sunsummoncd

[sunsummoncd]

nightmare starters

“Wake up! Wake up! It’s just a dream!” “What were you dreaming about…? You were shouting…” “I woke up because you were screaming so loudly.” “Shh– No, no, don’t panic, love. You’re safe now.” “It was so real! I swear! He/she was here!” “I don’t ever want to sleep again. What if– what if I dream about that again?” “If you tell me, it’ll go away. That’s what my mum/dad always told me and it’s never failed me.” “Do you want to go back to sleep, or shall I make you a cup of tea?” “I don’t want to go back to sleep…” “I’m so scared… I can’t stop seeing what I just saw. It was so vivid!” “There’s really nobody here, okay? Do you need me to show you around to prove that to you?” “How do I know I’m not still dreaming? You’re acting really strangely.” “Let’s get you to the shower, you’re covered in sweat.” “There’s really nobody else here.” “You’ve got a really bad fever. That must have caused those weird dreams.” “I don’t even know what a peaceful night’s sleep is like anymore.” “I can’t do this anymore. These nightmares have to stop…” “Shh, it was just a bad dream. Just a dream, okay? None of it was real.” “I can’t go back to sleep after that. I need coffee– no, I need a drink, a stiff one.” “How long have you been having these nightmares?” “I’ve had nightmares all my life, but they’ve been really bad recently.” “You get so worked up before you go to sleep, maybe you should try to relax a bit more. Maybe then you’ll get some rest?” “I’d kill for a peaceful night’s sleep.” “A dream catcher? Honestly? I’m not a child.” “Nothing’s ever helped this. I just need to learn to live with the fact that sleeping will always be a nightmare, literally.” “I’m so tired… but there’s no way I’m going back to sleep after that.”

[sunsummoncd]

I love when people are genuinely excited about our plots/ships. I love when I’m not the only one who’s like “!!!” I love it. @ my partners you will literally never annoy me by being overly excited about our ships I love it so much.

[sunsummoncd]

Alina grinned. “One of the few perks of being a saint is that it’s apparently blasphemous for you to pose for portraits.” She attempts to hide the smugness from her voice, but in truth, she was immensely glad she hadn’t been made to sit stiffly for hours, even if she had to listen to the apparat’s wisdom.

Yet even though she hadn’t been watched for hours, Alina still felt sealed away. She was near desperate to explore Os Alta without the restrictions that were normally placed upon her. The freedom that came with status had far more chains than one would expect. 

She felt as if she needed to escape.

In a move that almost felt too bold to Alina, she grabbed Nikolai’s hand and tugged him toward the lodge. She felt an almost childlike glee as she began to increase her pace. “What are we waiting for? Let’s go.”

@sunsummoncd // alina.

nikolai finally made it out into the COURTYARD and away from people - any breathing creature with a body heat seemed troubling at this point, he just wanted to plunge into the icy river and RELAX.

although the SOOTHING presence of the sun summoner was something that he can’t find himself to complain about. “my cheekbones are getting exhausted with all that smiling for portraits.” truth is, he can’t really last being in solitude for so long - mouth easily parched with less or no talking even for a small fraction of his day.  and thus, the invitation. “would you like to get out of here?” his head jerked towards the servants’ lodge so they can grab enough peasant robes for their little ESCAPADE into the open city.

[sunsummoncd]

starter call!

hit the heart for a starter!! if you’re a multimuse, let me know which muse you want it for, and if you want it in a specific verse, let me know!

[sunsummoncd]

❛ i suppose the secret is that i cannot stand being alone. but there are some places no one can go with us. ❜ from gen

where’s the alina content u cowards (aka king of scars sentence starters) // @oflegendaries

Hearing Genya speak like this was chilling to Alina. Her friend was usually so bright, so exuberant. Alina could fill a room with literal light, but it was Genya who brightened everywhere she went. It felt like someone had turned off her lamp, or blown out her candle, and there was nothing Alina could summon to make it return.

And she could empathise, she had ventured into swathes of shadows only she could light, she had crossed seas to capture creatures only she could trap. She was absolutely terrified the entire time, and her only comfort was herself. Now, she far preferred to stay in the company of others, to let troubles be collective rather than solitary. 

There was unimaginable comfort in knowing you weren’t alone, and unimaginable fear in knowing you were.

