#2 girls come up to me and and one says ''ummm excuse me'' and im like ''ya?''

[megascd-moved]

was just called a bitch by a child at work today.

[loverofallthingssmart]

HELLO . idk if u still interact with kotlc fandom but a friend has brought up the concept of desi keefe and i am wondering if u have any ideas as in hcs or concepts or just what u think in general?? :0

i do in fact on rare occasions interact with kotlc fandom HELP love how u phrased that like in fact i saw kotlc on a display shelf thing at b&n and went insane <33

and OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH desi keefe yes yes so true

i think. personally. its funny bc keefe does have desi boy characteristics in that he is annoying, flaky, and a charmer that u cant help but love (i have 2 desi boyz as some of my best friends shut up i have experience TM)

anyway hc time!!!!!!!!!

keefe. more like karthik except white ppl r gonna butcher that so keefe works fine.

photographic memory means this bitch remembers every aunty and uncle to ever exist always dominates the "do you remember me" question when he visits india and sees relatives (which i dont bc i nod and THEN they say "what's my name"...um lol goodbye im never coming back ever.)

keefe would love mango lassi and he would adore chaat and he would be obsessed with chai. keefe strikes me as an a "marie gold" type of person don't you DARE tell me im wrong these were THE shit and theyre perfect to dip in chai licherally the only reason i would drink chai

^^ that is everything to me

okay but imagining keefe in canon as a brown boy with his parents obsessed with his "legacy" comparing that to the immigrant experience where you have to live a set life and ur parents worked hard so you can be the person they want you to be......hmmmmmmmmm anyway (except that doesnt excuse how gisela and cassius r literally abusive . lol. actually when ppl characterize them as brown bc haha they care about perfect grades when they r truly abusive. thinking thoughts....ruminating. anyway) back to happy times !!!

keefe would look so good in gold jewelry he gets his ears pierced when hes like 6 months and instead of red being sophie's color its keefe's!! bc GOD do we look hot in red its literally everything

i think. telegu speaking keefe. omg wait what if he spoke tamil. WAIT. marathi. and kannada. yeah fuck it um. he speaks all of them?? i cant choose they're all so !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im obsessed bc its a given hes south indian like duh.

he would play the veena. loser (affectionate) i say as if i can play the veena

omg what if desi vackers and desi keefe met bc biana does hmm. bharatnatyam (no im not projecting SHUT UP) and meets keefe bc hes playing the veena for her arangetram (which is like. the performance when u graduate its a BIG DEAL with live music and everything its huge mines in like 2 years so yea)

ALSO keefe loooooooooves bollywood movies and okay he DOES like the good ones that make u cry but keefe ESPECIALLY likes the ones from the 90s where its a love triange and the girl gets kidnapped so the boy saves her from the other boy who got rejected stuff like that ("andaz apna apna" is the one im thinking of...loosely), he also likes all three dhoom movies (even the third one with katrina kaif which looking back on is so....insanity), and his guilty pleasure is "chak de india" bc screw him sometimes u just like watching the mcdonalds fight scene where a bunch of girls (on a hockey team) who never get along with each other band together and DEMOLISH guys who insulted and catcalled them while their hardass really mean coach sits there in amusement and happiness okay! (SHUT UP YES I DO THIS ITS EVERYTHING TO ME THIS MOVIE IS SO <33 SORRY)

okay sorry i have realized i apparently have many thoughts on keefe and bollywood movies insanity

ummm oh right! keefe loves loves loves idli especially with coconut chutney and he ADORES appam (GOD appam my beloved) and hes so hungry all the time all the aunties love him bc he eats whatever they make. okay but LOL keefe hates payasum and i think i should be able to have this one thing.

i think i should stop here bc WOW this is extremely long um tldr; no thoughts, head empty, only desi keefe

[magiccallie]

So I wrote down my thoughts as i watched through most of Season 2 of Scooby Doo Mystery Inc, and would like to share them, major spoilers below cut

Notes of Season 2 of Scooby Mystery Inc Shout out to this jock bully(?) who upon encountering a monster threatening a girl, did no hesitate to take on said monster, recuse said girl, and protect her as they escape Fred really needs to talk to someone about his new parents, who are now living in his house with him???? The house of the man who took him from them?????? Bronson might not be exactly straight looking at how he acted around the old mayor vs the new one, but *shrugs* Jock Strikes again, is this gunna be the twist? That''s a really douchy twist to pull a stunt like this Love how-I mean this is just the plan. He wanted girls too so he set up the same scenario. Is this extra set up by the parents to get him to trust them that is some next level douchery/ Scratch that on Bronson, omg Oh shit starting with a furry attack this is going to be a weird episode the gang's meta knowledge coupled with their sure willingness to go along with tropes and shit makes for great dialogue oh *oh* this is the episode where we get a peak to see just how big the picture is, love the lore building. knew this episode was gunna be good is that a demon? the furry isnt the mosnter??? ummm...weve been getting hints, are things getting real? so we've established motive for why someone whould want this plavce closed, but actually tangent but dont a lot of these monsters that they encounter seem like, weirdly powerful and mobile for costumes oh there's the furry that red aura is a...the things that happen around it are something deeper it seems. fascinating. is the red just representative of fire hallucinations? those seemed a bit real in effect for hallucinations... this guy, like my manager, needs to hire a little more staff occult magic book falls from the library to gang, and no one is as concerned as they should be nazi robot nazi robot get BJ on the phone Cassidy is the kinda retired PC that the players can strive to be Shit is getting real quick isnt it. Wait is that a seal. does Cassidy die? I know about a certain other death that makes me sad, but i dont want Cassidy to die too this episode is a rollercoaster of odd events weird hologram disguise for Paraclese is nifty Seeing the tragic fate of past groups is...well obviously sad oh dear, she does die huh its super low key, but it plays at the terrifying corrupting ordeal of the eldritchstuff really well with the lore notes bear troubles oh that badge...is that where they buried him? that's...kinda grim they have stealth suits and killer nazi robots? why have the evil guys not won yet? there is a bomb and they are not evacuating. There is a BOMB and they are not evacuating oh the bear can talk, how dare i assume that a bear is incapable of speech the bear is a twunk, scratch that, still a bear, is...he doing a christiphor walkin impersonation? aaand that’s enough for tonight, starting fresh later We're back, 13 more episodes oh so were getting into why i don’t like astrology Enigma machine omg. sorry, im a sucker for bits like that i wanna have long white hair too, i could rock that look How does Paraclese still have an accent after all these years? It is like destiny's Rasputin and just a stubborn superiority complex? something about visiting villains you can talk to in a prison is-ohp thats just all of um huh, cameo episode- err, anyways, it just paints a delightful scene about the relationship of the protags and antags and villainy as a whole in the world well this is horrific, throw some brownish red stuff around and it would be a silent hill scene update: still gay Thirteen more episodes and they have the disk...that does not bode well for what is going to happen the writer's willingness to reference other hannah barbara characters/shows is great oooo anticaptilism, BF is scoring points excuse me???? cyborg dragon girl???? he cant even call her by her name through most of the episode wtf??????? see now im at the point i gotta ask, is this a real ghost thing, or a fake ghost thing? ah i understand now youd think he would be more willing to explain to th-there we go so the animal companians are more suceptible, but they all have the risk Paraclese talking about these cattle is every gm talking about their homebrew monsters omg writers wth was that conclusion for the cattle im dying sk-ska zombies. ska. zombies. i can pick it up oh like the dancing plauge but worse, nifty these ghosts are rude boys, like, thats actually one of their names. And just caught that it the band name is skatastic oh they mentioned the dancing plauge, thank you wtf 101 the 'lighthearted' tone of this episode speaks dark tidings about the horrors to come aaah, hex girls, omg oh damn, update again: still hella gay bards duels be like, but for real loving this more and more young me is crazy about having the hex girls interact with a magicy thing like the disks, the rest of me is concerned at the events that are taking place scooby agrees, and his dog girl friend...well that was something Ricky displaying increasing regrets is not going to do good things for his lifeespectancy ohp then he drags in the other two well, i didnt see that coming for the criminal identity this little girl just had her mom ditch her for a stranger that robbed them, the heck i should probably eat dinner at some point, or like, anything at somepoint... calling it now, this guy is a circus performer/stunt driver, and if he is the random hired british poolboy it is a fake accent he's lureing women away with emotional intemacy. thats funny in itself, btu that they accept so readily still isnt normal oh and apparently kinks, lured with kinks so hes going to be the librarian dude then?? maybe? k, so at least i got that o.o O.O, well, that was quite the lead up and explanation food on plate, depresso in heart, ready to continue so they have to know right? like, this is a planned trap since Fred is 'the only one who knows where it is' doesnt explain Fred though, or how the fake acts "jeepies you found my scarf" oh there it is, they are after the info from him and its all fake, not some hell vision to show why he has to suceed Fred knew first? good on him plastic surgery, holy crap, next level villainy here holy shit they're all in puragoty thanks to the corrpution?????? Going back to early about the horrifying nature of all this. it is just so immensly sad watching them go through these bits. Cool, but sad. Velma demonstrating why thinking and understanding are not always good in eldritch horror games so he's got a guilt complex? heart felt talk with Mayor Dad awwww, poor Velma doesnt think she's pretty guessing...well id say the wife of Enrique but that seems too easy some how, stiill shes the only offered suspect beside Enrique himself thus far *deep sigh* i will never guess any culprit i bother to write down correctly would be a real move of the writers to Uzumaki the town two day deadline given, props to velma for having the foresight to model the disks in a digital format incase theyre lost mad max mystery machine sounds like a doom metal synth wave fusion song things are going too well... How many giant evil doors will this lair have? alchemy. of course. should have guessed. is...is this the episode where Marcie...oh no oh at least shes trying good on her, she's going down in style and flame... oh. ya know, even knowing it was coming and talking it up a sentence before, not a happy event this is a nifty dungeon last episode, hell of an opening/recap wh-what fghaseguk this went batshit didnt it. i wish i had the willingness to write at unhinged as these writers one more media that i am surpised didnt end in a poly relationship this climax is eerily familiar to the live action movies at times and then they all died and went to heaven aww Rickee and Cassidy *and* Velma and Marcie, aww, my heart will heart to think about that one for long, but awwwww Miskatonik University, or however the heck it is said. i thought it was going to be a one off joke but wasn't expecting that.

[captainillogical]

Devil’s Ballroom ch.2

A year after the events from the earth’s final attack, Little Homeworld is finally complete, and there’s a new jazz bar where gems and humans mingle and drink. - As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now.

Spinel/Reader

collab with wife @firstofficertightpants

The place actually happened to be like, right on the edge of Little Homeworld. Outside had full glass windows, tall, that reached the ceiling. Inside the lighting was dim, and a bit smokey. You figured it looked alright enough to head in, and gave the bouncer your ID. He nodded and you walked in. It smelt of cigars, and of cinnamon, and it wasn’t entirely unpleasant. A pretty woman in a low-cut red dress was playing the piano on the stage, and it was some contemporary jazz piece. The low murmur of people talking filled the air in between the swells of music, and the place actually seemed busy with people and even gems enjoying themselves. You liked the vibe. It was.. comfortable. At ease. You looked over at the bar, rather than any of the tables, and saw a spot near the end. Perfect. Right by the bathroom. You headed over and plopped down on the stool. There were three empty at the end, so you took the one in the middle, which had the best view of the stage from back here.

While waiting for the bartender to come back down this side, you took the chance to look  at the people around you. A couple familiar faces.. small town you know? And some new ones. New gems too. You can see Mr. Fryman sitting at a table with Kofi and Nanefua, and they look like they’re playing poker. You try not to snicker since Kofi looks absolutely blasted, and Mr. Fryman is cursing up a storm because Nanefua is clearly winning. You see her wink at Mr. Fryman. You suspect a rigged game.

Your phone chimes a couple times. You pull it out of your bag, and check to see who’s bothering you. Ah. The group chat.

    Alex: ughhh you guys my gmas killing me

    Alex: no seriously mexico fucking blows rn 

    Alex: i cant step outside without feeling like my balls are melting off my body

    Alex: and my brother won’t stop listening to the book of mormon soundtrack

    Alex: im going insane

Your friends are so melodramatic. You type out a couple of replies.

    Y/N: You should be used to mexican summers by now, you go every year.

    Y/N: And for the record, your brother is valid. Book of Mormon slaps.

    Alex: what the fuck youre supposed to be on my side u ass

    Alex: i thought our special thing was wicked. OUR SPECIAL THING, Y/N

    Y/N: I’m allowed to like multiple things. Including musicals. 

