softistdom

[softistdom]

recently got back into the bdsm space and am back into nsfwblr; I wanted to tell you you've been one of my favorite blogs I've been following for a few years now !!

always lovely to see a post from you every now and then ☺️

Omg thank you, this is so unbelievably sweet. I haven't been active as of recent but I should come back 😭 need a muse or smth.

[softistdom]

[softistdom]

How does one politely ask “how many times did you get off to things I posted?” Without sounding like a creep lol

[softistdom]

i say we make some low quality amateur porn videos together 💗

[softistdom]

who’s obsessed with me lmk

[softistdom]

what if you matched my freak AND my loving heart huh

[softistdom]

appreciation post for tummies that hang, tummies swinging when you’re in doggy, tummies with stretch marks, tummies with extra or loose skin from bearing a child or weight loss / gain, tummies that have scars, tummies with freckles and moles and beauty marks, tummies tummies tummies

[softistdom]

round of applause for big areolas

[softistdom]

[softistdom]

everybody get more androgynous rn!!!

[softistdom]

hey, can I hurt you (flirting)

[softistdom]

Need someone to be a little feral about me

[softistdom]

So one of my kiddos is visiting for the weekend and we did a call ahead of time just to check in because it's our first time meeting in person. When we called he started asking me stuff like what kind of wound care materials I have, how I choke people, where is safe for me to hit. He apologized a few times for asking so many questions when he knew I was experienced and I told him something I think more young/inexperienced subs need to hear:

VET. YOUR. DOMS.

If you're playing irl don't be afraid to ask questions and quiz a dom on kink safety. Confirm that they both have the knowledge and know how to act on it. The RA in RACK is there for a reason. You and your dom both need to be aware of the risks inherent even in 'common' or 'low risk' kink activity. If you try to ask a dom questions or vet them and they respond with irritation or anger that should be a red flag. Never be afraid to protect yourself.

[softistdom]

The difference between being a dom and just being a plain ole dick is consent and aftercare.

Also remember to ask your sub what they like for aftercare because I have also met people that just want to be left alone for a while.

I want to share something someone told me when I first started out as a dom because it was kind of a lightbulb moment for me as an emotional sadist. At the time I was doing aftercare but I didn't understand what psychologically recovering from a scene really meant. Then someone put it into dom terms and it just sort of clicked. So I thought I'd share in case anyone else needs to hear it.

As a degrader and a sadist it's so hot that some subs will be as pathetic as you want them to be... so don't fuck around with their emotions outside of that, that sub is already literally playing with and altering their emotions for your benefit and pleasure. You're overstressing the emotion muscle if you do and rest is essential to any healthy exercise.

You're not giving their feelings any time to rest and recover if you cause emotional distress outside of playtime and you're not giving them the safety and security to play with their emotions again. If you consistently play with humiliation, degradation, or other forms of psychological sadism, you need to be aware of this and plan accordingly.

Avoid big talks or heavy topics immediately after, and do things that will lift your partner's mood in the days following an intense scene even if their mood doesn't need a lift. While you can't see it, by doing that, you've essentially put an emotional ice pack on a sore muscle.

For physical injuries lift the area affected so it can circulate and heal better. For emotional ones it's the same process, lift their mood so positive feelings can circulate and help the recovery along.

[softistdom]

She's a 10 but she needs you to look at her with animalistic lust in your eyes anytime you see her or she's going to think you despise her existence

[softistdom]

all boobs are good boobs. all tummies are good tummies. all thighs are good thighs. your body is perfect just the way it is, it does so much for you. don't let your insecurities tear you down.

[softistdom]

I love a touchy mf.. like hug me, kiss me whenever you want, just love on me