#Colors Of Sakura [Sera Headcanons]

[sakurarisen]

🍡 - Can your muse cook? Can they bake? How well can they do either? Do they have any kitchen disaster stories? (I'm sorry, I HAD TO)

Miscellaneous Synbol HC's!

🍡 - Can your muse cook? Can they bake? How well can they do either? Do they have any kitchen disaster stories?

Asking Sera to cook is asking to lose your kitchen and stomach in one go. Full stop. XD She CAN'T cook, no matter how much she's taught to or tries, and worse? She can and will make something explode in the process of trying - And if she doesn't, well... You clearly don't value your stomach very much. Even if the kitchen is intact (and a little blackened from being cooked itself, if it doesn't explode that doesn't mean it's coming out unscathed; something is broken or burnt beyond repair), the end result in terms of food is... Not good. It's an odd color, clearly winking at you, bubbling oddly... At best it's burnt to a crisp, and whatever you find under the layers of burnt food is just more burnt. Asking Sera to cook is going to get someone begging you to save yourself!

On the flip side, though nobody is ever able to understand how, Sera's an amazing baker. While she can't make it translate into regular cooking, she's incredible at making muffins, cakes, cupcakes, bread... If it involved just full on baking, you can't go wrong asking Sera for help, and when she needs help, she'll just call on her older brother Thoma to give her a hand, or her in-laws! <3

That said, she doesn't have any specific kitchen disaster stories - Anything involving kitchens and cooking will do, though perhaps the worst times are when she's blown an actual hole in the wall from making the stove explode... She's forever sorry-

[sakurarisen-a]

13, 17, and 29 to give Sera some hc attention too c:

Uncommon Development Questions!

13. Have they ever been so overwhelmed they had to stop and take a break from something? 

This is actually something fairly common with Sera, as much as she tries to hide it. She’s constantly pushing herself to try and do more, get more done in a day, and she can’t always do that - And as much as she dislikes it and refuses to say as much, doing so builds a mental strain that, at least once a month, forces her to need to step back, vanish into the closest quiet spot be it a bathroom or even a corner in a closet, and breathe. The more worn down she is, the harder it is to keep her composure, and she needs a couple of hours of quiet to remind herself everything is fine. She needs to slow down and while she can’t say no to anyone who needs her, she can still make a conscious effort for a bit to keep to herself and take it easy until she can recover.

This is actually part of the reason she travels so much, too. She knows there’s no way she can change everything in the short timeframe she spends in a single place at a time, but she’s started - And it gives her a chance to let that change sink in and take root, and give her some space for some fresh air. She always comes back though - You can’t keep a flower from her dream, even if it overwhelms her sometimes with just how much she has to work at. <3

17. Is your character an introvert or an extrovert? How do they handle big crowds of people?

Sera’s actually an ambivert! She’s more than comfortable around people and loves to spend time with others, but she’s also someone who very much values her alone time and loves to listen just as much as she does to help. She tries to keep a good blend of both going, but it’s pretty natural for her to just fall into whatever role is needed of her at the time; if someone needs to talk, she’s always an ear to bed, while at the same time she’s more than content to just plop herself in the middle of a group of people and spend all day talking. She’s never understood it herself - how can she like quiet but also noise? - but she’s never seen a reason to question it.

Crowds, on the other hand, are... Iffy. It largely depends on what kind of crowd it is; if it’s a crowd of people she’s trying to help, she’s usually pretty good and has no problems with them, but putting her in the middle of a crowd in, say, Shinra HQ would make her increasingly more uncomfortable, because she’s not usually had good experiences with those kinds of crowds - The people who’re better off and don’t usually give those under them a second glance. Of course, that’s a feeling that can easily change and she’s more than fine if she needs to go shopping or something, but it just really depends on the setting and people present? Sera isn’t a girl who cares much for herself and instead frets more over what people will think of her companions for being seen with her, so it’s always a weird blend of ‘totally chill’ and ‘what if something happens?’.

29. Does your character get restless when things are too quiet or do they favour solitude and silence? Why? 

Both. This is a double-edged sword for her and varies by the day, and it’s surprisingly kindda frustrating for her; in the right mindframe, Sera loves solitude and quiet. It allows for time to clear her head and a chance to think, sort out her problems, and makes admiring the beauty of nature a lot easier whenever she gets the chance. Without a bunch of noise around her or something else influencing her thought process, she’s able to work through things quicker and easier and make far more sound decisions, and a way to put them into action.

But if she’s not ‘ready’ for that silence and solitude, so to speak, it oftentimes opens the door to restlessness and unease, and leaves cracks things she doesn’t want to think about can creep in. It’s not a crack she can easily patch up and requires getting back around noise and people to have a stop put to it, unfortunately, but it’s one that’s popped up more times than she’d like to remember. Old, buried memories, concerns about her daily routine and how things are going, what she needs to do next, where to go next and how to get there, all the negativity of the world around her... What creeps in varies, but it ultimately makes the quiet a double-edged blade and she’s eager to learn how to dull the side she doesn’t want, somehow. Anyhow.

[sakurarisen]

εїз

Send εїз for an unimplemented HC!

Shayan is a major target for Shinra's researchers, regardless of OG or Remake verses. As the son of a SOLDIER, his genetics are something of a mystery to them; he lacks the checks and balances SOLDIERs have at a genetic level, and while he retains much of Zack's abilities granted to him through the program, albeit on a weaker level, Shayan's had them since birth and didn't need the mako infusions his father had to make them happen. He drew mako to him before his birth naturally, just like Zack draws mako to himself, and used to to aid in his growth - But that doesn't mean Shayan has it easy, either.