    Alex: never. fuck you. also what are you even doing rn come play minecraft with me

    Y/N: Yeah as much as I’d like to, I can’t.

“Y/N! So you finally came to see what this place is all about! What can I get ya?” you hear a familiar voice ask. Turning around to face the voice, you see Bismuth wearing her usual overalls and a rather nice looking bow tie. 

“Hey Bis, how’s it going? I like what you’ve done with the place. It’s nice. And uh, I’ll just take a hard cider for now.” You smile at her and set your phone down for a minute.

“Thank you! After we finished Little Homeworld, I had to find something else to focus on in my down time.” She explains while grabbing your drink from the fridge under her side of the bar, and opens it. “So tell me,” She sits the drink in front of you and leans on the counter. “What brings you out here today?”

You take a rather long sip from your drink before meeting the large gems eyes. On the stage, a tall, beardy man replaces the woman that just finished her piece. He immediately starts this jaunty, irish tune. He’s singing loudly, and it’s not bad. A couple of people are clapping to the tune.

“I just really needed to get out.” You replied, taking another sip from your drink. “I was kinda hoping I’d meet someone new, maybe get another friend to hang out with, since my friends wanted to ditch me this summer.” As you’re saying this, more people join the clapping. It’s getting a bit rowdy. “Or maybe at least get drunk enough to forget how lonely I feel.” You add, shrugging. 

“Well, I can supply the drinks, and at least a bit of company.” Bismuth winks, and turns to the patron 6 seats up waving her over. 

You check your phone again, and there’s more from Alex. AND Harper? She must still have phone service wherever she’s at.     Alex: what are u fuckin doin that so important that u cant play minecraft with ur best friend

    Harper: yeah, Y/N. the heck. Also alex, get lost, she’s MY best friend bitch

    Alex: u had ur chances but u left us so we’re a duo now. u can go

    Harper: excuse me!? I WILL end you.

    Y/N: Oh my god, chill. I’m just out right now, so I can’t okay? 

    Y/N: And nice of you to join us, Harper.

    Harper: fuck you I miss you okay. And I miss constant wifi :(

    Alex: OUT!? What do you mean OUT. its night. u play games with ME during this time

    Alex: for real what the fuck are you doing

    Harper: yeah, you don’t go out without us. Wtf are you doing?

    Y/N: I’m at a bar!!     Alex: WHAT

    Alex: dont tell me its the one place that just opened

    Alex: Y/N do NOT betray me you TOLD ME you were gonna go with me!!

    Y/N: I was. But I was also bored and you’re both gone, soooo. 

    Alex: wow

    Alex: i cant believe youve done this to me

    Harper: hmmm. ;)

    Harper: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ;)

    Y/N: What.

    Harper: you tryin to find girls again? 

    Harper: like that one time you went to empire city just to peruse the mall?

    Alex: LMAOOOOO

    Y/N: No.

    Alex: LMAOOOO Y/N GOOD LUCK TRYING TO FIND A GF LOLL

    Y/N: I’m not trying to find a girlfriend you fucks. Christ.

    Y/N: Also Alex, you’re one to talk. You can’t KEEP a girlfriend.

    Alex: ur just mad i have a passionate and intimate relationship w/ my hand

    Y/N: And it will probably stay that way. 

    Y/N: Besides, so far, no one cute here. So it’s a bust.

    Harper: a bust. Lmfao u just outed yourself :)

    Y/N: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

You put your phone down before seeing whatever Alex attempts to reply back with. It sounds like the current boisterous song is coming to a close, and really, most of the people here are clapping along with this guy. It’s fun. And despite the playful ribbing from your shit-talking friends, you’re starting to have a nice time. You finish your drink, and nod over to Bismuth who catches your eye and nods back. You look over onto the stage, the man having cleared the piano, and see Lapis wiping down the piano and seat. Guess he spilled his drink while playing. Lapis, unlike Bismuth, actually dressed up a bit for the job. Her hair was pulled in a cute, small bun, and she was wearing what looks like a tailored tux with no jacket. The vest fit her quite well. She seemed.. happy. Good for her.

No one had taken up the stage again yet, but the place was still lively with chatter. You see someone out of the corner of your eye move towards the stage, but Bismuth comes over again so you tear your gaze away. 

“Another cider? Or do you want something else this time, Y/N? She asks, cleaning a glass with a rag, and moves on to the next one. 

“Ehh, yeah, give me another cider.” You say as you pull out your phone again. Bismuth sets down the drink in front of you.

    Harper: what a goddamn disaster. she got that from me i think

    Alex: no, youre both disasters separately

    Y/N: Fuck you guys. Give me a break.

You hear the piano start to play again, and someone pulling the mic forward. You look up to see pink hair.. And someone kind of familiar. She’s wearing black slacks, a white collared shirt, and suspenders. The shirt is partially open, and you see part of a pink gem showing through on her chest. It looks like she’s got mascara running down her face. 

And then.. she starts to sing. 

It’s lovely. It’s slow and a bit sad, but she seems to be enjoying herself. She’s definitely done this before. Quite a few of the people around quiet down some, so you can hear her pretty clearly. You drink some, and text your friends.

    Y/N: Guys, I lied. There’s a cute gem here who can sing.

    Alex: holy fuk

    Alex: what

    Y/N: She looks kind of familiar though? I can’t quite place it though.

    Harper: dude theres like near 100 gems now in little homeworld lol

    Harper: you’ve probs seen most in passing? :P

    Alex: are you serious Y/N? cant flirt with human women so u turn to aliens? lmfao

    Y/N: Ohhhhh my god. Die.

The gem on stage sings the chorus with gusto - man she’s really getting into this. You’re kind of taken a bit with her performance. It just pulls you. But also.. She really seems familiar now and it’s bothering you.

    Y/N: No I’m serious she seems really familiar and not in that In Passing kind of way.

    Harper: what does she look like?

    Alex: yeah a description would be nice 

    Harper: TAKE A PIC

    Alex: holy shit YES 

    Y/N: I can’t take a pic. She’s too far away, it’ll be blurry.

    Alex: literally just zoom in lord almighty

    Y/N: Okay. Hold on a sec.

You turn on your camera app, and face the stage. Looks like the gem is actually finishing up her song. Perfect, you’ll snap a pic once she stands up. She finishes, and most of the people are clapping for her. You zoom in, and it’s grainy, but decent enough to make out most of her. You snap the pic.

The flash was on.

A couple people turn to look at you, and you try turning away quickly, horrified, and see the gem looking in your direction before walking off into the crowd of people. You cannot imagine a worse scenario. 

    Y/N: FUCK FUCCCCKKKKKK.

    Y/N: (image sent)

    Y/N: I GOT YOUR FUCKING PIC BUT THE FLASH IS ON.

    Y/N: I’M PRETTY SURE SHE SAW THAT IT WAS ME THAT TOOK THE PIC.

With shaking hands, you take another sip of your drink and wait for a reply. Why is life like this.

    Harper: uh.

    Harper: ummm.

    Alex: wait

    Alex: one fucking second

    Y/N: WHY ARE NONE OF YOU CARING ABOUT MY PLIGHT. 

    Y/N: I’M TRYING NOT TO COMBUST ON THE SPOT HERE.

    Alex: shut up for one second

    Alex: harper isnt that

    Harper: uhh. yeah i think so.

    Y/N: WHAT!? WHO IS IT. WHY DOES THAT MATTER AT THIS POINT.

    Alex: lmao i cant believe i have to tell u this

    Alex: bitch do u remember that shit that happened last summer

    Alex: where half the town almost died from that gem shit

    Alex: that’s her     Alex: that’s the bitch who almost killed like, the entire planet

    Harper: you know that night your dad almost died??

As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now. 

[peach-pops]

(1/3 💙) Hi friend! Can I please have a romantic matchup with major characters! Any team is fine! Im a 5’1 straight female. long, straight dark brown hair with curly ends. Usually in a ponytail, but let out in private. I have Warm brown eyes And big black glasses. I usually wear a hoodie and jeggings, I love oversized stuff. I don’t really do dresses, Id rather skirts with leggings. I’m self conscious, but hide it with humour. I’m kinda petite and fragile but I’m very reckless. It backfires.

(2/3 💙) Im tomboyish, stubborn, sarcastic and feisty but caring when needed. I’m usually energetic and optimistic but can be snappy and more mean than usual. I’m seen as blunt and mean, but don’t take my words at face value. Im more perceptive than I seem, but Im like a clumsy airhead usually. I have a sharp tongue. Im better at analysing people than text. I love thrill and games (I don’t try sometimes but when I do I am very determined and competitive) but love music, reading and drawing.|| (cont)  (3/3💙) mine would be songs like “dominos” and “don’t start now”, something that is chill bit also upbeat. I’m a bit of a tsun sometimes, I argue and I’m difficult to offend so exchanging playful insults is fun to me. I’d like someone who matches my energy, when I’m chill and when I’m chaotic. Someone who has dark humour and can playfully argue with me without getting offended. I’m secretly affectionate, but not clingy. I don’t mind PDA, just not too much. Thank you! ❤️❤️ -Troosh (my nickname)

I ship you with Tendou!

I have to obviously point out this height difference UMMM HE’S A WHOLE FOOT TALLER THAN YOU AND HE LOVES IT 

If you’re ever having a conversation with someone or even just minding your own business, he’ll always come up from behind you, wrap his arms around your waist and rest his chin on your head

When you guys kiss, he always makes you stand up on your tippy toes cause he thinks it’s cute watching you try your hardest to kiss him. One time when you both were walking up a flight of stairs, you went a few steps ahead and turned to face him so you two could kiss at the same height level 

From first glance, his teammates think you guys are polar opposites until you both start ripping jokes off of each other and everyone collectively ooo’s cause yeah you two are pretty similar 

He never worries about you fitting in with his teammates because you’re practically one of the guys and he loves seeing you talk and be friendly towards them even when he isn’t around

I would say your sense of humor is a bit more dark than his but that doesn’t stop him from laughing along with you 

“ Hey L/N-chan, what’s yellow and can’t swim?”

“ A schoolbus filled with kids.”

“ HOW DO YOU THINK OF THAT SO QUICKLY?! I can’t believe my girlfriend is a sadist!” 

He is a huge SAP for girls with glasses and he always makes any excuse to wear yours because it always makes you laugh even if you seem a bit annoyed plus he thinks you look cute without them too!

Just like you, Tendou is pretty affectionate in private. I know once yall move in together he can’t keep his hands off of you but in public, you two just stick with either hugs from behind or cheek kisses cause uwu right?

If you two aren’t at school, you both will hold hands because he likes being close to you but you’re also known to trip over literally anything so it’s also a safety precaution

Surprisingly, there a lot of times where you two will hang out at each others houses and just do your own separate tasks but still next to each other

Like if you’re drawing on the couch, he’ll be watching tv and he’ll still keep his hand on your thigh 

You would never be bored with Tendou, even if there are chill moments, just being there with him while running errands is quality time 

He’s not too protective of you because he knows you’re smart and sometimes mean enough to scare other people away but he will always keep an eye out for you no matter what 

[hennesseyok]

ummm hi !! so i’m nori n i’ve been outta the rp game for a hot minute but miss rona has me without shit to do so im back !! plz excuse this literal garbage intro but we out here !! i am so down to plot the fck outta her ( she needs bandmates for her band ... n also a name ... ahem ... ) n honestly am v open to anything, so plzZz dont hesistate to message me on here (im not hip with the kids so i dont have discord ??? yet ??? ) n e wayz heres my cutie sadboy babie hennessey eeek !! i love this group already ah !!

kristen stewart. cis woman. she/her. ❝ can you hear painfully obvious by harmless coming from apartment # 408 ? that must mean hennessey rhodes is home. the twenty-six year old is currently a member of a local band and they live with 2 roommates. they’ve been living in the village for four years and residents have gathered the scorpio’s enigmatic yet detached demeanor. ❞ nori. 21. she/her. gmt -6.

