank you. Your compassionate words have calmed my rage…

‘I’m bored.’

There was another chat that caught Yeo-woon’s eye while he was aimlessly spinning the mouse wheel with his finger. The saved name for that person was ‘Business Partner’.

‘I’m bored. Maybe I can message him first, for a change? It’s been a while since I did that.’

Yeo-woon double-clicked the chat to open it and put his hands to the keyboard.

- Are you still sleeping?

He pressed Enter to send the question, but then the ‘1’ next to the message refused disappear, indicating it wasn’t being read. This ‘Business Partner’, whenever he was up, was someone who gave answers faster than a speeding bullet. Yeo-woon, who had been waiting for a reply for a while now, guessed that he must still be asleep.

- They didn’t fix the aircon today either.

- Remember today’s the deadline?

- I won the bet hah.

He was laughing in the text, but in reality he couldn’t even smile thanks to the overwhelming heat.

‘Boss, is it really such a waste to you, to fix the air conditioning? Then surely living is a waste to you as well…’

Yeo-woon picked up his charging cell phone and opened its banking app. After depositing another 30,000 won into the ‘hitman savings account’, he stared for a while at what he managed to save up so far. Then he put his phone down again.

“I’m having trouble saving any money…”

He took a deep breath and glanced at the clock on the computer screen. It was just past one o’clock. What a time for that person to still be asleep… It was such an enviable life. Yeo-woon leaned back in his chair and drooped like a sloth.

“…hot.”

‘I’m hot, sleepy, hungry and tired. If this isn’t a beggar’s life, what is? I really want to go home. I want to quit my job.’

He wanted to go home and play games to his heart’s content and whenever he’d get sleepy, get to lie down and sleep right away.

“Assistant Lee.”

“Ah!”

At the sound of a voice behind him, Yeo-woon hurried to mash the Esc key, until the chat window disappeared. When he stiffly turned his head, he saw Assistant Manager Kim, a grin on his face and wiping sweat off his forehead with the back of one hand.

“Sir?”

“What’s up? Were you doing something?”

“Oh, no. I just didn’t expect…”

“What, were you surprised?”

“…Ah, right. Just surprised.”

Yeo-woon smiled calmly and swiveled his chair around. Surely, the contents of that one group chat remained unseen... If his plan to kill the boss was discovered, Yeo-woon’s hard-earned image of a healthy, polite, and upright elite would go up in flames.

“Here’s Assistant Lee’s coffee.”

‘…Oh, maybe he really didn’t see it?’

“Haha, thank you…”

Yeo-woon smiled awkwardly and accepted the coffee he was offered with both hands. When Assistant Manager Kim handed it over, he could tell there was ice rattling inside the disposable cup. Some water droplets that had formed on the surface of the cup ran downwards, making his palms wet in the process.

“You skipped lunch, didn’t you? Are you okay?”

“I feel a little bloated today. When that happens, I just throw up whatever I try to eat.”

“Oh my, what can be done about such a sickly disposition in a guy?”

“Haha, I’ve just always been a bit weaker in the summer.”

‘So fix the aircon, for fuck’s…’ Yeo-woon internally grumbled.

“When I’m not feeling well, for me, hm… Is it okay for you to drink coffee on an empty stomach?”

“Yes, it’s okay.”

“But you usually don’t eat breakfast either. It’s never good to put caffeine into an empty stomach.”

“Thank you for your concern.”

“Well, I can’t let my subordinates come to harm.”

‘Pretty sure I’d sooner pass out from heat stroke than get sick from some coffee…’

“Don’t worry, I got a death insurance.”

“Oh, does it work well?”

“Well, I haven’t died yet…”

“That’s true. Then tell me your verdict later.”

Assistant Manager Kim was laughing as he flapped his shirt, while Yeo-woon just wondered what was so funny to him. Judging by the bright red face, he seemed just as affected by the relentless heat. Why did their air conditioning have to break during such a hot summer? It felt like they were being steamed alive in a boiling pot…

“So what do you do after work these days?”

