#''Stan surprises two villainous Gucks with snickerdoodles''

[thelastspeecher]

Super hero au, baking, After discovering his ability to manipulate flames, Stanley decides to abuse this power by baking the cakes his mother used to make when he was younger. And as it turned out, criminals are less likely to mug people in dark alleys if they're given free food. So now Stan is fighting crime both with and without his mask!

🍰 - baking

In what has become a very obvious pattern, I didn’t completely follow your suggestion nor baking prompt.  Technically, it’s related, and inspired by both those things.  Also, I decided to set this in the Superhero AU where Angie’s a supervillain named Sirocco, bc that was what I got inspired for.  Anyways, hope you like it!

Send in an emoji and I’ll write a ficlet!

              Stan groaned silentlyto himself.

              I hate going to the bank.  Ialways get stuck behind some moldy oldie who insists on paying their bills orwhatever with pennies.  Currently, hehad been waiting for fifteen minutes, and was still at the back of theline.  Stan sighed and looked around thequiet, calm bank.  Man, what I wouldn’t give for a distraction.  Somethin’ to keep me from dying of boredom.

              Crash!  Stan instinctivelyducked at the sound of a glass breaking.

              What the hell happened?

              “All right,everybody on the ground, now!” a voice shouted. Stan’s eyes widened; the voice sounded familiar.  He turned around.  Standing proudly in front of the broken glassdoors was his archnemesis, the supervillainess named Sirocco.

              Fuck!  I don’t have my heroingduds on me.  And even if I did, I wouldn’tbe able to mask up without everyone here seeing.  Stan subtly pressed the “SOS” button on hissquad communicator, kept in his back pocket. Hopefully someone can show upbefore Sirocco takes all my dough.

              “Hey, you!” Siroccosaid, noticing him.

              “Uh, me?” Stanasked.

              “Yeah.  Why aren’t you on the floor?”

              “There’s kinda glasseverywhere,” Stan pointed out.  Siroccostormed over to him.  Stan stood stockstill as she stared directly into his face.

              Shit, shit, shit.  What if sherecognizes me?  Sure, she’s never seen mewithout my mask.  But Shermie recognizedme before I even had a chance to introduce myself as Flamethrower.  Sirocco frowned at him.  Something akin to recognition flashed in herblue eyes.  Stan swallowed nervously.  After a moment, Sirocco took a step back fromhim.

              “You seem familiar, stranger,”she said.  

              “I, uh, I hear thata lot.”

              “Hmm.”  Sirocco looked him up and down.  “Don’t know if I buy that, but whatever.”  She began to make her way to the teller.

              “Hey!” Stan blurtedout impulsively.  Sirocco spunaround.  A hot wind picked up in the banklobby.

              “Are you reallygoing to try my patience?  You know who Iam, right?” Sirocco demanded.

              “Yeah.  You’re one of the Twister Twins.”

              “That I am.  I’m a supervillain.  You don’t want to mess with me.”

              “Okay, yeah, yeah,”Stan said, his mind working furiously to come up with a solution that didn’tinvolve revealing his secret identity to everyone at his bank.  “But…maybe you could, I dunno, not…steal ourmoney?”  Sirocco cracked a half-smile.

              “Heh.”  She sounded genuinely amused.  “You’ve got guts.  But what could you offer me that’s betterthan a bunch of money?”  Stan looked at hisbag.  He didn’t really have anything onhim, except for…

              “Homemadesnickerdoodles,” Stan said.  Heimmediately squeezed his eyes shut.

              Fuck, shit, damn! That was a mistake!

              “Homemade…snickerdoodles?”Sirocco said.  Stan opened his eyes.  Sirocco was completely taken off guard.  She stared at him in confusion.  “What- why would ya offer somethin’ likethat?”

              Hold on, Sirocco has a southern accent? She must cover it up normally. Sirocco’s eyes widened as she realized that she had let her accentslip.  She cleared her throat loudly.

              “Those must be the bestcookies in the world,” she said.

              Aaaand the accent’s gone.

              “Nah, I mean, I made‘em.  I dunno if they’re the best in theworld.”

              “You made them?  You don’t look like the type.”

              “Yeah, but, I, uh, Iam.”  Stan opted to not tell her that thereason he was into baking was due to his heat and fire-related abilities.  Sirocco chuckled softly.

              “You’re aninteresting person, Mr…?”

              “I’d rather not say,”Stan said.  Sirocco raised an eyebrow athim.

              “Oh?”

              Was that the wrong thing to do? Sirocco stared at him for a moment. She nodded, marched back to him, and held her hand out.

