sob-berrys - Tumblr blog

[sob-berrys]

People are oceans. You cannot know them by their surface.

- Beau Taplin

[sob-berrys]

diary entry #2

I always wanted to be soft and sweet like the other girls, they're so beautiful and loved, why can't that be me, why do I have to be so cold and seen as mean. It's just not fair

-12/13/23

[sob-berrys]

no but you know what would be nice? experiencing the kind of happiness that doesn’t turn out to be a lesson that I have to mourn over for at least 3 months

[sob-berrys]

I hate this society. A father is supposed to be a shield for his daughters, not the source of their misery.

[sob-berrys]

family inconvenience

sometimes I feel like dying, but that's no good for me, 'cause, I can't feel like dying if it inconveniences the family.

like, what do I say? next Thursday, you're not free? a family lunch from twelve to three? alright, I'll wait, don't you anticipate my death alright, I won't inconvenience the family.

but

it's been six weeks, and I'm trying to do better but I'm not lying when I say sometimes it's hard to keep holding on when all my old friends are moving on, I'm slowly losing it losing that grip but I won't dare lose it yeah, I won't slip away and inconvenience the family.

but six weeks, and I know that secrets are not secrets if everyone knows, but while they act all fine, I'm dying inside—

will someone just set me free?

does next Friday work?

after I see the family? maybe then I'll have time for me and me.

[sob-berrys]

Kōtarō Takamura, tr. by Hiroaki Sato, from Chieko & Other Poems; "Two Under the Tree,"

[sob-berrys]

diary entry #1

why do I have to heal your wounds mommy, I cry and beg for you to listen to me but why can't you hear me, I promise I love you mommy please stop being angry.

-12/12/23