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#CANT BELIEVE THIS IS MY FIRST POST BACK IN CENTURIES IM SO SORRY GUYS
bioshook-wynand · 1 year
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Happy 4th of July, time to remember what it's about :)
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stuckylibrary · 4 years
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Group Ask 179
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Anon 1 said: (dubcon, maybe noncon?)
hi, do you know of a fic where post-ws, bucky comes in from the cold and finds steve, & they start a relationship. but towards the end it's revealed that (the big plot twist), bucky doesn't actually feel anything for steve and is only in the relationship because he thinks he has to be like steve's bucky from before the war/feels as though he has to play the role of bucky barnes and thinks that's what that entails/or similar icr exactly. steve, who thought bucky meant it, is really hurt. thankyou
Anon sent in Out of the Dead Land by orphan_account (complete | 62,707 | E)
opaline-pixie said:
Hello. I’m looking for a story that I read years back. All I remember about it was that Bucky liked being bound up. Steve took them to a cabin and instead of bondage tape he bought vet tape because it was cheaper. That and I remember a game where he blindfolded bound Bucky and surrounded him with sex toys and Bucky had to guess what they were.
Anon 2 said:
I read this fic a while back; I remember that the summary was part of a book that Bucky had written about the accident that lost him his arm (he had a Stark prosthetic, and was touchy about people liking it)? It was an AU where Bucky and Steve were both college professors, with Steve possibly an art teacher? I think Bucky and Steve didn't get on at first? There's a scene where Steve does a painting lesson for some of the professors, and a faculty event/party towards the end? Thank you!
Anon 3 said: (sex work, polyamory)
i’ve been looking for the fic where steve or bucky experiments in sex work and does a porny photoshoot that turns into a threesome w peggy on set for like an hour now and can’t find it. any idea?
buckycuddlebuddy and somesortofitalianroast sent in Push It by thepinupchemist (oneshot | 8,982 | E)
eclipseofparis said:
Hi! I hope you’re all doing well. I’d like to ask if you know or are familiar with this fic. It’s a time travel au (??) where Bucky as The Winter Soldier was accidentally or purposefully sent by Hydra to the 1930s? or 1940s? to kill pre-war Steve Rogers. Before Bucky went back, he told Steve abt Pierce. TFA timeline still happens and when Steve woke up to the new century, he acts all oblivious but in actuality he was plotting his revenge on Pierce. He did killed Pierce in the end I think?
Anon sent in Savage God by LenneWithMilkAndHoney, PottersPink (restricted, complete | 36,127 | M)
Anon 4 said:
i’m looking for a fic I read before, what I remember is bucky works at a company where steve is like the boss/ceo and steve is an ass and fires him one day, then later steve asks bucky if he wants to be in a D/s relationship with him and Bucky moves in to steve’s apartment? that’s all I remember, I hope it’s enough!
buckycuddlebuddy, miraishu, Anon, keepyourelectriceyeonme, wayward-lives, its-a-harlequinade and time-lord-no-more sent in Collar Full of Chemistry by 2bestfriends (complete | 188,111 | E)
Anon 5 said:
hi, I’m looking for a doc that I’m pretty sure is from Buckys pov and it has a recurring motif of a story about a woman going into a river. very literary, it’s like the type of story that has an all lowercase title. Hope that helps
Anon 6 said:
Hi! I’m looking for a WIP fic where both Bucky and Steve are princes. Steve comes to live with Bucky because Steve’s dad thinks it will help Steve learn how to be a better prince. I remember Thor working as the stables guy too. Peggy and Becca are also Bucky’s older sisters in this fic. Thanks!
Anon, emzy2 and possibleplatypus sent in Amaryllis by paperstorm (complete | 70,386 | E)
Anon 7 said:
I'm looking for a fic(probs 1 chap) that basically takes place in a nightclub or somewhere similar, and Bucky sees a girl with a pixie cut and black sparkly dress at the bar, goes to talk to her, and realizes that she is, in fact, a dude(Steve) pretty sure hes not trans,,, the do the dirty,,, pretty sure there's fanart in it too
Anon 8 said:
Hi, what’s that fic where Steve has to teach Bucky how to masturbate or at least just had to be in the same room as him? I stopped reading it a while ago and there’s a lot of works in my ao3 bookmarks that say deleted and I’m scared that’s one of them! Thank you
possibleplatypus sent in Need A Hand? by TeamDamon (complete | 14,555 | E)
keepyourelectriceyeonme sent in both fics mentioned in this post as possible answers
sleeplingsupernova said: (HTP)
We can't find this story anywhere anymore. It was an HTP where the Winter Soldier just got through a mind wipe and was still in the chair and a doctor was trying to give him a blow job and kept getting mad at him because he couldn't get hard. I remember reading it on AO3 but no matter what I try to search up I can't find it. Thank you so much!
Anon 9 said:
There was a story I read once where Bucky worked at planned parenthood and would escort women from their cars into the clinic, protecting them from the protesters? I can't find it and I was wondering if you guys know what I'm talking about? Thanks!
Anon 10 said:
im so sorry this is vague but im looking for a book with the cap quartet in sams house i believe? all i can remember is that bucky drags steve under a dining room table because hes trying to protect him when something makes a loud noise in the house, im pretty sure it was sam dropping a pan. thank you if you can think of it!
Anon 11 said:
Hey, im looking for a fic where steve is buckys neighbor and he has a little kid. Bucky also a kid, but he's older, maybe a teen. Bucky has a crush on steve and starts helping him out like driving him to work and shoveling his snow because he's struggling and always seems to be late to work. Ive tried hard to find it but i cant, please help!
Anon 12 said: (sex work)
looking for this fic: steve find bucky in an alley (?) and because they used to know each other he offers bucky a place to stay, but bucky thinks thinks steve wants some sexual favour in return because he’s been doing that for a while (i think he was homeless?). steve doesn’t want any of that and takes bucky to his place, i think i remember that he was rich or that it was a penthouse or smth? anyways bucky starts trusting steve again and eventually they get together. i’m worried it’s deleted 😭
cafelesbian and its-a-harlequinade sent in tell me how to breathe in and feel no hurt* by Cafelesbian (complete | 198,037 | M) *rape/noncon
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illfoandillfie · 5 years
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5 Simple Rules for a Successful Fake Relationship: The Proposal
Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader
Summery: Your's and Ben's agents approach you about pretending to date in order to boost interest in your new movie.
Warnings: Nothing for this chapter other than some swearing maybe? Things may get a little spicy in later chapters though.
