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#BUT FR THO THIS CH WAS ONE OF MY FAV
laxmiree · 2 years
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MLQC Season 2 Chapter 24 - Lucien’s part Translation (Part 1)
⚠️  SPOILER ALERT  ⚠️
This post contains a VERY HEAVY SPOILER for the chapter that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if  there are any mistakes in the translation~
IMPORTANT!!!  to fully understand the story, prior knowledge of previous S2 chapters are needed. Before, I made a short summary that explain those chapters. I hope this can help :D
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Before we start, this chapter referenced S2 chapter 20 so you might want to check them out first :D.
Also, I’m going to call 502 ‘residual intelligence’ just like the official translation hopefully i’m not remembering wrong
[Chapter 24-1]
MC received an invitation from BS to attend a meeting. When she attended the meeting, Victor wasn’t not here and instead she met with Dionysus and Poseidon. MC was arguing with Dionysus before Poseidon ‘interrupted’ them. The meeting didn’t proceed very smoothly.
After leaving BS Tower, MC drove down the road by the sea. But a hand suddenly appeared and controlled her car. Not only that, her car also accelerating slowly, as if a foot was on the accelerator. She ended up plummeting into the sea.
[Chapter 24-2]
At the bottom of the sea, MC spot a familiar stone tablet with thistles and thorns over it. She successfully entered the Lighthouse. A silver light suddenly appeared out of thin air; Joker, his lackey (a teenager named Yi), and Lucien stepped out from that silver arc and entered the same Lighthouse. MC was on stairs above them.
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??: If it's just you who make a fuss, then I'll throw you into the ocean!
The innocent and cruel voice kept echoing in the lighthouse. Following the voice, the teenager came running out with a clatter, and an indifferent Joker followed him.
But the silver light didn't end there, a pair of white leather shoes stepped in with it, the hem of his coat gently raised behind him.
My eyes slowly widened as I stared intently at that figure.
Why is… Lucien here?
Why is he working together with Joker?!
Lucien glanced at the patterned wall, a layer of interest and questions appearing in his eyes.
His gaze was cast aside on the glowing stairs, and then his eyes gradually went up-
Before he raised his head, I hurriedly withdrew my peeking head.
Teenager: Even if we let you come here, it doesn't mean we trust you.
The teenager's disgruntled voice was heard, wrapped in a strong sense of hostility.
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Lucien: I don't need your trust. As long as we can maintain cooperation and figure out the trade-offs, it doesn't matter if there is no trust.
Teenager: You…
I quietly peeked out again and saw the teenager reaching out to point a finger at Lucien, while Joker, who seemed not to care about any of it, was facing the wall alone and contemplating something.
Teenager: You obviously haven't done anything, and you still have the nerve to share our information!
Lucien stopped saying anything, as if he was just facing a child's rascality, and turned to look at the wall.
Teenager: You…!
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Joker: Yi, you talk a bit too much.
Without averting his gaze, Joker directly stopped the teenager's next sentence.
Joker: It's convenient to be friends with smart people, and the shared information and answers make the calculations easier. Don't you think so, Professor Lucien?
Lucien lowered his eyes, not answering his question, only touching to the spot where the fluorescent light had flowed.
Lucien: The interior of the building is indeed different from what we have seen before, and what we have just seen.
Joker: Professor Lucien, what do you think?
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Lucien: Each building has the same symbol, but the textures of the words are different. After the starlight appeared, all the stone slabs glowed with a flickering light, and from the theory maybe it was those unknown light trails that affected it.
Lucien: According to your previous description, after someone took you into the lighthouse, the same phenomenon as the walls lighting up at this moment occurred. Then, there is only one answer.
He looked towards Joker, who had been waiting for a long time, and arrogantly raised an icy smile.
Lucien: Someone turned it on, and that person is here now.
Lucien's words, one by one, pressed down on my heart and kept on sinking down.
Teenager: Really? Wow, it's getting fun! But it's so big here, how can we find it?!
I slowly retreated and moved towards the upper stairs.
But I knew I was heading towards a dead end, and as long as they walked up the mysteriously fluorescent stairs… they would definitely discover my presence.
But as they say, there's plenty of room here, so maybe they will overlook this staircase too.
Teenager: Hell! Then let's find a way up on this strange stair!
…What a bad luck.
[Chapter 24-3]
As the sounds footsteps keep approaching her. MC tried to find another way to hide. She remembered ‘19’, a lighthouse she met before. Trying her luck, she tried to talk to the residual intelligence inside that lighthouse.
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MC: Hello, are you also the same being as 19?
I tried to keep my voice soft and pressed my fingertips against the rough wall as my last desperate attempt.
??: Yes, my baby. After analyzing the data, this era seems to use this title to address someone who is dear to their heart.
??: Baby, just call me 502. We've been waiting for you for a long time. Welcome to the lighthouse.
Just as expected!
An electronic voice with a different tone but similar sound style to the last one came from the empty lighthouse.
Compared to the strange title, I was so pleasantly surprised that I almost shed tears.
Teenager: What? What is this? A lighthouse?
The clattering footsteps got farther and farther away and returned to the lowest part of the open space, where they looked around.
I poked my head down the steps slightly, the glowing lines lighting up the stone floor and illuminating Lucien's rare expression of surprise.
Joker's pupils dilated slightly, and while he raised a smile, his eyebrows were tightly knitted together again.
It was like disbelief and surprise.
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Joker: Lighthouse… are you called a lighthouse?
The only response to Joker was silence.
Lucien rested his hand against his chin, his eyes narrowing as he swept his eyes over the glowing words.
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Lucien: Hello, 502.
502: …
There was no change in the lines, Lucien's face remains expressionless and didn’t look discouraged.
Lucien: We're here with the person that you' re waiting for, and I think we all should have space and room to talk together.
502: …
As soon as Lucien spoke, the lines began to move with a certain pattern.
It was the same as I remembered, but it didn't take the shape of the "figure" I had seen, as if judging or examining.
502: Baby, are they your friends?
Lucien: Of course.
Although Lucien said so, the lighthouse didn’t respond to him, just quietly waiting, probably waiting for my answer.
I looked at the figure below, pulled my head back, leaned against the wall in thought, and opened my mouth softly.
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MC: The one standing at the very back, wearing white and saying hello to you is. The rest are not.
502: Okay, baby.
The people down below evidently didn't hear my reply, and Lucien cautiously swept over the rapidly surging golden light on the wall, his demeanour still calm.
Lucien: It seems you already have an answer, and hopefully it will be something we can both agree on.
502: Let's hope so, clever outsider.
As soon as the words were spoken, I felt the wall that I was leaning on and the stairs below slowly begin to vibrate, with sand and dust slowly dropping from above my head.
The whole place shook and reconstructed itself. The dust made MC closed her eyes and coughed. When she opened her eyes, she saw Lucien using his barrier to shield away all the dust.
