#'died for your sins' which honestly might as well be the most honest and direct way of yall saying that you were on the side of the romans

[snekdood]

that post about "the only good jew is a dead jew" in regards to jesus specifically is so fuckin real. the only way christians will accept anything about their beliefs stemming from judaism and worship any of the people mentioned is if they die horribly at the hands of romans. its almost like a subtle indirect threat, or a dogwhistle even- the imagery they worship is of a dead jewish man on a cross, and then i can imagine them opening their eyes after prayer, smiling, and looking directly at their jewish friend, almost as a way to be like "if you step out of line, you're next".

[belphegorbillickin]

Honestly, I love Mammon but I'm sick of his sweetness. I see him EVERYWHERE, and it's like the others don't exist. I like it when characters lose their calm you know? Esp that time when we reject Satan's pact, I really liked how he got worked up over such a thing lmao. And of course, most of the ones who tried killing mc had stupid reasons, except for Lucifer imo, but since when did demons make sense?

Alright, sure, they can still be sweet, but imagine if they ACTUALLY were dark characters. Corrupting human souls, selfish desires, blah blah. I'm not saying they can't love mc, ofc they can be sweet and lovable, but that doesn't mean they'd lose their normal habits and quirks. You cannot differentiate between them and normal humans now. The traits that would portray them as demons isn't there.

And perhaps yes, routes would've been fun. Right/wrong answers? Seems legit lmao. But like you said, the characters could've been done so much better.

I liked them at the start, now that I think of it asmo was never really what he seemed to be at the start, but in the recent events to me, at least, he's all but that. Diavolo, Barbatos, they have potential to be dark characters lmao. Asmo too, esp abt Helene, he sure was manipulative. Seeing Satan just be about cats/books upsets me bcuz he's one of my favs, and like you said, I feel he could've been a MUCH better character, plus idk he seems like he could be dark too. Other than beel & mammon, and I really don't know about belphie since he's become pretty sweet now, I feel everyone else could be written as characters with darker, more fitting demon personalities.

Though I love how we can go on about one topic for ages lmao. Lmk if my rambles become too annoying lol – 🍹

Don't worry about it, I really enjoy talking about it and I'm the queen of rambling lol. It's actually kinda hard for me to be concise when it comes to things like this.

And yes! Satan's reaction to rejection was exactly what I was thinking about when I mentioned that. I don't doubt most of the others would've reacted the same either tbh, but the difference between his reason for wanting to kill MC and his brothers' felt very different imo.

I'm kinda repeating myself, but I think people really overlook how cold Asmo was regarding getting MC killed. In that sense I can see how they get along with each other so well. I think I huge part of that is people coming in knowing that they're all gonna love MC and MC can't die so they don't even think about threats or subtle manipulation, but he's one of the most malicious imo since it was so cool-headed and planned.

Kind of like the theories about Barbatos and/or Diavolo purposefully sending you to a traumatic death because executing Belphie would cause the brothers to revolt. (Which I believe to extent btw.) Those four stand out as a lot more demonic imo because they can't be called crimes of passion. I miss the days where they both just casually admitted to taking part in a torture dungeon.

Personally I love the idea of unavoidable demonic corruption. Like the "tragic lovers suffering from fate" trope but where the demon isn't just an innocent victim that can't control it at all and MC doesn't just take it happily without consequences.

I'm not against MC suffering the consequences of a demon boyfriend, far from it, but even if you don't go the direct route there's so many ways to do it.

Even just slowly losing your morals because all the demons (and old-ass human with some most likely odd moral quirks, if only from being alive so long in horrible times) around you treat horrible things as something as mundane as breathing. Even if they snap back at least acknowledging it is a huge step up.

I'd be terrified and paranoid 24/7 knowing everyone around me wants to literally eat me and has eaten humans before. Even if they hated the taste or something knowing they're capable of it is scary af.

Like a Beelzebub who truly doesn't mean to hurt MC but doesn't think twice about breaking their beloved pet's bones right in front of them. A Beelzebub that finds it just as hard to avoid eating humans as he did in the intro even when he knows he shouldn't harm MC's family.

Or even just a Beelzebub so wracked by guilt and light on morals that can't bring himself to not always enthusiastically take Belphie's side even when he knows it's hurting MC. A kind of parasitic relationship where Beel guilts MC into staying and helps Belphie trap & manipulate them in ways Belphie could never do by himself.

A Leviathan that finds it increasingly hard to keep his jealously inwards now that he has someone to fight for and can't feel secure unless he can feel their envy. A Belphegor that slowly manipulates MC into abandoning all of their responsibilities and friends until their life is ruined and they have to depend on him.

I get that some of them are a bit harder to do without reminding people of irl abuse they may have faced, namely Satan, Levi, Lucifer, and ofc Asmo, but there are ways to make it more supernatural and less mundane. Besides there are way, way worse otomes out there that don't even market themselves as dark like Obey Me did.

I find it interesting that so much of the fanbase absolutely hates those kind of themes when they're so hard to avoid in otome and it was kind marketed towards people who like it. Like I genuinely wonder how they heard about it and got through demons insulting & trying to kill them in the early days of Obey Me before you knew they got better.

In the end though none of that can really happen without routes imo. Those kind of storylines can't be done well in the 10 seconds of individual interaction we get, even a whole lesson is too little time. And again even people who like darker things might freak out when Asmo's the one doing it or get turned off by Levi so they won't risk their money. It's so frustrating seeing the lost potential and knowing it's probably never gonna happen.

Speaking of I always thought Mammon was pretty robbed too. Not only did he never have the same freedom to harm MC as the others, but he was also directly responsible for their safety. Like sure they'd all be punished, but you have a different mindset when an authority figure constantly makes you aware and you have more chances to bond.

I think even cannon Mammon would've been more dangerous and a lot more rude if he wasn't their babysitter. The others, except Satan & Belphie ofc, probably would've been "nicer" and more controlled knowing Lucifer was breathing down their neck too imo.

Like he does seem less violent and hot-headed than the others, but they're not the same circumstances. Even a while after the pact he'd probably sell MC in an instant if he knew he wasn't going to be severely punished.

A lot of his possessiveness feels like a dog guarding a bone rather than true jealously imo, even when they're doing it as endearing thing. People automatically assuming he was lying when he said he'd rather MC die than be saved by someone else, but was he really at that point? Just because someone is tsundere at times doesn't mean they're incapable of being honest or not that into someone.

That's also kinda what I meant by infatuation too. Like sure they could like a human, but that doesn't mean they'll be that upset when they die or will never get bored. It's kind of like those people that immediately get a new pet after theirs dies, or even before so they don't have to be without a dog for a single second. Or the kind of demon that wants to "ruin" you with their sin until you can't go on as the ultimate act of love, even though they know it'll kill you.

[cosmic-navel-gazin]

This is something a bit different from me, but in light of the recent announcement from Ubisoft that there’s going to be a remake of Prince of Persia: Sands of Time coming out in January 2021, I thought I’d share some thoughts.

(This started out small but got outta hand so super long post incoming, no spoilers for the games)

So first off, a bit of my history with the original game.

