#//Take Jean for example; with her; he’d take random breaks just to show up to her office

[dutybcrne]

Kaeya having become adjusted to a significant other can and WILL drop I Love You’s at the most ransom times and even the most random of places

[flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash]

Irresistible Danger - Part 52

Synopsis:  After being caught outside the compound on your own, Negan decides to punish you in the best way possible ;)

Words: 4,063

Warnings: nsfw, smut, swearing

ID Masterlist can be found HERE

Masterlist of all my fics can be found HERE 

Author’s Note: Woo for another chapter! These Friday updates make me even more excited for the weekend, so I hope it does the same for y’all. I also hope you’re ready for this third outing with Negan ;)

Gentle Heat

At 4:57pm, you strode down the hallway and towards the front door of the Sanctuary. You had Ricardo hefted up over your shoulder, and gave him a little twirl reminiscent of a certain leader with his own handy-dandy weapon. Your brain and subconscious walked excitedly on either side of you, both of them happy, content, and finally on the same emotional page since the conversation with Negan last night. 

When you informed Ben at the beginning of dinner prep that you had to leave once the food was ready, he had flashed a knowing smirk and gave a sassy ‘mmmm hmmmm’ in response, earning himself a playful shove. He had laughed and then said he’d make sure to leave two containers of leftovers in the fridge for when you got back. When you hadn’t corrected the container amount, he had only grinned harder, and you couldn’t help but smile in return. Ben and Negan would never be best buddies, but you could finally see the potential for them to at least be cordial acquaintances, a thought which caused another of those darned warm and fuzzy feelings in your chest. 

Mind returning to the present, you pushed open the heavy front door and squinted into the warm rays of sun that would last for a couple more hours before sinking into the horizon. When your vision had adjusted to the light, you saw that Negan was already waiting at the front gate, gaze fixed in your direction. Fighting the ridiculous grin that tugged at your lips, you started walking purposely across the asphalt towards him, perhaps putting a little more sway to your hips than was necessary. Your eyes took in his tall and delicious form, subconscious almost tripping over its own feet at the sight. A white tee was peeking out the top of his slightly unzipped leather jacket, and his gloved hands held Lucille. Vowing to have them also hold you by the end of the outing, you felt a spark of excitement at the thought of that soft leather running over your skin, this time with no interruptions. 

Stopping a foot away from him, both of you raked greedy eyes down over the other. While you tried to be a bit discreet in your ogling, his stare was blatant, taking in your peach-colored t-shirt, form-fitting jeans, and boots. A grin curved those sinful lips as he drawled, “Afternoon, doll.” 

Unable to help a tiny smirk in return, you calmly replied, “Good afternoon, Negan.” 

Eyes twinkling knowingly, he turned and looked over at the Savior on gate duty. A subtle nod of Negan’s head was all it took for the man to hurriedly unlock and open the well-oiled metal. 

Once you were out of view of the Sanctuary and enclosed on all sides by trees, he stopped and turned to you. “Well, doll?”

“Well, what?” 

He lifted Lucille straight out in front of him and panned her over the surrounding forest. “You’re running the fucking show, so where to?”

Delight lit up your face at the realization of what he was offering. He’s letting you be in charge this time! Your subconscious procured a red cloak and tiny wicker basket out of thin air and frolicked off into the trees, while your brain took out a magnifying glass and started studying an odd-looking insect resting on a nearby bush. Torn between which one to follow, you landed on a mixture of both, and started off in a random direction with a bit of extra pep in your step, taking everything in. 

You wandered around that way for a while, taking the time to explore all the wonders the forest had to offer now that you weren’t faced with a mission of picking berries before the clock ran out. Negan was a good sport about it, following dutifully behind as you slowly meandered around in a haphazard pattern. It dimly registered that you didn’t even hesitate to worry about where you were going, trusting him to reign you in if you strayed too far from the Sanctuary or caused him to lose his bearings. 

At one point, you stopped at the sound of rustling, both Lucille and Ricardo raised in readiness. However, the would-be assailants turned out to only be a pair of squirrels. You both stood silent and frozen, watching the furry little creatures happily chase each other through the brush before racing up a tree. Moving on, you stopped at times to inspect certain plants, but since your knowledge on horticulture wasn’t extensive, you refrained from touching the ones that looked foreign. Negan stayed dutifully silent and uncomplaining a few paces behind, as if he knew how much you needed this outing, how much you had needed a bit of fresh air and freedom from the Sanctuary that you didn’t have to steal or that wasn’t dictated by someone else. 

However, this was Negan you were talking about, and his patience wasn’t infinite. You knew it had finally worn thin when you abruptly stopped and bent down to smell a pretty yellow flower and heard him give a low groan of frustration. Freezing at the sound, you turned to look at him. He might be standing a few feet away, but his gaze was fixed with laser focus on your bent-over ass. 

Interest quickly moving from your surroundings and towards a more arousing topic, you straightened and quipped, “What? I didn’t think we were in a rush to get to grandmother’s house?”

Instantly recognizing the metaphor, his eyes twinkled with both merriment and something a bit darker...something a bit dirtier.

Tongue tucking into his cheek, he looked you down and up before replying, “I didn’t realize that was the game we were playin’, Red. Should’ve fucking said so sooner.”  

With that, he strode towards you, his long legs quickly eating up the distance. He fit the Big Bad moniker perfectly in that moment, his eyes glowing wolfishly with intent.   

Feeling both adrenaline and desire course through your body, you did the only thing to be expected of Little Red in a situation such as this. 

Giving a huff of excitement, you turned tail and ran. 

~  ~  ~  ~  ~

You must have taken Negan by surprise, because initially you only heard silence in response. You hadn’t even hesitated to consider what to do if he stayed put, instead knowing that he would follow and chase you down. Sure enough, you had only sprinted a short distance before the unmistakable sound of heavy but agile footfalls arose from behind. Grinning, you jumped over a large branch laying across the ground, incredibly glad that the ankle you had twisted during your last forest adventure was healed enough to handle this sudden strenuous activity. 

The footsteps grew louder, and you knew he was closing in when you could hear the unmistakable sound of leaves brushing against leather as he pushed past the same hedges as you had only a few seconds earlier. Knowing the chase was almost at an end, you suddenly swerved to the left and darted behind a nearby stout bush that came up to your waist. 

Turning around, you expected Negan to burst into view on the other side of the bush...but instead were met with silence. Brows furrowing, you strained to listen, certain he had been just behind you a moment ago. When there was nothing, not even a rustle of foliage, you felt a prickle of worry dart down your spine. Had he fallen? No, surely you would’ve heard that. 

“Negan?” you hissed, visions of him being grabbed by an enemy group or knocking himself unconscious the same way you had not too long ago racing through your mind. 

Hefting up Ricardo, who you had been clutching in one hand at your hip while running, you slowly went back around the bush and retraced your steps. Trying to walk as lightly as possible, to avoid any unnecessary noise, you had tiptoed about thirty feet and were just passing the wide trunk of some large tree, when a strong arm darted out from behind it and snagged around your waist. Another hand flew over your mouth, cutting off your sharp scream. You registered that it was encased in leather at the same time the hair stood up on the back of your neck, both clues pointing a bright neon arrow to who you captor was. 

Before you could decide how to enact your revenge for his deception, he spun you around and pressed your back into the large tree. Surprise and loss of balance from the quick maneuver caused you to drop Ricardo, and a second later his hands pinned yours to the rough bark at the same time that a muscled thigh slid between your legs, anchoring you in place.

Despite sprinting after you through the woods, he didn’t even appear to be breathing heavy, the jerk. Meanwhile, you were making more than a small amount of effort to catch your breath from all the exertion, darn your out-of-shape ass. Course, some of the accelerated breaths could also be a result of having such an attractive alpha male using his entire body to pin you against a tree. Not to mention the way he was staring at you with a devilish glint in his tawny gaze. 

Leaning down, his raspy drawl came from right beside your ear as he murmured, “Checkmate, doll. Your move.” 

An unexpected rush of emotion rose within you at the words. What had initially started out as a condescending phrase, one he used to taunt and exert his power, had then changed into more of a challenge thrown down by you during the chess game. After that, it had been transformed into a type of endearment, a way for both of you to check in with the other. It was yet another example of how far your interactions with Negan had come, how far your feelings towards each other had come. 

The phrase had always been a precursor to a nonverbal response from the other, and you weren’t going to break that trend now. Head turning, your lips brushed over his bearded cheek, seeking out his mouth. When your lips connected, you sighed and poured your soul into the kiss. It was heated with both desire and an emotion that was slowly making itself impossible to resist. One that both terrified and thrilled you with its possibility. You knew he had received the nonverbal message when the hands previously pinning you gentled, leathered fingers threading with yours until they were intertwined. His kiss consumed you, tongue thrusting inside your mouth in possessive, delicious strokes until you pulsed with need. His head then tilted to the other side, as if he wanted to explore from every angle, as if he couldn’t taste you enough. 

When you had melted into him with willing submission, he pulled back from the kiss and gazed down at your desire-hazed expression, the silence dragging on for long moments as you took each other in. His eyes were full of what could only be described as gentle heat, showcasing both his desire and his...affection. It was a look that you didn’t even think was in his repertoire, much less one that would be directed at you. You weren’t sure what your own face was conveying, but whatever it was, he seemed to like it, his lips ticking up slightly on one side. 

Leaning back in, he went for your throat this time, beard brushing over sensitive skin as he found the spot he had quickly learned caused your head to fall back in surrender. Lifting one leg, you wrapped a thigh around him so that your hips pressed together. 

Giving a frustrated groan, he murmured against your skin, “I’m a fucking fool.” 

“What?” you dumbly replied, stiffening slightly. Had you misread that moment of connection just a few seconds ago? Had he not meant to-

“I didn’t bring any fucking condoms. I thought you’d be so busy traipsing around the fucking woods that we wouldn’t need one til we got back.” 

His face was still pressed into your neck, lips moving over your flesh in hot, open-mouthed kisses, so he missed the mischievous smile that crossed your face. “My bra.”

His head did lift at that, and it was his turn to dumbly say, “What?”

Giving a light laugh, you tugged at his hands so he’d let go, fingers dropping to reach inside the modest neckline of your shirt. He followed the movement with curiosity, and you saw the lightbulb go off in his head a moment before you pulled out the tiny foil packet you had put in there earlier. 

Brandishing it in front of his face, you quipped, “Glad one of us came prepared.” 

Tongue tucking into his cheek, he gave an obscene smile. “That’s my girl,” he purred, the words causing heat to simmer in your belly.

Reaching down for the button on your jeans, he continued, “We’ll have to make it quick, doll. And quiet. Don’t want any fucking walkers catching us with our pants down.”

Only able to nod in agreement, your eyes were locked on the sight of his leather-encased fingers lowering the zipper of your pants before they gripped the fabric at the sides and tugged both it and your panties down. You had to lower your leg from his hip for him to do so, and he cursed under his breath when he came upon the obstacle of your knee-high boots. Kneeling, he quickly unzipped and yanked them off before returning to the removal of your pants. A dart of heat went through you when he tugged the garments off and stood back up, taking in the sight of you standing before him and naked from the waist down. 

“Fuck, that’s a pretty picture,” he breathed.

Taking your mouth in another kiss coated with blatant sensuality, his hand slipped between your thighs, two gloved fingers pushing inside and caressing your flesh in expert strokes. His thumb ran through the wetness, dragging it up to coat your sensitive clit. Breaking the kiss, your head fell back against the tree, breath panting when he started rubbing in soft circles with the perfect amount of pressure. It was a touch meant to steadily drive up your pleasure without being too quick or overwhelming. 

The feel of the smooth, buttery leather sliding over and inside you was sublime, yet also taboo enough to make you clench around him with the dirty thrill of it. The fingers inside scissored, stretching you for his greedy cock. Looking down, you saw that it was currently straining the front of his pants in a way that made you grit your teeth to hold back a moan. 

Deciding that turnabout was fair play, you reached for the fastening of his pants, quickly unbuckling his belt and pushing the fabric down below his hips, along with the boxer briefs. When his cock came into view, it was already red and swollen, the fat head glistening with a drop of pre-cum. You felt a bit dizzy at the sight, excited by the illicitness of fucking out in the open like a pair of wild animals. Wrapping a hand around him, you marveled once again at his impressiveness. His girth was more than a handful, and yet to the place currently aching for him, you knew it would be a perfect fit.

His eyes fluttered closed with a groan when you started stroking his cock, thumb running up over the slit with each pass. His obvious enjoyment of your touch sent a rush of wetness between your thighs, as well as giving your ego a jolt of empowerment over the fact that you had such an effect on this handsome-as-hell man who was usually so in control of every situation. It was an intoxicating feeling, one that you were already becoming addicted to. Not wanting to wait any longer, you leaned forward and nipped at the tanned skin of his brawny throat. 

“I want you to fuck me like this, right now,” you said, a bit surprised at the command in your tone. 

His eyes popped back open as he gave a pained growl and grabbed the condom out of the hand not stroking his dick. He ripped it open, and you reluctantly let go so that he could roll it on in practiced strokes. 

“Hurry,” you urged, back arching into the trunk of the tree and hips pressing into him, feeling the tip of his shaft brush against your soaked entrance. 

He didn’t disappoint, strong hands hooking around the backs of your knees and lifting you right off the ground, at the same time that he entered you with one long thrust. 

You couldn’t hold back a cry at his intrusion, a gloved palm quickly covering your mouth to muffle the sound. Pushing two leather-covered fingers past your lips to press lightly on your tongue, you realized they were the same ones that had been between your other set of lips just a minute ago. Giving another primal moan at the filthiness of it, you sucked on his fingers, faintly tasting your own musky essence under the more prominent and earthly flavor of the leather. 

“Shit,” he hissed, also struggling to keep from making too much noise as he started up a deep, steady rhythm with his hips, your ankles criss-crossed together behind his ass and urging him on. 

Grabbing the bottom of your shirt with the hand not in your mouth, he yanked the peach fabric up to your chin and pulled down the fabric cups of your plain white bra. Your breasts popped free, presented to him on a platter with the underwire still keeping them elevated. He buried his face in them with a muffled groan, his beard causing delicious friction as his mouth feasted on your soft skin. You moaned around his fingers when he took a taut nipple between his teeth and bit gently before laving it with his tongue. 

Despite the fact that you were both still wearing some of your clothes, it wasn’t as quick a fuck as he had warned. His thrusts were more relaxed than urgent, but no less devastating since each one seemed to drag his cock in a way that hit every sensitive nerve ending you possessed. He was using his body as if it were a tool designed specifically to pleasure you, and he slowed down his thrusts even more when his head lifted and he caught you in his hooded, tawny gaze. He watched you closely as his hips possessed and retreated, your thighs squeezing on the sides of his waist and your own hips lifting away from the sharp bite of tree bark to meet each thrust. The fingers in your mouth slipped out, replaced by his tongue, as he kissed you slow and deep. 

