survivourship-blog

[survivourship-blog]

“Sometimes I forget that I’m a person. I just go through the motions.”

It’s a heartbreaking confession to be on the receiving end, the extent of trust required to voice such a personal weakness equal to the amount of courage needed. It was an issue personally experienced in a greater magnitude, a traumatic incident that had born a permanent physical reminder that would remain until the day he died. That had been a particular happenstance whereas this was… everyday life. To essentially lose the urge to really, truly, live the way all humans are intended to, to just go through the motions like Shiro had admitted  –

It was no different than being dead.

“Shiro… Listen, I  – ..” He began haltingly, hesitance clearly visible in the tenseness of his frame. Wetting his lips, he attempted to move forward once again. “I forgot I was a human once.. I lost what made me who I am. I was unrecognizable, just another monster for everyone to fear. Hard to believe, I bet.” A wry smile tugged at the corners of his lips, the mood infinitesimally more somber due to inexplicably rare show of seriousness from the ordinarily affable man. There was another pause, this one purposeful rather than unintentional, the brief stretch of silence used to snuff out his cigarette and gather his resolve, attention only momentarily diverted before it was refocused with a new intensity onto the distraught individual he’d come to know as a friend.

“Here’s the thing. You listening, Shiro? Pay attention.” As though sudden life was breathed into him, the commanding tone demanded that the words to come be heeded. A hand came up to curl fingers around the back of the younger’s neck in an unyielding hold, making it impossible to simply avoid the steadfast gaze of the determined Corporal. “Even then? Even when I was that lost in myself? I managed to remember who I was. I came back from it. It wasn’t all me. No, it was too much to go alone. I had some good friends that made sure to remind me just where I belong. So what I’m getting at is ..”

Fingers tightened their grip marginally and shook the younger slightly, ensuring he was still following, still listening, before the sure hold was used to haul Shiro forwards enough for their foreheads to rest against one another’s. “Fall back on us. Don’t push out the people that care. And if you let us help, you’ll see that you’re not just going through the motions. You’re be living.”

[survivourship-blog]

Existential Crisis Sentence Starters

For interactions in which your muses feel like having a deep, terrifying discussion about life. 

“I wish I could go back.”  “Did your life turn out the way you expected it would?” “Sometimes I think if I just did one thing differently, maybe none of this would have happened.” “What if we ran out of goals? What would we live for after that?” “I feel like I wasted too much of my time.” “Do you ever get that feeling like you’ve lost something you can never get back, but you don’t know what is was?” “I find myself missing things that I didn’t truly appreciate when I had them.” “Where do you think you would be if we never met?” “I hate thinking about the past and wondering if I ruined everything.” “Would you start over if you had the chance?” “I wish we could slow the whole world down.” “If you could take back one mistake, what would it be?” “If you didn’t wake up tomorrow, would you be satisfied with today?” “Sometimes my body just doesn’t feel real.” “I’m terrified looking up at the sky. It reminds me of how small I am.” “I wonder, in the grand scheme of things, if anything we do will make a difference.” “Do you ever get that feeling that you just don’t matter?” “Sometimes I forget that I’m a person. I just go through the motions.” “I think what you’ve got is called ‘dissociation’.”  “Nothing feels real anymore.” “Don’t you get anxious when you realize time just keeps going and going?” “I sort of envy people who don’t get anxiety over just existing.” “You never know how much time you have left.” “Just think about how big the world is. You’re not even a drop in the bucket, we’re more like molecules in a drop.” “Do you really think, hundreds of years from now, anything we do will mean a thing?” “Maybe I need to stop thinking so much and just live.” “If you keep worrying, you won’t get anything done except for worry.” “Maybe we shouldn’t think so deeply about it. In the end, I’m not sure it matters.” “What do you want to be remembered for?” “How long do you think people will still talk about us after we’re gone?” “I think as long as you lived your life how you feel was right, it’s never a waste.” “Do you think everything happens for a reason?” “I’m not sure if fate is real, or if things just happen because they happen.” “There’s never enough time. You just have to make use of what you have.”

[survivourship-blog]

Wounded Sentence Starters

“It’s just a scratch. You worry too much.”

“Ah… ! Don’t press there!”

“Just put a bandage on it and I’ll be fine.”

“That looks bad. Really bad.”

“Try not to look at it.”

“That hurts!”

“You’re going to need bedrest for at least a few days.”

“I’m going to be stuck in bed for how long?”

“That’s nothing, you big baby.”

“Here, let me help. I’m good at this sort of thing.”