He's quicker than most kids his age, and physically stronger. He's lighter on his feet and a natural if you put a play weapon in his hand. He even has the bright, sky blue eyes of SOLDIER - But he's also prone to mako poisoning as he lacks the internal limits his father does, tending to draw in residual mako in his surroundings and quickly falling ill if not caught fast enough. He isn't quite on the same level as a SOLDIER when it comes to strength and speed, but he's certainly more so than other kids, and quick to learn, but not to fully comprehend - further affected by the fact he is just a 4 year old child. Just what other details lie in his genetics are unknown, but it's something his parents are keeping a close eye on - Especially since Zack and Sera know all too well how researchers in Shinra would likely kill to get their hands on him and pick him apart, which is a major reason behind Sera's escape from Midgar with him after his birth.

This isn't exactly unimplemented right now so much as it just hasn't really come up in threads? Canon has shown us children of SOLDIER members before, but as far as I'm aware, they also drop context and hints that they were already born and even small children at minimum by the time their parent joined up. Again, as far as I'm personally aware, there's no records in canon of any children born to a SOLDIER after undergoing the mako infusion process to become one - Which makes me (and @honorisen ) wonder if A. SOLDIER are rendered infertile, if not so closely so it would take a miracle to have children at all, and B. if there have even been children of SOLDIER... And just what that would mean for the child, considering one parent would be, technically, genetically mutated to some degree.

Never mind what this would mean to Shinra; if a SOLDIER had a child like that, with no recorded instances of it happening before... It's Shinra. A kid like that would probably carry some key information to their research, and they've snatched up people for less. Shayan would have been a high priority target I'm sure, especially given his relation to Zack, but not quite enough to actively hunt him down - Doubly so when he had backup within the company in the form of my Kunsel to throw them off his trail, and Cissnei as a mysterious benefactor (Rebirth nonwithstanding at this point XD). There's enough in place to throw Shinra off Shayan's trail and keep him covered and protected, but not enough to make him not a target, especially since it's because of Shayan's birth Shinra raided Sera and Zack's home a year after he went missing under the guise of 'your paperwork was forged' - They wanted both Shayan and Sera, and it had nothing to do with her paperwork being forged by Kunsel.

Again, not really unimplemented so much as I haven't had a chance to bring it up yet, with only a few nods between myself and @honorisen before, this, but yep - Shayan is a high-value target of Shinra's, but not one important enough they have to chase him down Right Now. Sera and Zack are totally ready to give their all to protect him from anything either way. <3

[sakurarisen]

Sunflower, zinnia

Botanical Headcanons!

sunflower :   what brings your muse the most joy in life ? 

Her family,the beach, and seeing people happy and thriving. Sera is always at peace, content, and happy with her family - It’s with them she feels most at ease, and most relaxed. They know how to ease her anxieties and fears, to call them out and counter them and lay her mind at ease... They are warmth and peace. They’re comfort and rest, and to see them happy makes her happy, because it means she’s doing something right, and they enjoy having her around - And they’re leading their best lives.

It’s the same with seeing others happy - The world can be a cruel place, and to see others smiling, truly, fully, brightly smiling? It puts her soul at ease and a smile on her lips, as well. They deserve it (As does she, she’s learning, but she still will put others above herself), and knowing they’re finding happiness brings it to her, too, just as much as seeing kids, families, anyone really making the best of bad situations and never losing their smile - something that brings her hope, as well.

The beach is another one that puts her soul at ease and almost seems to transform her, taking the stresses, strains, and heartaches of life away with the tides. It’s cleansing and peaceful and Sera highly appreciates the sea and its beauty, and is able to spend hours there, just sitting on the sand, watching the tide and the waves, listening to the shoreline and the birds, the sunlight and water on her skin... Letting her sit there for a day can and will utterly transform her, just like letting her sit under the stars and allowing her to babble about the different legends and myths she’s heard in her travels will.

Prior to finding her family, it was others and the beach, same as above, but also geodes, sparkling, beautiful gifts she found once in a blue moon and were the only thing she allowed herself to collect not vital to her survival, as well as the stars.

zinnia :   how has the loss of fallen comrades and/or loved ones affected your muse ?   has it taught them anything or given them any new perspectives ?

Gonna put this one under a readmore for length, TW for mentions of: Death and abuse/child abuse

Sera’s definitely no stranger to loss. Growing up, she was sheltered by the middle kids of the family, Ami and Takeru - With their parents refusing to be parents, they took to trying to raise Sera in their stead to the point she considers her sister and brother to be far better parental figures than their mother and father ever were. Even under the abuse they faced, they never showed her anything but kindness, protection, and a smile, and on their death beds, expressed concern more for her than themselves. Losing them absolutely shattered Sera, who was only 9 when it happened, and resulted in her withdrawing and trying to rebel. What happened to Ami and Takeru sparked a desire in her to survive, and that’s been a trend that’s continued throughout her life.

Sera wants to honor her lost siblings’ lives in any way she can, and whether or not she’s realized it, they and that desire have been a major factor in her dream. Their kindness is something she’s adopted and there’s situations where she can be much like Ami, trying to diffuse and shield through that kindness, and channels both of her siblings in trying to internalize things while showing a smile to the world. They’re also the reason she sees a lot of things through a childish ‘fairy tale lens’ and has learned to use the stories as a means of understanding situations when nothing else works to help make sense of it - Ami would read her fairy tales and used the book to help try to teach her how to read until she and Takeru fell ill, and they’ve always stuck with her as much as their smiles have.

It’s similar to ‘losing’ @honorisen‘s Zack during the Nibelheim incident; though she knows he’s not gone due to the bond they share, it’s crushing to see the announcement of him being KIA. While she knows he isn’t gone, she has no proof and saying as much sounds ridiculous, and its difficult to not let the pain and heartache of ‘but what if he really is’ break through and settle in. Once more, without realizing it, he’s shaped how she follows her dream and her dream in general; she’s quicker to step n and help people. More impulsive, and by far more blunt in how she does it, though that she’s able to catch herself on and softens within a few months of it beginning (especially on realizing she’s pregnant with Shayan, something else that doesn’t help an unstable mental state). She takes on his name and tries to honor him by continuing his dream and life, and later, teaching their son all about him.  Like with Ami and Takeru, his lessons stick with her... But it takes a long time before she’s able to function again.