Words: 5843
AN: This fic was written for El @laedymoon​ for her 1K celebration! I took the trope 'fake dating' and this was the result! Honestly fake dating is one my my fave tropes and I've been wanting to try my hand at it for a while so this was so much fun to write! Originally it was meant to be a one shot but when have I ever been good at sticking to plans lmao? Instead it'll probably end up as a three or four part series, maybe with an epilogue as well, who knows.
I’d also like to point out I started writing this months before we got those photos of Ben and Olivia so this was in no way inspired by anyone’s theories about whether or not their relationship is a PR stunt and I’m not particularly interested in that kind of talk.
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Taglist: @laedymoon​​  @dtfrogertaylor​​   @ezmina98​​  @vee-ndetta​​ @atomic-watermelon​​ @kellypenac​​ @labessieisallama​​ @deakyclicks​​ @jennyggggrrr​​ @drowseoftaylor​​  @hannafuckingsucks​​  @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming​​ @queenmylovely​​ @supersonicfreddie​
You’d known fake celebrity relationships were a thing that happened, you just never expected to be approached about one. But, here you were, sat next to Ben in an office usually reserved for producers meetings, a slight frown on his face as he listened to your agents explain how beneficial it would be if the public believed you were a couple.  “It’ll be good for the movie,” your agent, Mary, said matter-of-factly, “Studies show that if people – particularly women ages 15 – 45, the exact demographic we’re targeting – believe a real romance sprouted during the course of filming a movie, they are 78% more likely to see the movie. Plus, your names in the tabloids mean more exposure for both of you which means more offers in future, no matter how well this movie does in the box office. It’s all about being seen, people knowing your names.”  “Are you serious?” Ben asked slowly, glancing to you, as if trying to determine your reaction.  “Look, Ben, obviously we can’t force you or Y/N to do this,” his agent, Peter, introduced to you moments before, said, “the movie has already started filming and everyone appreciates your opinions, so saying no isn’t going to affect your jobs. But,” he paused, making sure the words were getting through to you both, “we strongly recommend you consider it. There are enough pros to make it worthwhile and it would only have to last until a week or two after the premiere. We can give you the rest of the day to think it over and make your decisions, but we will require an answer by tomorrow morning. If you agree, we can discuss terms and get everything in order to run the first story early next week.” 
You and Ben left, tempted to laugh at the strangeness of your morning.   “Think I need a coffee after that. You wanna come over to my trailer for a cup?”  “Yeah, okay, sounds good,” you followed him quietly for a moment, thinking over the conversation you’d just been part of, “What do you think?”  “About what? Coffee? You know I love it,”  “Not coffee, the whole pretending to date thing,”  “Oh that,” you could almost hear his eyes roll.   “You don’t think it’s worth it?”  He paused.  “Saying no won’t hurt my feelings,” you nudged his shoulder, hoping to ease his obvious discomfort, “it is a weird situation.”  “Weird is an understatement. And weren’t you with that Luke guy, what would he say about it?”  “He’ll say nothing since we’re not seeing each other anymore,”  “Wait, what?”  “Yeah that lasted like three dates and went nowhere, I haven’t seen him in weeks.”  “Oh, sorry.”  You shrugged, “What’s there to be sorry for, he was boring. Anyway, we were talking about you and me.”  “Right, that.” Ben opened the door to his trailer and waved you inside, following you over the threshold, “What do you think about it?”  “I’m not opposed to it. We already spend a lot of our time pretending to date anyway.”  Ben chuckled as he flicked the small kettle on, grabbing your two mugs and the instant coffee.  “Plus it would be good to get our names out there a bit more. And we're friends, right?” After the weeks of pre-production costume fittings and script read-throughs you certainly thought you were friends and hoped Ben did too.  “Of course we’re friends doofus,”  “Thanks dweeb. But that means it'll be fun getting to hang out and stuff.”   “So, wait, you think it’s a good idea?”  “Well it can’t hurt, can it?”  Ben frowned, forehead creased, “Don’t you think it’s all a bit, well, daft? As if us dating, real or not, would really have an impact on the movie, I think that’s bullshit. Plus, y’know, the work we’d have to put in to making it seem real or whatever. That’s just inviting extra stress into our lives and extra work which it doesn’t sound like we’d be getting paid for. Acting’s fun but I don’t want to spend every waking moment doing it.”  “Well it wouldn’t be every waking moment would it? Just the ones when they had photographers around. They’ll get a few photos of us leaving set holding hands or out having dinner together and spin it into a big romantic story and all we’d have to do is hold hands and have dinner. And you can’t call bullshit when they had actual statistics to back them up.”  “It sounds like you’re trying to convince me.”  “No, if you don’t want to I don’t mind, but I also don’t see anything wrong with it. And I think you should actually think about it instead of writing it off instantly.”  “So if I said I was into it, you’d want to?”  You shrugged, “Yeah. I want this movie to do well, I want this job to go somewhere. And if I have to date you to make that happen I will. That sounded better in my head. I just mean that I’m happy to pretend to date you, even if I wouldn’t in real life, no offence.”  “I’m a little offended,” he chuckled, “but really can’t argue with that can I?”  “If you’re not comfortable with it, say so and we’ll tell them no,”  Ben paused, staring at you as he considered what you’d said, quiet for so long you were sure he was going to say he wasn’t interested. You were about to put him out of his misery and tell him you didn’t want to anymore when he spoke up.   “They did say it would be good for the movie and out careers,”  “Someone’s coming around,” you sing-songed, taking the mug he offered you.  “Alright, I admit, maybe not as awful an idea as I first thought. There are…some pros anyway. And I guess we can hear the terms and then make up our minds properly.”  “Aww, looks like I got myself a boyfriend,” 
The next morning you found out what you were in for if you did agree to it. Once again both of your agents were waiting in the office but this time a third person was with them when you arrived.  “Y/N, Ben, take a seat. This is Barry, he’s a representative from Paramount Pictures.”  Barry, with his salt and pepper hair and well cut suit, leaned forward in his seat to shake Ben’s hand and then yours with a pleasant greeting.  “Well,” Mary spoke up, “have you made a decision?”  Ben looked to you before he spoke, “It’s a tentative yes from both of us. We’d like to hear a bit more about it before we fully agree but, so far, it sounds okay.”  “Glad to have you on board,” Barry said, reaching into his bag and pulling out a manila folder full of paper.  “In that case, the terms,” Peter said, glancing around to make sure everyone was ready, “If you do agree, we’ll need you to sign some paperwork stating you understand your obligations and all that, so take a copy of these,” he took two small stapled documents from Barry, handing you each one, before passing another to Mary, “just so everyone has all the info at hand.”  “Are these the terms?”  “Yes. Don’t worry, we’ll explain, but it’s all laid out in there if you need clarification.”  “There’s more pages than I was expecting,” Ben said, already sounding like it was becoming too much work to worry about.  “You don’t have to worry about the last few pages, it’s mostly just legalese. Essentially, you’ll be required to act like a couple in public. That’s really all there is to it, though contractually it’s a little more complex.”  “What does that mean?”  “We just need you both to agree to perform specific relationship type moments that we can sell. For instance, Y/N, we will need you to be spotted by paparazzi leaving Ben’s apartment a couple of times. Or vice versa. It is the 21st century afterall.”  “You mean like a walk of shame?” you asked, glancing at the paper in your hand.  “That’s not the official term on the contract but it’s more or less correct. You’ll need to change clothes, make it look like you stayed the night even if you didn’t really.”  “Wouldn’t it be more traditional to wear the previous day’s gear?”  “Perhaps but if you’re in the same clothes as the day before the paparazzi can’t sell the photos as easily because they can’t prove they were taken on different days. We want to make these photos easy to sell and easy to circulate. To that end, some paparazzi and gossip blogs will be tipped off by the studio and hopefully word will spread as the buzz around you gets stronger.”  “There will also be required dates, of course. At least one of them needs to take place at the French restaurant Boucher because they have a partnership with the studio. There is also a clause about an argument, provided people become interested in your relationship and we keep it going all the way to the premiere.”  “Wait, an argument?” Ben flipped through his papers, trying to find the right section.  “You just have to be caught arguing, or at least looking like you’re angry and about to fight, just so we can sell the whole trouble in paradise storyline.”  “People like conflict,” Mary shrugged, “Otherwise all we need is the two of you to act like a couple in public, maybe a few social media posts, from now until a week after the theatre release. After that you’re free to ‘break up’, though you will also need to sign a non-disclosure agreement which will stop you from talking about it for a few years. We’ll organise a few magazines and gossip sites to run stories about the split and, depending on how the public react to your story, may later run some Ben and Y/N, back together question mark type pieces, entirely fabricated of course.”  “You will attend the premiere together and, obviously, do press together. We will tell reporters not to ask about your personal lives, so no one suspects the relationship to be fake, though a few questions may slip through. Though we don’t expect this movie to earn any award nominations since it’s not being marketing for any there may be some later down the track. In that case we may ask you to extend your relationship long enough to attend the ceremonies together, provided you aren’t working on other projects at the time.”  “The only other requirements are that, a few times a week you allow yourselves to be seen in public. Hand holding, kissing, really sell the whole fallen in love thing. That’s it really.”  “And we can’t even tell our families?”  “One leak is all it would take to have this revealed. You tell your mum who accidentally lets slip to the neighbour who sells it to a magazine. And if it’s revealed it could be harmful when it comes to box office numbers, which is the exact opposite of what we want. But enough of these have been done so that we know how to manage them, and all you have to do is keep quiet about it and act like you’re in love. Easy. Are you both on board?”  Barry, who’d been quiet throughout the meeting, leaned forward expectantly.  You already knew what to say, "I’m in if Ben is,”  Ben chewed his lip as he skimmed over the paper in his hands again. He sighed and raised his eyes to where Barry sat, waiting.  “I don’t know I-”  You’d seen it coming, his answer. Really it wasn’t much of a surprise. Ben didn’t strike you as the sort of person to go in for schemes like this and he’d been hesitant from the second it was suggested. You heard him sigh again as his gaze landed on you and you wondered if he thought less of you for wanting to be part of it.  “Okay. I’m in.”  You were a little stunned by his change of heart but you were the only one. Everyone else in the room seemed relieved and a little frantic, Barry reaching back into his bag, Mary and Peter talking over each other to assure you both that you’d made the right choice.  “Glad to hear that, Ben,” Barry was saying as he pulled out another folder of documents, “Now, we’ll need you to both to sign here.” 
After shooting was done for the day you accompanied Ben to a small pub for a drink. Mary and Peter had left the meeting on their phones making hurried calls to get photos of the two of you leaving the set together. You’d jumped a little as Ben grabbed your hand before realising why his fingers were linked through your own. It was warm and he didn’t let you go until you reached the pub, the snap of cameras audible as you walked down the street. You found a booth while Ben headed to the bar, returning a little later with a drink in each hand.   “One G and T for my girlfriend,” he laughed as he put the drink in front of you and slid into the seat opposite.  “Y’know if you told me last week that I’d have had a boyfriend before we finished filming and that it was you, I would have laughed.”  “God me too. Our jobs are so bizarre. Literally what other profession would encourage you to pretend to date?”  You laughed and pulled out the papers you’d been given that morning, “And who’d have thought there’d be so many contractual requirements.”  “We should add our own set of rules. Like just so we’re clear about what we’d be uncomfortable doing or whatever.”  “Safewords?”  “Get your mind out of the gutter. Christ, you fake ask a girl out and suddenly all she can think about is sex.”  “My mind was in the gutter long before we were set up.”  He let out a huff of laughter and shook his head, reaching for his glass.  “I know what you mean though. We should definitely define some things,” you grabbed your bag and began digging through it for a pen. When you found it, you turned the papers over giving you a blank canvas to work on, “Firstly sex.”  “Should have known,”  “May as well start with the big one. Rule 1: No Sex. Completely off the table.” you took a sip of your drink as you began jotting it down.  “Your wank game strong?”  The conversation was interrupted as you choked on your drink, finally recovering enough to splutter, “excuse me?”  “Well it sounds like we might be together for a while. Can’t go on any tinder dates or anything since that would look like cheating. You sure you can last that long?  “100 per cent.”  “Alright, if you’re sure. Rule one, no sex.”  You finished writing it down, rolling your eyes, “What about PDAs? We have to do some but is there anything you’d be uncomfortable with?”  “I’m not really one for like public make out sessions,”  “Thank god, me neither.”  “Okay, good. What about cuddling and that kind of thing. Man this is weird to talk about,”  “Yeah, is a bit. I can do some cuddling in public but y'know, nothing too much. Hugs are fine, an arm around my shoulders is fine. Holding hands is obviously okay.”  “What about an arm around the waist?”  “Hmmm….maybe. Yeah, I think I’d be okay with that. But your hand never goes below my lower back. I will have no arse grabs or pinches or hands in my back pocket.”  “Wasn’t planning on that but good to know. Does cuddling include lap sitting?”  “Absolutely not.”  “Okay, strong boundaries, I respect that. You going to write all that down?”  “Rule 2: PDAs kept respectable and to a minimum. And rule 3: hands above the belt at all times. What about our families and friends?” you asked as you made notes on acceptable PDAs, “chances are we’re going to have to deal with them at some point since they’re going to think it’s real.”  “Okay, um, how about…no meeting anyone unless there’s a reason like a family gathering you’d be expected to bring a partner to. And if that does come up we can work out a game plan then.”  “Make sense. Rule 4: No families unless no escape.” 