The forest blurred around you, any outside awareness dwindling until all you could see and feel was him, and you dimly realized that this wasn’t fucking. No, with the way your bodies pulsed and hearts pounded in unison...this wasn’t anything other than making love. 

Despite the unhurried pace, the pleasure continued to build, pushing you steadily and inexorably towards the precipice that always promised ecstasy. You were releasing little whimpers against his lips, hands clutching at his shoulders as your muscles started tensing in a way that let you both know that you were close. 

“That’s it, doll,” he murmured. “I want to feel it. Show me that you’re fucking mine.” 

Body obeying his command, the orgasm took over, and you shattered around him at the exquisite pleasure that undulated from the place where you were joined out to everywhere from the top of your head to the tips of your curling toes. 

You never wanted it to end. Your body flooded not just with pleasure, but with a deep fulfillment that you had never felt before. It felt as if he was now a part of your psyche, as if he was the final puzzle piece clicking into place and making you whole. 

He was quick to follow, hips giving one more sharp thrust before they stilled and his lower body shuddered against you. He released a vehement moan into your mouth, his chest vibrating with the force of it. 

You clung to him, stunned by the intensity of the moment. His sweat-dampened forehead dropped to your shoulder, chests rising and falling against each other as you both tried to catch your breath. Eventually the muscles in your legs started protesting, so you unwound your thighs from his waist and dropped them back to the ground, causing your lower bodies to separate.  

After a few more seconds, he lifted his head and looked down at you. The tenderness and utter satisfaction on his face made your heart clench, and your mouth opened before you could stop it.

“Negan, I’m-” you broke off, brain finally catching up and trying to hold back the tide of emotion. 

His hand came up to cup the side of your face, golden gaze intent on yours. “What is it, doll?” 

Self-doubt suddenly rose within you, causing the words to stay caught in your throat, refusing to come out. What the hell are you thinking?! Don’t let the fact that he just gave you an amazing orgasm fool you into thinking he wants to get all sappy and emotional. 

Trying to fight any impending panic at the close call, you instead tried to play it off with a joke. “I think we might’ve broken our vow to be quick and quiet.” You attempted a sly grin, but it felt forced.

Furrowing his brows at your abrupt change in demeanor, his eyes moved carefully over your face, as if trying to find the truth behind the mask you had suddenly thrown on. Not wanting to wait and see if he’d call you out for the obvious deflection, you gathered the strength needed to push away from the tree...away from him. 

Tucking the shirt back down and bending to grab discarded jeans and panties off the ground, you silently got dressed with your back to him. The rustle of fabric and metallic clink of a belt buckle let you know that he was doing the same. When finished zipping up your boots, you picked up Ricardo from where he lay in the tall grass. A sudden surge of awkwardness hit when you ran out of actions to complete and so just stood there, unsure what to do next.

Much as you wanted to take off in a rush back to the Sanctuary, you had lost all sense of where you were. Knowing your luck, if you picked a random direction and started walking, it would be completely the wrong way. Instead, you stood there and waited, looking off into the distance through the trees, unwilling to make eye contact. It showed how well Negan could read you now, that he wordlessly and confidently started off in what must be the right direction, not trying to make you speak or look at him. It made you grateful to him that he understood and respected the need for some mental space, at the same time that it scrambled your emotions even more for him to be so in tune with you like that.

Starting off after him, it wasn’t long before he dropped back so that the two of you were walking side-by-side, Negan adjusting his long-legged stride to match your shorter one. Using his teeth to pull a glove off the hand that wasn’t clutching Lucille, he pocketed the leather and reached over to clasp your non-Ricardo hand in his bare one. 

You glanced down, taking in the sight of your smaller, more delicate hand wrapped up in his large, calloused one. His nonverbal offer of affection, despite the way you had shut down on him just minutes ago, made your chest tighten. Unable to continue the cold facade, you gave his hand a light squeeze of acknowledgement, unable to help the slight smile that tipped your lips when he returned it with a gentle squeeze of his own. Your brain and subconscious both let out the worried breaths they’d been holding with a sigh, as they watched you and Negan walk the entire way back to the Sanctuary like that: hand-in-hand.

~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~

[heresathreebee]

Garrote part 10

[Starz Power Diego Jimenez x Jazmine Mann (Black!OC)]

Word count: 3.1k words

Warning(s): Mature | Gun phobia, stalking. Diego and Healy get POVs in this one while Jazmine gets some R&R with the help from her mother. This is a plot only chapter, sorry. Previous Masterlist Next

Author’s Note: No beta reader and I’m far too exhausted to edit properly. After this story, I’m gonna adjust exactly how I format my fics. My million other fic ideas plus my debate over participating in NANOWRIMO this year have been keeping me from working on this too much, I figured it was time to put this up since the last chapter was posted in September... 

The rest of the day went by with a subtle ease. The temperature was just perfect for a coat and Diego seemed to have nowhere to be. Bordering on the miraculous, it was the man himself who asked her if she wanted to go out and have fun. Feeling caught off guard, Jazmine elected to throw caution to the wind and suggest something other than a fancy nightclub to hang out in. And when Diego heard the name, his jaw dropped. 

Two-Bit’s Retro Arcade. 

He did not ask why (though he did scoff, but more so in amusement than derision). Julio was elated to hear the address (apparently he’d been before), and Miguel looked crestfallen to have to stay at the penthouse. The journey from ritzy apartment to 25 cent arcade felt like being washed in time, stepping backwards into her past with a piece that didn't belong in that memory. 

The place was decently busy, there seemed to be no parties bigger than five. A collection of young kids took up the classics section, rotating between Dig Dug, Pac Man, and Tapper Light. The young man who played pinball every day was there. She didn't know his name but she knew his three letter handle because he had the highest score on every pinball machine in the arcade. The rest were small and easygoing groups, buying beers and gathering around prize winning claw games or Dance Dance Revolution. 

"Do they have air hockey?," Diego asked over her shoulder. He was dressed down per her request, in a simple hoodie and jeans. She kept glancing at him, feeling drawn to the simplicity of liking a simple man. 

"Over here." She had no intention of hiding how familiar she was with this place. Diego gave Julio a nod and the man dissolved into the background but was never out of sight. Suddenly, Jazmine became very aware that there were now at least two guns in this public space. Air hockey was... occupied. "Looks like a college tournament. Come on, we're not going to be able to play for like a week." 

She grabbed his arm to guide him away, but the man didn't budge. He stared those college boys down, looking for a fight. If he started something… 

"Diego. Diego! Please… it's just a game, I know a better one we won't have to share." 

At last he acquiesced and followed behind, never more than a foot away. She didn't realize she was holding her breath and wondered if those guys noticed his staring… they probably thought it was normal though. 

Jazmine brought Diego to the darkest corner of the arcade where nobody was or needed to pass by. If she stopped dead in her tracks, Diego would have tripped over her immediately for how close he was, but now that he had her exclusive attention, she didn't mind. She gestured to her favorite game and smiled. 

"Welcome to Marvel Vs Capcom: Clash of Superheroes," she announced. "Nobody plays this version because there's a huge glitch that sometimes makes one character untouchable." 

"OK." Diego wore a sly grin. No doubt he intended to find the cheat character and win all matches, but Jazmine knew all of this game's little secrets. 

Unsurprisingly, Diego's first pick was Wolverine. Jazmine refrained from rolling her eyes and let him work through the board of player characters, picking her own at random and sometimes picking the one she knew would fair better against his character to make it an even game. She watched his brow grow tighter and tighter as he couldn't find the broken character. He even switched up strategies– picking the characters that looked the least strong and working up from there (the opposite of his earlier choices). At last, he picked Chun-Li, having not noticed Jazmine picked it three times already, and he glanced at her face once more to see if she reacted, but the woman gave nothing away. Not until he looked towards the screen did she crack a smile. 

The way the smugness drained off of Diego's face made her smile broaden. He looked at the controls as if they were to blame, then to Jazmine and back to the screen where Chun Li had walked off of the edge of the screen. Annoyed, he leaned over the controls menacingly and waited for an explanation from the Cheshire cat grin on his partner's face. 

It took her awhile to answer him– she was trying really hard to fight the bubbling laughter in her belly. "Yeah, that um… that's what I was talking about. If you play the same character four times, the game breaks. You can't be hit but you also can't hit and you need to hold down the joystick to keep from walking off the edge of the screen… if you let them get away, well… you have to unplug the whole system." 

Diego looked pissed. He stared her down for so long she gulped but eventually, he freed her from his penetrative gaze. His hand slipped under her jacket and found a home at the base of her spine, and suddenly she was being whisked away towards the bathrooms. 

"Where are we–" 

Diego wasted not a breath and pushed her into the women's bathroom (unsurprisingly closet sized), before crowding her space to step inside and lock the door behind. Her heart began to pound against her chest as he turned and fixed her with a commanding glare. He moved as sly as a big cat, forcing her to find purchase against the tiny wood counter with the sink and leaning over her with his lips pressed to her nose. 

He said something softly in Spanish that she didn't understand, but it sounded sultry and it sent a pleasant shiver down her back. She thought he was going to kiss her, but then there was something hard and heavy he pressed into her hand. 

A gun. 

Her eyes bulged– glancing quickly between him and the shiny dark metal of the killing contraption– and shook her head minutely. 

"Take it," he said. She just kept shaking her head, hiding her hands beneath her arms and feeling dizzy, on the verge of passing out. He growled. "I wasn't asking." 

If he wasn't pressed against her, she would be rocking for comfort. Jazmine did not like guns. Her eyes misted over as she whispered, "why?" 

"They've been following us since we left." He slid the wretched mechanism up along her arm and let it rest just below her collarbone. "Haagen's men probably. They're getting bolder– probably by their master's orders." He tilted his head as if he was speaking of something completely mundane as he said, "did you really think those air hockey guys were college students? It's a Thursday." 

Jazmine didn't mean to whimper, but she managed to keep her tears at bay long enough to touch a finger to the gun, not quite taking it, but letting him know she would. She let him show her the safety and slipped it into the back of her pants, careful not to hurt her and demonstrating an awareness of her southpaw. He was almost hugging her when he finally stepped back (as far as the little toilet would allow). When his heel clinked against the porcelain, he turned to make sure he hadn't stepped in a mess, and Jazmine bolted. 

~

"Hello?" 

There was no one else's voice she wanted to hear more than that of Lashawn Mann. Jazmine felt guilt well up alongside the anxiety that had been threatening to consume her for weeks. 

"Mama?" Her voice sounded so small in her own ears. "Can I come over and see you?" 

"Of course, baby. You can come see me right now: I'm at your place." 

Jazmine caught a cab from Essex street home, and though Diego possessed an acute lack of awareness for personal space or feelings, he did leave her alone for a while. No SUVs with fake licenses trailed her home, no voicemails and no texts came through. She put it in airplane mode to make sure things stayed that way. She had a thought to drop Healy's hearing aid down a drain but put it in her pocket instead. 

Lashawn was waiting with Hercules. The tiny bit of annoyance Jazmine usually felt about getting slobbered on washed away the instant she saw her furry grey friend. The woman plopped her butt onto the ground and let the dog run amok in excitement to see her again. 

"Mom…" Hercules settled down in her lap and weighed her to the earth like an anchor for a ship at sea. "If something happens to me, will you take care of her?" 

"What do you mean 'if something happens to you'? Child, I ain't heard from you in two months and you come back with that?" Lashawn sat down on the floor despite her bad knees and leaned on her daughter's shoulder. "Baby, what's going on with you?" 

~

Estupido. She shouldn't have run away like that. 

Diego was overthinking in the backseat while Julio sat in perfect silence. The driver would have preferred the radio on, but his boss demanded the proper atmosphere to brood in. Taking what little he knew of the woman, Jazmine was probably going to retreat to her apartment since he lived in the only other place she was safe. Whatever– she would return in her own time. Unless her own time hindered their operation. 

We can't lose this opportunity. We are so close to Porsche and revenge. Hurry up, cariño. Make our next move. 

Diego was stuck deep inside his head even as he stood with his sister hours later in yet another huge warehouse with examples to be made of. Alicia wiped the blade of her knife onto her bodyguard's sleeve, then turned the blade over to her brother. 

"Finish the last one, will you?" 

Diego hummed, distracted by the conversation at the edge of the half circle. He did not like what he heard. He dug the blade straight into the crying man's heart, then cut his throat just for good measure. The blood on his hands was drying before he was able to speak again. He and Alicia were sat in her limo across from each other. She tactfully ignored his piercing gaze, while he worried the stickiness between his fingers mindlessly. 

"What's this I hear about you staying in New York?" 

Alicia glanced coolly up from inspecting her nails. "What do you mean? Someone needs to run the business." 

"That's what that idiot and your little fuck toy Dre are for. They deal with shit here while we get Porsche back, and then we go home. Together." 

"No," she shrugged. "Dre can't be trusted, Diego. I'm staying, you're going back to Mexico. We can split parent: the girl comes to live with me for a while and then with you. Every month or so…?" 

Diego's hands ball into fists and his teeth hurt from the pressure of keeping his jaw closed. Fucking puta, he thought as the car slowed to a stop. Exiting the car, the man pulled himself up to his full height and reveled in the brief moment of fear that registered on her face. 

"I'm not your errand boy, hermana. I don't do things because you think it's convenient. And I won't be sent away like an annoying pest so you can trounce about in luxury while I'm stuck doing peasant work. Am I the only one worried about that little fucking girl?" 

Through the marble stonework of her mask, he saw the cracks in her armor. "We can talk about this later, Diego." 

"Do you even want her back?," he sneered. 

"Stop it!" 

Alicia pushed him out of her way and disappeared quickly, her entourage scurrying to follow her. Diego looked to his men to find them with their eyes cast down as if they were witness to something they should never see. He stormed away with his head full of rage and more questions than answers. 

~

Meanwhile in a stuffy police office space, Healy was getting chewed out. His superiors figured him out, and now he was sat in interrogation with a furious pair of agents awaiting an explanation and disciplinary action. 

"You took it too far, Healy," his boss said. "I mean, you have really outdone yourself this time." 

"Yes sir." 

"Fucking A, right!" Agent Brasa slammed her hand on the table. No doubt she was chewing a huge wad of nicotine gum and gunning for his immediate firing. "This was our case, Healy, ours. Mine and Holbrooke, not yours!" 

Holbrooke remained ever brooding, silently leaning against the wall and watching the scene unfold. Though they made remained neutrally poised, he could tell by the pinch in their brow they were just as angry as Brasa. Healy had given up trying to talk to Brasa, and instead appealed to Holbrooke this time. 