The difference is that later - losing Zack and the fact it comes with a mention of @warofthebeasts‘ Sephiroth also being supposedly KIA, furthering the pain and heartache with losing a friend who had been a welcome and wonderful companion on top of her fiance - is crushing enough to drive her to nearly lose herself. Though Sera, as an adult/older teen, is able to shape her dream and around honoring them and showing the world who they were as well and how amazing they were, losing her found family is crushing enough to nearly end her, and it’s only Shayan that keeps her going. Without hm, she may have fallen apart into nothingness - A thought she occasionally has that terrifies her.

Add in she’s lost everyone she knows in Midgar when she has to run and knows she can’t come back, with Shinra on her tail, and platefall a few years later destroying Sector 7...

In OG, ultimately Sera never stops. She wants answers. She wants to know how to stop Shinra, and she takes her nights after Shayan’s in bed searching - For Zack, for answers, for a means to stop Shinra... She needs to know and nothing comes of it, resulting in her death in Edge during Deepgrounds’ raid several years later.

In Remake, Sera may have developed issues with paranoia on regaining Zack, but if you look close, you can see where the losses she’s experienced - still including Zack - have shaped her and her dream, and where new lines are made. She’s learned, the hard way, the world is cruel and some people don’t and will never care... But it’s only made her want to see it change for the next generation all the more.

And by Shiva, she will do it.

[sakurarisen]

𝙾𝙱𝚂𝙲𝚄𝚁𝙴 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙲𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽𝚂.

WHAT  THEY  SMELL  LIKE.  Sera loves the outdoors and fairly regularly smells of flowers, wood, and grass, especially prior to settling down due to her traveling and sleeping in trees. However, she vastly prefers fruity and beachy scents when it comes to shampoos, bodywashes, and perfumes, though she doesn’t often wear the later without reason to - she adores strawberry scents and watermelons, and gravitates to them enough that her bathroom is full of them, resulting in her smelling much like a fresh strawberry or watermelon after a shower or a bath until nature once more takes over. This only changes when she’s had a long and stressful day and tries out a bathbomb to relax in with her partner, more often than not going for florals here like lavender, sweet pea, and cherry blossom, or when she’s been at the beach, leaving her smelling much like the sand water, and fresh breeze she loves so dearly.

HOW  THEY  SLEEP.  SLEEPING  POSITION.  SCHEDULE.  ETC. Pre-settling, it was often on her back or on her side in a tight ball; she’d sleep in trees if she could find any, and on her back was usually the only option there. If no tree, she’d find shelter under a rock, brush, or even on a rock, and curl up as tight as she could with her bag for a pillow to keep herself as out of the way and unnoticeable as possible, including whenever she was allowed a cot or bed at an inn or someone’s home. Once given her own bed, be it in the treehouse or her home on the plate, she shifts into a more comfortable side position, or snuggles herself into Zack’s side, and has only begun sleeping restfully and comfortably since living with him.

As for schedule, she doesn’t stick to a strict one - She usually sleeps either whenever Zack goes to bed or she’s too tired to stand, or when she has no work left, which can be anywhere from 11pm to 2am, sometimes even later or even not at all. Regardless of when she crashes, though, she’s up at dawn and rising with the sun if it’s allowed to shine into her room, with the only means of making her sleep in to avoid sunlight actually shining in through the window. She’ll then either be woken by her partner getting up or sleep in closer to noon - A sign she needs more sleep than she ever gets, if her occasional after dinner naps (once a week to every other week, at best unless otherwise overworked) aren’t enough to say as much.

WHAT  MUSIC  THEY  ENJOY.  She doesn’t really have a favorite? She’s fond of instrumentals and would listen to anything light and lacking vocals for hours, yet at the same time she’s also into light rock, pop, classical... She’ll listen to a lot of things as long as it’s not blaring, overly loud and screaming, and you’ll usually catch her dancing, if not singing along! She’s especially fond of regional musics, such as things that would be played at a festival or a fair, and you’re specially likely to catch her dancing and humming along then when she’s learned the tune.

HOW  MUCH  TIME  THEY  SPEND  GETTING  READY  EACH  MORNING.  Half and hour to about 45 minutes, at most. If not distracted by her family, she’ll get up, wash up or shower if it’s a shower day (which is every other day unless she’s been sweating or something else comes up), take the time to brush out her hair and occasionally towel dry it if she’s not letting it air dry, dress, and tend to her part in breakfast duties. There’s not much she does special unless the day itself is meant to be special or she’s distracted by something.

FAVOURITE  THING  TO  COLLECT.  Geodes. She doesn’t really talk about it and keeps these a secret, but they’re the only non-essential thing she allowed herself to have before she settled down, a small sparkle of brightness found in the most unsuspecting of places that never failed to make her smile. She doesn’t have many and her collection is more fragments and small crystals over larger, fuller pieces, but they sit in a special box that has long since been added to as something of a treasure box since meeting Zack and had other memories tucked into it alongside them.

Second place goes to sea hearts - seeds growing in Gongaga’s jungle often swept out to sea by the rivers once dropped.

LEFT  OR  RIGHT  HANDED.  Right-handed

FAVOURITE  SPORT(S). To watch? None, unless it’s the local kids playing, but I’m not sure that counts. To play, she’s not partial to any in particular, especially because she’s not in the best of health even when she’s better about taking care of herself as an adult, but she does like to play soccer and kickball with her boys and the local kids. She needs a break to catch her breath after around an hour and a half, but it’s nice to hear them laughing~

FAVOURITE  TOURISTY  THING  TO  DO  WHEN  TRAVELLING.  SEE EVERYTHING. Is there a sight to see that tourists usually flock to? She wants to see it! She wants to see everything she can and explore, visit all the places, try all the foods she’s able to, make all the memories she can - She’s the tourist you’ll find lighting up like a kid on christmas and asking whoever she’s with to go see whatever sounds interesting, just because she wants to explore. She wants to attend and see it all!

Second place goes to spending all day on the beach, but that’s less a touristy thing and more just Sera’s being drawn to the beach and sea overall.