 I’m a big fan of the Prince of Persia (PoP) franchise, and I’ll fully admit that nostalgia plays a big part in it. You see, in many ways this 2003 classic was my real entryway drug into the world of videogames.

It wasn’t the first videogame I had ever played. My friends had consoles, there were some games on the school computers, but I didn’t own games as a kid. As far as my parents were concerned, these were all the spoils and soul damning devices of Lucifer himself. You know how it is, every generation goes through this thing of blaming all the world’s problems on a new artform: rock and roll, comic books and then videogames.

So yeah, a gaming console or buying games for the home computer was a BIG NO-NO! 

But of course, the more an authority figure says you can’t have something, the more you want and crave it. It was only a matter of time until the opportunity presented itself to me.

And then the day finally came.

It was just me and a couple of friends, going to this new magazine store near the school. And there it was: the dvd case that came with a gaming mag for like 5 euros if I remember correctly, stupid cheap for such a great game. 

There was doubt, there was fear, there was anxiety. I didn’t know much about the game, only the old 1989 DOS Prince of Persia:

This had the same name but looked different. I was seduced immediately.

The case stared longingly at me:

 It’s not my fault, I was bewitched and I bought it.

My symbol of rebellion, my first big transgression, and my first real treasured posession that I bought with hard earned money.

PoP:The Sands of Time was my original sin so to say:

Accurate representation of what happened that day

I furiously installed the game as soon as my parents left the house. Played it for a couple of hours and stood in awe at the thing - the cinematics, the cool parkour moves, the arabian nights setting, the time manipulation to undo mistakes when platforming or in combat, the Prince breaking the fourth wall saying:”no no no, that’s not what happened, let me start over” whenever I died and got a game over…

You have not experienced true fear if at some point in your life you didn’t feel the cold sweat running down your back as you hear the very distinct sound of your parents’ car arriving when you’re doing something “prohibited”.

 As soon as I heard that sound, I quickly quit the game, uninstaled it (I could not run the risk of them finding out I had tainted their machine with a videogame *gasp!*), and ran to my room to hide the game before opening the door for them. 

Neetheless to say, I never made much progress since I had to start over every time after quitting and uninstalling the thing. I would just play those first couple of hours over and over, never knowing how the story progressed, but I was happy all the same. At one point I knew every line of dialogue, every music cue, every sound effect of that beginning part. It would be some years before I got my first laptop and finally managed to complete it. 

All of this to say that the game means a lot to me. Not just as a product or piece of entertainment. This wasn’t casually playing on someone’s gameboy advance or PS2 to have a bit of fun and pass the time.

 This was more intimate.

 It was just me; the game; a dark room and a blanket; and a sincere and charming, simple but compelling story told seamlessly through mechanics that only enhanced it. This was me witnessing gameplay and storytelling going hand in hand in a way that even many of my other favourite games don’t do, or don’t do as well (there’s usually some disconnect where a game only manages to really excel at one but not the other).

Ok, so on the announcement and trailer:

As a big fan you might think I was super hyped for this. 

But I gotta say…no, not really.

I’m not super angry, but I’m not really excited either honestly. And I don’t think it’s just the rough and uncanny character models and animation that people are pointing out all over (although that doesn’t help).

I guess to talk a bit on that, I should stress out that my problem isn’t that it doesn’t look realistic enough. To be honest, and this is going to sound rich from a big Witcher 3 fan, I think that the gaming industry overall, moreso big tripple A titles, seem to have this unhealthy obsession with photorealism. Like, I don’t need to see the characters’s pores to care about these polygon people. Strong art direction is what I feel is more valuable. I just don’t think this arms race to photorealism is sustainable. Games are taking longer to make and fund, and I’d rather have dev teams spend more time polishing and refining the games’ mechanics and/or story if the trade-off is less “realistic” graphics.  

It might just be personal preference, but I wish we were getting more stylized character and world design. Go look at some screenshots for Pathologic 2, a game that came out last year that hits that sweet spot between full-blown cartoony/caricature and realistic by today’s standards:

And I think that is somewhat what they were going for with this remake’s character models (or I hope it was). But it’s still not quite there, hopefully they’ll work on improving those so they can hit that sweet spot also.

(in defense of my hipocrisy and love of The Witcher 3, I think the more realistic look was appropriate for the world they were portraying, it benefits from it. However I don’t think I would love it any less if it had less detailed models and environments)

One last thing on the graphics.

I will say this though, at least from the footage we see in the new trailer the team seems to be capitalizing on colour. Big vibrant reds, blues, whites and yellows in the environment look great, and really captures the 1.001 nights/arabian nights feel that I absolutely love. I appreciate that since there’s always this tendency for remakes to suck all the colour and life from the original (in both games and movies), regardless if it fits the setting and tone or not.

Anyway, I think the reason I’m very much without a big reaction is that I believe the 2003 original is a true classic, a masterpiece even - I guess I should stress out that when I say masterpiece, I don’t mean it’s perfect. Just that the whole is bigger and better than the sum of its parts, that the things it does right, it does so right, that it completely overshadows the flaws. 

The story, the art direction, the gameplay (the holy trinity of platforming, combat and puzzle solving), the brilliant introduction of the dagger of time as a gameplay and story mechanic (one of my favourite mechanics in all of gaming), the music, the charming duo that is the Prince and Farah, the tight pacing with the game being just the right length and not overstaying its welcome, the outstanding level design where you’re never stuck doing one thing for too long (the game is always juggling between combat, story, platforming and puzzles, mixing and matching)… 

Looking at all these things, I just really don’t think we need a remake because I don’t think there’s that many glaring terrible flaws that could justify it. 

Adding more scenes and content could be good, or it might backfire: bloat and ruin the game’s already excelent pacing and fluidity (which I think is the main keyword that better describes the original, everything flows superbly). The original was only 6-8 hours long and it is better for it. I’m not confident that adding dozens of hours of gameplay like the big tittles today would help at all.

The only real improvements I can see are: 

tweeking and perfecting the combat (I’ve seen it mentioned that they’re implementing a targeting system which sounds good); 

perhaps also better Farah’s A.I during combat when you have to help protect her from swarms of enemies;

Maybe throw in a couple more enemy types? The cut sand tigers for example? 

usual things like adding the option of subtitles, add the ability to skip cutescenes;

But other than that…

I don’t even think the graphics of the original look bad. They’ve aged of course, with the game being 17 years old, but still. I installed it last night and played through the first hour to take some screenshots and I think they’re still good:

I can understand the MediEvil remaster, the Spyro remaster or the more recent FFVII remake in terms of wanting to update the graphics. I can understand that not everyone can easily go back to these low poly lads:

 But this game? I know I’m influenced by nostalgia and all, but I don’t think it needs that makeover that badly, especially when compared to these other remakes and remasters. Funnily enough, I just noticed that these examples I just listed were all PS1 games. PoP: SoT was a PS2 , PC and Xbox game. PS2 era games have aged far better visually and don’t need that big a makeover in my most humble opinion.

It would be one thing if the original was out of print like a Rule of Rose scenario ,where you can’t find the game unless you go to ebay or something and it’s stupid expensive. Or if it was a pain to get running on modern systems like it was with Grim Fandango, until it got a remaster. 