So she held out her hand for her friend to hold, though she knew that it wasn’t enough, that in many ways, it could never be enough, and they both had to find some way to cope with that, to cope with the idea that no matter how much you wished to help, you couldn’t always do so.  

“Even if there’s places I can’t follow you, or places you can’t follow me, I know we will think of one another still. I think sometimes that has to be enough.” Her voice was soft, perhaps a little shaky, because she believed what she said so strongly. She couldn’t offer Genya the help she needed, but she could try to communicate how much she cared, and that, she hoped, could be enough.

[sunsummoncd]

❛ here is a place to hide when you’re frightened, to play when you’re bored, to rest when the world seems unkind. ❜ from gen

where’s the alina content you cowards (aka king of scars sentence starters) // @oflegendaries

There were many hiding places in the Little Palace, and even after all her time here, Alina was still not aware of them all. Even after all her time wandering at night and searching during the day, so much of it was still hidden to her. So when Genya told her to follow, she followed, because she trusted her friend, and because curiosity often got the better of her.

The floors were cold beneath Alina’s bare feet, because though she knew she shouldn’t treat the entire Little Palace like it was her bedroom, she’d grown accustomed to doing so over the years. 

Besides, it was nice feeling like she was sneaking around with Genya as if they were both still just young girls with indeterminate futures, not two of the people in charge of the fate of their country and the people within it. In all truth, Alina really did need a place to hide when she was frightened, because having that much power always scared her just a little. She had seen how power could change people at their very core. She’d seen the difference in herself too, she had seen how close she had gotten to letting the corruption that power could have rend her whole mind. Now, she lay awake at night, thinking of how to keep herself in check. 

They path they look led on for what seemed like a short time, though Alina had no clue. She had been wandering through her thoughts rather than consciously wandering through the palace. But when she saw when Genya had led her, she couldn’t help but let out a loud gasp, before exclaiming to her friend, “Gen! You’re a genius.”

[sunsummoncd]

❛ the trick to acting is to believe the lie yourself, at least a little. ❜ from gen

where’s the alina content u cowards (aka king of scars sentence starters) // @oflegendaries

The thing about Genya, was that even though you might expect her specialty to be changing appearances, she was so good at changing how you thought on the inside too. She encouraged, listened, and gave Alina confidence that she didn’t know she had.

But the issue here, was that she would have to believe herself just a little bit saintly, and that is where her acting fell short.

Because it is very, very, difficult to see yourself as the possible saviour of your country when you know how hard the saving will be. When you lie awake at night wondering if the power at your fingertips really can spread across your country’s not-quite-coastline. Whether it was the darkness or light inside of her that would win out in the end.

Genya had made her look the perfect matyr for the event, eyes bright and curious, rather than sleep deprived and sallow. She’d dressed Alina so that she looked fit to be royalty, rather than disheveled and unravelled. Yes, Alina did look the part, but convincing a room of ambassadors and religious figures that she was the saint they had been led to believe would be far more difficult. 

Particularly because she didn’t quite believe it herself.

“Maybe the trick to acting is you tailoring yourself to look like me and then pretending to be a significantly more charismatic and confident version of me?” Alina’s voice was hopeful, perhaps a bit too hopeful, and not quite joking enough.

[sunsummoncd]