By the time you left the pub, your list of rules tucked into your bag, it was quite late.   “Hey, you wanna crash at mine tonight?” Ben asked, “we can text Peter and Mary, let them know so they can organise paparazzi for the morning.”  “Tonight? I don’t have a toothbrush or a change of clothes or anything.”  “We’ll pop into a shop and buy you a new toothbrush, should probably get you one for my place anyway since apparently you’ll be staying over more than once. And I’m sure I’ve got something you can sleep in.”  “And tomorrow? Can’t wear this again in case we get photographed.”  “I’ll give you something and then I’ll drop you home in the morning,” he shrugged.   “I guess that would work,”  “C’mon, it’ll be like a sleepover. Stay up late and talk about boys, have things devolve into a sexy pillow fight, sleepover stuff.”  “And you say my mind lives in the gutter.”  “That’s not a no,”  “Alright, I’ll crash at yours. Closer to here than mine is anyway.”  “Awesome,” he grinned at you, “c’mon, this way….babe?”  “Didn’t sound so convincing there, Ben,” you snorted.  “You should have used a pet name then, instead of my actual one. And I was just testing the waters, what’d you think?”  “Babe’s okay. As long as we don’t get into weirdly cutesie things like turtle dove or snookums.”  “You don’t want me to call you snookums? How about cuddle bunny? Pumpkin pie?”  “Oh fuck off,”  “Think you mean fuck off honey bear.”  “Rule 5: Standard pet names only!” 
As much as he clearly enjoyed teasing you, Ben made sure you had a good time with him. He took your hand again but it was only so he could pull you into the warmth of a small Chinese restaurant. It was one he seemed to regularly visit judging by the way the man at the counter knew Ben’s order straight away. He seemed a little surprised when Ben asked to add extra dishes, eyes darting to your entwined hands, and then back to Ben’s face, but he said nothing, just cheerily gave Ben the new price.  “What was that about?” you asked as you walked the last block to Ben’s door, each of you carrying a bag, his full of food and yours supplies from the grocery store, “the look he gave you when he saw me?”  “Oh, that’s nothing. I used to go to that place a lot with my ex and then we broke up and I kept going on my own cause it’s close and it’s fucking good food. But, um, they know me pretty well and I guess it’s been a while since I took a girl there.”  “Well I’m flattered that you chose me to be part of this touching moment,” you laughed and followed Ben to his front door, taking the second bag from him so he could pull his keys from his pocket and let you in. You’d never been inside Ben’s place before so you let him lead you down the hallway towards the kitchen, taking charge of pulling everything from the bags as Ben got out plates and cutlery.  “Oh shit, hang on gotta text Mary and Peter,”  You took over dividing up the food as Ben dug his phone out of his pocket. A few seconds after he’d sent the message and put his phone down a ding made him snatch it back up again.  “Peter says there’ll be someone here to snap us while we leave. They want us to kiss if possible. Guess it’s really started then,”  “Guess so. Can I ask one thing?”  “Sure,” he said it slowly, almost nervously.  “Why’d you change your mind about this? I thought for sure you’d say no.”  “Oh, that. I don’t know, I guess I figured it wouldn’t hurt, especially if it was going to benefit the movie. C’mon, don’t want this to go cold,”  You weren't sure you believed him but you let him shrug off the question as you picked up your plate and followed him into the living room. The next couple of hours were spent eating and watching trashy reality tv shows, making jokes at their expense. You and Ben kept talking long after the show ended, until he realised how late it was getting.  “Better turn in otherwise I won’t get up in the morning,” he laughed.  “Yeah, probably a good plan,” you stretched out on the couch, placing a cushion under your head.  “C’mon, I’ll show you to your room.”  “You mean I’m not sleeping on the couch?”  “Oh my god you’re a dork,” he threw another cushion at you, “I have a spare room you can use.”  “Well I didn’t know that,” you laughed as you pushed yourself to your feet, following him back down the hallway towards a closed door you hadn’t noticed before.  “Nah, you’re all good. It’s honestly mostly used by my friend Joe when he’s travelling over this way. There’re clean sheets in the linen press in the bathroom which is the next door on the right, and extra blankets in the cupboard just there. Also watch the blinds if you try to close them, they can be a little stiff. If there’s anything else you need let me know, my bedroom is at the end of the hall, near the living room.”  “Some PJs would be good, if it’s no trouble.”  “Oh right, yeah of course, give me a second.”  You dropped your bag in a corner of the room and then popped into the bathroom to grab some sheets. Ben came back with an old t-shirt and some flannel pants.  “These are mine so they’ll probably be a bit big but they’ll be fine for the night. And they’ll look good for the camera in the morning.”  “Thanks,”  “That everything?”  “Think so, night Ben,”  “Night, snookums.”  “Rule five mister,”   Ben just laughed, pulling your door shut behind him.  
Waking up in Ben’s spare room was mildly confusing. The bed faced a different direction than yours did, the blinds blocked out too much of the morning light, and the sheets felt different. But the previous night came back to you and then the reason you were staying at Ben’s did too. It made you too nervous to go back to sleep, too restless to stay there, so you got up and stumbled to the door, opening it just in time to see Ben leaving the bathroom.  “Morning,” he groaned with half shut eyes and sleep mussed hair, “you want a coffee?”  “Please. Thanks.”  He yawned, acknowledging your answer with a nod and left the bathroom to you. When you were done you found him in the kitchen with a steaming mug of coffee in his hands and a second on the bench in front of him. You took it gratefully, letting the warm caffeine wake you up.”  “Breakfast? I can offer you toast or cereal unless you wanna wait for pancakes to cook.”  You shook your head, “Don’t normally eat breakfast,”  Ben looked aghast, “You know breakfast’s important, right?”  “Shhh, lemme wake up before you start lecturing me,”  Ben smiled into his own mug, falling silent until you’d downed half your drink, “You good now? Alert?”  “Close enough. Please don’t tell me about breakfast though.”  “I wasn’t going to. There was another text from Peter this morning.”  “What’d it say?”  “Well, a photographer will be here around nine-ish ready for us, but they said he’ll stay for as long as we take.”  “Okay.”  “And, um, he was very careful in how he worded it, but they want us to look like we fucked. Also I told them I’d take you home so there may be someone waiting for us there too, he never got back to me on it.”  “Shit, okay. Umm, guess I’ll just wear this then?” you indicated the pyjamas you’d borrowed, “might lose the pants though, help sell it a bit more.”  “Yeah, guess so,” Ben cleared his throat and took a sip of coffee, his eyes firmly fixed over your shoulder.  “What time is is?”  “Uhhhh,” he glanced at the oven, “Twenty past eight.”  “God I haven’t been up this early on a weekend in months.”  “Not one for farmers markets or anything then?”  “Not really. Much prefer lying in bed doing nothing.”  “Me too,”  “We’re meant for each other,” you laughed, “did you want to have a shower or anything?”  “Nah, you can if you want though,”  “Might as well wait until I get home. But I am gonna clean my teeth, especially if we have to kiss.”  “Maybe mess up your hair too, make it look like you didn’t sleep much.”  “Well how could I when you’re such a good lover,”  “I know you’re joking but if anyone asks, I’m incredible. You came like three times.”  “Did I now?”  “Of course.”  “Good thing no one’s gonna ask then, don’t think I’m great at lying.”  “You’re an actress, Y/N. Besides, it’s not really a lie, I am that good. You just haven’t experienced it personally.”  You poked your tongue out at Ben as you stood and headed towards the bathroom again but you did as he’d suggested and messed your hair up as much as you could. 
