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morgandria · 4 years

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Moon Musings

I am on day #!^* of One Of -Those- Migraines (thanks, March), so while I’m sitting here trying not to be miserable, you’re getting some moon stuff. I have a pile of random thoughts that are trying to coalesce themselves into a coherent lunar-focused project in the future, so the moon has been on my mind. In many ways, I miss the moon. I live on a street corner in town where two separate lights shine directly on my yard, and since they installed new LED lights there's no such thing as darkness at night. Even my backyard, which would be in the shadow of the house normally, is lit since the LEDs spill farther and brighter now, and my neighbours keep their back porch light on all the time. We won't even talk about the fact that out of the last 16 months, I think we had full cloud cover for about 14 of them. That's the reality.

So this is more of the woo side. This is UPG, 100%. I often don’t use traditional names for the different Full Moons - some of them don’t resonate, so I do what works for me. Secondly, my personal lunar lore behind the names I do use is all mashed up with a whole lot of synesthesia, and some personal experiences. So...if any of this works for you or entertains you, cool. If not? No worries. Do your thing, and I’ll do mine. I also live in Ontario, and always have, so my experiences and practices are absolutely rooted here. Weather patterns and seasons won't work the same elsewhere, so you need to work with what you've got.

January: Wolf Moon

I do use a traditional name for this moon, but only because I used to go howling with the wolves in the back 40 when I was a teenager. I used to be able to take long white walks in the fields when they were all lit up, and were fortunate to have some lupine neighbours. I love the sharpness of the night sky, and finding moments of silence and stillness. More practically these days I bundle up at home away from the ice and the cold and enjoy a good cup of tea when I can. The vibration of this moon's energy always seems to bring me insomnia, though. The colours I associate with January’s moon are white, silver, red, and a deep amethyst. Other things, more randomly: birch trees, the sound of cracking ice, the hissing of river reeds in the wind.

February: Storm Moon

There’s a tempestuous feel to February’s moon for me. It’s usually the month we get intensely cold. January is often a icy, thaw/freeze mess, but February always feels like the time when Winter decides it’s time to really throw its’ weight around with some serious storms. The feel of this moon’s energy is sinuous for me, sliding around and into everything, but also fierce. There’s something profoundly cleansing about letting a sharp winter wind pierce through to your bones and strip away all the gunk cluttering up your energy. My colours for this moon are grey and deep blues, like Prussian blue or steel blue. Other things: labradorite, blue tiger’s eye, and the smell of wintergreen,

March: Crow Moon

This is the moon when my crows come back to my neighbourhood. They usually move out around the start of December, and I start to see and hear them again around the start of March. Nothing about March in Ontario is spring-like: it’s either a solid mass of ice coating everything, or faded grey-brown and thick with mud. Ugh. I actually used to camp on March break as a teenager, but inevitably it ended up with a dozen frozen teenagers in a friend's kitchen having an impromptu Sunday breakfast while I woke up and wondered where everyone'd gone. (Stir-crazy kids in the sticks with nothing to do for a week do silly things.) Nowadays, I’d rather look up at the skies than down at the earth during this moon, and I choose to focus on my corvid friends because they make me happy. Crow Moon is somehow all aquas and peacock blues in colour, and mare’s tails in impossible blue skies, and the world smells once again of fresh, clean Earth, when the ice lets it through.

April: Seed Moon

Maybe the moon where (people who are better gardeners than me) start to get their seeds in the ground. I live in a snow belt, so I don't trust myself to plant anything until May. It's still not super warm, or even remotely dry, but there starts to be hints of things like warmer sun and breezes around the edges. Later in the month you get those days where pollen and snow can fly at the same time. There's no leaves yet, but you can see the buds getting fatter. I think of it as a "restful" time during the year, before summer gets really busy with family and friends. If we're having a good Spring I might get a day or two where I can actually get outside and tidy the yard some. I associate Seed Moon with the colours of soft buttery yellow and pale peridot green, which starts to invade around the rust-brown-green background. It's a citrine month, and also one where those little blue flowers come up in people's lawns.

May: Hare Moon

We don't have hares here. I wish we did - I used to see snowshoe hares in the country when I was wee - but I have rabbits, at least. And yet, this is not "Rabbit Moon". A hare is a different beast from a rabbit entirely. They have a fierce wildness that our Eastern Cottontails do not. And for me, the moon of May, the month of Beltane and the nuptials of the Lord and Lady, have a fierce, wild joy as the world finally explodes with warmth and light and leaves and flowers. I don't ever really trust winter is gone until mid-May. Hare Moon is emerald and violet and velvet, the shadow of leaves and sweet intoxicating aromas. There's something tactile about it - you want to run your hands through it, let it brush past you and run its' fingers through your hair.

June: Mead Moon

I sometimes also call this the Honey Moon. It is the sweetest time of the summer for me, before it's mind-meltingly hot. You get those gorgeous days that are still draped in gentle grey veils of rain on the growing, swaying green fields, and the flowers are growing tall and tangled - honeysuckle, clover, alfalfa and St. John's Wort. There are bees -everywhere-, and the very first of the summer fruits are coming ripe and I spend eight months of the year absolutely dying for the four when we get local, seasonal fruit. It's an idyll, before I'm completely sunbaked and dried out in the heat. Mead Moon is all sky blue and honey gold, saffron and ultramarine. It's warm sand and cold lakes, the smell of hay drying in the fields, and long drives down country roads to escape the concrete of town.

July: Satyr Moon

This month's moon is probably the time when folks in these parts get up to the most outdoor activity. I associate it most with a kind of revelry and hedonism - hence the 'satyr'. We get people taking their vacations, heading to the cottage, the campsite, and having their reunions and parties. Concerts, fairs, festivals...we have a lot to cram into a short time. The lilies in my yard finally have bloomed their brilliant orange, by the start of the month, and July is one long stretch of pure jewel-like greens, under bleached blue skies. This is the other month, like April, where everything feels like it's just poised, waiting to explode with the brisk business of harvest. For me, this moon is natural life in its' prime, and despite my dislike of intense heat and humidity I try to remind myself to enjoy it where and how I can. Satyr Moon is an endless mosaic of greens, a heady musky smell of wood and water, cedar and leaf, shadows and firelight dancing, and distant music everywhere.

