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[sulkinginpoetry]

Tears pour from me as you pour into me. I seek you so intimately, needing you, feigning for you, because the way you fulfill me happened effortlessly. Seeking this pleasure, wanting it frequently, never ending serenity. I’m dying of you absence, revived in compaction, centered in reactions and spoiled in nothing but your actions... sub space is here when I have you near, no fears just motions and gears. I’m in awe, ..... you are nowhere near and that is my true fear.

Nov 6,2019

[sulkinginpoetry]

...

I don’t even remember what it’s like for someone to look at me wantingly, with affection or just pure happiness or astonishment.. mhh those looks I always adorable but rarely received they were always special to me. That feeling being is to fade that vague remeberance dull and decayed. What it feels like to have affection knocking on your door to have a peace shared with someone more than ever before. To want them to know how much you have for them in store, to explore such a Love again will be a moment in which I hope to get to explore again ....

[sulkinginpoetry]

... the next time someone ask why am I single

My reply will be

It’s my own fault.

I’m clearly not ready to be loved or love anyone.

I’ll take the blame while I wait for you my love.

I won’t blame you I’ll just patiently wait for you.

Maybe your got lost on the way or maybe I’m just not on your radar yet...

I’ll keep holding it down until you arrive.

I’ll try to think of how worth it your love will be on night where I’m just hurting and want to give up on love.

I’ll think of the night to be had.

I’ll dream of the family outing and the kid(s) we will create.

I’ll dream of those sweet romantic moments no one else has been able to make happen.

I’ll be single waiting for you...

I’ll continue holding on to this special love for you...

I’ll keep remembering that we’re both worth such a love...

I’ll try not to get discouraged on long nights.

I’ll wipe my tears for you.

An I’ll hope you don’t forget I’m waiting to love you..

[sulkinginpoetry]

A place

I was starting to create this place, a mental space

A place for me and only me, a place of self love and solidarity

I was there for me and only me

Ready and prepared to be alone, to love me and to be free

You awakened that love that romanticism

I want to love ...

I want to kiss

I can’t hide my desire to love from the Universe

It’s my deepest wish..

[sulkinginpoetry]

[sulkinginpoetry]

Reality

Happiness is nice but joy is my favorite.

Joy is the know and belief that although today may not be the best but the future will be better the end game is my fortune.

The last couple days I have been dipped In sadness. I just sit in it, it’s part of growth it’s part of life. An the cycle.

I ignore it when I’m at work or school, but when I get a moment to sit it hits, my shoulder creep up my hand around my neck, closed behavior at its best pretending not to hear so I can imagine I’m really alone. Drowning out the people that truly don’t care expressing a behavior I enjoy and wish I displayedore often.

I don’t want to do homework, I can’t focus, I just am numb hoping a better distraction will come.

I deal with it on my own, I don’t want to talk about my feelings, I don’t require extra attention. I got here on my own an I’ll get out the same way.

I just set the tone and remember most of my life I have been alone ....

[sulkinginpoetry]

Touch Me, please

I have longed and yearned for your touch,

Craved and raved like you were ecstasy and you ignited a fantasy within me

Captivated and motivated to be excavated, a connoisseur for my art every bend and curve, fall and rise of my slight thighs, this pyramids you crawl between, those thin folds that are the most prettiest of molds that’s could render priceless or more bountiful than gold....

Touch me once more, so I can explore this high with you not only between my thighs but with me helping you rise ... I can get you high it’s Our time to rise .....

[sulkinginpoetry]

It’s the generosity and curiosity

Your search and seizure will not help you once you have amnesia.

Baby gurl don’t swallow these insecurities, they will only leave you choking. Don’t water down those insults, you are not sick they are not medicine.

That crown you put down only belongs on your head.

There is no time table for your thrown it is yours and yours alone. 

Out the womb you have already conquered you were born and the battle was won.

You are jeweled in tenacity bold in full capacity.

Triumph in each step

Your Kingdom awaiting your arrival

Take your thrown Young Queen

We will all witness the scene

June 11, 2018

[sulkinginpoetry]

I have become so particular.

I am beauty and softness cluttered in strength,

I require delicate love, admiration and determined preparation.

