#((yeah this man is usually levelheaded when hes with his team.. but he has his rare instances where he panics when either of his besties are

[viviskull]

@cflight​ : x

“What, like you’re makin’ an effort?” Ekira spat back, rubbing their temples with a disgruntled look. It was enough already Ekira was at their wits end, but Lewis making a comment certainly didn’t help to add to the growing irritation.

“I’m tryin’ to be reasonable!” they say after a moments pause (and screaming into their vest), placing their hooves on their hips. “Jus’ stop with th’ sass for a minute an’ let me think!”

Lewis’s panic was barely being disguised underneath the flaming rage that was his only saving grace from completely falling apart.  His heart was pounding hard against his chest, and it felt like the stone walls that kept them close and compact together in this locked cell were slowly starting to close in on him.  Everything was set aflame with a familiar set of phantom pains he rarely had the chance to process; his skull hurt with a newfound ache he never felt before, his legs burned as if they would fall going off at any moment, and his arms felt twisted and deranged in joints he should’ve felt he could’ve forgotten he even had.  Being forcefully separated from the only other people he had considered so dear to him was another set of heartbreak all on its own, even when he knew somewhere deep down he’d find his way back to his little family eventually.  But it hurt all the same knowing, when he was thrown in a cell with his only other companion who didn’t spark as much as a lick of confidence, he felt useless without the help of his flames; only being weakened when these weirdo cult followers had done some spell to him, only to lock him and Ekira away in this cell for later questioning.

His mind would’ve been completely drawn into the dark depths of his panic attack and locket if it weren't for the fact his companion’s ceaseless pacing around the room was hurting his head so much.  Lewis let out an uncomfortable growl as he uncharacteristically shrinks back from his friend’s retorts.  From the safety of the only clean bed he was resting upon, they were right in some stance he was being of much help.  Without his blue energetic spark and his orange husband by his side?  He was about as useful as a pathetic little low tier spirit in this time sensitive danger they were both in.

But it didn’t mean their anxious walks around the cell were doing them any favors either.  Right now though, he didn’t have the energy to argue about it when his mind was so focused on the screams echoing in his own head.  Could they hear it too?  Maybe with a little bit of Vivi’s blood, maybe, but Arthur was long taken away from him to make that ability much being useless right now. 

Still, he only shoots Ekira daggers as he hugs his legs to his chest.  “What do you suggest we do then?”  He barks back.  “We can’t just wait for those psychos to let us go!”

[seita]

— reacting to your death. 

atsumu, osamu, kita, aran, aone, + futakuchi.

+ this is childhood friend!reader.

tw: major character death, grieving

note: i made your cause of death more ambiguous this time around...hope u like it!!!

part one | part two | part three (coming soon)

— miya atsumu.

atsumu doesn’t handle trauma well

he doesn’t have good coping mechanisms

he acts like everything is fine, lets all the hurt and anger build up inside him.

he turns volatile, insufferable to everyone around him because he refuses to acknowledge what’s happening, what’s hurting him.

+

osamu had noticed the alarming silence and misery in his twin’s eyes. everyone in their family and their friends all knew about your death by now, but atsumu refused to speak about it. he refused to tell anyone details or acknowledge the fact you were gone.

“how’d she die?” osamu finally asked one night. he had stood in the doorway, watching his usually lively brother cry into his hands -- completely unaware he was being watched.

atsumu didn’t answer and osamu sighed, “how did she die, atsumu?”

“shut your mouth, samu,” atsumu spits, glaring at his brother with red-rimmed eyes. the look held none of the fire it usually would. instead he just looked so heartbroken that osamu felt tears of his own pricking at his eyes.

he called you friend too but it was different with you and atsumu. you were best friends. and osamu knew his twin loved you more than anything, maybe even more than volleyball itself.

“just tell me...” osamu sighs, “you need to talk about it. so you can start feeling better.”

“i...” atsumu’s voice broke as he sobbed, “i don’t think i’ll ever feel better...not without her.”

— miya osamu.

he’s much more levelheaded than his twin but he still doesn’t know how to cope with things like this

he doesn’t have a particularly good support system around him

it’s not like his brother is someone he can have heart to heart talks to

nor does he have anyone else he can consider someone he can lean on

no one but you

so, like his brother, he lets it build up

but he doesn’t make it anyone else’s problem

+

he stood in the kitchen, moving on autopilot. his head was empty, all thoughts turned off to avoid thinking about you. because he knew that the second you came to mind, he would be in tears again. and his head hurt from crying all day yesterday.

it still didn’t feel real to him and he couldn’t bring himself to confront it. because he didn’t know who to turn to. you were the only one he wanted to talk to.

but you were gone.

and now he had no one.

his twin watched helplessly, completely unequipped to help as his brother fell apart at the seams.

“samu...” atsumu sighed, “you’re making one for her again.”

osamu froze, looking at the half-filled pink-themed bento he kept at his house so he could bring you lunch. he deflated and slowly put his hands down.

“right...” he whispered, “well...you can h-have this one then, yeah?”

atsumu nodded, choosing to ignore the way his otherwise stoic brother cried as he finished putting the bento together.

atsumu knew the food would taste bitter with the thought that it was meant for you and you would never be able to eat the food osamu so lovingly made you again.

— kita shinsuke.

contrary to what people may think, he’s not a robot

he tries very hard not to break in public

he doesn’t want his friends to see him vulnerable and broken

only two people have ever seen him like that; his grandmother and you

without you, he really doesn’t know what to do

he feels numb

+

he mindlessly stares down at his hands, calluses suddenly seeming interesting. he didn’t notice the eyes of his friends on him, exchanging weary looks to one another.

“kita...” aran begins but the captain doesn’t show any signs of having heard him, “i know you’re having a hard time, man but...”

kita looks up, blank eyes meeting his expectantly. aran finds himself unable to think of anything. kita was hard to read usually but even aran could see the heartbreak the captain was going through.

after his friends extended silence, kita looked back down and sighed. but he didn’t say anything. he couldn’t think of anything to say.

briefly, he thought about how he never had to struggle to tell you things. a lifetime spent by his side allowed you to easily read him.

when he looked up at his team, he was met with uneasy, curious gazes. no one would ever be able to understand him and know him like you did.

and now he had to figure out how to cope with that loss.

— ojiro aran.

he probably handles it the best

but inside, he’s falling apart

he just wants you there with him but he knows you wouldn’t want him to wallow in his misery and lonliness

but how is he supposed to do that when he just misses you so much?

he tries his hardest to work through it

but it’s just so hard

+

he didn’t even remember playing the game. it all moved in a blacked out blur. all he knew was that when the crowd cheered and his teammates clapped him on the back with wide grins, he couldn’t even muster a fake smile.

his eyes moved to the stands, hopelessly looking through the unknown faces in the crowd. every time he played, he allowed himself to feel a little shrivel of hope that you would be there.

he didn’t know why he let himself hope. he knew you were gone, dead.

his throat felt tight and he looked back at his teammates as they celebrated. he muttered about going to the locker room to clean up, completely ignoring the sympathetic looks in his friends eyes.

he knew that his wins would never feel the same again. not after years of celebrating each one with you since he was a child.

winning was only bittersweet without you there.

— aone takanobu.

heartbroken doesn’t even touch how he feels

hes not someone who has ever dealt with loss before. sure, his grandfather died when he was a kid but that was different. he was a kid.

you’re someone he’s had since he was a child, you went to elementary, middle, and high school with him

you were the only person he would ever openly call his friend -- his best friend.

death is unfamiliar to him and without you there to guide him through it, he’s lost

+

he sat on the train, seats on either side of him empty. usually you would be perched there, talking his ear off about some nonsense. he never minded, he had long since grown used to you filling the silence with your voice.

but now, he realized, that even though he never said anything, he never got used to the quiet. anxiety swirled up inside him and he hung his head, judgemental eyes of other patrons felt like lead weights on his shoulders.

usually you would glare at anyone who looked at him like that, making the gazes fall from him and freeing him. but you weren’t there now.

and he realized he had no idea how to function without you.

it wasn’t that he was dependant on you to live his day to day life.

you just made him happy.

and made it easier for him to breathe when you were there.

tears pricked his eyes as the words passed through his head.

‘i miss you.’