But no, you can find the Sands of Time trilogy and the PoP (2008) reboot on GOG and Steam (on Steam only there’s also the PoP:The Forgotten Sands midquel). So there isn’t the usual problem of the game no longer being accessible to people who want to play it, which helps justify the need for a remake.

The original still plays nice, sounds nice and looks nice, so I guess this all goes to show that at the end of the day, this remake just feels a bit unnecessary to me, at least from what little the trailer showed (I would love to have my bitter cynical ass proved wrong though!). 

 Maybe I just have a superhuman tolerance for older games and how they look, I really don’t have that big a problem if the game itself is good or interesting, so I don’t always think older games need remakes.

Maybe my falling out of love with Ubisoft in this last decade has curbed forever any hype I might have for their announcements, even when they pull out my  son, my baby boy Prince of Persia out again.

 Maybe I’m just burnt out and too pessimistic about remakes, remasters and adaptations (although game remakes usually do better than film ones).

And this makes me a bit sad because I don’t want to sh*t all over the first piece of “new”  Prince of Persia content we’ve had since 2010??? Oof, it’s been a while.

Especially knowing that Yuri Lowenthal is coming back and excited to voice the Prince again. And I also don’t want to be too harsh since we’re looking at an alpha of the game. But so far I’m just very numb to this, I do seriously hope it turns out good and that they don’t rush it out the door. But I’m not convinced we need a remake in the first place. The original is a milestone, a game changer. I’d rather see a game that had great ideas and poor execution being remade than something people already love and consider a masterpiece.

 Guess we’ll see how I feel once more news and footage come out.

Oh and feel free to share your own thoughts on this remake. I’m curious to know what both fans and newcomers alike think.

small edit: I can’t believe I was just watching this Sands of Time playthrough on youtube and at one point it is said: “Another game that is designed similarly to this is Soul Reaver actually.” 

Of course! I didn’t even see it! All of my favourite things are connected!!! Maybe that detail was another thing that helped me getting really into Soul Reaver as I was first playing it.

[danyka-fendyr]

Bartender

Okay so I promised @faintrecognition I would write this like a month ago and then I proceeded to grapple with various plot ideas, start then restart, and just generally procrastinate. This isn’t edited but at least it exists. Anyway, here’s a Reylo AU fic. Enjoy!

Taglist:@rhabakoli @dreamwritesimagines @alwaysadreamingoptimist

Wordcount: 1686

Warnings: Some mild language. Barely even there tbh, and I wouldn’t count it.

               Rey had no great love for her job as a bartender. It was not, by any means, the most rewarding of jobs. Mostly it involved men unsubtly checking her out, trying to use her as a therapist like they were tipping her well enough for that, or getting drunk enough that they tried to destroy the bar she worked in, prompting her to take several self-defense classes after first getting this job. As it turns out, pool sticks can be wielded as bow staffs with some level of effectiveness.

However, her status as a bartender was largely non-negotiable thanks to her deadbeat absentee’s parents heavy debt. They might as well have sold her into slavery when they got themselves in debt up to their shoulders then up and died. Since before she could remember, Rey had been working to pay that money off, and bartending tipped very well, so here she was.

She figured the second oldest profession in the world had to be better than the first. Right?

All of which brought her to this moment, holding the wallet of a man who was long gone, left in the pocket of what seemed to be a very expensive blazer, displaying the name “Ben Skywalker.” Which could only mean one thing. One thing that was hopefully not going to cause a lot of trouble in Rey’s life but probably was.

She was holding the wallet of Senator Leia Skywalker’s only son, and she was going to have to contact him to give him back his credit card. Somehow she doubted there was going to be a reward for this. The only reward Rey had in store for the night involved wiping down the sticky counters of the empty bar and seeing if she could fix the perpetually blinking second L in the sign outside, which currently read “The Mil_ennium Falcon.” She had mostly given up on it, but the owner had promised her a bonus if she figured it out before he had to break down and call a repairman, so she had hit the wormhole of YouTube home improvement videos yet again.

She sighed, deciding that the best option for her tonight was to call now and see if he even picked up just to get it over with. She doubted he would and, if she was being honest, sincerely hoped he didn’t. The last thing she needed tonight was to deal with some arrogant jerk. Even if his ID picture was handsome.

While she wasn’t a fan of looking through people’s stuff, she didn’t hesitate to delve through his wallet until she found the business cards she knew would be in there. Rich people and socialites. So predictable.

She dialed the number from the bar’s phone, since she firmly classed this as a work problem. She was still on the clock and had to deal with it? Then it was a work problem. She waited several rings, patiently resigned to when it would tell her to leave a message. But that did not happen.

“Hello?” A low, tired voice answered.

Rey realized with a start that there was a very high chance that this was the voice of Ben Skywalker. Of course, it could be the voice of anyone. An assistant, a secretary. However, she was pretty sure she’d seen him in an interview on TV once, and he sounded something like exactly this.

She was absolutely unprepared for this.

“Hey, so uh…it’s your bartender. From The Millennium Falcon.” Get to the point Rey, before he hangs up on you. “Just calling to let you know you left your credit card here. And also your entire wallet. And a blazer. It’s a very nice blazer. Was it tailored? Because it looks tailored. Really nice work.”

Oh gosh. She sounded like an idiot. She hadn’t had time to script this!

Thankfully, he seemed amused by her little ramble.

“I’ll make sure to tell Finn you like his handiwork.” He chuckled, a sound that should not have seemed so velvet smooth over the crackling of the phoneline. “I’ll be there to pick it up in 20.”

That was the second time this man had thrown Rey for a loop tonight, and she had to make an actual effort not to scream.

“Oh, you really don’t have to. You can just come in tomorrow and get it.”

“No, it’s alright. You guys aren’t finished closing yet, are you?”

Rey looked around at the true mess surrounding her, knowing that it would take her hours to clean this since her boss refused to hire on any extra help, and gave in.

“No, we’re not finished closing. You can come now, if that works for you. Just knock three times and I’ll come unlock the door for you.”

“Okay. See you soon.”

She would have replied with the same, but he hung up on her before she could. Rude.

While she waited for him to arrive, Rey took to doing her actual job. Wiping down and sanitizing counters, tables and chairs, sweeping up the floors, and generally putting elbow grease into every flat surface of the establishment. The entire time she was waiting anxiously for his knock, so when it came she didn’t hesitate to go check to make sure it was him and then open the door.

“Hi. Your wallet is on the counter.”

Belatedly realizing how short that must have sounded, Rey mustered up a tired smile before turning back to her work. There was a particularly bad spot at this one table she just couldn’t seem to get out, and she was thinking about taking some grease remover to it to see if that helped.

“Are you cleaning up here all by yourself?”

Rey looked up at him, surprised at the attempt at conversation, and got her first real good look at him. He was tall. As in, possibly part giant kind of tall. He stood several heads above her, an imposing presence with his dark eyes and long hair framing his face. If she had been a lesser woman or seen fewer unfortunate twists of fate in her life, she might have been intimidated by him. As it was, she was just trying not to think that he looked a little bit sexy.

What? She was only human.

“Uh, yeah.”

Good work Rey. Truly, a riveting conversationalist. Your communications professor would be so proud.

