2011 - semifinal 2
originally posted 6/14/20
Bosnia & Herzegovina
LOVE IN REWIND SPARKS SO MUCH JOY YALL. I don't know how they do it, the song is just... it's sentimental and it's happy, and you can really feel it, but it's also easy to enjoy just for fun! I think the staging is part of that as well. Listen I don't know why this song is so beloved but it is... probably my favorite Bosnian entry.
Austria
Technically, this song is pretty perfect. Good staging? In my Eurovision 2011? It's more likely than you think. Nadine's got a hell of a voice too, this performance was really good and I think it really elevated the song which in and of itself isn't really for me.
Netherlands
Did something, like, happen in the jury rehearsals, or does the band have a bad reputation, or what, because bar that I really don't understand how this performed so poorly. It's not an incredibly amazing song but functionally it's really similar to the Danish entry that same year, like, how did one get fifth and the other one near last in the semi? I feel like I may have heard this song somewhere before getting into ESC because whenever I listen I always get this weird nostalgia for being, like, eleven years old.
Belgium
I feel the need to clarify here that I do a cappella at college. I think it's a really cool thing. I have zero hate for it. HOWEVER it really does not fit at Eurovision. Yknow how I'm always complaining about the stages looking empty? This song feels empty in that same way. It's a half-decent song and I think 1. a different arrangement or 2. a version with actual instruments could have worked pretty good but as is it's just not great. Also half these singers have no stage presence.
Slovakia
This is solid early-teens pop right here. I so so enjoy this chorus. Vocals are really not great though so that's probably why they didn't end up qualifying.
Ukraine
The staging here was so fucking good! Really did the most for this song. Anna Odobescu WISHES. The sand art... revolutionary. While the song has a good melody line, the rest of it I passively dislike, and I don't like Mika's voice.
Moldova
This is a jammin' song with a healthy side of Moldovan weirdness. There are bits of it that I'm maybe not so much a fan of (like the motorcycle girl, for example), but honestly those things really do add to the song so... it's for the best ig.
Sweden
Alright I know we all hate Eric Saade but Popular goes the fuck off. Like as a song it's just... idk I really like the intro and the bridge bit. It's kind of cringe now, especially with that styling, but for the most part I think it aged okay? And the dance routine was fun although I do wonder what was the deal actually with the glass breaking stuff, like was it actually glass or just something that looked like it yknow?
Cyprus
This is nice enough at the beginning but once the random girl starts singing it all goes downhill. Not sure what's supposed to be happening with the staging but I'm not a fan either, and the vocals are poor.
Bulgaria
Mmm, the Swedish broadcast (which I'm watching for these semis) kept glitching during this and did weird things to the rhythm... anyway. Na Inat is a really good song but I feel like a lot more could have been done with the staging - like there's that one clip of the second chorus that everyone always uses in videos but beyond that Poli really is just standing there. Also something weird happened musically between the bridge and the last chorus but I can't figure out what.
Macedonia
Strong beginning but it all goes downhill after that. Song is messy, I really dislike the singer's voice, and the staging is funky.
Israel
All due respect to Ms Dana International but there is very little I like about this performance. Her voice just doesn't sound good here like it did on Diva and the staging... just, like, nothing really happens? The chorus is ok I guess and the prechorus is also alright but just. There is simply nothing happening.
Slovenia
I don't feel the same love for this one that the rest of the fandom does, sadly. Maja is a good vocalist but I'm not overfond of her voice and there were parts of the staging that weren't super cohesive. The pink background was kinda ugly and also I did not like that dress.
Romania
I super unironically love this, actually? Like yes it's cheesy but for some reason it always makes me smile, like I just enjoy bopping around to this at whatever time of night I'm subjecting myself to Eurovision (lol).
Estonia
This is actually a really good song in studio but it just fell apart in live. Like, the outfits aren't nice to look at, and the live vocals were. Sooooo bad. The dance routine itself was actually kind of good but combined with the really awful live vocals from the backup singers and the outfits (and the bad 2011 stage) just means that Rockefeller Street's performance as a whole is solidly middle of the road for me.