"You two have every right to be angry with me–" 

"Oh do I??" Brasa cut in, "I didn't realize I needed your permission to be pissed off!" 

"-- but I did it because I had an 'in.' I saw an opportunity that only I could have seized, and–" 

"Are you really going to let him get away with this, Stahlworth?" Brasa looked accusingly at their boss, who merely scratched at his neck and closed his eyes as if keeping them open pained him greatly. 

"Brasa. Holbrooke. Out. I'll handle this the way I see fit– and don't argue with me, Marie, or I'll put you on suspension." 

The two stormed out into the hall, and finally Healy was able to breathe. As soon as he had been confronted by Stahlworth, he had come clean– setting up a covert op without agency permission and using a civilian to distract the perp while he slipped a mole into the organization and collected information. Brasa and Holbrooke had done amazing work– they discovered Haagen was the head, profiled the victims, and knew many of the locations of the exchanges– but they couldn't get any further to seizure warrants or when the exchanges were taking place. 

Healy looked pleadingly at Stahlworth. "They didn't have the resources to cover all those locations with proper 24 hour surveillance, Jack. Haagen is always one step ahead of them– of us– anyways because someone in this very organization is on his payroll. I don't need the glory, I don't want the case to myself– I just want this fucker behind bars. If you have to suspend me, I understand, if you have to fire me, I get it– but please don't throw out my evidence. People's lives are on the line, and Brasa and Holbrooke need this info–" 

"Who's your informant?" Healy snapped his mouth shut as the dreaded words left Stahlworth to hang menacingly in the air. "Healy? Who. Is your. Informant? Who are you working with? Give me a clearer picture of what you've been up to, and maybe I'll ask the DA to go easy on your ass." 

Healy gritted his teeth and dug his heels in. "I can't tell you any of that. A mole for a mole, I can't afford to trust that the eyes and ears in this very room are sound. Now if you want to pass this case back over to the agents it belongs to, I just have a few conditions concerning the safety of–" 

"Is this about Meghan?," Stahlworth asked. 

Healy's voice died in his throat. A lump formed and he had to swallow it down before it consumed him completely. Standing from his chair, Healy buttoned his coat and came face to face with his boss. 

"This is about the kids I can still save. Sir."

~

After LaShawn helped Jazmine pack her belongings, the daughter decided to take Hercules to the park for some fresh air. Her mother had made it clear she wanted Jazmine to move back in with her since she'd lost her job, but what she didn't know was that before Healy and Haagen, Jazmine was two months behind on rent, and she should have lost the lease to her apartment weeks ago. As it stood now, the landlord hadn’t bothered her once– so someone was paying her bills. Exactly who would remain a mystery as Diego, Healy, and Haagen possessed the means and the interest in keeping her in New York City, so she tried not to think too hard about it. 

Jazmine picked a spot in the grass and let Herc off the leash. She threw a beat up tennis ball with a little cheap plastic arm and watched her happy grey pupper zip around picnickers and other dog walkers, always stopping to be petted by every little girl and boy who squealed happily to see her. The woman was jumpy and constantly on edge, but for some reason she barely flinched when Diego sat down next to her. 

"I'll be honest, I'm glad you're here," she said without looking his way. 

He took the plastic arm and threw the next ball watching Hercules trot over hill and dale for this throw. "Did Healy tell you about Porsche?" 

Jazmine turned to see the dark bags under Diego's eyes. "He said something about a missing baby… is that what you mean?" 

The man leaned into her shoulder. "Yes." 

"I'm sorry, Diego." 

"I want my baby back, Jazmine. I want to watch her grow up happy and healthy and loved." He turns to look at her with an expression of maturity she didn't think he was capable of. "That's why I need you. We need you. You're probably scared, but you can't be more scared than that little girl is right now." 

It felt like a punch to the gut. Part of her was annoyed by his dismissal of her fear, but for the most part she understood. It wasn't hard to figure out what happened to older girls and boys in Haagen's ring, but what the fuck was he doing with babies? The thought twisted her stomach until her head ached from nausea. 

Diego continued, scratching at his eye to cover the build up of tears that threatened to spill out. "Healy said he found evidence of sales for kids under 13 that looked more like adoption papers than anything. Requirements for private education and a separate bedroom, things like that. He said he has a stack with no names but six of them are around her age with the name of the adoptive parents on it. It's a start." 

"It's a very good start." Jazmine placed her hand on Diego's back and let him curl into her side with a sigh. "It means she's still alive, that's fantastic... do you think Haagen noticed the papers were missing? He probably has so many…" 

Diego shrugged noncommittally and dragged her down to lay in the grass with Hercules. As he did, she felt the gun in her pants dig into her back, tightening that fist clenched around her heart. She was safe for now, in this moment. But would she ever be again?

@mental-bycatch @nicke0115 @1zashreena1 @girlpornparadise @kid-from-new-zealand​

[purplesurveys]

1036

survey by tickticktmr

How many...

How many times have you skipped class? I skipped one day a year back in high school, and that cut was always for this day-long event that the school would arrange to serve as a break from academic classes; for example, for those days we had like themed classes like knitting and it was also usually a themed costume day. I didn’t see the point in it, so I always skipped.

I cut a lot of classes in college that it’s impossible to count because, welp, it’s college lol.

How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? Hundreds.

How many years have you known your second closest friend? 10 years.

How many alarm clocks are in the house? We don’t have any alarm clocks, but we have alarms built into our phones. If those count, then we have five.

How many people have you argued with?  I don’t think I can count this. I’ve had arguments with various people ranging from mild bickering to full-blown fights.

How many times have you watched your favorite movie? I watched it every day for a certain period several years ago and I go back to it at least once every year. It’s probably been a little more than a hundred times.

How many people do you live with? Four, my parents and two siblings.

How many pairs of boots do you own? Zero.

How many people have told you they're in love with you? Just the one.

How many times have you cried over the opposite sex? A handful, but all have been in the non-romantic sense. I used to cry all the time when we’d drop my dad off at the airport, and I’ve cried over my grandpa’s and Nacho’s death as well.

How many people have been in your house at one time? Do you mean what’s the most number of people that’s stayed at our house at one given time? Not sure...maybe it was the time the entire executive board of my org came over for a meeting before the official start of the sem? It was only a little over 10 people, but then again my mom doesn’t appreciate too many visitors.

How many stuffed animals are in your room? There are a couple of plushies, but not anything bigger than that.

How many cellphones have you went through? Tons. I was my parents’ nightmare. I’ve gone through 8 so far.

How many pets do you have? We have two living ones, both dogs.

What would you do if...

What would you do if you could never listen to music again? I’d be really distraught over never being able to listen to my favorites anymore. Even if I don’t really listen to music when I’m depressed, i.e. now, I still like having the option to tune in when I feel like it. So even if it won’t be the end of the world, I’d still feel pretty damn lonely.

What would you do if your current bf/gf cheated on you? I don’t have one anymore but I’d be really puzzled and be betrayed if she had, given how much she hates cheaters and the act of cheating.

What would you do if you could never wear jeans again? Rejoice for the most part, but also be sad over mom jeans because they’re the only comfy kind of jeans and that’s the one type I genuinely enjoy wearing.

What would you do if your dad became president? Expect him to tap me for help almost immediately. I think he’d make a good leader considering he’s already one at his work, at least a far better one than my mom ever could be.

What would you do if you lost your most important possession? Right now that’s my laptop. If I lost that, I’d mostly be scared of the possibility of my parents whooping my ass; but at the same time my company just gave me a company laptop anyway so it’ll be easy to start over.

What would you do if your house burned down? Stop taking this survey, obviously. Then I’d grab my phone and Kimi, since he’s here with me in my room.

What would you do if your best friend didn't want to be friends anymore? I’d be devastated and start thinking if I’m the problem.

What would you do if you had to move do a different state/province? Thank fuck. I’d be relieved to have the chance to start from scratch, and I’d be all for it.

What would you do if someone shaved your head? Be furious, especially if they did it while I was asleep or otherwise unaware.

What would you do if Jesus came to your front door? Think that it’s probably an act and ask them to leave.

What would you do if your house was robbed? Check if my parents, sister, and dogs are unharmed.

What would you do if your sister/brother got married? Puzzled because 1) they are both single, 2) we are still in a pandemic and why would either of them want to get married right now, and 3) they are 20 and 17.

What would you do if dogs became extinct? Idk, be upset.

What would you do if the last person you kissed proposed to you? I’d be conflicted and a mix of emotions. I’m not sure I would take it well now, even if that’s all I wanted in the end.

Have you ever...

Have you ever broke a body part? I’ve mildly sprained an ankle, but I’ve never broken a bone or had an organ severely malfunction.

Have you ever broke someone else's body part? I don’t think so. 

Have you ever changed for a guy/girl? I’ve adjusted a lot. Idk about change.

Tried to jump on a celebrity but been stopped by the security guards? Kind of? Greyson Chance walked into the mall right when I was exiting and my first instinct as a 14/15 year old was to grab my phone and start taking photos, even though I wasn’t even a fan and could not name any song of his and was just excited to see a Hollywood person in such a mundane circumstance lol. But it wasn’t the smartest move, obviously. I got to be a little too close just because we were crossing paths; I wasn’t trying to be near him, but that’s what his bodyguard interpreted so he asked me to back off.

Have you ever complained about the last person you spoke to? I don’t think there was ever anything to complain about Hans. We’ve always been on amazing terms and he’s one of the funniest people I know.

Have you ever cried on your mom's shoulder? As an infant.

Have you ever dialed 911 as a prank? No. I’m not a jerk.

Have you ever won a talent show? I don’t have anything to show off, so I never joined those.

Have you ever spilled a drink on a expensive electronic item and ruined it? Nah. As clumsy as I can be, I’m always careful with liquids and gadgets.

Have you ever fainted when someone told you shocking news? Nope. I’ve only fainted because I was extremely hungry.

Have you ever swooned over the Jonas Brothers? In 4th grade. I still like them, but I haven’t swooned over them in a while.

Have you ever bought a piece of makeup that cost over $100? No, I don’t buy makeup period.

Have you ever been cheated on by someone who claimed to love you? I haven’t.

Have you ever got food free because the waiter thought you were hot? No, and ew.

Do you...

Do you have someone who will always be there for you? Yeah, I’m lucky I have friends who remind me all the time.

Do you have a membership at a gym? No, was never interested.

Do you act dumb to get guys/girls to like you? No. Hasn’t this been debunked a million times?

Do you know anyone who smokes a pack of cigarettes a day? Possibly more, yes.

Do you follow the rules? As much as possible, yeah.

Do you have a friend who secretly really annoys you? Eh, kind of, but I don’t count her as a friend per se.

Do you always have Pepsi at your house? I don’t think my parents buy Pepsi whenever they get softdrinks. I’ve only ever seen Coca-Cola bottles.

Do you flirt with anything that moves? No.

Do you watch Sponge Bob? I watched it regularly as a kid; as an adult, I’ll watch the older episodes from time to time.

Do you count sheep when you can't sleep? No.

Do you sweat easily? Nah. I’ve been told I rarely look like I sweat, actually.

Do you like pineapple? Not at all.

Do you refuse to wear something that's out of style? If it’s something that’s recently gone out of style, like culottes, then yeah. But if you mean like 90s stuff like fanny packs and mom jeans, I believe those things are back in style all over again.

Do you type 'u' or 'you'? I type both, depending on what I feel like using and who I’m talking to.

What is...

What is your best friend's name? Angela. Maybe Gabie? But mainly Angela.

What is your first girlfriend/boyfriend's name? See second name above.

What is your neighbour's name? I have no clue what any of their names are other than the director who lives two houses away; his name is Mac.

What is your least favorite swear word? Faggot.

What is the best and most romantic way to propose to someone? I think it will always be different per couple, and if a given couple wants a romantic proposal in the first place.

What is something that always makes you laugh? The show Friends.

What is the name of your hometown? That’ll stay a secret.

What is the most gentle way to turn someone down? Idk...haven’t really had to do this before, and the one time I did wasn’t the nicest way.

What is the ugliest girl name? 1) Can’t think of any, and 2) that’s just mean.

What is the most boring thing to do? Technically, waiting. Especially if it’s for something mundane, like lining up for a government service.

What is the funnest kind of question to answer? On surveys? I appreciate random questions the most.

What is the most useless thing you know? I’ve read a lot of ���useless’ trivia on Reddit that I’ll probably never have to use or bring up in this lifetime.

What is your favorite pair of pants? My mom jeans, which I always mention when asked this.

What is the best flavour of ice cream? I personally root for cookies and cream.