— futakuchi kenji.

he’s actually kind of a popular guy but there’s no one that compares to you

no one has seen him turn from an awkward adolescent into a confident man

he’s lost and sadder than he had ever been before

he really doesn’t want to believe it but there’s no way your parents would lie to him

but secretly he hopes it’s all just a big ruse

and if it were, he wouldn’t even mad -- as long as it meant you weren’t really dead

+

he opened his phone, a reflex. it was always on silent, which meant he always missed your texts and whatnot.

he went to your text thread and sighed as he suddenly remembered. your last text was from a week ago and he felt empty as he read it for the millionth time. he couldn’t bring himself to delete any of your messages yet, terrified that he would forget the funny things you’ve said, the sweet words of encouragement, or even a dumb meme you sent on a night you couldn’t sleep.

half of your friendship was memorialized in your texts.

and he can’t risk forgetting everything that he had left of you.

© all content belongs to seita 2021. do not modify or repost.

[the-iceni-bitch]

Territory Getting Hotter

Pairing: Carol Danvers x enhanced!Fem Reader

Words: ~2.9k

Summary: You’ve made another mess for the Avengers and they find out about your relationship with Captain Danvers

Warnings: explicit language, explicit sexual content (fe receiving oral sex, use of toys, squirting, overstimulation, light dom aspects), mentions of canon level violence, SMUT!!!! 18+ ONLY!!!!

A/N: I love these two!!! Dom!Carol is it you guys, wow. Also, reader is such a massive pain in the ass and I love her for it, I can’t wait to piss off every single Avenger with her antics.

Check out my masterlist and join my taglist here!

You beamed at Carol when she walked into the kitchen, still bleary eyed from sleep as she stretched and ran a hand through her hair.

“Hey babe!” You grinned at her. “Guess who made pancakes?”

“You’re the best sweetie.” She murmured, wrapping around your back and nuzzling into your hair. “We’ll make a housewife out of you yet.”

You laughed as she moved to pour herself some coffee when there was a sudden pounding on the front door.

“Danvers!!” A low voice shouted through the door. “Open up, its Rogers!!”

“Shit!” She hissed, looking around frantically as she tried to find someplace to stash you.

“Would you relax?” You said as you rolled your eyes at her. “He has to find out sometime.”

“Yeah, but not today! He already sounds pissed. One second!!” She shouted back, throwing on some sweats. “Just find somewhere to hide, I don’t feel like dealing with this today.”

She moved to open the door as you shook your head at her, weighing your hiding place options.

“Hey Steve, what’s up?” She said, nonchalantly as she let him inside.

“What’s up? Have you watched the news yet this morning?” He seethed as he stormed into the kitchen.

“Oh no. What did she do?” Carol said, taking a deep breath and cursing you in her head for whatever shit storm you’d started now.

“I can’t even talk about it, I’m so mad.” He growled, moving to pour himself a cup of coffee without even asking. “Even Stark was pissed, and he’s usually pretty lenient.”

“Uh-huh.” Carol said as she chewed on her lip and nibbled on a piece of bacon.

“She managed to drag Thor into it, too. We may have to move her to a full time handler, one that she can’t corrupt.” He said, starting to calm down a little bit. “We’re having a meeting about it in 30 minutes, just wanted you to be prepared. How would you feel about taking her on?”

Carol heard a snort from somewhere in the apartment and did her best not to whip around to find you. Unfortunately Steve heard it to with his damn super soldier hearing.

“What was that?” He hissed, his eyes darting all over the quarters.

“Uh, my smoke alarm’s been acting up.” Carol muttered, trying to usher him out the door. “I’ll think about it, see you soon!”

She slammed the door closed and started searching for you.

“What the fuck did you do, baby?” She asked, scanning the apartment for you.

“Y’know, I think I’m gonna leave that for a surprise.” She heard from above her head and shot her gaze upwards.

You had somehow managed to wedge yourself into a tiny corner in the ceiling of the hallway leading to her bedroom. She was giving you a disapproving look as you dropped to the floor with a grunt and grinned at her.

“You think you can handle me babe?” You said as you moved to the bedroom to get dressed.

——————————————————————————

The two of you were sitting across from each other in the conference room half an hour later, trying to act like you didn’t fuck each other’s brains out every chance you got.

Or, at least Carol was. You were sliding your foot up the inside of her leg as she glared murderously at you and you just grinned like an idiot. She shook her head at you and turned to look at the giant screen where Tony was pulling up the surveillance footage as the rest of the team gave you exasperated glances.

“Oh, here we go, we’re getting to the good part.” Tony said, giving you a meaningful look as he slowed the footage down. “Now who’s this guy you just punched in the face and then threw across the club like a rag doll?”

“I think that’s the Duke of Edinburgh.” You said with a shrug, leaning back in your chair.

“No, that’s the Duke of Sussex, y’know, the queen’s nephew.” Nat said as she took a long drink of her coffee, looking exhausted.

“Oh shit, really?” You said, still grinning like an idiot. “Whoops.”

“And wait, here’s where Point Break blows all the lights in the club, which he says was your idea, so the two of you can make a run for it.” Stark said when the video suddenly went black.

“We weren’t making a run for it, we were pursuing our suspect.” You said, staring daggers at Thor as he tried to sink into his chair.

“Uh-huh, and did you catch your suspect?” Steve said through gritted teeth.

“Yeah, he’s in holding right now.” You said with a shrug.

“What?! Why wasn’t that in your report?” Rogers said as he started to dig through the pile of paperwork in front of him.

“I haven’t completed the report yet, Captain Rogers.” You said lightly. “I made sure to update Captain Danvers though.”

“Let’s not get off track, this is about you assaulting a member of the royal family.” Tony said as he tried to redirect the conversation.

“He assaulted me first! He grabbed my ass and made some very ungentlemanly comments about what he would do if he got me in his car.” You said, pouting as you rested your head on your hands.

“He did grab her ass, Stark. I saw it.” Thor piped up before Rogers shot him a look and he went back to inspecting his coffee.

“So you threw him? That seems like a bit of an overreaction.” Tony said with an uncomfortable shrug.

“It’s a reflex, Stark.” You said, your eyes rolling back in your head as the other women frowned at him. “Sorry, I don’t think putting up with sexual harassment is in my job description.”

“Ok, ok fine. Nat, is there anyway you can spin this?” Stark said, turning to Romanoff as she let out a deep sigh.

“Yeah, the man is a pretty notorious dog, shouldn’t be too hard.” She muttered.

“Great! Excellent meeting team, see y’all at the next one!” You said, starting to stand up before Steve turned his attention to you.

“No, we still need to discuss your recklessness, Y/L/N.” He seethed, shooting you a scowl that you returned with a mocking air that had Carol trying to hold back a snort. “I’ve thought about it a lot and I think the best course is to have you under more direct supervision. I considered splitting up you and Odinson but I feel like that would just spread the chaos around after how much you’ve corrupted him.”

You shot a grin and a wink at Thor that he returned as the two of you finally relaxed, but Steve was still talking.

“So, Danvers is going to be accompanying you on your missions now. I feel like her levelheaded attitude is just what’s needed to keep you two in line.” He said with a satisfied smirk.

“Uh, you sure Danvers is the best choice there, Cap?” Tony said whole Nat snickered into her coffee.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t she be?” Steve said as he looked around at everyone’s amused expressions with confusion.

“They’re fucking each other Steve.” Nat said nonchalantly, sending Steve into a spluttering fit as you started cackling and Carol just rolled her eyes and groaned.

“What?!” Rogers roared, his eyes moving frantically between you and Carol as you grinned at him like an idiot. “How long has this been happening?”

“Six months.” Carol said resignedly, taking a gulp of coffee as she shrugged uncomfortably. “Didn’t really feel like dealing with the paperwork.”

“Si... six months?” Steve groaned, burying his face in his hands. “And you didn’t think that might be a conflict of interest?”

“Don’t worry Cap, Danvers is quite the disciplinarian.” You said with a wicked grin as you waggled your eyebrows suggestively.

Carol growled at you and gave you a meaningful look, and you just rolled your eyes at her before leaning back on your chair and propping your boots on the conference table.

“Well... shit.” Steve sighed, running his palm over his face in exasperation. “I guess Bucky can probably oversee some of your ops, and I’ll take over the rest of them. What?”

You and Thor both groaned at that, rolling your eyes at each other.

“Just, Barnes? Could you pick a bigger stick in the mud?” You said with a shrug. “I mean, we get it dude. You were tortured by evil scientists for years who turned you into a mindless killing machine, who wasn’t? And, I love you Steve, but do you even drink?”

“Ok, we’re gonna head out now.” Carol said as she frowned at you, stepping between you and Steve before a real fight broke out. “Guess we’ll report to HR as soon as we can.”