“Coworker call out sick?” He rumbled.

“No.” Might as well answer honestly since she wasn’t going to see him again. “I don’t have a coworker. My boss is cheap and I owe him too much money to discriminate.”

He raised an eyebrow. “How’d a girl your age get in so much debt?”

She bristled at that.

“I’m not a child,” she said. “And to answer your question, it’s not my debt. It’s my parents. They left it to me as an inheritance. I suspect you know a thing or two about those?”

He scoffed.

“You could say that. When did they die?”

“I was just a little kid. Don’t really remember it much.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. Not your fault, is it?”

She gives up on the spot on the table and instead goes for the broom perched against the wall. Unfortunately, this takes her path right past Ben Skywalker, who takes this as encouragement to talk to her more.

“So if you’re so strapped for cash, how do I know you didn’t rob me blind?” His tone is only half-joking.

“You don’t. I suggest you check your wallet.”

He did just that and seemed to find everything to his satisfaction as he nodded his head and slipped it back into the pocket of his coat.

“Let me get this straight. You work for the guy you’re in debt too? How do you know he’s not rigging it? Messing up your payments so you owe him longer?”

Rey didn’t dignify that with a true answer, only a withering glance in his direction.

“Oh. He is. Then why do you still work here?”

He sounded genuinely confused, enough for Rey to take pity on him and provide a verbal answer.

“Because he owns me, pretty boy.”

He seemed greatly amused and surprised by her use of the nickname, the corner of his mouth turning up involuntarily.

“Okay, well I could own him.”

Rey was confused by his bragging. Sure. Of course he could own him. He could probably own anything he wanted, given who his parents were.

“Good for you.”

She gave an unenthusiastic fist-pump, which only served to amuse him further.

“And if I own him, then it stands to reason I also own everything he owns.”

Rey came to understand what she thought to be his meaning slowly.

“So me. You would own me.”

She grits her teeth, trying to hold back several cuss words. This arrogant, scheming bastard. Thinking he could just buy her like one of his infamous model dates, maybe swing her around to a few charity galas before he got bored and she was used up.

“Well yes, but also no. I would own you briefly before absolving you of your nonsensical debt. The sins of the father, after all, should not be the sins of the son.”

Rey felt the deep-set urge to take back everything she had ever thought about him and apologize profusely.

“Why…why would you do that?”

“Honestly? You’re the first person I’ve met in a while who hasn’t tried to kiss up to me. I was hoping to offer you a new, better job, where nobody would cheat you out of your money. How do you feel about being my…advisor, I guess?”

Rey stared at him in shock. There was just no way this was happening.

“There would be health benefits,” he said by way of reassuring her. “Dental and all that.”

Dental. He thought she was worrying about her freaking teeth.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll be your advisor.”

“Excellent. I’ll inform my assistant, Hux. Can you start tomorrow?”

“I…”

“You’ll be free tomorrow,” he said.

She knew he didn’t mean she would have enough time.

“Yeah. Yeah I can start tomorrow.”

[kirinda-ondo]

So I have some thoughts and feelings about Vishnal Rune Factory

I am aware that approximately two other people besides me care about this, but literally when has it ever stopped me from rambling at length

So basically, I love Vishnal from Rune Factory 4. Like, a lot. I never commit to anyone in farm sims but boy howdy, he managed to hit literally all the criteria I have to be considered a Favorite Character™. He did it so well, in fact, he’s earned a spot alongside characters like Cobalt or Lydia. But like those characters, while there are people who like him, I feel as though he doesn’t get enough credit. The complaints I’ve seen tend to be that he’s boring and that he has the worst proposal event. Hell, one of the first few results from googling him is a thread asking if he’s supposed to be a joke character. While I can see where this sentiment might come from, I’d like to explain the appeal in a lot of the things people find fault in him for (at least for me), and maybe offer a bit of a different perspective, I guess.

If I had to guess where a lot of these problems that people have with him come from, it’s probably the fact that he doesn’t have a lot of lore behind him. To be honest, Vishnal doesn’t really have a whole lot of plot significance. He doesn’t have any direct connection to the capitol of Norad like Arthur or Kiel (via his sister Forte), he’s got nothing to do with the Sechs empire like Doug, and he’s not a guardian like Dylas and Leon. Vishnal, despite working in a castle and serving Ventuswill (who we shall henceforth refer to as Venti), a literal dragon god, is an everyman by comparison. He’s just a guy trying to do his job the best he can.

Similarly, he also doesn’t have a whole lot of mystery or drama behind him either. With pretty much every other bachelor, there’s usually some kind of dark secret from their past that comes up and has to be dealt with, either through the main plot or through their proposal events. To just give you an idea of the kind of things we’re dealing with here, let’s do a rundown.

Doug’s entire tribe was killed by Sechs soldiers, but the empire fed him propaganda to make him believe that Venti was responsible so that he would work undercover for them in order to kill her and take the Rune Spheres.

Arthur was an illegitimate child of Norad’s king and believes that his mother hated him so much she had to take off her glasses so that she didn’t have to look at him, causing him to have severe trust issues (as well as a glasses fetish? Have fun with that, Freud).

Kiel (and by extension, his sister) is trapped in a well-meaning, but incredibly fucked up family dynamic that forced him to be incredibly sheltered while Forte took on the duties of a knight in a heavily male dominated society to protect him. However, since both of their parents are dead, they have no idea that they’re allowed to free themselves and become their own people.

Dylas sacrificed himself to become a guardian, fusing with a monster in order to act as a living life support to help keep Venti alive, but when he’s finally free, he’s hundreds of years into the future, where everything he knows is gone. It’s also implied that before he became a guardian, he was suicidal.

Leon, like Dylas, also sacrificed himself to become a guardian and was flung far into the future. However, he also has the added guilt of believing he left his childhood friend to live the rest of her life emotionally stunted because when he was younger, he made a promise to marry her if she stopped crying so much, but didn’t take it seriously as she did, and couldn’t have kept it even if he did.

Meanwhile, Vishnal has had an utterly average life. In order to help people, he wanted to become a doctor like his father, but felt he wasn’t smart enough, so when he met a butler named Sebastian, he was so impressed he decided to become a butler himself. Though he was worried his father wouldn’t approve of this way of helping people, he was ultimately supportive, helping him train and, through a friend’s connections, getting him to Selphia to work under Volkanon.

Vishnal is basically Clark from Connecticut in terms of how average he is by comparison. However, I wouldn’t say this is a bad thing. Even dealing with one of these traumatic backstories is a lot, let alone trying to harem them all (and don’t even get me started on the main plot’s drama). A lot of the resolutions to these character arcs are followed up by a proposal, and maybe it’s just my age and personal experiences (or the fact that I’m aroace), but when that happens, I don’t get the feeling of “YES, TAKE ME NOW!” I just think “…You literally just found out the thing that’s been screwing you up your entire life was a giant misunderstanding. I get that you’re happy but like, maybe take some time to sort yourself out? See a therapist maybe???”