I slowly opened my eyes, the dust in the air made me cough, so I waved my hand to lift the dust in front of me.
A transparent barrier was shielding away all the dust.
??(Lucien): …
There was a soft inhalation in my ears, I followed the sound and also froze in place.
This appears to be a reconstructed stone room, and…
Lucien that was standing right in front of me.
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The moment he saw me he also seemed to be caught in a brief moment of surprise, his eyes confined to my body, but he hesitated to speak.
I tried to open my mouth to say something, but with my lips opening and closing, I ended up not knowing what to say.
The pain and grief are still fresh in my mind, and those impulsive questions and harsh words will never be dismissed by either me or Lucien as if they had never happened.
And Lucien, who is so clever, surely knows that the person talking to 502 is me.
The footsteps moved over, Lucien approached me and squatted down, his slightly cold fingertips brushed my forehead, causing me to feel a momentary twinge of pain.
I subconsciously winced, and realized that my forehead had been injured at some point.
I was confused and tried to touch it with my hand, but he held it.
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Lucien: Don't touch it, it can get infected.
His voice was soft, like a falling leaf on the water, causing my heart to ripple.
It was just a simple sentence, but it made me want to cry.
Lucien: Your body is all bruised and wet. How did you get yourself into so much mess again…
A somewhat helpless sigh fell on my ears, and the raging tide that nearly drowned me just now seemed to remain inside me at the moment.
It screamed and want to burst out of my eyes.
I bit my lips hard, unable to say anything, and just shook my head gently.
I don't know what Lucien's expression is like now. He seems to just sigh and is just about to say something when the whole room is instantly lit up by a sudden surge of light.
The silhouette of shadows and sliding lines merged together, and the shadow appeared on the stone wall to my side and waved its "body" cheerfully.
502: How's that, my baby? Now that you and your friend are safe, am I much more awesome than 19?
I felt the palm holding my wrist tighten for a moment. I stole a glance to see Lucien's sharp jawline, and a slightly tense and wary expression on his face.
He looked at the wall and let out a soft, slow, and slightly sneering laugh.
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Lucien: “Baby”?
Then, the pair of cold eyes turned to my face, a smiling but cold expression, and slowly let go of my hand.
Lucien: “Friend”?
[Chapter 24-5]
The air seemed to stand still.
I looked Lucien right in the eye as he gazed at me, and all kinds of words rushed to my heart.
My heart, which wanted to rely on him, to be close to him, to confide in him all my grievances and fears, kept beating.
I used all my strength but could only stand still to suppress all my impulses.
Not now.
After taking a deep breath, I tried to put away those complicated and fluctuating emotions, stroking the dust that had fallen on my face, and raised a smile.
MC: Hello, Professor Lucien.
Lucien closed his eyes slightly as he heard me, and those cold eyes blinked slowly, I don't know what he was thinking.
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Lucien: I thought… we were enemies?
He looked down at me and said each word especially gently, yet with an imposing and oppressive tone.
Just before I answered, the shadow of 502 wavered and instantly stuck over.
502: Enemy?
Not good.
The electrical current beeped without any warmth, as if it was the only verdict after hitting the enter key.
I instantly took a step forward and, regardless of my completely soaked clothes, grabbed Lucien's arm very "affectionately" and pinched him on the inside of his arm.
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MC: He's joking. 502, you won't get it. But friends like to joke with each other! Haha!
My face was full of smiles as I looked at the shadow that was close by, my heart hovered.
Although 19 did not show any malice towards me, and 502 just saved me and solved the crisis for me.
They are still something left behind by a mysterious civilization, perhaps also related to the starlight that brings radiation from the sky, and I can't let my guard down.
More importantly, I don't want anything to happen to Lucien while he's here either.
MC: Lucien, I don't think you need to say more.
I tugged on Lucien's arm and pulled it down, standing on my tiptoes to reach his ear.
MC: None of us knows what will happen here, and although that 502 is very kind to me, it is still unknown.
MC: It's safer for us to be friends here, Professor Lucien is clever, so he should understand this.
Lucien just turned sideways, his eyes lifted from my clenched fingers to my face, and his Adam's apple sliding a little.
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Lucien: It seems that it doesn't quite understand human jokes.
Lucien raised the corners of his mouth, did not break my "restraint" and looked at the wriggling line.
MC: Y-Yes!
502: It is great if it's just a misunderstanding!
It seemed happy; the surging golden light looked like flower petals flying in the sun. The twisted lines circled the stone wall several times and finally made their way to my side.
502: But baby, I thought you'd pay us a visit as soon as you got away from 19! I've been waiting for you for a long time!
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MC: …because a lot has happened.
I was a little overwhelmed by the somewhat enthusiastic residual intelligence in front of me, and Lucien stood by without saying anything, seemingly still surmising all this.
MC: You don’t have to call me ‘baby’…
502: But my data tells me that this is what you guys are saying to express affection, I don't want you to be afraid!
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Lucien: If we want to express affection, we usually use 'comrade'.
Lucien's voice softly rang yet it was like a sharp blade pinning the lines that kept on surging.
Lucien: The term 'baby' tends to sound harsh and insulting to the ear.
502: Is that so?!
Lucien: Yes, it appears that your machine is a bit old and seems to be providing you with the wrong data.
I quietly looked over at Lucien, his face was full of sincerity and his voice sounded honest and kind.
Seeing his serious look, I almost laughed at the rare sight, but looked at the lines that were flustered and warped because of Lucien’s ‘correction’ I decided that it was better to keep quiet.
Finally, the shadow stood in front of me again.
502: Your friend is so great. I'm really sorry about what just happened, comrade.
MC: …
I felt a soft chuckle coming from overhead, hiding a few hints of smugness and triumph.
It's just such a small moment, but it made me a bit dazed.
MC: It's okay, uh… comrade 502.
502: How kind of you to accept my apology!
It seemed to be about to say something, but there was a rumbling sound nearby, as if it was hitting the stone wall with some force.
502: Let's go, I'll take you somewhere else first.
Hearing 502 say so, I thought of the scene 19 took me to see before, thought for a moment and followed.
Unexpectedly, the person whose arm I was holding stood still, making me stop in my tracks as well.
Lucien's gaze lifted from my soaked shoes, passing over scuffed pants, bruises on my arms, tight-fitting clothes, and finally landing on the cut on my forehead.
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Lucien: This path is not the only option. You can choose to leave, and I can help you.
I froze for a moment, his gaze looked a little complicated, and yet there was a rare frankness.
The damp clothing made me uncomfortable, and the pain that I had ignored earlier because of the nervousness slowly came through.
Lucien turned his arm over, with his palm up.
I examined his palm, I wonder when the coldness from the first time I saw it was dispersed, and now was covered with a faint warmth.
In a flash, some distant scenes came to mind.
I didn't shake it, I just spread both of my hands.