“Uh-huh.” Rogers mumbled, pouting a little as she ushered you out of the room.

Nat followed after the two of you lazily, shaking her head at Steve and Tony as Stark and Thor tried to assure the Captain that he was loads of fun to be around and a blast at all their parties.

“Congrats again you two.” She said with a grin as she split down a different hallway to her own quarters.

“Thanks Nat! You ever gonna tell him about you and Wilson?” You yelled after her, laughing when she flipped you off over her shoulder. “Told ya they knew, babe.”

“Yeah.” She mumbled before grinning at you. “So, you beat up a royal?”

“Shit. In my defense, I didn’t know he was a royal until after I threw him.” You said, following her down the hall back to her apartment. “I thought he was just a smarmy asshole.”

“That’s the problem, sweetheart.” She purred over her shoulder. “You never consider the consequences of your actions.”

“That’s all I think about, babe.” You said with a wicked grin as you waited for her to open the door.

“And now you’re dragging poor Thor into your messes.” She tutted, shaking her head at you as she closed the door and stripped off her jacket. “If I didn’t know better I’d think you had a little crush on that himbo.”

“If you didn’t know better?” You beamed at her, starting to unbutton your jeans and step out of your boots. “Honey, he’s a literal god. I have a massive crush on him.”

“Oh, are you trying to make me jealous?” She ripped off her tank top and threw it aside. “Cuz I’m already pissed at you.”

“Yeah? What’re you gonna do about it?”

She stepped forward and gripped your jaw tightly, smashing her mouth to yours as she started steering you towards the bedroom. You yelped when she tossed you on the bed, grinning as she climbed on top of you.

“You’re such a bad girl.” She growled at you, ripping your bra off in one quick motion.

You screamed when she slapped your tit harshly, the stinging sensation warming your chest while she bent to open the top drawer of the nightstand.

“I am. I’m fucking horrible.” You gasped as she rifled around. “What are you doing?”

She grinned at you as she straightened back up, holding a set of extra shiny looking restraints.

“These are vibranium.” She cooed as she grabbed your wrists and dragged them above your head, hooking them through the headboard as you panted underneath her. “I stole them from R and D, and there’s no way even you can break out of them.”

“Yeah, we’ll see.” You said around a smirk, giving your hands a test yank and nodding appreciatively as Carol shackled each of your feet to the opposing bedposts.

She bit her lip as she stared at you, your legs spread wide over the bed and making your back arch. You moaned as she tore off your panties and slapped your pussy, your muscles twitching as arousal seeped out of you.

“Mmm, you look so good like this.” She mumbled, sliding down until she was laying between your thighs. “Can’t decide whether I should edge you all night or make you come so many times you forget your own name.”

She ran her tongue over your slit in a heavy stripe and you let out a shriek as you came as soon as she reached your clit. She pressed your hips into the mattress as she lashed her tongue against your bundle of nerves, making your legs quiver with the strain of your orgasm.

“Looks like you made my decision for me.” She grinned at you before diving back in.

Her tongue swirled through your folds expertly, sucking your lips into your mouth and humming against you as your pussy started clenching around nothing. She wrapped her lips around your clit and you came again with a sob as your limbs pulled against the restraints, your body trying to arch off the bed.

She shoved her tongue inside you and you screamed as another orgasm crashed over you when her teeth brushed against your tiny bundle of nerves. Carol kept curling her tongue inside you as you vibrated underneath her, moaning as your release flowed into her mouth and soaked her chin.

“Fuck, Carol!” You whined as she sat up between your legs and lightly ran her fingers over your inner thighs. “That was almost too much.”

“Oh, we’re not done yet.” She smirked as she watched you panting underneath her, reaching for the bedside table again while you squirmed.

“Hey!” you exclaimed as she pulled out a massive dildo from the drawer of toys. “Is that my stormbreaker? I’ve been looking for that!”

“Yeah, well I wanted to see what all the fuss was about.” She murmured before dragging the length on the thing through your slick coated folds, making you keen. “Did you know this thing comes with a thruster?”

“Yeah, why do you think I bought it?” You teased before your eyes rolled back in your head as she shoved it inside you.

She started fucking you with the toy at a punishing pace, grinning as you came apart like putty in her hands. Tears started leaking down your cheeks when she turned the vibrating function on and angled it so it was teasing against your clit with each push.

You whined as she bent over you and wrapped her lips around your nipple and swirled her tongue around it. She grinned against your chest as you tried to arch into her mouth, your restraints still holding you in place.

“Mmm, you gonna come again baby?” She muttered, nipping at the curve of your breast as your body started twitching, your release looming over you as you sobbed wordlessly. “Do it, you look so pretty when you fall apart.”

She twisted her wrist and you shrieked as your pussy fluttered wildly, your release leaking out around the dildo and pooling on her sheets. Your cried as she kept fucking you through it, wet sloshing sounds filling her bedroom as the toy slid in and out of you easily.

You let out an inhuman wail when she turned on the thruster and you felt the tip of the toy punch you in the cervix, coming again immediately as your body writhed wildly.

“Shit, I see why you love this thing.” She smirked as she kissed her way up your chest, still shoving the toy into your overworked cunt as your body went lax, your head polling to the side and drool leaking from the corner of your mouth. “You think about Thor fucking you when you use this, babe? Maybe I should bring him in here to fuck you stupid while I watch, would you like that?”

You just mumbled stupidly as your body shook with another orgasm, sinking into the bed in your fucked out state. Her slap snapped you out of it, making you take in a sharp breath as your brain rebooted.

“I asked you a question.” She growled as she twisted the toy again and you let out a low moan.

“I feel like this might be a trap.” You gasped as she palmed at your breast and laid down against your shoulder, still thrusting the toy into you viciously.

“That sounds like a yes to me.” She purred, nuzzling into your neck as she gave the toy a final push.

You screamed as she pulled it out of you suddenly, your release squirting out of you in a violent rush. Your body thrashed violently with the power of your orgasm and Carol cursed as you snapped her headboard and bedposts, the bed frame shuddering before one of the legs gave out and it sank to the floor with a crash.

“Holy fuck, you ok?” She asked, sitting up and grinning at you as she assessed the damage you’d caused.

“Yeah.” You said, swallowing thickly as you moved your limbs with a groan. “At least we know the cuffs work! Sorry about your bed.”

“Don’t worry about it.” She murmured, grabbing the key and unlocking the restraints before pulling you back against her chest. “We’ll just use yours I guess.”

“Are you gonna move in with me? I think that may give Rogers an aneurysm.”

“He’ll get over it.” She shrugged as you nuzzled into her chest. “Now, how do you think we should approach Thor?”

“What?! You were serious?”

——————————————————————————

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[wildernessuntothemselves]

I Hate Me Now

Word Count: 6k 

Genre: Angst, smut 

Summary: You and Wonpil used to be lovers, soulmates even, before your priorities in life got in the way. You wanted to do anything to help your family, no matter how morally ambiguous it is, while Wonpil thought that doing the right thing was of the utmost importance, no exceptions. Now, facing off in court years later, all the old wounds gets torn open again and things finally come to a head.

A/N: *long fart noise* this fic had the potential to be something good but I fucked it up and I’m beyond even caring.

Warnings: inconsistent writing if you’ve ever seen one, kinda femdom, unhealthy as per usual, sad little story.

The neutral, slightly intimidating mask you put on everyday was the one most people were familiar with by now. You rarely showed your real emotions anymore, not since you had lost him. His departure brought on a profound change in your life. There had already been a rift growing between who you wanted to be and who you had to be in order to survive, but when he left he took any remaining idealism left in you with him. It’s funny that the reason he left you was because he couldn’t handle your diverging moral standings, yet it was precisely his departure that cemented the turn you had taken.

Now, with him standing opposite you in the courtroom, fighting for the opposing team, you feel your mask slipping. It was hard seeing him like this. Even though it’s been years already, not having him break into that breathtaking smile of his that was like an ingrained reflex as soon as his eyes would meet yours was disquieting. Now he just frowns and looks away; his big, beautiful eyes that used to be filled to the brim with a sort of dreamy goodness were now empty and tired.

Needless to say, you weren’t on your best game. You could hardly concentrate at all during the trial, and you can bet your ass that your boss knew about your abysmal performance before it even ended. As soon as you were out of the courtroom, he was calling to give you crap about it and condescendingly remarking that if you couldn’t handle such a big case then you should’ve left it to someone who actually knew what he was doing, emphasis on the ‘He’. You assured him that everything was under control and that this wouldn’t happen again. You were just caught off guard, not that you dared tell him that last part. This was a huge case and it could either make or break your career. You couldn’t afford to get distracted by the man you had once thought to be the love of your life, and might still do…

You had to do this for your family. But it seems the man in question intends to put your resolve to the test.