August: Barley Moon

This moon is the first harvest moon, here, when the wheat is finally harvested and all that dust in the air makes it ripe and golden and warm. Haying season will sometimes give the moon a bit of a gold tint earlier on, but not those deep amber rises I adore in August. I am an August Virgo, and I adore the Barley Moon - I mean, I quite literally worship wheat. All the first fruits of harvest are peaking, there's SO much goodness in the fields, and yet I can feel summer slowing down, and gradually waning to a bronze-green glowing that I absolutely adore. The nature of daylight changes, subtly, and I try to catch onto every sunset and fix it into my brain, to save it for those white winter days when we haven't seen even the notion of sun for weeks. When we slide from the scorch of the dog days into long, gloaming evenings and cooler nights and the hints of colour on the leaves at the end of the month - heaven. Barley Moon is wheaten and speckled browns, endless golds, blackberry and peach, the smell of dry grass and fresh corn. It's countless toasted tomato sandwiches, far too much zucchini, and penetrating spears of bronze light through the trees as the sun slides away to let the fat amber moon rise up.

September: Harvest Moon

There's no stopping harvest. This moon is when -everything- comes down, and you have no choice but to get your ass moving. You try to get as much of it off the vine while it's best. I get very hobbity when Harvest comes, and I want to be living a simple life. I start to miss home, and rural life, and my family, a lot. It feels different than my youth, and it's...wrong now, somehow. These days it's more like Second July - it rarely cools off below 20°C., it's often stupidly humid, and can be much, much warmer. Our changing climate makes it feel like a month of dragging what I dislike most about Summer out, and it just feels unnatural. Add into that everyone still running around trying to pretend like Summer isn't ending, and I do not like it much for that reason. September always ends up cluttered and rushed, just too much going on in our lives for various reasons. I wish I appreciated it more, but I don't. But there are moments: the deepening indigo of September twilights, the movement of the birds (both those ready to move on and those snatching up all the food they can before the cold comes), the exuberance of goldenrod and Queen Anne's lace and asters. Harvest Moon is indigo and wine-red, the sweetness of a frost-touched grape, the musk of a yeast-laden apple's skin, and the first cries of the migrating geese.

October: Hunter's Moon

Hunter's Moon has two sides. From the start of October, until Thanksgiving, is gorgeous, brilliant leaves and bright crisp skies. It's deep blue waters reflecting streaks of smoke and high cloud. Any time after that, it can snow. It certainly will get wet and windy, at the very least. And then everything is grey, torrents of wine-dark leaves all with that sugar-sweet rot as they lie where they fall intertwined with the smell of the cold and everyone's woodstoves firing up. I cannot tell you how much this season refills my spirit. It's always been a hunter's moon for me. Various hunting seasons start (turkey, duck, deer, then into moose later in the fall), and I have many fond memories of delicious game meat meals with family well into the spring. It was a vital part of life, and always done with respect and thanks. Hunter's Moon is grey on grey, the edges of smokey obsidian and crimson-carnelian-red. It is antler and bone and slow-burning hardwood, the hissing of the corn stalks drying in the darkening fields.

November: Snow Moon

You'll see Snow Moons all over the winter calender, depending on where you live. For me, winter starts at Samhain, and it is inevitable that we have snow here very close to that date (whether before or after). It was true living on the Rideau, and it's still true over here in the Central Ontario snowbelts off Georgian Bay. November's is another two-sided moon: there's the gold, and the grey, The gold is of a clear day's sun through the last of the golden maple leaves clinging to the branches is clarion, of wetland reeds and cow corn still standing in the now-frosty fields. The grey comes softer than October, creeping softly across lawns and windows and the brown leaves curling on the ground, and as drifting veils of snow blowing in to cover the land in its' first lingering solid coats of white. I love the world's withdrawal into silence - I too, withdraw into myself and listen to inner voices. Snow Moon is white and silver (but also pearl grey and ash and brown) and the nights are long, powdery indigo, mounted by silent owl wings, iolite eyes set in silver frames.

December: Oak Moon

This last moon is curious for me, in that I do not know precisely why I continue to use this name. I like it - it has many associations for me in my Craft - but I guess I haven't thought much about it. Many oak trees do keep some or all of their rich tannin-brown leathery leaves through winter, though, and I do enjoy their song (along with the remnants of the leaves on our ash trees) in the wind... but that's not it. Neither is the whole Oak King/Holly King construct, which I don't really engage with. I have a strong connection with a particular energy, that of an aged, Green Man sage-type spirit that comes with this moon, so perhaps that's part of it as well. I suspect it will always be a bit of a Mystery, which I'm ok with. December's night skies seem curiously leeched of their blue hues, as the nights grow longer, a velvety black glittering blanket. Oak Moon comes dressed in the deep, rich colours of the Earth element - glossy evergreens, rich brown, deepest black, and is redolent of pine and cedar, and the flash of cardinals and blue jays at the bird feeder.

I don't know if any of that is useful, entertaining, or even intelligible. I hope at the very least, it prompts you to think about how you interact with the moons of the year, and the seasons, and how you perceive the world around you.

#lunar calendar #full moons #UPG #witchcraft #musings #personal #seasons #Ontario #i miss living in the country

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sofrpc · 6 years

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⌖*ﾟ— 550+ UNIQUE AND UNDERUSED MALE NAMES

as requested, i have created a masterlist of 550+ unique and underused male names ! these are all listed in alphabetical order, and although i dont claim any of these as my own, please don’t copy and paste straight into another masterlist. feel free to use the names in any way you like, i hope this gives you muse for your characters (my faves are bolded) — also smash that like or reblog if you found this useful, thank you !