I am to be addressed with respect nothing less than carefully thought out adjectives to reflect your respect for me and your true goal to acknowledge my royalty.

Your goal to uplift, magnify and solidify that women ae Queens to be respected and possessed by none other than Kings and Qings.

To bring meaning and truth with the words you speak to build paths and castles to fortify and magnify a Queens essence and the ability to Rise.

May 16, 2018

[sulkinginpoetry]

Tenacity is my Chasity fight rhythm and rhyme to be your favorite line.

I realized that it wasn’t my time

I was a lost Mime with no lines wasted time, trying to sign you my love but you spoke against my touch

How could I not use a language to display my love

I thought it was Universal as a hug but again I was wrong a hug doesn’t equal love, it can equal an unwanted touch

 I cried for your love and something more than a touch

The delinquency and absence sent me abroad looking for a perfect cadence, so you could learn my love

I was no longer caught up, but free indeed looking to sow seeds

Call me easy I was flying like a breeze

I got you sneezing your allergic to me that was to easy we just weren’t meant to be

Not too often you can tame an Allergy

June 16, 2018

[sulkinginpoetry]

A Dream

My mid day nap proved to be one of the best I recently had.

I was in my apartment in my room watching tv, it wa roughly 8pm my room was light by the tv reflecting purple and blue hues. I noticed a small wooden door and decided to investigate. It was a typical mysteries wooden door, flat mental bars across with those bolds screws and a round handle. I opened the door to see a mystical lake with clear blue water. Approximately 50ft deep, huge rock formations were everywhere in the water coming front the bottoms of the lake. The ceiling housed beautiful plants that mimicked the appearance of jellyfish, bulb heads with extravagant tentacles. I stood out on the ledge and jumped into the water. There looked like many little caves and tavers graced the outskirts of this magnificent escape. The water was perfect a temperature could not describe it. The energy was solace, the sound of constantly running water and mystical secrects. The intention of revival and restoration. I wanted to stay there forever but I decide I would come often and stay longer and find myself here in this place. Another place symbolizing growth and peace. A new destination to replace the old one I create when I was young. This was my new Cave my new escape. I heard someone calling, I found a climbing path and made my way to the ledge, I looked back once more praying this place would not disappear. It was my new home a place made especially for me a place I which I would always be free.

[sulkinginpoetry]

Germany

My love I am starting to look for you around the world.

The castle in Heidelberg left acorns remains of your love within me.

The castle gave me ideas of our palace and the way our fortress of love should be.

The moat surrounding our love to keep those away, no trespasser allowed and our home a place of peace.

I tried a Mulberry and I hoped you would be as sweet.

Funny story I first found the tree overseas and here you are in Germany. You were small and just a bush but her you are a beautiful tree growing and flourishing to be something better than before.

I bought souvenirs to place in our home and to remind me of where the search began. I’m looking for you in Paris now, eventually when I find you I’ll have stories and the paths. Took but the Lord knows I’m not going to find you looking but I wish you were here. Until we meet Liebe ...

May 27,2018

[sulkinginpoetry]

Let me whisper untold poetry in your ear.

[sulkinginpoetry]

The process..

I have this wall, tempted to fall. Tempted to crush me and hide my belongings underneath it all.

[sulkinginpoetry]

Maybe

I am holding on to the pictures of us together, thinking if you come back, if we come together again they will show how we started and not just the beginning of when we end...

Maybe I still hope for you in my life.

Maybe I need to let go and realize that those pictures I loved but there a disguise.

Maybe when and I we reunite those pictures were that in the past.

Maybe there a hinderance of growth and I need to let go.

Maybe one day I’ll publish a poetry memoir and the pictures will depict the lovers I had. Reflect the lover I was and the lover who arose in triumph ..

[sulkinginpoetry]

Ass in the air, trying not to cry, wishing someone cared enough not to leave me alone tonight ....

[sulkinginpoetry]

Talk to me until I fall asleep

I want your voice to Lule me like a lullaby. Make me forget what life is like without your voice in my ear. What sleep isn’t unless your there .. let me sleep so peacefully with love so simple yet I feel it deeply ...