[coredrill]

alright, here are my thoughts on the unstoppable wasp novel! i’ve put the majority of my thoughts, and LOTS of spoilers, below the cut. short summary is that . . . i didn’t really like it at all :/

so, i’m gonna preface this by saying that i wanted to absolutely LOVE this book. it’s all about nadia and she is one of my all-time favorite characters and it’s so great that she got the spotlight in this way! i just really really wish i could, in good faith, say that the book was good, but i just can’t. and admittedly, i consider the unstoppable wasp comics to be nearly perfect, which is a high bar to hit, but there was just so much about this book that left a bad taste in my mouth.

first thing i want to mention is the role of the rest of the g.i.r.l.s. and when i say that, i mean that they had virtually no role. i genuinely wasn’t sure if i (the reader) was expected to have read the comics before the novel. on one hand, the first few chapters were spent pretty much summing up the comics, which is fine, especially because some readers may not have read the comics. on the other hand, if i hadn’t read the comics, there’s NO WAY i would’ve known anything about the other g.i.r.l.s!! they’re barely present in the plot of the book! they are present in one scene in the beginning, taina has a few lines throughout, and they’re more involved at the end, but a lot of the times they seemed more like wallpaper than actual characters. especially because of the frequency with which the author would throw in lines such as “that ethiopian place that shay likes” or “priya’s on-trend jeans” and just name-drop them without really giving them any substance. since i know the comics, i already know these characters--but if i was just reading the novel with no background? there’s no way i’d be able to keep them straight.

building off of what i said in that last point, i also wanted to mention that i listened to the women of marvel podcast interview with the author. something that i noticed is that she would always refer to the g.i.r.l.s as the “g.i.r.l. squad.” and that, i think, is the root of why i didn’t like how they were handled. it’s obviously pretty simple to explain their absence in the story by just noting that the whole point was that nadia was feeling alone and isolated from them. HOWEVER, in my opinion as a woman who has been in engineering . . . that doesn’t happen? nadia and the g.i.r.l.s are labmates--it’s right there in the title. they ARE the genius in action research labs. the “lab” isn’t just the location, it’s the people who make it up. by referring to them as “g.i.r.l. squad” instead of just “g.i.r.l.,” the author is changing the dynamics from “being a cohesive unit of girls who make up this incredible group and support each other in their science and goals” to “friend group who all happen to do science.” and as i mentioned, the random falling-out that happens in the book doesn’t happen to groups of the first type. being a girl in stem SUCKS. being in a stem class means that you’re automatically friends with the 1-2 other girls in there with you. and the people you work on projects with in a lab? the other girls who take the time to support you and have your back even though the odds are stacked against you? those are a whole different kind of friendships and i PROMISE they’re not wrecked by just forgetting to talk to each other. the girls that i worked with in college--the girls that i worked with now--it’s for survival. you don’t just fall apart like nadia apparently did from the g.i.r.l.s in this book.

okay. final bullet point on this topic. but in the women of marvel interview, the author said that she wanted to explore what could break apart the bonds that the g.i.r.l.s had formed. but on page 263, there’s the line “and if they had all just been a little better at communicating, maybe it wouldn’t have been so long before one of them realized that nadia was relying a little too closely on that little gold device.” so this deep dive into splitting the g.i.r.l.s apart, and barely giving shay, taina, ying, and priya a role in the story--was caused by MISCOMMUNICATION??? no freaking thanks LMAO. even without everything i’ve already mentioned, that trope is so lazy.

the writing style kinda bothered me at some points--i remember the discharge being described as “carbon dioxide” at one point, but like, just call it white foam. it’s so much easier and saying carbon dioxide pulled me out of what was happening. obviously this is a personal thing, not something objectively bad, but i still thought i’d mention it.

there seemed to be this point, around page 260, where it seems like the book flipped a switch. obviously, this is where the climax hit, but so many other things seemed to just randomly get pushed into place because the plot necessitated it? like, for example, nadia and the g.i.r.l.s are suddenly bffs again. even though, in nadia’s interior monologue, we’ve been hearing her resentment for them, it seemed like once the plot needed them to work together that they were able to do so without problem. and not only that, but it didn’t even feel earned? the book NEVER showed nadia and the g.i.r.l.s as actually like. being friends. (as i mentioned, not a choice i agree with, but still a fact.) so to have them all suddenly team up for the Big Boss Battle just felt weird and disengenuous to all of them. additionally, nadia went from defending margaret at all costs to suddenly thinking “oh yeah, she’s probably super evil. no big deal.” like WHAT??? the whole point of the first 250 pages was to show that nadia feels like margaret is the only person she can trust. all of a sudden she’s cool with her being evil??? make it make sense! you could see throughout the rest of the book that nadia was building up her Wrong Thoughts. sooooo much time was spent on it and we actually saw the development of how nadia felt. but to have her switch all that on a dime so that she can have her Right Thoughts now??? just in time for the Boss Battle? it just feels so unearned, since there’s nothing building to it. she just . . . changes her mind.

i also feel like writing a book where the protagonist, where the person whose perspective we’re following, is being MIND-CONTROLLED, but not revealing that mind control until the 11th hour (to validate the sudden switch from Wrong Thoughts to Right Thoughts) was just. a bit weird. i’m 22, but if i was reading this as a teenager, i’m not sure i would’ve quite gotten that the WHOLE BOOK was now being told by an unreliable narrator, with absolutely zero reliable information as a base (except the comics, of course).

ON PAGE 274. THERE IS ONE MENTION OF SHAY MAKING HER TELEPORTER PORTABLE. THIS IS AN INCREDIBLE FEAT OF SCIENCE AND SO GREAT FOR SHAY WHY WAS THIS NOT EXPANDED ON IN THE SLIGHTEST????

alright, time to talk about the nadia-being-ace thing. so, ever since i started reading unstoppable wasp, i’ve interpreted nadia as aroace. her version of friendships, her attempts to change the topic when romance for herself is brought up--these are all very authentically ace experiences. and that was okay for me to just have her coded that way! the writer of the comics, jeremy whitley, has included TWO (2!!!) ace characters in his raven pirate princess series so i definitely allowed myself to entertain the idea that the ace aspects of nadia were intentional. i was also okay with it not being explicitly mentioned in the comics--sure it would’ve been cool, but i understand that there are 18 issues TOTAL and it would be hard to fit the entirety of nadia’s story in there. BUT, when the author of this book mentioned that nadia was ace, and jeremy whitley confirmed that he’d been writing her as ace, it was awesome and super validating!! first of all, nadia being the first canonically ace marvel character--even just by word of god--is so freaking incredible and just adds to my enjoyment of the story. i’m very glad that we got confirmation and that i can continue reading the comics knowing, at the very least, that my ace reading of them is backed up by the canon (!!!!!). however, the author of this novel 100% used it as a marketing tactic which is super shitty. i was obviously going to read it anyway, since it was about nadia, but i do know people who bought it specifically because the author mentioned nadia being ace. and there was maybe one throwaway line in the novel about how nadia was only interested in romance ~theoretically.~ that’s not rep. in fact, it’s even less rep than the comics, which represented nadia being ace (at least in my opinion) far more authentically than this novel did. i’d honestly even go so far as to say it was riiiight up against the line of queerbaiting--yes nadia is canonically queer, but only by word of mouth, and it’s not mentioned even once in the story. that’s bad. using ace people for marketing--baiting them into buying your book on the promise of rep which we already have so little of--is so so shitty. yes, i am glad that we got that confirmation from jeremy whitley who never used this to promote the comics and didn’t even mention it until now, but i genuinely cannot believe that this author (who is bi! i checked her twitter!) effectively used it to market her awful book. honestly if the book weren’t bad enough already, to add this on top of it is even WORSE.

in the same vein, the author mentioned ying and shay being in a wlw relationship in the same interview where she mentioned nadia being ace. ying and shay are barely in the novel and EVEN WORSE, their relationship is kind of treated as an “obstacle” that nadia and the other g.i.r.l.s have to overcome in order to start working as a unit again. also bad!!!!!

okay. i think i’ve got this and one more bullet point, so we’ll see how it goes. but the way that the science in this book was handled was atrocious. sure, we had the cute science facts, but there is one (1) paragraph on page 311 about the g.i.r.l.s doing science for the sake of doing science and helping their community. IN THE WHOLE BOOK. you know a great way to demonstrate to women that they shouldn’t go into stem fields? write a cautionary book about the ~dangers of ai and data collection~ AS IF ANYONE LIVING IN THE WORLD RIGHT NOW DOESN’T KNOW THAT SHIT. jesus fucking christ. the comics showed all of this great science by the way of the g.i.r.l.s papers, shay making her teleporter at home, defusing the bomb in ying’s head, recreating the vision gloves, tai’s sports robots . . . this book had NONE of that. it literally just had the evils that we see in the news EVERY DAY. that’s not what you show people to get them excited, and i find it really fucking weird that ANYONE greenlit a book about characters who support and encourage women to go into stem fields with the overall message of “science bad!” like. how the fuck was this plot approved. in the women of marvel interview, the author claims that she’s written about women in science before--and i believe her. i just don’t think that she’s ever actually spoken to a woman in science.

and lastly, i have a huge issue with the role of hope in the book. by that, i mean that the novel is called “built on hope” but hope is literally never a theme throughout the book? so yet another instance of the book building off the comics without any form of payoff. the unstoppable wasp comics are kind, and loving, and hopeful. this book is callous and condescending and seems more concerned with its sassy one-liners about white dudes and ham-fisted pop culture references than LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE, including hope. nadia claims to love her friends but spends the majority of the book shitting on them. nadia lies to janet to “avoid hurting her” but the end of unstoppable wasp 10 showed the flip side of the situation where nadia and jan realize that although janet was hiding the truth about hank from nadia, nadia wanted to hear the information anyway!! and i just--WHY would you take a character who has been explicitly used in the past to introduce girls to women in stem (the interviews with real people in the back of the comics!) AND THEN WRITE HER INTO A FUCKING CAUTIONARY “TECHNOLOGY BAD” STORY??? it’s SO discordant with the comics and i genuinely hope that anyone reading this book goes and read the comics themselves, which are incredible and a bajillion times better than this book in all aspects. i’m finishing this “review” a lot more fired up then when i started typing it but i honestly can’t believe that marvel greenlit THIS and not like. 2 more comics.

so, yeah, those are my thoughts. kudos to anyone who actually made it through the whole thing (if anyone does), it’s egregiously long but i needed to put my thoughts somewhere! tldr: i will not be recommending this to my mom.

[tsukiakaeru]

Got Bored, so here is a Brief Explanation of Every Known Contractor’s Power and Price!

Be warned that there’s multiple things that can be a trigger, including purging, self harm, nudity, blood and gore, and others. There will be small spoilers as well. This is a bit of a long list, so sorry for that. Proceed at your own risk.

Abigail Croft: Can induce hallucinations into anyone around them, leaving them stuck and confused. In exchange, she must lick skin.

Alma: She can shape shift into any form she chooses. In exchange, she ages significantly faster, every time she shape shifts aging her forward by decades. As a result, she doesn’t get many uses before she dies of old age.

Amagiri: Can propel concussive blasts out of his hands. He must eat a boiled egg after.

Amber: Can control every aspect of time, even choosing to unfreeze certain people. She ages backwards significantly (goes from an adult to a preteen in three known uses) every time, getting younger every time until she essentially ceases to physically exist. As a result, she can only use her power so much.

Amitabh Kapoor: Can possess the body of any human. He must smell an old piece of clothing from his original body.

April: Can manipulate the pressure of air to create hurricanes and torrential downpour at will. She can control it well, surrounding people’s heads with water sometimes. She must drink an alcoholic beverage every time.

August 7: Can essentially do real magic tricks; what it seems like he’s doing is manipulating space around him to do various things that look like magic, or defy the laws of physics. He must reveal the secret to a magic trick every time he does.

Bai: Can control electricity; sometimes even on a quantum level, altering matter itself. This is Hei’s sister, and is technically part of Hei himself now, so Hei has the same power. She falls asleep every time she does.

Bertha: Can sing/vibrate her voice at any frequency. She has been shown to vibrate her voice to literally force a heart into cardiac arrest, similar to how one can vibrate their voice to glass to shatter it. Her price is to swallow something to then throw it up again. She prefers cigarettes for her price, due to an incident that happened with her daughter.

Black Dandelion: He can create black flowers, of which the seeds are poisonous; coming into contact with the seeds will give control to Black Dandelion. It also seems to give a random power to the person infected. His price is to be forgotten by others; eventually, he ends up forgetting himself.

Brita: She can teleport any human with her. Since she can only teleport humans, any clothes, weapons, or any other material objects are left behind. She must give someone a kiss every time.

Dale: He can turn himself into a mud-like liquid, and reform himself. Doing this, he can easily travel underground, but he can’t see above ground while underground. His price is unknown.

Dash: Can travel at superhuman speeds. His price is unknown

Genma Shizume: Can manipulate any material to make a suit of armor, or weapons for himself. He must perform a moxibustion treatment on himself every time.

Goran: Can also travel at superhuman speeds. His price is to eat hamburgers, much to his dismay.

Harvest: Can disintegrate anything. This includes humans, and regular objects. Must swallow something round as his price. The object has to be at least the size of a golf ball, or else it will not count. This means Harvest must not get something too small, lest he doesn’t pay his price, but not too large, or he will choke and die.

Havoc: Although she is a Regressor now (meaning she lost her powers and reverted to being human again), her former power was to be able to create vacuums in space. These vacuums can kill people and rips through concrete. Every time she does so, she must drink the blood of a child.

Hei: Like Bai, Hei can control electricity on a molecular level, but only through conductive surfaces. Since he gained this power by fusing with Bai, he has no price.

Ilya Sokoloff: He can asphyxiate the brain, preventing it from gaining oxygen, even if one is breathing. What results is that the victim slowly becomes tired as the brain ceases to function, dying without feeling any pain. His price is to draw. As a former serial killer, his drawings are often disturbing and graphic, showing dismemberments and a queasy artstyle.

Itzhak: He can retrieve the specters of Dolls (Dolls are a kind of human who can’t really control their bodies, and can be programmed. Dolls can move their senses anywhere using specters as long as the medium they use to transport their senses is present [Like Yin sewing and hearing wherever there’s water, or July wherever there’s glass]). His price is to write poetry, something he’d never done before becoming a Contractor.

Jean: Can teleport any material, as long that material switches out with the other material it’s going to teleport to. For example, if he were to teleport a slab of concrete to the place of someone’s heart, the slab of concrete would enter their body, and the heart would switch places with the slab. His price is to arrange small stones in a line pattern, then ruin it.

Louis: Can completely nullify gravity. However as he can only nullify it, he can’t move objects side to side. He must break his fingers as a price.

Luc: Can turn the air around him into a handheld weapons, specifically daggers, whips, and knives. He must crease the corner of every page in a book as payment.

Mai Kashiwagi: Has the power of pyrokinesis. She must hum a specific song every time.

Maki: He can remotely explode things he’s wherever his handprints are. He must drink something burning hot in temperature every time.

Mao: Can posssess any animal, as long as it’s in his line of sight. He has no price, as it’s already paid. His price from when he was human is also unknown.

Michiru: She can control any body of water, as long as she’s stepping in it. Her price is to cook. She prefers baking.

Mina Hazuki: Can energize anything into an energy based weapon similar to a lightsaber; this can be used on herself to teleport. Every time she does, she must passionately make out with a man. This price particularly sucks, because Mina is actually adamantly gay, sometimes making innuendos to girls she thinks is cute but just met.

Musik: Can steal the power of other Contractors. Unknown price.

Nick Hillman: Has electrokinesis. His price is to put the victim’s shoes upside down, next to each other.

November 11: Can freeze any liquid around him. He can also make lethal throwing icicles out of them. He must smoke a cigarette every time, even though he abhors them.

Parcel: Can create black orbs. Whatever is in the black orb, regardless of the item, she can teleport to any location. Her price to wear fake animal ears, or else she’s not allowed to use her power in the first place. As a result, she can usually be seen wearing a bear hoodie.

Paul: Can make any object explode. He must eat a flower every time.

Shihiko Kishida: Can rupture any human internal organ, even multiple at the same time. She regains her morality and feels severe guilt every time as a price.

Shion Pavlichenko: Can duplicate anything, including humans, almost perfectly. However, there always will be one major difference. Every time he does, his legs stop working. As a result, he’s usually in a wheelchair.

Shizuma Shinoh: Has the power of hydrokinesis. He must make himself vomit every time.

Suou Pavlichenko: Her power is to summon the PTRD-41 anti tank sniper rifle with six rounds [including one in the chamber], but has to make origami swans every time she does so. The rifle retains the damage from past uses, so it needs constant maintenance.