“Me? I exercise.”

“Exercise…? Oh, are you still going swimming?”

“Yes.”

“Ah…. Every day?”

“Yes.”

At Yeo-woon’s answer, he narrowed his eyes and muttered, “Now, that’s not right, is it?”

‘…Are you supernatural, to always know these things?’

Well, he really did exercise, but he couldn’t do it every day. The life of an office worker was just like that.

“The swimming pool is closed on Mondays….”

“….”

“And I was too exhausted the day before yesterday so I couldn’t go.”

“….”

“And I sometimes take weekends off.”

“…Hmm.”

“Uh, and something also came up yesterday…”

In the end, the truth was that he hadn’t gone more than once or maybe twice this week.

“Assistant Lee.”

“….”

“I know everything.”

Hearing those words, he felt a bit wronged. Originally, it wasn’t this bad. He used to exercise pretty diligently, but this week had been a total disaster…

“But I’m really going today. I even brought my swimsuit.”

“No… I’m not talking about that.”

“Ah?”

He grinned in a sinister way at Yeo-woon, as he said things that made no sense. That face, that seemed to know everything, only made him feel even more uncomfortable.

“Assistant Lee! Didn’t you get a lover?”

“…Ah?”

Yeo-woon’s eyes went blank. He had no idea how to react to Assistant Manager Kim’s words. What kind of lover would have suddenly appeared to him…? He didn’t even have the spare time for something like that.

“I can see it so clearly. Nowadays, whenever Assistant Lee is done with work, he quickly packs his bags and leaves right away.”

“…”

“I know what I’ve seen. So you really have a lover, huh?”

“No, it’s not…”

Yeo-woon closed his eyes with a troubled look on his face. He really didn’t have a lover, but he was a bit reluctant to tell the truth as well.

His image at the company was that of a flawless and healthy young man. So to admit that he played video games to a degree that could be called an addiction was a bit… Already, even if he only said that he played games in his free time as a hobby, he was often looked at like he was pathetic.

Yeo-woon’s hobby was playing online MMORPG games. The game he played, ‘Illusion’, had been in the Summer Festival event for two weeks now, and you had to log in for at least three hours a day to receive the rewards.

In addition, in order to do guild quests for limited items, he had to rush out as soon as his work shift ended for the day. Right now, it was also vacation season for all students, so if you didn’t do this, you were likely to fall far behind in the event’s rankings. And even though he wasn’t that interested in the rankings, there was one item he really wanted to have among the ones from this event, so he had no choice.

“...like that?”

“You mean there isn’t one? You don’t have a lover?”

“Yes, there is none.”

“No way…”

“Really…”

“Oh, wait, I know! So it’s just casual?”

He snapped his fingers and had a faint smile on his face. Yeo-woon tried hard to suppress the frown that wanted to overtake his own face. It’s relationships and more relationships with this guy. Why was he so interested in other people’s dating situation?

“If you want to marry your secret lover, you need to save up a lot of money. Right?”

“Haha…”

‘I shouldn’t become a boss like that in the future. I need to resign before something like that can happen.’

Even though Yeo-woon was inwardly scolding him, he showed off his inherent social skills by smiling shyly and shaking his head.

Ding!

“….”

“….”

The assistant manager’s interrogation was interrupted by a sound that came from the monitor. Both of their eyes got stuck on what had popped up on it.

Business Partner: Hey ><

“What business?”

Assistant Manager Kim asked in a puzzled voice. Yeo-woon’s blood froze at the unexpected situation. He usually had the sound turned off, but it seemed like it was turned on now because he played around with some settings earlier and forgot to turn them back.

Business Partner: Awake now

He couldn’t make any excuses and realized the situation right away, freezing, as Assistant Manager Kim smiled slyly and tapped him on the shoulder.

