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joof-osc-alt · 9 months ago

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Battle For Something Neat

35 contestants. 1 prize. What is it? Nobody knows. Is it worth it? Platey says so!

A WIP object show by @joofie404.

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CAST (non-contestants)

Platey | Gender: Male, He/Him | The Host Platey is the official host of Battle For Something Neat! Owning a loud, jovial, and boisterous personality, he's done this show several times before; but he just knows this one will be the best run yet! He's rounded up 35 contestants in order to put them into numerous scenarios he's crafted himself until one wins the ultimate prize: ...Something! Some contestants think he doesn't even know what the prize is himself. He has a somewhat sketchy past. Fun Fact: He hates water.

Mini-Plates | Genders: Unknown | Co-Hosts The Mini-Plates are Platey's assistants and camera crew! Often confused to be his children, they actually aren't. As far as the public knows, they only exist to follow the contestants around and broadcast the good stuff to the viewers. Ask any contestant and they'll say they're far too nosey. Fun Fact: They've gone through three sets of equipment in one season.

Medkit | Gender: Female, She/Her | Recovery Way back on Platey's first show, there wasn't a recovery machine. He assumed it wouldn't be needed, that his challenges were perfect and nobody could possibly die during them. One unsurprising casualty during an underwater challenge later, Platey changed his mind. So, instead of getting a recovery machine like all the other hosts, he just hired Medkit to collect the remains of unfortunate contestants and fix em right up. It's a bit more complicated than just buying a recovery machine, but we never said Platey was a generous host. Besides, the contestants seem to like it when she calls them sugar and hands out lollipops after each recovery, so no harm done. Fun Fact: She doesn't have a medical license.

Janitor Cart | Gender: Male, He/Him | Janitor Janitor Cart isn't the most interesting object out there. He doesn't have a crazy story, or any real motivation, and he isn't even a contestant. He just cleans the messes, packs up the challenges, avoids the camera, and then at the end of the day goes home to eat an underwhelming, cold dinner. When he does show up on camera however, he might try and do something cool to make himself known a bit. Platey doesn't like that. Fun Fact: He lives with his mom, Mop.

CAST (contestants)

Lotus | Gender: Male, He/Him, FtM Trans | Contestant 1 Lotus really, really wants to be someone special. He's just kinda been there for most of his life, a pushover in the background, but now he has a chance to do something big! If he wins this contest he'll be known all over, so he's going to do it no matter what. He's not the strongest, or the smartest, but his determination is off the charts! He'll push himself to his very limit to make a name for himself. Unfortunately however, his determination tends to fall flat when it comes to interacting with others. Fun Fact: He can float because his head is so light.

Flashlight | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 2 Flashlights are often seen as beacons of light to bravely navigate the dark with, but Flashlight is seemingly anything but that. He's skittish, paranoid, and always assumes the worst by default. He's somewhat at ease around his friends (like Lotus, his best friend!), but his jumpy nature is prone to being taken advantage of by some of the more mean-spirited contestants. When he gets too spooked however, he happens to shut down and undertake an entirely new persona, that of a steely-faced, unresponsive, object oriented powerhouse that doesn't stop until he's out of the dark. Nobody knows why or how. Fun Fact: His light flickers when he's scared.

Lampy | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 3 Lampy loves to learn and share her knowledge with others! She's a massive bookworm and has read entire libraries worth, when you need to know something it's her other contestants usually turn to. She prides herself on this, mainly because she isn't very confident in herself in any other remarks. She's friends with Lotus and Flashlight, but finds herself torn between an alliance with them or with her fellow intellectuals Olive and Macchiato. Fun Fact: She's read 719,385 books.

Cookie | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 4 Wait, who let a random kid on set? Nope, turns out he's actually a contestant! Platey doesn't seem to have an age limit for who can or can't participate, so here's Cookie. He's bright-eyed, excitable, and innocent as ever, simply here to have fun. Allowing a 6 year old to participate in a show hinged around deadly challenges raises some ethical concerns about the host, but Platey isn't accepting feedback. Fun Fact: His mom has no idea where he is. She's not happy.

