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#(mine was shaped like an upside down heart 🥲)
dear-eli
·
10 months
Text
That moment when you have a dream about somebody and it feels so real that your brain legitimately has to take a moment to grieve its loss when you wake up and realize it isn't
#depression
#technically it wasn't you in the dream
#...it was jacob elordi from Euphoria (don't ask me why; i do not know)
#(and even weirder; in the dream he was basically trying to circumspectly ask me and/or the friend(gf?) i was with to eat his 🍑 lmao)
#(he tried to bribe/entice us by picking pears for us out of this massive tree - showing off lmao)
#(mine was shaped like an upside down heart 🥲)
#(so i told him like 'i don't even know how to do that. i have no experience. but like. maybe??)
#('maybe? if im like 💯 sure you cleaned between the cheeks? idk it seems awfully intimate to ask of someone youre not like dating')
#and then he came closer to me and let me hug him for a sec. just for a second. my arm around him & ear to his chest
#and it felt so real!!!
#until i woke up juuust enough to realize: jacob elordi was not real.
#BUT that my brain had used the very real sense memory of hugging you to produce that dream sensation
#and it made me so homesick
#because your left ribs still feel like home to me
#even five months later
#what the fuck is wrong with me
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