FAVOURITE  KIND  OF  WEATHER.  Mild weather! Sera doesn’t do well with super hot or super cold, so she’s really into more mild weather where she can just walk outside without a coat or sweater of any kind and enjoy the sunlight. She likes to go for walks, see clear, cool nights where she can watch the stars, stand comfortably on the beach... If it rains, that’s okay too, she can stand under something and watch the rain fall and jump in the puddles - Just as long as it’s a mid-temp kind of day and she can get a few minutes outside, at least, to do her outdoor errands and chores comfortably. <3

WEIRD  /  OBSCURE  FEAR  THEY  HAVE.  Specific bugs. Sera has a LOT of fears though of all of them, it’s perhaps her fear of bugs with many legs and shells/’creepy crawlies’ that’s the most obscure or weird - She’s fine with a lot of bugs, but it’s things like roaches, crickets, and centipedes/milipedes and beetles that scare her. They creep her out and leave her unsettled and spooked, no thanks she’ll do without them thanks-

THE  CARNIVAL  /  ARCADE  GAME  THEY  ALWAYS  WIN  WITHOUT  FAIL. Skeeball and ring toss! Sera’s pretty good at judging distances, strength needed, and the like, and can fairly accurately figure out how hard and where to throw, even if she doesn’t understand how or how to explain her reasoning for it. She’ll usually give away any prizes (or tickets!) she gets from it, too, but it’s not unlike her to be convinced to keep one if whoever’s with her notices it making her eyes light up like a kid, or is dog or cat themed.

tagging: @honorisen, @kaibacorpbros, @firxga, @azure-steel​, @yoroiis​, @auraguardians​

[sakurarisen]

Although Sera is technically a phoenix at her core, she doesn't really have all that much in terms of access to her power. Everything she held to her name as Aria - her ice magic and healing magic, mostly - has been locked down underneath a frozen glacier deep within her, wrapped tightly around her core as Aria and preventing her from getting any too close to any of it. What abilities she does still have are completely minimal and require some kind of aid for her to use them, be they materia in FF7 verses or her vision in Genshin Impact, etc, and are never stronger than the small bits she's able to safely use as a human - totaling out to maybe 3 or 4% of Aria's full strength.

Even so, this naturally makes her skills a slight bit stronger than the average human's, even though it's not much. When casting something like Blizzard, the ice hunk created might be a tiny bit bigger and more solid than say, Zack's, while her healing skills are a smidge stronger in a similar fashion, being able to fully heal certain injuries where others couldn't, but still not much past that. It's enough to be noticed if one is really paying attention, but not much overall; While someone could reasonably tell her ice feels colder to the touch and in a couple inches bigger in formation at best, it's really not all that remarkable, and her lack of skill with other magic types and elements naturally leads to the thought she was likely just focused on the two and failed to train in anything else.

She cannot access anything under the 'frozen lake' without dying, the power too much for her human form to handle, and though she doesn't understand why she would be so afraid of such a thing, even she doesn't know if that death would be her last, a concept that is terrifying and she's done her best to not think of due to a severe lack of understanding. There's no telling what it would take to retake her original form as the Snow Phoenix at this point, but the signs of her being less than an actual human still remain, even if she can't explain them - She's just slowly learning to accept them as just being Sera.

[sakurarisen]

mind: does my muse have any mental conditions that affect their lives? what are they? how do they handle them? what coping methods do they use most? 

All About A Sera's Health~!

mind: does my muse have any mental conditions that affect their lives? what are they? how do they handle them? what coping methods do they use most? 

Apologies for long ahead of time because wow this unintentionally is long XD

Sera does - She has anxiety, both general and a little social, some issues with depression, and PTSD, none of which are particularly diagnosed in most verses because Sera very much dislikes seeing doctors of any kind, but it's been brought up to her in most and she actually agrees with it, even if she won't say as much to most people. Even when she isn't aware there's names for it, she's more than aware she has something going on - But even in this case, she's prone to just calling it "her nightmare" and "the nightmare's voice", largely because she has nothing else to actually call it by. It keeps her constantly looking over her shoulder, afraid of thunderstorms, unable to handle large crowds of people on her own or tight things around her wrists, being alone with someone clearly scheming or giving her strange looks. and doesn't do well with people who've made their intention to hurt others clear, among other triggers.

As for dealing with it... That depends on what point in her life you're asking her. While she's usually good at hiding it and only breaking down in private, or excusing herself to deal with it alone, she's still dealing with it alone until she finds herself a home and settles down with Zack, and 'dealing with it alone' doesn't usually go well. She's prone to breaking down when she's alone, curling into a little ball and sobbing... For a long time, Sera would've - and did at one point to Zack - described herself as a 'broken porcelain doll stuck in a glass box', eventually progressing that to 'a broken doll played with and thrown aside out of the owner's boredom'. She may have seemed to have it under control, but in truth, her 'nightmare' controlled a lot of what she did and how she acted, and she just didn't have the words - or ability - to explain it.

As she grows into her 20's, however, and finally allows herself to develop a tight support network, she learns better ways to explain herself and her mental state and problems, and discovers better coping skills, as well as ways to combat 'the nightmare' that is her PTSD, fears, and anxiety. Grabbing or touching something physical - grabbing onto the hem of her shirt or the sides of her skit/pants, holding Zack's hand, touching his shoulder or arm, leaning against a tree and pressing her palms flat against it, etc - is a big way to keep her grounded and remembering what's real life and what's just her mind trying to run away with itself, the feeling of something solid and physical a wonderful way to help in re-focusing herself.

She's learned breathing exercises, and has anti-anxiety measures frequently nearby that change depending on verse, like squishy keychain toys, fidget toys, and in all verses, her stuffed husky, Zax. Zack and their closest friends who know of her traumas - a number of people she can count on one hand - are on speed dial on her phone, and reachable with the press of a button, or at least easily reachable in verses where phones don't exist (Genshin), ready to pose a 'rescue' and give her a safe place to break down if she can't avoid it, or help her fight off the 'nightmare', be it with distractions or helping to talk her through it.