“How do I look?” you ask Ben when you were done.  “Gorgeous,” he said, eyes raking over every inch of your appearance from the ruffled hair to the hint of panda eyes you’d manufactured with your eyeshadow to the slightly unbuttoned flannel shirt and missing pants.  “But do I look like I’ve been thoroughly fucked?”  “Oh, right, umm, yes I think so,”  “You do? I feel like theres something missing.” You darted back into the bathroom to look in the mirror again, “Oh! I know. Might be taking it a bit far though.”  “What is it?” Ben asked, following you and watching you in the mirror.  “What if you gave me a hickey?”  “Y/N, I-”  “Yeah, I know, that’s a weird thing to ask. Don’t worry, I think we’ll be fine without it.”  Ben’s cheeks puffed up with air that he slowly let escape his lips, “no, you’re right, if I’d really slept with you last night I would have marked you up a bit. A hickey will definitely make it look more authentic.”  “It’s not totally inappropriate for me to ask?”  “No, no, we have to make it look legit, it’s a good suggestion. Here, I’ll uhh,” he stepped in close, one hand tentatively winding around your waist to pull you back against him, the other moving to push your hair aside. His breath was hot as he leaned into your neck. You saw him glance at your reflection, eyebrows slightly furrowed, but then his lips were on your skin, sucking at you until a bruise formed. Your own breath quickened with the contact but you knew it was just because he’d found a particularly sensitive spot and it had been a while since anyone had handled you like that. It was still just Ben and it was still part of your jobs. But all the same you let your eyes slip shut and hummed at how nice it felt. You were almost disappointed when it was over. Ben stood there for a moment, head bent over your neck, long enough to take a deep breath, but then he seemed to collect himself, taking a quick step back.  “Will that do?”  “It’s great Ben, really ties the whole look together.”  Ben returned your smile but it didn’t quite reach his eyes, “Good. Good. Okay then, I’ll umm, what time is it?”  “Just after nine,” you said, glancing at your phone, “wonder if the photographer is here yet.”  “I think I will jump in for that shower actually, by the time I’m done he definitely will be.”  “Okay,”  “Make yourself comfortable though, watch some TV or something.”  “Alright. Thanks for being so cool about all this. I know you’re a little sceptical about the benefits and everything.”  “It’s fine, Y/N, no need for any of that.” He smiled again as you left the bathroom and the door shut behind you, but it still seemed off.  
You settled onto the couch to flick TV channels, pausing at a breakfast news show and then at some kids cartoon you didn’t recognise, only stopping when Ben entered the room, clean and dressed.   “Hey, I was wondering,” you said, turning towards him, “should I give you a hickey as well?”  “No,”  You were a little taken aback by how quickly he’d answered.  “I mean, I think that’d be overkill. Keep it up our sleeves for next time, yeah?”  “Okay, yeah, sure,”  “Is he there?”  “I think so.”  Ben walked towards the window and twitched the curtain aside just enough to peek out, “Yeah, looks like him. Big camera pointing at my front door.”  “Okay,” your heart began to beat a little faster, “show time then,”  “Show time.” Ben nodded as he turned back to you.  “Do we have a plan? I kinda wish I had a script right about now,”  Ben laughed a little and you thought he seemed more himself, “I think you should go out first so they can get a good clean shot and then I come out after, maybe with my hand on your back?”  “Sounds good,”  “Okay, umm, I’ll lock the door and when I turn around you kiss me and then I’ll open the passenger door for you and we’ll drive to your place.”  “Don’t bother opening my door. I’m not big into that kind of gesture, plus I think if we were actually being caught by the paparazzi, we’d be getting into the car as quick as possible. Maybe throw a look his way like you aren’t happy about being photographed just so it doesn’t seem too staged.”  “Okay, no opening doors, noted.”  You shrugged, “I just think it’s a bit old fashioned and unnecessary,”  “I’ll keep that in mind for our dates. You ready to do this?”  You nodded and stood up, leading the way to the front door. Ben collected his keys and wallet and placed a hand on the lower part of your back, your signal to open the door and step outside.   “Kinda wish I had pants on,” you said softly, “It’s a bit brisk,”  Ben chuckled as he followed you out, “We’ll put the heating on in the car for you,” he turned to lock the door. You watched him, fingers gripping the key a little tighter than he perhaps normally would, and as soon as he began to turn back around you were moving towards him, one hand thrown around his neck, the other in his hair as your pressed your lips to his. His hand found your back again, pulling you in close as he kissed you back fiercely, as if he were unwilling to let you go after such a good night together, the kiss of a man falling in love. For half a second you forgot it was an act. And then he was gone, his nose brushing yours briefly before there was space between you. You felt a little dazed with Ben looking at you so softly but you took a deep breath and reality came back to you. With another breath your turned and headed towards the car, able to hear the rapid click��click click of the camera. You shot a look towards the noise and then got into the car, Ben hopping into the driver’s seat about a second later.  
“You’re a good actor,” you said before silence could settle between you, “I already knew that, of course, but the kiss was really good. Almost completely believable.”  “As long as it’s believable enough in the photos,”  “I’m sure it will be. I think we pulled it off.”  Ben nodded, “Yeah. You still chilly?”  “Little bit,”  He reached over and twisted one of the dials blindly, warm air suddenly washing over your goosebump covered legs, “better?”  “So much, thanks.”  “I think he might be following us,”  “You did tell them we were going to mine, s’pose he’ll be trying to grab a couple of shots of us there.”  “Yeah, probably.”  “Should we come up with another game plan? Maybe you walk me to my door, we stand there talking for a bit, saying goodbye. I stay and watch you leave before I go inside.”  “Perfect. Is another kiss part of the goodbye?”  “Careful Ben, you sound almost like you want to kiss me,” you laughed, “but yes, think it needs to be.” 
