#Also my favourite idea is DBK pulling a Kool-Aid Man and interrupting a monkey pile nap

[my-insanity-is-an-artform]

More Silly Times au wherein Wukong tells MK all about Macaque, assumptions are made, and nobody is beating the allegations, your honour. Bullet Point edition.

It's important to me that you all know that Shadowpeach were not dating. At all. Much to the dismay, begging, and outright bribery of basically everyone who knew them.

Were they in love? Yes. Did either of them know that? Absolutely not. A neutron star would've been less dense than either of them. Many tried to get them to admit their feelings for each other. All failed.

The betting pool odds, though, are legendary.

Mk tries to ask DBK about Macaque and Wukong and inadvertently opens a whole container of worms.

Mk goes to ask DBK about Wukong's time with the Brotherhood in the aftermath of Season 3 since Wukong also told him about that, hoping that he might be able to give some advice or even help about "getting Monkey King back together with Macaque. Or at least talking properly to each other! It's really obvious that they miss each other and-"

Cue DBK tucking MK under his arm and busting into Waterfall Cave on Flower Fruit Mountain, Kool-Aid Man style.

"XIANDI! WHEN DID YOU AND YOUR WARRIOR GET MARRIED!? AND WHY WAS I NOT INVITED?! DO YOU NOT KNOW HOW MANY YEARS I SPENT DEFENDING YOUR HONOUR?! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH OUR FORMER BROTHERS NOW OWE ME?! WHO COURTNAPPED WHO?!"

It takes twenty minutes for the yelling to stop before Wukong can explain, no he and Macaque have never courted, let alone married! MK, stop calling him my ex!... Guys, stop looking at me like that.

DBK and MK now share am inexplicable and unbreakable bond built entirely on exasperation.

Wukong once told MK a very similar story to The Hero and The Warrior, called The King and The Hero which is how he started opening up to MK about Macaque. Mk is having war flashbacks during the Shadowplay incident.

Either Mk calls Macaque out for telling the story wrong and Macaque gets told that version. Which makes him feel all wibbly which also just makes him mad.

Or MK tells Wukong and he impulsively hunts Macaque down causing a two hour long argument complete with powerpoint slides, multiple shadow puppets, poking and a very passionate monologue over who's version is right.

Or more specifically, who was the hero.

MK and Mei are there as well. MK is this close to locking them both in a closet. Mei is livestreaming and making bank.

It ends in a stalemate.

And the internet goes fucking feral over their new OTP.

MK and Mei spend a good couple of minutes asking Azure for advice on how to get Macaque and Wukong 'back together'.

However you want to imagine Azure's Brotherhood era's feelings for Wukong, whether one-sided romantic or pure admiration or intensely brotherly, Azure still has an ABSOLUTE crisis while processing what MK and Mei asked him.

He also tells Yellowtusk and Peng while capturing DBK. DBK just fans the flames however he can to try to buy time for PIF and Red Son to potentially escape. (He also demands all the money and favours they owe him now.) (I think the chaos this causes does allow at least Red Son to escape so he's now in on the Season 4 adventures.)

Yellowtusk is all like "Oh finally. Good for them." while Peng reacts like the salty bitter ass they are.

They bring it up during the fight against Macaque and Mei and Macaque just flatly stares at Mei.

Way back in the day, Wukong and Macaque pretended to be a married couple for Shenanigan purposes. Present day people find out.

In the OG JTTW, Wukong spends a lot of time glamoured as other people and at least a few times as a woman and in LMK, Macaque is almost canonically a theatre nerd and a drama queen. So I feel this is absolutely in character for both of them.

So they pull this stunt to steal some stuff from a noble family or some demons and at some point they got like a miniature portrait of their glamoured forms done for giggles.

The gang finds the picture centuries down the track because it is in a position of pride in Wukong's hut, spelled within an inch of it's life for protection against general wear and tear, any sort of damage and dust.

Wukong doesn't understand why they are all looking at him like that. He just misses those days some times!

For everyone's sanity, Wukong had his 'Oh. Oh No.' moment right in the aftermath of Season 5 while they're watching the fireworks. Macaque has his when Wukong holds out his hand.

I like to think Wukong looks back at Macaque and sees him all lit up prettily in the fireworks and quietly looses his mind as he realises just how long he's always thought Macaque looked handsome, and just how Macaque has always been there and now he's back and sure things aren't the same as they were, but they can make it better than it was. Mk has already shown him that anything is possible by just believing in himself so maybe they can be friends again and maybe, just maybe!

(MK sees this playout across Wukong's face and is subtly and frantically texting the Group Chat.)

Macaque has his during the hand holding scene (you absolutely know the one) and just sees Wukong, for once, looking back and choosing to face the end with him. Wukong isn't racing off to fight it, or avoid it or anything else. He's choosing to stay and that's all Macaque ever wanted and he nearly lost him to something beyond death and reincarnation. He Heard everything that went down between MK and Wukong and while it makes him guilty that MK had to sacrifice himself, he's just so grateful that he still has a chance to rebuild his bond with Wukong and he can't blow it not when- oh.

And honestly, it just makes them both even more pathetically down-bad for each other. There just more blushing involved now.

The day Shadowpeach is cannon, the internet breaks, MK weeps tears of joy and DBK breaks into Yellowtusk's hold cell to share a drink for old time's sake and to demand his money.