abel, acacius, ace, achilles, adagio, adaiah, adalius, adley, adelio, adonis, adrian, adriel, aiden, akello, alain, alarik, alastair, alek, alfred, alfonzo, ali, alisio, alonzo, amari, amedeus, amias, amos, anakin, andre, ansel, anton, anwar, apollo, aragon, aramis, archer, aries, arlo, arrius, artemis, asher, ashton, asriel, atlas, atlantis, atticus, auden, august, auri, austin, avery, axel, aziel

bacchus, baden, bailey, baldwin, balin, balton, bandit, banks, barley, baxley, baxter, baze, bear, beau, beck, benson, bentley, berlin, bianco, bishop, blade, blaine, blaze, bode, bodhie, booker, bosley, boston, brandon, brantley, brayden, braxton, brecken, brennon, brett, briley, brinley, brock, bruno, bronx, brooks, bryce, bryson

caelan, caesar, cade, cador, cage, cain, caleb, callaway, callen, callister, callum, calvin, camden, campbell, carlisle, carlo, carrick, carter, casey, casper, castiel, cedric, cesar, channing, charles, chase, chuck, clifton, clinton, cleon, coen, coleman, colton, crew, cristiano, cooper, corbin, corey, cortez, cravin

dale, dallas, dalton, damari, damian, damon, dane, dante, dario, darius, davon, dax, dean, declan, dedrick, delius, demarcus, demetrius, dennis, denzel, deon, derek, devon, dexter, dillon, dimitri, dion, dolan, dominic, drake, drew, drystan, duke, dwayne, dwight, dyson

eaton, echo, edan, eddison, eden, edrick, eli, eliam, elias, elijah, elio, eliseo, ellis, emilio, emerson, emmett, enoch, enzo, ernest, eros, essex, evan, evian, ezra

fabian, falcon, fallon, farley, felix, fenton, finley, finnick, floyd, flynn, fonso, ford, forester, francisco, franco, freddy, frederick, frodi

gabe, gabriel, gaius, gabin, galvin, gareth, garrick, gaston, gaveel, georgie, gemini, giorgio, glade, gonzalo, gray, gregory, greyson, griffin, grover, gunner, guy

haim, hadden, hadley, hale, hammond, hanan, hanson, harden, harley, harris, hayes, helio, helix, hendrix, hermes, hiram, holden, holland, holmes, houstan, howard, hudson, hugh, hugo, hunter, hyde

iago, ian, icarius, idris, iker, ilario, indigo, isaak, isaiah, israel, ithiel, ives

jace, jadon, jago, jahziel, jairo, jakez, jakobe, jamari, janos, jaron, jasper, javier, jaxon, jayden, jaylon, jaziel, jenson, jeremiah, jermaine, jersey, jett, joaquin, jonas, jose, joss, jovani, joziah, judas, jude, julian, julius, junior, justice

kace, kaden, kael, kairo, kahlil, kai, kaleb, kamden, kanan, karson, kashton, kasper, keenan, keiran, kennedy, keon, kenton, kenzo, keyon, kez, kiah, killian, kingsley, kito, klaus, kobe, koby, kodah, kohen, kolton, kristian, knox, kyan, kynan, kyson

lamar, lamont, lance, landon, laney, larkin, lawyer, lazarus, leandro, lee, legend, lennox, leno, leon, levi, lex, liko, link, locke, loki, loman, lonzo, lorenzo, luca, lucian, lukas, lyam, lynx

mac, machi, macklin, maddox, magnus, maison, major, makeo, malaki, manning, mano, marion, marlon, mars, martez, mathias, maxton, mekhi, meyer, micah, milian, miller, milo, montey, montez, myles

nakos, nasir, nathaniel, neel, neriah, nero, nevada, nicolo, nicklaus, nickolai, nico, nike, nikos, nixon, noah, nolan, norton, nye

oakley, oberyn, obi, obsidian, octavian, oison, olimpio, olsen, omar, ontario, onyx, orion, orlando, oskar, oslo, oryn, otis, oxford, oxley

pablo, paley, palmer, parker, parson, pauly, paxton, pearce, perkin, phelix, phoenix, pierre, pike, podrick, porter, preston, prince, puck

qamar, quinten, quillon, quince

racer, radley, rafael, rafer, ralph, rambo, ramiel, ramone, randall, raven, rayan, reed, reese, rhydian, ricardo, ridley, riker, riley, river, robin, rocco, roderick, roland, roman, romeo, ronan, roni, rowan, royden, rufus, ryder, ryland

sadler, safari, salem, salix, salvador, sami, santiago, sawyer, sean, seaton, severo, shayne, shiloh, silas, silvano, simba, skander, skyler, slade, spencer, spiro, stanley, stefan, syrus

talmon, tane, tanner, tate, tatum, tavis, teddy, terence, theo, theon, tirion, titus, tobias, tommen, tonio, travis, trey, troye, trystan, turner, tyrell, tyrese, tyson

ulan, uri, uriel, urien

vadim, vale, vance, valentine, vaughn, venturo, venus, vermont, vero, victor, vidor, vince, volante, voss

wade, walker, walter, warner, warren, watson, waylan, wayne, wilder, wilson, wilton, wolfgang, wyatt, wynton

xander, xavier, xenos, xylon

yates, york, yuri, yusef

zacharias, zade, zavier, zayn, zed, zeke, zero, zeus, zion

#names masterlist #male names masterlist #name masterlist #masterlist #rph #my masterlist #mine #mine: masterlist