Tanya Akulova: She can control insects. She can call them in massive hordes, enough to quickly devour a human alive. Every time she does, she must pull out strands of her own hair. The amount she must pull is proportionate to the amount of insects she summons.

Top-rope: He can manipulate a rope he carries with him, with lethal results. His price is unknown.

Wei Zhujin: He can transport any sort of matter as long as it’s something his own blood is touching. Coincidentally, and almost conveniently, his price is to cut to himself. More specifically, to shed his own blood.

Xi-Qi: He can control the minds of others. He can also create hallucinations of any kind. He must eat a flower petal every time.

Xiao Jie: She has full control over gravity. Unlike Louis, she can do more than just nullify it. Her price is to essentially strip; she must take off only one piece of clothing when she does. This isn’t to say she’s usually naked like Brita; accessories like bracelets, earrings, and necklaces do count.

And that’s every known Contractor in DtB! I didn’t think anyone would make it this far, so congrats! Thanks for reading!

[greywindys]

It’s that time of year again! I, and possibly a good number of you reading this, just spent the whole of 2018 in the Gorillaz fandom. Congratulations! You made it! Because this year...kinda sucked. Not just for the Gorillaz fandom but, if this Washington Post article is any indication, for the rest of the world too. Maybe on an individual level there were moments of light. Maybe Gorillaz was your moment of light. If it was I’m genuinely happy because that means you probably found a way to avoid or ignore all the chaos that went down this year. But overall? Fandom was rife with disappointments, confusion and conflict with some good parts (for me, at least) sprinkled in here and there. Below is a personal reflection on the top 10 significant events in fandom of 2018.

1. Murdoc Goes to Prison

2018 started out peacefully for fandom. We were just finishing up sharing our scans of G-Magazine and theorizing over the next album when we’re treated with this - a nineteen second mocap of a frantic Murdoc accepting a Brit Award with an “oh by the way I’m going to prison.” We didn’t know why or for how long, and, though fans were confused and Murdoc going to prison is a tired, overplayed storyline at this point, it was cherished as any new Gorillaz content, especially animation, is cherished. Memes were made, most notably the #FreeMurdoc hashtag complete with a petition which was acknowledged by creators and caused the first big outburst in fandom for its messy tag. I did what I always do with Murdoc videos and went through the entire thing frame by frame to collect screenshots. Little did I know that this would be the only time I would get to indulge in this beloved past time. Little did I know that I would be wearing the same expression as Murdoc is in this screencap this entire phase.

2. Murdoc hate

Murdoc hate has always existed. It’s also generally accepted. However, when it was confirmed that Murdoc was going to be in prison for an undetermined amount of time and that he may not even speak this phase (thanks a lot, phase 5 plot!) it reached unprecedented levels of viciousness. Some fans took every opportunity to drag him in the main tag, start debates with anyone who might mention one positive thing about him and expressed how they genuinely wanted him to die and/or never come back. It kinda reminded me of this season of MTV’s The Challenge when everyone ganged up on Johnny Bananas. Like, yes he’s an asshole and yes this was probably long overdue but also omg when is there and end point? Is there an end point? It was like some people hated Murdoc more than they liked Gorillaz. For some additional context - this tense environment was born out of an astoundingly severe conflict that happened in spring where three separate fandom storms that had been brewing since late 2017 collided into one huge mess. Discords were raided, friendships were lost, the police were called (I’m not even exaggerating). I won’t go into it more but if you were there, you know what i’m talking about. Murdoc wasn’t the cause of this, but his character was at the center of one of those storms and the canon sending him to prison only reignited the ire towards him. For awhile Murdoc fans weren’t sure were exactly they stood with the greater fandom, and new fans were confused as to why this one green character was the source of so much grief for haters and fans alike. This continued for most of the year (and still continues today), hence why it’s getting a mention now.

3. Ace

Believe it or not Murdoc and Ace are confirmed #friends. You wouldn’t know that from all the Murdoc vs Ace content that sprung out of this year but Ace was the one who joined Murdoc for hot chocolate after he got out of prison, “they go way back” etc etc. Ace was a big deal because it was probably the only time the fandom guessed something correctly this entire year. Jamie began posting cryptic pictures of Noodle with this unidentified man, then another with only the Ace card visible. “It a Powerpuff Girls crossover!” Some people claimed. But that seemed so random? Really? A B-list cartoon villain from a cartoon targeting an entirely different demographic? More likely than you think! Ace never spoke a word and he wasn’t allowed to smoke or have sex. People obsessed over him anyways. To this day I still have no idea who he is or what kind of personality he has or really anything. But he wasn’t a bad guy (more on that later) and he was Murdoc’s friend so he’s alright with me.

4. Messaging Denholm

By now the fandom was fraught with distress on so many levels. We were lost. We needed someone to guide us, to show us the way, to show us the #truth. I don’t know exactly who started this trend but it soon spread around Reddit and other social media sites that Jamie’s son Denholm was replying to dm’s on Instagram and soon, he was graced with a deluge of of inquiries from casual fans and Murdoc stans alike. The thing is though - he actually *did* answer them. Many of us had spoilers re: Murdoc and Ace’s friendship, Murdoc getting out of prison, etc. MONTHS before they happened. I believe he even told us that 2D was fine back in like, June or something. Denholm knew! Eventually we pissed him off but it didn’t stop him from answering. He just answered angrier. It also caused fans to argue more because people started accusing others of photoshopping his responses and nothing can ever be done peacefully here. I haven’t followed up on this story singe the end of summer but I think fans have finally scaled back on the messaging. But I hear he’s working on a Gorillaz documentary for 2019 so...I’m sure we’ll be talking again soon.

5. Noodle

I want to take a moment here to also acknowledge the struggle AMA Gorillaz hosted on, of all places, Youtube. Thankfully, diligent redditors compiled a google doc of all the answers otherwise they would lost thanks to Youtube’s confusing interface. ANYHOW. The answer that stirred up the biggest milieu of debate and confusion came from Noodle. This isn’t exactly my lane - I don’t wade into Noodle issues and I don’t id as part of the LGBT community - so I’m not going to say much here other than, at the very least, this was the second or third time she has officially denied any interest in dating her bandmates.

6. 2D’s journal/2Doc

Okay first of all: 2DOC...jk, jk...jk? But no, honestly, this actually did become a big story this year, much bigger than expected. The release of 2D’s journal was the catalyst here, revealing a number of drawings and images of Murdoc. “Souk Eye,” a song that came with visuals featuring close ups of Murdoc’s face and vaguely romantic lyrics was depicted in 2D’s journal next to yet another drawing of Murdoc. We were confused! 2D didn’t care that Murdoc was gone, right? 2Doc shippers were intrigued. I was hesitant. We were all called delusional. However, “Souk Eye” was later confirmed to be a love song by Damon Albarn, and Murdoc and 2D have both claimed their relationship is “better” since the end of phase 5 (hhMmMmM). Obvi, take this with a grain of salt because it’s Gorillaz but the journal was instrumental in confirming how closely The Now Now (and the entire plot of phase 5, really) was tied to Murdoc and 2D’s relationship, particularly what 2D thinks of Murdoc. Think of it as platonic if you want but they share a closeness on SOME level and the content of 2018, from interviews to the Murdoc chats to the album itself, supports this. I rest my case.

7. Lost theories

Pour one out for all the lost theories. If you were a new fan this year you probably came up with a theory, or you got really invested in a theory. Some examples: HIM from PPG orchestrating the destruction of Gorillaz by possessing 2D and getting Murdoc framed with Ace as a double agent, or Murdoc’s imprisonment being tied to his trouble with EMI from phase 4, or phase 5 being about time travel, or Murdoc crashing Demon Dayz fest and fighting El Mierda on stage, or 2D being the one to frame Murdoc or Murdoc’s inmate number (24602) being a Les Mis reference implying that he’d get a character arc similar to Jean Valjean...you get the idea. But there are dreams that cannot beeee, and there are storms we cannot weather. You can argue about the budget or G-Shock or whatever but the truth is Gorillaz is just disorganized. This is their Brand™.

8. The Murdoc Chatbot

Gorillaz did an interesting thing this year - it let us talk to Murdoc! Sometime around June, he writers decided that the plot of phase 5 would be best spent, not on exploring the band’s dynamic with Murdoc gone or developing Ace’s personality, but on Murdoc! Fandom spent most of the summer following Murdoc’s experience in prison and helping to “free” him via a chatbot you could access through Kik, Instagram or Facebook. Basically, Murdoc was Paddington from Paddington 2, and we the fans were supposed to be the Browns trying to break him out and prove his innocence. Other fans begrudgingly used the chatbot to make fun of him or tell him to die and follow along with the story (it was the only place you could get plot updates). It was a neat idea as well as a funny experience to pretend to be talking to him, and the plot was very engaging at times. It was the chatbot that revealed the very dissatisfying (albeit happy) conclusion that Murdoc is no Paddington and had lied about everything - being framed, El Mierda etc. - but felt really bad about it. His apology was basically this. I’m going to also tag the #FreeMurdoc merchandise debacle, how overpriced it was and how it ended up being pointless anyways because Murdoc wasn’t framed and didn’t need to be “freed” onto this, because it all falls under the same event. Oh, and you got to talk to Noodle sometimes, too. 

9. G-shock ends phase 5

I put “ends phase 5″ in strikethrough because G-Shock on its own is actually pretty cool, and made up for the lack of videos (2 in total) that were released this year. The now Murdoc inclusive band goes to space and starts an alien war! That’s fun! Completely removed from whatever phase 5 was, but fun! (And I say that genuinely) What was messy about G-shock was that it came out of nowhere. The final Murdoc chat, that was SUPPOSED to reveal the ending to the prison arc, hadn’t even happened but suddenly, Murdoc was back to sell watches to aliens with the rest of the band and Ace was gone. But the final chat was delayed by a month and G-Shock came out anyways. Out of this came memes about how phase 5 ended so Gorillaz could try to sell us watches.

10. Cass Browne Tells us the True Plastic Beach Ending

We ended 2018 with not one but two major interviews from the fancast, Hallelujah Monkeyz but I’m choosing to cover their latest interview with Cass Browne, writer of Rise of the Ogre. If you were new this year you probably heard older fans mention ad nauseam how much they missed this guy name Cass. Well, Cass came back and dropped actual bombs about the true ending of phase 3, Murdoc’s lost backstory and the Plastic Beach book he found AND that a sequel to ROTO was planned and dropped. Understandably, this sparked a lot of discussion and also revealed just how important Cass was to the continuity of the Gorillaz storyline. Back then, we had ROTO and Plastic Beach. Today, we have “Murdoc drowns in poop and reunites with the band offscreen”

And that’s the year! And look I’m not saying this because I’m a stan but this was a Murdoc year. He was at the center of like, at least 80% of the angst and joy of fandom and I could make separate “top 10 Murdoc moments” or  “top 10 2Doc moments.” I guess for me, on an individual level, it was an alright year. For one, I actually talked to more people this year and met some really great friends (something I don’t typically do in fandom). I also get to check “write a fanfic” off my bucket list (it’s still a WIP but it’s the first WIP I’ve ever had so I’m counting it). And personally, my life has changed and without getting into too many details I’ve overcome a lot, grown professionally and...I think I can be kinda proud of myself for that. I expect 2019 to be a slower year than this one, and, I think the fandom needs that. Hopefully I’ll still see some of you around because I’m going to be here for at least the next few months while I finish up you know what. 

Honorable mentions: 2D “Dies” of Ligma and other 2D memes, 2D writes The Now Now, Benjamin Clementine says he regrets working with Gorillaz, Noodles old VA confirms Jamie ghosted her and recast Noodle without telling her, Gorillaz delay the final Murdoc chat by a month, Demon Dayz doesn’t get streamed, Music video releases - “Humilty” and “Tranz”, Cyborg Noodle returns with boobs and causes debate, the “Let Ace Speak” petition,

[today-only-happens-once]

Break

Title: Break

Summary: Logan, a high school science teacher, gets a text from his high school-counselor husband on his day off. Active shooter. I love you so much, Logan. Human AU. Logicality, Familial LAMP.

Warnings: Active shooter situation observed from the outside, death mention, angst, crying, cursing, violence.

A/N:  Because I’m tired and angry and scared. They say write what scares you? Here you go. I needed to put my thoughts and emotions somewhere, and this is what happened. Don’t feel obligated to read it, please. I know many of you are probably exhausted from this subject matter, and that’s more than okay. But I sat down to write it and I got emotional over the subject matter while writing and it’s almost 3k words so just…. I thought maybe it’d be worth putting up on here? I dunno.

I wrote this all in one sitting... It’s mostly a vent fic, if I’m going to be very honest with you all. Just... sorry, I guess.... 

Tags: @helloisthisusernametaken, @ren-allen, @lizaelsparrow, @princelogical, @random-pianist, @erlenmeyertrash, @milomeepit, @at-least-seven-pretty-potatoes, @rileyfirstname, @pinkeasteregg, @sassy-in-glasses, @vigilantvirgil, @generalfandomfabulousness, @lacrimosathedark, @monikastec, @heir-of-the-founders, @yourworstnightmare999, @artistictaurean, @kanejandkruge, @cdragontogacotar, @candiukas, @damienswifeolicitydallysgirl

Logan is standing in the kitchen when he gets the text.

His phone buzzes on the corner of the table and he sees the ID as Patton’s name. He sets the mug of coffee down on the countertop beside him with a quiet click as he reaches for the phone.

It wasn’t entirely unusual that his husband would text him randomly throughout the day. The contents of such texts varied: sometimes they were reminders about eating and sleeping, sometimes they were quick affirmations, sometimes they were dog pictures or random science jokes that Patton thought Logan would appreciate. And he always did, the corner of his lips curling in a smile when he’d quickly check his phone between classes. Every once in a while, Patton would send him an “I miss you” and Logan would affectionately roll his eyes and reply, “you realize my classroom is right down the hall from your office?”

Logan, however, had taken the day off. He had been at a conference for K-12 STEM educators and had got the red-eye flight back. He hated not being in school, but he couldn’t stress the importance of physical and mental health to his students and not lead by example. Besides, he had never taken a day off before in his life until now.

Logan quickly swipes in the code to open the phone and pulls up messages. He stares at the message even as his stomach drops.

P: Active shooter. I love you so much, Logan.

Logan’s jaw jumps before he types out a reply. Stay calm. RHF. He pauses and swallows hard. I love you too.

He grabs his keys and tears out of the house so fast he almost forgets to put on shoes.

…

He speeds the entire way. He very nearly runs a red light, slamming hard on the brakes at the last second. His hands are wrapped around the steering wheel in a white-knuckled grip. The radio is turned to the news. He can’t bear to listen to it. He can’t bear not to.

Why did he have to have taken today, of all damn days, off?