Belarus
Ignoring the lyrics this song kinda goes off? Good vocals... the song isn't fantastic but I enjoy it nonetheless and the performance had a lot of energy (in a good way). And it certainly is memorable, because of the lyrics. I find blatant patriotism generally to be kind of off the mark in Eurovision but here it's combined with a good song so it's alright.
Latvia
This song is often remembered for the "luscious thighs" line, which... fair. And it's a solid, memorable chorus even without that. But I genuinely forgot about the rap section in this song? It isn't bad, like it's firmly in the middle of Watch My Dance on the bad end and One More Day on the good. Mostly this stage performance was kinda underwhelming. They really are just standing there bouncing around and it doesn't work for this song on this stage.
Denmark
This is another fan favorite that I dislike. It's... it's okay at best, like I said it's very on par with the Dutch entry. I don't like the singer's voice and the song is like... it's okay. The staging is weird especially at the bridge and last chorus where the lead singer just runs to the island and back and it takes him the entire latter third of the song.
Ireland
I think I went into this expecting to like it, which is never what you're supposed to do with Jedward's entries. If you expect or remember liking it, you're going to be disappointed. They're best when taken by surprise. The song is fun but I can't decide if Jedward's stage energy is a good or a bad thing... it sure is a lot.
My personal qualifiers
Romania
Bosnia & Herzegovina
Austria
Sweden
Slovakia
Moldova
Bulgaria
Ukraine
Belarus
Estonia
Miscellaneous thoughts
This popped into my head while watching the Irish postcard but like... it fascinates me how much ESC has embraced Irish Gaelic? Like the postcard for this year used it, there have been some instances where points presenters greet in Gaelic, Ireland sends entries in Irish to JESC... hopefully that is reflective of a larger linguistic revitalization, I really wonder.
The classical music breakdance thing was actually incredibly boring...
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Random reminder that even though the musical does make a big deal out of Parr being the survivor she actually only outlived Henry by one year. Cleves actually lived the longest out of all of the wives
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“ I’m happy that Moldova didn’t qualify because of the obvious plagiarism with the sand artist Get your own staging Moldova”
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Anna Odobescu (Moldova)
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40 - Moldova 🇲🇩 - Stay - Anna Odobescu
There have been many recent accusations of staging plagiarism in Eurovision. Sergey and Greta copying Måns and Hovig using Loïc's background visuals. Whilst I think it's always good to promote originality when it comes to delegations creating their staging, calls of plagiarism have always been debatable.
However, Moldova had no shame this year. Mika Newton didn't invent sand art, but why on earth would you replicate such a unique performance? And then downgrade it by not even doing the sand art live? It was so painfully obvious that what was happening on stage wasn't happening on the screen. Oh sorry, I meant snow art.
And they threw in an "Oooh she disappeared and reappeared gimmick". Booooo.
Moldova is usually a really fun Eurovision country but this just goes to show they shouldn't attempt 'serious'. They just can't execute them properly.
And what was even more unbelievable was that the juries ranked this as a qualifier! Thank God for the televote having some sort of taste.
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Oh no its the messy mess from Moldova that's tOtALLy not a copy of what ukraine did a few years back lmao
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Happy days!
Europe, we're on good terms now!
Iceland chose Hatari and thats AMAZING, honestly. They're so talented funny and it's even funnier when people don't realise when they're being ironic. (Listen to IMSLAND's cover of this song on youtube, it's brilliant!)
Moldova chose Anna Odobescu and tbh i'm not that into the song but i wasn't into the whole selection so i'm not mad and the song isn't bad!
Finland chose Look Away, I didn't really care which song they chose, it would be darude either way, but look away is a SNAZZY song and love it.
Norway chose KEiiNO which... i'm so happy. Norway said Saami rights. it's a snazzy song. Although, i do have a bone to pick. Mørland didn't even reach the gold final? Bad. But KEiiNO still won so :D
And finally, Portugal chose Conan Osiris! I remember a few weeks ago, writing a sign reading "vote for conan osiris, andrea demirovic and IMSLAND" so it's nice to see at least ONE of those wishes come true. Telemovies is a beautiful song so i'm glad it won.