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MC: Lucien, the left hand is for you to stay and be friends with me, and the right hand is for you to get out of here first.
MC: Which one do you choose?
His eyes widened slightly and turned narrow.
He reached forward with his palm and took my left hand in his.
[Chapter 24-6]
The swaying shadows walk down the narrow passageway, and the entire corridor seems crowded because of the reconstruction of the structure.
The grains of dust that occasionally fall down are a constant reminder of the somewhat crumbling building.
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Lucien: I thought you would recognize it.
His voice was soft, and his close breath puffed lightly on my ear.
MC: I've only been in one other lighthouse, with a different number and character, so I can't make a generalization.
Lucien: A careful choice.
Lucien glanced at the shifting shadows walking in front of him, curiosity gradually diffused his eyes, and he seemed to even breathe a little lighter.
He seemed to want to ask something, but his slightly opened lips ended up pursed together, as if stifled by something.
Somehow, it was as if I could guess what he wanted to ask.
MC: If it's anything like the lighthouse I've been in before, it's actually a residual intelligence.
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Lucien's slightly astonished pupils were more surprised by the fact that I had opened my mouth than by what I had said.
MC: Although I don't quite understand this residual intelligence, it should be like some kind of data? The last lighthouse was numbered 19, and it said it came from a previous civilization, before our world came.
Lucien: Residual intelligence, lighthouse, last civilization. No matter which term, that sounds like a lot of information.
MC: …Indeed. 19 says that they are not the first and will not be the last civilization to disappear in this world. Lucien, do you know what this means?
Lucien: I wish there was a deeper meaning to that statement. If it only had a surface meaning, it might have erased all judgment in the moment.
His face became a little serious, as if covered with a thick layer of night.
I remembered the world where the dawn was always absent when the comets came, and my heart seemed to be slowly tightened.
The world is constantly experiencing trials and tribulations, like a cruel and malicious curse, as if only endless darkness is the only end and answer.
Lucien: So, you came here like this, after all the difficulties, in pursuit of answers?
Lucien's words interrupted my thoughts and I could hear the implication in his tone, but if I told him I was almost killed and fell into the ocean…
I feel that it will destroy the rare and stable atmosphere of the moment.
MC: … Because of some reason, I guess.
Lucien: …Some reason?
MC: Well, …for some reasons.
My gaze shifted to the side, but I knew Lucien's eyes had been resting on my back.
I just turned my head to the side and walked forward without looking at him.
I don't know how long we followed 502, the path twisted and turned, and finally after stepping over a rocky staircase, the whole view opened up.
This appears to be a larger space with flatter walls and floor.
502: Welcome, two comrades, to our cockpit!
MC: Cockpit…?
In that cheerful tone, I looked around the walls, but did not feel anything related to the "cockpit".
Did it also turn into ashes under the erosion of time, like what 19 showed us before?
502 seemed to catch surprise, the shadow raised a line from the left side, like an arm to display something
With the raised arm, all the lines in the entire stone wall lit up, and the lines of light converged as they did on that real stage.
Numerous lights scanning the air from top to bottom, faintly revealing the metallic and technological walls.
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The intricate console, the bright blue-white screen floating in the air, resembles a futuristic cockpit.
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Lucien: Is this… a projection?
Lucien's fingertips touched the walls, delicately caressing the lines of the constructions.
MC: Is it not real? When I first saw it, I thought for a split second that it was all real.
I came to his side and followed to touch it, once again amazed at this precise and amazing performance.
Lucien narrowed his eyes and stood up to look at the shadow.
Lucien: It doesn't seem to be a technology that would be available in this era.
502: Is that so? It seems like we're way more developed than you guys. How can people in this era not be able to do such things?
It looked a little smug, but somehow, I felt a certain anxiety and disbelief.
MC: 502, when I met 19, it told me a lot… about your civilization.
502: I know, we have a shared terminal.
It stands in the center of the entire cockpit, like an officer ready to take off with the ship.
It was just a line completely devoid of any emotion, and somehow, I felt as if it was looking through the simulated cockpit glass, into the distant sky.
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Lucien: Could this be your Noah's Ark?
502: Well… how can I put it? To be precise, it should just be our fantasy.
It hooked up its lines, like two hands folded together, and somehow, I always felt it was more like a human than 19.
502: Before we disappear, we confirm the possibility that there were once numerous civilizations that also existed. The world can never completely eliminate everything, and it doesn't seem to want to hide everything so badly. Sometimes it's more like it's deliberately telling us that something is out there. It seems like…
Its lines poked through and came up against us, obviously only a shadow, yet it was full of oppressiveness.
502: It’s leaving beacons of light just for you.
MC: But 19 says that the lighthouses are just traces of the struggle you are trying to leave behind...
502: That's why I said that grandfather was stupid.
He slowly wiggled the lines as if a man was tsking his tongue and wiggling his fingertips.
502: This is what the world has chosen to leave behind, and even if tens of thousands or hundreds of millions of years pass, I still believe so strongly.
Lucien's gaze flashed a subtle light and he took a step forward, almost passing through the shadow.
Lucien: Were you… once a 'human' as well?
[Chapter 24-8]
I looked over at Lucien in shock as he stretched his hands and gently asked a question that was extremely difficult to understand.
MC: Lucien, is it supposed to be a residual intelligent-?
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Lucien: Perhaps, sufficiently advanced and developed technology could enable such sophisticated intelligent analysis, but I don't think it would be enough to cross the destruction and birth of a civilization.
Lucien: 502, you and 19 exist in this world now as data. But is this true in your world as well?
Rather than asking a question, Lucien simply put his thought process into words, frowning lightly.
502 was somewhat silent and surprisingly laughed at the end. The shadow crossed Lucien and fled to my back, with some kind of line reached out and touched my shoulder.
502: As expected of your friend, it's impressive!
I didn't feel any malice from that light electronic sound, more like pride and complacency.
502: That's right, we were all human before we became lighthouses!
Lucien: Has your brain science developed so powerfully?
502: Hmph, that's for sure, although it has absolutely nothing to do with me!
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Lucien: Did you directly use brain waves... no, should the entire brain be used in this technology?
Lucien was answered by the various obscure icons and data that lit up on the screens throughout the cockpit.
The unknown characters kept pulsating, and they probably crossed countless failed checks and retakes, before finally converging into the shape of a brain in a tiny machine.
I froze in place, my brain was a little sluggish for a moment, a certain harsh and painful speculation hanging over my mouth, but I could not bear to say it.
Lucien: You guys turned your brains into this machine directly before you died, didn't you? This lighthouse kept your brains and consciousness behind, allowing you to 'live' until now.
502: The right answer! How about that, we're awesome, right! Although our civilization annihilated and disappeared from this world, we're pretty impressive! More powerful than you guys!
I subconsciously inhaled lightly, these people who left their consciousness… were always locked up in one of these hidden lighthouses.