              “You amused me, stranger,” she said, emphasizing thelast word.

              Oh, no.  That can’t be good.

              “Give me thosesnickerdoodles, and I’ll be on my way.”

              “Wait, really?”

              “Really.”  Sirocco smiled charmingly at him.

              She definitely knows something. Stan rummaged around in his bag and pulled out the plastic containerwith the snickerdoodles he had planned on bringing to Shermie.  I canalways make more.  He handed her thecookies.

              “Thanks,” Sirocco chirped.  She winked at him, then turned on her heeland exited the bank, stepping daintily through the broken glass doors.  Stan stared after her, dumbstruck.

              How the fuck did that work?

----- 

Six Months Later

              Stan landed at thebrawl just as it was ending.  He huffedand shut off his flames.

              Great, missed another fight. He looked around.  Most of themasks involved had dispersed already, but he caught a glimpse of one of theTwister Twins ducking into an alley.  He ranafter the supervillain.

              “Hey, Tsunami!” Stancalled.  The male Twister Twin froze.  “I know that’s your codename.”  Tsunami, the Twister Twin, spun around.

              “How do you know that?” Tsunami snarled,marching over to him.

              “Sirocco told me,”Stan answered.  Tsunami’s eyes widened.

              Huh.  Gray, notblue like Sirocco.

              “Wha- you know her codename too?  What’s going on with you and my sister, huh,Flamethrower?”  

              “It’s…complicated,”Stan managed.  Tsunami scowled.

              “That’s not goodenough.  Look, buddy, Sirocco might be mytwin, but she’s younger ‘n me.  So thatmeans she’s my baby sister.  I don’t likewhatever weird thing is goin’ on with her and some hero.”  Tsunami was getting upset to the point thathis accent was starting to slip.

              Pretty sure he’d kill me if I told him that we’vehooked up twice.  Masks on, yeah, butstill.  If he’s the older twin…

              “I don’t think you wannaknow the details,” Stan said quietly.  Tsunamifrowned at him, confused.

              “What does-”  Tsunami cut himself off and took a stepback.  “Oh.  Oh, no. No.”

              “Uh…surprise?” Stansaid.  Tsunami slammed a fist against oneof the brick walls of the alley.

              “Consarnit!  No wonder she told me to go easy on ya!”  Tsunami glared at Stan.

              If looks could kill, I’d be six feet under rightnow.  Damn.  This seems like an overreaction to finding outyour sister has an active sex life.

              “Whattaya want,Flamethrower?  Spit it out, so that I cango home and talk to my sister about this,” Tsunami spat.

              “I just- I made hersome cookies.”  Tsunami stared at him.

              “…What?”

              “I, uh, I haven’tseen her robbing banks for a while.  Ipoked around, heard that she’s on some kinda sick leave?”

              “You could call itthat,” Tsunami muttered.

              “And, uh, I mean- yeah,we’re archenemies or whatever, but…I like to think I’m getting through toher.  And even if we punch each other inthe face all the time, doesn’t mean I want her to be so sick that she’s gottatake months off.”

              “Yeah, that soundslike a ‘hero’ thing to do.  ‘Speciallysince ya have a…thing goin’ on.”  Tsunamirolled his eyes.  “Hand ‘em over, BoyScout.”

              “I’m not a Boy Scout,”Stan said, digging the small package of cookies he had stashed out of hispocket.  He gave the cookies toTsunami.  “Pretty damn far from it,actually.”

              “Hmph.”  Tsunami frowned at the cookies.  “These aren’t goin’ to poison An- Sirocco orsomethin’, are they?”

              Wait.  Did healmost slip up on his sister’s name?  Hemust be really putoff by all this.

              “No, they’re normalsnickerdoodles,” Stan said.  Tsunamisighed.

              “I’ll test ‘em justto make sure.”  Tsunami turnedaround.  “Thanks or whatever.”

              “Yeah, no- noproblem,” Stan said.  His heart wasracing.

              I knew I shouldn’t have hooked up with Sirocco.  I caught feelings for her, and she’s agoddamn supervillain.  Stan watchedTsunami walk away.  A sick supervillain.  Really sick.  For three months.  Stan frowned. Yeah, three months.  About a month after we did it the secondtime.  Eh, more like six weeks after thathookup.  Stan turned around and beganto walk away.  He froze, rememberingsomething.  Hang on, didn’t Shermie say something aboutsix weeks, when they had that “surprise” kid?  Ice suddenly filled Stan’s veins.  Itusually takes about six weeks for someone to realize…

              “Shit,” Stanwhispered.

              Tsunami was angry about more thanjust his sister hooking up with me.