Candy | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 5 Cookie's best friend, Candy doesn't know where she is, who these people are, or that she's on a show for that matter. She was just following Cookie around when he entered the show, and now she's here too. She's in it for good now, no backing out! She's not as loud or excitable as her friend, having a more quiet and passive personality. Likely because she never knows what's going on. Fun Fact: She had a plush Loser, but she lost it on her way to the show.

Hammer | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 6 Hailing from a solitary cabin in the Gracka Mountains, Hammer is very strong and self-reliant thanks to his off-grid lifestyle. Years intentionally spent in the forest avoiding civilization would probably be undertaken by someone who doesn't like people, but not Hammer! He's a very warm and extroverted person, believe it or not. Strategic, strong, and loved by all, there's not many challenges he has the potential to lose. Fun Fact: He has a PhD in Grubbian literature.

Canned Lobster | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 7 Canned Lobster, just a guy. He's quiet, reserved, sluggish, and generally just not very enthusiastic. It's not that he doesn't want to compete, he still participates in each challenge. He just does so without much fanfare, from himself or others. He has a caring side to those who choose to bear through the wet blanket that is his exterior, and those who continue to poke around can find just why he's so downtrodden all the time; he really, really hates being a can of lobsters. Fun Fact: He's extremely envious of Crystal, but is still open to his advances in friendship.

Macchiato | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 8 Macchiato is very similar to Lampy in several manners. Both have read countless books, pride themselves on their intelligence, and endlessly pursue further knowledge. Macchiato, however, has always viewed this pursuit of academics as a competition. Lampy learns for fun and to be helpful, while Macchiato would gladly work himself to death with his books if it meant knowing just one thing Lampy didn't! He acts very smug and self-confident, but whenever he starts falling behind he drops the act. Fun Fact: He doesn't need glasses. He just wears them to look smart.

Chainsaw | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 8 Chainsaw is a very polite and kind object; that is, until she manages to pull her cord. Whether by accident or her own accord, getting her blade running jumpstarts her unpredictable, violent, and very sharp-toothed self, sending her into a destructive frenzy that more often than not leaves the room in shambles. When she's not excited she's far more interactable, but that doesn't make the other objects any less scared of her. Fun Fact: She's been to prison.

Lilypad | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 9 Lily Pad is a kind, good-hearted lover of nature with an undying devotion to all things green. She has a pet frog named Frog that she carries around her at all times too, isn't it adorable? Lily Pad loves it to bits! Frog, however, is able to talk to Lily Pad. It tells her to do things. Terrible things. And even worse, she rarely says no. Nobody likes Frog. Fun Fact: She's actually terrified of bugs.

Olive | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 11 Olive is an evil genius with a knack for robots and gadgets. He'll use his arsenal of tech to cheat and cut corners in challenges, often rejecting most alliances in favor of letting the others lose to him. He's so evil, he built his own robot to be a double for him in case he gets eliminated. What a jerk! Fun Fact: He HATES Martini.

Android | Gender: None, They/Them/It | Contestant 12 Android is a robot, built specifically to net Olive that prize in the event he is eliminated. Integrated with a burning need to please it's creator, Android carries out every order and task with little to no complications. However, upon observing the other contestants, it might be developing a mind of it's own. Fun Fact: It can run Doom.

Sketchpad | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 13 Sketchpad is an acquired taste. She may look and act cute at times, but she's also rude, obnoxious, hotheaded, and mischievous, and her evil laugh could drive any normal person up the wall. Despite this, she's the leader of the longest running alliance in show history, composed of her and two friends who are just as stuck to her as she is to them. They are the Mischief Makers, and their goal is to cause chaos in the most entertaining way possible, together! Despite what appearances may lead you to believe, Sporky and S'more are not to be mistaken for henchmen. They are Sketchpad's best friends for life and she WILL make it known. Fun Fact: She loves hosting tea parties for her and her friends. She doesn't care what you think about that.

Sporky | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 14 Sporky is a bit odd. He's often known as somewhat of a weirdo, owning a spacey demeanor and extremely unconventional thought process. His ideas and solutions typically seem odd at first, but fall together spectacularly over time if not interrupted by others. He's additionally a very well-composed person, if not the most in the entire cast. Fun Fact: He makes wonderful treats.