You don’t know how he found you. Perhaps he had followed you out of the courthouse. Did he hear you talking on the phone to your boss? You sure hope not, not when his mere presence was forcing you to face the fact that you never got over him after all, and you didn’t need him to see that. You had hoped that the time and distance would harden your heart and heal the wounds he had inflicted upon it but all it took was one look in his eyes for them to get ripped wide open again.

If nothing else, you wanted to keep your pride. He doesn’t get to break your heart and see you still broken up about it all these years later. So you put on your mask again and smirk at him, “Good work today, Pili.”

His frown deepens at the term of endearment you used to call him when you were together. You suppose you aren’t allowed to use it anymore, which is precisely why you do. “Too bad it won’t do you any good. You always did have a soft spot for the hopeless cases.”

Wonpil puffs his chest out, subconsciously trying to look bigger under your mocking gaze. “Our case isn’t hopeless.”

“Yeah sure, whatever you say, Pili.” You roll your eyes. You should end it there, tell him you have no time for him and leave to go work harder on your case to take him and the people he represents down. But you haven’t made a levelheaded decision since the moment he came back into your life and you just can’t resist adding, “You shouldn’t be wasting your skill on these people. They’re never gonna win. Join my company. I’m sure I can find you a place.”

Wonpil’s face contorts in disgust, “You think I would ever be a part of a company like yours? You kill people!”

“My company doesn’t kill people.” You reply half-heartedly, not really up to defending your employers out of the courtroom.

“Maybe not directly but the chemicals they pollute the environment with has led to the illness and death of countless people. That’s on your hands.”

You’re not surprised that he insists on making you complicit in the actions of the company you’re representing. Wonpil always did have an absolute sense of justice, from the CEO to the janitor, everyone was equally responsible in his eyes.

 “Be careful what you accuse people of, Pili. This could get you in real trouble once my company wins the lawsuit. And they will win.” You smile sadly, “They always win.”

You walk closer to him and reach out for his hand tentatively. You’re surprised when he lets you, and you take a moment to just hold it, feeling the familiar, yet almost-forgotten, weight of it in your own hands. When you lace your fingers together, they fit as perfectly as they did years ago, the heat of him permeating through yours like blood through a corpse revived. 

You know you couldn’t let yourself get carried away for long. You needed to say what you had to say and then withdraw back into yourself when he inevitably rejects you. Rubbing your thumb over the web of skin between his thumb and index, you take a few moments to steady your breath as you willfully shed years worth of mental defenses to allow him to gaze onto the real you, naked from any pretenses and completely vulnerable against the bottomless darkness you see in his own eyes. 

“I’ve missed you so much, you can’t even know. I… I still want you.” You weren’t sure if it was just your voice that was trembling or your entire body—you were holding too tightly onto his hand to be able to tell. “It’s not too late for us. We can still be together. What you’re doing right now is admirable, fighting for those who can’t fight for themselves. You’ve got the most beautiful soul I’ve ever seen… but it’s a losing battle. There is no hope for them, but there is for us. We can have a good life together.”

His lips press together into a thin line and he yanks his hand back, almost throwing you forward when you don’t react fast enough to untangle your fingers as he steps away from you, looking disgusted at the mere thought of what you’re suggesting. “If you really think that I’d not only abandon these people but actually work against them then you don’t know me at all.”

“Oh, I know you.” You look down at your now empty hands, muttering tiredly, “I just hoped that you might’ve changed.”

“And I wish you didn’t. I don’t even know who you are anymore. You’re nothing like the girl I once fell in love with. You’re a monster.”

You let out a bark of laughter to hide the stabbing pain his words delivered right into the center of your chest, cutting up your tattered heart all over again. “And did you follow me all this way just to say that? Aw, Pili, you shouldn’t have.”

He glares at you, utter contempt displayed on his face.

“I hate you.” He curses out before he leaves, not sparing you a second glance, and for that you were thankful. You could barely stomach the fact that the broken woman who was openly sobbing in the middle of the street in broad daylight was you—you didn’t need him to see that.

___________________________

Just like you hadn’t expected to ever face off with him in a courtroom, you also never expected him to show up at your place only days after your less-than-sweet reunion.

“What are you doing here?” You stand with your arms folded over your chest, feeling resentful that he’s forcing you to deal with the heartache he brought with him into your own residence. “How did you even know where my apartment is?”

“You’ve messed with my damn head.” He accuses, looking deeply agitated as he paces back and forth in your living room.

The audacity of this man! He sought you out first, then he rejected you, and now he barges into your home and claims you are messing with him?

You plant your body in his path to stop his pacing, and ask, putting emphasis on each word, “Why. are. you. here?”

He stares at you for a second, exasperated and contemplating what to say, but each time a sentence starts forming, he bites it back abruptly. Huffing, he runs his hand through his hair haphazardly and tries to get past you to start pacing again.

But you jump into action, your hands shooting out to grab him and hold him in place. You won’t let him play games with you. You won’t be able to handle it.

In the process of holding on to him to try to keep him in place, you had gotten much closer to him in proximity. With your arms almost enveloping him, your heart starts beating erratically. This was the closest you’d been to him in years, and by the looks of it, Wonpil wasn’t completely unfazed by it either.

“What do you want from me, Wonpil?” You ask, suddenly feeling weary as if all the fight has seeped out of your body. 

His eyes flit down to your lips as you talk, and they linger there even after you’re done, giving you your answer. Wonpil was never particularly good at hiding his feelings, something he would readily admit to if asked, and you take advantage of it.

You raise your hand to his face carefully as if he’s a frightened animal you don’t want to scare off. When he feels your hand on his cheek, he finally looks you in the eyes again, and you feel a twinge of pity at the helplessness you see in his gaze.

Taking in a deep breath, you ask slowly, “Do you want to kiss me, Wonpil?”

You knew you shouldn’t be doing this; it will only open up your wounds further, but you’ve never gotten to say goodbye to him, and you knew that if you miss this-- probably last-- chance to be with him, you will live to regret it even more.

You’re so lost in your own head that you miss the subtle nod Wonpil gives you and, antsy by your lack of response, he makes the first move, pressing his lips to your own.

It’s an awkward kiss, tight-lipped and uncoordinated as Wonpil is unsure of what he is allowed to do, but feeling the urgency to touch you anyway. His hands are all over you, but not in a good way. They would barely touch a part of you before they moved on to the next, leaving you feeling unsatisfied.

Deciding to take the reins—which was par for the course back during your relationship anyway—you grab his hands and hold them behind his back, making him whine when you break the kiss. “Don’t whine. You don’t have the right to.”

He bites his lip, stifling anymore protests from coming out. Pulling on his arm, you lead him to your bedroom and push him on the bed. He tries to pull you down with him but you shake him off. Again, he starts whining but with a sharp raise of your eyebrow, he pipes down immediately.

Grabbing the hem of your oversized shirt, you cock your head at him. “Do you want me to take this off?”

“Yes, please.” He breathes out before you’re even done talking.

You slide the shirt up your body slowly, teasingly, making sure to give Wonpil a show. With the shirt off, your breasts are entirely exposed for you to play with them and tease Wonpil some more. Pushing them together, messaging them, twisting the nipples lightly, you do everything you know will drive him crazy until he’s biting down hard on his lip so he wouldn’t piss you off, but you could see from the obvious bulge in his pants and the way his right leg was bouncing up and down impatiently that he was getting needy.

You give your breasts one last squeeze before you slide your hands down your abdomen and towards the waistline of your shorts, pushing it down on one side only to pull it back up and do the same thing with the other side.

“Please.”

“Please, what? You want me to take this off too?”

“Yes.”

“But I thought I was a disgusting monster and you can’t even look at me. You have no problem with it now that you want to get your dick wet, huh?”

He averts his eyes, having the audacity to look ashamed and it pisses you the fuck off. 

You grab his jaw, making him face you, and hiss down at him. “Either you grow some fucking balls and face the implications of your own desire or you get the fuck out of my sight.” 

You needed him to voice out his desire so he’d admit that he’s equally responsible for what is happening. You’re not going to let him paint you as a monster seducing poor, helpless him. He wants this too, and he needs to be held accountable for that.

“What do you want me to say?” He asks, entirely too chagrined than he had any right to be. 