To that, she's also learned how to talk through it, and while she doesn't have the 'proper words', persay, even now to explain how she feels or what's going on with her, she's taken to Zack's nickname for her of 'Kitten' and embraced the idea of 'I am a kitty' much like a child, and uses that to help explain herself when everything else fails. Sera is very much capable of being a mature adult and regularly is, only being childish around close friends and family who're okay with her being silly and embracing the childhood she never had, but even then, 'bad kitty' when she feels like she's screwed up something and can't figure out what or how is pretty self-explanatory, and so is 'Kitty doesn't feel good-'; if she's referring to herself as 'kitty', it's fairly known she's having trouble dealing with something really upsetting her she doesn't otherwise have the words to explain any better.

She doesn't have her mental state fully under control just yet - There's still a lot Sera doesn't know how to handle or how to word, and she's someone who will try to deal with things alone to avoid being a burden on others, but she's certainly come a long way and is still learning, each and every day.

[sakurarisen]

fill out the angst application below.

basics

> NAME - Seraphina Fair

> AGE - 21 (24 in Rebirth and Genshin verses)

> SPECIES - Human (elemental phoenix/human hybrid, unknown to her)

bold what applies (italicize what somewhat applies)

drinker ; smoker ; done/does drugs ; knows what a broken heart feels like ; has committed a crime ; suffers a physical disability ; suffers a mental disorder ; has experienced severe trauma

details

> BIGGEST FEAR -  Dying without making any kind of difference or change in the world. Although Sera isn’t clueless and knows ‘changing the world’ is very much unlikely to happen in her lifetime, no matter how much she tries for it and would love to see it herself, it terrifies her to die without having left even the tiniest of impacts - To know she was nothing more than a drop of water into a vast sea, unable to change anything for anyone, or even help anyone. There’s so much to change, so many people who need help in a world so designed to beat them down, the thought of leaving them without doing everything she can... That’s genuinely a nightmare in itself to her.

On the same level is losing her family and loved ones; her husband is frequently involved in dangerous work, they have kids she doesn’t doubt are always in danger due to having them for parents, her brother is oftentimes in the line of fire for his own work, her friends also have dangerous jobs... All it takes is one slip, and that, too, is a nightmare that often plagues her when she least expects it.

> RECURRING NIGHTMARE - Sera tends to relive her various traumas in her nightmares at least two or three times a week. If she’s lucky enough to not have a nightmare about her trauma, it’s one involving losing her family or being captured by people who want to do them/her harm, or, on rarer occasions, being lost in absolute darkness with no way out, no light, and no body to hear her scream. Thankfully, these nightmares slow to one to two times a week when she’s able to sleep next to her husband, or when her brother is visiting,but they’ve never stopped completely.

> SOMETHING YOU MISS - Her lost siblings, Ami and Takeru, the childhood she never had, and several people she met during her travels she, unfortunately, no longer has contact with. Friends she hasn’t seen in long periods also fall under this category, as well as her brother, Thoma, when she’s unable to see him due to the (physical) distance between them.

> BIGGEST REGRET - Not knowing anything as a child, and being unable to save Ami and Takeru. Although she had no idea what was really going on until shortly before their passing, when they told her as much themselves, Sera has never stopped regretting she hadn’t done things differently, or tried everything in her power to save them, somehow. This regret is doubled when she discovers Thoma is her brother rather than her cousin, both having been raised to believe the later due to his being given up to their aunt and uncle, and realizes they never questioned their obvious similarities as children, missing out on the bond they now share up to this point.

She also heavily regrets when she’s unable (or inable) to help others, and walking away, for any reason, or being unable to stop someone’s pain even long enough to bring them the tiniest of smiles, constantly weighs on her. Logically, she knows there are some things she just can’t do, change, or handle, but it still hits her hard, and lingers.

> A SECRET - Sera is, at her core, an elemental phoenix - Specifically a snow phoenix - who has slowly assumed human form over her multiple lives and rebirths. At this point, only her core is an elemental being; She’s long since shifted fully into a human and is technically a human past this; Aria, the snow phoenix, has buried herself down deep and, for all intents and purposes, ‘gone to sleep’ in her attempt to be a human. This has resulted in the ‘frozen lake’ Sera often feels/mentions sits within her and knows there’s a great deal of something under, and occasionally can access a bit of ‘water’ from from the occasional crack in its surface, but can never break through - The ice is too thick by her own unconscious doing in every lifetime, this one being no different, and subconsciously, she knows breaking the ice would end her life... Even if she has no idea she is Aria, or that the phoenixes ever exist/existed, or that her brother, Thoma, is Aria’s twin, the fire phoenix Aelius, tucked away in him much the same and born first due to their rebirth cycles falling out of sync, turning the twins into ‘older brother and little sister’ instead.

pick one

fire or water

mother or father neither-

to hurt or be hurt

eerie or gory

unrequited love or no love

TAGGED BY: It’s been in my drafts so long I CAN’T REMEMBER-

TAGGING: @waltzofphoenix​, @yoroiis, Snag it! <3

[sakurarisen]

Quick Sera headcanon - She's actually amazing at Fort Condor, and doesn't often lose, though it's definitely not unheard of for her to, given mistakes and misjudgements happen. This is all due to her being a really good tactician and strategist, capable of quickly thinking on her feet and assessing situations fairly easily - Skills she's learned from her life to this point, though she's not really of the heart or mind to admit to it past reminding her husband IS a former SOLDIER, and she's incredibly close friends with others, both Ex and still in the program alike.

All the same, she doesn't like the 'we're at war' theming of the game and chooses to ignore that part of it as much as she struggles to handle war and senseless fighting outside of it. Wars aren't something to make a game out of, she decided a long time ago, but it doesn't make her any less capable of applying her skills to it and oftentimes coming out victorious-

[sakurarisen]

εїз !

Send εїз for an unimplemented HC!