s t a t i s t i c s full name: hennessey leighanne rhodes nicknames: rhodes, h, hez, daddy [ anything thats not “henny” lol she hates that name eek ] dob: oct 25 1993 sign: ☼ scorpio, ☾ scorpio, ↑ capricorn sexuality: queer [ wlw, nblw ] birthplace: new albany, mississippi known languages: english, some bayou french siblings: none a e s t h e t i c s + pinterest drunken walks home from the bar, matching stick n poke tattoos, worn in band tees, red-tinted bedroom lights, unmade beds, empty swimming pools at 3 am, sunrises on apartment rooftops, shelves of filled leatherbound notebooks, lightwash denim, half wiped off sharpies on skin, bruised knuckles on soft hands, blood pacts with best friends, freshly bleached hair, gentle forehead kisses, the smell of vanilla and tobacco b i o ☆ the child of two born again evangelical christians in the small town of new albany, ms, hennessey was brought into a world of devout religion and an “all american” mentality ☆ located in northern mississippi near the tallehatchie river, new albany had a population of just under 7,000 when hennessey was born. being in the bible belt of america, mississippi had a ruthless reputation for homophobia, transphobia, and racism. all things that hennessey was brought up surrounded by. ☆ her parents were through and through rednecks that tried to get their lives on track after her mother was knocked up at 19 [ thus her name… ahem ] ☆ the early years of her life were spent fully devoted the church, she was baptized at birth and was fully indoctrinated into her religion until her freshman year of highschool ☆ hennessey starting experiencing same gender attraction as early as she can remember, but never acted on anything until junior year. after a local high school party she found herself in the bedroom of the town preachers daughter. ☆ a whirlwind romance began, the two were inseparable and were thought to be the best of friends by everyone in town. but, when playing with fire, someone is bound to get burned. or the whole town can go up in flames, and that’s exactly what happened. ☆ the two were walked in on one night and it was enough to strike the match. all of new albany was disgusted and enraged; they wanted the rhodes family out of their town, even going so far as to claim that the devil had come in the form of the family to destroy the good people of mississippi. ☆ excommunicated by her family, she finished highschool at 18 and took of running as fast as she could. she bought the cheapest bus ticket she could afford, and landed on the couch of a local blues musician in nashville, tn. he took her in and taught her everything he knew about music and, by proxy, black culture. ☆ after leaving new albany, her worldview shifted foundationally. she’s been in and out of central booking on riot and protest charges, so she’s pretty much stuck doing this music thing due to her criminal record ☆ from the ages of 19 to 22 she spent between nashville, atlanta, brooklyn and detroit, playing music, going on benders, and getting between the sheets of as many girls as she could  [ she basically went on a rampage lol ] in the process she picked up a pretty gnarly coke habit that she’s still trying to shake. so she says, at least. ☆ she landed in new york where she finally started a semi-successful band and decided she wanted to start building a life n thats when she ended up here !! q u i c k  f a c t s ok imma try to wrap this up cus i know its getting long lol but n e wayz heres like a tl;dr summary ☆ grew up in a racist, homophobic, backwards town; was outed for being gay and hasn’t spoken to her parents since she was 18 ☆ she’s a v talented musician and her rising in capricorn makes her want to be successful as fuck, even if she has to do some shady shit to get there ☆ she started a band and their mild success landed her in brooklyn. she needs bandmates !! i purposely didn’t name the band so connections could help make it a #Band.... ehehe ☆  she’s a ride or die friend and 10000% one of the #boiz, you can usually find her doing some dumb shit with her best friends. once u have her loyalty, she’ll be by your side no matter what happens ☆ v flirty. like, will flirt until u invite her back to ur place only to bail and go hang with her bandmates lol. ☆ she finds it hard to open up [ i know… how fuckin CLICHE ] but all she wants is someone to actually hold her n tell her that its okay not to be okay ??? give me that soft gay shit ??? ☆ shes a lil bit of a player but only becus she’s bored. its never her intention to hurt someone but girls often get attached and her scorpio ass isn’t the best at letting em down easy ☆ once she left, hennessey basically tried to shed all trace of her hometown from her, but she has a slight mississippi twang to her accent that only comes out when she’s really mad or rly close with someone [ she hates it sm and hates when ppl comment on it lol ] ☆ she’s forever writing songs, like 9 times out of ten if u cant find her, shes prob holed up in her bedroom, cigarette in hand, writing some sappy shit about a girl she hooked up w after her latest show [ kiiiinda wanna do a plot w someone she’s super into but the person couldnt give less of a fck about her ?? like yes bithc we love a role reversal ]

um ya thats it i will def be developing her way more i know this is so shit but im tryin my best here plz dont read me if shit don’t add up. love yall hehe. also plz plot w her she needs besties and hookups and love interests !!

[xz017]

.

oof. okay so imma do the latest tea???

got out of shower to hear my mum talkin to Agnes spillin the tea abt their friend/coworker

the one with that Kid my mum wanted to have a playdate with or whatever the annoyingly studious and clearskinned halfasian lookin girl i really envied.

her mum has a live in boyfriend who is basically like...an alcoholic mental case rip god i hate alcohol and i hate people who drink it like i only do it so i hate myself more and die but like this guy basically playin with knives n guns in the house and the kid who is like 19 idk why im callin her kid is so Over it like apparently she hasn’t been coming home and like

basically me in 2016 era when my mum was too generous n Helpful lettin ppl back into our lives and our House so i spent christmas morning 5am walkin in the cold n watchin 3 films until it got dark and stuff like that

girl be actin homeless---mood

so it came to a head today so Agnes is spillin the tea n her husband in the bg(omg it weird hearin him rip he was my military hs instructor wild) n my mUM is so selfrighteous n mad like

‘blablahblah well rosalie is being dumb she should put her daughter first she being sick in the head it her Choice’

n im like eavesdroppin havin warflashbacks of the dumb hypocrisy she has DOne lmao

‘has she no thought like what if Tyler gets raped/sexually abused by that man she’d let her daughter be in that environment???’

i mean it wouldnt be fair of me to be like...eyemoji on this cos she technically doesn’t know? but 19 may 2018 never4get lmao

anyway so my mum’s like our room is for rent and it’ll be far cheaper they dont even have to pay rn!!!

cue me being like...um...Money...generosity...i dont...LIke

i was conflicted here like idk i met the girl like 3-5 times im envious of her work ethic n her better asian disposition than mine cos she obviously prettier but she has better prospects and that’d suck if her life be like that

but also??? like...life be like that it was like that to me like who saved me????????????????????? 

um...no one

like why is that on me or US TO BE NICE n helpful im so tired like damn which is relevant to the next point anyway

cos earlier had a convo with my mum i was eyemojing healthcare profs i was like ‘pls stop bein on ye phone pls tell me info on ye opinion on respiratory therapists...what abt PA’

n deadass she be eyemojing me like STICK TO YOUR COURSE

n i was like...-ugly pleadin emoji eyes- n i was tryin to explain that i didn’t want to be so focused on one thing that if i decide this medical thing is what i want to pursue i’d need 1-2 years just for the PREREQS which is like 5 classes and 1000 clinical hours or minimum 6 month healthcare paid job. like if i decide i want to go to school for that i already have the Stuff and just Apply.

n she was like...you had your chance i bothered you to be a nurse a few years ago you were stubborn if you did as i said you’d be earning good money now but you wasted time

n i was like...oof i can’t say anything to that it’s tru. it real life tea it fax i wasted time n im old n im ruunnin out of time i hate myself alot i hate hate hate

and idk we got to talkin abt money n life cos she was like you have to find something you can learn to LOve

n i was like??? WHY I GOTTA SETTLE N FOOL MYSELF TO DO SO im super annoyed abt that mindset

cos the thing about a bloody Arts degree is there’s too fuckin many broad possibilities n they all aint even that good. like deadass if i was a STEM major ugh like if i was a Bio major prospects are so clear: forensics, research, premed,labtech. Meanwhile polsci for example: uhhh teacher? prelaw? politician? uhhh government work? n there’s like 111 different subdivisions of that n it’s like??? wat the fuck

deadass what am i gonna do with international security is that even gonna pay well like...the fuck do i know is it relevant ??? Doubts

n she was all like...PEOPLE JUST GOTTA DO WHAT THEY HAVE TO TO SURVIVE YOU GOTTA FIND YOURS N STICK WITH IT

n i was lowkey panique n frustrated cos i really REALLY hate being stuck in 1 ting n im like i HAD ACTING YOU SAID NO

n she was like pFF i wanted you to have something REAL cos if you dont make it in acting you’d be on the STREETS

n i was like...lmao lil did she know imma be on the streets next year smh this year actually

n she was like talkin abt the harsh reality of the workforce and how you gotta make do at how ppl treat you (patients) n how you might not even like your coworkers but you gotta deal with it because that’s what ppl do to survive

n she was talkin abt undeserving patients with no healthcare n i was like did you just hear yourself so you want them to die cos they dont got money and she was like 

no??? why get hooked up in the ICU when you’re braindead wasting government money taxes we payed for you don’t understand cos you dont have a job and dont get your salary cut cos of taxes and these people come in acting like they got something to give when they yell at your face acting like they know what they’re talking about they act entitled when they have nothing homeless ppl getting money and illegal immigrants are selfish bringing their kids to be hurt here

n im like...theyre life is ...shitty what are you talkin about n she was like so? why dont they stay and make it better??? one of my very first patients asked me why i was in america and i said i come from a poor country and they said why didn’t you stay and try to make it better? and i couldn’t say anything cos u know what they were right why dont illegal immigrants do that??? n im like...

cos theyre literally...RUNNIN and they want ppl they care abt i.e. children to be far away from that as soon as possible bruh ye think imma wait for change deadass there a reason why we suffer duterte he actually get shit done??? we dont have to wait for change the same way ppl who speak nice n are polite do but is stuck with bureaucracy and lowkey bein corrupt deadass stay in ye lane

n she’s like well i hope you’re right im done bein an idealist im a realist now i believed in good i wanted to help the world now no more

n im like...no you’re not a realist, you’ve just been hangin out with a republican

and she gave me a sideeye 

but deadass im ...scared like i really hate the empathy because when she was being serious n talkin n being honest abt things for once i started to unwillingly see things from her point of view i really felt it n i was scared i’ll be like that im scared she’s right

im scared i’ll end up Real n selfish like...i already am ? n bitter? like i care about so very few Personally and am willin to let others suffer to keep it safe n prioritised?

im scared.

like especially with racism all these years my mum’s been telling me it’s not that im racist just wait til you work with them they act so entitles and loud and make everything about race

n i almost told Her abt it earlier i skyped w her earlier we had a tea spillin moment about our ethnic relations bein racist but then idk we talked alot i guess the text got buried or unseen

like i said i was scared n didn’t get to unpack it like im scared because ive been livin with my roomate and like...ive been excusing it as a personality thing and that if it were anyone else different skin colour id still hate them just the same which i still maintain is true but like?

my RM is loud n she makes everything abt race like deadass me n my FM be just eating dinner and she passes by us and goes on a rant about harvard asians being a Blok to black ppl from getting There n im like...im tryna have dinner so i can get energy to deal with this stressful ass school

n she always talks like she knows what she’s talking about like ‘jewish ppl control the federal bank’ n im like...it 1am in the dark quiet of our shared room deadass i dont wanna tell the binch thats antisemitism cos she gonna be like im black how can i be racist smh

im!!! scared alright like i hate my roomate for proving my mum right when i try so hard to set things right like maybe that’s why i dont tell anyone about my situation other than Her. i never told my parents about the berkeley livin situation they already warn me enough to be careful n i just keep tellin them thats racist

i have so much........THOUGHTS n........DILEMMAS...n FEARS but like i just have this blog i cant trust anyone else to talk abt it n the only person i am willing to talk to abt it will be busy and im so ashamed abt these things but she was so sweet about givin me the heads up about her schedule 

like i hated that i had to get an ugly ass haircut today cos she came back to me n we couldve talked so i guess rip she was complacent n did stuff cos she replied late from then on like that dumbass haircut was 15 minutes ugh. our talkin pattern today was like...dashed lines timereply wise? i asked her if she packed earlier (pre haircut)n she said yes but rip a few hours later she was like...I need to pack 

wat is the truth rip

the tablet bein emo like...mood but my child rip.

my love be packin n spendin time with fam before leavin for london tomorrow

n even after that she doin...Stuff. rip.

which is ye know good for her rip.

i just hope she dont go iceskatin deadass one slip n she can crack her head open or break her neck or paralyse her spine like...??? why do humans wanna do dumb activities

like omg she admitted to me today she a serial jaywalker and WORSE with music n headphones like

binch thats why i didnt wanna enable you further by gettin ye airpods deadass bye

n she was like??? tryna equate it with my risky risk like ummm

mine is for science n validity

hers is just carelessness n chosin lazy convenience over idk...the responsibility of self vigilance like...

bruh ppl shouldnt promise someone 91 years if they be continuin to do dumb stuff consciously oof rip

but other than that like...im...really proud of this resolution she be undertakin officially on the 14th?