“I can’t feel it. That’s bad, right?”

“Can you move?”

“How can something so small hurt so much?”

“It looks a lot worse than it is.”

“You’re a terrible patient.”

“Will you hold still? I can’t do anything if you keep squirming.”

“Wow, I’ve never seen skin turn that color before.”

“It’s just another a war trophy.”

“Shut up and let me help you.”

“I don’t care how tough you are. You can’t ignore that.”

“I’m sorry. This sort of thing makes me nauseous.”

[survivourship-blog]

rabbitcrowned:

    Alice turns the strange device over in her hands; a cellphone they had called it and left it at that. She doesn’t know what a cellphone is, doesn’t know what it does, but she’s a little too prideful to ask. Oddly childish and wanting to prove herself in this new place even if there isn’t anyone who knows her. She wants to be able to say I figured this all out by myself to show she is capable even when alone.

Bored, she tosses the cellphone in the air lightly and notes the weight of it when it lands back into her gloved palms. Heavy, but in a way that’s unsatisfactory when compared to other things she’s used as weapons. It must be a weapon if not anything else. (She had tried to take a bite out of it, and found it disgusting and unforgiving on her teeth, so what else is it good for?)

It does remind Alice vaguely of a rock, and rocks are quite useful thrown. Pleased with herself, Alice grins and pulls her arm back to release the cellphone in a throw she personally finds quite impressive. The projectile hits something soon enough, someone rather, and she’s disappointed by its premature stop caused by the person’s leg.

“You got in the way!” she shouts, a little miffed at her spoiled project.

It was a beautiful day to be assaulted completely out of the blue.

The very small flare of pain triggered by the hit was inconsequential, not even able to cause the beginnings of bruising. That could be written off, it wouldn’t take much more than an apology since there had been no real harm done, but the sheer unpredictability of the blow did wound his pride when it utterly destroyed any semblance of balance he had. Knocked off kilter, Lindow was sent stumbling forward several steps before he was able to find sure footing again and he was quick to round about, ready to demand some kind of explanation for something that was entirely uncalled for.

"What the he –” Abruptly cutting the expletive short upon noticing just how young the offender was, the accusation downright flabbergasted him. He pointed animatedly at himself, eyes shifting between the child and the projectile now laying prone upon the cement. “Me!? You’re the one throwing –what even is that, a rock!?– your cellphone at people! I’m the innocent one here!” And then just to hammer the point home, “That’s not a toy, you know. It’s not meant to be thrown!”

[survivourship-blog]

distantemperor:

He eyes the man with consideration. Not at all annoyed, calm, his expression bordering on smug. Oh god its another Alfor. He feels his teeth grind against each other before he could even stop the rude action.

“Fine. Get some food for the alien, see if I die from one bite. Sure. I’ll trust you.”

He stands up.

“Alright, lets get some food.”

Its risky though. But will it be worth it? Possibly.

He blinked at the mention of the foreign word, having presupposed the man wasn’t entirely human from the very beginning. In retrospect, Lindow hadn’t fully been one himself even before the transformation and subsequent mutation he’d undergone, the alteration of cells that all God Eaters underwent tweaking their DNA just enough to read as something else. And so he’d held his tongue on the matter, awaiting permission to breach the topic since putting someone on the spot about what could be a sensitive topic wasn’t something he was keen on.

"Alien, huh? Not really sure what that is, to be honest. And I’ve seen some things you wouldn’t believe,” he casually commented, ushering the monumental man to follow him on over to a vending machine positioned outside a nearby restroom. “That won’t stop me from feeding ya, though. No one should go hungry.” After voicing that belief Lindow jerked a thumb towards the varied snacks lying just behind the clear screen, a wide smile on his face.

“See? Easy.”

[survivourship-blog]

sleepxrcell:

“ Good luck with that. ” Shiro bid the stranger a wave of farewell and had begun to shift his weight to step away when he was stopped by the sudden, excited outburst. If it wasn’t for the fact that he had essentially been playing babysitter for years to four teenagers who had the same enthusiasm for… pretty much everything, it might have actually startled him. Instead, he took it in stride, an amused chuckle rumbling in his chest as he followed the man’s gaze across the street to the bar.

The former paladin did have his more adventurous days when it came to drinking, but those had all fallen to the wayside over time. There was too much at stake, too many responsibilities on his plate, for him to actually think about getting drunk. Or enjoy himself in general, some might say. Not to mention he had a hard enough time perceiving reality without any distortion from strange substances.

