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heyyallitsbethfanfic · 24 days

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Check Yes, Rat

On the 76th floor of Aincrad, a brigade of crusaders sat in the newly established bar of Agil. The party seemed to grow larger over time, now that the engine of Sword Art Online was unstable, bringing in unsuspecting hostages from other games, as well as trapping unfortunate souls within the backrooms of the code, the Hollow Area. Luckily, a raven haired boy had been there to catch the strays from Alfheim, GunGale and the Hollow Area, Leafa, Sinon and Philia. But even with a party growing ever larger, their leads on where to go from here were drying up. Assuming there even was somewhere to go from here, now that the game’s creator, Akihiko Kayaba had been killed.

The black swordsman fidgeted in his seat before pulling up a message prompt.

“Look’s like we’re out of options. Last resort.”

The party looked on inquisitively as he effortlessly flicked out a message to the one person he trusted the most, but hadn’t spoken to in months.

“Kirito? Who are you messaging?” Asuna leaned against her partner.

“Oh, just our old mutual friend… With her skill and… Persistence... she’s probably already on the 76th floor.”

The rest of the party stiffened at the word “her”. While no words were spoken, the thought of another girl in their group caused a momentary flare of jealousy lost on the boy, who was struggling with his words.

“We’ve spoken a bit after the beta but… Not since Asuna and I were married. God this will be awkward.” Kirito shuddered at the thought, a chill down his spine.

“Ah Kii-boy, lookin for me huh?”

A shadow of beige and blonde fell behind Kirito who jumped from his seat. The rest of the party glared daggers at him “Kii-boy?”

“Je-jeez…” Kirito clutched his chest and smirked “Agil didn’t tell me this bar had a rat problem…” He absentmindedly tussled the blonde hair of the short cloaked figure standing beside the group.

“Heheh. Just missin’ ya Kii-boy. And I knew the best place ta look was anywhere that had the most pretty gals hangin’ about.” Her gaze drifted to the table of friends “Looks like I was spot on huh?”

“Well, your info is always spot on aint it?”

The group expected Kirito to emit a flustered response, as he did with every other girl’s teasing. But was met with a confidence ill-fitting the boy.

“Umm Kazuto who is this?” Leafa spoke up, asking the question everyone was too afraid to ask.

“Ah Kii-boy, you never told your galpals about your best friend? I’m hurt.” The rat’s tone shifted at ‘best friend’ with seductive, teasing tone that was picked up by everyone at the table.

“Heh. I know you well enough that if I shared any info about ya you’d make me pay.” Kirito giggled, a foreign sight to the party, as it seemed that only his daughter Yui could make him laugh.

“Aw, after all this time still considerin’ the feelin’s of lil ol me?”

“Nope, just your business.”

“Nyehehe. Well, I’ll give yall this info for free. I’m Argo.” The cloaked girl extended her hand to Leafa.

“Or you can call her a Rat, right Asuna?” Kirito looked at Asuna, who was trying to stifle a laugh at the rest of the group.

“Yeah. This is our good rat Argo. She’s an info broker, and has been playing with Kirito since the beta.”

Leafa took the girl’s hand and briskly shook it. “Nice to meet you. I’m Kirito’s sister.”

The Rat looked taken aback for a moment, then snickered. “Ah Sugu! I’m surprised ya don’t remember me! Guess Kii-boy is the same IRL as in here, I must’ve just been another pretty gal he took home. Nyehehehe.”

“Aaaaaaaaaand I am gonna get a very, very, VERY stern talking to tonight. By a lot of people.” Kirito thought to himself.

“What? Kazuto never brought anyone home! Did you come in through a window or something?” Leafa was startled at the thought. “Another girl with Kazuto? In our home? And he was HIDING her?”

“Nyehehe. If you want any more info on me and Kii-boy you’ll need to buy it.” She pulled out her menu, and tapped a few submenus, one labelled ‘All Info On Kii-boy’. The girl’s looked on in horror as Argo scrolled through pages upon pages of info, all locked behind various Cor amounts. One even hit the cap, at absolute max Cor.