Sera's scars, spread around the fronts of her shoulders and trailing some up towards the tops, are actually pretty ugly. For the most part, they're jagged and several have healed rather poorly, seeing some of the scars combine into one mess while others look like valleys surrounded by mountain ranges - Very few have properly healed, resembling something akin to cat scratches, a result of infection having set in after the injuries had been inflicted. Though it's hard to tell just how many are actually there due to the combining and overall difficulty of the healing process, there's at least 18 to 20 scars there, and Sera does her best to keep them covered up and hidden until the birth of her son, Shayan.

She's not about to tell anyone how she gained these scars, but those who know why she replies with a bright smile constantly tinged with sadness and pain are quick to change topics for her, or to come up with some kind of cover story in her stead, much to her constant thanks. They come from a dark point in her life she wishes to never discuss outside of those she trusts above all else, and if they were easy to ignore, she would.

...But unfortunately, life is rarely that kind. With the scars spread out, from either side of her neck out to the edges of her shoulders, they regularly cause issues for her when it comes to lifting her arms, using her bow, and even shrugging; any use of her shoulders past lifting her arms about halfway runs the risk of causing discomfort and even a bit of pain due to the skin being tight around the larger and uglier of the scars, and activities like drawing her bow cause aches without fail - Aches she has long since taught herself to ignore and put out of her mind. Those aware of these issues will receive a shrug when questioning her about it, if they notice any small flinches or sighs, and an excuse; She's not about to burden them with something she can't do anything about, and had leaned how to deal with them, either by icing them, a heat pack, or just taking some time to rest, the later of which is hard to do when the weather is poor and irritates all kinds of aches, not just her shoulders.

The primary reason why this is being counted as unimplemented is because it's new - Sera has always had these shoulder scars, and the reason behind them, which I won't go into here for a multitude of reasons, has not changed. What has changed, though, is how they look and how they've healed and affect her; reading about another character's scarring in another series (unrelated to anything I have on blog here, or on ANY of my blogs) has made me realize I didn't put enough thought into how her scars would have healed and present themselves now, especially given she received them around the age of 12, long before she was done growing, and they were infected due to her recovery and living conditions at the time. There was no possible way they were going to heal into essentially cat scratch looking scars and be perfectly fine given the conditions they were 'healing' under. i needed to rehaul their appearance and effect on Sera - And this was the result, so it won't be 'unimplemented' for too much longer, I just need to figure out how to word it in her carrd. <3

[sakurarisen]

Oak: Who does your muse consider the strongest person they know?

Botanical Headcanons!

oak :   who would your muse consider the strongest person they know ?  

That would be a tossup between Zack and her eldest brother, Thoma, I think - Or both! They're both incredibly strong but in different ways, and without the both of them, Sera probably would've fallen apart well before having Shayan, despite the fact she's unable to see Thoma as much as she'd like to.

For Zack, it's his ability to face anything and come out with a smile, even if that smile is forced. It's the jokes always on the tip of his tongue, the level head when he knows to be serious, and his refusal to go against his morals, for any reason. It's his refusal to (willingly) leave her side when she needs him, even if it's only a little, and his dedication to his friends and loved ones, always making sure he's there for them with any advice he can offer. Zack is a man who would give you the shirt off his back if he thought it could help, and he's become so much of a rock for Sera, she wouldn't be where she is now without him... Honestly, she's not sure she'd even be alive if not for him, for a multitude of reasons.

When it comes to Thoma, though, it's all about his strength in facing things Sera's sure are too much. His level head enables him to navigate around issues and heavy conversations with ease, and his kindness and gentleness makes him someone who can calm her down just by being in the same room as her, or by talking about something unrelated, like a shopping trip. His presence alone is calming and supportive, and he never faces anything without a bright, relaxing smile - something Sera wishes she could do. He's able to take problems and pick them apart piece by piece, slowly and easily, and never fails to be right there with a shoulder to lean on when he's needed, be it by letters, calls, or actually taking the chance to travel out her way and visit, or her to him. Even when they thought themselves cousins and had no idea of their sibling relationship, he was always the one to make things better.

Cloud, @warofthebeasts's Sephiroth, and @waltzofphoenix's Diluc (In Genshin verse) come in close second to them, for a lot of the same reasons. <3

As for Shayan... His parents both would likely take that primary spot of strongest, even though Sera would beg to differ on being anything even close to the sort. To him, they're comfort and peace, security, strength and calmness and everything in between - He doesn't know much about the world outside his home, but he knows whenever a problem comes up, his parents always seem to know what to do - Whether or not it's a problem he's caused, nobody tell them he broke a vase last week-

[sakurarisen]

Goldenrod, holly, poppy, and sunflower because Sera needs some headcanon asks <3

Botanical Headcanons!

goldenrod :   does your muse believe in luck or fortune ?  why or why not ?   where do they believe these things come from ? 

Yes! XD Jokes aside, Sera believes in both, and that they're two different things; Luck is just luck. It varies. Some people are luckier than others, you have good luck days and bad luck days, and it's affected a lot by your surroundings - You can have the best luck on the planet, it's not going to spare you if the god of bad luck is standing beside you and everything starts going wrong! Might dodge getting hit by a falling brick, but probably not from tripping over the curb over there. Just the same, your luck can be incredible with coinflips but if someone is having bad luck and runs into you? It's gonna affect yours and you'll probably call it wrong. Luck varies, but it exists.

Just the same, she fully believes in fortune, and it too is affected by the things around you - But it's less 'how lucky are you' and more akin to trying to read a person's future. A bad luck day can totally affect it? The future isn't set in stone, Sera's always believed. There's destiny, which is also different, and things can affect how your future plans out; you can be destined to change the world in a certain way, but how that comes about? That's gonna change. Your fortunes can change, and will change.