Instinctively, the bulk of Shiro’s body locked up a bit when the impressive weight of the gauntlet draped over his shoulders. His attention would have lingered on the marvel of metalwork for longer if the man who sported it hadn’t made it his personal mission to try to drag him into a downward spiral of drunken debauchery. “ Woah- Wait, hold on a sec. ” He babbled in lighthearted protest but his companion didn’t seem like the type to take no for an answer. Perhaps he needed to embrace some of that free spirited nature himself. It had been so long since he had been able to take it easy, to let go of his worries even for a little bit because stopping had meant risking the enemy regaining their strength. After two years of nonstop confrontation in the cold blackness of space – as well as internally battling homesickness and the festering wound that was his memories of captivity – a break was certainly well deserved.

Slowly the tension eased out of his muscles along with his inhibitions and he gave in, lumbering alongside the insistent stranger toward the bar. “ Alright. Maybe just one drink. ”

Any protests were short-lived, hardly spoken before the man simply opted out, resigning himself to the shenanigans that were in store. It brightened Lindow’s mood even more so, the prospect of having an amicable partner preferable to having to relentlessly attempt to get someone to loosen up even the slightest bit. He shook the other man a little with a short burst of laughter, fingers gripping his shoulder reassuringly as his free hand pushed the door open to allow them entry into the fairly populated pub.

Scouting out a vacant spot took more than a passing minute due to how many people were currently milling about, but a booth in the far back turned out to be their destination. It was only once they’d arrived that Lindow finally relinquished the hold on the stranger that, in all honesty, he’d all but apprehended, practically throwing himself down unceremoniously into a seat with the expectation that the younger man would follow suit rather than take the opportunity to flee. He appraised the lively crowd with the relaxed demeanor of a man completely at home in the environment, a direct opposition to how disoriented the situation of residing in this new city made him feel.

"I didn’t expect it to be this crowded. That can only mean good things, though,” he animatedly chattered, making to pick up the proffered menu that the attending staff member bought over to them. He offered a quick thanks before rubbing at his chin thoughtfully, perusing the presented selection as the woman gave a few suggestions, but one drink in particular caught his eye. “I think I got it. Could we get a couple of these to start? Three pints each sounds like a good warm up. We’ll definitely be ordering more after that, but we’re gonna have one of these babies for sure before we go.” Shielding the menu from view in order to keep the whole of the order a secret affair, a finger gestured to the seductive allure of the Milky Moonlight, one of the two signature drinks that looked too good to pass up. 

Business concluded promptly, having made it all too apparent just how well-versed the God Eater was with alcoholic beverages, his attention refocused on his newfound companion. “That should keep us going for a while – .. Uh..” Lindow started but no sooner drew a blank when he made to refer to the other by name. Brows furrowed as he tried to recall if they’d even exchanged them to begin with, and with the realization that they in fact hadn’t, the elder lightly smacked his own forehead as a self-reprimand. A sheepish smile was given, a gold plated hand offered across the table to correct the error. “Looks like I forgot to introduce myself in all the excitement. The name’s Lindow. Lindow Amamiya. Good to meet’cha.” 

[survivourship-blog]

alexei-cain:

“ Tch. Well, ain’t this place fancy. ” Cain muttered disdainfully as he let himself into the condo, his cigarette pinched between two leather gloved fingers. Combat boots clicked against the floor as he stalked around the main room like a predator parading about a territory it had just claimed. The place － Hell, the whole ward － put the shithole of the colony he grew up in to shame.

Of course, he expected nothing less from Earth considering all the pompous, holier-than-thou pricks he called commanders hailed from there. The marble streets and staircases that greeted him as he stepped out of the car moments earlier had been almost laughable, a true embodiment of excess that made him expect Commodus himself to grace him with his presence. No… More than likely he’d be thrown in the gladiator ring for their amusement.

It’d been some time since room accommodations had been new at all, the same quarters having been occupied for the entirety of his career until just prior to this relocation. That hadn’t even really changed even after marriage and a child following shortly after, and he’d been comfortable in the unchanging familiarity. This was in no way similar to what Lindow was accustomed to, the overly lavish property something that was hard to entirely believe was real, so unlike the Outer Ghetto in every aspect and somehow even superior to the housing provided to God Eaters. 

Despite the overwhelming grandeur, it seemed like even it had it’s limits by being a shared space instead of individual housing. The Corporal had been semi-aware of the fact that roommates were bound to show soon enough, but the abrupt appearance of the catankerous individual noisily moving about still managed to catch him off guard. He angled his body sideways just enough to face the other man from his place comfortably relaxed on one of the sofas residing in the main space of their quarters, offering a brief wave.