“Is that your girlfriend?”

“…no.”

“The emoticon is so cute. Is she young?”

“That’s not…”

“Is she a college student?”

“No, that…”

Ding!

Business Partner: Hehe I woke up a little late today because classes got canceled

“She’s totally a college student.”

Stop, stop…

Ding!

Business Partner: The aircon’s still not fixed? I feel sorry for you, honey

Please, stop…

Business Partner: The aircon works perfect at my place tho. Do you want to come over?

“That’s your girlfriend.”

“It’s not…”

“It is.”

“It’s not.”

“But why is the name saved as Business Partner?”

“…”

“Look, I don’t mind this! Are you trying to sneakily talk at work?”

“That…”

“Wow, Assistant Lee has become brave, huh? It’s a common problem with kids these days. They all use tricks like these. Interesting though, right? Wouldn’t you agree, Assistant Lee?”

“…”

“Huh? I’m not scolding you for this. Why is your face so pale?”

‘Fuck. Rumors will spread.’

Cold sweat was running down his back. Yeo-woon shook his head vigorously and made one last ditch effort to get the truth out.

“Sir, please! This really isn’t my girlfriend. It’s just a friend!”

“Funny. Does your friend always call you ‘honey’?”

“It’s a friend who calls me that as a joke… Yes.”

‘I’m ruined.’

He wasn’t listening anymore.

‘I wouldn’t even believe that myself.’

There are usually no friends like that. Not without some feelings between them anyway. His lips became dry. Assistant Manager Kim hummed a song that started with “Hello” and took out a toothbrush from a drawer. Yeo-woon kept muttering that it wasn’t true a few more times, talking to the back of his head, but he went ignored.

‘Wouldn’t it be unfair, to blame this all on my nonexistent girlfriend…’

So the arrow of resentment was aimed at someone else instead. Yeo-woon opened the chat window with his ‘Business Partner’ and started typing angrily.

- Now you’re awake, why don’t you also go eat something?

The 1 next to the speech bubble quickly disappeared. So he was watching the chat in real time.

Business Partner: I ordered rice

- Hope you choke

Business Partner: Lmaooooo Is it so hot there it’s like a sauna?

- Hope you choke

Business Partner: Poor you lol

Business Partner: Then come visit my place

Business Partner: My room right now is like Antarctica. It’s so cold

“Why is he asking me to come over to his house every chance he gets these days…?”

It’s too persistent to just dismiss it as a joke anymore. No matter what he’d say, all he got in response was offers to meet up. But he was reluctant because he’d never before met with anyone he got to know in a game, and he felt no real motivation to change that in the future. It would be better for both parties to keep an online relationship exactly where they’d first met: online.

‘I watched I Want to Know last week, and worst case, you might lose your organs and even your vision…’

He’d initially been on the fence about it. But after watching that broadcast, he’d decided against it. Offline group meet-ups shouldn’t be attended, unless you wanted to die.

- Quit joking

Business Partner: Joking? I’m serious lol

Business Partner: You said you’re curious about my place

- Not your place, your cat

- Can’t you at least show me a picture?

- (emoticon)

Yeo-woon sent a peach emoticon with sparkling eyes and confetti falling down. The earnest look on its face made him feel weak, so hopefully his ‘Business Partner’ would feel the same and send a picture of the cat.

Business Partner: Why do you want a picture of my baby? You can take a look in person

- You… ㅡ.ㅡ

‘One more failure to add to the collection.’

It had already been 6 months of him begging for a picture of this cat, ever since he heard a soft meowing in the back of a voice call. He kept hearing it, but still didn’t know its name, or even fur color, or why he wouldn’t just tell him these things.

As he thought about this, he relaxed in the chair. When it suddenly got spun around, he saw Assistant Manager Kim, who had been talking to him earlier and now muttered incorrect lyrics with a toothbrush in his mouth and a rotten expression on his face.