It went completely according to plan. By the time you were getting out of the car the photographer had pulled up outside your house, his camera sticking out the window of his car so he didn’t miss his shot. The camera clicked as Ben took your hand and you led him to your door.  “Well, guess that’s it for today. I did have fun with you last night, even if it wasn’t the kind of fun everyone else will think it was.”  “Yeah, me too. Happy to have you stay anytime you want to be photographed again. Maybe we’ll get you some PJs that can live at mine though.”  “Probably for the best. If this goes well I can see them wanting us to do it again soon.”  “Oh definitely. They’ll probably have notes for us so we can get an even better performance next time. You ready to wow them with another kiss?”  “Lay it on me, babe,”  “Anything you want, snookums,”  You groaned but before you could protest too much Ben was kissing you again, softer than before, no longer trying to convince you to stay, just trying to prolong the moment before the goodbye. It left you a little breathless as he cupped your cheek, leaving his hand there when he pulled away. As you opened your eyes you saw him bite his lip and then he leaned in to leave you with a final chaste peck before his fingers slipped from your skin and he was walking away. You let out a long exhale as you watched him go, waving as the car took off. Once you were alone inside, the door firmly shut behind you, you laughed at how ridiculous the whole arrangement was. But at least Ben was a good kisser. Not too firm, not too wet, just the right amount of tongue. Believable enough to give you butterflies.  
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carlyfrombleachers · 4 years
Text
Liveblogging of TS6 (reputation)
Okay. Let me preface this by saying I don’t like Taylor Swift. I think she’s a boring artist, who brings close to nothing to the table. The reason I’m even listening to Reputation is because I keep getting recommended an interview of Jack Antonoff where he talks about New Year’s Day (which is a song on Reputation) and I really want to watch that but I also want to know what the fuck he’s talking about. So here we are. Don’t expect more stuff like this from me. I expect this to be just a one-off thing. Swifties, don’t fucking come after me or I will cry. The only other TS album I listened to was Lover, and I thought it was trash. Absolute garbage. And apparently this one is worse than Lover. I don’t know if I’ll regret this.
Let’s begin, I guess.
...Ready For It?
I keep thinking of that one voice clip from the Hannah Montana intro (?) where you faintly hear a girl say “are you ready for it?” and that’s my first impression just by looking at the title.
I’m hitting ‘play’ right now.
Oh nevermind, I forgot to pay Deezer this month. YouTube it is.
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Hey look, Ajay is in my recommended. Queen of reactions.
Help what is this
rockstar taylor??
what the fuck is up with the beat
chorus felt weak. this is my first opinion im not done with the track
i looked at the music video for 3 seconds and i saw a horse bye
i was distracted by the music video help i dont like this
since i looked at the music video for just a lil while i should say it looks weird. it is weird in a bad way it looks like some knockoff cyberpunk thing.
why didnt she just name this “Are You Ready For It?”
I’m... not particularly blown away by this track. It’s fine. I wouldn’t bop to it but I wouldn’t object to it playing somewhere. It’s like... it’s decent.
End Game (ft. Ed Sheeran, Future)
I don’t know who Future is.
she said reputation haha thats the name of the album
ok future is a rapper i dont listen to rap thats why i dont know him
after listening to lover i cant believe this is the same woman this is so weird
not looking forward to the ed sheeran part
“i wanna be your end game” this wasnt really what i was expecting
fuck off ed sheeran (i just reached his part)
according to some tabloid lady gaga mistook ed sheeran for a waiter? i would do the same thing if i saw this redhead fuckface on the street as well lol
“big reputation, big reputation, you and me got a big reputation” so deep!!!
I guess I should take this time to-- is she rapping?
Sorry, I got distracted. I don’t think every song needs to be this huge deep piece that must be deeply analyzed for centuries, but I do expect some interesting message or context for a track at least. If it sounds good, I’d also give it a pass. 
This one? This was boring. I would not verbally object to this playing close to me, I would just have a grossed out look on my face during the chorus.
I Did Something Bad
I keep reading the title in Akasaka Sad’s tune. You know the part where Rina says “A-ka-sa-ka sad, I’m a sucker”? I keep thinking “I did-I did something bad”. I don’t expect it to be like that.
“i never trust a narcissist but they love me” taylor talks about her fanbase
sorry to drag swifties publicly but i will forever take an opportunity to drag a swiftie
predictable antithesis use there with “i did something bad so why does it feel so good” but okay
why was taylor branded a snake again? she pretended it was “””gone””” with lover but like. it’s weird. its not like she punched kanye on stage in 2008 or something. i dont care enough to search for evidence that taylor is a snake so lol go off i guess
dont enjoy the post-chorus part where she’s like drddddddd dddddddd it feels so distracting the gunshots were more than enough
Yeah, this one was fine. My favorite up to this point, I think.
Don’t Blame Me
lol she said “dont blame me” then it buffered bye
i was showering for the past 25 minutes hello i was listening to track 10 and melodrama
i am enjoying this one kinda
“dont blame me love made me crazy” haha wait until you find out what your next era is
“i once was poison ivy now im your daisy” this is a pretty good line honestly
obligatory katy flop moment: haha taylor could hit the high notes in daisy
this sounds like a country song especially in the chorus i dont know what to really make of it
“loooord save me” this is why your female fans are called horse girls
This was... pretty good. The chorus weirds me out still, but it had its good moments. It was nice.
Delicate
stop saying reputation in the reputation album
this autotune voice bits of hers are so distracting
i say as i listen to how i’m feeling now by charli xcx
yes i did just roast myself. gotta leave the swifties with nothing
god the music video for this track has 400m views this woman is making my faves look like indie stars LOL
I keep getting distracted because this song is boring. It’s... okay. I guess. The music video was pretty cute. Nothing caught my attention in the track, but it sounds like gym music. It would play on a gym owned by a 30-something white woman during the yoga classes and you know it.
Look What You Made Me Do
We’ve all heard this song. I’m gonna listen to it and then be done with it.
I guess I’ll just watch the music video.
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ONE BILLION VIEWS????????????
Okay. I watched the music video.
Really? All the fem guys dancing with her?
I’m not going to sit here and be like “fem guys are BAD and should all die and never be represented” because… lol. But it is kind of annoying how it was literally just fem guys dancing with her and doing all those faces because you KNOW she was looking for the impressionable gays to go “omg taylor progressive!!!!” and go talk about it on social media.
But am I saying that because I don’t like Taylor? Yes. But that doesn’t make my point less valid.