Always resting here since tens of thousands of years ago in the past.
MC: Then, 19 is also…
502: That dead-brained old grandpa was cute, wasn't he! I can still remember how he used to listen to songs while strolling through the corridors of the institute every day.
It sounded a little nostalgic, it was a memory that belonged to it, not to this mission, and made my heart tremble lightly.
MC: So, you too…
502: Me? Hello, dear comrade~ I am the youngest genius researcher of the Lighthouse Project Team, I’m only 21 years old!
It smugly shook its head, proud and boastful, as if it were glowing.
I felt like my whole body was nailed to the ground, shocked and bewildered, not knowing what to use to be able to express my feelings and… sadness.
This 21-year-old, no, not just this teenager, but the old man, and all those other people in the lighthouse that I have yet to reach.
How do they spend these long, dark nights?
And how they endure these endless silences, quietly waiting for answers that may never come.
What are they in it for?
Blinking blankly, I passed over the shadow of 502 and I saw Lucien standing there, a light shining in his eyes.
In an instant, I knew the answer.
In that world, there is no calculation, no matter the price, no fear of sacrifice.
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Lucien: 502, it's nice to meet you.
Lucien didn't say anything, just slightly bowed his head.
502: I'm also very happy to meet you guys, especially you.
MC: Why me?
502: Because you are special, and we have been waiting for you. This lighthouse project was born for you.
I frowned, in confusion and disbelief.
MC: I don't understand…
I don't know why I was able to open the stone slab to get here, why these people across time would choose me.
Is it because I am the QUEEN of the past? Or am I the only one who has come back in this world with memories and time?
A voice just broke in before 502's answer.
??: Because you are CORE
[Chapter 24-9]
The silver light is like a sneaky signal, and from the first time it was introduced into the hunter's game, all that accompanied it was danger.
The teenager stepped forward first, and Joker's face peeked through the other side of the light curtain as he gazed at 502's shadow with a deadly stare.
Immediately afterwards, he moved his eyes away in fascination, absorbed in the cockpit projected on the stone wall.
The projection light fell in his eyes, constantly flowing and shimmering.
Looking at this kind of Joker, I couldn't help but take a few steps back.
This man was so dangerous and bizarre that I had no idea what he was up to or what he would do next.
And Lucien… my eyes peeked over the white figure, he appeared with Joker, will he help me? Or will he…
I don't want to think about it anymore, it would only complicate everything.
Whether Lucien will help me or not, I have to figure it out on my own first, I can't just rely on him-
I had to walk up to him on my own and prove myself strong enough to be his strength.
MC: What are you talking about? CORE? I think you got the wrong person.
Lucien proved experimentally that I had nothing to do with CORE, that was the answer he gave me and that was what he wanted me to believe in NW.
Based on this answer, it must be some factor unknown to Joker that influences the opening of the lighthouse.
Whether this answer is true or not is a question that Lucien and I will have to work out later.
And in the presence of Joker, I was not going to show any little doubt about what Lucien had proved, and perhaps this doubt would have some fatal consequences in the future.
I stood up straight and watched as Joker's eyes moved reluctantly to my face.
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Joker: The opening of the lighthouse requires the use of a large amount of Evol energy fluctuations, and you are no longer carrying Evol.
Joker: …How do you think you got in? If I’m thinking correctly, you and we came in with a completely different entrance.
I froze for a moment, wondering how Joker knew about my loss of Evol.
Apparently, this matter surprised Lucien a bit as well, and I felt a slightly deeper glance rest on me.
Joker: The lighthouse only responds to you.
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Lucien: But that doesn't mean she is CORE.
The strong words interjected, clear and calm, but wrapped in an imposing manner that could not be refuted.
Lucien: This girl is not a CORE, that is the conclusion of the experiment.
Lucien withdrew his gaze and took two steps forward, subtly positioned himself in front of me.
Joker: That doesn't matter, to me CORE is just one of the keys. As long as she can open the lighthouse, she's special.
502: CORE? I know what it is, so that's what you call it now!
Lucien: Now is not the time for you to talk.
Lucien’s eyes did not move, and the cold fluorescent light made the entire person cold and sharp.
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Joker: Professor Lucien, I thought the duration of our cooperation could have been longer.
Joker: I don't understand why you're standing across from me when we haven't gotten any of the answers we wanted.
Joker: Isn't that the case?
I looked at the half-covered side of Lucien's face, and without blinking an eye, a slow, disdainful smile rose on his face.
Joker: Professor Lucien, don't you want to see the truth of the world as it opens up to us?
I froze for a moment, not expecting Joker to ask this question.
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Lucien: I don't need it to be opened to me.
Lucien raised his face ever so slightly, looking arrogant and ruthless.
It was an extremely powerful and stubborn force, like a raging wave in a thunderstorm, rolled in his indifferent eyes.
Lucien: I will find it.
Those eyes stunned me in place, making me hold my breath for a moment.
In this moment I felt so weak and it had nothing to do with strength.
Rather, it is my heart, which is so weak.
It is always hesitating, constantly wandering, incessantly only saying beautiful words, and continuously sailing on the sea without direction.
Always know where the final destination is, but can't even find the route.
I took a step forward and stood next to Lucien, staring at Joker.
He didn't know what I was going to do, but he probably didn't care.
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MC: Stop moving forward, Joker.
Teenager: Who are you ordering around!
I ignored the teenager and just looked at Joker with a deadly grasp on my hand.
What makes a powerful person? And how does a person become powerful, powerful enough to protect themselves and the people they want to protect?
MC: Lucien, do you need to continue your cooperation with Joker?
Lucien's gaze was cast with a slightly deeper interest in his eyes.
Lucien: What if I say I need it?
MC: Then I can surrender for now, after all, there is no way for me to deal with you two, and I can think of other ways later.
As I replied, the corners of Lucien's mouth slowly rose.
A silver line suddenly lit up beneath my feet, just moments before I nearly fell, a transparent barrier stood between me and the silver light surface –
(T/N: !!Lucien copied Yi’s transportation evol, you can read more about it on this R&S )
I stood in the middle of the barrier and saw Lucien's answer.
Lucien: Unfortunately, this cooperation may require some consideration.
MC: Then, please help me out for a while.
Lucien stepped away and stood behind me, a clenched fist extended on each side of my body.
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Lucien: The left side is to leave; the right side is to struggle. No matter what you choose, no one will blame you.
I looked at his hands and grabbed his right hand.
I don't want to run away yet, I want to struggle a little more.
Ice crystals fell on my palm and they condensed together into a tiny gun, glowing with a faint coldness –
Almost identical to the tranquilizer pistol I commonly use.
I raised that gun and pointed it at Joker, feeling a surge of courage raging through my entire body.
Joker: Do you think that will work?
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Lucien: She probably has a friend as well.