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moderncolors · 5 years

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The Ultimate List of Alternative Baby Names { bohemian, hippie, offbeat, fantasy, goth baby names} So you've got a wee one on the way and you're looking for a name as unique as your new baby is going to be, am I right? Well, check out this great list of offbeat names for I've created just for creative moms and dads-to-be like you. A lot of these names are form lists I made when thinking of names for my two tots and some inspired by my favorite celebrity kid names and some are from the top of my head. Yes, some of these names are "out there" and I've gotten a lot of hateful comments about this post (that's why comments are disabled) but what do you expect from a post called THE ULTIMATE LIST OF ALTERNATIVE BABY NAMES? If you like the names. Awesome! If you don't, that's cool too. To each his own! NOTE: I didn't separate the names by gender as many of these can work for both boys and girls! Last updated 9/28/18 ▲BOHEMIAN & ARTSY▲ Arlo, Allegra, Alto, Ariel, Art, August, Avery, Beau, Bell/Belle, Blue, Burgundy, Cass/ Cassy, Cobalt, Cosette, Cruz, Dali, Dancer, Delia, Delilah, Donatello, Early, Eartha, Flannery, Frida, Golden, Harper, Haven, Hawthorne, Hendrix, Henna, Holden, Holiday, Honor, Hugo, Indigo, Isa, Jazz, Kahlo, Kodak, Langston, Lazareth, Legend, Lennon, Leonardo, Limerick, Lyric, Magenta, Mandala, Mandolin, Marlowe, Merlot, Michelangelo, Monet, Muse, Orlando, Paloma, Pen, Picasso, Piper, Poem, Quinn, Raphael, Red, Rigby, Ringo, Royal, Rufus, Shakespeare, Sonata, Sonnet, Story, Symphony, Tango, Tempo, True/Tru, Truman, Tuesday, Uma, Vellum, Vin/Vino, Xuxa (Shusha),Yoko, Zora amzn_assoc_placement = "adunit0"; amzn_assoc_tracking_id = "mocotw-20"; amzn_assoc_ad_mode = "manual"; amzn_assoc_ad_type = "smart"; amzn_assoc_marketplace = "amazon"; amzn_assoc_region = "US"; amzn_assoc_linkid = "e98f453f5cf9b08a37caad8372b2923c"; amzn_assoc_design = "in_content"; amzn_assoc_asins = "B07HR5SS5B,B079H2V79B,B07GZPGJYW,B072TY48WK,B00OVJJUFM"; amzn_assoc_title = " "; ▲COSMIC▲ Aries, Callisto, Cassiopeia, Celeste, Celestial, Cloud, Comet, Constellation, Cosmic, Cosmo/Cosmos, Earth, Eclipse, Elara, Jupiter, Libra, Luna/Lunar, Mars, Mercury, Moon, Nebula, Nova, Orion, Pluto, Sirius, Solar, Star, Starbright, Stardust, Starlight, Starshine, Vega, Venus amzn_assoc_placement = "adunit0"; amzn_assoc_tracking_id = "mocotw-20"; amzn_assoc_ad_mode = "manual"; amzn_assoc_ad_type = "smart"; amzn_assoc_marketplace = "amazon"; amzn_assoc_region = "US"; amzn_assoc_asins = "B00XQKJGVA,B07FDXY48N,B01DU228AO,B07J1CF5JW"; amzn_assoc_linkid = "c59c0f86e61a2f79d07a89219045df92"; amzn_assoc_design = "in_content"; ▲DESTINATIONS & TRAVEL▲ Africa, America, Asia, Austin, Brooklyn, China, Cairo, Columbia, Dakota, Dallas, Denver, East, Egypt, England, Everest, Geneva, Georgia, Germany, Holland, India, Ireland, Israel, Jordan, Journey, Kenya, London, Morocco, Nazareth, Nevada, Niagara, North, Paris, Odessa, Orient, Peru, Rome/Roman, Russia, Scotland, South, Traveler, Venice, Vienna, Wander, West, Zion, Zanzibar amzn_assoc_placement = "adunit0"; amzn_assoc_tracking_id = "mocotw-20"; amzn_assoc_ad_mode = "manual"; amzn_assoc_ad_type = "smart"; amzn_assoc_marketplace = "amazon"; amzn_assoc_region = "US"; amzn_assoc_asins = "B01ASVCW6K,B00408AA9O,B07KK5DSYF,B07JH8LKPR"; amzn_assoc_linkid = "c59c0f86e61a2f79d07a89219045df92"; amzn_assoc_design = "in_content"; amzn_assoc_title = " "; ▲FANTASY, MYTHOLOGY & SCI-FI▲ Amidala, Anakin, Apollo, Aragorn, Aries, Arwen, Artemis, Aslan, Athena, Atlas, Avalon, Dalek, Data, Elron, Elvin, Eros, Fairy/Faery, Faramir, Freya, Geordi, Gimli, Gulliver, Hera, Hermione, Isis, Jareth, Járnsaxa, Jean-Luc, Jedi, Lando, Leia, Merry, Odin, Oz, Padme, Pan, Persephone, Philomena, Phoenix, Pippen, Pixie, Samwise, Sisko, Sirius, Solo, Sprite, Sulu, Tardis, Thor, Titan, Trillian, Troy, Venus, Xavier, Zeus amzn_assoc_placement = "adunit0"; amzn_assoc_tracking_id = "mocotw-20"; amzn_assoc_ad_mode = "manual"; amzn_assoc_ad_type = "smart"; amzn_assoc_marketplace = "amazon"; amzn_assoc_region = "US"; amzn_assoc_asins = "B075FC488Z,B071Y215TY,B075K5S2DR,B07CG4P4VJ"; amzn_assoc_linkid = "c59c0f86e61a2f79d07a89219045df92"; amzn_assoc_design = "in_content"; amzn_assoc_title = " "; ▲GOTHIC▲ Alabaster, Armand, Ash, Belladonna, Blade, Blaze, Chalice, Cinder, Crimson, Damien, Dante, Draegan, Draven, Echo, Eclipse, Edge, Ember, Enigma, Essence, Eternity, Flame, Gabriel, Garnet, Gossamer, Gotham, Granite, Grimm, Hamlet, Illusion, Jet, Labyrinth, Lace, Lazarus, Lenore, Lestat, Loki, Lore, Lucretia, Maleficent, Maze, Memory, Midnight, Mist, Moonlight, Morrow, Morticia, Mystery, Nightshade, Noir, Obsidian,Onyx, Ophelia, Pandora, Panther, Poe, Porcelain, Prism, Rain, Rapture, Raven, Razor, Requiem, Rogue, Rosary, Sabre, Salem, Satin, Scarlet, Seraphim, Shade, Shadow, Steel, Stone, Storm, Talon, Thorne, Twilight, Veil, Velvet, Winter, Wolf, Zane amzn_assoc_placement = "adunit0"; amzn_assoc_tracking_id = "mocotw-20"; amzn_assoc_ad_mode = "manual"; amzn_assoc_ad_type = "smart"; amzn_assoc_marketplace = "amazon"; amzn_assoc_region = "US"; amzn_assoc_asins = "B01MF8K902,B00I3Q5A4E,B00MMJR8KW,B00NYIADBG"; 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s3lene · 7 years

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Happy Holidays @rispen-hortensie! I made you a fanmix for the @cardcaptor-secret-santa gift exchange. Find the track list and links below (if you want it uploaded somwhere else, just let me know!!)