But Vishnal, for all of his faults (of which there are many and I will get to that later), generally has his shit together. I respect that and find it a breath of fresh air compared to the cavalcade of angst in everyone else’s lives. Not to say that he doesn’t have any problems at all, because then that would be boring, but they tend to be more focused in the present, and are a bit more grounded in reality and less… spectacular. But like I said, we’ll get to that.

What he lacks in terms of dramatic backstory, he makes up for in personality. He’s very… intense, to put it mildly. While not completely hyper, he’s very high energy and it doesn’t take much to get him psyched up. He’s the type of person to put at least 110% effort in everything he does, and nearly everything he does goes towards his goal of becoming the world’s best butler. Unfortunately, as a result, he’s considered one-note. Now, I’m not going to sit here and say he doesn’t talk about butler things all the time, because he absolutely does, but for me, as someone who also tends to get super into things and talk about them endlessly (hence this entire ramble), I find him pretty endearing, if not a tad relatable in that regard. However, for all his single-mindedness, he is still a decently multifaceted character.

Probably the most important thing to note here is that he is a very good person, like “too good for this sinful earth” kind of good. He has a natural drive to help others and doesn’t have a mean word to say about anyone (though even he engages in the ultimate Selphian pastime of Teasing Doug™ on occasion). He’s also honest to a fault. It’s incredibly easy to tell if he’s trying to cover something up because he’s usually pretty much an open book and wears his heart on his sleeve. He seems to expect others to be the same way, as he has a bad habit of taking what people say at face value even if they’ve repeatedly shown not to be trustworthy. This often leads him to be the butt of many a joke or the victim of scams. Other times, lighthearted teasing falls flat as he takes it seriously and winds up getting his feelings hurt. But ever the optimist, he doesn’t let setbacks get him down for long.

He very much believes in the power of hard work overcoming any obstacle, and it seems in his mind, literally anything is possible if you train hard enough, and he’s constantly trying to prepare himself to master every possible scenario, from protecting important secrets by staying silent to becoming invincible to the common cold by constantly being soaked with water. It generally winds up doing him more harm than good, and even Doug worries about him a little bit because Vishnal will do pretty much anything if you tell him it’s special training (though this does not even remotely stop Doug from having a field day with it). Were this not a very “anime” kind of game, it would honestly be amazing if he hadn’t died from any of his training attempts.

Though it may come across as though he has no idea what is actually possible for a human to achieve, he actually seems to have quite a few hangups about his own limitations. He has a massive perfectionist complex and is incredibly hard on himself. He tends to beat himself up quite a bit when he makes mistakes (I mean the man looks utterly devastated every time he screws up lunch) and outright warns the player (who we shall henceforth refer to as Frey) that he may cause her trouble. However, he’s not quite as terrible as he might imply. While he is gullible and very much a klutz, he’s got a wide variety of skills and knowledge he rarely gives himself credit for. For instance, he’s not exactly street smart by any stretch of the imagination, but he’s well-read to a degree that he can actually read things from Arthur’s library (which says a lot because Arthur is a colossal nerd), and he’s knowledgeable on a number of subjects from farming to geography. On the lake date (when it’s not summer), you have the option to ask him more about the kind of training he would do, and he rattles off a list of insane skills (I.e. making tea so good as to become its own singularity…singularitea, if you will) like it’s no big deal. Mind you, given what someone like Volkanon is capable of, that may just be par for the course as far as butlers go in this universe, but for your average person, that’s honestly impressive, if not a bit terrifying.

His confidence (or lack thereof), however, tends to reflect in the quality of his work. In a small example, every so often, he offers Frey his attempt at curry rice. It’s hot garbage, but if she tells him it’s good, he admits he wasn’t very confident in it. However, we see in his prerequisite event (which is a much more overt example) that when he’s more confident in himself, he’s not only able to make actual food, but is downright hypercompetent in his job. For context, he is conned into buying an overpriced statue that, according to blacksmith and Professional Vishnal Scammer™ Bado, will allegedly make him an expert overnight. Wholly believing in this thing, he’s suddenly amazing… until he accidentally knocks it over and breaks it. Utterly devastated and unconvinced that his improved performance came from within, he’s suddenly infinitely worse than he was when he started. Things of course balance themselves out, but we come away realizing that if he had as much self-confidence as he did pure determination, he could easily reach a point where he’d be absolutely unstoppable.

We also see this lack of confidence manifest itself in regards to Frey. If she pursues a relationship, we get quite a bit of evidence that he doesn’t think he’s good enough for her. Before he formally asks her out, he lists all the things he does wrong; all the ways he’s a novice, essentially warning her of what she may have to deal with. However, if Frey’s conquered the RNG and made it this far, then it’s safe to say that she’s prepared to take the risk. On the airship date, he outright says once he becomes an expert, he’ll finally be the perfect man for her. Even during his own damn proposal event, he tells her he’s unreliable. This is incredibly far from the case, as even if he doesn’t really know what he’s doing, he’s doing everything he can to make this work. He works himself even harder to maximize his time with her, he buys (phony) charms from Bado to keep them together, he asks other bachelors for advice (as poor is it may be at times), he literally asks the entire town for date spot reviews, as well as just straight up reading up on how to be the best possible boyfriend.

Eventually, should the RNG gods be smiling, this brings us to the proposal event. Now, one might imagine that this event might follow the thread we’ve been building up here into him learning maybe not to beat himself up so much or becoming a little more self-confident, but no. While this sort of thing happens for a number of other bachelors/bachelorettes, where their prerequisite events foreshadow what’s to come in their proposal events, that isn’t quite the case here. While that development does occur to a degree, it’s a bit more subtle and is not really the focus of this event.

His proposal event instead mainly forces him to consider his priorities. So for some context, a butler judge has come, and if Vishnal does well, he may finally earn his first star and be one step closer to being the ultimate butler. In fact, his abilities are already recognized as worthy of the title, but there’s just once teensy little problem. You see, in butlerdom, your master and your partner being one in the same is a bit of a taboo. Dating your boss creates a whole host of problems, after all; not just for you, but your reputation. And so this is where the conundrum comes in. We already know he’s incredibly dedicated to this career choice to the point that if he doesn’t succeed, he will literally die trying, but he’s now just as dedicated to Frey. Being that this is a proposal event though, you pretty much already know how this is going to end, but just hear me out.

This is currently the biggest decision he’s ever made in his life, and is essentially the emotional equivalent of having to choose between losing your right hand or your left. He obviously doesn’t want to throw away years of hard work, but he’s also not the type to just leave someone behind in pursuit of his own interests. Frey ultimately saves him from waffling back and forth about it forever by breaking things off so he can pursue his dreams, but literally no one is happy with this. Even the judge feels bad and he’s the one who started it. But with this little problem out of the way, Vishnal is free to accept his new rank. Except he doesn’t. After a dramatic, heartfelt speech pointing out that this actually puts him in a better position to serve Frey, and how reputations shouldn’t matter more than protecting the person you’re entrusted to, he whisks her away and proposes. Before she can properly answer though, he’s called back to the castle. In the end, the judge is moved by his dedication, and so Vishnal can now have his cake and eat it too. Short, sweet, and to the point.