                                        * . ✧ CIRCE ✧ . *

                                               - STARTERS -

❝ He showed me his scars, and in return he let me pretend that I had none. ❞ ❝ Humbling women seems to me a chief pastime of poets. ❞ ❝ I cannot bear this world a moment longer. ❞ ❝ You cannot know how frightened gods are of pain. ❞ ❝ I would say, some people are like constellations that only touch the earth for a season. ❞ ❝ You have always been the worst of my children. ❞ ❝ I will do as I please, and when you count your children, leave me out. ❞ ❝ When I was born, the word for what I was did not exist. ❞ ❝ When we are young, we think ourselves the first to have each feeling in the world. ❞ ❝ I will not be like a bird bred in a cage. ❞ ❝ This is what it means to be alive. ❞ ❝ But perhaps no parent can truly see their child. ❞ ❝ Yet because I knew nothing, nothing was beneath me. ❞ ❝ Some things are worth spilling blood for. ❞ ❝ You can teach a viper to eat from your hands, but you cannot take away how much it likes to bite. ❞ ❝ You threw me to the crows, but it turns out I prefer them to you. ❞ ❝ The grudges of gods are as deathless as their flesh. ❞ ❝ Those who fight against prophecy only draw it more tightly around their throats. ❞ ❝ Who knows what is in me? Will you find out? ❞ ❝ Bold action and bold manner are not the same. ❞ ❝ How many of us would be granted pardon if our true hearts were known? ❞ ❝ If you want it, I will do it. ❞ ❝ All my life I have been moving forward, and now I am here. ❞ ❝ Fear of failure was the worst thing for any spell. ❞ ❝ Imagine such a happiness. Like drinking wine your whole life, instead of water. ❞ ❝ Most men do not know me for what I am. ❞ ❝ You are right, this world is a wild and terrible place, and worth shouting at. ❞ ❝ He was no husband, scarcely even a friend. ❞ ❝ We bear it as best we can. ❞ ❝ Timidity creates nothing. ❞ ❝ It is youth’s gift not to feel its debts. ❞ ❝ What was I truly? In the end, I could not bear to know. ❞ ❝ They do not care if you are good. They barely care if you are wicked. ❞ ❝ Oh, sweetheart, it cannot be done. ❞ ❝ Lady, you and I are in accord. ❞ ❝ Why should I care what is in their hearts? ❞ ❝ You must keep your tricks close or you will lose everything. ❞ ❝ I never claimed to be good. ❞ ❝ My whole life, I had waited for tragedy to find me. ❞ ❝ You must understand people if you would rule them. ❞ ❝ Be sure not to dishonor me. ❞ ❝ Do not try to take my regret from me. ❞ ❝ Even those who had loved me a little did not care to stay. ❞ ❝ I can please you, I swear it. You will find none more loyal than me. ❞ ❝ I do think he loved me a little. ❞ ❝ Well? What do you have to say to me? ❞

[sunsummoncd]

also if you’re cool with pre-established relationships/dynamics where we skip all the awkwardness of starting to roleplay with someone new and jump straight to plotting a little and tagging each other in stuff hmu

[sunsummoncd]

hey kids, like this post for an alina in ur askbox hehe!!

[sunsummoncd]

odd eye circle

[sunsummoncd]

❛ just think of all the dinners and tea and dancing. ❜ (wylan @ghezenblessed!)

where’s the alina content u cowards (aka king of scars sentence starters) // @ghezenblessed

In terms of attending Little Palace functions, on a scale of David to Genya, Alina was probably in the middle. She didn’t really mind parties, in fact, she often could like them. It depended on who would be there, how long the event would last, and whether herring would be on the menu.

The last criteria could truly make or break a party. 

But seeing the way Wylan’s eyes seemed to light up at the prospect of a real Little Palace ball, Alina felt excitement bubble up in her too.

She recognised the look in his eyes from the way she had looked on the night of her first real Little Palace gala. She hoped he’d feel as dazzled as she had. Minus the politics, treachery and escape attempt later that night.

She was determined to be for Wylan who Genya had been for her. Minus the trying on the Queen’s clothes. Though she guessed that could be arranged if necessary. It had been fun after all.

“Well Wylan, the main things you’ve got to know is how to waltz, how to navigate the buffet table, and how to not strangle nobles who have a stick right up their ass. It’s a fine tuned art, but I’m sure I can teach you.”

[sunsummoncd]

❛ overreacting is throwing a tantrum when someone eats the last sweet roll. you were out for blood. ❜ (tamar from @magicstarved!)

where’s the alina content u cowards (aka king of scars sentence starters) // @magicstarved

It hurt when someone you loved hurt. It hurt when they had no avenue to admit that they were hurt. It had always been that way.

You pricked someone she loved, and Alina bled.

Alina was fine with most of the rumours that swirled from the Grisha guard, from the First Army Soliders . She was fine with being called the Darkling’s whore, with hearing whispers of her as Nikolai’s mistress, because she knew above all else, that she wasn’t the men that others would attach her to. 

Not everyone would consider her a saint, and she was self aware to not want that of everyone. 

Yet when the rumours turned away from Alina, when the whispers of bastards and whores and villains long gone were not aimed at her, her hands couldn’t help but ball into fists, and hold them there until the anger was over. Often, marks from where her nails had been held stiff remained until the next morning. 