im nervous abt it cos i really want it for her too. i want her to get the proper sleep n i always hated her givin excuses like ‘IM FINE ON 4 HOURS OF SLEEP’ ‘I NAPPED 3 HOURS 38293820 HOURS AGO IM FINE I MADE UP FOR IT’ um...blokt. get proper sleep binch i love you tf???

prioritise work cos ye gonna regret not givin it yer all??? n ye payin for this???

what fun??? we capitalists now we want that money rip.

i see that shift you know rip i saw it comin a year ago.

that dont mean we republicans rip we still care about others n the inequality? but like i foresaw us getting acquainted with the harsh reality of the world n how difficult it is to get a job--which she experienced along the way.

n rip she wants many things bookmarkin them n honestly same rip

i want a stable warm home for this family n a shiny diamond to get disassociated by extra im a simple man

meanin im selfish n im ready to prioritise meanin im ready to make the choice for others to fall apart/behind if it means puttin This first rip

god pls dont make me a republican this so ugly

# 1 she’d hate me #2 i’d hate me

now im sad

im dead.

omg rip earlier too as she said goodbye i told her i loved her and she was like ‘i love you more’

DEADASS I WAS LIKE LMAO!!! girL i dont think you understand im literally Ready to put you and our possible future First like...im not messin around what skitrips with rich ppl what friends my love is potent n extreme n COncentrated like im sorry ik you feel love for me but you cant top This rip she not ready 

like the um ‘partially wanna make my life’s work abt knowin what might hurt n kill ye so i can kill it first or blok it well’ kinda love

the ‘im already savin for at least HALF a first month deposit in an overpriced london in case you wanna settle down wit me Mayhaps n im not touching it for ANYTHING’ kinda love

the ‘im thinking of a winter home in the tropics so you suffer less n im plannin the floorplans already rip just in case’ kinda extraness

but anyways the gall of this cute lovely human rip ‘i love you more’ ummm try Again smh

bruh i love her too much i bet that’s scary for her rip it might be a Burden tbh she so young rip 

meanwhile im old n ready to rot but like...

i wanna be mortal wit ye before i do

but ye know wat lads i saw myself in the mirror today like 5 times OOF. this meatform...keepin me...Humble. 

bitter but like...humble

‘like of course sHe not ready not only is my personality like dis but also...my outward form how could she introduce me as a Spouse’

‘wow i look like that oof it good i remembered i am undeservin of full intense love like in the films n fanfiction they always between attractive ppl after all it only 1/2 it not Equal’

‘wow bruh ye really upset she spendin time n resources elsewhere when you be lookin like That? ye dont have much to offer bro take the L’

oof so that’s the personal tea i can think of?

had a meghan marke talk rip i can’t believe i was right??? i had twin vibes!!! but i was hoping for like a variety situation rip im worried a lil abt the whole birthin Late ting but she can afford the highest care rip it fine she rich.

my love was talkin abt how pretty MM was n i was like rip is she triggerin Her a lil rip worrirooni

rip speakin of babies like she was showin me this smol gummybear n im like same das me heart n she was like :( n i was like it only fits you

n she was like so no children then:(

n i was like!!! rip if it Ours of course that Counts n i was a lil shook like rip she said she didn’t want them Really so i always get guilty when i talk abt the future or realise i mentioned kids or carelessly name drop Hyaline n Benzion like...im dead rn just typin that like what if she read this big shame bro

but ye know what this is already long n she gonna be busy maybe that’s the key. TOo Much puts ppl OFF so ye mayhaps we sneaky ! ?

anyway i was tryin to get her thoughts on it rip but like she was all iDK ASK ME IN 13 Yrs n i was like...

sighemoji + sandemoji + resignedemoji

rip we talked FAaC a lil. cos she Dared!!! to liken me to her brother just cos i showed her my cheap youth boy shoes smh

At first i was super offended n disgusted but then i was like rip eyemoji if ye into that

then she was like ew nO

then i was like um ye already play the ‘daddy u like me young huh’ card

which is like idk is like technically? joking but it’s like that post ye know abt ppl bein ‘whether or not im actually jokin or flirtin depends if you into it’ but also like schrodingers racism like ‘it was a joke bro!!!’ but they actually bigots.

so it DIFFICULT for my brain to Confirm rip like...eyemoji what is the truth

but like??? im rip. willin. rip. to. rip. Try. rip.?

really i am rip. it Her. bruh. im only hopin she dont have a golden shower kink but. trust i...Will follow thru.

nO IM REMEMBERIN THE DOO DOO POST DESPAIR

rip anyway that whole thing reminded me of FAaC origins which was porn n then somehow sHe was like imagine if egggsy was a singer he’d sing like ‘age is just a number’ shit n i SPILLED THE TEA ABOUT A TING IN PT 3 im so weak sand

i miss the gays

i wanna give them justice n happiness but the 2027 excuse is rl nice for my ugly procrastination issues oof but i wish them well

add: rip had another talk with my mum i really wanted her to understand my thought process about wanting to get the prereqs for medtraining done beforehand

n she was like...I UNderstand but Normal people--

n i was like ‘IM NOT NORMAL I DONT KNOW HOW TO CHOOSE I HAVE NO IDENTITY’

n she’s just like SHOOKE n mad n clearly dont understand that im fukt up in the head ‘...IC AN’T BELIEVE YOU!!! iF YOU’RE ABNORMAL YOU WONT GET HIRED N YOU WONT HAVE A NICE JOB’

n im like...well i mean what can i say to that it’s not like it’s not tru rip

Big sand honestly.

it gonna be a long few days imma do my best to leave her alone she needs her time rip i love her so much rip sand

i feel like a dumb ugly dog god fljækadfkøad h8

[ggswritings]

Cinnamon

She was gorgeous. Her bright grin that had a hint of mischief behind it, her dark brown eyes which were usually highlighted with black liner, her long dyed blonde hair, everything seemed so uniquely...her and you where a goner.

You had seen her first in the shop. You were taking an extra shift at the bakery, the early morning one, which you absolutely hated. But chaeyoung knew you would do anything for her and she somehow convinced you to pick it up.

You were sitting behind the counter, restocking the blueberry scones which had managed to sell out in the 45 mins you’d been open. Heejin smiled at you from the register, silently thanking you for taking the shift. You smiled lightly in response and walked back over to the second check out to help more customers.

Finally at 9:30 things seemed to slow a bit and you could breathe. Heejin thanked you again and went to the back to grab more muffins for the display. You let your head fall into your hands, taking another deep breath and lifting it as the bell to the shop door rang. When you looked up, the most gorgeous girl you’d ever seen met your eyes. You blushed almost instantly and you could see her eyes shine and her nose crinkle slightly. She walked over to the counter, scanning the displays of pastries as she walked by.

“I’ve never been here before, is there anything in particular you’d recommend?” Her voice was extremely unique, it was quite nasally and deep in a way that made you want to listen to her for hours. Somehow you found it in yourself to answer her, internally praising your calmness.

“What do you like? My personal favorite is the cinnamon muffin. Not too sweet not too heavy” you smiled at her, feeling your heart beating in your chest. “I’ll take one of those, and 4 bagels, two blueberry and two plain please” she grinned and lightly brushed your hand which was resting on the counter. “Of course, let me just grab those for you.” Much too quickly she had all her items in a paper bag and had paid for everything. She flashed you one last smile and began to walk out the door, waving at you as she left the shop.

You settled back onto your stool, a stupidly wide smile coming across your face. “What’s got you so happy lily?” Heejin mused, coming back with a tray of muffins. “Oh nothing” you lied, a blush coming over your features at the memory of the mystery girl. “A cute costumer? Awwwe that’s so adorable! What was her name?” Heejin could read you like an open book for better or worse. “I don’t know, I didn’t catch it while she was here but I’ve never seen her before” you sighed.

The next day you came in for your normal shift during lunch, handing out countless bagels with cream cheese, egg and cheese wraps, and handmade baguettes. Before you could rush to the kitchen to pick up a tray of sandwiches, chaeyoung snagged your arm. She was dressed in her casual clothes as she had finished her shift. “What chae im in kind of a hurry” you breathed out. “ a girl came into the shop this morning. She asked if you were here. Blonde hair? Tall? Deep voice? Ring any bells?” She asked. You flushed a deep red. “Yeah she came in the other day while I was covering your shift, I don’t know her name though” you stuttered out. “AWWEE lily has a crush how cute! We can switch shifts if you want, I told her I was just covering for you.” Before you could respond heejin was calling from the front of the store. You rushed away and nodded as you left.

You had talked to heejin and she agreed to let you switch shifts to the morning. You texted chaeyoung, who was more than excited that she could sleep in now instead of getting up at 6:30. You went to bed that night nervous for the day ahead. Would you see the girl again? Was she even interested in you? It was midnight before sleepover took your busy mind.

The next day you had picked out a cute striped top and jean overalls, not that they would be especially visible under the dark brown apron you wore for work. Heejin gave you a questionable glance as you walked in, obviously noting the mor put together outfit than normal. You just shrugged and played it off, slipping on your name tag and apron.

The shift went well, nothing out of the ordinary occurred, rush hour was from 7:30 to 9 as always and you hands hurt from slicing bread and carrying trays back and forth. Some costumers were rude, most were kind, noticing the weary look in your eyes behind your polite smile. By the time the last rush costumer left you were beat. Heejin had replaced nearly the entire display of goodies and she too was taking a much needed stretch.

9:37 the doorbell chimed as a familiar blonde walked through. Heejin knowingly glanced at you and made an excuse of needing the restroom. You made brief eye contact with the stranger and flashed a shy smile. She walked confidently up to you, but the way she played with the ring on her finger showed her nerves. You gathered the courage to speak first rather quickly, hoping to avoid an awkward silence. “Did you like the cinnamon muffin?” You asked lightly, hope glinting in your eyes. You didn’t want to have recommended something she disliked, but any apprehension was quelled at her grin. “Yes it was delicious, sweet but not too heavy just like you said. My friends really enjoyed the bagels as well.” She turned looked up from the display, meeting your eyes “I came yesterday too, your friend was here obviously, not you, umm i really liked the pastries so you might see a lot of me I hope that’s ok” she giggled a bit, clearly rambling. “I like your outfit” she gestured to your overalls. “Thank you very much” you blushed “and I’m glad you enjoyed everything, I have no problem seeing someone as beautiful as you every morning” you flirted without even realizing what you had said before it was too late. You slapped a hand over your mouth and felt blood rush to your ears in embarrassment. Thankfully the girl seemed just as flustered as her cheeks had become a pink color.

“What would you like today?” You quickly changed the subject. “Oh! Ummm” she stalled almost as if she had forgotten she was supposed to buy something. “4 bagels, 2 plain and 1 blueberry, 1 sesame. And uhh surprise me, whatever you like I’ll take” she smiled. You handed her the bag of treats, “I decided on the sugar apple scone, it’s one of the best I’ve had in a long time i hope you like it....” you trailed off, not sure what the pretty girls name was. “Oh!” She exclaimed, sensing your question “hyojin. My name is hyojin.” “That’s a very nice name, i hope you enjoy them hyojin.” You fiddled with the knob on the cash register. She glanced back at you before she left, suddenly rushing back, grabbing a napkin and scribbling something on it. She smiled and walked out quickly, handing the bag to an orange haired girl outside, clearly apologizing for the wait. When you looked at the napkin in your hands it had printed on it in messy handwriting. “Text me :) 564-332-1208” you grinned ear to ear, spinning around in joy despite yourself. You entered in her number and saved it as “Hyojin💘💘”

It was that night that you texted her. The two of you were slightly awkward at first, each text was filled with questions to help you get to know each other. Before long she was speaking in slang and abbreviated short sentences. Your conversations ranged from how annoying slow walkers were to your deepest fears. Things you had never thought to tell anyone seemed to spill out with hyojin. She told you about her job producing for various artists, and she inquired in your studies at university. You told her about your hometown in America, your dreams to travel the world and your love of the ocean.

It was a few weeks before you saw her outside your shop. She had come in everyday no matter how much you two texted, everytime trying a new food, sometimes even giving you suggestions on how to improve certain pastries. You had finally had the courage to ask her on a ‘date’ with the help of heejin. You had baked a batch of orange scones (her favorite) and placed them in a small bag which had a card that read ‘will you go on a date with me? Either way enjoy the scones i know they’re your favorite❤️’ hyojin had broken into a large grin, nodding immediately and hugging you over the counter.