It’s probably about half the length of the other bachelors’ events, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s bad. It’s actually a pretty nice contrast between the other proposals. Leon, Arthur, and Kiel have the common thread of having to sort out baggage from their past before they decide to marry. Doug and Dylas, while their events are more lighthearted, are a bit more focused on a lack of communication and resulting misunderstandings that come from trying to surprise Frey with a ring. However, because Vishnal’s life isn’t a veritable conga line of angst and trauma, his obstacle to marriage is entirely in the present, and because he’s so open about his feelings, he and Frey actually have a chance to sit down and discuss where to go from here, so there’s no communication issues. Plus, his situation, while a bit dramatically handled because anime, is actually kind of relatable. Having to choose between a career and a relationship is a situation that happens to a pretty good number of people, and it’s rarely an easy decision. It’s a logical conflict for such a work focused character.

While it doesn’t really overtly follow up on the initial thread that seemed to have been laid out of him learning to be more confident in himself, the transition is definitely there, at least in regards to Frey. It’s just not quite as spelled out in events. Even in his proposal, he’s still self-deprecating, but it’s a far cry from the absolute list of faults he gave initially asking her out. Not to mention, it absolutely takes a whole lot of courage to one, choose love over your life’s dream, and two, to do it in the incredibly dramatic and utterly obliterating manner that he did. The relationship also changes some post-marriage. Post-marriage Vishnal is a much different beast than pre-marriage Vishnal. As we’ve discussed, in the dating phase, he’s a lot less sure of how boyfriend things work, and resorts to asking others for advice and outright studying. Now that he’s married, he’s less reliant on others and is much more forward. He actually tends to be the one to initiate romantic gestures, from goodnight kisses to using his own sappy lines as opposed to borrowing them from Leon, among other things. Truly a far cry from the days where he would agonize over whether or not to even hold Frey’s hand. Sadly, while date dialogue doesn’t really change (with the exception of the room date, where he literally states he’s past being shy and awkward), there’s definitely a more visible shift in the focus of his other dialogue from being even good enough for Frey to being more protective. Jury’s still out on how much this development has affected his work performance, as there’s no real new mentions of it after the fact (though after marriage he is finally capable of making edible curry rice…sometimes!), but at least some degree of his self-esteem is improving.

So basically, to summarize, Vishnal isn’t a bad character. He’s just handled differently than the other bachelors. He’s a bit more grounded in reality as far as his backstory and conflicts are concerned. His development also tends to happen outside of his events rather than being the feature, making it a bit more subtle, and thus a bit harder to spot from a glance, but it’s there. For as much fun as he is as a character, I admit he’s definitely very tame compared to the other bachelor options, even despite the localizers’ attempts to make him spicier, so he’s not for everyone. I can see why others might prefer someone a little more exciting or mysterious, like Leon (who seems to be like, god tier as far as RF4 bachelors go), but I hope I’ve at least adequately explained why Vishnal might be appealing to some and has more merit than just a joke character. After all, vanilla is a flavor too, and plenty of people like that.

Anyhoo, thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[bob-dude]

Some Orange Jerk’s Hazbin thoughts, the longer version.

As I mentioned in a prior post, I  thought the pilot was so-so. Don't hate it with a capital H but find everyone's love for this show to be... odd. Though considering the late 2000s Devinart vibe I get from the show’s art style, probably not too odd now that I think about it. So here’s my longer, more rambly, thoughts on Hazbin Hotel by some rando Orange Jerk on Tumblr.  And as always, more power to ya if you do love it, obviously.

Art direction wise, I’m just not crazy about Viv’s color choice. The red and black and pinks give a Valintine’s day meets Wonderland Queen of Hearts vibe that just doesn't personally work for me on a visual level. 

As for hell itself, I thought the background stuff like ‘Radio Hack’ and the main city being named Pentagram to be... eh? Like, that’s the kind of world-building we’re going with here? It felt less like Hell and more like a city with the trapings of Hell, at least for me. 

So, main cast, the trio as it were. Eh. Meh. Like, Charlie is a Disney Princess of Hell... even though no one treats her as one respect wise which just strikes me as odd from a background perspective. And Charlie has that standard Disney nativity going on... even though she was born and raised in Hell? Like, why bother to make your most optimistic and native character a denizen of hell if she’s not going to look or act the part personality wise?

The reason the personality thing confuses me I guess,  is that take Charlie out of Hell and we’ve seen her character a thousand times before: The bubbly sweet optimistic girl that’s been done so many times before.  Is the ‘But in Hell!’ aspect really that much of a grabber for people? Guess it is and more power to em but it just strikes me as a strange creative choice where once again a character's personality doesn’t logically flow from their background. 

Design-wise Charile is fine, red tux reminds me of the God from the 1977 Oh God movie so that gets a thumbs up in my book. Still a bit weird that a princess is wearing it but it makes sense with the Hotel set up and all so her outfit has a logic to it. 

Then we have Vaggie. So, legit question here people: If you went into the pilot blind and Angle Dust didn’t make his ‘taco’ comment would you have ANY idea that Vaggie is supposed to be Latina? Because I legitimately had no idea that was what her design was supposed to say about her as a charchter. Also didn’t really get a moth vibe from her, either if I’m honest. As for her personality, she’s the standard ‘loving supportive’ GF but with an angry side protective side for Charile... and she’s a Latinia/Latinix.  Does... Does no one else think that’s just a bit... off? Making the one clearly marked Latinia character the ‘angry girlfriend’ archetype? 

Also, that weird pink X eye patch bugged the hell out of me when I was watching. Totally petty as shit nitpick, but I had to vent on that bit. Honestly, though Vaggie is also Meh? Like, she’s in a relationship with Charlie, cool and all but she just doesn’t strike me as a terribly interesting character if I’m honest. Gives me a sort of Lisa Simpson ‘stick-in-the-mud’ vibe. 

And then we have Angle Dust. You know, in the words of Netflix’s Big Mouth, “Sassy and Gay”  isn’t a personality. Angle Dust basically has that sort of ‘2000s  Yaoi OC’ vibe and considering Vive once had a DA character sheet where she literally listed his personality is ‘Bitch’... Yeah. 

Also, as I’ve said elsewhere, Viv and crew are doing too much with this guy. So he’s an ex mobster killed by his homophobic father in the 1920s (not mentioned in the pilot but it is a pilot in all fairness so you can’t throw all your cards on the table). And he’s a Spider Demon... even though per Word of Viv how everyone’s designed in hell doesn’t have anything to do with how they died on Earth (then why deign them that way?). And he’s a porn star (being ex Mob shouldn’t he be the one paying for porn stars as a power domination sort of thing?). AND he’s going for a Beetlejuice meets CJ from Regular Show sort of design.

It just seems a bit much, imo. Like, you could make him just a gay ex mob who mostly uses a Tommy Gun and design him to fit that and leave the Spider-Demon stuff out and it becomes a lot more manageable. Something like a simplified Zoot Suit, or the like. You could keep the sexual humor but throw it a bit more 1920s slang and pop culture references for characterization/comedy purposes (Vaggie, for example, has no idea what he’s talking about most of the time). Granted, I’d personally rather they ditch the ‘animal bits slapped on’ aspects of the designs as a whole but that, as always is just me.

For the record, I’m not ‘offended’ by Angle Dust as a character concept, I’m just not wowed or impressed, ultimately.

