sunstarmo

[sunstarmo]

“Do you really gotta bring that thing to therpay?”

“Yes..?”

“Are you gonna bring that thing with you to work?”

“Are you gonna keep talking to me like that?”

“You better watch it.”

What did i DO LADY HELP. You wanna sit here and talk to me snarky, then get mad when i repeat it back?

[sunstarmo]

yall... I think my kangel is broken

[sunstarmo]

uhoh....

[sunstarmo]

IF I GET THIS ENDING ONE MORE TIME IMA IKMS

[sunstarmo]

HELP WHY AM I STUCK LIKE THIS?!!

[sunstarmo]

might play nso later because i am feeling like shit right now

[sunstarmo]

Hold me until i fall asleep, rub my back, play with my hair, tell me everything is going to be okay, your legs inbetween mine but not in a sexual way, fall asleep like that, say sweet things

[sunstarmo]

Do you ever miss the smell of the hospital / inpatient. Its been also 2 years now since i was inpatient and a year since i was outpatient, but i still remember and miss the smell. How hot the rooms got, the cheese sticks you could grab from the mini fridge if you where allowed out at night. The sense of freedom, and clean environment. Someone always checking in, feeling cared for. Sometimes i wish i would get sick again so i can go back there. The scrachty blankets, the uncomfortable bed, the soft pillows, the chairs that stuck to your skin.

[sunstarmo]

kinda need a #1 fan.

the type that'll stalk me and every post i make and obsess over whatever little attention i may give to them.

[sunstarmo]

[sunstarmo]

Who do you think you I am? What do you wanna say? What do you think will change? Maybe I'm afraid of you

[sunstarmo]

My chemical romance pixels¡! pt.1

(none of these is mine, all creds to their creators)

[sunstarmo]

Bikini Kill

Rebel Girl

[sunstarmo]

I need Luka to lose it

If Luka doesn't scream or growl in his next song (if we get one) I'm gonna be (lightly) mad, like ... it just makes sense?? He's been raised and trained to be this elegant and beautifully tragic idol, and his love was the opposite. I want him to take that chance that hyuna gave him to live on his own, I don't want the next song to be some kind of elegant and graceful symphony I was him to yell and growl and cry because he's lost the one thing that kept him together. We know his VA is capable of this, so let me hear it.

[sunstarmo]

Before Karma comes out I need all of y'all to lay off of the Luka hate.

NO Mizi shouldn't shoot Luka.

He is not the enemy in this situation.

The aliens are the ones who caused this and y'all are letting pettiness blind you. Luka didn't kill Till, the aliens did.

[sunstarmo]

Love is presented in many ways throughout Alien Stage: For Mizi and Sua, it's codependent, romantic to a worrying extent. For Ivan and Till, it's one sided, unrequited, and painful.

And for Hyuna and Luka, it's a curse.

Not only a curse, but one that haunts them. Jacob once told Hyuna to "Forgive yourself", which, to her, was misplaced. She could have forgiven herself. It was Luka who she couldn't forgive. But, in the end, she couldn't fulfill the legacy. She couldn't forgive herself for loving Luka. She couldn't forgive Luka for killing who she loved. And so, what did she do? She passed on the legacy.

The words "Forgive yourself" didn't help her. They built who she was, but in the worst possible way. She couldn't take his words, because she didn't consider herself the culprit, but the one she resented.

She told this curse, "Forgive yourself" again. She told them to Luka, sentence that almost sounded mocking on her lips. She couldn't have died before because she had to keep moving forward, but now, the pressure wasn't on her shoulders anymore.

She loves Luka, of course she does. But she cannot possibly forgive him. She knows he doesn't realize the suffering he inflicts. It's ironic, he's so unbearably smart, solving puzzles in a matter of seconds, but he doesn't know how to take in the real world, and the feelings of the ones around him, the most important 'puzzle' of them all. So, she gives him the biggest dilemma of his life. It's harsh, cruel, messed up in every sense. It's the puzzle she knew he could never solve, because she herself, who knew humanity, couldn't. Hyuna knew Luka loved her more than himself. And Hyuna cared for Hyunwoo more than for herself. Luka killed Hyunwoo, and so, Hyuna repaid him with the same coin, an eye for an eye. With an act that is the ultimate sacrifice, and the ultimate revenge.

As I have said, Hyuna knew the love he had for her, beyond the limits of his own body. She must've known how much her act would destroy his world: a fate worse than death. Her kind tone, telling him to take as much time as he needs to solve the newfound question she has proposed in such an ugly way, appears almost taunting.