Countless ice crystals gathered in Lucien's palm; the frost covered the entire perimeter of the wall in an instant.
The icicles hanging in the air emitted a scintillating cold light, refracted in the eyes of their owners, which could not hide their coldness and wrath.
Teenager: You…
Before he could speak, with a lift of Lucien's fingertips, a hard block of ice chained the teenager instantly to the side of the ice wall.
The moment the silver light appeared, another side of the more rigid and massive ice plate has waited for the silver light to shine again.
At the same time, the previously hanging icicles has been placed in front of Joker, bursting with an aggressive force.
Joker didn't frown, he didn't even look at the teenager, but simply raised his hand and with a wave, those icicles in front of him dissipated like smoke.
Joker: Useless…
In the next second, a sharp and tiny ice blade cut through the side of Joker's face, leaving a small blood mark on the always unperturbed face.
I held up the ice gun, my palms were already numb from the cold, but my heart surged with a feeling I had never felt before.
MC: Your opponent is not just one person.
[Chapter 24-11]
Joker's hand slowly rubbed his face for a moment, his overall expression unperturbed, but there was some puzzlement.
However, the raging icicles were not going to give him any chance to catch his breath and kept coming at him.
Lucien is aware that these icicles can't really hurt Joker, so his attacks are geared more towards blocking his path of movement.
No one refused to give up, as if it would never end.
I knew I needed a gap at this point, a gap that would be big enough to grab Joker's attention.
I ran, raised my ice gun, and shot at Joker.
MC: Joker! There were many civilizations before this one!
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Joker: …!
He froze, his gaze turned to me, and there seemed to be countless questions in his eyes, but the next instant a thin icicle went through his shoulder.
Joker still didn't frown, raising his hand to resist the ice picks that kept stabbing over.
Finally, he became a little impatient, and with a single swing of his figure, he instantly appeared in front of Lucien.
The ice barrier that appeared in a flash was broken by Joker's slap, and the shattered ice shards cut across Lucien's face.
MC: I have also seen a backwards world!
That moment of pause was enough for Lucien.
A huge ice hammer swung from the side and sent Joker's figure flying into the wall.
(T/N: istg he could make any kind of weapons from his ice evol)
Teenager: Joker!!
In response he was hit by a silver metal instrument, and suddenly Lucien appeared in front of him and snapped it around his neck.
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Lucien: Much like the collars in your hunter games, right?
Teenager: You…!
His body was encased in ice against the wall, clenching his fists but seemingly unable to exert any strength.
Teenager: Why can't I use Evol…
Lucien: You mean this ability?
Lucien waved his fingertips and a familiar silver arc appeared behind the teenager.
In the midst of the teenager's frightened and frantic gaze, Lucien's fingers gently pressed against him, pushing him into the darkness.
With the sound of crisp ice crystals hitting the ground, Joker got up from the shattered ice with a bloodstained body, he glanced over the location where the teenager had just disappeared and looked indifferent.
Joker: Professor Lucien, you took my tools while they were in my hand.
Lucien: You are indeed an excellent explorer. Unfortunately, you see too little in your eyes that you are able to be influenced by her.
Joker did not speak, he trembled and took a step forward, silver light appeared under his feet.
He just glanced at it and then turned his head to look up at Lucien.
Joker: Professor Lucien, this is not the end by any means.
Joker's body slowly disappears in the light, his eyes are not even half disappointed, faintly turned his head, looked at me, and then looked at the simulated cockpit display.
Joker: Who are you really?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Long after Joker's figure disappeared, neither Lucien nor I moved.
The frost slowly faded throughout the entire room and I slowly slid to sit on the floor.
My fingers seemed to be tensely locked into the posture of holding the ice gun because of the extra force.
I made a little effort to lift my fingers, and breathed heavily into the air because of the momentary relaxation.
Suddenly, a pair of equally cold fingers covered it, he gently spread my fingers and held onto my hand little by little.
The faint warmth passed between these two hands to each other, as if it was the only warmth among the entire frost.
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Lucien: MC, when did your Evol disappear?
Lucien softly asks, we solved Joker, but there are too many things that are still unresolved.
A problem that belongs to only the two of us.
MC: Is it okay for you to have a conflict with Joker like this?
I kept my head down and didn't answer his question, just looked at our clasped palms.
Lucien: What brought you to this lighthouse?
MC: Joker said I was CORE, is he telling the truth?
It was as if we were having a conversation, yet it was as if we weren't.
The secrets are like a thin barrier, which makes people different and distant.
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Lucien: From the beginning to the end, I don't want to make decisions for you.
Lucien: The choice is always yours, no matter when.
As though there was a silent soft sigh, those cold fingers slowly lifted, only to be held by my hand in the opposite direction.
MC: Lucien, are you afraid?
I looked up, and Lucien narrowed his eyes just slightly when he heard it.
Lucien: What am I afraid of?
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MC: Afraid of losing your control over something, like…
MC: …yourself.
Under my palm, those cold fingers trembled slightly and imperceptibly.
MC: I came to this lighthouse by accident, as you can see, in a sort of messy way.
MC: Lucien, I can answer all the questions you want to know. Because you are Lucien, I can tell you anything.
MC: But will you be as honest with me?
I thought I would have a hard time saying these words, but unexpectedly, it was easier than I thought.
I was used to him reaching out to me and took it for granted that he had to be as unreserved as I was.
But I had vaguely overlooked the fact that in this restarting world, our relationship was also being re-established.
Perhaps I was too eager and greedy.
MC: I am greedy, because I want you to trust me in exactly the same way that I trust you.
MC: I have a 'Lucien' in my heart who will talk to me about anything, whether I will be helpful to his plans or not.
MC: Whether… I'm involved in every piece of what he has to deal with or not.
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Lucien's expression tightened a bit, he just pursed his lips and eventually said nothing, his Adam’s apple slid a little.
MC: So, I feel sad when you aren't like that.
MC: Maybe I should be apologizing to you, because I was just framing you the way I wanted to be framed. But it hurts too much for me.
I grabbed those hands as if I had some kind of courage.
Running away will not solve the problem. If I want to walk towards him, I have to express my heart in its entirety.
MC: If, at the time, you had been willing to tell me why, I wouldn't have hurt so much. But you didn't.
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Lucien: Because I didn't think that you were strong enough to protect yourself.
Lucien finally opened his mouth slowly, as if it were an order, and spat out those few words.
Lucien: You're right. To some extent, I didn't trust you enough. At least under that circumstance, I don't think you could have made the absolutely right move if I had been honest and told you the original story.
Lucien: It was a way to both protect yourself and not compromise my plans.
MC: …
Although I could probably have guessed that answer, it still sounded a little hard to listen at this moment.
(T/N: The POV switched to Lucien’s until the end of this part)
Lucien: Because you would suddenly appear in my mind, in all the inexplicable images.
MC: …?
