stevienixxes

[stevienixxes]

yeah ok crash out over

[stevienixxes]

Neutral shipper here!

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1. I don't believe the terms hold any real weight or power or even meaning. I've seen Antishippers with the same stances as Proshippers way more times than I can count. I've also seen both sides make claims about what their side stands for that actively go against everything they end up actually doing. For example proship is not and never has been anti-harassment. Some of the biggest proship blogs have been dedicated to harassing children who are uncomfortable with them. Constantly stalking kids accounts and posting them with easily findable tags for hundreds of hundreds of people to make fun of is genuinely disgusting. Antishippers also sure as fuck aren't anti-harassment either given they'll make lists of people to harass at times and then talk about how proshippers should literally get murdered.

2. My antiship experiences to be fair are all better than my experiences with proshippers as a whole. Which is incredible as considering Antishippers VERY often pull shit I absolutely despised dealing with. Antishippers have by and large gotten pissed to hell and back about my love for dark media and horror, especially when it includes more taboo themes. I used to get shit even while identifying as an anti for defending the artistic integrity and original meaning behind Killing Stalking. (I personally still get annoyed over people shipping the main characters but that's more to do with me being autistic as fuck and the idea of the two actually loving one another and being in a relationship that's real ruins the entire point of the story and I get frustrated with bastardization of things I find to be good depictions of psychological thriller/horror). I've also gotten shit because I'm a hypersexual switch who's into BDSM and most controversially slave play. As either the Dom or the sub in that scenario. Which to a lot of antis is apparently the same as me saying I'm a serial rapist and have no care for how evil abuse is.

As for proshippers... Harassment is when it's good. There's been a few proshippers who have been fine and by a few I mean I can list the names of 3 people total. The other hundreds of people I've interacted with have been the most depraved and cruel people I've had the displeasure of running into online. In fact they have called me more slurs than any alt-righter has. The amount of times I've had white proshippers explain to me why it's okay for people to appropriate native culture is crazy too. And again that's when they're being a bit more considerate by and large. The worst proshippers I've dealt with have been people who were literally outed as child abusers and groomers. I've never known an anti personally or talked to one who was later outed only proshippers. And I've also only been groomed myself by proshippers (all other abusers had no stance in the discourse). In fact I just got out of a literal cult ran by someone who's basically a proshipper that groomed me into being okay with them sexually abusing me and forcing a specific taboo kink onto me. A kink I was clear I was against morally originally. And then later it was clear I was grossed out by. But give it a year and it's hard to tell the literal leader of your cult no.

This isn't to say antis are incapable of that level of cruelty but it's more of a way to express what my experiences were and where my biases lie. I was an anti and a strong one until recently and even now I'm considering that the cult being what got me to even move to being neutral might mean I'm safer identifying as an anti again even if they're assholes consistently to me.

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1. Make sure it's something that's 18+ and then add multiple times that you have to verify your identity. It doesn't have to be ID when online only in real life. And it's by honor system as you see on most porn sites. Of course there's also gonna be a need for moderators to make sure they may be able to catch kids faking their ages. (I also think antiship and proship spaces both should be 18+ because to be blunt shipcourse is literally about fanfiction erotica)

2. I honestly couldn't care less lol. Dead dove do not eat is a useless tag and honestly unreasonably overdone. It's obvious the tags are supposed to be what's in the fic. If someone is miss tagging they're the asshole.

You say you’re an anti, despite hating on both of them almost equally, so I will still respect your stance.

I’m not touching on a lot of topics, particularly racism as that is the one I find to be the biggest no win. So I will not answer any following asks relating about that part. Nor will I discuss it here. (Since this has been something I previously had to deal with, I will address it directly. This isn’t against the anon here.)

And I’m sorry that you had such an experience, nothing about that sounds fun. Between being groomed, a cult and then being hated in your own community, nothing about that sounds like fun. I hope you are able to find yourself in a better place, mentally and physically (the mind has a huge effect on the body.)

It sounds like you have an absolutely complex relationship with the discourse, and I’m actually really happy that you say that the shipcourse is “literally about fan fiction erotica.” That seems like it would encompass the entire issue that I’ve noticed where antishippers are okay with blunt romanticism of violence, but god forbid someone write rape the wrong way. It’s a good summary that makes it more clear what this actually is even about.

[stevienixxes]

Ex anti ship and somewhat ex proship culture is,, why are you both stewpid. whats up with that man.

“everybody always seperates fiction from reality ever and if they don’t thats not our problem and your a bad person for asking us to be critical of the media we consume & as soon as somebody writes something down and claims is fictional//bases off of fictional kinks its okay”

No actually thats how we ended up with maga booktok who voted for trump because they like ‘morally gray men’ and that weird ass EDtwt groomer aesthetic that every aes account on there parodies for some reason, and you shouldn’t be jerking off to fanfiction of REAL MINORS because thats just actually pedophilia!! this includes child actors!!!

“Nobody truely seperates fiction from reality ever and if you consume media that contains dark content you’re going to molest a child IN T-MINUS 30 SECONDS!!1!!1! and if you engage in bdsm you condone misogyny’

No actually your literally just factually wrong, like theres scientific studies proving your wrong. and you sound like you’re a book burning conservative and one of the (around)47% of Americans who can’t read above a 6th grade level.

Sorry for the chronic yap, its just that nobody uses nuance in either side of the conversation and it drives me insane and makes me want to disconnect from both labels

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[stevienixxes]

proship culture is being an anti for a decade then realizing half of the things you ship could be counted as proship, and that you looking into proship wasn't morbid curiosity but instead being genuinely into proship.