Loneliness of Time Travel-A Clow Reed Mix

youtube: https://tinyurl.com/y7vomava

playmoss: https://tinyurl.com/y99hefcr

Tracklist: 1. Watching From a Distance-David Ramirez 2. Strange and Beautiful-Aqualung 3. Galileo-Indigo Girls4. From Your Favorite Sky-I Am Kloot5. Blindness-Metric 6. Sentimental Heart-She and Him 7. Hurricane-The Hush Sound 8. Dust to Dust-The Civil Wars 9. Loneliness of Time Travel-Withnailus 10. Immortal-Marina and the Diamonds 11. Weight of the World-Editors 12. Invicible-Muse

(plug for my old fanmixes if you like this one- https://8tracks.com/s3lene )

#rispen-hortensie #cardcaptor-secret-santa #clamp #clow reed #card captor sakura #fanmix #fanmix by s3lene

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riothqs-a · 7 years

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( 1 new message ) from; Office of Alumni Relations to; undisclosed recipients

dear alum, you are cordially invited to the 10-year reunion celebrating the academic year 2017/2018, starting sunday 28 january 2028 at 11PM GMT. please rsvp at your earliest convenience.

the prospect of not being at university might seem foreign to you now, with your eyes almost permanently glued to the pages of your dusty textbooks, but chances are --- in ten years time, you’re not going to be at oxford university anymore. unless you decided to teach here (but, after at least three years of forcing yourself to write an essay two times a week, why would you?) and apart from being an excellent opportunity to get back on campus for a week-end, reunions are good for another reason, too: gossip. who has gotten with who? do any of your (former) classmates have kids? and most importantly; who have messed their lives up the most since receiving their diploma? well, you’re about to find out. fingers crossed that it isn’t you.

general information;

type: dashboard event + task. neither are mandatory, and they do not have to be done in conjunction with one another. you can choose to do both, you can choose to do just the task or just the event, or you can do neither. you’re also welcome to keep your old threads while the event is running. - task 002; you & the future. easy - tell us what your muses’ lives look like in ten years time. it can done any way you wish; a simple paragraph of text, a moodboard, a playlist, a manip. you have full creative control. there is also no length requirement, so feel free to reveal as much (or as little) as you want. - event; takes place over the course of the weekend of the reunion. when: 28 january 2018 (11PM GMT) - 4 february 2018

regarding faceclaims;

while not required, you can pick i secondary older fc to play for your event threads. if you do plan on using a different fc for your character during this time, please let the main know so we can add them to the list. fcs being used for this event will be listed under the cut !!

this is a golden chance to plot with people you’ve yet to plot with, as well as an opportunity to challenge yourself as a writer. also, i am aware that this blurb is a trainwreck, so feel free to shoot me a message if there are things that don’t add up or things you feel need some clarification (i’m sure there are).

ANNA KENDRICK for BAMBI DE LUCA

BLAKE LIVELY for BRIDGET WINDSOR

CRYSTAL REED for ELEANOR WINDSOR

DIANNA AGRON for JACQUELINE SWENSON

EDDIE REDMAYNE for HUGO GRANDET

ELÇIN SANGU for VIVIENNE WESTERLY

KAREN GILLAN for GENEVIEVE WESTERLY

LEIGHTON MEESTER for OCTAVIA GREENE

SOPHIA BUSH for BELLE GRANDET

RACHEL BILSON for INDIGO CARLYLE

EMMY ROSSUM for ALYSSA LORIC

JENSEN ACKLES for OLLIVANDER GREENE

NATALIE PORTMAN for SABRINA BALFOUR

GISELE BÜNDCHEN for ELIZA FITZGERALD

ANDREW GARFIELD for THOMAS GELDOF

SEBASTIAN STAN for HUGO GRANDET

OLIVIA MUNN for MICHAELA HUANG

TOM HIDDLESTON for PERSEUS HARRISON

EZRA MILLER for AGNES BYRNES

OLIVIA WILDE for ASTRID SEYMOUR

RHIAN RAMOS for AIYA AQUINO

TYLER HOECHLIN for REID LORIC

#riotevent #riottask

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leggiamo · 7 years

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Duplicity — Chapter XXVII

Life was quiet. I went to work, I put on a smile for my kids and my coworkers, and at the end of the day, I went home to release the anguish I hid from others. I was waiting for it to get easier, but I wasn’t sure it ever would. I thought that I prepared myself for the moment that it would all end, but evidently, I was nowhere near equipped for the pain.

For something so arbitrary, time has such a funny way of affecting our lives. I waited for it to pass—I needed, just this once, for it to disobey the rules that constrained it and speed up so that this feeling would leave me quicker. I wanted to be able to say that I survived the pain of giving up some of the most important things in my life.

Instead of getting easier, it only seemed to get harder. Days that I spent wondering when the pain would subside accumulated into weeks. Those weeks stacked up into months, and like a relentless downpour, the pain continued to wash over me each time I was alone.

I freed him because he needed to be free. I did the right thing for once and it left me irreparable.

Every night I fell asleep alone, wishing I could reach out and touch the empty space beside me and he would suddenly be there. I missed his scent lingering in the sheets. I missed waking up in the middle of the night and hearing his quiet snores go uninterrupted as I brushed his hair away from his forehead.

Aside from my demonstrations for the children, I found that I could neither sketch nor paint. Like him, my creativity was gone from my life like he was my muse and kept me going. I used to be able to close my eyes and see shapes and colors that I could transfer to a medium. Now, when I closed my eyes, all I saw were shades of grey and amorphous patches of black.

The color had gone from my beloved city as well. Memories projected like apparitions each time I walked the streets and wound up somewhere familiar. Even on the sunniest days, the city felt cold to me as if it were rejecting me. My home no longer welcomed me.

On the first month, I stopped wearing my rings on a chain when I was in public. By the fourth month, I stopped wearing my rings before I went to bed. They were safely tucked away in a jewelry box when I realized the only way it would get easier was if I learned to let go completely. My pity parties would have to stop.