Now the day had come. You were wearing a pair of blue jeans which chaeyoung and dahyun insisted made your legs look amazing, as well as a white T-shirt with roses. You had picked up a bouquet of calla lillies and yellow daffodils. Seulgi has gushed about the meaning of each flower as she arranged them, insisting that you didn’t have to pay as she was glad you finally got a girl.

When you met hyojin in the park across from her apartment building you smiled at her, unsure of what to say first. “Here I got these for you” you managed to squeak out. “The lillies mean beauty and elegance, I didn’t just get them because my name is lily don’t worry and um the daffodils mean success and prosperity in love I hope you like them” you blushed deep red and resisted the urge to cover your face. Hyojin took the bouquet gently, smelling the flowers and thanking you. “They’re gorgeous. I’ll have to put them in water when I get home. It’s so thoughtful that you knew the meanings...most people just get roses and call it good” she chuckled.

The air of nervousness quickly dissipated as the two of you walked through the park. At some point hyojin had slipped her hand in yours, rubbing your skin with her thumb. You resisted a giddy giggle in your throat and gently squeezed her palm. You came across a street vendor selling ice cream, and hyojin had insisted on buying you whatever you wanted (it was partly because you had admitted you had been giving her the special handpicked pastry at a significantly lower price everyday). You picked up a vanilla small cone and slipped your hand back into hyojins. She found a bench and sat with you while you licked the dessert. At one point she stole a bite, but not before managing to get it on her nose (you had snapped a picture by some miracle and made a note to set it as your background). She got her revenge on you by smearing some of the sweet on your lip and cheek with a giggle. You pouted and crossed your arms as she took the last bite of ice cream, but it didn’t last as she pulled you into a hug your head resting on her shoulder.

“ I really like you lily” she whispered. “I like you too. Thank god I was switched to the morning shift and met you.” Hyojin pulled away slightly, grasping your hand. “ will you be my girlfriend?” She asked tentatively. “Of course I will hyojin” you replied.

Much too soon you were dropping hyojin back off at her apartment with the flowers. “Thank you for today” you said, your words muffled by her shoulder which you had been pulled into.

A few dates in the park and many more trips to the bakery later, hyojin announced she was taking you on a ‘classy date’. You had teased her that she was high maintenance or that the park wasn’t good enough for her much to her frustration. “If you weren’t so fucking cute I’d be mad” she grumbled into the pillow of your couch the two of you were on. “You’re right who could stay mad at this face” you smiled and made a hand heart. “Not me” Hyojin grinned and cupped your face lightly. She met your eyes, asking for permission. Her question was answered when you moved forward and brought your lips to hers, a hand falling on her lower back.

“You taste like cinnamon” she smiled and rested her forehead on yours.

[tdotsspot]

IT’S A NEW YEAR B*TCHES

I seriously don’t think I’ve EVER been this damn happy to start a new year. Actually, I haven’t. I’ve NEVER been this happy to close a year out. To reflect on everything that happened, and while 2017 wasn’t like, THE most horrible year of my life personally or even really that much but, it was a CRAZY year all around. 

I’m sure I’ll forget a lot but just off the top of my head:

Trumps bitch ass. I’m still here like, maybe that was a dream, right? Everything that’s come with Trump. The lies, the embarrassment of this country, this ridiculous ass tax break that crushes the middle class, and happy makes the extra extra rich, even richer. There’s literally at least 10 breaking news stories everyday with his ass, so just watch CNN and figure out how fucking stupid he’s making America. However, a plus would be that it’s the most informed in politics I’ve ever been in my entire life, and it’s brought me out to vote other than the presidential 

The inexplicable amount of racism, sexism, hatred. Club Pulse.....so sad. The airport shooting, wtf. Some of that footage still freaks me out. Can you even imagine???? Going out for a fun night with your friends. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU GONE PARTYING WITH YOUR FRIENDS without a SINGLE worry other than a hangover. And your lovers, friends, family......dead. Traveling. Jesus. Dame and I travel all the time. I can’t even imagine trying to find my luggage and seeing people falling beside me over some bullshit. It’s heartbreaking. Freakin Vegas, damn I almost forgot about that. WHAT THE FUCK. HOW THE HELL DID THAT EVEN HAPPEN. I’ve personally been to Vegas three four times. I’ve passed that area many times and like....wtf. 

And of course.....there’s the probably 74 life lessons I learned in 2017. Here are some of my favorites!!!!

*Damned if you do, Damned if you don’t. AKA you cannot please everyone, you really can’t. Even the people you WANT to please, you can only partially please. So basically, do what you feel is best.

ALSO I NEED TO FOLLOW UP ON MY ONE DAMN NEW YEAR FOCUS, DISCIPLINE. I started this post on the 30th, its the 4th lmao. 

But i just got off the phone with my friend and just talked to my HUSBAND, since you know, I got married this year and it was super fuckin fly. And said FUCK ALL THIS PRETTY SEAN CARTER SHIT NIGGA HOV.

Listen to me when i say “bam” literally LITERALLY speaks to my soul. ‘just set your price and live your life my nigga!’ for real. RESPECT YOURSELF. I realized how I’m now learning I’ve played myself for pennies before. How I’ve let people take advantage bc I’m not a total bitch. But I’ve also realized being a female in my work work, hell is ANY work world, if you don’t HOLD YOUR OWN people will try you. 

NOT THIS YEAR MY FRIENDS. Idgaf WHO you are to me, I'm not with the shits. If that means I lose some ‘friends’ I’m actually totally ok with that. I’ve also realized shit, I barely like anyone anyways, so let me tighten my circle, or really, tighten how I spend my time. I have people in my life for 100 different reasons, and I never want to actually burn bridges, but at the same time.....if youre not on the same wave as I....well carry on.

I don’t want to hear about your excuses as to why your life sucks, why your sig other sucks, why your job sucks....if your not bothering to REALLY do shit. (as I stop my edits to finish this post) but thats ok.

Oh yeah, back to what I learned.

I learned also that I get WAY too friendly and trusting with people before getting to know them. WAY too damn trusting. And that’s my fault. No one really gives a damn about you, even those who say they do. I mean, they MIGHT but at the end of the day, it’s YOUR life, and when you think about that.......

I learned that weddings are stressful AF and even though the end result was BOMB, i still think I would’ve been ok eloping in vegas and having a wild story to share. Nonetheless, what I really learned during that process, is who actually has your back. Who’s phony, who’s fake. People I was cool AF with FUCKED me over, people I had really low expectations surprised me. 

I learned that a fake christmas tree is actually winning. 

I also learned that I really want to move out of Philly. PHILLY you’re doing WAY too much these last 2-4 years and its really pissing me off now. Also, that this city is RUDE AF for no damn reason and mean and petty.com.

I learned I have to do better at letting go, and part of that is not taking the responsibility of other peoples BULL SHIT. When you know that someone is just on their BS and throw some shit towards you, no matter HOW fucking corny, let it go like frozen. Half the time people can’t deal with their own truths, and they’d rather just make someone else miserable. Know your audience, and big them farewell if need be.

I’ve also learned that people are jealous of me. And it really makes me laugh. People swear my life is easy breezy cover girl because I work from home and for myself. ummmmm so the fk what???? lol I swear people think I sit on my ass all day “oh IM sorry I have work today” “ummm ok? so do i bih” But I’ve really REALLY realized that people just don't get it. It makes me laugh. And just FYI just because I have control over my time, doesn’t mean I have free time. I allocate it as I see fit, because I fucking can. Because I took a crazy leap of faith and said fuck working and being dead inside. And because I believe in myself and luckily the two people I love the most believe in me too.

I learned that OH ha. I learned when traveling to a third world country........research more. I’ll just leave it there. Cuba was still dope but like.....wow. I still don’t look at certain chicken meals without wanting to throw up.

Idk mannn, just set your price and live your life.

Don’t deal with the shits this year.

Tdot, out.  

[marktuanlogy-blog]