Logan can’t help the tightness in his stomach. The faint feeling that he might throw up. That same feeling making him slam a hand against the steering wheel. He checks his phone. Nothing.

The light turns green.

Logan’s fingers twitch as he hits the gas again. He thinks of Virgil—his son, in his junior year at the high school. He wonders if he should text him. A second later, Logan shakes his head quickly. Texting him could put him in danger. The alert, if not silenced, could give away his location. Did Virgil make it out? Did Patton?

Why had none of them texted him yet? Logan glances at the clock on the dashboard. He had received Patton’s initial text three minutes ago.

Had it only been three minutes?

Logan drives in a distant haze. He parks on a street in the neighborhood surrounding the school. He’s barely slammed the gear shift into park and yanked his keys out of the ignition before he’s out of the car and running towards the school. He can see police cars lining the streets, areas roped off.

“Mr. Sanders!” The sound of his name grabs his attention. Logan stumbles to a halt, looking around for the source of it.

He sees her a second later. Valerie. Senior. She was in your AP Chemistry class last year, Logan reminds himself. She had always been one of the sweetest, smartest, and hardest working kids he’d ever had the pleasure of working with. She’s sprinting towards him, her cheeks streaked with dark mascara. Her eyes are wide in terror, red from tears. Logan catches her by the arms as she sags with a sob.

“Valerie,” Logan says. “Valerie, look at me.”

She hiccups and blinks hard. Logan can feel her shaking. “Mr. Sanders,” she says, taking in a few breaths. Logan can feel his heart in his throat. “Have you seen my mom? I need—I...”

Logan takes in a breath of his own, closing his eyes for just a moment. Pull it together, he tells himself. These kids need you. He doesn’t know if Virgil has made it out of the school yet. He doesn’t know about Patton. But he cant stand here and do nothing but worry. Not when these kids—these children—need him.

“I haven’t seen her,” Logan answers her. “Did you call her?”

Valerie nods. “Y-yeah. I—yeah.”

Suddenly, a soft feminine voice interrupts them from behind. “Valerie?”

Logan hears Valerie gasp. “Mom?”

The teacher releases a faint breath and lets go of the girl in front of him. “Oh, mi amor, I’m so happy you’re safe,” her mother says through tears, wrapping her daughter up in her arms. She locks eyes with Logan for a brief moment. Thank you, she mouths. Logan can’t manage a smile, even a polite one, but he nods.

Part of the job, he thinks, and realizes with a faintly nauseous feeling in his stomach how messed up it was that it was true.

“Valerie,” Logan says, his voice tight, “did… did you, by any chance, see Virgil? Or my husband?”

Valerie shakes her head, brushing at her eyes again. “I’m so sorry, Mr. Sanders. I just… I just ran. I don’t remember seeing either of them.”

Logan swallows thickly but waves a hand. “Don’t apologize. Please. Your safety should absolutely have been your number one concern. You did the right thing.”

“I’m sure they’re okay, though,” Valerie says as Logan starts to walk away.

Perhaps it is rude of him, but Logan keeps walking. Every part of him wants to believe her with a desperation that scares him. Logan feels his eyes burn and he picks up his pace as he walks closer to the school.

He checks his phone. Nothing.

…

The police stop him before he gets much closer. Logan wants to yell at them. He doesn’t. They’re just doing their job, he reminds himself.

It’s just… his entire life is inside that building.

He thinks of Patton’s bright smile through the video camera the night before when they’d FaceTimed while Logan was in the airport. He thinks of the warm giggle he’d let out when he’d made an airplane pun and Logan had groaned and bit back a smile. He thinks about how Patton had made him biscuits and bought a new jar of Crofters for when he returned from his red-eye with a small note reminding him to sleep today.

Logan twists his wedding band around his finger and wonders if he’ll ever sleep again.

He thinks about Virgil, too. How much better their house and family was once they’d adopted him. Virgil meant the world to him. He thought about Virgil’s witty, snarky quips. He thought of that faint smile he’d let out once in a while that showed he felt loved and safe and accepted. He thinks about all the times he’d helped Virgil through a panic attack. Virgil was the bravest, most wonderful kid Logan had ever met. Adopting him had been the best decision of his life.

Losing either one of them would be to lose everything.

“Logan?”

The voice startles him out of his thoughts. Logan stops twisting his ring around his finger and tears his gaze away from the swarm of police cars in the distance to look at the man beside him. A colleague, this time.

“Emile.” Dr. Picani. Another school counselor alongside his husband. Logan’s left thumb brushes the smooth metal of his ring again, fighting down the rising hope. “I’m glad to see you’re safe.”

The counselor’s eyes—usually warm and sympathetic—have something else behind them. Something darker. Guilt, maybe, and a bit of anger as well. Logan isn’t sure. Patton’s the better one at identifying emotions. “Wish I could say the same. Unfortunately, I can’t honestly say that I’m glad about much of anything right now.”

Logan shoves his hands into the pockets of his dark jeans. He understood all too well. He swallows. “I hate to ask this, Emile, but you didn’t… my husband…?” Logan hates how he can’t get the words to form.

Something softens in Picani’s expression. “I’m afraid I don’t know,” he says. “I was walking through the hallway when the first gunshot went off. Patton was already in his office. I think he was working with someone.”

Logan presses his lips together in a thin line. He doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t trust himself to speak. He feels Emile squeeze his shoulder before he steps away.

Logan checks his phone. Nothing.

…

Logan doesn’t know how long it lasts. He wanders through the streets, running into students and faculty alike. None of them had seen Patton or Virgil. He checks Twitter for news updates.

It won’t be reliable information, he tells himself, and he knows that but at least it’s something. At least it’s something.

He helps a student (Andrew Reinfeild, Logan remembers him from CP2 Chemistry last year) find his brother in the growing crowd, swallowing the lump in his throat at the desperation of their embrace. A student—Brayden Chase, a senior that Logan was convinced hated him for getting an F last year in his Astronomy class—sobbed against his chest until his girlfriend found him. Another student (Harmony Gibbins, Logan reminds himself, an incredibly bright freshman that was on the robotics team) stared numbly at the school until Logan approached her and said her name, told her that she was safe now. She burst into tears.

Logan waits with her until her friend appears and then he quietly dissolves back into the crowd. He keeps looking for son. He keeps looking for his husband. He feels like he’s moving in slow-motion.

He’s never felt so damn helpless in his life.

He listens to the murmurs and rumors in the crowd. One person says they heard four gunshots. Another says seven. A girl sobs that she heard there were casualties. The local news tweets out that there have been no confirmed deaths.

A student still in the building tweets a love note to her dad and her baby sister.

Logan checks his phone. Nothing.

…

“Suspect is in custody,” the police officer is saying with a bullhorn to the crowd that had been collecting in the streets of the neighborhood, far enough away that they could barely see the school. “I repeat, we have the shooter in custody. We are evacuating the rest of the building right now. Please be patient and calm—“

Logan is stiff and tense. He feels a bitter taste flood his mouth at the words.

“—as we continue to investigate.”

Someone shouts over the crowd as the officer starts to lower the bullhorn. “How many people died?”

The crowd falls silent. Logan watches, his gaze narrowed, as the officer hesitates and glances around the crowd. Finally, he turns the bullhorn back on and says quickly, “We are still evacuating the building.”

Logan pales. He can hear what the officer isn’t saying. People had died. Patton. Virgil.

“Mr. Sanders?”

Logan whirls around at the familiar voice. He stops short at the kid in front of him. “Roman.”

Roman Prince. A junior, and rising theatre star. Also Virgil’s best friend since freshman year. Logan practically considered him to be another son (only spurred further by the fact that he knew Roman’s parents were frequently absent from his life). Professionalism be damned, Logan says to himself. He shouldn’t, and it’s not like him, but his nerves are frayed. So he grabs Roman and pulls him in. The teen doesn’t need much encouragement before he’s hugging Logan back fiercely.

A moment later, Logan can feel his shirt by his shoulder getting damp and he realizes Roman is shaking like a leaf. The science teacher just runs a hand up and down his back slowly a few times. He doesn’t know what to say. In the corner of his eye, he sees a news camera pointed at the interaction and a part of him wants to march over and break it in half.

Roman pulls back and Logan relaxes his grip. The teen sniffles and wipes quickly at his eyes. “Have you heard from Virge?” he asks hopefully, and Logan’s heart somehow sinks even further. He’d been about to ask the same question.

Quietly, Logan shakes his head. “I’m afraid not.” And he is. He is so afraid.

“What about Mister Mr. Sanders?” Roman asks, the rawness in his voice overshadowing the lame attempt at humor. Roman had always referred to Patton as “Mister Mr. Sanders”. Usually, it made Logan smirk.

But all he can think about is Patton’s bright laugh when he’d hear Roman call him that the first time. Virgil’s eye roll and quiet snort of amusement. Wordlessly, Logan shakes his head again.

Roman frowns. “Mr. Sanders, you don’t look so good. Maybe you should sit down.”

“I’m fine,” he says hollowly.

“Pardon the language, but that’s bullshit,” Roman says. “Nothing is fine. Least of all us.”

The teacher doesn’t argue with that.

Logan checks his phone. Nothing.

…

The minutes—the hours? Logan can’t keep track—tick by. Logan does, eventually, sit down on the grass. He puts his head in his hands. Roman sits beside him and, for perhaps the first time since Logan met him three years ago, is silent.

At some point, the officer announces that they’ve cleared the building. He sends a text to both Patton and Virgil the second he says it. Where are you?

The death count is somewhere in the double-digits. Logan only half-listens. Every time the screen on his phone dims out, he presses the button to light it up again. After a while, Roman quietly takes his phone and makes an adjustment in settings so that it won’t go to sleep. The teen’s own phone sits in front of him. Every time it lights up with a message, Logan glances at the ID to see if it might be Virgil.

It never is.

People around him are sobbing. Others are silent.

Logan can’t feel anything except an overwhelming, aching emptiness. The crowd grows thinner as parents arrive to take their shaken, terrified children home. Every reunion twists a sharp, hot pain in Logan’s chest as he thinks of Virgil.

“C’mon you two,” says a voice behind him. Logan lifts his head out of his hands. It’s Dr. Picani. “Let me drive ya home.”

“You don’t have to do that, Emile,” Logan says, his voice distant. “I can take Roman home.”

“Nonsense,” Emile replies firmly. “I’m not letting you drive in the state you’re in, Logan.”

Logan doesn’t have it in him to argue. He doesn’t have it in him to do anything. Numbly, he nods and stands up, motioning for Roman to do the same.

“Hey,” Dr. Picani says softly to him after a moment. “Don’t give up hope. They evacuated people in all directions. And they might’ve gotten out earlier. They’ll call.”

Logan checks his phone. Nothing.

…

The ride is silent. Roman mutters an empty thanks when he’s dropped off. Logan snaps out of his haze long enough to make Roman promise that if he needs someone, he’ll reach out. You have my number, Logan reminds him. Roman just nods and slams the door closed.

When they get to Logan’s house, the high school science teacher stares at the drive way. His eyes burn. Part of him feels, not for the first time today, like he might be sick. Because there in the drive way is Patton’s car. Logan blinks hard a few times, and he expects it to disappear. His mind is playing tricks on him.

But the car stays there in the driveway. Logan’s hands are shaking. Dr. Picani gives a soft, relieved smile. “Well look at that.”

Logan is still staring at it.

Emile chuckles. “Logan, you can gape at the car all you want but you should probably go inside. I have a feeling there’s someone there who wants to see you.”

His edges of his vision blur and he blinks again, shaking his head. “Y-yes. Yes, of course.”

He fumbles with the seat belt and practically falls out of the car. He breaks into a run for the front door, trying the handle and cursing under his breath when he finds it locked. Logan pats his pockets for his keys, digging them out of his front left pocket. He drops them in the process and curses again.

When he finally gets the door open, he calls out tentatively. “Patton?”

The first person he sees isn’t Patton. A young, familiar face stands in the entryway to the kitchen in that signature black and purple hoodie. The hood is pulled up over his long bangs but his eyes are wide and familiar beneath them. A second later, a flop of brown hair, thick black glasses, and a bright blue polo appears behind him.

“Dad?” Virgil asks at the same time Patton says, “Logan, honey…” 

Logan breaks.

…

[lycorogue]

Who Wants to Meet My OCs? (Part 3a – Glitches Originals)

Look at me, following my plan and actually having the next part of this series posted on a Sunday! Whoot!

As I have mentioned before, I've wanted to do this series since November, so I'm excited I'm able to actually follow through with it finally. If you're just getting into this series, the long-and-short of it is that I want to introduce you fine people with all of my main OCs. They will each get their own Sunday bio post to introduce them individually, but in the meantime, I wanted to give insight on how I came up with them.

In Part 1, I had given a broad overview of the whole Meet My OCs series, as well as some generic IRL background to the inspiration and creation of my two main worlds:

Gyateara

Glitches

In Part 2, I talked specifically about the IRL inspiration for my main Gyateara OCs:

Amara Yori 

Natalie [Last Name TBD] 

Connor [Last Name TBD] 

Jolene Crisslebalm

Now, in this third part for the series, it's time to talk about my IRL inspiration and creation for my Glitches OCs. This list of characters is MUCH longer than what I have for Gyateara, so this may take a bit. In fact, there were so many characters - this post was 9 pages in Word - I had to split up this part into two more parts. So this first part (3a) focuses mostly on the Original Characters that are characters from the role play game X-Future. The next part (3b) - which will be published in a few minutes - will focus on the characters that started off as X-Men canonical characters, and how I reworked them into originals.

If any of this sounds interesting to you, feel free to keep reading below the break. If you'd rather just skip on ahead to the character bios themselves, my first one should be up next Sunday.

First, I should probably explain how characters are supposed to be formed in the game that birthed Glitches. As I mentioned in Part 1, Glitches started its life as an X-Men role play on a message board/internet forum in a Play-By-Post style. The role play game is called X-Future, and I loved the story we were telling so much that I wanted to re-tell it to the world. However, the more I build Glitches, and the more I try to make the story an original work, the more I realize that only a small portion of the characters and overall role played plot can truly transition over.

Regardless, the way characters are created for X-Future is as follows:

My husband has a lineage chart set up on the forum. There are two lists of available X-Men comic book canonical characters: list of usually male and usually female characters. I say “usually” because there are characters like Mystique, who is usually recognized as a female character, but is technically gender fluid, and has had long canonical runs as a male character.

The players get to choose ONE of the listed characters; therefore choosing either their character's father or mother. This allows the players to have a connection to at least one canonical character of their choice, and/or the potential for a power set they'd like to have for their character.