And the way she holds him in her arms, purposefully close, and looks into his eyes, makes it just so much more painful. And yet, when she speaks her soul, passes everything she was carrying on her shoulders, over to him, her face is hidden away, buried in his shoulder. She's free. She finally had her revenge. She can forgive him, and then herself, even though the price was destroying him, without building him up again. Leaving him like pieces of a puzzle that never got solved. She's been cruelly betrayed, and she, even more cruelly, fed him his own medicine.

Hyuna is haunted by both Hyunwoo and Luka, similar to how Mizi is haunted by Sua. Hyunwoo brings the horror aspect: the bloodied blouse and head, while Luka has the smile that Sua has in the imaginations. The two people she loved most: the one who couldn't forgive her because she didn't get to apologize, and the one she didn't forgive. It's all so incredibly complex: she hates and loves, she resents and adores. Hyuna can't pick anymore. We're shown that she's such an active person, sociable, loving, having a whole group of humans just like her, and yet, we're told that she thinks all of them are selfish, even if they seem altruistic. She doesn't trust them, it seems it's a facade. In this, Luka and Hyuna are similar, but divided by the fact he wants to conceal his emotions, and she wants to make them more visible.

This page, specifically, made me click MiziSua and HyuLuka together. They look scarily alike. The same lovey-dovey expression, versus the distressed one of the lover, even the slight glow that Luka has is similar. I think this is meant to show that they still depend on each other, despite the fact that Hyuna seems to resent him so much.

Hyuna says Luka doesn't know the meaning of love. That the only thing he's ever shown, the only thing he genuinely knows, is suffering, and that his abilities basically stop at inflicting the same. (At least, emotional ones.) This is a parallel to Ivan, in my opinion, who didn't know love either, but he liked the idea of it. Instead, Luka loved with everything he had, even though he had no idea what it truly was. His love is obsessive, and somehow, so impossibly innocent at the same time. Because in a way, he's still a child. When he sees Hyuna, he becomes immature again, his facade of control dissipating into thin air. He mocked Mizi for her inability, but he's even worse.

According to his ear monitor, his heart was beating out of his chest. He could hear his own erratic heartbeat. It's painful, how happy he was, how excited, to be in her arms again. And yet, despite the love, the embrace was just as much of revenge.

Ever since Wiege, we've seen Luka smile so much. Just for him to never truly smile again.

I am a fan of the gentleness that Hyuna treats young Luka with. She seems awfully attached to the image of that innocence she knew. But it's not like Mizi's idea of Sua, the perfect one. It's an image she can't bear seeing again. "I couldn't stand seeing myself on those posters, because I knew exactly the face the you'd have. Yes, I bet you were smiling ear to ear." We've only seen him like this for the first time, but to her, it was so familiar, even years apart, she still knew.

Another thing I have noticed is that Hyunwoo's grave is right infront of a tree, almost separated from the others, just the way Luka was sitting before Hyuna found him. Now, this time, Hyunwoo lost Hyuna, and he's forever forced to be lonely in the garden he'll never grow out of.

Hyuna wanted to give Luka a rubik's cube he wouldn't be able to solve, something difficult. A rubik's cube can represent human nature, who Luka seems to have mastered completely. But Hyuna finally manages to postpone him: the puzzle is herself.

And in the end, after Hyuna's body goes limp, he finally manages to take her in his arms. He promised that there, she'd be safe, but he didn't manage to keep her that way. And suddenly, the words "My Savior" from Ruler of my Heart are awfully true.

[sunstarmo]

People really like to talk about how Luka is one of the most docile competitors when it comes to obliging the aliens: he is the fan favorite, behaves well during interviews, and diligently fulfills his role of an entertainer. However, during the rounds we barely see his childhood/past.

In Wiege, we finally get some answers regarding how he was born and raised. This scene, in particular:

It's obvious that Luka broke into this place without permission, given that he's holding something that he's likely used to rip the capsules with naked bodies inside. His left hand is on the switch, and the scene ends with aliens reaching out to him.

This is the first instance of Luka's rebellion that we get to witness.

His body is frail, there are many frames of him being connected to the monitoring devices. It paints a picture of him being highly dependent on the support that his owner provides. One might think this is why he wouldn't dare to against the rules.

Which is why I find the second frame so interesting.

His room is covered in posters of a known "human terrorist", and he kisses Hyuna's image in front of the cameras. He isn't afraid of getting punished for it, and that makes me wonder if the owner knowingly indulged him in this one obsession, under assumption that it'll keep Luka compliant.

This scene takes place later, and he's visibly less shaken up by what's in front of him. People in the first one didn't have the incisions, so it's likely that they were tossed away before the aliens could start the surgical procedures. We later see similar scars on Luka's body.