RECAP OF GOT7 FANMEET 1/29/2017

RECAP OF GOT7 FANMEET/CONCERT Sorry I'm still a bit hyped and excuse my language OMG HOW DO I EVEN START ON THIS SMH. GOT7 WAS SO FREAKING PERFECT UP ON STAGE ;-; WE CHEERED AND SCREAMED FOR EVERY THING THEY SAID CUS WHY NOT ... RETURN MY SOUL, LIFE, AND VOICE NOW .-. i recorded the entire 2hour thing with one arm smh give me my arm back too got7 First of all, we went to go get our merch (poster, jacket, shirt, and light stick) and got to our seats and all... and then we were just waiting for GOT7. Mark's family came exactly 16 minutes before the fanmeet started and we all went wild for a good 3 minutes. So I just went crazy on my Snapchat story and uh spammed it :O THEN it was 7pm and HARD CARRY started playing and we all were just screaming got7 got7 got7 got7 got7 GOT7 CAME OUT LIKE WTFWTFWT I WAS NOT READY i screamed so much with this girl next to me haha she's a jackson bias <3 IT GOT LIT AF. So they sang Let Me I SWEAR THEIR VOCALS ARE BETTER IN REAL LIFE OMG MY EARS GOT BLESSED MARKS RAPPING WAS SO FREAKING PURIFYING OHHHHHHHHHH YOUNGJAES VOCAL BLESSED MY LIFE LIKE WTF MAN They were sitting in the chairs from left to right: Jackson, Jinyoung, Mark, Jaebum, Youngjae, Bambam, and then Yugyeom. THEN THEY SANG Prove It I SWEAR JAEBUMMIES VOICE IS SO SEXYYY AND CHICCCCC X1000000 I LOVE BAMBAMS RAPS IN THIS SONG IDK WHY I JUST DO OK. AND MARKS OMG THOSE DEEP VOICES ARE JUST SE(ductive)XY AF. (NEW FAVORITE SONG IN TURBULENCE) hey all did self introductions (ALL IN ENGRISH YUS IM SO PROUD) and all seemed pretty shy at first OMG HOW COULD U BE SO CUTEEEEE Bambam (ATTEMPTED TO) get us lit but then it got awkward af. Like he told us to say Got7 everytime he says Ay and the third time he didnt even realize we said GOT7 and he just kept looking at us like SMH BOI SMH. idk their host was annoying af BUT I MEAN HE WAS THE ONE THAT ENCOURAGED THE SEXY DANCE FROM THE MEMBERS SO NO COMPLAINTS THERE. Q&A started .... Jackson's Question: What's your ideal type? Yugyeom: Sexy cutie IGOT7 (I swear I heard someone from the back saying ILL BE SEXY AND CUTIE FOR YOU YUGYEOM) it was super cute when the host was like raise your hand if your a sexy cutie IGOT7 :3 WE ALL RAISED OUR HANDS haha and yugyeom was like "so many heh *nervous laugh*" Bambam: a girl who is cute, but when you get to know her, she's sexy. I'd like a girl with a sexy side. BOI U NEED A GIRL TO DAB WITH U EVERY MORNING. Youngjae: ummm.. ummmm...... OKAY YOU *points to girl* *breaks everyone else's hearts in the crowd* "BECAUSE YOU ARE AN AHGASE" *HYPES UP CROWD MORE SCREAMING* -everyone else starts saying IGOT7/Ahgases- *Bambam trying to calm us down lmao no it didn't work because Youngjae basically just told us he loves us all* Jaebum: I don't really have an ideal type... (he was nervous af) Host: So you like all AHGASES? Jaebum: yeahhhh.... Host: YEAHHHHH... * I THINK I ACCIDENTALLY STOPPED RECORDING HERE OOPS * MARK: (MINDY IS MY IDEAL TYPE) YOU... I love all AHGASES (boi) Jinyoung: I love IGOT7s <3 Jackson: I love everyone, I love you, I love IGOT7 (love me jackson) Next question: Can the members do a sexy dance? Jackson: Yugyeom Yugyeom you first <3 Yugyeom does sexy dance to Prove It (inappropriate content pm me for those details :3) i will never think of that song the same way again. nope nope nope yugyeomie yah. Mark turns around like no i aint seeing this shit again (even though ur hyung man) Jackson looks down at Yugyeom doing his uh-sexy dance- and is very proud of his work. After Yugyeom was done with the sexy dance Jaebum reached out his hand and took it back and made Yugyeom fall again (savageee) but yes, he did help him up afterwards Yugyeoms face was like why am i even living rn Question: What inspires you in writing a song? Jaebum's: Experience and imagination (DEEP) Host: OH AND JAEBUM READS A LOT (JAEBUMBUMBUMBUM) and watches lots of movies... what kind of movies? -Jaebum's face: wtf is he saying...- Jaebum gets translation: La la land (what is that...) -sings a song from that movie SEXY AF VOICE- Question: What do you like the most of the MV music? Youngjae: i like the small parts and the really strong beat and you can bounce around to the music Question: You (meaning Bambam) and Yugyeom.. can you dance to (???some lit af american music which i clearly dont know of since i got into kpop but it was lit i mean yehhhhh...) music Bambam: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASYYYYYYYYYYY *Insert note: YUGYEOM IS SUCH A CUTE BABY OMG I WANNA ADOPT HIM* Question: If you were an American artist who would you be? Yugyeom: *asks crowd* Yugyeom: Kendrick Lamar? someone from crowd: DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP Bambam: oh? what are u guys saying *laughs* Bambam getting ready for a dab like its his routine DABDAB dabs* crowd goes wild* DABDAB IS VERY PROUD OF SELF* MOMMA JINYOUNG SHAKES HEAD* bambam ur ded. BOOM BOOM BOOM (BOOMX3) PLAYS* G7 TURN UP <33333333333 *me singing to the song but rly i probably pronounced everything WRONG BUT NO REGRETS) HIP THRUST DURING BOOM BOOM BOOM PART YUGYEOM AND BAMBAM CALM DOWNNNNNN When bambam sang "turn all the lights on" MARK LOOKED AT HIM AND NODDED AND WINKED WTF YO I CANNOT TELL YOU HOW GOOD THEIR VOICES ARE IT JUST SOUNDS SO GOOD LIKE UGHHHHHHHHHHAAAHHHHHH PARK JINYOUNG IS LIKE A FREAKING PRINCE IN THAT BLACK JACKET WITH SILVER LINING AND RED UNDERSHIRT OMG HE IS A TRUE PRINCE HIS PERM IS JUST HUKUHKHUHKUH then... JUST RIGHT PLAYS CROWD GOES CRAYCRAY AGAIN *MINDY'S NONSTOP SHAKING YO* THIS ENTIRE SONG IS SO WARMING I LOVE THE WORLD NOW lol thats funny. YOUNGJAE SWITCHING UP THOSE VOCALS MADE US DRUNK AF BAMBAM IS BEING EXTRA AF LET ME TELL U WITH THOSE LONG LEGS HE LOOKED LIKE HE WAS READY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD (JACKSON). IN HIS RAPPING PART JACKSON WAS very inappropro lets make this less inappropro and just say he was like "SAY OHHHH YEAHHH.... SAY OHHHHH YEAHHHHHHH... SAY OHHHHHH YEAHHHHHH. SAY OHHHHHH YEAHHHHH." BAMBAM: "SAY OHHHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (voice cracks* smh boi) SAY OHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHH (voice cracks again*) SAY OHHHHHHH YEAHHHHH (now imagine this in a deep deep voice) SAY OHHHHH YEAHHHHH (this was even deeper) ++++++++++++++++++++++++ GAMES ++++++++++++++++++++++++ Game #1: Guess the Song Game #2: Hacky Sack (each member from GOT7 plays with someone from the audience) Everyone chooses who they partner with MINDY WAS 2 NUMBERS AWAY FROM MARKS NUMBER SMH MARK MARK MARK IF YOU ONLY ADDED 2 TO THAT LAST DIGIT I WOULDVE GONE UP .-. you wouldve hugged meh <3 (that's for lataaa) mindy's heart breaks NO BUT I FEEL HAPPY FOR THOSE IGOT7 WHO WENT UP STAGE MAN NONE CRIED??? I WOULDVE FLIPPED HELL (sorry sab's natural habitat) GOT7'S COMPETITIVENESS IS CRAZY EVERY ONE WAS SCREAMING AND DYING AND KILLING EACHOTHER TO GET THE RIGHT ANSWER OMG But overall, Youngjae won the first round after guessing the most amount of songs correct <3 He even went on his knees for "Beggin' on My Knees" *lowkey feels like Jinyoung, Yugyeom, and Mark were pretty ignored... almost never got called on...* Game #2 begins and the people who were chosen gets up stage :D Every IGOT7 does their self introduction Yugyeom's partner: Amy, favorite GOT7 song is Fly Bambam's partner: Molly, 24 years old *PAUSE HERE FOR A SEC* Bambam: ohhh.... NOONA *continue* Bambam's partner: favorite GOT7 song is If You Do Youngjae's partner: Arianna Youngjae: Arianna, ah, yea, WOAWWWW Youngjae: How old are you? Arianna: Who's that Youngjae: I asked how old are you. Who I am? I'm Youngjae HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH Youngjae: What's your favorite song? Arianna: Who's That Youngjae: You don't like Home Run? Jaebum's partner: C(K?)at Jaebum: Cat? Oh wow oh oh uhhhhh okay What's your favorite song? Cat: Just Tonight Mark's partner: (mindy ;-; jk) Serena, favorite song is Fly Jinyoung's partner: Vivian, favorite song is Mayday Jackson: Sussy, from China, favorite GOT7 song is IDK because she doesn't understand engrish. and her favorite member is Jinyoung (BETRAYALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL) Jackson: Can you be more confident? *HUGS* (i need a man like jackson ;-;) JACKSON SAYS HIS PARTNER IS PRO AND WEARS HER COAT SO SHE CAN KICK THE THINGY JACKSON YOOOO GIRL WANNA TRADE (wait but mark) Scores for the second game: Youngjae team: 5 Jaebum team: *Jaebum trying to be calm but almost trips smh* 3 Bambam team: *STARTS MAKING SHIPS OF HIM AND HIS PARTNER* "Holly, Bambam... Hollybam.... Bamlly. Bamlly you go first" 4 Jinyoung team: *JINYOUNG IS SUPER GOOD AT THIS* 15 (Jinyoung made like 12 im so proud of this mother) MARK TEAM: (mark im so proud) gets 16 ---- PRAISES THE KICKY THINGY hugs the girl up in the air .... mindy is reminded that her last digit was only 2 numbers away sad face XD Yugyeom team: *hits his partner and she fake dies lol* 8 Jackson team: "She's pro" *CONFIDENT HES GONNA WIN* *TAKES OFF HER JACKET AND HOLDS IT FOR HER* *AFTER HIS PARTNER IS DONE PUTS JACKET BACK ON HER* 5 WINNER IS TEAM MARKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK the girl gets marks jacket LUCKYYYYYYYYY WE GOT TO SEE THE "SECRET" BEHIND THE SCENES OF THE MAKING OF HARD CARRY'S MV THEY ARE SO SEXY IN THEM. THEY START PERFORMING FLY JB IS BACK TO HIS EXTRA SELF AND THIS TIME ALSO BRINGS IN YUGYEOM SMH. MARKS RAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP HOW CAN MY HEART TAKE THIS LOL NO I DIDNT I DIED. JINYOUNG'S VOICE IS SO SOFT WTF MANNN even mark screaming at the end was sexy af everything got7 does is sexy af SMIRK FACE INSERTED NEXT THEY PERFORMED IF YOU DO THEIR PERFORMANCES ARE SO GOOD I FEEL LIKE IM REPEATING SO MUCH BUT ITS RLY RLY AMAZING IM SO PROUD OF THEM GAWD GOT7 IS SO AMOOZHING GOT7 say their thank yous and YUGYEOM WIPES HIS SWEAT uughgghhghghg and its sexy af THEY SAID THEY WILL COME BACK JINYOUNG SAID THEY WILL COME BACK THIS YEAR. JINYOUNG SAYS KCON JINYOUNG SAYS SO. *MINDY STARTS SAVING NEW YEARS MONEY THEY START PERFORMING HARD CARRY HARD CARRY HEH WOH HARD CARRY HEH *no jackson did not lift up his shirt like i expected* Jaebum wraps HIMSELF IN A HOODIE AND IT LOOKS SO DARK BUT SO CUTEEEEEE THEN THEY PERFORMED HOME RUN ONE OF MY FAVS <3 JINYOUNG AND HIS SASS OMG JINYOUNGGGGGGGGG BAMBAM TAKES SOMEONES PHONE AND RECORDS HIMSELF BAMBAM KNOWS HOW TO KILL FANS. BEWARE OF THE BAMBAM.. SO DOES JINYOUNG. BEWARE OF BOTH JINYOUNG AND BAMBAM. THEY SAID THEIR GOODBYES AND LEFT </3 -------------------------------------- overall this fanmeeting was a very very very amazing experience and I got to see GOT7 in real life, not through the screen bUT IN REAL LIFE ive been crying since 11 smh i need help it's so surreal I can't even believe it's already over like. HUKKKK. Got7 is probably at Mark's house right now and Mark finally gets to reunite with his parents that he hasn't seen since summer. got7 is probably resting up for their next comeback

[yas-surveys]

162. // THEN, THEN, NOW

Then: December 18, 2014 Then: December 18, 2015 Now: January 13, 2020 (Damn it would be cool if i answered this last december anyways)

1. Where was the last place you went to hang out? Do you hang out there often? If not, where do you usually go? THEN: i can’t actually remember HAHA. maybe 7-eleven or something, yeah. THEN: at the mall i guess, well not really often, but for the christmas time i guess, since i go shopping with enzo NOW:i have literally no idea, the last time i was out was to go to school, and i dont think that counts as a hangout, DAMN IM BORING

2. When did you last speak to your best friend of the opposite sex? What did you talk about? THEN: - Friday, his love life. HAHAHA. THEN: - yesterday; all kinds of stuff, lol, HAHAHA, but we last discusses about the gift his friends gave him and he was too lazy to read the instructions so i read it for him lol NOW: yesterday! we were talking about going to the beach

3. Would you rather be called ‘beautiful’ or ‘sexy’? Why? THEN: - beautiful bc when you say beautiful, it’s kinda all in all, your personality and stuff THEN: ^^ NOW: WHY PICK ONE, WHY NOT BOTH? 

4. Do you think someone is attracted to you? THEN: probably??? THEN: i honestly have no idea NOW: yeah

5. When was the last time you used public transport? THEN: last Friday THEN: yesterday NOW: the last time i went out? january 8

6. Are there any flirty messages in your inbox? THEN: - noooope THEN: nope NOW:

7. What age do you think is the right age to lose your virginity? Do you think people are losing it too soon these days? If so, why do you think people feel the need to lose it at a very young age? THEN: - idrk, maybe when you know your emotionally ready and you have a job bc you need to support your child yourself. yeah, bc sometimes teenagers don’t think about what’s going to happen to them if they got pregnant, what they have in mind is the happiness while doing it or something, idk, maybe bc being not a virgin is a huge part of your life and stuff and they like to brag to others and stuff THEN: ^^ NOW: hOLY SHIT IM ACTUALLY CRYING AT MY ANSWERS HAHAAHAHAAHA ANYWAYS, LOSING YOUR VIRGINITY DOESNT MEAN GETTING PREGNANT MARGARET, THERE’S CONTRACEPTIVES. OH MY GOD. But sorry for my past self, I won’t say that there’s a right age to lose your virginity? Some who lost them in such an early young age are probably thriving right now? It doesn’t matter? As long as it consensual and you’re in the right mindset of what you’re doing then I don’t see why it’s supposed to matter? Like they say virginity is a social construct, which you just fucking call when you first had sex. I do think people are losing it too soon but I don’t think that’s such a bad thing? It’s a fucking normal thing that humans long. What we should talk about the issue of unwanted pregnancies and sex education. But not the point that wherein really young people are doing it? I really can’t say, I don’t have much statistics. But I do feel like that CERTAIN people need to lose it since being a virgin is now such a big word. Which is what we need to demolish. If we just unhinge that word from it’s meaning then I don’t think everyone would make such a big fuss about it? You’re just another person to have sex for the first time? Congratulations, now everybody, move along?

8. Do you make an effort to be nice to people you dislike? Would you hang around with someone you disliked, if your other friends liked them? THEN: - yeah. well, me and my friends, dislike the same people so we’re fine THEN: ^^ NOW: yea, i actually do since i believe that even though you hate somebody else, it’s no excuse to be not nice to them? so i don’t get this plastic thing tbh

9. What’s the closest thing to you that’s green? THEN: - the couch i’m sitting on right now THEN: like a placemat i’m sitting on lol NOW: pillow

10. How exactly are you feeling at this moment? Why do you feel this way? THEN: - It’s so fucking cold, idk maaaaan. i’’m just rly feeling cold. HAHAHAHAHA. there’s this typhoon in our country and it’s just so cold THEN: OH GOD, i feel really sick and hot rn and i’ve been coughing all day :—( NOW: tired, my heart’s kind of hurting from the ashfall probably?