Hubby then rolls on the other chart to determine the other parent. Therefore, if a player chooses a female character for their parent, Hubby rolls on the male list to find the OC's father. There is also a “Sinister Shenanigans” option where the X-Men character Mr. Sinister created you as a clone of two mutants, in which case your “parents” could be both male or both female as well as the standard “a male and a female.” There is also a chance – again using Mystique as an example – for your character to have “same-sex” parents biologically, since Mystique could also be someone's “father.”

Once parentage is figured out – and Hubby posts the second biological parent on the boards – he then rolls on another chart to determine the character's power set. He does this because it keeps the players on their toes, evolution is weird, and real life is random, so why can't games be? Options he uses for a character's powers include:  --> Character inherits powers from both parents in equal amounts  --> Character inherits powers from both parents, but favors the father's powers with only hints of the mother's powers  --> Character inherits powers from both parents, but favors the mother's powers with only hints of the father's powers   --> Character inherits a variant of both parents' powers  --> Character's powers are a mesh of both parents' powers (for instance, a fire manipulator and a rock manipulator could produce a lava manipulator)   --> Character inherits father's powers  --> Character inherits mother's powers  --> Character inherits a variant of father's powers  --> Character inherits a variant of mother's powers  --> Character inherits neither parents' powers, and instead forms their own powers (I think that's all of the options he uses...)

Once Hubby figures out the mutation the character has, he posts it on the boards. After that, the player then gets (mostly) free rein to create their character. Some other restrictions include the starting age of the character being high-school-age unless special permission was given, the backstory of the character must not counter other character's backstories or the already established history of our Marvel continuity, the character has to be an Xavier Institute student or Brotherhood of Mutants member, and Hubby needs to double check character profiles for any potential issues before they can be posted. (It's rare that Hubby doesn't approve of the profile)

So, those are the basic 5-easy-steps to creating an X-Future character, which comes into play with 2 of the characters I'll introduce today. Speaking of, let’s get to them, huh?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chayse LeBeau [Last Name to be Changed]

Ironically, I'm going to start off with a character that isn't mine. Chayse is my husband's character, but he gave me full permission to use him in Glitches. Mostly because he trusts my treatment of his character – most of my Miraculous Ladybug readers will tell you I'm very good at keeping characters True-to-Canon – and because Hubby knows that I'll probably talk about nearly every single one of Chayse's lines and actions with him, just to make sure I'm keeping him in character.

Chayse, being my husband's character, was the first character ever made for X-Future. Hubby's favorite X-Men of all time is Remy “Gambit” LeBeau, so naturally Hubby chose him as Chayse's father. When Hubby rolled onto Kitty “Shadowcat” Pryde as Chayse's mother, we had to do some quick continuity work to figure out HOW that relationship happened. We are HARD CORE Gambit/Rogue shippers. They are by FAR our OTP (with Shadowcat/Colossus as a close second). If Gambit was with anyone other than Rogue, we needed a reason for Rogue to not be in the picture; not a possibility at all. Hubby created an event called The Reaping where Professor Charles Xavier, Jean Grey, Magneto, Mastermind, and Rogue all die in battle. There may have been some other casualties, but those are the main ones I remember...

Anyway, once we realized Rogue had to be dead for Gambit to be with anyone else significantly enough to have a kid with them, we then went back to “X-Men: Evolution”; the show that inspired Hubby to create X-Future. In the TV series, Kitty and Rogue were besties, and so Hubby and I decided that Kitty and Gambit were comforting each other in their grief over losing Rogue. That grew into a tight friendship, and eventually a romance blossomed. The two got married, and Chayse was born.

Chayse is basically my husband without the anxiety and terrible knees. If Hubby could be as athletic and outgoing as he wished he could be, he'd be Chayse.

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Amelia “Lia” Mordeaux [Last Name Still Workshopping]

Lia was my first-ever character for X-Future. Since Rogue is clearly my favorite X-Men – I mean... check the handle and icon – I really wanted to chose her as my character's parent. However, after Hubby and I jointly determined that Rogue had been dead for nearly two decades, I struggled to figure out who else to choose. So many different power sets and great characters. However, in the end I ended up going with Amara “Magma” Aquilla. I am a bit of a fire freak – something that will come up later – so the idea of my character being able to manipulate magma seemed fun to try. In truth, though, the deciding factor – aside from how adorable Magma was in “X-Men: Evolution” - is the fact that her name is Amara.... like my Gyateara character; my oldest OC.

Rolling on the chart, Hubby landed on Jamie “Multiple Man” Madrox. Based on the personality we saw in “X-Men: Evolution,” and ignoring that poor Jamie was only about 12 or 13 when depicted on the show, I lamented at how “lame” Lia's father was going to be. In the end, I did sprinkle in a touch of the badassness Jamie showcases in the comics, as well as whenever he's shown – usually as a villain *sigh* - in the cartoons. However, he's still LARGELY a nerd still for X-Future, and became a bit of a neurotic helicopter parent.

Lia ended up with her mother's powers exactly. The only difference is that instead of just a magma form, Lia encases herself within obsidian skin. I even designed her to look like Amara did in Evolution, with the straight brown hair and Brazilian skin. (It was easier for Evolution to just have Amara be Brazilian than trying to explain the existence of Neo Roma within the Brazilian rain forest so she could remain White with blonde hair and blue eyes) Lia being basically a carbon-copy of her mother – something I headcanon as Jamie's duplication DNA accidentally turning Amara's egg into a clone of her – meant my next struggle was trying to figure out why Lia was at the Xavier Institute. I didn't want her to have been raised there, but why couldn't Amara just train her daughter on how to control identical powers?

In the end, I decided that Amara has to go. Hubby and I came up with a mission where Amara went MIA. She is perceived dead, but isn't confirmed dead, along with Storm, who went missing on a similar mission a few years prior. Without his wife to help train their daughter, and having NO CLUE how to handle a 14yo blowing up his yard with geysers, Jamie sent Lia to the Institute, and promptly signed up as a faculty member so he could still be close to and keep an eye on his daughter: the last family he has left, and a reminder of his wife.

For Glitches, I did end up shifting Lia's race to Hawaiian (Polynesian? Should I specify?). Having her be part Native Hawaiian just felt more fitting with the lava-focused powers. Yes, there are volcanoes in Brazil, there is also one in Washington state. Still, you wouldn't necessarily equate Washington state with lava as much as you would equate lava with Hawaii.

Lia was SUPPOSED to be my naive rebel; a 14yo who was getting her first taste of freedom at the Institute. She was going to wear less-conservative outfits, be flirty, and maybe break a few rules: curfew, being in the guys' wing of the dorms, skipping a class or two, etc. She even started off like that... for about a game session or two. She instantly fell into her main personality though: reserved, shy, maternal, and unsure of herself. While I do love this character and who she is, she also wasn't who I initially wanted to play. Enter: Willow.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Willow Driver

Originally, we had about a dozen players, which was fantastic. However, Hubby still wanted to “fill out” the school. He wanted a few NPC students the players could interact with when the other players weren't available. He had a small list of NPCs, some of which will make their way to Glitches as background characters. On this list was Willow. Hubby actually created her, designed her, and was all set to role play as her. Then we got to talking about how I loved Lia, but was a bit disappointed that she didn't turn out the character I was aiming for. Hubby knew that Willow was indeed much more like who I wanted to play, so he passed her over to me.

Soon enough, Willow went from an NPC I ran to my secondary character. Since she was the character I wanted to play the whole time, she quickly surpassed poor Lia as my preferred character. In fact, a lot of my “companion stories” that I have written for X-Future center around Willow. Specifically, Willow and my friend Ronoxym's character Devon. They have a.... complicated relationship. Willow is just a much more fun character to write. She's playful, manipulative, unsure, confident, loyal... she's just a walking ball of contradictions as she's trying to figure herself out.

If Chayse is who Hubby wishes he could be, then Willow is me with virtually no inhibitions. She's my playfulness, my confidence, my lust, my impulsiveness, my spontaneity, and the athletic prowess I wish I had.

In contrast, Lia is basically everything keeping me from being Willow: my caution, my fear of disappointing my parents (both the one who passed and the one who raised me), my maternal instincts, my reservations, my critical thinking, my constant knowledge of potential consequences, and my insecurity that I'm ever going to be the best version of myself.

There's one more side of me though. That's where Trish comes in.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Patricia “Trish” Morrison

Trish did NOT turn out remotely close to who she was in my head. Heck, she even refused to be properly formed while I still was picturing her in her first incarnation. Trish truly did create herself.

Remember my friend Ronoxym's character Devon I mentioned a few paragraphs up? Well, he's the son of two Brotherhood of Mutants characters. In other words, he's the son of villains. He was orphaned as an infant, and when he was a teen at the Xavier Institute he ran into his father Pyro. The man suspected that Devon could be his long-lost son, and hinted that if Devon joined the Brotherhood then Pyro could help Devon figure out who he was. Devon eventually took the bait, and left to join the Brotherhood and discover who his parents were.

At the time, The Brotherhood was just made up of the Marvel canon characters; no one there for Ron to role play against aside from NPCs. I decided to create Trish so he would have a player character to role play off of. Originally, Trish was supposed to be a potential love interest for him.

Trish.... was not a fan. I actually had mental images of Trish gagging at the thought of her destined romance with Devon. Even when I tried picturing her flirting with Devon for the sole purpose of getting close enough to stab him or slit his throat: a sort of Black Widow character. She still gagged and REFUSED to let me have her show Devon anything other than disdain. He became her number 1 rival; her arch nemesis. She was actually in love with Pyro, and hated that Pyro's attention was now torn between her and his long-lost son. Her goal in life, aside from making Pyro fall in love with her; age be damned, was to murder Devon.

She then became more psychotic the more I wrote her. She has the power to create fire, and is completely fireproof herself. She loved playing with her fire, and became a pyrophile; getting highly aroused around flame. She had the stereotypical serial killer childhood of fulfilling her early bloodlust by torturing and killing animals. When she got caught by her twin sister, and her parents threatened to call the Mutant Police to collect her, Trish burnt everyone alive in their family home. She then lived on the streets, killing anyone who got in her way of survival. Eventually, she got taken in by The Brotherhood and Pyro, where her murderous tendencies were aimed at anti-mutant groups like The Purifiers.

If each of my main X-Future/Glitches characters (jointly named simply My Girls) is a part of my personality, then Trish is my anger, my love of fire, my dark desire to be an arson (ya know, if it didn't cause terrible destruction and harm), my ability to hold grudges, and my aggression. I wanted her to be fairly on-par with Azula from “Avatar: The Last Airbender,” but with her manic end-game personality making more of an appearance. I wanted her to be like Minatsuki Takami from “Deadman Wonderland”, or Tanya Degurechaff from “The Saga of Tanya the Evil.” In other words: tiny and unassuming, but terrifying and intimidating if her true self is ever seen.

I don't know if I never played her correctly, or if Ron just couldn't picture a character I run as THAT intimidating, because Devon was always quite unfazed by Trish and her threats...

EDIT: Holy smokes! How did I completely forget that Trish has theme music!? The main reason Trish is yet ANOTHER fire user, when we already have so many in X-Future, is because of her theme song. See, I was fairly obsessed with Fall Out Boy’s song “My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark (Light Em Up)” when it first came out. I would spend days just listening to it and “Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons on repeat.

One day I was rocking out to MSKWYDITD for probably the 4th time in a row or something, and I lamented Lia being so mild mannered. I would have loved to have had a chaotic fire user that would follow the destructive high energy I felt whenever I heard that song. Someone who would as much fun as those women in the music video. I mean, just watch them. I wanted a character with their energy and vibe: 

I wanted another fire user, and Devon had JUST defected to The Brotherhood on X-Future, so I figured it would be perfect to make that more chaotic fire user as a Brotherhood member. THAT was when I figured “She could be a good foil for Devon; two fire users, one more chaotic than the other”... and THAT was when Trish went “Fire yes; Devon fuck no!”

I haven’t been able to control her since...

------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

So, there you have it, the truly original characters that make up the core cast of Glitches. Next up, as in a few minutes, will be the adult cast of my story: the characters reworked from their X-Men canonical origins. Stay tuned!

[sinfulavenue]

Episode 40 - Old Story Review

(Manga spoilers)

Overall: Less exciting than last week’s episode but a much needed break in the action to focus on character.

Before I get down to the nitty gritty of episode 40 I just want to say that in order to give my reviews more depth I decided to reread the Uprising Arc. I mean it’s been like 2 years since I read it and admittedly there was a lot of important stuff I’d forgotten.

Just to give you an idea just how immense the restructuring is, episode 40 is comprised of scenes from chapters 52, 55, 56, 57 and 59. Regarding the changes in the anime, I’m still at the same place I was last week and my thoughts remain on hold until I see more, but I enjoyed this episode. It made sense to open the season with action but now I’m glad the pace is slowing in order to catch up on important details.

Historia

When I first read Historia’s back story it broke my heart and seeing it animated broke it a second time. Just about every character in the series has tragedy in their past but Historia’s is particularly devastating because she grew up deprived of affection, shunned by the person who should have loved her the most.

How Alma treated Historia is unforgivable but for some reason I pitied her, not just because of the gruesome end she met but for the miserable life she inflicted upon herself. I felt sorry for her for being so cold and for not even trying to love her sweet little daughter. With an open heart she could have had so much more happiness but instead from the moment Historia was born, she resigned herself to a life of misery and resentment where she couldn’t even embrace her own child.

A wretched woman who led a wretched existence.

The way Historia finds out about her royal blood is handled very differently in the anime and it is through her father she learns of her heritage. While I’m still unsure about the changes, it did make me emotional to see her tear up when Rod told her because I knew exactly why she was crying.

After spending her whole life feeling unwanted she finally felt like she had a place. The flashback coming before this scene really emphasised why it meant so much to her. I look forward to seeing Historia be faced with moral dilemmas, to almost give in and do exactly what’s expected of her before finding the strength to reject her father’s ideals and take charge of her own destiny (*sob Ymir would be so proud!). I just hope Historia get’s the character growth she deserves this season.

Sannes Learns of his Betrayal

I just love psycho Hanji! I guess maybe I felt a bit sorry for Sannes when he realised he’d been tricked into betraying the king (gosh I’m feeling sorry for everyone this week aren’t I?), but this furthers the message that it’s not as simple as good guys and bad guys anymore.

Eren will be eaten!

In the manga, how titan shifters inherit the power was revealed during a conversation between Hanji and Erwin but in the anime it was done in front of Levi’s squad and we get to see their reaction to the prospect of Eren being imminently eaten.

Ok so I have to get this off my chest ... How many more god damn times do we need to see Levi saving Mikasa from her impulses? I let it slide last week but then it happened again this week and it’s really starting to piss me off. Not only are these additional scenes unnecessary but they are really disappointing. Makes it seem like she’s learned nothing since the female titan encounter. She’s protective of Eren, we get it! We don’t need to be reminded every time his name is mentioned by her flaring up in a violent rage.