And, so, when October came around, I finally accepted Joan’s offer to join him for a night out. Joan was tall and never let his red beard grow beyond stubble. Something about his slightly crooked front tooth made his smile seem charming yet familiar. I liked him because he was passionate about his work and didn’t try to get a scoop about my highly publicized.

“Oh,” he breathed once the door opened. “Wow.”

I chuckled before biting down on my lip with a smile. “What is it?”

“You are… I thought I had seen beauty in the world before now but I was wrong.”

“Oh, shut up,” I laughed. “I just need to grab a couple of things and I’ll be ready.”

I guided him into the small sitting area I called a living room. It took time to find this cozy little place. After that day, I didn’t move out immediately, which made it so much harder. We danced around each other, leaving rooms the other occupied, sleeping in rooms far apart, claiming different bathrooms.

There was one night, a single night, when things were different. A moment of being drunk off the joy of winning his first league title led to a night of confused complications where we celebrated together, our laughs and jokes genuine and our touches and gazes reminiscent of earlier days.

I looked at the jewelry box on my dresser and sighed before leaving the room. Joan had taken a seat and was scrolling through his phone when I returned.

“All ready.” He looked up from his phone and smiled, which I was happy to reciprocate.

When we made it outside, I raised a surprised brow at the classic import Joan decided to pull up in; I didn’t take him for a car enthusiast. “You like?” he asked when he noticed how I looked around once we were in the car.

“I haven’t been in a classic since…” I swallowed the bitter taste that built up in my mouth. “We pulled off in an E-Type on my wedding day,” I laughed through the pang of the recollection.

Joan cast a sad glance in my direction before turning back to the road. He lightened the mood with many years worth of jokes and amusing stories as he weaved through the streets. I enjoyed listening to him as the still warm air scented with the sea breeze blew through the open windows.

Joan’s tales only continued between moments of getting to know more about me as we sat across from each other. Conversing with him throughout dinner was effortless. For that moment while we ate and conversed, I didn’t feel like my world was collapsing.

Our conversation lulled as Joan picked at what was left on his plate and I reached for my drink. I watched a quintet of men carrying instrument cases meander through the tables as I took slow sips of the basil and rum-infused punch. The straw fell from my lips as I watched curiously as they set up on a small stage in the back of the dining room. Other patrons also seemed to be interested as the leader plucked his reed from his mouth to introduce himself and the quartet behind him.

“Thought you might like enjoy this,” said Joan right as the emcee played a riff on his saxophone.

A slight smile upturned my lips as I listened to the band play swing covers of modern songs, as well as original pieces, livening the atmosphere of the dining room.

The marriage of the piano and drums to the bass, brass, and woodwind left me fidgeting in my seat. My toe tapped in time with the infectious rhythms as the music flowed through me. I heard Joan chuckle as he wiped his sip of beer from his upper lip.

He spoke over the music, “Looks like you want to dance.” His raise of an accusatory brow wrinkled his forehead.

“If you get tequila in my system I just might.”

“Now, Ms. Indigo, that sounds like something that might get me into trouble,” he chuckled.

“Only if you let it, Mister Joan.” I dragged out ‘Mister Joan’ and pressed my elbows onto the table, leaning in just a little closer. “Besides, a bit of trouble might be fun.”

I winked as I stood from my seat and sauntered off to the find the toilets. I hadn’t realized I was smiling until I took a look at myself in the mirror as I washed my hands. It was hard to remember the last time I genuinely laughed or enjoyed myself in the way I had been tonight. There was a war brewing in the back of my mind, however, as I tried to stop myself from comparing this to my first date with Cesc. I had to remind myself that this wasn’t the same; this was genuinely two people enjoying a friendly night out.

I wasn’t ready to put myself out there like that again. It was much too soon.

Before leaving, I did a bit of primping just to touch up what was wiped away while I ate and to boost my confidence. When I pulled open the dark wood door, my smile fell from my face.

Everything around me faded away including the music, which gradually became quieter as if I was walking further away from its source. All the pain, all of my memories—everything I had been fighting to push aside for tonight came rushing back to me. I suddenly felt too hot, too exposed, as the small hallway began to blur as vertigo sent the world violently spinning around me.

Suddenly, going out had become a mistake.

It was all there, written on his face for the quickest of moments before it was gone. The sound of my name coming from his mouth was too much to handle.

“—I thought that was you—”

I remained paralyzed as I stared at him leaning against the wall, his mouth moving but none of the words making sense. My trance was broken when someone walked between us, and I used the interruption to escape him and everything that I saw tucked away in his blues. I was sure that I heard him call my name again, but I didn’t stop; I had to get back to the table and hope that my smile was convincing enough so Joan wouldn’t probe for information.

“Got you that tequila.” He pointed to a salt-rimmed double shot glass sitting on a small square plate.

My heart was still racing as I sat down and reached for the glass. Joan watched in wonderment as I downed the entire shot. I could feel the burn of the alcohol tear at my throat as it traveled downward and warmed my chest. I wagged my head and looked out at some of the people that had gotten up to dance.

I forced a laugh. “I’m ready to dance now. As long as you can keep up, of course.”

His hand covered his heart. “Did you just imply that the music teacher couldn’t keep up?”

I laughed more genuinely but it was still rather weak. After a quick, final swig of his drink, Joan stood and held his hand out for me to take so that he could lead me out to a clearing in the room and make me back up my words.

Unsurprisingly, he kept up with me and showed me some moves that I hadn’t known. I got a good look at the pretty shade of green in his eyes when he pulled me back into him after twirling me outward. Dancing with him actually made me laugh out loud as I enjoyed myself.

“This is perfect,” I uttered as we swayed, catching our breaths, during a break in the music. “I should’ve known you’d take me to a jazz bar.”

His smile was pearly white. “What can I say? I’m a bit of a classic man. And I might have wanted to show you off just a little bit.”

My face felt flush when I remembered that only a few other couples were dancing along with us, but I continued trying to dance it away. The rest of my surroundings became blurred as we did spins and turns and rapid footwork. At one point, our foreheads briefly touched as I wrapped my leg around his thigh and leaned into his hand as I dipped.

“That tequila works wonders on you, I see,” he chuckled as I came back up.

I closed my eyes and exhaled through my nose as our foreheads touched again. “I haven’t had a night out like this in ages. I’m just enjoying myself.”