11 So, tell me a bit about your best friend of the opposite sex. Are you strictly just friends, or is there something more between you? THEN: - ooh, enzo, just in the past question we’re talkiing about his love life bc he broke up with this girl but i think they’re coming together again since they always talk and stuff. so we’re strictly just friends, and i don’t really like to be with him since i think it’s going to destroy our 3 years friendship THEN: still enzo, i mean this girl i’m talking about, enzo ended finally this may of this year, after lots of on and offs, and he’s not been with anyone since and it’s been the same for us, just friends, we cOOL bFFS 4 lyf NOW: OH MY GOD. THE GIRL WAS ESTER FUCK ME HAHAAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHA HOLY SHIT, but it’s cool that enzo’s still my best friend

12. When was the last time you felt severe physical pain? What was the reason for your pain? THEN: - ooooh, i hit my knee on the edge of my bed. GOOD. it hurts a fuckin lot THEN: i can’t exactly remember, like severe sooOOoo idk rly NOW: idk tbh HAHAHAHAHAHA 

13 . In your opinion, what makes someone attractive? Be as general or as specific as you like. THEN: - appearance bc you know that’s the first thing people see and the personality THEN: well i guess now, it’s kind of both, i mean, sometimes, you look at what he’s doing and and his personality and just look at the appearance next and you can actually consider it sOooOOo NOW: ummm his mIND OH MY GOD. tbh now that i’m thinking of it very deeply, that’s where his intentions come from, what he thinks of you, what he wants to do for you, how much he loves, IT ALL COMES FROM THERE. SO DAMN. IF YOU’RE BOY A GENIUS. KEEP HIM. BUT LIKE EMOTIONAL AND INTELLECTUAL GENIUS.

14. When things in life start going wrong, are you the kind of person who tends to fall apart, or do you try to stay strong and hold it together? THEN: i’m kind of mixture of both. HAHAHA. THEN: ^^ still both lol, depends on the situation NOW: FALL APART LMAO.

15. Someone tells you that you’re beautiful/good-looking. Do you agree with them? THEN: - depends on who the person is THEN: ^^ NOW: i’d say thank you

16. If I came round to your house to have dinner, what would you make for me? THEN: - oh god i don’t cook soooo. THEN: ^^ NOW: but who are you? 

17. How did you meet the last person you added as a friend on Facebook? THEN: - i haven’t add anyone on fb so idk THEN: i haven’t added someone for a long long time, prolly a teacher in my school for school purposes too NOW: i have no idea who i last added on facebook. damn. so that’s still me after 5 years wow.

18. What is your relationship with your mother like? Is it a close relationship, or do you distance yourselves from each other? Why do you think your relationship is the way it is? THEN: - my relationship with my mom is great, i can talk to her about anything and stuff THEN: ^^ NOW: yea i guess, we are pretty close but not to the point where i tell her EVERYTHING, that’s just creepy

19. Can you remember the very first conversation you had with the last person you texted? THEN: - it was kirsten and i met her at 2nd grade bc it was the first day of 2nd grade and i was new andit was a big school, i didn’t know anyone so i cried and she went up to me and asked me why was i crying HAHA THEN: it was danice, and i honestly can’t remember tbh HAHAHAHAHA, we met in 4th grade NOW: it was my mom and ofc i can’t remember our first conversation

20. Do you keep up to date with the charts? Are there any songs that are kind of old now, that you still like to listen to? THEN: - nah, bc, i kinda listen to everything that makes my ears happy. HAHA. yeah. THEN: ^^ NOW: oh, hell no. i don’t even know what are the bops these days. i’m a grandma when it comes to music.

21. Who or what has been on your mind the most today? THEN: - christmas. christmas. christmas. THEN: yes yes yes ^^^ NOW: aw,,, i really do like christmas,,, hehehe, um nothing tbh

22. At what age do you think you’ll be ready to think about having children? THEN: - maybe like 24-26? THEN: as long as i’m financially stable then i’m good NOW: never. having kids.

23. Put your iPod or any music player on shuffle and give me the first two lines from the first 10 songs selected. THEN: - ‘Some nights I stay up cashing in my bad luck; Some nights I call it a draw’ - ‘Cecilia, you’re breaking my heart; You’re shaking my confidence daily’ - 'First thing’s first, I’m the realest; Drop this and let the whole world feel it’ - 'Give me more lovin’ than I’ve ever had; Make it all better when I’m feelin’ sad’ - 'Baby, when they look up at the sky; We’ll be shooting stars just passing by’ - 'It’s just another night; And I’m staring at the moon’ - 'It’s probably what’s best for you; I only want the best for you’ - 'Saturday morning jumped out of bed and put on my best suit; Got in my car and raced like a jet, all the way to you’ - 'When your legs don’t work like they used to before; And I can’t sweep you off of your feet’ - 'so let’s sing na, na na na na, hey ya; cmon and sing na, na na na na, hey ya’ THEN: - ‘I am not that kind of girl, who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion’ - ‘And i hate to say i love you, when it’s hard for me’ - ‘Your love is bright as ever, even in the shadows’ -  I was born in the arms of imaginary friends, Free to roam, made a home out of everywhere I’ve been’ - ‘ My heart is sinking, As I’m lifting up’ - ‘ Wise men say, only fools rush in’ - ‘ Come on skinny love just last the year, Pour a little salt we were never here’ - ‘ He said, “Let’s get out of this town, Drive out of the city’ - ‘ Hush, don’t speak, When you spit your venom, keep it shut I hate it’ - ‘ I can taste salt water , And if I blink again’ NOW: OH MY GOD IM LAUGHING AT THOSE ANSWERS OKAY HERE’S MINE -  She's got a family in Carolina, So far away, but she says I remind her of home - You’re white dress, sparks words spontaneous -  Ain't never felt this way, Can't get enough so stay with me - After the war, I went back to New York, A-After the war, I went back to New York -  Darling, darling, doesn't have a problem, Lying to herself 'cause her liquor's top shelf - I wanna pick you up and scoop you out - I've got a secret for the mad, In a little bit of time it won't hurt so bad - Mr. Vice President, Mr. Madison, Senator Burr - You keep saying that you’re alright, but I can see you through your fake smile you’re not - 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9, There are 10 things you need to know

24. The last time you went for a night out, who did you go with? THEN: - i don’t rly go on night outs but maybe the last one will be last october 28 wt my friends THEN: i still don’t go on night outs, well i mean, the latest i came home this month was 10:30 and i was out christmas shopping with enzo so NOW: my college blockmates i think?

25. Do you know anyone who doesn’t use Facebook, or dislikes it? Do you like or dislike it? THEN: - yeah, one of my best friends, laya, she hates it HAHA but we need to use it for school stuff. and laya actually keeps an eye on things, she wants not to be noticed on fb and stuff HAHA. i don’t really dislike it but i don’t love it either THEN: well laya has not been ranting about fb and she’s been using it a lot for chat purposes so, as of now, i don’t know anyone NOW: i don’t think so, neither

26. Have you ever mistaken a complete stranger for someone you knew? THEN: - yeah, but i think, i haven’t came to them (*i came to them, 2020) and said hi HAHA THEN: yeah NOW: yea

27. What did you have for breakfast this morning? THEN: - just bread and peanut & butter, and i’m rly hungry rn THEN: well i got out of bed like 3:36 or something, and there was no food so i ate this good large bread HAHAHAHAH and just some nerds and chocolate and that’s all the food i’ve eaten today and it’s 8:40 already and i haven’t had a proper meal yet, i’m really hungry NOW: tocino

28. Have you ever made a promise to someone that you didn’t keep? THEN: -  yeah, i think we all have THEN: yeah NOW: yeah

29. Are you ever afraid to show how you feel? THEN: - yeah, i’m always afraid THEN: ^^ yep, i am still NOW: depends on who i am with

30. Have you ever been blamed or got into trouble for something that wasn’t your fault? THEN: - yeah THEN: yeah NOW: yeah

31. Have you ever wondered what death might be like, and what might happen afterwards? It’s depressing to think about I know, but do you have an opinion about it? THEN: - yeah, oh my gods, it’s just so confusing; what would the people feel if i died and stuff, and what would happen to me, would i still see my friends and stuff THEN: i’ve been reading a lot of books associated with death, i guess, and it’s making me think more, and i guess, it’s just sleeping forever and it’s quite creepy NOW: yea of course, i don’t really have an opinion about it? but i do wonder what happens next? do you really lose unconsciousness and just drift away? 

32. Tell me something you like about your life, and something you dislike about it. THEN: - oh god, it’s gotten pretttty chaotic, i’m miserable and depressed and confused than before THEN: my life rn has beeeen a complete mess, GOD, i don’t like it. i really feel down and i mean being on christmas break is actually heping me a lot sine there NOW: i honestly can’t think of one things that’s going in the right direction at the moment, yesterday I was fucking crying my eyes out and promised myself to get checked as soon as I can.

33. Choose 10 people at random. THEN: 1. Ysabel 2. David 3. Enzo 4. Ester 5. Laya 6. Earl 7. Pamela 8. Nica 9. Kirsten 10. Kris THEN: 1. Kirsten 2. Enzo 3. Laya 4. Danice 5. David 6. Hannah 7. Pamela 8. Ricafort 9. Ysabel 10. Vito NOW: 1. Kirsten 2. Raphael 3. Enzo 4. Kate 5. Derick 6. Aly 7. Cely 8. Miki 9. Joui 10. Vanessa

34. Do you think 1 would ever help you out if you were in trouble? - i hope so NOW: yea

35. Would you swap places with 2 for a week? - sure, HAHAHA NOW: HELL NO. 

36. What would you say if 3 asked you out? - yea sure HAHA NOW: sure

37. Who is taller, you or 4? - i have no idea, i think she is NOW: she is

38. Do you think 5 has ever lied to you? -  yeah, probably NOW: i dont think so?

39. Do you think 6 will ever get married? - yeah, why not NOW: yea

40. If you had to cook a meal for 7, what would you make? - i did the numbers random, and it ended up on pamela again HAHAHAHAA but still, bacon HAHA, the only thing i can make that she likes NOW: PANCIT CANTON HAHAAHAHHA

41. Do you think 8 will ever get married? - yeah. NOW: yea

42. If 9 turned up at your door now, what would you do/say? Would you let him/her in? - YA YA YA NOW: yea

43. When is 10’s birthday? - o god, i’m not rly sure lol, prolly april???? i’M SO SORRY VITO NOW: september 18

44. Have you ever felt jealous of 1? - yeah, i guess, but not that much NOW: yea i guess at some aspects like being rich lmao.

45. If 2 decided never to speak to you again, would you care? - OH GOD YES NOW: OF COURSE I WOULD OH MY GOD

46. What colour is 3’s hair? - black and brown NOW: black

47. Do you know what colour 4’s eyes are? - black NOW: black

48. When was the last time you talked to 5? What did you talk to him/her about? - yesterday, not much NOW: january 7 in chat, january 11.

49. Who has kissed the most people, you or 6? - we haven’t kissed anyone yet HAHAHA NOW: OMG I ACTUALLY HAVE NO IDEA!!! i feel like me? but still no idea

50. What is the age difference between you and 7? Who is older? - she’s older. but i’m still taller HAHAHAHA NOW: she is

51. Describe 8 - what does he/she look like? - oh, he’s dark brown, laya and i LOVEEEE his legs, it’s smooth, he has a pretty strong feminine side and he has a subtle curly hair, his teeth are quite crooked and HE’s REALLY FUNNY NOW: REALLY SMALL GIRL WITH A SMALL FACE and long hair and such a petite frame

52. Is 9’s house within walking distance? - no, it’s near our school and our school is 30 minutes away without traffic from our house NOW: NO WAY

53. What if you found out that 10 had sex with the person you love/like? - OH MY GOD well, starting they’re not gay and stuff but if it happened, i would just be shocked NOW: HOLY SHIT THAT IS PRETTY AND VERY UNLIKELY BUT HOLY SHIT. THAT’S VERY WEIRD SCENARIO TO PICTURE

54. Do you like your teeth? THEN: - i don’t love them but i don’t hate them either THEN: i hate it NOW: hate it

55. Have you ever been to the cinema to watch a film, and ended up walking out because you hated it? THEN: - nope THEN: i have never done it, it’s just like wasting money and why watch a film when you know you wouldn’t like it NOW: UGH NEVER, if you don’t like it then just sleep? it’s cozy in there

56. The last person you held hands with, is that person single? THEN: - it was carl, but we’re just friends, and it was a joke, and yes he’s single THEN: i can’t even remember NOW: no he’s not

57. How about the last person you messaged on Facebook, are they single? THEN: - yep THEN: yes NOW: nope

58. How old is the 11th person in your phone’s contacts list? THEN: - i have no idea THEN: - still have no idea NOW: i don’t know tbh, her late 20′s?