I just hope this isn’t a trend that will persist. It’s time they showed that there’s more to her than that.

Erwin

So this episode presented us with another tragic childhood story. The second half of this episode was dedicated entirely to building Erwin’s character and I have to say that how his story was handled really showed that the restructuring isn’t random or thoughtless. It was powerful to have Erwin’s childhood flashback immediately preceded by the scene where he vows to avenge Reeves death. Like his father, Reeves was one more problematic individual who had to be snuffed out by the corrupt military police. These two scenes really complement one another when shown side by side as we see how Erwin’s past is driving his motivation in the present.

I’m also glad we got to see Hanji being named as his successor, this moment is significant too as it showed that Erwin really believed his time may be up.

After the arrest of the Survey Corps I noticed that a conversation between Hanji and Flegel from the manga is missing but it looks like it might be in next week’s episode based on the preview. It’s the one they have on the rooftop where they discuss Reeves death and the hopelessness of the situation. I hope this scene has been kept as I like the part where Flegel says that they’ve lost to which Hanji replies that the Survey Corps have always been the losers but that it never stopped them before.

Inspiring!

Update on my thoughts regarding the changes

While I’ve been enjoying the series so far and unlike a lot of people I don’t think Wit studio are doing a terrible job at all, but this week I’m going to express a little bit of criticism based on what I’ve seen so far.

After rereading the manga I realised just how much certain scenes gave meaning and context to later events. The restructuring has resulted in many of these scenes being cut or moved meaning that some moments don’t have the impact they once did.

The most prominent example of this is the scene in last week’s episode where Jean apologizes to Levi for not shooting. In the manga Jean’s distrust of Levi was something that built up over the course of a few chapters, beginning when Levi attacked Historia and reaching a climax when Jean hesitated to kill when ordered to. There was a scene in the middle where Jean, Connie and Sasha, after the Survey Corps were blamed for Reeves death, talked about how being criminals wasn’t what they signed up for when they joined the Survey Corps and they expressed their doubts about their Captain. This provides so much context for Jean’s actions later and that conversation he has with Levi after Armin’s kill.

This is another reason why Levi attacking Historia was such an important moment because it’s what started the squad’s distrust of Levi in the first place and it directly affected Jean’s actions in the MP chase scene.

While watching last week’s episode, I feel like I kind of subconsciously knew the context behind that conversation Jean had with Levi (I feel like my brain has been doing a lot of filling in the blanks this season) but anime only people do not have this context and they are the ones who are really missing out here.

Don’t get me wrong, I still think Armin’s kill in the anime was a critical moment and the guilt and sickness he felt for taking a human life was portrayed well but what’s missing is that important context that would have given the scene additional weight.

The Uprising Arc is a complex one and I sense Isayama and Wit felt it wouldn’t translate well to anime fans who were expecting combat and titan slaying. I’m long past accepting that the anime is going to be a simplified retelling (this image springs to mind).

But instead of being bitter about it I’m trying to see it this way. Neither manga or anime are perfect but they enhance one another and the anime doing it differently doesn’t take away from the manga or discredit it in any way. The manga gives greater meaning and context to the scenes I’m watching in the anime meanwhile the anime is treating me to stunning visuals, incredible voice acting and beautiful soundtracks that just isn’t possible in a manga format.  

Aaand I’m rambling aren’t I?

I look forward to next weeks episode. I suspect the pace will remain constant for a few episodes before picking up again.

I guess I’ll conclude with some Connie appreciation.

We love you Connie! Keep being your clueless, dorky, weird, adorable self 😂

[shockcity]

Bagginshield #6 - wearing each other’s clothes

Rating: M Summary: for the 30 Day OTP Challenge. A mix up with the hotel dry cleaning service leaves Bilbo and Thorin in love ill-fitted suits. AU - Modern Setting 

What happens is this:

1. O'Hare to LAX on a red-eye 2. a chicken salad sandwich 3. Dwalin's advice

Alternatively: he is exhausted, covered in food stains, and who the hell wears a suit on a plane? You just have to break it in, Dwalin had said, as if he had any idea how to fashion (Dwalin had worn a suit a total of zero times, and hadn't even dressed up for his own wedding). Breaking in said suit (and his only suit, mind) had resulted in a sandwich oozing down his front and a minor panic over what the hell Thorin was supposed to do now.

The conference was at noon and it was just past 10, and the only change of clothes he'd brought was a pair of old jeans, an AC/DC shirt, and some severely out-of-style walking shoes. He couldn't go in street clothes, and there wasn't enough time to find and buy a suit before he was supposed to be at the convention center for the presentation. He was so screwed.

He texted Dwalin.

"Does this hotel have dry cleaning?" he obediently asked the concierge.

She was tall, tan, and beautiful, and maybe a clone, since he was pretty sure a girl that looked just like her had been his flight attendant, had worked at a Starbucks around the block, and had bumped into him in the lobby while she was distracted with her phone. Thorin squinted at her suspiciously. Clones.

A large, fake smile stretched across her face. "Of course, sir," she said, her teeth very straight and very white. "This is the Omni."

Thorin wasn't sure if she was being condescending or not, since the smile was really throwing him off. Thorin was from Chicago. Los Angeles made no sense. They did indeed have dry cleaning. Awesome.

"Can you rush this?" he said, holding up his suit. "I have to be at the convention center in an hour."

He expected her to say, "of course, sir, this is the Omni," again, but instead she kindly told him that it was no problem and took his suit away. He breathed a sigh of relief.  

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What happens is this:

1. Everything that could have possibly gone wrong 2. went wrong 3. with feeling

Heathrow to LAX, sleepless layover at JFK, luggage lost from London to New York to Los Angeles, apparently nonexistent hotel reservations, and one skinny soy vanilla latte topped with whipped cream spilled all down his front. Why the soy? No one knows.

Bilbo was admittedly a dramatic little shit, but he was pretty sure that his current crisis would test even the patience of a saint. In a panic, he'd practically shoved his suit into the concierge's arms the moment he had arrived at the Omni. This was before he realized that his reservations had apparently been cancelled, of course.

After a good few minutes of hemming and hawing on the concierge's end, and some seriously explosive sighing on his, Bilbo was finally checked in and guaranteed that his suit would be cleaned by noon. Yeah, right.

In a terrible temper, Bilbo slammed into his hotel room and threw his carry-on bag onto the bed. He landed on his back next to it, hands pressed against his eyes.

He was frustrated, and tired, and nervous about his being the stupid keynote speaker when everyone knew he had terrible stage fright. All he wanted was to get this over with and go home. Or at least sleep a little, even if just for an hour.

But he needed a goddamn suit, so he sighed and texted Prim.

He took his cousin's advice and called the front desk, Yelping each recommendation they gave him. Bilbo had just found a four and a half star tailor on Pico when a new text from Ori came in.

He...wow.

This day.

He buried his head into his pillow and had a good long scream.

His phone continued to buzz as Ori lost whatever chill he had once had, which was none, so he was in the negatives and Bilbo could not keep ignoring him. Resignedly, he picked his phone up and engaged in a long and drawn out text conversation that consisted of two electronically illiterate historians troubleshooting everything and turning things on and off while holding down random control keys. Nothing happened. Go figure.

Finally, just as Bilbo, too, had realized the inevitable, Ori decided enough was enough.

This fucking day.

-----

"Listen, I'm sorry," Thorin said, checking his watch again. "I really need my suit."

"Of course, sir, we're bringing it out now."

He was late and would have to change in the bathroom at the convention center and it was almost noon and they'd said it would be done already and they were getting such a bad review on Yelp, he swore to god...

Finally, they handed him a dress bag and he yelled a quick thank you and sprinted out of the hotel.

Of course it wasn't his suit in the bag. That would be silly.

-----

"Thank you so much," said Bilbo, practically snatching the dress bag from the hotel worker. It was ten till and he was on in twenty, and he was cutting it way too close. Despite his snappishness with the poor bellboy, he did tip well, considering they'd done as requested and had gone out of their way to deliver his suit to the conference. They were maybe even worth four stars on Yelp. Maybe.

Across the convention center, Thorin was gazing at his entirely too tight suit in shock and confusion. The pants were too short and his socks were showing. This...was a nightmare.

-----

Unintelligible screaming suddenly erupted from the men's room. Worried, Ori shuffled over and tapped on the door.

"Bilbo?"

"GOD BUGGERING SHIT."

"Ok."

-----

Bilbo had no choice but to deliver his speech in a suit that belonged to someone far bulkier and taller than him. He was positively swimming in it and he felt like an absolute fool.

Thorin sat down and ripped his pants.

-----

Afterward, there was socializing to be done and alcoholic drinks to be had, but Bilbo had no desire to join in, nor could he abide remaining in this awful suit for a second longer.

"I'm going back to the hotel," he sighed at Ori. "Then I'm going to sleep for twelve hours. And cry a little. Okay, a lot."

"You did great, Bilbo, really!" said Ori, his eyes big and honest.

"Sure." He waved a hand. "I'll text you when I've gotten my dignity back. Say hello to Dwalin for me."

"Will do!" Ori wiggled his fingers goodbye. "Good luck!"

He headed for the exit, following the crowd of people that were also cutting out early. Thank god for antisocial history geeks, Bilbo thought, distracted. That's how he bumped into someone practically running for the door.

The man had his hands over his arse, believe it or not, and he was sweating nervously as he sprinted past. Bilbo had looked up, ready to eviscerate this violator of his personal space verbally, but then stopped.

"You."

"You!"

He took a moment to look at Thorin Oakenshield properly, and then gaped at him – scandalized.

"That's my suit!”

----

What happened was this:

7 months earlier

1. "Hi. I'm Bilbo Baggins." 2. "Thorin Oakenshield." 3. "You're a linguist aren't you? Yes, I've heard about you. You specialize in Khuzdul. You know, I wrote a paper on the similarities between Quenya and Khuzdul and it turns out they're a lot alike. Ereborians, for example, took elements of Woodland phrasing and passed them off as their own, and according to–" 4. "...oh, is he leaving? Did I say something wrong?"

5 months earlier

1. A job offer 2. A formal meeting 3. "Mr. Baggins. Yes, I remember you. At least you don't look like a grocer today." 4. target acquired.

2 months earlier

1. "Chicago isn't much different from any other city, and Prim is there, and Ori...so I'll think about it, yeah." 2. Another formal meeting 3. UST 4. "That Baggins is a menace." 5. "Oakenshield can kiss my ass." 6. Let simmer.

Now

"You."

"You!"

"That's my suit!"

"And that's mine," said Thorin, peering at him confusedly. "There...was... a mix up."

"Obviously," Bilbo seethed. "Unless you just go around stealing people's clothes."

Thorin, thankfully, did not engage.

"SorryBagginsIhavetogo," he squeaked, and tried to edge away with his hands still firmly placed on his posterior.

"Hold on, what have you done?!"

There was no use trying to stop Bilbo from tearing his hands away and seeing the damage. Bilbo was truly an unstoppable force, and Thorin, from the very beginning of their rocky acquaintance, had been left utterly speechless in Bilbo's presence (either because Bilbo was aggravating him into silence or because he couldn't quite believe just how much noise was coming out of this little angry cinnamon roll person). And now Bilbo was pushing him toward the door and making demands. As was his wont.

"And I want my suit back! What's left of it! And take your hands off your butt."

Thorin groaned. "Let me at least have some dignity."

"No."

They took a cab back to the Omni and argued the entire way there, annoying the cab driver enough that at one point he laid on the horn to shut them up. Once they arrived, Thorin immediately set off for his rooms with Bilbo following closely behind. He didn't trust that Thorin would give him his suit back. Whatever.

In the hotel room, Bilbo was inspecting the state of his ripped pants sadly. Thorin stood there in his boxers, feeling a little guilty despite himself.

"I didn't think this day could get any worse," Bilbo sighed. "That was my favorite suit."

Thorin shifted from foot to foot. "Ah. Sorry."

For a second, it looked as though Bilbo was going to forgive him. For a second, his face was open and soft and friendly. And then the diva came rushing right back and they were squabbling heatedly again.

Neither of them knew who kissed who first and later they'd argue about that too.

----

It was cold out on the balcony, but the room was non-smoking and Bilbo was sorry, but the post-coital cigarette was not overrated, and Thorin (who he could see was peering at him from the bed) seemed rather pleased with how Bilbo looked out here; freezing bollocks and all. So pleased, in fact, that Thorin came out to join him.

Bilbo turned to gaze at the flat, sparkling city, as arms wrapped around him from behind.

"Are you wearing my shirt?" Thorin whispered into his ear, his hands running up and down Bilbo's stomach.

"And nothing else," Bilbo teased. "I wanted to feel like I was in a movie."

Thorin kissed his neck, and that was very nice indeed. "Well, you're in the right place."

"Hmm."

Bilbo finished his cigarette and crushed it on the edge of the balcony. He closed his eyes, swaying a little as Thorin teased his neck, strong hips moving against him. "Mmm, you want to have another go?” said Bilbo. “My flight's not until tomorrow night."

Thorin abruptly drew away, and Bilbo felt a rush of confusion and panic. He turned around in Thorin's arms and stared up at him, scowling.

"Why've you suddenly gone cold?" he asked suspiciously.

"I'm not," Thorin lied, trying to keep his face expressionless.

"You have," Bilbo insisted, planting his hands on his hips. "What's the problem? Are you regretting this now?"

He looked taken aback. "No! No, not...." He cleared his throat. "Not at all."

Bilbo glared at him. "Then what, Thorin?"

"The, uh, long distance relationships...thing. I'm not...I've never...."

Relieved, but still a bit frustrated, Bilbo huffed and shook his head. "Honestly? That's your problem? Lord."

Thorin opened his mouth to protest, his expression angry now, but Bilbo held up his hand.

"Now, I'm not saying that it has anything to do with you," Bilbo told him sternly. "But I've decided to take the job."

Thorin gaped for a moment.

"In Chicago?"

Bilbo rolled his eyes. "Yes, in Chicago. So...we wouldn't be long distance. Conveniently enough. I mean since I'd already decided to move before we had sex. So don't get cocky. Oi! Get that look off your face...."

Thorin was smirking. "Uh huh," he said. "Nothing to do with me. Right."

Bilbo only shook his head, and reached out and pulled Thorin close again. They kissed, hot and wet and new, and Bilbo couldn't help but arch toward that strong, wide chest. "Mmmm," he murmured, pulling away. "Just FYI, I'm keeping this shirt."

Thorin grinned against his mouth. "How about now?" he said, and then ripped the dress shirt open. Buttons pinged on the railing and a couple flew off into the night.

"GAH! Thorin!!”

BONUS