“I can definitely see that. I’m enjoying you enjoying yourself.”

We both laughed and I let my eyes flutter open. Our movements were still at our own pace, set apart from everyone else. Dancing became something else, something a little more intimate but not necessarily romantic or sexual. It was something between two people who were trying to get to know each other better without any real end goal. I wanted to be free for just one night and this was helping.

“You mind letting a pretty little lady like myself crash at yours?”

His brow lifted. “I don’t usually take strange women home.”

“So I’m a strange woman now?”

He lifted his hand and brought his thumb and index finger so close together that they were almost touching. “Just a little.” He licked his lips and smiled. “So, you want to see my place so soon?”

“Why not? We’re both consenting adults, aren’t we?” He laughed at something he saw behind me—a surprised face, I assumed—as he placed his hands on my hips and guided them in snaking motions. “You don’t wanna cuddle with me?” I teased.

“Hmm… not sure about that one.” His voice was soft in my ear.

“Oh, please.” I pressed closer to him. “I know you’ve been dreaming about it since I started working at the center.”

He gripped me tighter and moved with me. “I’ve had plenty of dreams but none of them actually involved cuddling.”

“Oh, ho ho,” I laughed scandalously. “Are classic men allowed to be so naughty?”

I looked over Joan’s shoulder before he pulled me back in after spinning away from me. I couldn’t stop myself.

He was at a table in the distance, staring out over the petite body of a blonde sitting across from him, facing away from me. As we stared at each other, I wondered how long he had been watching. I felt that ache but I couldn’t look away, and now that he knew I saw him watching, neither could he.

Joan spun us around, breaking me free of the trance that I was in. I could still feel him staring at me, taking in the view of my backside as I moved with the music.

“So is a sleepover out of the question or not?”

My partner wet his lips. “Are you the one having trouble keeping up now? Two more songs and I’ll give you the grand tour of my place.”

A flash of a smile spread across his face when I agreed to let him flaunt me and his move through two more songs. When our performance was up, we returned to the table so he could pay and to grab our things. When we were all sorted, I followed close behind as he led the way out, my smile gradually fading. Once we were outside, I stood off to the side and waited for Joan to bring the car around.

“Indigo.” I heard his voice again. I shook my head and refused to turn around. “Indi,” he called softly.

I bit down on my lip at the first sign of the slightest tremble. My chest felt tight, an all too familiar feeling I’d been experiencing for months.

“You’re just going to ignore me, then?”

I turned my head and caught his silhouette in my periphery. “Gerard—”

“He misses you, Indi.”

My mouth went dry. “You miss me or he misses me?”

“I’m trying to move on—” He looked around. “Are you seeing that guy now?”

“What do you want Gerard?” I faced him completely, unable to contain the myriad emotions running through me. “Why—”

He pulled me out of view, into the shadows of the restaurant, away from probing eyes. I wanted to collapse and cry out. I wanted to push him away and fight him off, but I simply slumped in his arms, the joy that I was feeling earlier quickly escaping me.

“Gerard,” I whimpered. His shirt wrinkled in my grip and he said nothing, he did nothing, as I continued to whimper . “Why didn’t you just let me leave? Go back inside with whoever—”

“He misses you—fuck, you already know that I miss you but I can’t—” He pressed his lips together and looked above me, scanning the area around us. “A bunch of us went out and you already know he can’t hold a drink,” he sighed. “He must’ve forgotten… he told me that you just up and disappeared—”

“I did what?”

He shrugged. “He said you were gone when he woke up in the morning. You left without saying anything.”

I scoffed and shook my head. Why would he say it like I abandoned him?

“I ended our marriage. I had to—”

He ran his hand up and down my back, something that was still so comforting despite our time apart and despite all the pain that I felt.

“It doesn’t matter. He just told me that you left. He woke up and you were gone with barely anything but some signed divorce papers left behind. I never expected you to leave—” He breathed a laugh then bit down on his lip and furrowed his brows. He looked down at me before cautiously continuing, “He told me about the women—some of them. He’s not the same, Indi. He’s different. He mentioned your name once and his eyes just—he needs to see you.”

I shook my head. I couldn’t get the image of him and another woman—other women—together. He was doing all that he could in order to get over me and I was afraid it was breaking him. It was turning him into something that he wasn’t and I didn’t know what to do.

We couldn’t be together again; he deserved a real chance at happiness with someone who wouldn’t take him for granted. I was afraid that seeing him would break me, but most of all I was afraid that it would break him all over again.

“We need to be apart in order to heal. You’re ruining that—”

“I’m sorry.” He held me at an arm's length and used his thumb to wipe my cheek dry. “I just saw you in there and I felt something—”

I looked away from him as I reached into my clutch for my vibrating phone. “Hey.”

“Uh, are you okay? Where’d you wander off to?” he asked worriedly.

“Sorry, I’ll be over in just a second.”

I ended the call and finally looked Gerard in the face. There was a blatant sadness in his eyes and a distant look of longing hidden amongst that sea of blue. A pang somewhere deep inside me forced me to look away.

“I have to go.”

“Remember what I said, Indigo,” he called as I walked away.

Joan was sitting in his car waiting for me. A look of relief washed over his face when he realized I was the one knocking on his window. He was all smiles as I settled into the passenger’s seat.

“Everything okay?” he asked carefully.

I nodded. “Of course.”

He opened his mouth but paused for a moment. His eyes flickered to the side and then back to me. “Are you sure? I just couldn’t help but notice that Gerard Piqué is standing out there looking like he wants to walk over here and say some very intense words to me.”

“Don’t worry about it,” I said quickly. “Just drive, please.”

He frowned and nodded. “As you wish.”

Gerard and I watched one another as Joan pulled away. I didn’t know what I expected or even wanted to happen once I reached Joan’s, but I knew that I needed just one moment to try and subdue what I was feeling.

I woke up beside Joan, his arm around my waist, the both of us atop his covers and fully clothed. He is as good a listener as he is a cuddler.

The entire mood of our night shifted once we were in his car. Flirting ceased and joking didn’t happen; a word barely passed between us until we were sitting in his kitchen drinking cups of coffee. He opened up first about his girlfriend of four years leaving him out of the blue. I told him Gerard and I go back a ways and that he was trying to act as a lone liaison between me and my ex. Naturally, Joan recognized that my ex was Cesc, but he made no comments.