“Oh, hey  – Yeah. Yeah, it’s something all right. A little overkill, in my opinion. But you won’t see me complaining. When you take into account how much we lost, it’s only fair that we get something in return. I mean, not that I care about this kinda stuff over .. you know, all the other stuff. There’s not a cold day in hell I’d prefer some fancy quarters over my wife or ki –” 

Teeth bit down marginally on the cigarette perched between his lips to stop the unintended oversharing, drawn out shortly thereafter by two gold-tipped claws. The fingers of his free hand scrubbed roughly through the unruly dark strands of his hair before he titled his head backwards to fall over the back of the couch, eyes closed in resignation. “Ahhh. I’m just ... Forget it. I’m gonna quit while I’m ahead.”

[survivourship-blog]

distantemperor:

Its like a combination of Alfor and blaytz in front of him. He frowns, expression darkening to a annoying degree as he simply looks at the other without much thought to why this was annoying him.

Oh right. He was kidnapped, his empire is in shambles and everything horrible has happened already. And he misses her.

“I’ll transfer whatever money you want to your account if you shut up for the whole month. Is that a good deal. I’m busy.” brooding.

Then a lion roars.

no thats his stomach.

“Resorting to bribery? Haha  – You must be getting desperate.” And acting overly dramatic, but he refrained from adding that little tidbit on. “If we’re being honest here, there’s no way I could go a whole month. I don’t think I could even last a day.” That definitely wasn’t something to confidently state as though proud of that fact, seemingly all but bragging about his chatty nature. “Besides, I bet you don’t have much to your name right now. Doesn’t seem like a lot of people do.”

He paused momentarily in consideration and then cracked a bold grin. “But if ya give me a chance, I think I have a solution to that beast of a stomach of yours.”

[survivourship-blog]

sleepxrcell

It had been nearly five years since Shiro had been home, but it felt like an eternity. After all, time wasn’t exactly easy to keep track of when your consciousness was trapped in the boundless quintessence of some inter-dimensional battle lion. Even if this wasn’t quite the deserts of Arizona, the familiar surroundings were a welcome reprieve from the infinite expanse of space where everything wanted to eat or kill him. Who ever could have predicted that something as simple as a traffic light, crude as it was in its antique form, could have been so welcoming.

Since his arrival to wherever the Hell this was, the former paladin had spent much of his time wandering the streets and letting everything sink in. If this was a dream, it all certainly felt as real as the concrete of the sidewalk beneath his feet. Though it wouldn’t be the first time is mind had played tricks on him like that. For all the time that he’d spent mapping out the little ward he was supposed to call home, he had kept his interactions with others to a minimum. The curiosity was there, of course, but it was also accompanied by a healthy dose of suspicion.

That was why the former paladin instinctively squared his shoulders when someone he’d been passing waved him down, half expecting confrontation since that was all he’d been faced with lately. There was some semblance of comfort in the man’s shared frustration with the situation, though, and Shiro found himself easing into a more comfortable stance. “ Sorry. I wish I could help, but I’ve got nothing. ” He regretfully told the other with an apologetic quirk of his lips. If he could call on the quintessence within his prosthetic he might have been able to singe the tip of the cigarette, but something about this place seemed to have disrupted the flow.

There went that idea. Not like there were any hard feelings considering there had been a slim chance to begin with, but the disappointment it brought only caused the pit in his stomach to grow all the larger. It really wasn’t like him to dwell on the negative, always the one to spout inspiring words or cracking the odd joke to dispel any dejection. This time shouldn’t be any different even if the circumstances were substantial, in a way very vaguely resembling the nightmarish time he’d previously spent separated from his allies. At least in this scenario he was in control of his own actions, no fear of reeking cataclysmal destruction, of gravely wounding those he cared about most, present here.

All he had to deal with no longer having those cherished people in life.

Right, not a big deal at all.

Heaving another burdened sigh at the dismal turn of thoughts, it was time to try his hand at getting himself back together. “Don’t worry about it. There’s gotta be a place to get one somewhere around here. I’ll scout one out later,” he assured, casually shrugging a shoulder in a ‘what can you do about it,’ manner. Later was going to come up sooner than implied, a migraine sure to crop up in growing intensity the longer he went without nicotine. In fact, perhaps he should set out now before the sky darkened even further, and the other man surely had his own errands to take care of before the upcoming nig ––

“AHHH – HOW DID I MISS THAT!!” In the middle of aiming to offer one more expression of gratitude and then a well-timed farewell it finally come into perspective that their little interaction had been taking place just across the way from a local bar. Smoking may be temporarily out of the realm of possibility, but drinking himself stupid was a readily made option that he planned to take. “It’s like an oasis in the desert! I’ve found Nirvana! And buddy, you and me? We’re gonna drink deep of it’s bounty.” Not one to drink alone when a perfectly capable companion was available, Lindow threw his heavy, gauntlet clad arm around the other man’s shoulders and begun ushering him towards the establishment.