“Y’know, now that Sugu is here, I should offer a bit more to those bounties. Don’t need her to have that much ammo on me.” He lightly teased, but shot Argo a quick cash-injection.

“Aw Kii-boy, you really that scared about a lil, tiny, itty bitty secret like that?” She smirked knowingly.

“Oooooo Kirito and somethin ‘lil tiny itty bitty’? Color me curious~ Always suspected those two swords were compensatin’ for somethin~” Liz was laughing, she wouldn’t say it, but her mind travelled to places she would NEVER willingly admit.

“No, it aint that. ‘Sides, if you want that info so bad, you could just ask Asuna or Sugu for cheaper.”

“S-sugu?!?!?!” Philia slammed her drink down on the table, shaking the whole table.

“Yeah… Hate to say it, but that wouldn’t exactly be his ‘little’ secret” Leafa blushed, trying to look anywhere but the table.

“Gross.” Sinon shook her head and rested it on a fist. “This guy even hittin on his own sister? Shouldn’t be surprised…”

Kirito laughed to himself.

“Yea. Leafa here’s a real perv. Had to get a lock on our bathroom door cuz she kept peekin’ in on me showering.”

“K-KAZUTO!” The poor sylph went a crimson red.

“Nyeheheh. This is gold, pure gold.”

“Jeez Kirito. Sayin’ stuff like that when your wife’s in the room.” Liz teased at the boy.

Both Argo and Asuna moved to speak but were cut off by Kirito.

“You’re one to talk Liz, after you and Philia took me to a hot spring just to try and get a peek too.”

The pair of girls flushed as Asuna, Argo and Kirito all laughed.

“Jeez Kii-boy, you got busy with me out of pitcha. Any girls here who didn’t have their virgin eyes tainted by ya?”

Sinon and Silica went from pale to a light pink blush. Sinon played with her fingers, and Silica grabbed onto Pina for support.

“Nyehehehe. No wonder ya wanna keep that info a secret Kii-boy.”

Argo finally took a moment to pull up a chair to the table, right next to Kirito and Asuna, resting her head against the former.

“Yeah. Don’t want the mob against ya.” Kirito flicked the forehead of the rat.

“Ah our poor beata’. Always the lightnin rod of hate.”

“Um. I’m sorry but could you tell us who Kirito is to you Miss Argo?” Silica pouted in her seat. “She’s so bold… Only Asuna is ever that touchy with Kirito…”

“Oh I’m just ya friendly neighbahood rat. Unless ya got the Cor to spend~” She rubbed her thumb against her index and middle finger, telling them silently ‘pay up’.

“Good thing Leafa is so oblivious, otherwise it wouldn’t be much of a secret.” Asuna laughed out.

“Oh I’m great at hidin’, dontcha worry your pretty lil head A-chan”

“Wait. With all of us here, we could probably pool enough Cor to buy the info.” Sinon spoke up with a taunting smile.

Both Argo and Kirito gulped, Argo’s facade of confidence quickly deteriorated as the girls began counting cor together.

“Waitwaitwait-”

“Suppose we brought this on ourselves.” Kirito shook his head. “I am gonna get killed tonight.”

…

“So firstly, how exactly do you know Kirito?” Silica frowned out.

“I may be a rat, but I don’t lie. Kii-boy and I met in SAO’s beta days, and partied together to test some features.”

“That’s a shock. Kirito always hated getting involved in guilds and parties.” Liz looked upset at the idea of Kirito and this girl hanging out like that.

“Argo basically forced me into it.”

“Nyeheheh. You never complained, did ya?”

“Oh I did constantly, you just ignored me.”

“Anyways, that’s why I had ta visit him IRL. Gotta make sure alllllll~ the sensations in SAO matched outside.” She playfully teased out at the girls.

“Um. Kirito what exactly were you and Argo testing?” Philia slumped down with her head resting against the table, utterly defeated.