The music video was pretty good, the production on this track is really good (thank you Jack Antonoff xx) and the track itself is good. Not outstanding or perfect or a serve, it’s good.
Also the ending with all her previous eras? That was cool. The uncool part is most of the “look how rich I am” parts… because we all know you’re rich, Taylor. Nice SFX.
So It Goes…
i got an ad whyyyyyyy
fuck this shit i cant keep up with what shes saying im pulling genius out for this one
this is not lyrically deep i can tell already from genius
im not a fan of love songs i already have CRJ to cover that base and Lorde covers breakup songs I guess and this song is just. boring. lol
Nothing really shocking or noteworthy here, it’s just.. okay.
Gorgeous
I got another ad FUCK
i got a boss baby ad help
god boss baby really was something huh i completely forgot about that
why am i talking about boss baby
okay. reputation
why did a baby say gorgeous
HELP i am so disappointed this is the one track with the lyric video and god this is disappointing
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i saw this and i was like “oh shit shes gonna talk about how its gonna be gorgeous when u die” or smth and
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lol. LOL. the depth is nonexistent and the bar is in hell
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who wrote this? you lied
This song is so boring, LOL. I expected so much from it and was instantly disappointed when the pre-chorus hit. You had everything on your plate and you ate the plate itself. Girl. What the hell. Why. You could’ve given us an anthem about hating your man, and you took the easy route.
Getaway Car
im intrigued
okay im listening and this sounds very jack antonoff? the shotgun thing made me immediately go o_o
it felt a bit weak at the end but at the start i was enjoying it quite a lot… i think this is my fave
I enjoyed this one quite a lot :) It was pretty good but not an amazing masterpiece. It was better than LWTMMD and that’s all I have to say.
King Of My Heart
sounds boring haha
taylor keeps putting these trap beats in things sister youre not lorde LOL
yeah this is kinda boring
WAIT A MINUTE NEW YEARS DAY IS THE LAST TRACK???? IM GONNA HAVE TO STICK UNTIL THE END oh my god please no
i dont. i .. i knew this would be happening but i didnt expect it to be the last one
i guess the timing is accurate ha ha ha ha
i just heard ariana grande
I keep hearing Ariana Grande on this track. Is that good? I don’t know.
Dancing With Our Hands Tied
why are there so many songs in this fucking album
the beat is.. okay. it is catchy
oh i like this i think. its pretty nice
the chorus is nice. yes. i do kind of enjoy this
Yeah, I liked this one. Pretty good writing, and it sounds great.
Dress
wtf is this song why is it so horny
horny taylor is weird stop being horny please
this song is okay i would not revisit it because its just weird. do not like this!!!
when carly rae jepsen says slide on through my window it is funny but when taylor sings i bought this dress so you could take it off i die
oh that second of silence was really good
[looks at the producer] [it’s jack antonoff] :)
This song weirds me out. I don’t like it. It had its moments production-wise but it was... weird.
This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things
I expect good things from this. With a title like that? Give me a bop.
Currently not being a bop.
Okay, it was cute. Nothing amazing. Just… fine. Cute attempt.
oh i liked the spoken part thats what i expected from this song
Call It What You Want
this is about genitalia this is my prediction
It was not about genitalia.
This song is pretty good if you remove all the mentions to her lover and her man and her baby, which are all the same person, I guess.
This is disappointing.
JACK ANTONOFF BACKING VOCALS
I LOVE YOU JACK
umm anyways
OH HE DID IT AGAIN IM GONNA CRY i love this man
I expected so much from this track and the chorus just… disappointed me.
JACK!!! I LOVE YOU!!!! KEEP SINGING!!!!!
i love this man im gonna cry
The highlight of this song is the part where Jack Antonoff sings.
New Year’s Day
wow the reason why im doing this shit
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look at him. :)
this song was cute. nothing special. just cute. very okay.
just. okay. yeah. pretty fine.
nothing special.
Final Thoughts On The Album
It was better than Lover.
I expected this to be a concept album, all about the drama she’s gotten into? But it was just boring love songs with some extra flair. I expected great things from this album, having only heard LWYMMD from it before this. A concept album that’s just an answer/clapback to everyone’s who wronged her à la Yellow Flicker Beat (I know it’s for a movie but that song slaps and I don’t know a thing about Hunger Games) would’ve been PERFECT but it was just... love songs. I need Taylor to stop singing about love and start serving us big meals.
I would not like to revisit this. Like, 5/10. It could’ve been a lot better, but it wasn’t because you’re too afraid to cross some lines, Taylor.
Final Ranking:
Dancing With Our Hands Tied
Getaway Car
Look What You Made Me Do
I Did Something Bad
Don’t Blame Me
New Year’s Day
Call It What You Want
...Ready For It?
This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things
So It Goes...