I sighed and patted the back of Joan’s hand before pulling his arm off of me and sliding off the bed. I sought out the bathroom, and when I was done, I trekked back to the kitchen to pick up my phone. I didn’t really expect to see many notifications, but what I especially didn’t expect to see was a missed call and voicemail from Cesc.

It had to be pure coincidence.

I was willing to think that it was a mistake, a misdial, but once my shaky fingers were able to find my voice mailbox, I saw the message was much too long to just have been a mistake.

I sat down and pressed play before bringing my phone up to my face. My heartbeat was in my ears as I heard nothing but silence. After a few seconds, there was movement and then there he was.

“Hey—” The sound of his voice, so scratchy from a lack of sleep made my heart race. Every inch, every single tiny molecule that made up my existence missed hearing his voice and yearned for him in that moment. “I, um, I know it’s late. I know we haven’t spoken in so long but I... I don’t know. I just had an urge to call you. I’ve had it for a while but I never found the nerve until now.

“You’re probably sleeping, or you just watched this ring because you couldn’t or—or you didn’t want to answer and I don’t blame you for that. I guess I was just hoping to hear your voice even though I probably wouldn’t have had anything to say, so this is probably for the best, isn’t it?

“You don’t have to call me back. To be honest with you, I probably won’t pick up anyway. I couldn’t pick up. There’s been so much going on that I just—I guess I just miss you even though I really shouldn’t—” There was a long pause and a muffled sniffling noise. It was faint but I could hear him curse to himself. “I’ll be signing those papers for you. I wish you—”

He reached the time limit and probably didn’t even feel bothered to call again and continue what he had to say in another message. This one was more than enough for him; it was more than he could handle.

I was shaking by the time I set my phone back down on the table. I wanted to know what he was trying to say, but I was afraid to call him back. He didn’t sound it, but he must have been drunk. There was no other explanation for him deciding to call me out of the blue. Him having one drink too many was especially more plausible than him reaching out because Gerard told him that he saw me.

I stared off into space for a while, fully aware of each tear that I shed. Something he said just wouldn’t stop repeating in my head. After all this time, he still hadn’t signed the divorce papers that I left for him. He had them and held onto them for what reason? I left my signature so that he could move the process along and be rid of me, but he hadn’t done anything with them. What was he waiting for?

I hiccupped and sniffled quietly as I picked my phone up again and found my call history. My thumb hovered above his name and I almost pressed it. Ultimately, I couldn’t bring myself to call him.

It didn’t matter what Gerard said; Cesc needed the distance. Being apart from me was the best thing for him. He deserved happiness and freedom and so much more than to love an unfaithful joke of a woman.

I turned my phone off altogether and returned to Joan’s room to find him still fast asleep. It felt strange as I crawled back to him and wrapped his arm around me, but for the moment, it made me feel safe; It made it all go away.

“You okay?” he asked sleepily.

“Yeah, go back to sleep. I’m fine.”

I wasn’t fine, but he didn’t need to know that. I closed my eyes and struggled to find sleep again. After struggling for five minutes, I turned around and snuggled in closer to Joan, hoping the comfort of being this close to another person would help me just the slightest bit.

Joan cleared his throat and sleepily asked, “You want to talk about it?”

I blinked as I considered talking it out. The t-shirt that he changed into sometime during the night felt soft against my forehead as I kept it pressed against his chest. He still smelled slightly of the cologne he wore and the combination of it and being this close to him calmed me. It felt as if we had known each other all along.

“My ex called me,” I whispered.

“Oh.” He tried his best to embrace me, which meant pressing me against him and squeezing me with the arm he had draped over me. “What did he say?”

I closed my eyes. His voice was still clear as day.

“He misses me. He called just because he had the urge to. Until now, he hadn’t even signed the divorce papers.”

“Shit,” Joan remarked. Just one word fully conveyed his sympathy and surprise. He needn’t say anything more.

I nodded. “I want to believe that he was drunk leaving me a drunk message, but when he’s drunk he speaks in fragments. Those were all complete sentences that came from somewhere full of pain. When does it get easier?”

I rested my hand on his chest, my fingers clawed as I ran them over the fabric covering his skin. He paused as he mulled over his answer, leaving a quietness to settle that was only penetrated by the sound of his gentle breaths. Before he opened his mouth, his Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed.

“Honestly? I don’t know. For me, once that second or third month hit, I missed her a little less and less each day. That was only because I turned that hurt into anger. I thought that if I could be angry then I would be getting over it. I wasn’t. I still thought of her every time a song she loved played, or when I would do something that she used to scold me for like burp loudly.

“I realized that being angry was just another form of hurt that I didn’t let go of until like the sixth month. It might have been earlier than that, but that was when I walked into your classroom for the first time to observe you and I realized that she was no longer on my mind. How could I possibly allow myself to stay hung up on someone who clearly wasn’t meant for me when someone like you exists?”

I laughed, though I didn’t feel uplifted. “You really know how to ruin a moment, don’t you?”

“It made you laugh though, didn’t it?” he chuckled. “So, are you going to call him?”

“I shouldn’t—”

“Look—” He made sure to back away just enough so that he could move his arm and place a finger under my chin. The touch was enough to make me angle my head so that we could see each other’s faces; a comforting smile softened his. “—it’s really not my place, but we’re already here so I might as well. I don’t know the full details and I don’t need to, but if what you’re doing right now isn’t working for either of you, maybe it’s time to try something else to get that closure you need. He called you for a reason so find out what that reason was.”

I stared at his lips as he spoke because I didn’t want him to see the vulnerability in my eyes. He could probably still see it written all over my face anyway. I wanted to be able to let go, but something in me was still holding on as tightly as it could.

“Why do I feel like I’ve known you forever?” I muttered more to myself than to him.

“Maybe we’re actually soulmates finally reunited in this life,” he said in jest.

My eyes closed as I smiled and let my head rest against his chest once more. There was a time when I entertained the idea of my soulmate being out there, and I truly thought I had found mine until I realized that I was wrong.

#duplicity #still chugging along

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