“I’m jealous. Work is over. They all just go home?”

“….”

“And then off to get some action.”

“No!”

“It’s a shame. I have to stay late again today, King of late work right here, Assistant Lee.”

“It’s not like that…”

“Huh? Are you staying late as well for today?”

“…No, I’m going, but… Just listen to what I have to say. Please.”

“Hah. I’m off to brush my teeth, then. Love is such a pure affair!”

He smiled softly, picked up his toothbrushing cup, and walked off. After all, Yeo-woon was known for being the most agreeable person in the office.

Thoughts of pure destruction filled his head.

- Stop texting;

Business Partner: lol? You texted first…

- Then don’t call me honey.

Business Partner: We both know it’s not like that lol. Unless…?

- No butㅠㅠ; Other people mistake you for my lover… I almost got scolded just now.

Business Partner: What lmao then change the screen name

- Already changed.

Business Partner: What is it?

- Business Partner

Business Partner: Huh?

- What?

Business Partner: ?? lmao

Business Partner: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

“…?”

What was so funny about it? Wasn’t it fine? Yeo-woon frowned as he looked at the chat window filled with long strings of hahaha that just kept on coming.

- Why are you laughing?

Business Partner: Ah, he doesn’t even let me laugh

- Is this funny to you?^^

Business Partner: Yes pfffff, thinking about you getting caught like that makes my stomach hurt

- Take medicine^^

Business Partner: It’s not that kind

- I know^^;

Business Partner: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA business partnerㅠ

“….”

‘What’s wrong with Business Partner? Then what should I change it to? I can’t save it as my mother….’

Yeo-woon stared at the monitor with a sullen expression and let out a small sigh.

‘I guess I’ll have to change the name again. But what would be better?’

Business Partner: But we’re lovers

- Uh…

- F off

Business Partner: ㅠㅠ I’m wounded… Honey, is our relationship just a joke to you? Let’s break up

- Go choke some more

Business Partner: ᄃᄃ Am I embarrassing you?

- Yes

Business Partner: ㅠㅠ Am I annoying you?

- Oh yes

Business Partner: lol

Business Partner: But you still like me

“….”

Business Partner: Ah you got caught so now you’re quiet >ᄉ<

“On what basis are you saying this?”

Shocked. That’s how he felt every time, because he was dealing with a guy who loved himself way too much. Or maybe a guy hoping to drive him crazy, with how much he enjoyed making fun of him.

“It’s really not that at all though?”

Yeo-woon repeatedly scrolled up and back down again as he tapped his foot. Every day their conversations went like this. Why was he always like this? Was this normal? Were other gaming couples like this too?

‘I don’t know why we’re talking like this when we’re not really dating. But saying these things would just make it worse…’

- You’re so fucking annoying lol. You’re the most fucking annoying man in the world.

Business Partner: Translation – I really fucking like you, but I got caught and that’s annoying.

- lol

Business Partner: Ugh… Now I have to laugh because I got caught again.

- ㅠㅠ

Business Partner: Ugh… Now I have to cry because I got caught again.

It was a situation much like getting stuck between a rock and a hard place. Normally, he would just go silent at this point, but today he felt incredibly bored, so he’d keep it going for just a bit longer. As he was killing time with this meaningless banter, the office door suddenly opened and he heard a pleasant voice:

“Hello. I’m here to repair the air conditioning.”

“Oh! Hello!”

Behind the man, he could nearly see pure white archangel wings unfolding with a soft flutter.

‘Guess the boss didn’t want to die by my hands today yet! Congratulations on extending your lifespan!’

Yeo-woon was so excited that he kicked away from his desk to get up faster.

- I have to go. Someone came to fix the air conditioning!

He quickly left his computer, and less than a minute later, a small message notification window appeared at the bottom of the desktop, accompanied by the sound of another ding.

Business Partner: Hyung, you remember the bet you made with me, right?

(Next Part)