[survivourship-blog]

fenreater started following you

“Hey, Alisa! You’re a real sight for sore eyes. Not that it’s really been that long, but – you know what I mean!” With a genuine smile brightening his features a heavy, gauntlet clad hand ruffled the light colored strands atop her head, leaving behind a disheveled mess. “It’s good to see you. Mysterious, ‘we’ve been left in the dark without a light,’ circumstances aside.”

[survivourship-blog]

@cocoonied

“What .. is – What is that?” A finger was pointed in astonishment at the unrecognized creature fluttering delicately around the youth’s body, completely dumbfounded by the look of the thing.  “It sure as hell ain’t a bird.”

[survivourship-blog]

distantemperor

It was like dealing with Blaytz all over again. Expect he couldn’t even blame the hormones of a alien species on this one [or could he]. He’s not a expert in human biology [he learned the name hours ago] but he knows that there will always be some idiots around.

“And what part of , go away don’t you get.” as if in defiance for the man, he places his wooden club on the space beside him. There now theres no more space at all left less he sits at Zarkon himself.

“Now that’s a power move.”

Gratified laughter accompanied an enthused grin, the other man’s show of defiance having the opposite effect on the God Eater. If anything, it’d only made him want to continue prodding until he got a more expressive, possibly explosive, reaction. All in good fun, of course.

“What I don’t get? Hmm.” He rubbed at his chin in mock thought, crouching down as a substitute for the being denied a seat. “Probably the part where you expect me to believe you really want be to all alone. It gets pretty old, pretty fast.”

[survivourship-blog]

@sleepxrcell

For all intents and purposes deposited into unfamiliar territory with little rhyme or reason, it was an understandable detriment to morale and a just cause for falling back on a token vice.  Nicotine certainly wouldn’t accomplish anything of real substance, but it would definitely help curtail the restless twitch of his fingers, help him remain levelheaded until he managed to wrap his head around this whole situation. 

A quick pat down of his uniform’s pockets found a half-empty, crumpled cigarette carton, yet the search did not result in locating his trusty lighter. Tongue clucked once in dissatisfaction and what resembled a pout fluttered onto his lips for a brief moment, Lindow no sooner making to hail down a passerby of a similar looking age with the unfounded belief that he might be able to lend a helping hand.

“You wouldn’t happen to have a light, would ya? Could’ve sworn I had mine on me before this  –  whatever the hell this all is.” An aggrieved sigh helplessly slipped out, gaze drifting to the side as his flesh hand rubbed almost self-soothingly at the back of his neck. “Not .. like I can do anything about it now. But, damn. Of all the times.”

[survivourship-blog]

Intimately familiar with handling people plagued with this particularly special brand of difficult disposition, the impressive bulk on display failed in impeding the Corporal's progressive approach. It didn’t even succeed in causing the jaunty little smile playing on his lips to waver, little able to be done to prevent Lindow from pursuing any goal he set out to accomplish.

"Come on, there’s no need for that. It’s not like I bite or anything. Now, if you do...” A shooing motion was carried out with a hand, a prompt for the strange individual to move aside to provide enough space to share the bench. “Well, I think I’ll take my chances.”

survivourship liked your post “Innocent -ish Garla in the city. Small starter call but uncapped!…”

Crowds were sometimes too much. trigel would say he is anti social. Zarkon would say to shut it before he punches Alfor. Alfor would say why. in any case he doesn’t deal well with the crowds, which is why he had isolated himself in the nearby bench where he had commandeered his large size as a tactic to scare people away. these…non alteans. 

 “Go away.’ he says to one brave looking one. 

[survivourship-blog]

Applying as Lindow Amamiya from God Eater with prior reserve! His application is /application. Thank you!

Welcome to scenic Isola Radiale, Lindow!

You will be housed in CONDO 423.

You will retain your enhanced strength at half potency and will receive a wooden sword.

– mod pleiades.

[survivourship-blog]

THE BROTRAYAL IS REAL

DILF

“This, coming from the man who is an actual father.”

[survivourship-blog]