“That you’re a fucking hypocrite.” You spit, astonished at how disgusted you were with him, while still wanting to be one with him. Your whole relationship is a mess, and you’re convinced that either it was never meant to be, or that the gods themselves are jealous of your love and are trying to hurt you.

“I’m… I’m a hypocrite. There, are you happy?” He challenges, but you just let out a tired sigh, almost having expected him to deny it and put an end to this—to tell you that this is insane and you’re insane, but he validates your insanity and now you can’t back down.

No. None of this makes you happy. You haven’t been happy ever since he left you.

You take your shorts and panties off unceremoniously and straddle him, staying still for a moment to see if he’ll try something, but his hands stay balled to his sides as he awaits your permission to touch you, so you give it to him. “Go ahead. You can touch.”

His hands immediately go to your breasts, touching you in the exact same way you were just touching yourself, and you laugh. “Aw, Pili, you wanted it that bad?”

He frowns in that adorably pouty way he unconsciously does sometimes, and it makes your smile falter, the memory of something you used to have but is just out of your reach now is all too painful.

He forcefully takes you out of your thoughts when his mouth latches onto one of your breasts, placing kisses all over it and sucking on your nipple. You moan out, a hand reaching for his hair and automatically tugging on it the way you know he likes, which only makes him needier, one of his hands eagerly moving down to your pussy, and the moan that leaves him lets you know just how excited he is to find you dripping. Too impatient to wait, his fingers move down to your hole right away. When a finger enters you, he’s the one pulling back with a throaty moan.

You chuckle breathlessly, feeling yourself quivering around his finger. “Does my pussy feel that good, Pili?”

He nods, pumping his finger in and out of you, making you gasp as you start unbuttoning his shirt. “Tell me what it feels like.” 

“Tight. Wet. Soft.”

“Hmm, and did you miss it?” You slip his shirt off his shoulders, forcing him to remove his hands from you, but as soon as the shirt is off, his hands are back on you again, one grabbing a handful of your breast and the other two fingers deep in you.“Do you miss how it feels around your cock?”

“Yeah.” He closes his eyes and you know that he’s imagining it. 

“Do you want to feel it again?”

“Yes.” His eyes snap open again, full of silent pleas.

You push him backwards until he’s lying down in the middle of the bed with you straddling him, his cock snug between your wet folds as you slowly rub up and down against it. With your hands holding his arms over his head, he looks up at you, gaze brimming with need as he holds his breath and waits, but you don’t give it to him yet.

“Look at you. You were acting all high and mighty earlier but now you’re willing to do anything to get inside this pussy, huh?” You taunt, rubbing yourself with the tip of his dick.

When he doesn’t say anything, you lean down to bite his collarbone, making him yelp. “Answer me, Pili.”

“Yes, please, give it to me.” He nods emphatically, throwing his head back and crying out as you sink down on him. 

As soon as you have him all the way inside of you, you know you are in trouble. God, he fills you up so good. Everywhere his cock touched inside of you burns with pleasure and you can’t even help yourself; you ride him hard and fast, desperate to feel the kind of pleasure you haven’t felt in years. Everything is just different with him, the way he fits inside of you, the needy, almost reverent look on his face, his choked off moans, they all work you up to a frenzy. 

“Does it feel good, Pili?”

“Yes. So, so good.”

“I bet you’ve been fantasizing about this for years... just lying in bed, fucking your own spit-covered hand and imagining it was me taking you.” 

“Yeah, y-yeah…” He sniffles, lower lip trembling as he readily admits to it.

“You’re gonna cry?” You spit out, suddenly enraged, and come to a stop. “Fuck, you’re so pathetic.” 

“No! I’m sorry. I’ll stop. Please keep going.” 

“No. I won’t let you twist this narrative into you being the victim.” You fall back onto the bed and pull him up over you. “If you want me, take me.”

The muscle in his jaw jumps as he considers his options for a second, and you lay completely still under him, waiting for him to make the decision on his own, half-wishing he’d stop this madness. But he doesn’t.

Grunting, his hands grab your hips as he pushes his length back inside you. It only takes a few unexpectedly sharp thrusts for you to cooperate and wrap your arms and legs around him. Goosebumps erupt all over his skin when you pull at the hair at the nape of his neck, the shaky moan your action elicits causing heat to start gathering in your belly once again. You stare up at him in hunger, admiring how sexy he looks as the pleasure overtakes his features.

“Shit…shit, you feel so good.” Wonpil rasps out, his eyes squeezing shut as his thrusts turn sloppy. “ I can’t hold on much longer.”

“Don’t you dare.” You snap at him, your nails digging red trails down his back, making his hips stutter. 

“Please, I can’t hold it.” He shakes his head, desperate to get you to let him cum.

“No.” You hiss, silencing him with a kiss. You swallow his whines as your hands grab his ass and force him to keep fucking you. The more he squirms, the more his hips grind against you, rubbing coarsely against your clit and bringing you oh-so-close to your orgasm. 

But—seemingly just a second away from release—Wonpil goes rigid under you, his body freezing up too hard to allow you to move him anymore. His mouth tears away from your own in a loud moan as his dick twitches inside you and fills you up with his hot cum.

You can’t believe it. You were so, so close. Frustration and disappointment fill up the spaces the receding pleasure leaves behind.

“I told you to stop.” You hear him say meekly, and you sigh as you’re left tense and unfulfilled, just like always. 

“It’s fine.” You mutter darkly, pushing him off you, and Wonpil’s face falls, shame spreading all over it.

You know your reaction is hurting him. Wonpil hated not pleasing you. He took it as a personal failure if you were even the slightest bit unhappy with his performance. His desire to please and your desire to be pleased are what brought you together in the first place many years ago. But honestly, all you can think about right now is that mind-blowing orgasm you were just robbed of because he couldn’t hold back just a little bit more.   

But before the last bit of pleasure inside you recedes from your body, it is forced back in when Wonpil, still half-hard and sheathed inside you, starts moving again, fucking his cum into your sensitive pussy.

“What are you doing?” Your mouth hangs open in shock and pleasure, and you watch him grit his teeth and set a frantic pace. As his cock starts hardening inside of you again, he’s able to fuck you harder and harder, the determined look on his face the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen.

His moans are loud, and you can’t tell if they’re from pleasure or pain as Wonpil never once lets up his assault, hitting just the right spot that has you seeing white. When his thumb flicks your clit, it is over for you, your hands flying out to grab his face and pull him down into a searing kiss as you cum. 

When you pull back from the kiss, signalling the end of your orgasm, Wonpil collapses into a sweaty mess next to you, still clinging to your body by wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his face in your neck as you both catch your breath.

“What’s so funny?” He perks his head up, asking as you start shaking with laughter in his arms. But the more you look at him, the harder you laugh. This is just all so absurd.

Wonpil watches you uneasily. He needs assurance, something that he had always relied on you to provide for him, but you can’t do that this time. 

You come down from your laughter fit with a deep sigh. “Get out.”

He’s taken aback at your sudden coldness. This isn’t what he expected, not what he was used to from you, and you almost start laughing again. Is he really that clueless? Did he expect things to be just like they were before after what he’s done?

His eyes flit between yours, searching for a comfort he won’t find in them. “But—but… aren’t we going to talk about this?"

“Talk about what, Wonpil?” You ask in exasperation, “Have you changed your mind about my work?”

“No, but—”

“But you want me to make the sacrifice for you.” You finish his sentence for him. “This is why you’re here, isn’t it? You refuse to give up your job but you expect me to give up mine for you.”

“It’s the right thing to do.” He bristles, sitting up.

“I don’t care about the right thing. All I care about is my family.”

His face hardens at that, and through gritted teeth, he says, “Your family isn’t going to starve if you work at another firm.”

“Quality of life isn’t measured by whether you starve or not. I want them to have a good life.” You don’t know why you even bother anymore, he’s never going to listen. “You wouldn’t understand.”

He tears himself away from you and gets up, angrily putting on his clothes. “Yes because I’m just a poor orphan boy who will never understand what family means. Isn’t that right?”

“Pili… you know I didn’t mean it like that.” You unconsciously reach out for him but he jumps away.

“Yes, you did. You always pitied me for not having a family.” Pain twists Wonpil’s pretty features. “You know, for a while, I actually thought you could be my family.”

“No, Pili. I couldn’t have.” You sigh sadly, the deepening look of hurt on his face cutting you up. “Because you left me. And family never leaves.”

His mouth opens and closes like he wants to say something but doesn't even know what. Collecting himself, Wonpil scoffs and turns towards the door.

