#DecolonizationIsAProcess

[kataibusaibiin]

What is something new you've recently tried or learned?

Me? Check it out! Another instrument followed me home this week...

Say hello to the Zhonghu (中胡) which I'll be learning to play in this semester's Chinese ensemble as we're introduced to Silk and Bamboo music (江南絲竹 Jiangnan Sizhu).

Zhonghu is an alto version of an Erhu (二胡), a 2 spike fiddle from the Huqin family. I’ll also pick up the Gaohu (高胡) as our class explores Cantonese ensemble music from Guangdong Province. So, my sanshin has a new friend! (They’re cousins, I suppose.) Let's hope we all get along!!! 😅

As ridiculous as it is to add this class to my current schedule or to think that someone like me would go anywhere near another instrument, there were several reasons that drew me to consider this unique opportunity, including my  own family’s relationship to China. And, as some of you know, my decision to follow the path that led me here to Hawai'i meant making promises about leaning into challenges and embracing opportunities to stretch and grow beyond my comfort zone.

So, here we are...

Ultimately, as much as they challenge me and force me to confront many of my anxieties, I find the opportunity to study music and dance is a regenerative experience and adds so much dimension to both what and how I learn. And despite how stressful performance is for me, these are also spaces where it feels I can show up as my whole self and connect with others in ways I've not experienced with anything else, even through my work as a visual artist. And if you know anything about what my experiences have been navigating academia, you know I need all the love balm, authentic connection, and cognitive armor I can get to survive...I think we all do, but I’ve been feeling this especially as I continue to be nudged to pursue a masters or PhD and/or return to teaching!

The ethnomusicology classes here (and, for that matter, my Second Language Studies) are like an antidote for those toxic environments where professors openly admit they teach about Okinawa because their goal is to turn us into tourists, professors who avoid acknowledging Loochoo / Okinawan indigeneity also cavalierly use "Eskimo" when speaking about Inuit and non-Inuit alike, and white men are positioned as authorities on our cultures and identities even when they answer students' questions and refute our lived experiences by saying things like, "Well, no, I'm married to a Japanese woman, and I've never heard that before..." etc...

I could go on, but I don't mean for this to become simply a rant about the need to decolonize /and indigenize academia. And yet, these feelings and the fatigue that stems from wading through that on a perpetual basis are related to why I'm so grateful for the dance and music classes I have opportunity to take and the practitioners sharing their amazing skills and knowledge of their own cultures with incredible graciousness, self-awareness, passion, and patience.

Anyway, now that I've shared some of the fear, excitement, and gratitude of bringing home another instrument, I leave you with a few more questions to ponder...

What is something you do every day / week that is healing or restorative? What led you to incorporate this as a regular practice?

Is there something you struggle with or might feel you're not good at but love to do? Is there something you used to enjoy but stopped doing because you thought you would never be great at it? What do/did you love about it?

What's something you've recently done in an effort to #decolonize your day-to-day life / your community?