Yet this time, she could not hold her breath. The whispering voices were hitting a part of her heart that had remained long hidden, and it stung like nothing you would believe. 

When she was a part of the First Army, the bigger soldiers never expected her to talk back. Now she was in the palace, people expected her to act like the saint they thought she was. No one expected a short and grumpy girl to throw her fist at their jaw.

The crack that had resounded was the unpleasant sound of Alina’s knuckles breaking against the solider’s chin, bone catching on bone. As she pulled her hand away, both satisfied and shocked at what she had done, Alina paled. She had faced kings and queens, wrestled with monsters both familiar and foreign, and it took seeing her bleeding hands to make her think she had gone too far. Now, she was sitting with Tamar, who seemed to be both protecting Alina, and stopping her from going and finishing the job she started.

Tamar’s presence was calming to Alina, but not the soft calm one would expect of a friend, the kind of calm you felt when sitting on a rock face looking out at sea. The kind of calm you knew would never waver. 

“You know,” Alina whispered, “I have trained myself to stay away from a lot, but those type of comments break me every time.” She sounded wistful and wounded, a tone of defeat heavy in her voice. 

[sunsummoncd]

❛ hand me that brandy. i can’t tolerate this degree of stupidity on a clear head. ❜ (baghra asfksdsfgksdg @magicstarved)

where’s the alina content u cowards (aka king of scars sentence starters) // @magicstarved

Alina begrudgingly obeyed her mentors order, and not even that begrudgingly, because as much as she pretended not to, Alina had an overwhelming amount of respect for Baghra. 

Not that she would ever let her mentor know. Alina would rather have Baghra catch her dancing naked in the Little Palace gardens than admit that she owed so much to the old woman before her, because like it or not, Baghra had shaped Alina into a force to be reckoned with, and if Alina had not met her, perhaps she would still struggle to call a sunbeam. 

Perhaps, she would still need the Darkling’s knife to cut her to make her answer the call of the sun inside her. 

But never mind that thought, because she could answer her power, the call and response that summoned the sun came easily now, and so she called, allowing sunlight to fill the hut, even though the moon was bright outside.

As for why Baghra thought she was stupid? That could just be considered her mentor’s predisposition where Alina was concerned.

“You know, if you want me to keep this place lit so you can see enough to pour a glass, you might want to consider flattery instead.” This was just the way it was between them, the to and fro of Baghra’s insults and Alina’s comebacks and complaints, and though it should seem tiring, it was, to Alina, safe and comfortable.

[sunsummoncd]

❛ then i’ll just have to blow a hole in the wall. ❜ (ghezeblessed!)

where’s the alina content u cowards (aka king of scars sentence starters) // @ghezenblessed​

Alina had many feelings about explosives. She thought they were cool, exciting and very useful, as long as she was far, far, away from them. Considering she was standing right next to Wylan and his explosives kit, her thoughts were more along the lines of, run away as fast as possible or die.

Yes, she knew that they were perhaps on the brink of a discovery, if she was just brave enough to light Wylan’s way as he blew a hole in the side of the Petrazoi mountain range. There were likely some artefacts, or a tunnel, or perhaps even a secret chamber that could reveal the answers she had been searching for. The answers as to why she could summon the sun, the answers as to how and why Grisha power was the way it was, answers so ancient, to questions so ancient. 

In the years after the civil war, Alina had been examining herself. She had been wondering why she was the way she was. She had truly been listening to the questions she had asked herself on the day she had discovered her powers. I can’t be Grisha. How? How does this all work? Why me? 

Questions that had bothered her for a week, disappeared, and resurfaced what felt like a lifetime later.

And yes, she wasn’t expecting a straight answer, she wasn’t expecting a neat book explaining the connection she and many others had to the world around them, but maybe a journal of a ‘saint’ like herself from times past, maybe a statue that she could examine for clues, maybe anything to offer clues into both the past and future. 

So she steadied herself, because her hunger for answers was greater than her fear of obliteration, looked Wylan dead in the eyes and nodded.