“Oh Kii-boy is wonderful~ he was so kind to do everything~ I asked of him.”

Kirito sighed, knowing Argo would simply make things worse from here.

“Argo and I were the only pair of guy and girl beta testers who remotely liked eachother’s presence. So we got a bit of a direct order from the top to test a few things.”

Kirito lifted up his hand to the party, revealing his shining silver wedding band.

“Argo and I were asked to test the wedding feature, and all of the benefits.”

The air in the room was frozen. The tense atmosphere could be cut with a knife. But it was cut short by the snort and stifled laugh of Asuna.

“Heh. Dorks.”

“Asuna?! Aren’t you upset at this homewrecker!” Liz shouted out at her friend.

“Please. If anything it’s the other way around.” Asuna smiled softly and wrapped her fingers in an embrace with Kirito’s.

“If anything, I think Asuna might just like to watch.” Sinon muttered bluntly.

“Nyeheheh. We could give her a good show Sinonon~”

“Wait so when you say you had to test all the sensations-” Leafa’s eyes got wide

“Nyehehehehehe. There’s a reason Kii-boy gotcha those noise-cancellin’ headphones Sugu.”

Leafa buried her head in her hands in embarrassment.

“Wait so you and Kirito?...” Liz’s voice was weak and trailed off.

“Yuh huh! The whole nine yards! Kii-boy really knows how to treat a lady~, right A-chan?”

Asuna blushed at the Rat’s question.

“Jeez… I would’ve liked to think I’d recognize when Kazuto brought a girl home…” Leafa sulked.

“So Kirito’s first time wasn’t with Asuna?” Silica was practically hyperventilating.

The boy and the rat shared a laugh as Kirito stroked the hair of the small beast tamer.

“Eh, there’s some stuff only A-chan can provide of course.” Argo pressed her index fingers against eachother.

“Don’t feel bad about not realizing I brought home Argo, Sugu. Not like she goes by that name IRL.” The boy smirked and looked down at Argo.

“Oh playin with fire Kii-boy? You know you’ll get burned.”

“After this conversation, I’m gonna get killed anyways. Might as well have some fun with it.”

“Nyehehe. I suppose that’s fair. But yea, chin up Leafa. You probably wouldntve noticed lil ol me. I’m sure im not the only ~boyfriend~ Kii-boy brought home” The rat laughed and Kirito blushed.

“B-BOYFRIEND???” The table blurted out.

“Wait Argo does that mean you’re a guy? And Kirito is-” Silica looked at Kirito, eyes widening.

Sinon’s head filled with a word that’d get her banned from various public forums, even if she could reclaim it.

“Guy? No. Bisexual? Yes.” Argo answered bluntly.

“This funky rat is transgender. But she’s as much of a girl as any of yall. And if I hear anything against it…” He lightly tapped his a sword on his back.

“Oh. Huh. Neat. Me too actually.” Sinon chirped, pleasantly surprised. “And now that I know Kirito likes girls like me…”

“Wait wait wait I feel like we’re glossing over the whole ‘Kirito has two wives’ bit.” Philia butted in. “I feel like that is important to address.”

“We’re stuck in a death game and you’re worried about the ethics of polyamory?” Asuna coldly responded. “With how much you all flirt with my husband I’d assumed you were fine with it.”

The table turned to bickering and gossiping as Kirito and Argo slinked away.

“Well that went better than expected.” Argo let out a breath she didn’t even realize she’d been holding.

“Yeah. I’m just glad they didn’t ask who was the top.”

Kirito and Argo laughed to themselves before discussing plans for clearing the future floors. Now the group had gotten larger yet again. But something struck itself in Kirito’s head.

“Hmm both Argo and Sinon huh… I wonder if I’m…” the thought cut itself short, and they shook their head “heh. We can worry about that silly thought later.”

#sao #sao fanfic #sword art online fic #sword art online #argo the rat #trans headcanon

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