That's what Sera's always believed since leaving 'home', and it's gotten her through a lot of hard times. She's a woman who sometimes wants to understand things, to have a reason for them, and while she totally understands she can't always have those, Fortune and Luck are often what she leans back on for the sake of having something - anything - to get some solid footing on. Someone's having some bad luck and it made their mood sour. They're just... A sour person. Their role in the world is to be cruel, even if she wants desperately to change that. She can't explain where she even came into these beliefs from aside from hearing about 'drawing fortune slips' and what they are in her travels, but? Makes sense to her! <3

holly :   how strong is your muse’s sense of intuition ?  are they aware of it ?   do they ever fear that it is only paranoia ? 

Sera has a pretty strong sense of intuition, and she listens to it pretty regularly - it's actually part of what's kept her alive all this time, and she's fairly aware it's there and what it's done for her. For a long time, though, she did fear it was paranoia; when traveling alone, before she finally had the ability to settle down, hiding was her go-to tactic. At that point in her life, she could barely fight well enough to keep herself breathing if she needed to, and she already heavily disliked doing so - stealth was her first and most common tactic as a result, and, prior to having Zack to tell her otherwise, it felt... Silly. It felt like she was simply too afraid to even walk past someone else on a road, even though on some level, she knew better.

She's long since learned just what her intuition is and that it's important to listen to it, and doing so has made her a good tactician and partner, both on a battlefield and off. It's ensured being a mercenary (or jack of all trades, depending on the verse) is a job she's capable of doing, and she's become good backup, constantly relying on her intuition in everything. After all... If it hasn't really led her wrong yet, why shouldn't she?

poppy :   what comforts your muse ?

Zack and her kids. Her biggest comfort has, from the day they met, and always will be, her husband Zack and later on, their kids, being the first ones she turns to when she recognizes she needs comfort and support every time without fail - And even when she doesn't recognize it first, as Zack usually will before her and make himself available to her, even if it's dealing with work with an arm around her to keep her close.

Likewise, when she's able to see him, her eldest brother, Thoma, is also a source of comfort, and if she can't see him, she'll write him to find that sense of comfort when she needs it. They're in frequent contact, and he falls under the same category and reason as Zack and the kids - He's family. Her found family (and blood, in Thoma and the kid's cases), will always be her primary and biggest source of comfort and strength, and have given Sera a reason to want to see tomorrow.

Aside from family and tight friends, or if she's unable to find them when she needs that sense of comfort, it's a stuffed dog she's named Zax. A gift from a friend, it's a well-loved husky plush named after Zack while still being its own thing, kept in the house and never taken outside of it unless she knows she'll need it on a long trip. It's soft and hugable and has definitely seen better days, but it's something to hug and close her eyes and hide her face in. It's a comforting scent and feeling and it never fails to help her calm down and relax, and is even a sounding board for things she's too afraid to talk to others about, or simply can't.

Coming in a close second is the beach and the sea and the tides, the night sky, and an open field, especially one full of flowers - All incredibly comforting, but not always something she can get to when she needs it. If she can, though? You bet your socks this girl'll be down at the beach, sitting there for hours just to watch the tide come in and out-

sunflower :   what brings your muse the most joy in life ?

Again, the beach and nature and seeing her dream finally move forward, seeing the world change and people's smiles and happiness... Those can, do, and will always bring her an incredible amount of joy. Her stuffed dog Zax makes her happy. Her friends bring her even more. There is a lot in her life that brings her an incredible amount of joy these days, and she won't ever deny it - Not when she's been searching for this for her entire life!

But even above that, it's her family. It's Zack, and Thoma. It's getting to sit and watch Shayan show his grandparents his plushies. It's snuggling into Zack as the sunlight shines into their bedroom, and know she doesn't have to get up - she can stay in his arms forever, and not a soul would stop her. it's seeing Kunsel give the kids rides around on his shoulders. Learning how to bake something new with Thoma before they take the evening to go for a walk around town, and laugh about silly things and chat about the local animals. Coming home to the called out greetings of her family and a chance to kiss her husband as a 'welcome home'. Looking up from her map while she's working to see Zack watching her with a shine in his eyes that says he's proud of her, and how far she's come. In her GI verse, it's the chance to sit around one of the city's fountains with her family and friends Kaeya, Albedo, and Diluc, and take in the warmth and comfort of having them all close by under a clear sky while the sound of Mondstadt seems so distant, but relaxing, writing letters to distant friends while they chime their input to those they know.

Sera finds an immense amount of joy in the small things, but it'll always be dwarfed by the joy she find in her family, both found and blood - A family that also includes her closest friends. Growing up, this was something she never thought she'd find, and at one point, never thought she deserved, but not that she has it... She's never going to let it go. This is her comfort, her peace, and her joy, and it's obvious when she can't keep the peaceful, calm smile off her lips around them. <3

[sakurarisen]

If asked today, would your muse say they were happy? How long have they been happy?

Headcanon/Development Questions!

If asked today, would your muse say they were happy? How long have they been happy?

Sera would hesitate, but ultimately, say yes, especially after she has her family and settled down. Actually saying she's happy is such an unfamiliar feeling for her, she can't help but to hesitate when asked - All her life she's said she is, and it's been a lie. She's never been happy, yet Sera has always tried to convince herself she is; after everything she's been through, shouldn't she be? She'd had clothes to wear, a place to sleep, and (usually) something to eat, and that alone should mean she's happy... Right?

It's not until she settles down with Zack and their family that she realizes: She hasn't been. She's been doing her best to say she is to avoid worrying others, but overall, saying "Yes I'm happy" has also prevented her from having to admit to herself she's not okay, and never has been. That she's dealing with more than anyone ever should, and doesn't know how to cope - Reasons why it's shoved down and covered up, a means to keep her on her feet and functioning. If she doesn't face it, it doesn't exist.

Yet it's also at that point she can confidently say that now, she is - Truly, fully happy, and has been since she's had a chance to actually settle down and enjoy her life with her family. It's only been a few years, and sure, it's still got its struggles; she's still dealing her traumas and finally facing the fact she isn't okay with the tools in hand to deal with it, there's threats still to her family and even her own life, her childhood is still chasing her... But she's Alive.