And then we have Alastor. Now, I LOVE Alastor as a character. He’s got that classic ‘reality warper’ vibe ala Bill Cipher or Discord but with a 1920s radio show host twist that I just think is amazing and the sound distortion they added to his voice was a really cool touch on top of it all. The problem, as always, comes more with the color choice. One one of your own characters can’t take someone seriously because they look like a ‘strawberry pimp’ that might be the time to maybe go with a different color pallet? Like, idk,  maybe throw in some warm browns and brass golds to involve the 1920s radio vibe stronger? Radios of the 20s and 30s weren’t famous for being red, is what I’m getting at.

The other problem with Alastor is that he’s too strong a personality, ironically. He comes in at the tail end of the pilot and basically steals whatever interest a potential audience member (or at least fat orange jerks like me) might have had in Charlie's plight. It's like introducing Bill Cipher in the first episode of Gravity Falls. At that point whatever interest you might have had in the MC goes out the window and you think ‘what’s this dudes deal and can the show be about them instead please?’ Sure, Alastor in all of his pesudo deer (Those don’t look like horns in my opinion but whatever you say Viv) is fun to watch but he drowns out Charile through sheer force of charisma and showmen ship. Maybe the series itself will fix this but for the pilot at least I think it’s an issue.  

Also, Nifty is Nifty and she needs her own spin-off ASAP. That is all. 

Husk is literally Avocato from Final Space with wings and some gambling bits thrown in design-wise. That’s literally all I think of Husk, sorry Husk fans :(

The animation is good, but I do find it ironic that as much as people like the bitch about  SU being off model, Hazbin I thought suffered from so many different animators tackling different scenes that it just felt jarring going from one scene to the next due to the difference in style and the shifts in animation pacing. Now, don’t get me wrong, a lot of it looks great but that switch in animators kinda just took me out of the experience in places.  Well, that and the lack of proper scene transitions. Those are what also made the pilot feel like whiplash for me.

And now comes to Bob’s thoughts on the plot of the pilot and this is where the logical holes of the series start to get to me just a bit.

So. Charlie wants to reform the demons of hell of their sins so they can get to heaven and Hell can lower its population and angles down come down and deliver some righteous furry smiting on their asses. Okay. Stupid question but what the hell is Charlie basing this off of? I mean, was AD really THAT good an actor that Charlie thought going full steam ahead on the Hotel idea was the next reasonable step up?

 Like, the Hotel was clearly a mess and her staff is literally just her and Vaggie and MAYBe Angel Dust. Even if the episode had ended with a horde of demons lining up to get into heaven by way of cleaning up their acts there’s no way two, three people could handle that (Or, you know, six if we throw in Nifty and Husk in fairness now that I think about it).

 And that’s ultimately the thing with the pilot, the demons are assholes as you’d expect the citizens of hell to be but if they are assholes... why should we care if they get redeemed or not when not one of them is clearly interested in the idea? As cheesy as it would have been, the pilot ending with a horde of demons wanting to give this ‘become better’ thing a shot would have at least left the pilot on a better note to end on. As it is it just seems like Charlie is doomed to fail because no one but her gives a shit or belives about her idea for the Hotel and we have no proof that her idea will even work. Which just makes me wonder: Why should I care if no one else does?

Ultimately, the show has potential but the art style and aspects of the writing just don’t click for me. The show doesn’t say ‘adult’ to me so much as it does 'Hot Topic Teen trying to be adult' which works for a lot of people but for me I think Hellevua Boss as more potential concept-wise. And has scenes on Earth which do the red and black and pink and white colors of the demons a lot better visual justice contrast wise but that’s just me. 

[callsignbaphomet]

Hmm, let’s get into something that MIGHT be long, who knows. What is Legion? What do they do? Where do they work? How long have they been around? Are their goals/methods/etc. different from their creation?

I’ll try to summarize it as best as I can.

Oracle Corp has been around for thousands of years. It started around 9,000 BCE. It started as a group of three mercenaries, one of which was Aleksey (Angelus’ grandfather) who at the time was known by his original name Xisuthros-sin Razi.

He was the werewolf, another one was a vampire and the third member was human. Basically they’d take any jobs that involved more supernatural aspects. Like get rid of a vampire war lord, gang of werewolf slavers and so on. With time the three of them were called to handle that sort of thing. But they also helped their own. If there was a village or tribe or what have you composed of vampires that only fed when it was necessary and stayed away from humans to avoid incidents but humans were hunting them down they’d get rid of the hostile humans. Or helped secure hunting grounds for werewolves to hunt in but not spread out. That sort of thing.

With the years that then turned into centuries the original 3 grew with even more members dedicated to keeping things in balance for both non-humans and humans. Some died either of old age or disease, some died while on the job and some retired.

As the centuries went and the organization grew and grew Morris sent some of his most trusted and spread them across the world and that’s how the branches came to be. Also as time went on and humans kind of forgot or turned away from anything supernatural for the most part which helped keep Oracle and their activities under wraps.

In modern times they still dedicate to keeping things balanced between humans and non-humans dealing with both non-humam terrorists who got a little too big headed for their own good which could expose them to the dangers of the public realizing there really ARE such things as werewolves, demons and vampires. Also dealing with humans that know they exist and because of fear and prejudices hunt and kill non-humans.

Biggest threat Oracle has to deal with consistently is the Court of Knights. They were born from the time of emperor Constantine but almost flickered out but during the height of the Inquisition where fear, superstition and misinformation ran amock they rose again and this time with full forces. They kill anything and everything that is non-human and the humans that associate themselves with non-humans since in the Court’s eyes those humans are tainted and traitors.

The Court applies a lot of inhumane practices and the people in their ranks are less than savory to say the least. Often times accepting n*zis and white supremacists, terrorists of all kinds and extremists. There are unofficial groups called Slayers that are the more in your face with their hate and agendas, and are loosely organized and brutal. Knights of course look down on Slayers but they certainly use them to further their goals.

Important to note that Oracle does not answer to any country much less any government. They’re basically a group dedicated to the people basically made up by the people. Yes, humans are very welcome there since that’s the idea, shadow citizens (non-humans) and humans working together to keep things in balance.

I’m gonna be honest and say I have no knowledge of how economics work in an intricate level but as for how Oracle maintains itself and manages to pay it’s employees? Over the long centuries Morris, leader of Oracle, has used his fortune to invest and create dozens of companies. Investing in companies in fields that are as stable as they can be like medical. He’s also made companies mostly in the medical field that the population benefits from but doesn’t even know it’s tied to Oracle. Hell, most humans don’t even know what Oracle is. Alongside the medical field he invested a lot in technologies and has companies in the field of technology. So besides paying close attention to Oracle Morris also controls all of that and once Morris decides to step down he’ll dedicate completely to that side and leave the entire organization of Oracle to Jelani. For now Jelani is “in training” and oftentimes is the acting leader.

Honestly agents and employees of Oracle are very comfortable economically speaking. Familiars, these are associated with Oracle but not actual agents, are paid well as well but not as much as an actual agent or direct employee.