S'more | Gender: Nonbinary, They/Them | Contestant 15 S'more is a very soft, polite, and somewhat airheaded object, not someone you'd expect to be in a group dedicated to causing chaos. Yet here they are, a beloved member of the Mischief Makers alongside their friends Sketchpad and Sporky. And they're doing just fine too, they often need a bit of assistance in the actual mischief making but the other two are glad to accomodate, ensuring equal mayhem opportunities for all three. There's been debate on if Sporky and Sketchpad are just bad influences, but S'more doesn't care at all. They're their best friends. Fun Fact: S'more and Sporky were friends before meeting Sketchpad.

Malicious Concoction | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 16 Malicious Concoction isn't the most morally sound object out there. Sure, she's not a serial killer or anything, but her favorite thing to do just happens to be defying the laws of life itself. A seasoned mad scientist, she's done many things; something as small as creating a ray gun that can swap two objects, all the way to actually resurrecting the dead. Does she care about the potential moral retribution for an action of that gravity? ...Nope! Fun Fact: Her liquid is corrosive and tastes like pain.

Roquefort | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 17 Roquefort, a solitary, steely crime-buster, was a detective a couple decades back. He was specifically known for his style of work being premeditated, relentless, and not particularly merciful to wrongdoers. Eventually he died from smoking too much, and was buried a few miles away from Yeebinhall Castle. Nobody knows why he wanted that. A few decades later, he's found himself risen from the grave thanks to a stray lightning bolt from one of Malicious Concoction's experiments! Raising the dead isn't exactly legal, so it seems Roquefort has one more misdemeanor to punish before resting for good... that is, if Platey didn't just make him a contestant. Dead people don't have rights and can't object, he says. Roquefort is very confused over the whole thing. Fun Fact: He loves soap operas.

Crystal | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 18 Crystal as a person is many things. He's an artist, a cook, a reliable friend, a valuable team member, the list goes on. Unfortunately, all that is typically overlooked by others because he's simply just so beautiful! He's shiny, stunning, he can light up a room with just his presence... and he hates it. He's tired of being the center of attention for just his shiny appearance, he really wishes people would see him for the type of person he is. Fun Fact: He'd prefer to wear covering clothing while outside, but there's nothing that fits his spiky top.

Boxing Glove | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 19 Boxing Glove is a tried and true adrenaline junkie, all the way from her headband to her stick legs. Regular things and experiences don't phase her anymore, and she relies on dangerous sports and fist fights to keep herself entertaining. She's a very generous person who loves to share the fun with people she likes, but unfortunately, not everyone shares her enthusiasm for near death experiences. Fun Fact: Her workout routine consists of punching trees, concrete, more trees, and rude customers at fast food joints.

Cotton Candy | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 20 Cotton Candy is a lovable ball of energy that just wants to have fun! You'll never catch her without a smile on her face. That's not to say she's incapable of negativity. She just also experiences anger or annoyment whilst smiling, leading to quite the juxtaposition of feelings when she's mad at you. It's also somewhat difficult to tell when exactly she's mad at you, as her brutal honesty can make it seem like she dislikes you right off the bat. Her true opinion of others, in actuality, simply stems from their vibe. Fun Fact: She can dance really well.

Tungsten Sphere | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 21 Nobody likes Tungsten Sphere. He's annoying, geeky, self-absorbed, nosy, completely unaware of personal space, and he insists his name is spelled Tongstein Spharre. He thinks everybody likes him and easily gets upset when people show that, big surprise, they don't. He doesn't even participate in challenges correctly; he just bruteforces them with his formidable weight. Maybe, within his tough metal shell, there's a heart of gold? Nope, we checked. Fun Fact: He loves Sonic games.

Frying Pan | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 22 Frying Pan is a lovely person! She loves cooking and caring for others, and is always there to help. She's friendly and motherly, even going as far as to take care of Cookie and Candy while they're on set without parents. Don't test her, however. She may be kind, but she is not a tolerant person. And with each altercation, she grows closer and closer to snapping. Fun Fact: Since they can be recovered, she strategically murders other contestants she doesn't like during challenges to blow off steam.