“Yeah, like that.” You mutter, collapsing back on the bed as you hear the sound of your front door opening and slamming shut. 

___________________________________

You know it is wrong but you can’t stay away from each other. Now that you have had a taste of the forbidden after years of having sworn off each other, you couldn’t find it in you to stop.

You find yourself in each other’s beds again and again, hurling accusations at each other and fucking your emotions out until you’re too tired to do anything but sleep, each time getting more and more exhausted until you stop trying all together, just blocking out everything and focusing on the here and now as if nothing else existed outside of your respective bedrooms. 

Your nights have been sleepless ever since he's gotten back into your life, and not just for the obvious reason that he’s the person you thought was the love of all your lives, past or present. No, many nights were spent just staring at each other, no words uttered for fear of disturbing this fragile improbability that brought you back together, or holding each other so gingerly as if you were made of matter and antimatter and your meeting could annihilate not only yourselves but the entire world you’ve built around you. 

It’s a bubble and you know it, the translucent shell that surrounds you gleaming all rainbow-like when the light of forgotten dreams hits it just right. It sways and wobbles, signaling its impending explosion any moment now. And yet, you stay curled up around each other as if you can’t see the surface tension on the verge of breaking.

Every once in a while, one of you would lean forward and press their lips against the other’s, and you’d close your eyes and pretend like these past years have been nothing but a bad dream and you’re still college students, young and lost and unsure of everything in the world except for the notion that love is eternal and that you have already found it in each other.

You wonder what you’d look like now to your past selves, having gained all the conviction and knowledge you would’ve never thought you would possess, but having lost the one thing that made any of it worth a damn. You bet your past selves would hold each other and cry at the sight of the broken you holding onto the jagged pieces of your once-sweet notion with bleeding hearts and crushed souls.

Tears trickle down your face, and Wonpil reaches up to wipe them with the backs of his fingers, pressing his lips to yours again when the branching stream reaches even your lips.

Pulling back ever so slightly, he whispers to you and to the dying universe around you, the vibrations of his voice reaching your lips through the tiny distance between you, sounding choked up like he had begun crying too, “I wish we could stay here forever, just forget about everyone and be forgotten by them.”

You sigh and wrap yourself around him, his starry eyes shuttering closed and a soft pout forming on his lips as he drifts off to sleep, just like old times. And you're left alone to wonder... if you could do it all over again, would you have chosen differently?

______________________________

You knew something was off. Despite the time and distance that have whittled down your sense of him, you still knew that something was off. Your body had picked up on so many little things—the way his eyes glossed over when he would force himself to face you, his excessively soft touches that resembled those of a volatile lover silently apologizing for his latest outburst, the lingering looks he gave you as if he was memorizing every little detail of you before you went away—it just took your brain too long to make sense of it all.

Or maybe you just didn't want to believe it. You got too greedy and wanted to live in your fantasy world just a little bit longer, and it cost you everything. 

Looking at him now, you think he’s saying something to you but every word is muffled as if you were submerged in water. He gets agitated, shouting something again and again that gets just a little clearer every time as he forces you back to the surface and you register that it’s your own name.

When you blink, your gaze finally focusing on him, he breathes a sigh of relief. “You’re scaring me.”

“I wish I had never met you.” Your sentence is slow and raspy like the ghostly murmur of someone fished out of water.

“Don’t say that.” He whimpers, "I had to do it." He says it like he means it, like he really couldn’t stop himself from betraying you, using you, ruining your life. "You said it yourself, we never would've won. It was the only way. These people depended on me."

"And what about me?" You rasp, tears stinging your eyes. "I loved you."

"And I love you." He tries to hold you but you push him away.

"They fired me.” You inform him monotonously, “They had me blacklisted to make sure I would never find a job in this field again."

Of course they did. What company will want you now that you've shown yourself not to be reliable? You slept with your rival and allowed him to steal crucial documents that could jeopardize the entire case from right under your nose. Your stupid amateur mistake could cost the company millions.

"How am I going to provide for my family now?" You moan, not really asking him.

"You could join us. It's not a big pay but—”

Your hand goes to pull at your hair in frustration, “God, do you ever shut the fuck up?”

"I'm sorry.” He holds his head down, sobbing.

"No, you don’t get to cry about ruining my life! You don’t get to feel sorry for yourself! You don’t—” You stop abruptly, unable to breathe. Cradling your head now, you lament, "Oh god, what am I gonna do now?"

"I don't know."

"No, you never know." You say bitterly. "I don’t want to ever see your face again."

His head whips up, "Don't say that..."

“Go.”

"I didn't mean for all of this to happen--"

"Go." You shriek and he flinches back. His lower lips tremble as he tries to hold his tears back to no avail. In a shaky voice, he says, "I'll give you some time to calm down but I'll be back. I'll fix this."

"God, Wonpil," You suck in a shaky breath, "for once in your life, I wish you'd leave it alone."

He jerks his head away, wiping at his tears furiously, "I'll see you later."

_____________________________

You struggle to hold back tears as you wait inside your cramped studio apartment. You don’t know how much longer you can stand to do this— lie to your parents about getting fired and blacklisted, telling them that you quit for moral differences, accepting money from the man who ruined your life just so they wouldn’t find out for a little while longer.

But you couldn’t do anything to help yourself, let alone support your family without Wonpil’s charity. The only jobs you are able to get now are in the service industry and those barely pay your rent and living expenses. You couldn’t even go back to your hometown and your family for fear that they’d figure out the truth, and you just couldn’t let that happen.

You knew your father would insist on getting back to work in order to help support the family. You barely even had him convinced that his condition doesn’t allow him to work and that he needs to rest. If he finds out you not only lost your job but also any hope for a future one in that field, he’d go back to work right away, and that could very possibly kill him.

Your siblings’ future now lies unknown. The eldest of your siblings after you is a senior now, and soon you’ll have to tell her that she isn’t going to college like you promised her she would. She has to abandon her dreams in order to get a job to help provide for the family, and as your other siblings grow older, they too would follow in her footsteps; a family that came from dirt and will die in it, that’s what Wonpil’s ideals have cost you.

After everything you’ve done, after all you’ve gone through, you’re still nothing. It’s funny that Wonpil is fighting for the poor and innocent when he’s the one who has proven to you once and for all that the rich will stay rich and the poor will stay poor and under the feet of the rich.

The case he betrayed you for was a loss in the end. After a long, tedious trial, his clients were forced to settle because they couldn’t afford to pay for a trial that kept getting prolonged, a strategy the rich and powerful employed in order not to lose doomed cases, in the end making the poor people poorer and worse off than they were before. That’s what Wonpil does. He makes people hope and believe that maybe, just maybe the world isn’t as shitty as it seems, only to shatter them completely when he can’t follow through on his beautiful promises. He breaks them because he made them hope.

Hearing the doorbell ring, you get up to answer it, moving mechanically. After you swing the door open, you stand in the way so Wonpil wouldn’t be able to barge in like he tries to sometimes.

He hands you an envelope which you take with a heavy heart. Every envelope you accept is a debt piled on you that you’ll live the rest of your life paying back.

“I’m working three jobs right now but I hope to find something with a better pay soon so I can start paying you back.”

“Oh, you don’t need to do that.” He rushes to say, but you cut him off. “Yes, I do.”

He sighs and stares at the floor, fiddling with his finger. It annoyed the hell out of you. “Is there something you want?”

His head shoots up, eyes wide at having been caught.

“I—“ He clears his throat after he chokes on the word. “I miss you.”

You hate yourself because of how his words still affect you, how you wish you could fall into his arms and let him comfort you until there are no more tears left in your eyes.

But you won’t cry. You won’t let yourself be vulnerable in front of him. Never again. 

“Goodnight, Wonpil.” You say coldly, closing the door in his face before he can say anything else.

______________________________

[misscampacyn]

Chapter 9

The next morning Alexis wakes up extra early and get ready deciding to take her own car to the motel. She knocks on the door and is greeted by a shitless Matt.

“Glad you’re here, where are the other two?” he asks.

“I don’t know texted Reggie I was going to head here early,” answers Alexis.

Matt nods know why she was here alone.

“What are we doing?” asks Alexis.

“Well I am watching some TV, but hey you still have a couple of hours to kill,” starts Matt as he sits on his bed, “Hey Alejandro why don’t you take Alexis to that little dinner not far from here get some breakfast,” he says.

Alejandro exists the bathroom in his usual suit, “your early,” he states.

“Yeah well I thought we could start early today,” defends Alexis.