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Lucien: Because from the second time you appeared in front of me, you’ve said something different from the ordinary people.
Lucien: Because of the backwards world in your dreams.
Lucien: Because you always manage to act and behave in ways that are beyond my expectations.
Yet I take them all for granted.
Because my heart always aches when I meet you.
Because all my will is breaking out of my control, screaming for me to come closer to you, to walk beside you.
This girl has unspeakable secrets and is carrying a huge pressure that she is not familiar with.
Her death opened the door, which had never been opened, for a moment.
She's too dangerous.
So, he couldn't trust her, even if it was sort of a betrayal of some instinct.
MC: That’s it huh…
He heard the girl softly sigh in such a way, trying hard to hide her sadness, but soon, she raised a stronger smile.
MC: I'm happy to hear your sincere words. Lucien, when you doubted someone before, would you tell them so directly?
He froze for a moment, not knowing what to answer for a second.
MC: Thank you, Lucien. I know what to do next.
Lucien: What are you going to do?
He saw the girl slowly stand up, but still holding his hand.
MC: It's okay, just go ahead and doubt me.
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MC: Lucien, as your 'enemy', let me secretly whisper a secret to you.
MC: I know many, many secrets about the world that you don’t know.
The simulated screen of the cockpit that reflected the sea draped behind the girl, the faint light falling in fragments behind her, as if illuminating everything together.
MC: If you don't want to be surpassed by me and find the answer faster, then come to me.
MC: I give you this right as a reason for you to seek me out.
Inconceivably, he seemed to see a thin thread, firmly tied around their wrists.
It's called involvement.
Not letting him to hide, and let them have countless encounters in the future.
Next part-> [Here]
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uriekukistan · 2 months
Note
Omg u cooked with ch 5!! Megumi laying his head on Yuuji’s shoulder and falling asleep?? The heart in the contact name??? Shoot me rn. Your fic makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and smiling like an idiot and kicking my feet giggling. God did I feel Megumi’s frustration in the beginning thoughhh.. poor guy. But congratulations to him for sugar plum Prince! And wishing Maki some good luck with snow bc ehrm… (definitely not been personally victimised by that fake snow 🥲). I am so intrigued by Megumi’s Prince Siegfried portrayal though… I keep thinking of the act 3 black swan pas de deux, would he be a more sceptical Siegfried over an oblivious happy one? I wish I could see it irl 😭 also you’ve rlly tempted me to book tickets for Swan lake, they’ve got Vadim Mutagirov with Fumi Kaneko in two weeks ahhh!! Also did you have a specific video in mind for the one Yuuji sent to Megumi? I really loved the last video you linked. I don’t usually look at boy groups so I didn’t know abt him before but omg Dino is sooooo goood?? And apologies ahead bc idk anythign about hip hop but like he’s so light yet clean with his movements?? Like he moves so easy, how??
Looking forward to next chapter!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️
apologies in advance, but im abt to ramble so much thank you for the lovely response <33333
STOP ACTUALLY I WOULD DIE TO SEE VADIM MUNTAGIROV AND FUMI KANEKO IN SWAN LAKE IN PERSON ????? TWO MY FAV DANCERS FROM ROYAL BALLET IN MY FAV BALLET ????? U SHOULD TOTALLY GO IF U CAN OMG PLS LIVE IT FOR ME i loveee fumi kaneko her port de bras are always so beautiful and elegant and expressive, and she was amazing as aurora too
anyway excuse me for fangirling jlgsfdh thank you so much!!! im so glad you've been enjoying so far :)))) and yes everyone pray for maki, snow AND flowers is a crazy hard combo but she's crazy good so she's got this down (this made me realize i've never done snow, i've almost always done arabian until recently i've been drosselmeyer which has been so fun????). i definitely see megumi as a more skeptical siegfried in the black swan pas. actually it comes up more later, but he doesn't really do well with the lovesick & happy type vibe lmao (we saw it coming tbh), so a skeptical and overall more melancholy siegfried suits him well.
the choreo i was thinking of in this chapter was this bury a friend choreo by woomin jang and woonha. i absolutely love woonha like she fuses so many elements of contemporary dance with hip hop (such as here), and overall has such unique choreos. like this one, i had genuinely never seen anything like it before, and still havent seen anything like it, or at least not as well executed. so i think she'd be a good inspiration for megumi, just to see how many directions hip hop can go beyond the sort of singular idea that he has.
and omg yes i lovveeee dino he's amazing. honestly im not super into kpop anymore but i'll always have major respect for him (and the rest of seventeen's dance line, actually started in hip hop bc of them). he's really mastered that balance between grounded and being light, crazy strength, crazy control....yeah
okay i'll stop now 😭 thank you again so much fr tho :D
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writemywaytoyourheart · 10 months
Note
Oh my fcking god
I just finished ch 13 and i feel like ive been through the 5 stages of grief 10x with ZERO breaks in between💀 if ch 12 was torture then this chapter was HELL on earth 😭😭 i think i need to recover before i can give a fully comprehensable response of the heartbreak ive just read.
One thing i will say is that i loved the absolute irony when jk talked about the fate of the "human boy", not knowing he was indirectly talking about himself 💀 im both dreading and longing for when he gains his memories back . I just know after he does i wont be the same person again. Also!! Jk being really affected by y/n suffering esp in the scene where she suffered through all the diseases :(( it was like he was feeling what she was feeling
(Btw!! You write angst and dialogue so well)
I'll be waiting patiently for the next part since you served us so damn well with this chapter 🤲😭
Um first of all THANK YOU 😭💖 I literally love long asks I love them. GIMME THAT SHYYYYT
Second of all, I am so sorry 🙇‍♀️ although that is quite the compliment heh heh 😌
I LOVE DIALOGUE 😍 IT'S MY FAV SO TYSM FOR SAYING THAY
Girl he fr trippin 😭 jealous ah heated mf for WHAT 😭 the 8th circle tho 🥺🥺 tough to write fr
Agh thank youuuuuu, I hope you can heal and be ready to be slain by the next chapter 💃
ILY 💚
-chip
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Text
Wed[nesday] 15 May 1833
8 5/..