End Game (feat. Ed Sheeran, Future)
Dress
Delicate
King Of My Heart
Gorgeous
taylor flop stream gone now
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littlelovelymemes · 7 years
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‘  let me just make one thing clear... i have no clue what’s going on, ever, at any moment, at any point in time. who knows what’s going on? not me. not ever.  ’ ‘  i would just like to publicly announce that i have no idea what i am doing  ’ ‘  we came from the same star and we will come together again in the end  ’ ‘  i have a ‘why am i like this’ moment at least five times a day  ’ ‘  did i need it? no. did i buy it? yes.  ’ ‘  the most dangerous game is resting your eyes after you turned off the alarm clock in the morning  ’ ‘  petition for stars in the day time please???  ’ ‘  i love it when i wake up and stretch and something cracks. makes me feel like a glo-stick  ’ ‘  drop whatever you’re doing right now and climb a tree  ’ ‘  the most fucked up part of adult life is how you can just decide to do things  ’ ‘  i’m a person who wants to do lots of things trapped inside a body that wants to SLEEP at all times  ’ ‘  i’m so tired but i’ll probably be awake until 3 am for no reason  ’ ‘  time to kick my own ass. bitch had it coming for too long  ’ ‘  honestly ‘thanks i hate it’ is one of the funniest phrases in the english language  ’ ‘  do you ever wonder how many people have loved you and never told you?  ’ ‘  the internets one true talent is making me sick of things i’ve never seen or read or heard  ’ ‘  i’m permanently emotionally damaged but it’s chill, i’m chill  ’ ‘  all cracker barrels are dimensionally linked. you could walk into a cracker barrel in georgia and walk out of one in arkansas and feel nothing  ’ ‘  ‘you look different with makeup’????? you think i’m buying shit for hundreds of dollars to just keep looking like my ugly self ... ok  ’ ‘  why did the fray go off so hard in ‘how to save a life’?  ’ ‘  anyone else bummed they have 2 sleep alone tonight and uh not in some1s arms  ’ ‘  not to be too controversial but i like it when people are nice   ’ ‘  the sun has no business tapping out at the tender hour of 5pm bitch i have depression  ’ ‘  i forgot how fucking weird november is theres no afternoon its just night after 2pm  ’ ‘  what time do you need me? i am unavailable whenever that time is  ’ ‘  look i may have made a few typos and committed a few murders but nobody’s perfect okay  ’ ‘  i guess at this point i should just consider dating myself  ’ ‘  i’m aiming for the “she’s a badass and cute as hell but i wouldn’t touch her without asking” look  ’ ‘  haha if you’re bored you could kiss me idk just sayin  ’ ‘  i see you’re paying attention to someone who is not me. why is that.  ’ ‘  80s music wont solve all my life’s problems but it certainly distracts me from them  ’ ‘  i cant believe what walkie talkies are called  ’ ‘  some people think life is like a rollercoaster but my life is more like one of those rides that spin really fast so you’re pinned to the wall and can’t do anything about it  ’ ‘  hey girl do you want to make a fragile human connection in the vast and unfeeling infinity of a chaotic universe  ’ ‘  all these fuckboys but who is the fuckfather  ’ ‘  i love drunk me but i don’t trust her  ’ ‘  do you have those people that you’d go anywhere with unconditionally, like they could say “lets go check out that dumpster” and you’d be like “im in”  ’ ‘  nah sorry i cant go out tonight, i have plans to spiral into uncontrollable anxiety starting in the early evening and ending at roughly 3 am  ’ ‘  me: queen of having had enough  ’ ‘  she needs a hug (i’m she)  ’ ‘  is it acceptable to start an essay with “listen here you little shit”?  ’ ‘  90% of my day is me being nervous  ’ ‘  cons: i’m an asshole. pros: i’m your asshole.  ’ ‘  give me 10 reasons why i shouldn’t just turn into a slug right now  ’ ‘  are we gonna fuckn hold hands tonight or what bitch  ’ ‘  dear soulmate, where the fuck are you  ’ ‘  i’m so easily revitalized by small, loving gestures  ’ ‘  i dont know what im feeling but there is a lot of it  ’ ‘  let’s be friends with benefits. the benefits? you get to be friends with me  ’ ‘  you ever just sit back and think like... yo... i really don’t care  ’ ‘  im surprised no one has ever punched me in the face  ’ ‘  what if mike was short for micycle  ’ ‘  hey fellow regular kids what’s up  ’ ‘  if u ever called me pretty i love you. ur pretty too  ’ ‘  do you ever just ‘there’s probably something medically wrong with me but i’m just gonna ignore it and hope i don’t die’?  ’ ‘  why did we stop building castles? i feel like humanity might live to regret that  ’ ‘  i’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace  ’ ‘  i am so glad you exist, even if you exist so far away from me  ’ ‘  i can hold a wet bar of soap better than a conversation  ’ ‘  she is beauty, she is grace, she got her feelings hurt 42 times today  ’ ‘  13 years of school and im still not sure if its ‘grey’ or ‘gray’  ’ ‘  hope u like bad girls because i’m bad at everything  ’ ‘  got a problem with me? kiss me on the lips dude  ’ ‘  too many songs about love. not enough songs about sword fights  ’ ‘  don’t talk to me or my 78 insecurities ever again  ’ ‘  i just did a tarot reading... it said ur a bitch  ’ ‘  a good substitute for love and fulfillment? a crunchwrap supreme from taco bell  ’ ‘  i fucked up? idk what you’re referring to but probably  ’ ‘  *in a high-pitched mocking voice* "are you okay?" what the fuck.  ’ ‘  how do u just..... not believe in aliens  ’ ‘  a coffee pot can be a coffee mug if you just don’t fucking care  ’ ‘  “you’re up early!” jokes on you i didn’t sleep at all and am in between energized and dying  ’ ‘  dont wanna sound like a slut but i really need a hug right now  ’ ‘  casual fan? no sorry i only know how to invest my whole livelihood into something and spend every waking moment thinking about said thing  ’ ‘  i have a dozen hearts swirling around my head irl like that isnt a filter its permanent  ’ ‘  i worry about you even when you say you’re fine  ’ ‘  i will never hurt you. i will always stick by your side. i will always try to make you smile  ’ ‘  true love: having to hold back your adorable, violent girlfriend to keep her from straight up murdering a dude  ’ ‘  cute date idea: be nice to me  ’ ‘  im so jealous of people who know what they want to do with their future i dont even know what t.v show to watch next  ’ ‘  me? clingy? yes please don’t leave me  ’ ‘  hey….,.,.. no offense but,,. i want someone to love and cherish me  ’ ‘  i need someone to lay in bed with me for hours  ’ ‘  dark hannah montana..... show me the worst of both worlds  ’ ‘  someone has to say it: come on eileen is a fucking banger like that shit snaps,, a bop for the century  ’ ‘  roses are red, i’m going to bed  ’ ‘  bless netflix for creating the skip intro button honestly  ’ ‘  they call me… 7 Knives. because that’s how many knives it takes me to cook things because i keep puttin em in the fuckin sink without thinking about it  ’ ‘  i wanna burry my face in someone’s chest right now til i fall asleep and wake up 4 hours later just to find i’m still in their arms  ’ ‘  the internet has ruined me honestly i’m numb to everything. it could be the end of the world and i’d be like “tag urself i’m the acid rain”  ’ ‘  lately i have been…….dying to be in love…,..and that’s the mood sadly  ’ ‘  not to be ns fw but i’d cry if someone kissed me on the cheek  ’ ‘  sexting? nah. i’m into spexting. spooky texting. ever seen a ghost? hmu.  ’ ‘  not to sound cocky as shit but i’m a fucking good person with a big heart and i deserve a lot more than the shitty hand life has dealt me this far  ’ ‘  i say i love you a lot because i do  ’ ‘  i’m sorry. i can’t come to the phone right now? why? oh. cause i hate talking on the phone please text me instead.  ’ ‘  low on self esteem, so u run on mac & cheese  ’ ‘  who’s gonna come lay with me in bed and let me wrap my legs and arms around u like a small bear  ’ ‘  youre a coward if youre not on the way to my house right now to give me a kiss  ’ ‘  my personality is like 90% the song i’m currently listening to  ’ ‘  the first step to any murder is to have fun and be yourself  ’ ‘  no offense @ life but can i have a breath.. a break... some slack...  ’ ‘  the best kind of alcohol is a lot  ’ ‘  911 i hate to be “that guy” but i glued myself to the ceiling again  ’ ‘  having “feelings” is ruining my reputation of being a heartless bitch  ’
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