59. Does it bother you when people ask questions about your love life? THEN: - nah THEN: not rly since i have non HAHAHAHA NOW: not really

60. Does the last person you kissed have freckles? THEN: - nope THEN: i haven’t kissed anyone yet so NOW: nope

61. Is it easy for people to tell when you’re upset, or are you good at hiding it? THEN:  i have resting bitch face so people always think i’m mad or something THEN: ^^ NOW: I DONT HAVE A FUCKING RBF WHO WAS I KIDDING!!! OH MY GOD. i’m not good at hiding when im upset.

62. Have you ever thought about joining a dating site? THEN: - oh gods, idek. i really have no idea HAHAHA. but yeah lol THEN: sure why not lol, but i always thought about it being very awkward NOW: already did

63. On a scale of 1 to 10, how you would you rate your own appearance (going on how you look right now)? THEN: probably 6 lol. i look oily and my hair looks awful right now THEN: prolly a 7, because i feel like ‘I LOOK REALLY OKAY AND THIS IS NOT WHAT I LOOK LIKE WHEN THERE’S PEOPLE AROUND NOW: OH HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD A SOLID ZERO. 

64. On a scale of 1 to 10, how happy are you right now? THEN:  a 5, i just found out that my crush wants to bring evrything back gdi (Oh my GOD, HE DID NOT WANT EVERYTHING BACK, 2020) THEN: a 6, i guess NOW: 7????

65. On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate this survey? THEN: - like a 7? THEN: ^^ NOW: ^^ 

[survivorkomnata]

Episode #9: "Anyone wanna speak up?" - Zach

they tRIED IT SDLGKDMSKLGM

ok so miguel was voted off 5-4-1 miguel/ME??/luke. the four people who voted me were stephen / ally / jess / luke. thankfully, i could count on the Kato 2.0 people on having my back. we also just made an alliance!!! because FUCK my og alliance with stephen/ally/(and karthik). and I STILL HAVE AN IDOL.

ok i'm just shook. i lowkey thought maybe alyssa was playing me but.. she wasnt. she saved me and i owe her for that. i hope it doesnt really hurt her position in the game but she's by far playing the best i think.

i'm just shook. i'm not mad at anyone. i apologize for how i acted post-tribal but oMGGGfgGgG these BITCHES|!!! it's the game tho, and i hope i can keep on kicking and swinging cuz im gonna fight tooth and nail in this game.

also it's so funny idk why but me saying the last line was ALGKDLSGK i still laugh:

anyone wanna speak up?

(ill give more later im just.. frazzled)

Ummm so about that fucking vote. WTF IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?! WE HAD THE CHANCE OF TAKING OUT A FORMER WINNER AND A PROVEN CHALLENGE BEAST! I'm convinced the IQ of this person who flipped is a -20 because.. that was the stupidest move in the existence of Tumblr Survivor..... and I'm the QUEEN of the House of Stupid Moves. I can declare it.

I'm not 1000% sure right now who it is but I have two guesses.

My first guess is: It was Ally.

Reasons: 1. Ally has admittedly worked with Zach in another Survivor game. 2. She also arguably had the MOST contact out of everyone with Zach all day. 3. She possibly wants to pin this vote on Alyssa to break up any possible alliance between myself/Stephen/ Alyssa. 4. She wants to break up me and Alyssa 5. The group of Karth/Zach/Ally is a thing?

My second guess is: Alyssa Reasons: 1. If Zach left she is the next biggest threat here. 2. She wanted a shield. 3. She's trying to build as many relationships with people as possible to cover her social fucking ass. 4. She hates me and wants to off me and will use Zach to kill me in this game.

I honestly don't even know if my predictions are correct here but... I sort of hope they are and I don't look dumb in the future.

My plan going forward is: to not create a bigger mess that was already created.

XOXOXO Jessip Girl.

I'd also like to add another reason why I think it's Alyssa is because Miguel was one of the people who tried to vote her off.

THANK U

Wow!! An attempted blindside gone wrong. This was really exciting and fun. These are the reasons I play this game for, finally happy to see these happening. A lot of lies and betrayal all of which is understandable but these things has got me pumped up. I am going to play with my emotions and they have triggered me. Time to start playing the game and play it hard. An attack on Zach is an attack on me, so they better be prepared to handle my rage.I feel this was a very good tribal in terms of the game as it makes its future bright and exciting. Luke....what are you doing??? Everything that has come to out of his mouth so far has been a lie. I just cant believe the way he is playing, no where close to what I was expecting from him.

After last night's chaos... my word. I have a feeling Touchy Subjects is going to destroy some people here.

Plot twist: I've heard some recent developments about the flipped vote.

According to Tim it was Luke? Oh? Buddy.... has officially been put on my "Shit List" in this game. You can't sit around and play both "sides" of this game. THAT'S MY JOB.

I'm not too sure how I'm going to break this to Ally. She might not believe me but I KNOW I NEED TO TELL HER.

Also: I still don't get why sooo many people trust Tim. I know Tim doesn't trust me anymore or maybe... not as much as he used to. BUT why did he tell Zach right away about the Miguel vote yesterday? IT ALL SEEMS SO SKETCHY.

Being thrown in the basement has given me an opportunity to reflect on some things in the game. I was kinda flattered to be the winner of both "running the game" categories in Touchy Subjects. Unfortunately, that perception might cause the other players to plan more behind my back. I know from last vote that being in the basement before Tribal Council shouldn't impact things tooooo much for me. Still, I'd rather have the opportunity to talk with people whenever I want.

Speaking of last vote, I tried to blindside Zach! And it didn't happen. The original plan was Miguel, but things got switched up when no one seemed to bite into wanting him out. Ally wanted to get Tim instead, which signaled to me that she obviously didn't have a strong relationship with him. So I had to swoop in and say Zach should go instead because Tim is in one of my many alliances. Honestly I'm beginning to prefer the 4 Elements alliance over AJ's Angels because it's possible Alyssa was the one who flipped, and she's not telling me it was her. But after Touchy Subjects, I think I have a better chance against Karth in the end than I previously thought. He's viewed as inactive, which I personally disagree with, but that perception is very good for me.

Another alliance I'm in is the "Samurais" which I would have liked to call "The Resistance" but Luke had other plans. I honestly just view this alliance as a means to an end. That end being.... getting Zach out, SOON! Hopefully Ally has a case of tunnel-vision with getting Zach out as soon as possible and her/Luke don't suspect a thing when I flip right afterwards.

All of this is contingent on Jess feeling the same way, since flipping on my own wouldn't get me the numbers, which I think she will now that she sees the other players view Karth as being dragged to the end.

I'm still in the basement, so I don't know who the 2 sides are voting for. I doubt Zach sent me down here because he wants me to find an advantage... so I could be a target. I hope Karth and Tim would keep that from happening, and push the vote onto Luke instead. I might prefer to get Jake out just because I don't have a strategic relationship with him, but beggars can't be choosers. It's not like I'm particularly close with Luke anyway.

Ok so sorry for not making confessionals as often as I did before!!  The game has literally been warped based off of the fist merge vote. Zach was targeted by Stephen, Ally, Luke, and JESS. Freaking Jess flipped on me when I thought we were really tight and cool. I played off my frustration with the others in the alliance of the 4 elements as understanding but I made moves. I first formed that allaince but now I formed an allaince of Kato 2.0 minus Miguel ofc. Tonights vote I want to do Luke but lets see. I will talk about challenge results soon as well!!

i won IMMUNITY!!! i'm so blessed because i've been told by two sources (namely tim & alyssa) that i was going to be targeted had i not. so? bless!

regarding what ''subjects'' i won: - would dump rice in the fire [true] - biggest physical player [true] - most likely to have an idol [true] - trust the most [false??] - want to see win at the end [false lol]

so that's interesting. i did a tentative game ranking and originally i put: alyssa > zach > ally > karthik > stephen > jake > jess > tim > luke

but now i'd put: alyssa > ally > karthik > zach=stephen > jake > jess > tim > luke but it's still super tricky to accurately rate because of the multiple factors you could include (threat size, potential to win, potential to go to FTC, allies, etc.). i honestly think my jury management is 0/2 so far, and that i will lose at FTC due to ''not working with people'' even tho i entirely blame others for that :D

now let's talk about the reasonings for voting me (hopefully i haven't spoken about this already): stephen - were worried about a potential idol play/new vote so they voted the "safer option", named zach. --> this kinda throws me off. i think it's realistically the most truthful of the 4 excuses, but it's kinda sad that my name was a ''safe'' vote opposed to someone having my back (because i have tried to work with them and especially like. jess.) ally - felt betrayed by the stephen w. vote and like i ignored her. --> i think this is dumb. firstly, girl, we kno u are STRATEGIC. secondly, i didn't ignore her whatsoever?? i was the closest to flipping imo but i didn't because stephen w. targeted ME? like if she genuinely voted me bc i didnt flip after my name was stephens main target (bar jake) then... sister idk what u want. luke - last minute scramble, didn't think i was getting many votes. --> well this is just false. point, blank and period. jess - that when she offered miguel's name, i was hesitant and freaking out (and that she wanted to be my number one opposed to number two). --> dumb. i told her miguel's name. i said it'd be sad but i'd be down and not willing to stick my neck out for miguel. maybe i came off poorly, sure, but if you truly wanted 2 be my ''number one'' u shouldnt make the vote me but rather someone else.

i'm just peeved.

on top of that, karthik is sooo rude??? like he didn't tell me shit about the basement until i confronted him. LIKE. I SENT AN ENEMY (OF MINE) TO THE BASEMENT AND YOU FAILED TO LET ME KNOW THAT YOU GUESS EVERY 6 HRS OPPOSED TO 24?? LIKE ?? I COULDVE SENT IN A DUCKING FRIEND!! so rude. i honestly am questioning my trust with him more and more through each round.

i also want to talk about someone that's great. JAKE! i love you so much. last confessional i may have doubted you (and, maybe the round before) but i'm extremely appreciative for you in this game and i can't stress enough that i'm just paranoid as duck and worry way more than i should. thank u LOL i trust u a lot now.

but, that's all in the past. let's talk about tonights vote. allegedly, stephen told tim that the target was going to be me, but due to immunity, jake is now the target. this makes a little sense given allys been wanting jake out the absolute MOST, but i feel like it'd be a decoy. don't matter tho xx i'm safe. alyssa is also apparently flipping (or, staying i guess) with our side and voting out luke - who is our sides target. i see logic in voting luke. he'll be the easiest of that side to get out, but on the other hand, he's the least threatening and if i'm going to flip someone, it'll be easier to flip people against ally (best liar, etc.) or stephen (running the game, etc.) opposed to luke (voted out next, don't want 2 see win, etc.). but have it be known that i'd CRAVE idolling out stephen or ally, and i may just do that.

it's still early in the day, and a lot can happen. i'll try* to keep yawls posted. i genuinely trust no one and i'm like at the stage of being sad ): because i don't think i can win and i don't think anyone wants to work with me even though i feel like i've been super social. i am always opened when i play games, and that may be 'snakey' or something but i'm willing to work with ANYONE. but they are not seeing that, and i don't know what to do abt it. maybe they're targeting me for being a threat (as a main reason), and that'd make me content but it feels like i'm one of those "one sided" people and... yeah. i guess only time will tell, but my fatass is in final 8 with an idol and all these birches know that, and i'll just have 2 play around that. good luck to me LOL ALSGKDLSKG

After a shocking touchy feelings, I’m feeling nervous about this tribal. No one is saying anything and I’m honestly feeling like I’m going home tonight. People are telling me I shouldn’t be and I want to believe them but I just don’t know.

ugh I want to save Luke but I cant afford to lose Tim/Jake/Zach's trust so I may have to just follow the groups preferences and vote Luke. I would rather have preferred the target to be Jess/Alyssa as they seem to be playing good games and aren't close to me. I had talked it out with Luke and now I feel like he would be help to my game down the line but dont feel like going over the board to save him.

Luke is voted out 5-4. He becomes the third member of our jury.