11 3/4
P
L
rain for ab[ou]t an h[ou]r till 9 - found very gentle signs of my cousin an hour preparing
two napkins etc  put one on between three and four in the afternoon F[ahrenheit] 56° at 10 1/4 at w[hi]ch h[ou]r br[eak]f[a]st -
skim[me]d ov[e]r the courier - dawd[le]d away the morn[in]g as us[ua]l - saunt[ere]d out a lit[tle] ab[ou]t 1 alone and read[in]g a few of Volt[aire]s let[ter]s vol[ume] 2
Eliz[abe]th Dalton left us ab[ou]t 2 - so[me]ti[me] d[o]wnst[ai]rs and th[e]n w[i]th IN- [Isabella Norcliffe] in h[e]r r[oo]m and th[e]n co[me] to my own
bef[ore] 4, and wr[ote] out Mon[day] yest[erday] and so far of today till 4 1/2 - the parc[e]l arriv[e]d th[i]s morn[in]g fr[om] Shibd[e]n
forward[e]d fr[om] Edin[burgh] - sm[all] pap[e]r box cont[ainin]g 2 p[ai]r woollen kneecaps and 1 p[ai]r d[itt]o socks fr[om] Miss
Walker (knitt[e]d for me by her) and no[te] fr[om] h[e]r dat[e]d ‘Udale 2 Ap[ril] 24th 1833’ - she seems no better
in mind and surely there neither is nor perhaps out to be any prospect of our being toge
ther tho’ I shall of course expect some answer to my letter to her this day week from York -
Miss W- [Walker] begs to hear fr[om] me bef[ore] my leav[in]g Eng[lan]d ‘when do you leave Eng[lan]d? where are you go[in]g fr[om]
‘Paris? w[i]th wh[o]m do you cross the channel? - I can[no]t tell you an[y]th[in]g really fav[oura]ble of my own mind,
‘I am gett[in]g qui[te] stout, b[u]t I feel th[a]t I am n[o]t improv[in]g in health of mind, and evils seem to increase up[on]
‘me, I ha[ve] n[o]t yet been ab[le] to form one resolut[io]n as to my ret[ur]n ho[me] tho’ my a[un]t says she wishes it
but I dread the idea of returning to greater evil  all your predictions  or I ought to say your warnings
appear to have been realized in me and I get deeper in the mire every day if you saw me now I am sure you
would say I was changed and you would observe it with regret and I begin to fear that my hopes of meeting
you again renewed in heart and body to which I have hitherto faintly clung will never be fulfilled
my sister and Captain Sutherland beg me to say everything that is kind from them with their very kinds regards  accept all that friendship can
offer from myself  pray let me hear from you for I shall not forget you and whatever befalls
me you will hear of either from myself or your aunt  thro’ her at least I can gain intelligence
of you ever believe me yours faithfully and affectionately Ann Walker - dress[e]d - din[ner] at 5 1/4
made notes fr[om] Norc[liffe]s’ tour - upst[ai]rs at 10 50/.. - F[ahrenheit] 67° at 11 3/4 p.m. - an h[ou]r’s r[ai]n till 9 a.m. th[e]n fine
till ev[enin]g - rainy, windy night -
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louvelylouis · 3 years
Note
hi so i know im sending too many asks and i swear this is gonna be the last one today, you can take ur time answering them :D
i just finished the tenjiku arc :)))) i am not okay :)))))
first of all - izana?? and kakuchan??? see, i knew toman would win but im sobbing pls izana's death was so sad T-T and kakuchan??? he was with him till the end and it was snowing and they held hands. and then kakuchan went and visited all the places they played together im sobbing pls 😭😭😭
and SECOND of all oh my god kisaki fr what even is he- if he's not a time leaper, he just heard takemichi go on about time leaping and was like "oh ok this checks out. doesnt change my plans tho haha die" like. ????? where did he even get that gun from?? he's a fricking middle schooler- and he's just. gone now?? so,,, anticlimatic?? mean girls edition???
(also. damn i kinda knew he liked hina cause u told me but still wtf he didn't even know hina was into delinquents, takemichi just wanted to become one so he too?? became one?? wtf shit motives are those dude get a life)
(also damn angry really took out 50 guys with a broken hand and foot i love him sm)
!!!! and then mikey saying "you created the new era" to takemichi!!!!!
lowkey, i thought he was gonna offer to have takemichi lead toman but he disbanded toman?
like. i get that that's the smartest thing to do but ik there's like a 100 more chapters left,,, where's the conflict gonna take place now?
(i do hope there's like some wholesome panels with them being kids without all the gang stuff)
and then mikey saying "i'll protect everyone here, so u dont have to worry" pls TT-TT
istg if takemichi goes back to the future and hina still dies i will riot nothing can go wrong now
(also ch 191 my beloved <333 we get chifuyu being wholesome and hinata and takemichi being cringe middleschoolers in love <3333)
well anyways, it's 11:15 on a school night i was supposed to be asleep but eh it's just revision tomorrow
hope u have a nice day too TT-TT
hii! u silly i told u it’s ok to send as many as u like (>︿< ) i look forward to them :))) i hope u had a good day at school :D
izana & kakuchan....yeah....these tragic duos really play with ur emotions right </3
lmao told ya none of these would’ve happened if kisaki knew how to handle a rejection 💀💀💀 i wouldnt call it love, it’s just obsessive behavior ://///
ANGRY GOING BERSERK MODE!!!!!!!!!! one of my fav moments istg 🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️
ah yes it felt kinda personal when mikey decided to disband toman, i was too into it all lmao. but yeah... maybe he wasnt wrong, like theyre gonna leave with good memories :(((((((
i tHiNk the real deal starts after then. if i remember right, next time takemichi travels back to future, everyone’s alive and happy so no hina doesnt die again sigh. but everything still goes wrong in one way.......... evil mikey go brrr 🙃
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decodingannelister · 3 years
Text
Saturday 9 January 1819
7 40/60
12
B[efore] B[reakfast] look[in]g ov[er] scraps of poet[r]y  etc. Read over my poetic epistle to Miss B that is θ. The rest of the morn[in]g try[in]g to clean a coup[le] pair wh[ite] kid shoes for Mariane and look[in]g ov[er] and arrang[in]g my things. My a[un]t h[a]d a let[ter] fr[om] Mary Swann (Micklegate, York) to announce the d[ea]th of h[e]r a[un]t Mrs Frances S[wann] at 8 a.m. on Thursday. At 3 1/4 d[o]wn the o[ld] b[ank] and past the woolshops to the lib[rar]y my fath[er] walk[e]d w[i]th me as f[a]r as the Talbot wh[e]n he w[e]nt to see Mr Mitchell.
R[ea]ding the new month[l]y mag[azine] for last month ‘On love. Oh! Love is like the cistus flow[e]r
1
Oh! Love is like the cistus flow[e]r
Wh[i]ch blossoms for a day;  
Oh! Love is like the summer’s show[e]r
Wh[i]ch sunbeams kiss away
2
     Tis but a sweet and thrilling dream                                              ‘
      Dispers[e]d by season’s pow[e]r
     ‘Tis but an evanescent gleam
      In youth’s enchanting hour
3
Yet,oh.’Tis all we have of bliss
A vision bright and dear
Warm as its own delicious kiss
But transient as its tear
4
Yet woe be those lonely hearts
Which feel its fire decay
The feath[e]ry flake the snow-cloud darts
Is scarce more cold than they
5        
The blighted hope, the ruined mind
The deep despairing sigh
Are all the traces left behind
By passions ecstasy.