Alejandro looks over at Alexis, “well Matt doesn’t start planning until after nine,” he explains.

“Well I’ll come back later then,” says Alexis turning to leave the motel room.

“Hold on, go eat breakfast take Alejandro with you. Brink me a burrito when you’re done,” says Matt.

Alexis looks over at her brother annoyed but turns to look at Alejandro. “What have I told you about meddling?” she questions.

“I just think you two are good for each other,” defends Matt.

“Don’t you think it’s something Alejandro or I should agree on?” fumes Alexis.

“Only one way to find out go get some breakfast, talk, kiss… fuck,” quips Matt, “maybe you’ll loosen up.”

Alexandro just looks over Alexis noticing her anger.

“How fucking dare I’ll have you know I fucked Carl last night,” she disagrees.

“Don’t think he did a good job, you’re still cranky,” jests Matt.

“Fucking asshole!” she sneers.

Matt grins at his sisters’ anger, but he loses it when he sees her walking up to Alejandro and pulls him down planting a rough kiss on the man’s lips.

Alexis only releases Alejandro lips to catch her breath, but then she wraps her arms around his neck and pulls him down for another kiss. Alejandro wraps one arm around her waist a place the other on the back of her neck.

“Alright I got your point, stop kissing, I’ll stop meddling,” says Matt with his back to the pair.

Alexis releases Alejandro’s lip but leans her nose to his, they both catch their breath. “Want to go have breakfast?” she breaths.

Alexandro nods, “my treat,” he says.

Alexis grin and she reaches his hand and pulls him with her to the door.

“Use protection!” provokes Matt, “and don’t forget my burrito!”

Alexis and Alexandro just chuckle and continue walking to her car.

Alexis enters her car and ties her seatbelt, “you’re a good kisser,” she proclaims.

Alexandro look over at her and leans over and captures her lips for another kiss. Alexis moans into the kiss and runs her fingers through his hair. Alejandro grins and kisses her cheek before sitting back to his seat also tying his seatbelt.

“Let’s have breakfast,” says Alejandro.

“Yeah,” swoons Alexis.

The pair eat breakfast at the dinner and purposefully forget Matt’s burrito. They arrive back at the motel at 8:30 am. By now the room was filled by beefy men belonging to the delta team.

“We are tracking Diaz,” say Matt, “where’s my burrito?”

“They didn’t have any,” says Alejandro grinning over at Alexis who is smirking.

“I made a mistake should have never suggested this relationship. Both of you have too much dirt on me, and you know where to hurt me. I’m starving I didn’t have breakfast,” complains Matt.

“I’ll get you something from the vending machine,” says Alexis leaving the room.

All the men start to congratulate Alejandro for his ‘conquest’.

“Hey that my sister,” complains Matt.

The other men just laughed and patted Alejandro’s shoulder, “lucky bastard,” says one of them.

Alexis had decided to instead bring all the team donuts, when she returned to the motel Kate and Reggie were already there.

All the men cheered when Alexis placed the boxes of donuts on Matt’s bed. Alexis walks into the other room where Kate and Reggie are staring at a screen.

“What did I miss?” asks Alexis.

“We found the tunnel,” answers Matt munching on a donut, “I thought you were just going to get me something form the vending machine?” he questions.

“Changed my mind,” says Alexis with a smirk, “was it behind the old car?” she asks.

“Yeah, we are just waiting for Diaz to be called to Mexico,” explains Alejandro who is sitting next to the man on the computer.

Alexis just nods and looks over at the screen. Kate walks up to Alexis an taps her shoulder, “can I talk to you?” she asks.

Alexis looks over her shoulder and tries to read the expression on Kate’s face, Alexis sighs and only nods. The two women walk outside of the motel room.

“I’m sorry for being unfair, I was a bitch to you when you saved me,” apologizes Kate.

“It’s okay,” says Alexis who places her hand on Kate’s shoulder and give her a gentle squeeze.

“What happened with Carl? I say you too leave the bar last night,” asks Kate with a suggestive look.

Alexis looks away from her friend and blushes, “we had sex, he left before you got home,” she admits.

“The guys were saying that you and Alejandro got cozy,” interrogates Kate.

“We kissed, went to breakfast,” admits Alexis.

“You kissed Alejandro? What about Carl?” judges Kate.

“Kate, Carl is a nice guy, and I kissed Alejandro to make Matt shut up,” admits Alexis.

“So, you don’t like him?” asks Kate.

Alexis looks at Kate guiltily, “your judging me,” she points out.

“Of course, I am,” says Kate.

“Listen Kate I’m a grown woman, just let me do what I need to do,” says Alexis walking back into the motel room.

“How’d it go?” asks Reggie.

“She is unbelievable,” exasperates Alexis.

Kate walks in and Matt decides to tell us that Diaz was called to Mexico, and that it was confirmed.

“So what are we going to do now? What the call?” asks Kate.

“We’re going hunting,” says Matt.

The delta leader starts to lay out the plan to his men, so that everyone knew what to do.

“If you see anyone in a Mexican police uniform assume he is a bandit too,” explains Matt, “we are creating a divergence boy, a lot of noise; fourth of July on steroids,” he continues causing the me to laugh.

The delta leader calls for a weapon check so that all the men were ready.

“Those are special opps. Are we going in on this?” asks Reggie.

“Well you not really dressed for the occasion,” quips Matt.

“Well you didn’t fucking tell us,” says Reggie.

“Well you two went crying to daddy yesterday and we don’t wan that,” voices Matt clearly annoyed.

Alexis not knowing that Kate and Reggie had done that stare at them intensely.

“Oh, give me a fucking break,” complains Kate.

“Alright we’ll find you some extra gear,” says Matt.

“We have some tac gear in the car,” dismisses Kate.

“Good,” say Matt, “you guys can hang back when we’re there okay,” continues Matt.

“Then why are we going?” questions Kate.

“cause the CIA can’t operate within U.S. borders,” start Matt then Reggie join in, “without a domestic agency attached,” they finish.

Matt looks at Reggie who has a realization written on his face.

“Told you you’d be useful,” says Matt.

“So that it that’s why I’m here,” says Kate.

“Technically Alexis is here for that you’re just a tag along Jennings made me take,” corrects Matt.

Kate looks over at Alexis in anger, “you knew about this,” she accuses.

“I knew we were needed for being a domestic agency, but I didn’t know the other stuff,” defends Alexis.

“I’m sure you know more than what you put on,” says Kate.

“Kate we were given a choice to join this team, you made your own decision. You could have gotten all these answers from the beginning if you had asked the right questions!” answers Alexis clearly pissed off.

The room grew quite all the men including Alejandro stared at the two females standing face to face. Matt and Reggie were ready to break up a fight.

Kate scuffs, “you’re a real bitch, just like you brother,” she says.

All the men continued to be quite.

“Don’t bring my brother into this!” defends Alexis getting closer to Kate.

“All right, all right come on take a breather,” says Matt stepping in and pulling Alexis away from the other woman.

“She fucking started it Matt,” says Alexis.

Reggie grabs Kate and leads her to the door not wanting Kate to escalate the situation. He knew both women to be levelheaded never engaging in physical or verbal fight with anyone.

Once Kate and Reggie were gone Matt let go of Alexis, she goes to walk out of the motel room but a couple of men in the delta team step in her way.

“I’m going for my tac gear in my car,” says Alexis clearly still agitated.

Matt looks over at Alejandro, who is only looking at Alexis.

“You can take an escort, we don’t want a cat fight to happen in the parking lot,” jokes Matt, “any volunteers?” he asks.

“I’ll go with her,” says Alejandro.

“I don’t need a babysitter to go get stuff from my car. I’m not going to kick her ass,” admits Alexis.

“We know you’re not,” mocks Matt.

Alexis glares at her brother but continues to the door followed by Alejandro.

She walks to her car and opens the trunk. The trunk is littered with tactical items, Alexis picks up a bullet proof vest with a DEA patch on it. She tears it off and collects all the plates needed for it.

“Do you have tactical training?” asks Alejandro.

“Mandatory for when we need to raid places,” explains Alexis.

Alejandro nods understanding. Alexis start to strap on the vest an moves stuff around to get her riffle. One she collects all the equipment she needed she started to go back to the room. Alejandro stops her and moves a strand of hair behind her ear, “you looked like you could kill her by just looking at her,” comments Alejandro.

“Nobody talks like that about my brother,” states Alexis, “he’s all I got.”

Alejandro looks into Alexis’ eyes and smiles warmly at her, “your protective,” he points out.