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2010s Eurovision: 370 - 366
370. Argo - “Utopian Land”
Greece 2016
Let’s see, an unhappy, dirge-like song vibing some serious Death Cult realness, featuring the double whammy of bad singing AND bad rapping. It’s life-ending, honestly. But Argo happen to be best buds with Greece’s hotshot president, THAT TOTALLY MAKES UP FOR IT 🙃
369. The Humans - “Goodbye”
Romania 2018
[2018 Review here]
I laid out everything in my 2018 review, so I’ll just recap it in short: Anthem designed to encourage people with mental health issues instead unfolds in three minutes of romanticising depression and concern-trollery. Pro-tip: if you ever want to help someone going through a tough time, minimizing their issues and pointing out they’re feeling like crap for *no reason* is going to make matters even worse.
Also the song itself is boring and lifeless and dated and fake-sentimental, good lord I’m sinking back into depression just thinking of it SOMEBODY SAVE ME.
368. Anna Odobescu - “Stay”
Moldova 2019
WE HATE YOU KSENIYA SIMONOVA.
367. Mika Newton - “Angel”
Ukraine 2011
Seriously. Two *bad* songs that were carried way too far thanks to “sand art”. The art is beautiful, mind, but this is a fucking singing + live performance contest. The only reason to even have Kseniya there is with the intention to distract the audience from the song, which is lazy AND deceitful. Shaking my damn’ head
Of the two Kseniya entries though, I dislike “Stay” slightly more though. Yes, “Angel” reached an unfair, aneurysm-inducing FOURTH place in the Grand Final, but at least it was original at the time, you know? “Stay” borrowed the same gimmick, with a worse song AND the art wasn’t even live???? wtf.
366. Nodi Tatishvili & Sophie Gelovani - “Waterfall”
Georgia 2013
If you’ve followed this blog before, then you’ll know that dislike => ironic like => unironic love is a very common trajectory I go through with my entries; A much *less* common path, thankfully is indifference => ironic like => STRONG dislike but that’s exactly what I went through with waterfall. It’s SO ridiculously overdramatic, how could it not be hilarious live?
Unfortunately, it wasn’t. Turned out that Sophie & Nodi were personalitiless androids and had no idea how to emulate onscreen chemistry, who knews? It made the whole superbland, to the point that I now use the word “Waterfall-esque” to describe an extreme lack of authenticity between two singers. If that weren’t enough to convince you it’s shit, I’ll remind you “Waterfall” also caused “Crisalide”’s death in the semifinal 🙃
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Are those Mihai Eminescu and Veronica Micle
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Anna Odobescu (Moldova) on the Orange Carpet of the Opening Ceremony
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Tel Aviv 2019: Straight outta Moldova to Eurovision with a non-quirky song for once..?
Due to time constraints I am only allowing myself to post all of the reviews in limbo mode, mostly cutting down all paragraphs, including the actual review and NF bonus corner. In order to get a lot of these reviews out before their specific semifinals, I only will post the “factor” ratings during the present time, and a full review will be very much so instated only after sometime Eurovision is over - I can’t do “qualification factor” right after the semifinal, can I? I may do at most 1 proper review per day on time though, so keep up with ‘em!
Approval factor: that’s a large hard pass from me, sorry sis. And also sorry to Gorgi too, I knew he really wanted Eurovision for all these years, but he ended up with this and I’m just... no.
Follow-up factor: sucks to be a dreary balladeer when you go right after 2 flashy and colourful entries, right?
Qualification factor: this song barely even has any chances. I doubt that most of those ESC-tailored ballads that stay in NFs are often even that chanceful in the first place because... well... they often sound formulaic and I’m sick of ‘em. This may be voted though, but mostly your grandma who longs for the time Eurovision was just dramatic and/or soft love ballads being the real G. I don’t think anyone else will be buying into the sand shtick, sadly.
Good luck to Moldova though!
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