Marg[are]t Torre (cop[ie]d at Elvington fr[om] Ellen’s M.S. Poetic ext[racts] and giv[e]n to her by author[e]ss Mrs Ja[me]s Torre  of Elton in h[e]r own, Mrs Torres, handwrit[in]g)
Callista came about four I rather in a comp limentary style I asked if she ever wrote poetry no never since she left school but she dared say I did I said never musing in my mind if she thought of my poetic epistle from her manner I shewed I should judge not her the above lines as the composition of a very nice woman very young and written soon after marriage she Miss B though the lady must  be unhappy but found fault with warm as its own delicious kiss and passions ecstasy saying they were fitter to come from a gentleman but indeed she knew nothing about it for she was ssure she had never been in love the verses were very much in moores sstyle she had popes read Eloisa to Abelard at Captain Alexander’s suggesting she does not seem as if shehad the heart to enter into sentiments of this ssort warmly after about half hourat the library during the rain walk[e]d past Clare Hall to Miss Markham’s on the Elland R[oa]dup the new r[oa]d back past Miss Watkinson’s and took a turn up and d[o]wn Horton St[ree]t told her when she did not hear a person not to say maam asked her not to cover her face so much with the cap under her bonnet and shewed her how to shake hands that is not to keep shaking or hold ones hand so long said I had to go to Pye Nest someday next week and we agreed I was to pass Westfield at half past eleven in the morning on Tuesday if fine if not Wednesday and she would watch for me she wonders why I like her so much I begin to wonder too for I fear she is sstupidish and has very little in her no warmth I fear I told her never to mention the observations I made to her as they were made for her alone she answered no I might be assured of that adding they often ask me at home what Miss Lister and I talk about I parted with her at five near Mr Abbots door where she was going to tea never did I feel so little satisfied with her tho when I told my wish about her cap she said she would alter it having before said her father and the rest often found fault with it but she never minded I thought as I came along well at all events I will never call on her what a sort of connection am I forming without anything to repay me I could almost see her tomorrow at the lecture and excuse myself on Tuesday I seem well inclined to think and care less about her in future I have seen a good deal of her lately and they say give a dog rope enough and he will hang himself w[e]nt al[on]g Southgate and up the n[ew] b[ank] and g[o]t home 10 min[ute]s bef[ore] 6 by our clock. In the ev[ening] r[ea]d the rev[iew] of Campbell’s Gertrude of Wyoming fav[ourabl]y, Poyes’s hist[ory] of Barbadoes tol[erabl]y, 2 vol[ume]s 8vo serm[on]s by Mr Sydney Smith rect[o]r of Foston, unfav[ourabl]y and Dr. Nathan Drake’s Essays on Periodic[a]l pap[er]s fav[ourabl]y in the 2[n]d vo[lume] of the Quar[terl]y Rev[iew] for May 1809. Notes fr[om]Cross-hills to ask us all to tea and cards next Fri[day] s[en]t our excuses. Last n[i]ght ver[y] stormy and rainy. The morn[in]g fair but it beg[a]n to r[ai]n a lit[tle] wh[e]n my fath[er] [and] I were at the top of the old bank and I h[a]d hard[l]y g[o]t to the lib[rar]y bef[ore] it rain[e]d tremend[ousl]y. Just fair bef[ore] I set off and beg[a]n to r[ai]n ag[ai]n on the flat. Like[l]y for anoth[er] stormy windy n[i]ght. B[arometer] 1 deg[ree] bel[ow] rainF[ahrenheit] 38 1/2 ° at 9p.m.
WYAS Reference Number:  SH:7/ML/E/2/0097/98
0 notes
whatdoesshedotothem · 3 years
Text
Wed[nesday] 15 .. May 1833
8 5/..
11 3/4
P
L
rain for ab[ou]t an h[ou]r till 9 - found very gentle signs of my cousin an hour preparing
two napkins etc  put one on between three and four in the afternoon F[ahrenheit] 56° at 10 1/4 at w[hi]ch h[ou]r br[eak]f[a]st -
skim[me]d ov[e]r the courier - dawd[le]d away the morn[in]g as us[ua]l - saunt[ere]d out a lit[tle] ab[ou]t 1 alone and read[in]g a few of Volt[aire]s let[ter]s vol[ume] 2
Eliz[abe]th Dalton left us ab[ou]t 2 - so[me]ti[me] d[o]wnst[ai]rs and th[e]n w[i]th IN- [Isabella Norcliffe] in h[e]r r[oo]m and th[e]n co[me] to my own
bef[ore] 4, and wr[ote] out Mon[day] yest[erday] and so far of today till 4 1/2 - the parc[e]l arriv[e]d th[i]s morn[in]g fr[om] Shibd[e]n
forward[e]d fr[om] Edin[burgh] - sm[all] pap[e]r box cont[ainin]g 2 p[ai]r woollen kneecaps and 1 p[ai]r d[itt]o socks fr[om] Miss
Walker (knitt[e]d for me by her) and no[te] fr[om] h[e]r dat[e]d ‘Udale 2 Ap[ril] 24th 1833’ - she seems no better
in mind and surely there neither is nor perhaps out to be any prospect of our being toge
ther tho’ I shall of course expect some answer to my letter to her this day week from York -
Miss W- [Walker] begs to hear fr[om] me bef[ore] my leav[in]g Eng[lan]d ‘when do you leave Eng[lan]d? where are you go[in]g fr[om]
‘Paris? w[i]th wh[o]m do you cross the channel? - I can[no]t tell you an[y]th[in]g really fav[oura]ble of my own mind,
‘I am gett[in]g qui[te] stout, b[u]t I feel th[a]t I am n[o]t improv[in]g in health of mind, and evils seem to increase up[on]
‘me, I ha[ve] n[o]t yet been ab[le] to form one resolut[io]n as to my ret[ur]n ho[me] tho’ my a[un]t says she wishes it
but I dread the idea of returning to greater evil all your predictions  or I ought to say your warnings
appear to have been realized in me and I get deeper in the mire every day if you saw me now I am sure you
would say I was changed and you would observe it with regret and I begin to fear that my hopes of meeting
you again renewed in heart and body to which I have hitherto faintly clung will never be fulfilled
my sister and Captain Sutherland beg me to say everything that is kind from them with their very kinds regards  accept all that friendship can
offer from myself  pray let me hear from you for I shall not forget you and whatever befalls
me you will hear of either from myself or your aunt  thro’ her at least I can gain intelligence
of you ever believe me yours faithfully and affectionately Ann Walker - dress[e]d - din[ner] at 5 1/4
made notes fr[om] Norc[liffe]s’ tour - upst[ai]rs at 10 50/.. - F[ahrenheit] 67° at 11 3/4 p.m. - an h[ou]r’s r[ai]n till 9 a.m. th[e]n fine
till ev[enin]g - rainy, windy night -
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