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[stevienixxes]

proship culture is being an anti for years but then seeing your favorite characters in a weird age gap/grooming situation and loving it so much that you become a proshipper

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[stevienixxes]

i’m sorry this was a crash out post yall

fuck it becoming a proshipper some of you guys really are lame

[stevienixxes]

fuck it becoming a proshipper some of you guys really are lame

[stevienixxes]

wooaaaa just bound my chest for the first time and i feel fantastic but i have no idea what gender i am

[stevienixxes]

🫡🫡.

"proship DNI" my brother in Christ you are a Rick and Morty fan

[stevienixxes]

okay deadass i’m taking a walk and logging out of both of my tumblrs and all my socials 😭 got too chronically online there for a sec

[stevienixxes]

first of all: hello . i was originally just going to leave you be bc this is your private blog and this is YOUR space and i don’t feel like i have the right to infiltrate the space where you do you. HOWEVER, i get incredibly irritated when you put words in my mouth so here is some clarification (and this will be the ONLY time i interact with this blog before i hide it from my view and leave you to it)

my post was referencing this one of yours:

and i did get very irritated at the sight of it bc first of all, i never said those things, and second of all, you’re putting words in my mouth. i did not want to reblog that and argue with you (see my previous reasoning) but this post appeared on my dash after i had interacted with your account prior and i might as well say something.

THAT post was directed at me. i know it was directed at me, you know it was directed at me, and i was irritated that instead of coming to me so we could sort this out and i can tell you what i was trying to say, you instead turned to a community of people you knew would side with you and further vindicate you and your angry. that’s not how mature people handle situations, especially situations that cause you a lot of stress. please try to be mature.

1) you can also not see in my head. if i am attempting to be mean or rude, you will KNOW bc i will be aggressive (as in i will say very obviously nasty shit that cannot be misconstrued as anything but mean). the “talking shit” thing you mentioned was NOT talking shit, it was me just saying “wow, it sucks that my fav villain character is turned into a pedo in 3/4 fics he appears in.” and to further that, I DID NOT KNOW IT WAS WRITTEN BY YOU. it was anonymous, and you wrote me as someone who specifically targeted you for doing that. i did not. i have written similar fics (i have not published them except for maybe one sh fic to the mgst fandom and orphaned it) as a way to cope with my own trauma and mental health. i never made that post to attack you or talk shit abt ur fic, instead i was just expressing one of my frustrations in a lighthearted way (bc that was its intended tone). and again, bc it genuinely irritated me when ppl put words in my mouth, i never said joseph wouldn’t do that. i said he was depraved, just not sexually and that was that (which was also a half joke).

2) stop with the tracy situation. the tracy situation is OVER, and it has BEEN over for quite some time. i have SEVERAL TIMES taken accountability for the things that i said to her, and while i am still vaguely hostile toward tracy bc she did call me a waste of oxygen, if she ever chooses to upload another dark fic, i will not interact with it. it’s called learning and growing and bringing up old shit that’s been done is a step in the wrong direction.

my question to you is this, can YOU see inside my head? you cannot, and that’s why communicating like mature people is very important. yes, i have a DNI proshippers because i prefer not to even look at that content bc it genuinely frustrates me. i have put and said several disclaimers on my PINNED POST to not take what i say at face value bc half of the time, i don’t take myself seriously and no one should either.

that’s my only statement to you on this bc this is your personal account where you do stuff that’s purposefully not on your main and i understand it was very shitty of me to totally invade this blog, but i did really want to talk to you abt this. if you would like to talk more, you can DM me on this blog.

genuinely, i am sorry for any distress i have caused you. i never meant it that way, and if you took it that way i am BEGGING you to just tell me and i could’ve responded with a quick “nah i didn’t mean it that way, mb” and eased maybe just a bit of that tension. i hope that you’re doing alright. i know the struggles of sh and having such a fragile mental state that absolutely anything could send you over the edge. i get it. the only way i got through it was when i asked the people causing the stressors in my life for clarification— sometimes it ended badly, sometimes it didn’t.

you don’t have respond if you want, that’s perfectly fine. but just read it, that’s all i ask of you

"just @ me" bitch there's 1-1000 people I am talking about at one time. I will not "just @ you" because there are about 20 other people I'd need to "just @". And because you actually don't know shit about who I'm talking to. Can you see inside my goddamn head (and fucking understand this is why I still cut and why I still think like this and no I can't stop stopping is not an option that is why I made an entirely separate blog for this shit and the thought of cutting myself open and bleeding out has not left even though I'm scared of dying and don't actually want to do it). And none of you are @ ing me anyways so fuck off.

[stevienixxes]

OH MY GOD if you’re going to talk shit abt me and say what a horrible person i am HOW ABT YOU @ ME??? don’t be a pussy lmfaooo

[stevienixxes]

Tbh I'd much rather your reason for shipping something is just "I wanted to" or "it sounded cool" or "I find it cute/hot" than "there is not platonic explanation for this"

[stevienixxes]

can i hate for a sec? great

[stevienixxes]

@theenemyod if you don’t like me then block me bc we always somehow end up arguing with each other. i don’t want to see it and i know damn well no one else does as well

[stevienixxes]

oh my fucking god……

[stevienixxes]

i am going to wait an hour and see if i’m okay. if i’m not i’m going to call my girlfriend and if she’s asleep and doesn’t pick up, i’m going to call my sister, and if they don’t pick up then i am going to call my friend, and if he doesn’t pick up then i know