All the branches are susceptible to moving locations for many reasons mostly being exposure. So for example branch 07 could be in Nice, France for 20 years but then that branch moves to Romania. Also agents circulate between branches depending that branches needs. For example Katya who is a skilled hacker could be sent to South America for a mission that requires her expertise and once it’s done she can return to her home branch in Russia.

TL;DROracle is a paramilitary secret organization composed of non-humans (shadow citizens) and humans that answer to no country or government working to rid the world of supernatural threats and threats against the supernatural. Oh my god I hope this mess made sense.

[raguna-blade]

Today in Late to the Party Reviews and Analysis…Criminal Girls: Invite Only.

A Brief Review And Analysis.

A Minor Trigger Warning for Sexual Abuse. Mentioned, but not detailed.

Now, I’m sure I could go into detail about the gameplay of this, the art design, how it handles all that good stuff. Honestly, doesn’t really matter to me unless it’s terribly exceptional or interesting.

It is a bit here, so I’ll start there.

Really the only thing of particular note on the gameplay side of the equation for this game is that honestly it’s a odd that you lack direct control over your characters, so you can’t actually direct their moves. Beyond a certain point you’re basically hoping that the characters pick the right moves, and you’re able to deal with the situation appropriately.

More often than not though, you are. After a little while the game actually gets pretty predictable about what to expect out of the girls, especially as you open up the full deck of skills for each person, allowing you to more or less consistently deal with any given threat. What’s more, provided you have the MP and such for it, you pretty consistently get the skills you want to deal with a given situation anyway. Low on HP and have one of the healers, Well, expect to get healed. Enemy primed to launch a big attack? You can expect the powerful defend options to pop up reliably. Is the enemy vulnerable? Time for a big blow. And so on. It’s actually rather interesting, and kind of like a card game except you can influence the deck to give you better cards.

Which is pretty cool.

But Let’s be real here, that’s not what this game is about. What it’s main advertising push is anyway. It’s about acting out some BDSM fantasies on a bunch of anime girls. It is absolutely fraught with all kinds of questionable things and it’s blatantly all about playing to the fetishes.

And I am absolutely cool with that. Fantasy is fantasy after all. Only someone who is flatly uninformed or a loon looks at the situation presented in game and goes “Yep that’s totally how all of this works, this is 100% Alright.”

It’s not, I think we can all agree with that, and carry on with the fact that as a fantasy, it works. Maybe not every one’s speed, but hey you like what you like and it ain’t hurtin anyone except by meta trends which are a whole different entity of game entirely. We’re talking pong vs soccer here they’re so different.

So, what’s the story there in the land of whips and fantasy?

Well, to be frank, eh? Like, ignoring the censorship change- Which I have to say having played it is basically not for any real value that matters- the bits that are supposed to play to the fetishes probably certainly do, but the mechanical aspects of it leave a lot to be desired, and frankly are a little boring? I suppose they’re alright as the odd minigame, but it’s nothing I’d exactly want to play over and over again.

And honestly the way the narrative treats it, it is, in fact, a weirdly mutual thing going on. Consent is, at best, questionable, but that’s part of the fantasy. It’s kind of hard to get upset as you go along the game, even if in the beginning the girls clearly want no part of it. Not to mention that because of the way it works you can literally end up with a girl begging you to go on when in game she’s working on like five or six levels of discomfort and loathing towards you. Bit of a fail that.

But hey, that’s how it works out in these kinds of sex fantasy things. No to yes, everyone ends up happy and cool with it in the end and no terrible mind breaks or bullshit like that. Simple and clean.

Yay!

So, hey, let’s talk about the plot and characters for a minute. Now, I could go into depth with each character, and maybe someday I will when I get enough energy to be willing to go back and play this in full with notes, but right now, I just want to focus on one girl and the overarching plot here.

The thrust is thus.

You, our nameless faceless protag, have signed up for a job to get some much needed cash. Said job sends you literally to hell to oversee some sinners. Not just any sinners mind.

Borderline ones! That is to say, folks who are ALMOST condemned to hell, but haven’t actually properly died yet or made that last critical step. They can be saved!

Your job then, is to properly motivate them into becoming better people, partially by the motivation mechanic as discussed –Which by all indications was supposed to be well…Not quite as pleasant as it ends up- and by guiding them through a labyrinth designed to make them confront their darker sides and either perish or triumph over it.

Simple!

And as you go through the game you do so, eventually culminating in a good couple of scenes that explain exactly why the characters in question ended up in hell.

The scenes and backstories are actually quite good. Nothing super complex mind you, but with enough depth and solid characterization that you could very easily get attached to any give character.

And naturally I did. Since you get access to every character from the beginning you basically get to pick which characters you want to hang out with, and get a crash course their surface personality in the opening minutes.

This is also where you get to do the first motivation scene, which is basically about as uncomfortable as you’d imagine.

Attracted to that oh so lovable tsundere archetype, I chose Ran, Not to mention because she was clearly rocking the wrath archetype of the sins given the seven characters, so I figured eh she’d be fun.

Still part of the fantasy and all that, so it’s cool.

Now remember like, 200 words back how I mentioned we get to know what caused the girls to turn out the way that they did?

Spoilers ahead so skip ahead if you want to go in blind. *** Indicates they’re over.

Anyone want to take a guess as to what caused Ran to become a violent man hater?

If you guess heavily implied rape as a child you guessed both right and remarkably specifically.

Now, still this is a game, and fantasy, but that’s a REAL FUCKING WEIRD detail to include in a game with dubious consent as one of its underlying premises, even if trust and friendship is also one.

But damn if this one particular reveal, in addition to the knowledge of what I had chosen to do earlier of my own volition did not shake me more than any other twist reveal has in a game elsewhere. I mean honestly, what other game makes you feel like the sleaziest fuck on planet?

And while part of the game is unquestionably trying to get you aroused, I can’t help but think that the effect is absolutely intentional. Ran is, as far as it goes, the most loud boisterous character in the beginning, and I think she’s even first in the queue so absent of any particular preference you may as well pick her.

And then this very pointed fantasy breaking scene pops up and you have to kind of go…Shit.

No real way around that. It wouldn’t matter if you picked any other girl because well…ALL of them have some degree of trauma going on, and most of them have some issues of problems with authority figures so…

It’s interesting I suppose I could say.

*** Spoilers Over.

Now then, I’m understandably vague about a lot of this. To be honest I haven’t played the game in a good while, but If you’re anything like me, and with this being my first review of any kind publically available you don’t really know yet, you’ll find this interesting and probably worth a play.

The plot and characters are simple but well done, the gameplay is pretty enjoyable on the whole if awkward. It’s certainly a novel enough system anyway and may be worth it to check it out if you’re interested in odd game design for RPG type games.

And if you read the spoiler, you may have a better understanding of why I find this rather interesting.

A pretty good game all in all. For you number fans out there I give it a solid

7/10 Memorable, but nothing exactly groundbreaking.

Written By Raguna-Blade

A shout out, as it were, to the person who’s review more or less talked me into checking this game out in the first place. You might check their analysis out if you’re curious, as they go a bit more in-depth than this very much off the cuff review did. Link Below.

https://moegamer.net/2015/03/30/criminal-girls-a-game-about-trust/