Winey | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 23 Winey is a bestselling author and owner of an extensive alcohol company, she is very, VERY wealthy. She lives a lavish lifestyle with a big house and everything, and her personality makes that clear. She's vain and somewhat haughty, albeit not entirely unapproachable. She actually feels like she's missing something in her life, and is hoping to find it in this competition. Fun Fact: Her type of wine is Sauternes.

Baseball Bat | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 24 Despite the prize's true identity being a mystery, Baseball Bat is convinced it's money. He wants the money. As a thief he's done worse for less, so he's going to do whatever it takes to win the contest, even if it means pretending to be friends with fellow contestants. Unless he gets attached, that'd be inconvenient. Fun Fact: He's tried and failed to rob Winey before.

Penne | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 25 Penne is an italian chef who tends to be neurotic and finnicky, yet he's still managed to build and manage his pride and joy restaurant, Penne's Pizza Pasta Place. Everything was going just fine, at least until his business entered a dry era. He couldn't afford to keep it open, so he took far too many "donations" from people he shouldn't have, and he doesn't have much time to pay it back before his business is taken. So, here he is, on Battle For Something Neat, hoping the prize will give him just what he needs to keep his livelihood. Fun Fact: He's a mountain of parodies.

Paper Shredder | Gender: Unknown, They/Them/It | Contestant 26 Paper Shredder is sort of creepy. They don't show much emotion beyond a vacant stare and unnerving smile, they rarely say a word, and they tend to appear when you least expect it. On top of that they seem to be subtly malicious, not at all objecting to the idea of being used as a device to threaten Sketchpad. Most prefer to stay away from this one. Fun Fact: They were kicked out of a previous show, Contest For Ideal Landmass, for tampering with the recovery centers.

Martini | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 27 Martini is the life of the party, never stopping the celebration for anything. He's always peppy and upbeat, looking for the next thing worth partying about. Many say he's fun to be around, but some see him as a nuisance or even a danger. One thing everyone can agree about is that he isn't allowed to drive. That never ended well. He really doesn't like Olive. Fun Fact: He's almost permanently slightly drunk.

Dynamite | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 28 Dynamite. Famous movie star and stuntman, heralded as THE badass of the century. He runs! He flies! He kicks ass! He tells kids not to smoke! He even has his own theme song for crying out loud! Everyone thinks he's the coolest. Fighting evil is embedded in his very identity, but he's still somewhat of a jerk. Some say it's in a cool way, that is until their door is the one being disregarded for a cool scene where he jumps through a window. His hat is his most prized possession. Fun Fact: He's been in the movies ever since he was a little firecracker.

Sheet | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 29 Sheet was a contestant on the first run of Battle For Something Neat. Around that time there were no recovery options, so when Sheet got stuck in the flooded Boonko Canyon and perished, she was gone for real. At least, until she came back as a ghost to continue competing. She's still dead set on winning despite being a specter, believing it will finally allow her to move on. Despite that, she's grown quite comfy with being a ghost, using her abilities to float and pass through walls in order to cheese challenges and spook fellow contestants. She finds it funny. Fun Fact: She won't say it, but she actually still does miss living.

Outlet | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 30 Outlet, bluntly, is a very unstable contestant. He has little consideration for the consequences of his actions on others, doing whatever he wants for either his own entertainment or spite for those he doesn't like. On first glance he has a friendly, whimsical personality, but underneath it, he behaves extremely erratically, showing no qualms in frightening, harming or even outright murdering his fellow contestants simply for a good laugh. His antics go so far, the Mischief Makers have declared him their arch-nemesis, dedicating endeavors to stopping his chaos. Fun Fact: A lack of recoverers would not halt his shenanigans.

Cherry Blossom Tree | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 31 Cherry Blossom Tree is a very passive and forgiving person, believing her existence on this planet is to help others and diffuse conflict, even at her own expense. This is unfortunately often taken advantage of by more malicious contestants such as Olive or Outlet, and her own terrible luck on top of that frequently leaves her unable to catch a break. She doesn't have any friends. Fun Fact: She loves sweets.