“Do it,”

[sunsummoncd]

a few v; meant for something more notes

i have been thinking about this verse, and Alina’s possible role in post war Ravka. Of course, Alina would help the Triumvirate, she’d offer strategic advice, and also heavily advocate for those whose lives were destroyed by the civil war, she knows how it feels to have war tear you from your home and family, after all. She’d sit with Nikolai in boring meetings and follow Genya around parties. She’d spar with Zoya and build mirrors with David. She’d avoid the Apparat in the palace halls and wander the gardens at night.  She’d secretly visit the former location of the shadow fold and try not to weep as she remembered who fell there and whose hand it was by.

but i also think Alina will be considering the nature and origins of Grisha power, and the way that plays into Ravkan politics.

I think she would start to help with the training at the Little Palace, she’d kind of be like what Bahgra and Botkin were for her, for current and future Grisha recruits. She’d be able to understand one, what it’s like to be without a family, but also how it feels to be thrust into a world where your strangeness is celebrated, and what it’s like to suddenly learn you have a magical ability, especially if you only felt at most ordinary before.

but also, I think Alina would be heavily interested in answering the questions she had the first day she discovered her powers. Why her? Why was she the Sun Summoner, what attracted this power and responsibility to her?

She really wants to understand Grisha power on a fundamental level, understand whether saints of the past were saints in the same way she was, or whether they really were just performing miracles. 

Alina goes searching for evidence, she goes searching for the reasons why she is the way she is, she goes looking for answers to the questions that plague her as she tries to sleep. She adventures into mountains, she walks to the sites of supposed miracles, She tries to feel the energy right at the heart of the world, feel the echoes of miracles performed long ago.

because she can’t help but feel like there’s a reason for all this. 

she can’t help but feel like there must be a reason for power. she can’t help but wonder if power has helped or hurt her.

she wants to know.

[sunsummoncd]

SENTENCE STARTERS → KING OF SCARS BY LEIGH BARDUGO.  BEWARE SPOILERS. feel free to edit to fit your muse / situation. 

❛ i like to keep you on your toes, [name]. constant anxiety does wonders for the complexion. ❜

❛ when you purse your lips like that, you look like you’ve made love to a lemon. ❜

❛ how is it i smell like goose shit and cheap whiskey and you smell like you just ran through a meadow of wildflowers? ❜

❛ perhaps i should have brushed up on my prayers. ❜

❛ you don’t enter a fight you can’t win. ❜

❛ then come here, [name], and kiss me sweetly as a new bride would. ❜

❛ we’ll tell each other lies as married couples do. it will be a good game. ❜

❛ how can you be so sure? perhaps the list of my talents is so long you just haven’t gotten to the end. ❜

❛ it will be all right. we’ll solve this problem as we’ve solved all the others before. ❜

❛ when the gods give you another look at the world, best enjoy it. ❜

❛ if men were ashamed when they should be, they’d have no time for anything else. ❜

❛ i know. [place]. if the cold doesn’t kill you, the smell will. ❜

❛ well, lucky you, [name]. you’re about to acquire me as a wife. i enjoy long naps and short engagements, and i prefer the left side of the bed. ❜

❛ fears are like weed. they grow wild if left unattended. ❜

❛ must you insist i stay human? ❜

❛ if i told you we needed magical dust to make me vomit peppermints, you’d probably say you could rig something up. ❜

❛ i’m afraid i have more bad news. ❜

❛ just think of all the dinners and tea and dancing. ❜

❛ one day you will overstep and i will not be so forgiving. ❜

❛ do that thing you do where you use too many words to say something simple and confuse the issue. ❜

❛ did i not promise particularly delicious trouble? ❜

❛ how drunk am i expected to get before this all starts looking better? ❜

❛ i knew you would turn on me. i just didn’t think it would be so soon. ❜

❛ i’m at my most murderous on an empty stomach. ❜

❛ i’m not keen on riots. unless they involve dancing, but i believe those are usually referred to as parties. ❜

❛ every day you choose the work of living. every day you choose to go on. there is no failure here, [name]. ❜

❛ i know you think me mad, but i have seen miracles. ❜

❛ here is a place to hide when you’re frightened, to play when you’re bored, to rest when the world seems unkind. ❜

❛ are you sure you don’t want to try trusting me, [name]? it’s positively intoxicating. ❜

❛ overreacting is throwing a tantrum when someone eats the last sweet roll. you were out for blood. ❜

❛ i suppose the secret is that i cannot stand being alone. but there are some places no one can go with us. ❜

❛ desperation makes people do ugly things, and it is always the girls who suffer first. ❜