Alexis meets his gaze and leans up and gives him a peck on the lips, “your going to take down Alarcon and Diaz,” says Alexis.

“Si,” confirms Alejandro. (yes)

Alexis nods, “and will you come back?” she asks.

Alejandro smiles knowing what she is implying, “if you want me to.”

Alexis doesn’t answer she doesn’t have to, he could tell what she wanted.

“Well let get this shit done,” she finally says walking back into the motel room.

Authors Note:

Dang people are going to take this personal; I need to put it out there I enjoyed Emily Blunt’s performance in Sicario. And for this story I wanted to make my version of Kate a bit judgy, which not really how she is depicted in the movie. Anyways hope you like it and keep on reading to find out what happens next!!

[sasukeuchiha-eternalmangekyou]

While listening to the ninja's explanations and the conclusions he'd drawn - some of them long ago, some maybe just the other night - a sad smile crossed Sureen's face. 

Things were… different than what she'd expected. Learning the truth about Itachi hadn't left Sasuke disoriented or aimless. Not at all. The only thing that had changed was the direction and the extent of his mission. It was no longer about restoring justice by killing merely the culprit. Now it was about eliminating the very root cause by destroying a whole village including all of its inhabitants. A deep-drawn sigh escaped her. There was nothing left for her to do. "I think the reason why I came after you, in the first place, was because I was sure that learning the truth about your brother would turn your plans and your convictions upside down so much that you wouldn't… you couldn't… dunno. At least in my head it felt alarming enough to set out straight away. But I guess I was wrong. Because in a way things are still the same now. If anything, they grew larger and deeper… to a whole new stage. I can't even tell if that's a good or a bad thing. 'Cause basically, it's still all about revenge, it still serves to keep you focused and moving forward. You can still stick with the very same survival strategy that has always worked for you. It's just…" Sureen paused and let another sigh escape her lips. She rubbed her tired eyes with her hands, then massaged the bridge of her nose in an attempt to unravel her muddled thoughts. "... It sucks. Seriously. Because in fact your mind is amazing, you have the ability to really think things through and look at them from various perspectives and then come to a conclusion or even change your mind after collecting enough new information. You could totally leave old paths, look for new directions, question old ways of thinking, and come up with new ideas based on what's happening around you - that would be so you. But as it is now, you can't… get there. All you can do is isolate yourself. From everyone around you, and from yourself. From what you'd really feel if you'd go there. "I'm so sorry everything turned out this way. But the only thing that comes to my mind… as an answer of sorts, is… at this point you need to go follow your chosen path, it's the only thing that makes sense, I can see that now." She swallowed hard, slowly moving her fingers through her long, tangled hair strands. But suddenly another cautious smile lit up her face as a thought crossed her mind.

"But you know what, at least according to MY experience, making future plans almost NEVER works. Somehow you just can't include all those existing options and determinants, 'cause things tend to develop in the weirdest directions which you just can't anticipate, no matter how hard you try. 'Cause life is unpredictable. I mean… I'm not trying to say your plans are nonsense and in fact things will turn out differently anyway. But I guess that's what I'll secretly be hoping for," she bashfully shrugged her shoulders. A few minutes later though, listening to Sasuke's theory on what the world would be like if everyone had her ability, Sureen couldn't help but grin broadly. "Oh boy, just why am I NOT surprised about THAT point of view? Feeling like you want to do your self-discovery thing all by yourself with no guidance from no one - that's so you being you man," the girl chuckled. 

"Nah, but seriously… you've got a point. That's why usually we would be trained in fully mastering our ability. And people my age would be perfectly capable of switching it on and off, and only use it when they feel like they wouldn't cross a line with it. And from there it's common sense and intuition. Because no matter which additional abilities or senses you might have, people still do have the right to keep their secrets to themselves, and it doesn't mean you can shamelessly interfere with their lives or their privacy. 

"It's just that… for obvious reasons I was never trained to master anything. I only know the very basics of my ability. So most of the time I'm totally going overboard with it, or more like, it's going overboard with me, since I've got no clue how to switch it off. So yeah. If everyone used that thing the way I do, you'd totally have a point. But I'll figure it out, it's just a tad complicated to get there when there's no one left to teach you… but well, I'll figure it out eventually," Sureen hurried to shrug it off before her grief could take over. She nodded in agreement, a relieved smile tugging on her lips as she listened to Sasuke telling her there was no need for her to join him since he already had team Taka on his side, regardless of his shifting objective.

"And regardless of your shifting objective as well, rest assured that I'll still be on your side when it's over. Because the day after will come when there's no one left for you to kill - either because you completed your mission or because your plans vanished into thin air. But either way, that shall be the day I'll come back. Because trust me, the real difficult part begins when you realize that your life is gone but you're still there. But we'll cross that bridge when you get there, 'cause I guess at this point it's rather meaningless to you. Just remember I'll be back when your plans come to an end," she replied, her eyes bright with confidence. "Pffffft… and just for the record, your sanity isn't all that trivial. At least not to… well, I could name at least four [// million!!!!!] persons including ME," Sureen growled with feigned annoyance, the telltale smile still tugging on her lips. "Otherwise, as for me, I wouldn't have come here to begin with, Mister."

“Things have changed, that much I can assure you,” Sasuke explained, sight still absorbing the skyline of auburn. “But you’re right. It’s still about revenge. Nearly my entire life has been. But there is something deeper that’s altered after discovering a truth my brother never wanted me to know…” 

He closed his ebon eyes, taking a deep breath to collect his rampaging thoughts. They still managed to run wild whenever Itachi was consuming his mind, but now heartache accompanied them in a cascading sorrow he nearly forgot existed. It overflowed, temping to drown him in this ravaging battlefield called love. He was devoted to a lie, something so contradictory while being tugged along by restricting strings.

He shook his head, trying to chase the pain away to no avail. He spoke quietly without looking over to Sureen. “You don’t have to be sorry. We all suffer our individual traumas and some manage to dig themselves out of the darkness while others don’t know how. I may be strategic and levelheaded in most cases, but I’ve always been impulsive when it came to my motives. Leaving the village was a reckless move, but not something I regret. It may very well be due to isolating myself, but that place stopped feeling like home a long time ago.” He raised his hand, clutching his fingers. “I appreciate the friend you’ve been to me in spite of being at odds on many occasions. The mere fact that you understand my path means a great deal. Even if you don’t agree with it.”

Unlike some, she wasn’t trying to stop him and return him to a life he no longer wanted. Although his former teammates have decided upon themselves to save him, they failed to realize that choices were factors. If he wanted off this destructive path, he’d have done so by now. It no longer mattered. His new goal was waging a war against Konoha, one they’d all perish in anyway. Or he’d die trying.

“I figured you’d hope for that,” the Uchiha commented, now glancing towards his comrade. “I know firsthand that plans never go as we expect. The unpredictability of my life never ceases to throw me off track. My trust in what’s real is sometimes shaken. Not only have I been misled, but I’ve been used. Itachi’s intentions were created by his sense of justice. He left me alive out of care. But it was cruel. The method he used to keep me blinded and strung along… If I had known everything, I could’ve made my own decision on how to take the massacre. But instead, he chose for me. So, I know well enough that life changes unexpectedly. Until it does though, I’ll keep striving to avenge my family.”

He listened to Sureen clarify her abilities and outlook on those powers. It was no form a revelation that she felt that way pertaining to what she couldn’t control. He knew little about her, but never pried to discover more. They’ve been traveling together for a short while, but never had she once tried to interfere too harshly when in disagreement. He didn’t pity her capabilities or think less of her for the empathy she formed with them. Rather, he was somewhat reserved about his attention towards her attendance this entire time. Like Taka, she didn’t fight him on much, but her company and endeavors to try to understand was helpful while he was struggling with this mess of information.

“It’s possible that you’ll be able to teach yourself how to control your gifts. In my experience, not many are willing to help what they don’t understand. Perhaps for you it will be different. I was merely unwilling to accept it.” Sasuke fully faced her now, aware that they’d soon be parting ways. The others have left once the sun set the other day and were waiting for him to be prepared to head off. She was the only one who sought him out this morning.

Her declaration of being by his side when this was all over was heard and silently accepted. He knew it was pointless to dispute. If she wanted to witness what became of him once this trial of vengeance commenced and ended, then he’d be fine with that. It’s not as though she were his enemy. She wasn’t from the Hidden Leaf or standing in his way.

Sasuke walked past her, a nod given. “I guess this means goodbye until next we meet.”