Marble Block | Gender: Male, He/Him | Contestant 32 Marble Block is a true artisan, a lover of the arts through and through! He's a fine painter/sculpter, and he's currently pursuing his dreams of having his own studio, even after having been kicked out of many art classes. He's even the one who generously drew Sketchpad's persona for her! He's not just an artist though; he's also a true connoisseur, actively seeking out the artistic value of anything he sees, really. Most see this as simply annoying, however. Fun Fact: His corner chip was caused by slipping on paint and hitting a table edge.

Skateboard | Gender: Awesome, Rad/ical (male, he/him) | Contestant 33 Skateboard is absolutely obsessed with being the coolest. He speaks entirely in slang, constantly tries to pull off sick tricks, and has shaped his entire personality around embodying coolness. Unfortunately, his true colors shine merely as an annoying klutz that can't even stick a landing. There's a bit more to him when he drops the cool guy persona, but it takes a lot to get it out of him. Fun Fact: He and Boxing Glove are practically siblings.

Valentine's Day Chocolate | Gender: Female, She/Her | Contestant 34 Valentine's Day Chocolate is completely incapable of getting her feelings in check. Love is a weekly thing for her, she falls for others frequently and she falls for them HARD. When she does, she ends up fixating on that person. There's typically three phases: Phase 1, following them around, kicking feet whilst thinking of them in bed, and writing love letters. Phase 2, making flirtatious remarks, stalking, and acting generally down bad. And lastly phase 3, outright professions of love and attempting to initiate any sort of romantic interaction until she loses interest and moves on to the next unfortunate soul. There is no cure, many have tried. Fun Fact: If someone were to reciprocate her feelings, she wouldn't know how to act.

Doohickey | Gender: Some sort of alien gender we can't comprehend, Xe/Xem | Contestant 35 Doohickey came straight from space, arriving from the stars in a UFO seemingly just to compete. Everything about xem is an enigma; from xeir personality to language to overall functions, moreso that last part. Doohickey has numerous abilities and functions yet to be discovered or applied to general living, including flashing multiple colors unseen to the eye before or turning items inserted into xeir funnel into green bubbles. Fun Fact: Xey're from a planet called Xyrfgnorkov.

MECHANICS:

Challenges: Challenges work a bit differently than the average object show, being more grandiose and complicated. The average challenge consists of Platey taking the contestants to a new location and giving them an objective, such as Yeebinhall Castle with the goal of finding it's legendary secret, or a submarine to make it to the bottom of Chuffle Ocean. Every once in a while Platey throws in a twist or two, extending the challenge or turning it on its head to keep viewers engaged and contestants on their toes.

Alliances: Contestants are allowed and encouraged to work together. Contestants who win a challenge together in an alliance all reap the benefit of immunity, and can share the winner's room! There can still be only one ultimate winner however, so betrayals are not uncommon.

Death: The challenges being risky is what makes them so fun to watch, and recoverers are what allow them to be so dangerous. Contestants being killed, either by the challenge, an accident, or murder from another contestant is perfectly normal on set, as long as the body can be recovered by Medkit to be revived. Revived contestants spend a bit in her tent until they're ready to go.

House of Contestants: Instead of buying dorms or a hotel, contestants spend their time away from challenges inside the House of Contestants. It's a nice house with two bedrooms, a fancy one and a large one. Contestants all sleep in that one large bedroom together, and despite it being a little cramped, it's not all too bad. Except when Tungsten Sphere rolls around while sleeping.

Winners Room: The winners of a challenge don't have to use the standard contestant room, instead being given the Winner's Room! It's luxurious, spacious, comfy, and comes with its own kitchen and tv! The winners can allow whoever they want inside, but being stingy is encouraged.

Voting and Eliminations: After each episode, viewers are instructed to vote for a contestant. The intention of the vote can vary between episodes, maybe for eliminating a contestant in one or saving them for another. The contestant with the least votes to leave/most votes to stay gets a prize, while the contestant with the most votes to leave/least votes to stay is eliminated and sent... somewhere.

Final Challenge: When only five contestants remain, there's just one challenge left. The final challenge, a bigger, bolder, nerve-wracking fight to the finish for the ultimate prize. Alliances are null here, only one can win!

THE SOMETHING: It's the prize! Platey says it's super awesome, and most contestants are pretty hyped over it, but nobody actually knows what it is. Some believe Platey just hasn't thought it up yet.

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