❛ you owe me an entire crop of apologies. why start now? ❜

❛ hand me that brandy. i can’t tolerate this degree of stupidity on a clear head. ❜

❛ the trick to acting is to believe the lie yourself, at least a little. ❜

❛ is this the part where we die well? ❜

❛ i am the weapon. i don’t need a cudgel or a blade. ❜

❛ you can make up any happy ending you want, but you know it’s true. don’t ask me to sacrifice the hope of the living for the comfort of the dead. ❜

❛ i like to bet on myself whenever i can. but usually with other people’s money. ❜

❛ everyone mourns for the first blossom. who will weep for the rest that fall? ❜

❛ i will remain to sing for you, long after the spring has gone. ❜

❛ i’ve never met anyone like you. ❜

❛ when i said you were talented, i meant it. when i said you were glorious, i meant that too. ❜

❛ most women suffer for the sake of the flowers. but we who would wield power adorn ourselves in flowers to hide the sting of our thorns. ❜

❛ do not look back. your future is waiting. ❜

❛ can you forgive us? for being foolish? for being frail? for being fallible despite our great powers? can you forgive yourself? ❜

❛ i’m trying to do the responsible thing. i think it’s giving me indigestion. ❜

❛ why is it so easy for you to contemplate your death? ❜

❛ i suppose the world would be less interesting without you in it. ❜

❛ i wanted…strength. safety. i never wanted to feel helpless again. ❜

❛ i always figured i’d die young. why not do it shoving my boot up that murderer’s ass? ❜

❛ if we don’t dream, who will? ❜

❛ come back. promise you’ll come back to us. ❜

❛ of course i’ll come back. i don’t trust anyone else to deliver my eulogy. ❜

❛ remember who you are. ❜

❛ you were an able student. prove to me that you are a great one. ❜

❛ stop punishing yourself for being someone with a heart. you cannot protect yourself from suffering. to live is to grieve. ❜

❛ please don’t leave me. not you too. ❜

❛ what is it to be a god without worship? a queen without subjects? i was the witch in the wood, the queen on her throne, the goddess in her temple. i will be once more. i will savor fear and desire and awe again. ❜

❛ this time i saved you. this time i got it right. ❜

❛ i’m sorry for the hurt i caused. i’m sorry to have lost your trust. but we are soldiers, [name], warriors born. and we do what has to be done. ❜

❛ my only comfort is that you never could have been mine. but know that i would have gladly been yours. ❜

❛ you’ve been seen on the grounds, though no one seems to know where you go. ❜

❛ how could the world be falling apart before sunrise? it wasn’t civilized. ❜

❛ of course you should keep him here. preferably stuffed above my mantel. ❜

❛ now put on your most devout face, [name]. you make a darling heretic, but i need you looking pious. ❜

❛ we begin in darkness, and it is to darkness we return. ❜

❛ i’d like to see if an excess of irony can actually kill a man. ❜

❛ that’s what [name] said about absinthe. ❜

❛ it still tastes like sugar dipped in kerosene. ❜

❛ [name] does not need or want our approval. ❜

❛ [name], you are trespassing in territory you cannot begin to understand. ❜

❛ [name], if you upset my [wife/husband/etc.] again, i will kill you where you stand. ❜

❛ you’ve never threatened to murder anyone for me before. ❜

❛ i am a [king/queen/ruler]. i long for entertainment. ❜

❛ it’s not exciting if nothing can go wrong. ❜

❛ if they were truly afraid, you wouldn’t have to simper and preen. ❜

❛ regicide isn’t on my list of preferred crimes. ❜

❛ i saw nothing without explanation. ❜

❛ one of the only joys left to me is courting danger, and [place] offers few opportunities for it. ❜

❛ it’s good to be home. ❜

❛ sometimes you have to feed the demon. ❜

❛ i once got drunk and insisted you make me blond. ❜

❛ i wish there were no one in the world but you and me, that there were no countries, no kings and queens. ❜

❛ as free as i’ll ever be. ❜

❛ perhaps some light torture, then? or you could just let me kick him in the head for the next hour. ❜

❛ [place] made me a soldier. [place] made me a spy. ❜

❛ then i’ll just have to blow a hole in the wall. ❜

❛ our first job is always to survive. i won’t apologize for it. ❜