She has a wonderful family in her husband and their children and even been accepted as part of the Fair family by his parents. She has her older brother, Thoma, determined to help keep her on her feet and make up for the years they've missed out on. She's able to face the nightmares she's been avoiding all her life and the darkness within her, and tackle it head on to the point she knows how to smile in the face of it and dig in her heels when it bites back, and how to keep herself from crashing as hard as she used to.

Yes, she's happy now - but that's a hard won happiness, and she'll fight anyone and everyone to keep it, with everything in her.

[sakurarisen]

Updated tag drop for Sera!

[sakurarisen]

♫☃♏

Headcanon Time!

♫:  three of my muse’s favorite songs

Given Sera would honestly say anything traditional, soft, lyrical - Essentially she'd sit and listen to soft rock or local music, really, along with, ironically, the Stamp song from Remake, she'll never explain why - I'm gonna cheat and pick off my playlist for her. XD The top three would be Speechless - Naomi Scott, This Is Me - Kesha (which admittedly in more modern verses does make her cry when she's able to listen to it and is one of her primary theme songs), and Return of the Snow Queen - Phrynna <3 Though honestly anything Lindsey Stirling releases is also way there, both on her playlist (Foreverglow especially!) and as something Sera herself would listen to!

☃:  does my muse like the holidays?

Sera loves them, especially christmas! There's something comforting about them, especially now that she's older, and she loves christmas especially for being a season where people are generous. For a few weeks out of the year, people reach deep into their heart and become kinder, gentler, more open - Things she wants to see all year round, and she hopes to eventually see the magic of christmas eventually stretch out past those few weeks.

She's also especially fond of holiday decorations - she never really got to see those as a child, and now that she has her own home and family, she's prone to going all out and decorating everything she can, especially if it's sparkly and shiny! <3 Sparkly easter eggs, glitter and fake snow, lights and sparkles... She loves all of it, and never fails to get lost in the magic of the holidays! <3

♏:  something my muse obsesses over

TW: Abuse mentions ahead.

Tending to Zack's sword and doing chores. Although it's way too big and heavy for her, very nearly matching her height, Sera will stay up all night to clean it and make sure it's ready for use the following day, even if it doesn't appear to need tending to. Likewise, she's forgo sleep to get her household tasks done, or to run errands and take care of deliveries - If she has anything left to do at the end of the day, she simply can't sleep. It weighs on her and leaves her restless, and more than once Zack's woken in the middle of the night to her in the kitchen washing dishes rather than actually sleeping beside him.

In truth, it's not so much of an obsession, though it certainly presents itself as one, and is more in line with her traumas; Sera will call it a need to be a 'good kitty' to those close enough to her she feels safe being completely honest with, and it ties in both with her nickname of 'Kitten' from Zack and her past abuse. Being 'kitten' is something of a personal shield for her (for reasons I won't get into here because that's a meta/HC in and of itself) and serves as her last line of defense, and she desperately wants to be 'good' - She wants to be dependable. She wants to be reliable. Upbeat. Not a bother. Helpful. Someone people look at and smile, not roll their eyes and get tired of whenever she's in the same room as them.

If she gets everything done she needs to, nobody has a reason to complain about it. If his sword is clean and tended to, it's one less weight on his shoulders, and one less task he has to worry about. If she can keep the kitchen clean then nobody can worry about it, or call her out on it not being sparkling. Work done on time, or even better early, means nobody else is put out because of her. She's not a disappointment, and nobody will be angry or upset or disappointed in her. She's kitten, and she's been good and helpful!

....Right?

[sakurarisen]

웃:  three people that are important to my muse

Headcanon Time!

There's Zack - It's him who Sera can and will always credit with saving her, in more ways than she can actually put into words, but he's also someone she loves more than there's stars in the sky. To her, he accomplished his goal of becoming a hero long ago; he's generous, kind, sweet, helpful... Zack is an eager puppy in human form, and even when he comes back to her after Nibelheim, he's still putting everyone else before himself. He fusses over others in his own unique way and never has a harsh word for anyone who doesn't outright deserve it, and it's his smile that makes everything right in her world.

He's her other half in several ways, and he understands her ad gives her a place to belong, even when she feels she doesn't deserve it. Sera's been able to bounce things off him and show him her worst sides, and even though things started out rocky, he's never failed to prove himself willing to learn and to explain, and take her hand with a gentle touch she's never found in anyone else. Zack is her star, and she'll never not have him on a list like this. <3

There's also Sephiroth, who while she's heard stories of and fully believes them, she can't for the life of her see them when she looks at him, especially pre-Nibelheim. Sera's sure he's as fearsome as the stories told imply - He wouldn't be called a hero for no reason, after all! That's a titles one has to earn, especially when it's all of Midgar who agree with it and call him such! But to Sera herself, he's warm. Friendly. Comfortable.

She's sure she should probably be more respectful or fearful with him, but it's so hard to be when even silence is comfortable, something she doesn't normally like, and 'time out and about' is often walks around Midgar and soft talks. He's very brotherly, Sera's long since decided, and she's come to see him as such - Though it's perhaps that reason exactly why his later turn on the planet itself hurts so badly. Even though she's had a reputable source come to tell her the Sephiroth she knows is long since gone at that point, it's hard to believe it... She only hopes he find peace when he's done with whatever it is he feels he needs to do.

And thirdly, there's Shayan - Her son she really wishes would stop asking for his own pet chocobo. XD He's a miracle in and of himself and she still doesn't understand how he's here - really, she never will understand and that's fine by her - but she absolutely treasures him. He's what gave her the strength to escape Midgar after Nibelheim, kept her breathing and functioning, and above all else, helped her see she wants to see tomorrow even more than Zack did - She wants to see a world where he can grow up and thrive, and despair over what had become of her and her family after having to run was something she couldn't allow to win.

He's a gentle, kind, and considerate child with his father's eyes and determination, and she's almost certain he knows more than he lets on. Maybe he does, maybe he doesn't... Whatever the answer there, it doesn't matter, so long as she can see him safe and smiling. <3